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[ - ] Can anyone recommend a nice, wooden play kitchen? 3 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 01:17 PM Flag
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With Cinderella inside? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 01:36 PM Flag
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ikea. great value, very nice looking. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 01:32 PM Flag
[ - ] Onset of a UTI. I have a crazy week, but dr won't call in a prescription without seeing me. We have leftover amoxycillin suspension (DS's earache -- bottle is ten days old). How much should I take? Eight year old's ear ache prescription was one teaspoon every 12 hours -- I'm thinking a tablespoon, as I'm just under three times his weight. Yes, I know I should see a dr and will do as soon as I can, but need to get through this week. TIA. 7 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 01:15 PM Flag
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Go & get cyclamen from pharmacist. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 01:23 PM Flag
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that's non-prescription? is it over the counter, or do you have to ask for it? thx [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 01:27 PM Flag
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It's not an antibiotic, it's for the onset of a UTI, a cranberry & potassium concoction. Over the counter. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 01:31 PM Flag
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Why would you do this? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 01:26 PM Flag
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Please take care of your health first. Or your week could get even crazier. Please. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 01:28 PM Flag
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It's a UTI, not a gunshot wound. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 01:32 PM Flag
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First question, why did you not give your child all the medication that was prescribed to him? I am guessing what is left is not enough to knock out your UTI, medicine based on Weight. Go to a walk in clinic, it will take 10 minutes. If you are UWS the 69th is awesome. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 01:38 PM Flag
[ - ] What is the deal with the shoes with massive platforms? 5 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 01:11 PM Flag
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Love them - I feel like a giant wearing them - at 5'2" my head is in the clouds! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 01:17 PM Flag
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My favorite is platforms on Doc Martens - that Frankenstein look is so..... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 01:18 PM Flag
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they're on the way out. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 01:18 PM Flag
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You must be tall. If you were petite, you'd understand. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 01:20 PM Flag
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They came from the stripper/porn star industry and filtered into the mainstream. I see less of them now in online catalogs (thank goodness). [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 01:26 PM Flag
[ - ] Please help DH see the light. We are in the process of buying a home. Our HHI is $185K (base, not including bonuses) and we have steady jobs (Civil service for DH and I have JD/MBA). DH and I are disagreeing on a budget for new house. My bank pre-approved us for up to $600K yet DH REFUSES to even look at 4bdrm/2 bath homes priced at more than $500K. I have a rental property which has a tenant in there, and once we sells our current home (DH owns it), it will generate at least $80K profit plus the $250K downpayment DH has in the bank. I plan to kick in at least $20K toward closing costs, misc fees. We have no debt other than a mortgage on my rental property (I just paid off all my loans). DH wants to buy a $450K house with a $200K mortgage which is affordable but the houses in the $450-500K range in our desired area are complete crap! (Nassau county, LI). What do we do? DH doesn't want to budge but I think we can comfortably afford a $350K mortgage and a house priced at $550-600K. We have no DCs (yet). Advice ? 19 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 01:07 PM Flag
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How much are the property taxes on these houses? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 01:10 PM Flag
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My rental property is a condo in Queens. (1 bedroom). Taxes on our current home is $7K (we live in a crappy area so it's another reason we want to move, the school district is bad). We are comfortable with property taxes no more than $13K/yr. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 01:12 PM Flag
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The more expensive the house, the higher property taxes. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 01:14 PM Flag
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Go to lots of showings of disgusting houses in dh's price range. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 01:10 PM Flag
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We have. DH says he is fine with them! His standards are lower than mine. We need at least a 2 car garage since DH has 2 cars. He is happy with a 1 car garage and 1.5 bath but I am not. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 01:13 PM Flag
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Now you only have one choice - throw a hysterical fit and say you want what you want and you want it now. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 01:24 PM Flag
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I think it depends on the interest rate you get and the property taxes in the area. LI has very high taxes. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 01:12 PM Flag
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Remember that having dcs can cut your income since one of you has to stay home or you pay for ft childcare. I believe in not stretching unless you have to do so. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 01:13 PM Flag
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We wouldn't have daycare costs..both our parents are retired and would be helping out..hence why we are staying local. Also, no plans for DC for several years and if we do, it would only be one. (Actually I am on the fence about this anyway). [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 01:28 PM Flag
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A lot can happen in a few years, so I would not necessarily count on the grandparents to provide childcare. I agree with the OR that you need to factor the potential costs of children in your decision. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 01:29 PM Flag
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You can comfortably afford more, I don't really understand the fear of mortgage debt when if you buy a cheaper house young end up having to sink a ton of cash into it to make it nice, more money than you may see back when you sell, [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 01:10 PM Flag
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I agree! But DH is freaked out about debt in general. His parents grew up very poor so he always buys everything in cash, he never buys new cars and our current mortgage debt is $140K which is less than my mortgage on the rental property...I wish he would see the light! I don't see why we should shortchange ourselves on this issue. A house is a big investment and I'm willing to pay at the top end for something I love, not something I should settle for. -OP [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 01:22 PM Flag
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You married him knowing he has bag lady syndrome. What's more, you won't have the 250K savings in the bank if he's not so frugal! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 01:29 PM Flag
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Can you buy a "crap" house and renovate? As long as it's in a good area you can make any house look good. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 01:16 PM Flag
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Buy a trailer. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 01:18 PM Flag
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DH doesn't want a fixer upper and neither do I. The house we live in now was original,y a fixer upper and it was a ton of work! We would rather just move in and not have to budget for renovations, etc. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 01:19 PM Flag
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Are you sure he is allowed to live outside of the city if he is a civil servant? Not all agencies allow non-residents [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 01:27 PM Flag
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What town in Nassau are you looking? DH needs a finance class. Putting so much down with rates this low is not the wisest thing. You could easily buy more house, and if you plan on having kids, you'd be much better off buying bigger now, than having to upgrade later and pay closing costs all over again! Taxes in say Rockville Center or Garden City are HIGH HIGH. Even Hempstead has $11K takes and up. He needs to be smart about this. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 01:25 PM Flag
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Given your DH, I think you make a deal to rent a cheap place in your desired market for 3-4 years. If you save X$ -- say, $80-100K over four years and still have similar income and expenses, he agrees that you can handle the debt and you get to pick a house at up to $700K. Don't listen to those who say that renting is throwing money away; it's often not more expensive than buying and depends on the location. Don't buy a house you don't really like, expecting to move in four years -- the transaction costs on buy / selling/ moving are very high, not to mention the angst. Good luck! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 01:26 PM Flag
[ - ] Has anyone heard about rugjungle.com? They have the cutest educational rugs. All are made in the USA and are shipped free nationwide. 11 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 01:02 PM Flag
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Thanks Spamela, but my kids get their education at school. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 01:03 PM Flag
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That's what I used to think! Until one day I noticed my kid spending hours staring blankly at our cold, barren floors. She didn't appear to be in any particular distress--there was even an almost eery calm on her face. But I could tell her little brain was crying out for a more stimulating floor covering. Months passed, and I thought we'd never break the trance of those plain, boring, un-educational floors. I was afraid we'd lose her to the siren-song of our unadorned floors. I did some reading about floor-staring, and learned that we were not alone. Turns out thousands of kids--perhaps millions--fall asleep every night staring at a plain floor, while their little minds yearn for something to make their synapses fire. Then I got an idea: what if somehow I could use all of those hours of idle floor staring productively? What if, instead of a plain hardwood or berber floor, ours were bedazzled with all manner of bright colors and eye-catching, educational themes? Well, that dream has become reality. And it's all thanks to rugjungle.com! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 01:15 PM Flag
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lmao... this should be the ad for the site. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 01:26 PM Flag
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it is! I'm not just an ordinary spammy rug merchant. I'm a spammy rug merchant who'll do anything (within reason) to spread the gospel of rugjungle.com [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 01:25 PM Flag
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Try their sister company, bottomofthebowljungle.com. It takes those wasted moments between the end of the oatmeal and the next activity and turns them into a "teachable moment." Look out, China! Here we come! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 01:31 PM Flag
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Nothing like poisoning you kids with a cheap-ass rug that offgases. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 01:06 PM Flag
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Offgases? That's a great word! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 01:16 PM Flag
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some of them are fairly expensive-ass. but you get what you pay for. almost all are certified Green Label Plus, which means they are the lowest-emitting rugs on the market. (p.s. wouldn't it be "offsgas?") [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 01:27 PM Flag
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I just looked. They have the same rugs that every other online rug site has. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 01:31 PM Flag
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I actually bought a rug from them. They are good from a service perspective and the rug was really nice and affordable....I like that though SPAMALA....that is pretty funny. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 01:08 PM Flag
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"educational rugs" .... Sorry, that's all I've got [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 01:33 PM Flag
[ - ] i bought a dvf dress in size 4. is this a vanity size? 1 Reply [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 01:00 PM Flag
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Plus size [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 12:55 PM Flag
[ - ] We are interviewing for a new nanny and want to find someone who is exceptional, has a lot of experience and great references. I've found one we really like, she's educated, 10+ years of experience, three jobs in the last decade and a great reference from each. What's interesting to me is that she only charges $850/week take home, I'm surprised she hasn't increased her rate as her experience level has increased. I'm also wondering if she will just get settled in and then try to increase her rate and we'll get a sticker shock. Does anyone have any thoughts on this? TIA 15 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 12:55 PM Flag
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Offer her slightly more & see if you can circumvent that. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 12:57 PM Flag
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Thanks, we pay on the books and also offer healthcare of $200/month so I wasn't sure if the fact that we pay her taxes and healthcare would be enough. I'm just surprised she hasn't raised her salary requirement after so much time. Is this typical? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 12:59 PM Flag
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It could be. She may be basing her salary requirements on what she needs to live, not what the market will bear. (btw, kudos to you for your generous benefits and for paying on the books.) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 12:59 PM Flag
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OP - is this 'generous', I'm new to all of this. Should we withhold the health insurance until after a trial period? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 01:10 PM Flag
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what's the scope of the job? how many hours, how many kids, what are her responsibilities, etc? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 12:53 PM Flag
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We have one 6mo DC, 50 hours/week, nanny only as we have a cleaner who comes once a week. In prior jobs she has watched up to 3 kids. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 01:00 PM Flag
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Nanny here. $850 take home sounds about right... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 12:57 PM Flag
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Thanks, how long have you been a nanny? Do you ever raise your rates? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 01:13 PM Flag
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Actually, my credentials are quite similar to the candidate you're interviewing. I've been a nanny for 12 years, three families, all had three children. While I have raised my rates a little bit over time (based on experience), I base my rate mostly on the job demands. If I was going from a family with three kids, to a family with one child I certainly would not increase my rate. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 01:31 PM Flag
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Rates are based on number of kids and scope of job. That comes out to 17/hr for 1 baby - take home. You're way overpaying. Have had 3 nannies. Around 7-10 years of experience each. No, the rate does not go up meaningfully with experience. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 01:05 PM Flag
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Thanks for your perspective, this is our first time to hire a nanny. I have found that the pool is much smaller because we prefer to pay on the books, so it feels to me that we're paying the taxes because we want to, the nannies don't seem to value this either way. Other than that, why do you say I'm over paying? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 01:03 PM Flag
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Lol, only 850/week for 1 dc! UES mom here. If that's not too much for you, you won't experience sticker shock later. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 01:01 PM Flag
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OP - I'm starting to feel like a dummy! What is the norm and what is considered generous? We really need someone who's a professional, legal, happy and committed for the long term. I'd prefer to pay more for the right person but I don't want to be a sucker. I'm just surprised that everyone we've interviewed has said they want to take home about $800/week. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 01:12 PM Flag
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If you want to really add to the pot, buy here an unlimited transit card each month. Plus give her a house kitty of $250 a week (request receipts) so she can do nice activities with dc. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 01:12 PM Flag
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OK thanks. DC already goes to three classes a week and we have membership for the local libraries and zoo, we live in midtown. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 01:14 PM Flag
[ - ] I am so discouraged: have been working hard to lose weight (eating right, exercising regularly), and while I'm seeing results in how my clothes are starting to fit and looking more toned, my actual weight seems to be stagnating. :( 6 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 12:21 PM Flag
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why would you care more about a number than about how your body actually is? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 12:18 PM Flag
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OP: I guess because I know the weight I want to get back to (about 15 lbs lighter), and this is disheartening. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 12:27 PM Flag
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First of all, congratulations!! It sounds like you're building muscle, which weighs more than fat. Also, if you have lost a significant amount of weight already, you may now have to lower your daily calorie intake further to continue to see results. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 12:24 PM Flag
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So you are eating healthy food, exercise, your clothes fit better and you look toned. All that should make you very happy. Yet, you focus on one thing, the very thing, that means the least, a number. Love your healthy life. You go! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 12:26 PM Flag
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how long have you been doing it? Keep it up the good work! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 12:34 PM Flag
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size matters much more than weight, as pp have said. first, weight fluctuates constantly due to hormonal changes, water retention etc - you can go up and down 5 lbs around your period or after a salty meal, but that's not weight gain. second, muscle is heavy and dense, so a fit size 6 woman will weigh more than a less fit size 6 woman, and be much better off. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 01:06 PM Flag
[ - ] what do you think of a couple that never has sex? DH not interested? Affair? 9 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 12:10 PM Flag
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I think I should mind my own business. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 12:20 PM Flag
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Op are YOU the couple? I would think he is gay or having an affair. If he's older and you used to have a good sex life I might think depression. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 12:20 PM Flag
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Got the wrong girl I just really don't care what goes on in other people's bedrooms at all. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 12:28 PM Flag
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+1 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 12:26 PM Flag
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In our case, a chronic disease that requires medications that have terrible side effects. So I think we are doing our best under very tough circumstances. But thanks for your concern. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 12:28 PM Flag
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Well, that's us, so if you have a question, just ask. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 12:25 PM Flag
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np Us too. According to my dh, at least. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 12:32 PM Flag
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I would think they were more weird for telling me they're not having sex than for actually not having sex [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 12:36 PM Flag
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this, and a million possible reasons, none of which are any of my business and most of which have nothing to do with infidelity. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 01:13 PM Flag
[ - ] Would it give you pause if your 2 yo, who is just starting to talk said to you before nanny arrives, "no [nanny's name] today. She bad. I no like."? 7 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 12:10 PM Flag
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Is nanny coming so you can leave? That's probably more what DC doesn't like rather than the nanny herself. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 12:11 PM Flag
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+1 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 12:20 PM Flag
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Op: she said it right when she woke up. It's probably about me though. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 12:25 PM Flag
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your dc doesn't want you to leave [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 12:18 PM Flag
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When my DS was that age he used to call his nanny 'mom', it actually made me happy to know that he was spending so much time with someone who he felt so comfortable with. I do think it's normal that a 2yo prefers his mom to nanny but I'd ask other mothers or friends in your area for feedback on your nanny. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 12:30 PM Flag
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I'd take it as a sign that the child feels like they are losing the parental connection and is experiencing feelings of abandonment [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 12:32 PM Flag
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It's just DC's way of saying s/he loves you. My mom is staying with us while DH is out of town for work and 3yo DS came into bed with me this morning and said, "I want grandma to go to a hotel. I don't like her." This, about a woman who brought him two awesome toy cars and actually sits on the floor and plays with him (unlike me). [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 12:39 PM Flag
[ - ] Waterfall countertops: yay or nay? 7 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 12:00 PM Flag
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Link? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 11:55 AM Flag
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Marble? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 11:55 AM Flag
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whatever the material the countertops are, i guess. marble often. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 01:10 PM Flag
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Only if they don't have patterns that hide where you've spilled the canola oil. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 12:42 PM Flag
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hu? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 01:10 PM Flag
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Search "Canola Oil" - she may pass Lasanga Mom as the UB villain de jour. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 01:32 PM Flag
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Yay I like them and it adds interest. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 01:22 PM Flag
[ - ] Just woke up from a very sexy dream about a guy I work with. Didn't even realize I was attracted to him until now. Feel awkward!n 5 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 11:55 AM Flag
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Dreams are not literal. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 12:00 PM Flag
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This. I had same about a boss of mine a while back. I was not attracted to him irl. I did look at him a bit differently after that dream. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 12:02 PM Flag
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Op: thing is I woke up attracted to him. We're pretty close work friends --probably going to have to avoid him for a little while. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 12:28 PM Flag
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Are you both single? If so go for it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 12:28 PM Flag
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I'm separated w/ a dc. He's single... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 12:47 PM Flag
[ - ] Perhaps there is some truth to all this name stuff on UB, this am my 6yo DS called his brother a f*cking punk. I asked where he had heard it and he said a kid named Jaden in another class taught it to him. Fabulous. Now what are some good ways to get a 6yo who thinks cursing is funny to stop it? Ignore? Me telling not to say it just seems to make him say it more 7 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 11:55 AM Flag
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They do pick up stuff. I just say we don't curse. We never use that type of language. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 12:03 PM Flag
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Discipline that's how. Make him stand in the corner and then apologize to you and his brother. If he does it again kick him out if the house and say he can't live there anymore. He will stop. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 12:04 PM Flag
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mild soap on the tongue or pepper. flame away. it works. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 12:18 PM Flag
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First of all, you can acknowledge the truth. Cursing IS funny sometimes. And it makes you feel powerful when you feel angry and powerless. But it is a rude and inappropriate way of expressing your feelings. In our family, no matter how we FEEL, we ACT with respect and courtesy toward other people. Now, I want you to come up with 3 other ways you could have expressed how you feel in a positive, respectful way. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 12:31 PM Flag
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+1 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 12:38 PM Flag
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Jaden, what a fucking punk [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 12:35 PM Flag
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Call Jaden's parents a la A Christmas Story [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 12:39 PM Flag
[ - ] Anyone have a negative child? I had a big fight with my 10 yo this morning. I'm so tired of it. All he does is complain and say negative things about other people. I told him no one is going to want to be friends with him if he stays so negative. I feel so badly for saying that. Every morning we get into it. I'm guessing it's his personality? 25 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 11:52 AM Flag
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Pre-teen, be patient. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 11:49 AM Flag
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You don't sound so positive, either. Many people are naturally negative. If you keep fighting with him, I fail to see how that makes him a more positive person. Takes two to fight. If he says something negative, don't take it personally. Acknowledge his feelings and move on. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 11:51 AM Flag
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^^and that comment about friends is really mean. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 11:51 AM Flag
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op here: I know. I feel so bad. It just came out after he went on and on and he wouldn't go. This has been going on for some time. I finally said "great you were supposed to play with X today so now you don't have to I'm canceling it". He needs to learn. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 12:06 PM Flag
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op here: I am positive and I never say a bad word about my friends. It's a pet peeve of mine. I know I shouldn't have yelled. It's where I need help from you guys. I find it hard to ignore. He goes on and on and what he was saying never even happened. He has a negative filter. You're right though I did not keep my cool. I feel bad. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 11:59 AM Flag
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OR: It happens. "I am so sorry you feel that way. Now go get dressed." My DD turned negative and argumentative when she was really anxious, especially before a big day at school. It was a defense mechanism. I just tried really hard not to get sucked in. Another smile and nod situation. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 12:15 PM Flag
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THANK YOU. I never thought about it as a defense mechanism. I guess because that doesn't make sense to me. Ok. I will try really hard tomorrow morning. It's a morning thing. Thank you everyone. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 12:27 PM Flag
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omg, we must share a ds. I've given the usual spiel about looking for the positive, not ruining things for other people, etc but it is exhausting. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 12:02 PM Flag
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ps I do think/worry that for my ds is is a sign he is anxious and unhappy ... in large part it's obv his nature, but could your ds be having trouble at school? seems like this is the age where all the social crap hits the fan - cliques, bullies... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 11:57 AM Flag
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op again: yes you're right he is going through some 'fitting in' stuff at school. I think, I don't know, that he puts others down in the hope that other kids align with him. Which is so wrong and never works. But definitely self esteem stuff going on. Now I feel even worse about what I said. I'm the worst mom today. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 12:09 PM Flag
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no, you're not, constant negativity is exhausting, and it's also hard to worry about your kid and not know how to help! just keep talking with him, point out that you think he's great and that he will be more successful making friends by showing them his good traits and having fun than by being negative. invite friends over for playdates if you can. totally normal to experiment with teen attitude earlier these days (unfortunately) and this does seem to be the age where kids start to bully - he has probably seen put-downs work for other kids and is just trying it out. remind him how he'd feel if he heard a classmate saying something mean about him. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 12:19 PM Flag
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another thing I've done with my ds is institute a one-time rule. he can make any complaint once, then I've heard it and no need to repeat. if he goes on about how gross the food is or how annoying his siblings are, the conversation is over and he can leave the room. period. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 12:23 PM Flag
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np: Excellent rule. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 12:32 PM Flag
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NP I like this too, I'm stealing it! See, I knew UB was a productive use of my time ;) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 12:34 PM Flag
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Love that. I nominate you no tolerance mom. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 12:37 PM Flag
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or: I like it. thanks. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 01:13 PM Flag
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Op again: Thank you very much. You are wise. Now why can't I say what you just mentioned vs. yelling? I should not be allowed to talk until 7:00am. You really helped me. Thank you. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 12:36 PM Flag
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OMG you guys stop catastrophizing and STOP trying to solve your kids' problems!! When they say something negative, all they want is to be HEARD. Reflect their emotions back to them with support and empathy, then say, "What are you going to do about it?" or "Do you have any ideas of how to handle this?" or "That's a tough one..." and empower them to use their brains! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 12:34 PM Flag
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Also, pick a time when he is NOT on a negative rant to say, "You know, it seems you've been having some trouble with XYZ lately. And sometimes it's hard for me to hear. But if you ever just need to vent, or you want to brainstorm or run some ideas past me, I'm here." [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 12:36 PM Flag
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Let ds be who he is. Maybe he is a negative person - I have friends who are negative and most of them are spot in in their criticisms and also hilarious. Stop trying to make him be the person you want him to be. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 12:06 PM Flag
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Sorry but going through life talking about someone behind their back, whom you hung out with the day before is not cool in my book. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 12:10 PM Flag
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Then continue to insult your ds for not being who you want him to be. When he stops talking to you and closes himself off you will know why. Good job mom. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 12:22 PM Flag
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? I'm op and I didn't write the above comment. I agree with it in theory though. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 12:22 PM Flag
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And I agree with my comment so there you have it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 12:32 PM Flag
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np: To the person who wrote let the kid be. So you're saying you agree that it's ok to speak negatively about someone if that's who they are? No one really chooses this. It's low self esteem and insecurity that makes anyone criticize and put down another (sorry op). This is psych. 101 stuff here. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 12:39 PM Flag
[ - ] Ugh. Hd sex last night and just couldn't get off....dh tried oral and all the other tricks.....fml 1 Reply [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 11:45 AM Flag
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ok creepy old guy get off this board. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 11:52 AM Flag
[ - ] s/o BCP... I had to get Plan B because I've only been back on BCP for 4 days and the condom broke... Should I keep taking my regular BCP as normal? 7 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 11:41 AM Flag
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yes, keep taking your regular pills. Plan B is a big dose of progesterone, perfectly safe to combine with your regular pills. And take a pregnancy test in 2 weeks. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 12:21 PM Flag
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Are you an OB? Any tips on finding the right bcp? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 12:29 PM Flag
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I'm a NP who works in Gyn. The right pill is really very personal - they are all good for somebody, but one person may have a bunch of side effects that don't bother another person at all. When I prescribe I usually prefer to start with the lower dose estrogen pills that use levonorgestral as the progesterone, as that is a 2nd generation progesterone that is pretty well tolerated. Examples would be Lutera, Sronyx (these are generics, most insurers cover generics rather than brand unless there is a prior authorization.) That said, some people need a higher estrogen dose for good cycle control and in that case I like Levora (also generic.) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 12:40 PM Flag
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^^ to clarify, Levora still a "low dose" pill, but just a little big higher than the others which some people need to avoid mid-cycle spotting. All conventionally used pills are low dose these days. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 12:42 PM Flag
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OR - thank you for this thoughtful response. I take BCP to regulate my cycle as I suffer from wicked PMS, I go crazy for a week/month without it. I'm taking Loestrin 24 right now and I'm exhausted all the time and have zero sex drive. Other than trial & error, is there any reliable way to figure out which BCP would work best for me? Maybe a blood test to determine my basic estrogen and progesterone levels, or something like that? Before Loestrin I was taking Yasmim but I was always constipated. THANK YOU! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 12:52 PM Flag
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actually it was Yaz, not Yasmin that I was taking. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 12:53 PM Flag
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Hmm, am not aware of any sort of test that would guide us to one pill type or another (although I do basic Gyn, perhaps a reproductive endocrinologist would have ideas.) LoEstrin 24 is a very low dose pill, but I don't have a good explanation for you about the exhaustion side effect (I saw that post, was curious about it as I haven't heard this particular side effect in isolation before.) Def talk to your prescriber. In a situation like this I would probably switch the progestrone type and bump up the estrogen level a tad. Not a sure fix to the situation, but some people are really sensitive to the type of progesterone used and I'm guessing you might be one given how you felt on Yaz (which is yet another progesterone type.) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.21.13, 01:21 PM Flag
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