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05.18.13, 11:31 PM
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Very sorry. What does their ethnicity have to do with anything?
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05.18.13, 11:32 PM
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traditions that I would like to respect.
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05.18.13, 11:33 PM
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Just do what you would do for anyone else. Send food or a card or flowers.
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05.18.13, 11:27 PM
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A frozen meal, a card, flowers. A note of sympathy.
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05.18.13, 11:28 PM
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Is she elderly? Young? Young with dcs?
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05.18.13, 11:34 PM
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young with one dc.
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05.18.13, 11:35 PM
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np: How sad. I think a frozen meal would be a nice gesture.
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05.18.13, 11:35 PM
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Offer to babysit whenever she needs to, take her out to lunch and let her talk?
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05.18.13, 11:41 PM
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A gift card for a restaurant, offer to order in food for her a couple of nights, or also have her over a few times for pizza or something easy.
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05.18.13, 11:46 PM
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We're the Catholic? Get a Mass card ( a mass will be dedicated in his name)
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05.18.13, 11:39 PM
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05.18.13, 11:31 PM
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Who is we? Kids watching? Ages? Genres that you like? We need a bit more to go on.
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05.18.13, 11:36 PM
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Just DH and me. We like drama, action, comedy - The Sixth Sense, Fight Club, Inception, The Matrix, 40 Year Old Virgin, etc.
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05.18.13, 11:39 PM
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Abraham Lincoln, Vampire Hunter.
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05.18.13, 11:48 PM
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We've just started watching House of Cards - really good.
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05.18.13, 11:48 PM
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05.18.13, 11:26 PM
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+1
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05.18.13, 11:27 PM
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+1
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05.18.13, 11:27 PM
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+1
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05.18.13, 11:27 PM
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+1
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05.18.13, 11:27 PM
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No, they are employees. People don't put up with that classist bullshit anymore.
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05.18.13, 11:21 PM
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this
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05.18.13, 11:30 PM
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+1000000
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05.18.13, 11:47 PM
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Mine is an employee and a godsend.
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05.18.13, 11:46 PM
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Servants were employees too - they received a salary. Where did you grow up that you think servants are not employees?
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05.18.13, 11:53 PM
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Servants ARE employees
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05.18.13, 11:50 PM
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Until your DH leaves you for her
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05.18.13, 11:24 PM
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Lmao. Signed nanny. (Of course I would never do this, but I think is funny)
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05.18.13, 11:25 PM
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And your kids call her mommy
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05.18.13, 11:27 PM
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I'm a sahm and feel like a servant too.
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05.18.13, 11:33 PM
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Me too and I work.
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05.18.13, 11:47 PM
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My DH has better taste, he would never leave me for the help.
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05.18.13, 11:26 PM
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He might if you keep up with this attitude.
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05.18.13, 11:28 PM
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Sure
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05.18.13, 11:32 PM
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Well-bred moms say "household help" for governesses, tutors, nannies. Sometimes we let them join us at table.
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05.18.13, 11:37 PM
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No, they are paying for service.
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05.18.13, 11:38 PM
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Servants is an old fashioned term for household employees, IMO. Like secretaries are now called assistants, office managers, etc.
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05.18.13, 11:54 PM
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05.18.13, 11:25 PM
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Oh God. My DH is spending 6k and i was freaking out after seeing 35K I guess 6k is nothing.
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05.18.13, 11:27 PM
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Yep. Implant - $4K, crown for implant - $2200, etc, etc, etc
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05.18.13, 11:23 PM
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Yowza! I dont want to pay 400 to get 1 tooth and three wisdom teeth removed. I guess i should be lucky.
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05.18.13, 11:50 PM
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I couldn't agree more!!!
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05.18.13, 11:29 PM
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And remember - insurance is a joke.
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05.18.13, 11:27 PM
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So true. I most likely will need a dental implant this year. Really scared.
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05.18.13, 11:25 PM
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Me too I must go. Op how could it be $35K?
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05.18.13, 11:34 PM
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Implants, root canal, multiple crowns replaced, etc, etc
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05.18.13, 11:29 PM
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np-why do you need a dental implant? How much are these per tooth? TIA
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05.18.13, 11:30 PM
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in new york, around 6 -7 k including crown
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05.18.13, 11:31 PM
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dental insurance has been our best investment!
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05.18.13, 11:36 PM
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mine has a 3K annual cap
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05.18.13, 11:33 PM
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Dh just got an implant for around 3K at Tribeca Dental Dr. King was great, absolutely no pain, very professional and both his office and he called that evening. Great clean facility, nice staff.
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05.18.13, 11:39 PM
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3K including the crown?
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05.18.13, 11:34 PM
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What did you have done?
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05.18.13, 11:54 PM
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05.18.13, 11:23 PM
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I'm bad at math. does that work out? Babysitting 6 hours a week for a free membership. Tips? What? !!
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05.18.13, 11:19 PM
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Tell DH you need a bigger allowance
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05.18.13, 11:19 PM
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Tell him to make the kid do something around the house tomorrow.
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05.18.13, 11:20 PM
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You just gave $80 to four teenagers? I kind of agree with your DH.
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05.18.13, 11:29 PM
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I'm wondering why she gave the friends money.
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05.18.13, 11:37 PM
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So am I.
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05.18.13, 11:38 PM
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Well, probably you're both right. It's your money to give, but your DS could have a job at this point. Lawn work, starbucks, whatever.
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05.18.13, 11:37 PM
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We're millionaires
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05.18.13, 11:45 PM
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OP I didn't write that.
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05.18.13, 11:46 PM
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Also, I didn't say our DS doesn't have a job. He does. We require him to use his own money to buy his car and pay for gas. He's been delivering pizza ever since he's had his junior license. He just doesn't plan well when it comes to things like this. I guess I was wrong?
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05.18.13, 11:42 PM
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why did you give money to the friends?
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05.18.13, 11:42 PM
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Honestly? Because they said they weren't going to the show because they didn't have the money. They were totally sincere. So I gave them the money. I get paid in cash so my DH didn't necessarily need to know about it, but he sort of walked in on them thanking me.
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05.18.13, 11:49 PM
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Make him pay you back or work it off.
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05.18.13, 11:50 PM
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OR here. I think it's fine. You were encouraging him to support his classmates. Very nice. Don't over think.
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05.18.13, 11:51 PM
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So? Don't you want your kid to have a work ethic?
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05.18.13, 11:47 PM
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I feel bad for you if $80 gets your DH hot on your case.
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05.18.13, 11:51 PM
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05.18.13, 11:12 PM
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I know this is horrible, but conjoined twins give me nightmares. I have a very intense recurring nightmare about finding conjoined twins on the bus and realizing they are mine.
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05.18.13, 11:19 PM
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05.18.13, 11:10 PM
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Oh god, mine were late. 3's.
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05.18.13, 11:12 PM
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Mine too. Wait as long as possible and it's so easy.
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05.18.13, 11:30 PM
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I waited until child was ready and found it incredibly easy.
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05.18.13, 11:39 PM
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Right at 3rd birthday days, but in pullups at night until 5.
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05.18.13, 11:13 PM
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Ds1 was fully potty trained a couple of months before his third birthday, and ds2 took a longer time, from about 2.5 to 3.5 ( whe he was fully potty trained).
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05.18.13, 11:14 PM
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5, and even then there were night spills until 3rd-4th grade.
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05.18.13, 11:15 PM
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my teenagers still miss the toilet
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05.18.13, 11:27 PM
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Lol....I fear this will be us!
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05.18.13, 11:41 PM
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Two for day, waiting for night still at 4
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05.18.13, 11:31 PM
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2 yrs, 5 mos.
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05.18.13, 11:32 PM
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First kid 4.5. Second kid a little before third bday
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05.18.13, 11:30 PM
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4.5? Wasn't he embarrassed?
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05.18.13, 11:41 PM
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3.3 for everything, day and night.
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05.18.13, 11:38 PM
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05.18.13, 11:02 PM
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Wouldn't it be healthier to try and get over this?
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05.18.13, 11:03 PM
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Yeah, I'm in therapy. But until I get there I can not have any non family sitting on my toilet seat. But it is healthy to not hide from your phobias and be honest about them. Yes, I will be healthier once my phobia is in remission. If you know some overnight therapy that will work, let me know.
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05.18.13, 11:05 PM
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I'm glad you are working on it. This bathroom thing must be a rich people thing, I only have one bathroom and can't imagine telling someone they couldn't use it. I would feel incredibly mean and rude.
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05.18.13, 11:08 PM
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Does the nanny leave the children alone, or drag them along to poop/pee?
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05.18.13, 11:22 PM
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Yes, and the nanny has to either leave the kids in the hallway or bring them inside the bathroom with her while she is pooing. and Op is totally fine with this.
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05.18.13, 11:28 PM
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No big deal.
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05.18.13, 11:11 PM
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Do you never have guests over?
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05.18.13, 11:07 PM
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I'm sorry about your condition, but also kind of fascinated by it. Do you never leave home for more than an hour or two? How do you handle it when you need to go to the bathroom somewhere, anywhere, that is not your home? Can you just turn your phobia off for long enough to get the job done?
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05.18.13, 11:11 PM
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Sorry, faker, but this is not the functional equivalent of OP's post. She has a perfectly accessible guest bathroom, so it is strange that anyone other than she or her husband would use the master bathroom. People who only have one bathroom are prepared for sharing.
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05.18.13, 11:14 PM
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She doesn't let her kids use her bathroom. Also she seems fine with the nanny cleaning her bathroom. OP is nuts
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05.18.13, 11:18 PM
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And nasty.
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05.18.13, 11:20 PM
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This. The nanny can enter the sacred master domain to scrub the mistress' shit and blood out of the toliet, but god forbid she pee in it.
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05.18.13, 11:23 PM
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LOL.
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05.18.13, 11:25 PM
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I don't my kids use my bathroom. But you have a point about the cleaning -- if the nanny is expected to go in there to clean it, she certainly can use it in my book. I thought bathroom cleaning was outside of the job description of Nyc nannies.
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05.18.13, 11:27 PM
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Curious, why don't you let your kids use it?
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05.18.13, 11:28 PM
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They have their own bathroom, and I think it's important that they learn to respect other people's privacy. I don't think kids need to have access to every part of my life, or my house. I want a zone of privacy, and think I deserve it.
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05.18.13, 11:39 PM
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Op hire some Mexican undocumented immigrant to do the job. Documented nannies wouldn't put up with this Op.
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05.18.13, 11:28 PM
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Of course she does. She can't afford a second bathroom, do you think she can afford to pay a decent salary?
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05.18.13, 11:31 PM
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She doesn't let her OWN kids to use it. Still she entrust the nanny to take care of her OWN kids but worries more about a toilet. Yes, she has issues.
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05.18.13, 11:23 PM
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So they take your kid to the bathroom with them or leave them alone?
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05.18.13, 11:30 PM
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You do realize that they nod and smile then pee in your juice and other frig items, right?
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05.18.13, 11:48 PM
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05.18.13, 10:47 PM
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Because they're insecure about their nanny being prettier/younger/a better caregiver, etc. etc. etc.
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05.18.13, 10:44 PM
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I don't think many people do. I think some moms feel threatened/ambivalent about having a nanny in the first place, though.
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05.18.13, 10:50 PM
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I think some moms have a weird guilt complex about leaving their kids so they take it out on the nanny. It's really stupid and counter productive.
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05.18.13, 10:45 PM
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I do, too. Healthy moms are glad for the help.
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05.18.13, 10:57 PM
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I agree with this. The women I know who badmouth their nannies or nannies in general are miserable in most aspects of their life. I think some people also hire the cheapest they can get and get what they pay for.
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05.18.13, 10:59 PM
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Because it is easy
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05.18.13, 10:47 PM
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They are snobs, racists or both.
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05.18.13, 11:10 PM
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Nannies are fine. It's the moms who are nuts.
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05.18.13, 11:27 PM
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YES.
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05.18.13, 11:23 PM
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Control freaks. The idea of someone in their home with their kids, unsupervised, makes them insane.
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05.18.13, 11:33 PM
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Aha!!! that's it! Guilty control freaks.
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05.18.13, 11:49 PM
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05.18.13, 10:45 PM
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Actually we did not - I thought it would have been a lacrosse player from the brother fraternity of the sorority house it happened at
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05.18.13, 10:47 PM
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We thought it would be someone vile, such as yourself
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05.18.13, 10:57 PM
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nah that would be date rape.
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05.18.13, 11:28 PM
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No. Not really.
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05.18.13, 11:30 PM
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Yes we all know that black and hispanic men commit 90 percent of the rapes. But it is unspeakable for you to point this out. You are clearly a nokd low class white mom for pointing this out
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05.18.13, 10:47 PM
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Only poor low class whites talk about black crime. Which are you... Poor or low class? Lol.
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05.18.13, 10:48 PM
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Wonderful response.
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05.18.13, 10:49 PM
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+1
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05.18.13, 10:52 PM
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I'm going with both.
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05.18.13, 10:52 PM
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You know if the police hadn't come he would have been raping all those girls.
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05.18.13, 10:51 PM
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Yes you know that. ALL of them.
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05.18.13, 10:52 PM
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That is why wealthy whites buy apartments for daughters in white neighborhoods. Do the math it is low class whites that are raped by blacks, not wealthy whites.
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05.18.13, 10:58 PM
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OMG!
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05.18.13, 10:58 PM
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I know right? Crazy pants.
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05.18.13, 11:00 PM
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Lol. It is just like high school, social competition. Rich liberal moms take the side of the black rapists when blacks rape low class whites. The blacks are just pawns in the status competition among different white moms.
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05.18.13, 11:06 PM
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Do you smoke crack? What the fuck are you talking about?
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05.18.13, 11:02 PM
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Why do you think it is that wealthy liberal moms want forced busing so low class white moms have to send their daughters to school with boys from the housing projects? Look at the motivation
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05.18.13, 11:08 PM
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Look it up. The white victims of black crime are overwhelmingly low class whites.
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05.18.13, 11:09 PM
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You're back,huh?
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05.18.13, 11:04 PM
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Nypd has full report on who the perpetrators of violent crime are in manhattan. Not hard to get the report
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05.18.13, 11:11 PM
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That would be a "yes, (s)he is back"
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05.18.13, 11:07 PM
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Such a joy. I think it's a man.
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05.18.13, 11:11 PM
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And collapse this whole thread. You all revolt me
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05.18.13, 11:12 PM
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Cooolllaappsssee.
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05.18.13, 11:27 PM
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So sad. This is what happens when whites live in black neighborhoods.
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05.18.13, 11:27 PM
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5 Replies
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05.18.13, 10:40 PM
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Yes- normal
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05.18.13, 10:43 PM
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Yes
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05.18.13, 10:54 PM
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Yep. I hated my high school, too, but I was holding back tears the day I graduated. And when I transferred my sophomore year of college I was sad to leave. I doubt he's having regrets, just nervous for what the future holds.
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05.18.13, 10:50 PM
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It's normal and it's about the friendships.
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05.18.13, 10:59 PM
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Obviously, you think it is the best option, or he would not be doing it. Just keep reinforcing all the positive reasons why the decision was made. It will all work out.
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05.18.13, 10:56 PM
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05.18.13, 10:39 PM
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Who?
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05.18.13, 10:35 PM
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I don't know who you are talking about. is this something in the news?
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05.18.13, 10:43 PM
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Double who?
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05.18.13, 10:39 PM
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You've lost me.
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05.18.13, 10:44 PM
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Who?
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05.18.13, 10:55 PM
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I do. I now want to get the link to that video when the one decided she wanted to change her name to Reba and become a country singer. I was watching that Matt Damon/Greg Kinnear movie stuck on you when the credits rolled, and I was like where have I heard that song?? It was Reba's song! Or whichever one decided to call herself Reba. It's all so mixed up to me.
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05.18.13, 11:04 PM
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It doesn't get less mixed up when the one in the chair who decided she wanted to have a singing career and changed her name to Reba (and had people backing that video linked above) then later also decided she wanted to live "as a man." Also, the one who pushes around her sister/brother's chair has also said she's not a virgin. Your mind can go for days.
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05.18.13, 11:09 PM
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Huh?
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05.18.13, 10:58 PM
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The Schapell conjoined twins
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05.18.13, 11:19 PM
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Holy the *%$$%@ that is some shit. Thanks for posting.
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05.18.13, 11:51 PM
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05.18.13, 10:38 PM
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Target.
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05.18.13, 10:41 PM
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Agreed
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05.18.13, 10:45 PM
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They have plenty of cute stuff and it is pretty easy to put it together to look any way you want.
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05.18.13, 10:48 PM
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WALMART
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05.18.13, 10:50 PM
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Haven't been in one of those for at least a decade. Own the stock though!
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05.18.13, 10:45 PM
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pardon me, Muffy
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05.18.13, 10:46 PM
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Walmart sucks. Trash.
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05.18.13, 11:28 PM
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Vineyard Vines. Crew Cuts sucks.
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05.18.13, 10:51 PM
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Neither
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05.18.13, 10:55 PM
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Neither.
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05.18.13, 11:00 PM
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crew cuts. vineyard vines is too fuddy.
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05.18.13, 11:01 PM
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