The three most important physical features for females to have -- thigh gap, an upturned nose, and pretty feet.
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04.03.14, 02:49 AM
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Get a life
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04.03.14, 02:33 AM
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You're insane. Guys care about tits, ass, and legs. Upturned nose wtf?
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04.03.14, 02:49 AM
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this!!
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04.03.14, 02:52 AM
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This. My dh, who never notices anything physically, went crazy last week when I got a spray tan and wore a great dress and heels to dinner. The legs got him.
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04.03.14, 02:52 AM
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Only little boys and low-class men are into breasts. Ass is definitely important, and a thigh gap really makes the ass pop. Legs are pretty important.
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04.03.14, 02:57 AM
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I will tell me $2mm a year hedge fund DH from a prominent family that my natural 32DDs make him low class. He will love that.
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04.03.14, 02:58 AM
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Funny I make $$$ and I have 32DDD naturally. Hopefully you are not relying on just your jugs for an income.
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04.03.14, 02:47 AM
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My jugs plus my work ethic got me everywhere.
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04.03.14, 03:33 PM
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Enjoy them while you can. Gravity is a bitch.
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04.03.14, 04:07 PM
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Are you?
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04.03.14, 04:32 PM
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Oh please. I'm as far from gay as they come and even I can appreciate a nice pair of tits.
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04.03.14, 02:58 AM
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A high-value man might one-night-stand Tits McGee, but he sure as hell ain't bringing her home to mom.
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04.03.14, 03:03 AM
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it sounds like your entire goal in life is attracting a "high value man" whatever that means. are we UBing like it's 1805?
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04.03.14, 02:48 AM
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Attracting a high value man has been the primary objective of all women since women were invented. It's not going to change, sweetie.
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04.03.14, 03:15 AM
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lmfao
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04.03.14, 03:00 AM
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Invented?
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04.03.14, 03:01 AM
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yes, you godless heathen
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04.03.14, 09:23 PM
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Lol I'm a 36D married to a man worth over $250 mm, but hat ever helps you sleep at night dear.
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04.03.14, 02:48 AM
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You married one of the men from Duck Dynasty?
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04.03.14, 03:06 AM
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Ha. Nice try. No, he's an IB.
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04.03.14, 02:52 AM
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Sure you are
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04.03.14, 02:51 AM
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Hi Op!
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04.03.14, 02:52 AM
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I don't mean to shatter your brilliance but a woman can be intelligent, refined, elegant, AND have breasts.
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04.03.14, 01:26 PM
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LOL, OK
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04.03.14, 02:43 AM
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Wrong. Just about ALL men love breasts. Difference between nice breasts and fake stripper boobs.
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04.03.14, 01:09 PM
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happily- there are boob men, ass men, leg men, hip men, ETC. Otherwise most of us ladies would be single.
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04.03.14, 03:13 PM
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You sound anal retentive.
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04.03.14, 02:34 AM
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An upturned nose sounds awful.
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04.03.14, 02:34 AM
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Sounds very "Bewitched" to me. I can imagine some stuffy woman named Muffin on the UES twitching her nose and casting spells on the evil sahms with the great nannies.
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04.03.14, 02:53 AM
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It sounds like all the long island girls in the 80s and their terrible nose jobs
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04.03.14, 02:58 AM
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+1. Nassau County?
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04.03.14, 03:52 PM
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Freak, thigh gap is just stupid
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04.03.14, 02:50 AM
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Thigh gap is ugly.
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04.03.14, 03:56 AM
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Feet?? I'm sure a nice set of boobs beats that.
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04.03.14, 02:34 AM
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no. boobs turn to shit with age. most men of means prefer smaller breasts, which are classier.
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04.03.14, 02:39 AM
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You keep insisting this, yet no man agrees
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04.03.14, 02:59 AM
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op is clearly asian with small boobs and small feet.
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04.03.14, 02:43 AM
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And I'm sure you've noticed the trend of high-value white man marrying Asian women. There's a reason for that...
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04.03.14, 03:16 AM
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I knew it was you, crazy Asian Zuck mom! I have a serious question -- are you also one of the self-diagnosed "Aspies?" It's all starting to come together.
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04.03.14, 03:05 AM
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Yes the reason is they think the Asian women will make these tiny nebbishy men look and feel physically more powerful, as they are insecure. You don't see 6'2 guys with Asian women, they are with the brunette and blonde caucasian beauties
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04.03.14, 03:07 AM
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This is a very good point! The high-value males can pull a classy gorgeous white woman. It's only the low-value males who settle for Asian women.
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04.03.14, 09:18 PM
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Yeah Woody Allen is real low-value.
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04.03.14, 09:34 PM
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You mean like 80 year old Richard Murdoch with 40 year old Asian whatever Deng? Oooooooooh she prostituted herself out to an old guy. Yay her. She had to suck really gross old #$@! to get her money. What a role model.
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04.03.14, 03:09 AM
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left tit, right tit, cooter
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04.03.14, 02:51 AM
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haha
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04.03.14, 02:52 AM
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You forgot ass
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04.03.14, 02:59 AM
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That is the beginning and the end of what my husband sees on me. He likes my tits nd long blonde hair but my ass (which is a little too big, frankly) turns him into a cartoon wolf.
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04.03.14, 03:58 AM
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When someone has an upturned nose, can't you always see into the nostrils???
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04.03.14, 02:35 AM
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Just a slight upturn is all that is needed to be attractive.
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04.03.14, 03:03 AM
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No man ever cares or cared about thigh gap.
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04.03.14, 02:51 AM
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they may not have it mentally labeled as "thigh gap", but the look of two skinny legs with a space in between highlights the pelvic area and drives men crazy
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04.03.14, 02:38 AM
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No, you are sooooo wrong
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04.03.14, 02:56 AM
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Eye roll, troll. First of all, are we saying that the Chive readers are "High value"? Second, as we told you last time you posted this, most of those girls do not even have true tigh gaps.
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04.03.14, 02:50 AM
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I know doctors, IBs and other high-finance types who go to Chive events in the city.
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04.03.14, 03:04 AM
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Well, I have an IB at home and bunions on my feet, so...
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04.03.14, 03:26 AM
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I know doctors who are "low value" lol
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01.09.16, 03:01 PM
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those girls look tres trashy. I doubt they will ever get a 'high earner' longer than a few hours
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04.03.14, 03:06 AM
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hooker selfies.
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04.03.14, 01:52 PM
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lmao! The cuckoo's nest is missing a member tonight.
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04.03.14, 02:43 AM
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These are the biggest "have/have not" features for women that men are most strongly attracted to. The long leg/thigh-gap combo drives men mad with sexual lust. While pretty faces can vary, a small, upturned nose is the common bond that ties them together. Finally, pretty feet with proportioned toes signal femininity and form the perfect package.
A woman all 3 of these will be locked down earliest by a high-value man. Most desirable men want at least 2 out of 3. Pity the poor woman who has none, for she will not marry well.
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04.03.14, 02:37 AM
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LOL I'm sure you're single with this mentality.
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04.03.14, 02:39 AM
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lmao this
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04.03.14, 02:40 AM
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I can't believe you even took the time to write this.
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04.03.14, 02:42 AM
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x1000
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04.03.14, 02:42 AM
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You know you're crazy, right?
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04.03.14, 02:53 AM
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hoping this is satire.
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04.03.14, 03:14 AM
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It's a troll, no worries.
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04.03.14, 02:59 AM
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No, this is 100% honesty. Look at the types of women that high-value men marry, you will see they all have the 3 key features.
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04.03.14, 03:05 AM
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Oh dear, how many of this features do you have?
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04.03.14, 03:29 AM
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This is absolutely not true. I have none of these things. I wear a size 11 shoe (though my foot is in proportion), my nose is average to large, and my legs havent had a gap since college. My husband loves me and thinks I'm totally hot, but he loves my tits and ass.
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04.03.14, 06:27 AM
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You sound like an Asian escort.
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04.03.14, 11:27 AM
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Those are things women care about. You're projecting.
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04.03.14, 02:53 AM
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This. Upturned nose, wtf?
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04.03.14, 02:41 AM
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Ridiculous reductive female bashing
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04.03.14, 02:38 AM
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Said no guy ever!
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04.03.14, 02:54 AM
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Indeed!
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04.03.14, 03:00 AM
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+
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04.03.14, 03:00 AM
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Ridiculous. From somebody with an upturned nose, pretty feet and a thigh gap...yet a bit overweight/flabby, under-eye issues, post-dc horrid belly flab, etc.
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04.03.14, 03:05 AM
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What does your DH do?
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04.03.14, 03:06 AM
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There is something mentally wrong with you. Seek help.
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04.03.14, 02:51 AM
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OR: What? I have an upturned nose, pretty feet, and a thigh gap (which is determined by skeleton size, and I am maybe 10 lbs overweight, not super-fat). How does what I look like make anything wrong with me? Just saying these features can occur on many people.
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04.03.14, 03:10 AM
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I was referring to the lady who asked what your DH does.
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04.03.14, 02:55 AM
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OH; ha. I am divorced. And, you know, that makes sense since nobody would ever be married to anybody who is not a Barbie doll ;)
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04.03.14, 02:56 AM
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I am fat, straight nose, and the ugliest feet you will ever see. Seriously, my feet could scare small children. DH makes 700k and I make 400k.
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04.03.14, 02:52 AM
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^^Oh and my naturally huge tits are my best feature (38DDD)
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04.03.14, 02:52 AM
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Gross. How overweight are you?
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04.04.14, 04:03 PM
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But do you have a thigh gap?
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04.03.14, 02:53 AM
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Not even remotely. I have to put baby powder on my inner thighs in summertime
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04.03.14, 02:54 AM
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np: Jealous of your 38DDDs! signed, 36AA or AAA mom.Oh, and your 400k earning power :)
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04.03.14, 02:57 AM
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ILY
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04.03.14, 03:15 AM
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+1 OR, can we be friends? I'm you.
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04.03.14, 03:13 AM
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Good thing you make your own money...you're gonna need it someday.
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04.03.14, 03:13 AM
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NP. lol, because women with thigh gaps and pretty feet never get divorced? sweetie...get real.
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04.03.14, 02:58 AM
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Women with the 3 key features keep their men physically interested, which leads to less divorce.
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04.03.14, 03:06 AM
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lol, link? you're hilarious.
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04.03.14, 03:07 AM
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You are silly.
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04.03.14, 03:59 AM
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If what's keeping your man interested is thigh gap, an upturned nose and pretty feet, you either married an imbecile or you don't have the marital security you think you have.
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04.03.14, 03:15 AM
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Yep
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04.03.14, 03:22 AM
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So is everyone married to a 'high earner" who "wants" a "thigh gap" and an "upturned nose." Because that superficiality calls for a new wife every 15-20 years, dear
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04.03.14, 03:01 AM
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THIS
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04.03.14, 03:01 AM
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+1. And that kind of divorce rate calls for an air tight prenup.
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04.03.14, 03:02 AM
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Jealous of your nose. Not happy with mine.
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04.03.14, 03:31 AM
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I love you! (and my feet are probably uglier than yours).
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04.03.14, 02:03 PM
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The good news is that most women can obtain a thigh-gap through proper diet/exercise, and an upturned nose through surgery. These 2 features will enable them to marry well.
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04.03.14, 03:11 AM
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Not true. I weigh 115 and don't have a true thigh gap. My hips are just positioned too close
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04.03.14, 03:31 AM
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Does this mean you are more likely to need a c section? np
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04.03.14, 03:18 AM
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Great. A plastic surgeons PSA
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04.03.14, 03:34 AM
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My feet are terrible -- too big with bunions, my thighs are biggish -- definitely no gap, pear here, my nose is OK -- not upturned at all but not crooked or hooked. I feel sad.
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04.03.14, 03:28 AM
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wtf
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04.03.14, 03:15 AM
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This is a troll, don't feel sad
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04.03.14, 03:31 AM
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If this nonsense makes you feel sad (instead of making you laugh), you need a self esteem reboot. Stat.
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04.03.14, 03:18 AM
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x1000
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04.03.14, 03:22 AM
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well...just don't expect to marry an impressive man. otherwise you'll be fine.
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04.03.14, 04:05 AM
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What on earth (I'm sure I will be sorry I asked) is a thigh gap?
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04.03.14, 03:29 AM
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google is your friend
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04.03.14, 03:19 AM
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So you don't know then....
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04.03.14, 05:01 PM
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Three strikes for me.
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04.03.14, 03:16 AM
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LMFAOOOOO
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04.03.14, 03:22 AM
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DING DING DING We have a winner!!!
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04.03.14, 05:54 PM
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Thigh gap? Lmao!
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04.03.14, 03:22 AM
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Straight man here: This is probably the dumbest thing I've read on this site--and that's saying something. The OP's comments reveal that not only has she never met a man, she's probably never even seen a picture of one. Let me do the male equivalent of the first post: the most important features for a man to have--hard knee-caps, medium arches, and an elegant uvula.
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04.03.14, 03:50 AM
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lolol
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04.03.14, 03:56 AM
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Lol!
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04.03.14, 04:24 AM
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OP is going to tell you that you must not be Hugh value, FYI
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04.03.14, 04:24 AM
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Wrong.
A similar comparison to men would be:
six-pack (comparable to thigh-gap in women)
square jaw (comparable to upturned nose)
muscular forearms (comparable to nice feet)
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04.03.14, 04:26 AM
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How are these things comparable?
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04.03.14, 12:20 PM
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Men look at the pelvic regions of women all the time. That is highlighted by thigh-gap.
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04.03.14, 08:44 PM
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Still the straight guy: We're not looking at the thigh gap, sorry to break it to you. Also, when you see a guy staring at a woman's chest, he's not looking admiring her clavicles. (I really hope this isn't a fake. I hope there is a woman out there imagining that her life will be easy and rewarding because she has bitchin' feet.)
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04.03.14, 09:50 PM
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If you don't look at the pelvic region of a women, you are gay. Even if you check out a girls ass, you are looking at her thigh-gap region. And when you you see a small ass atop two skinny legs with a space in the middle, your penis gets hard. Much harder than it would if you saw two thighs rubbing against each other.
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04.04.14, 06:04 AM
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Do you realize that thigh gap is an optical illusion making one's hips appear wider and that the hip width is what is considered desirable preprogrammed in hetero men genes.
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04.03.14, 09:54 PM
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I understand this. But the illusion still drives men crazy.
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04.04.14, 05:49 AM
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My point is that no guy, aside from weird fetishists, is sitting on a beach scoping out the thigh gaps and feet of women. (Personally, I really like girls with nice noses, but I'm probably an oddity. Also, nice nose doesn't just = upturned.) Do you know any men?
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04.03.14, 08:24 PM
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Lol
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04.03.14, 05:53 AM
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Hardest I've ever laughed on UB.
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04.03.14, 09:49 AM
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That was funny.
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04.03.14, 12:02 PM
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Bahahahaha
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04.03.14, 01:32 PM
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It is a male troll. No woman posts using the word females.
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04.03.14, 06:51 AM
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+1
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04.03.14, 12:41 PM
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As a guy I like your 3 choices.......a lot. Woman think getting a glance or a smile means a lot. Guys give out lots of those every day. If you show your cleavage you will get interest, but from who. If you have the above 3, and the rest is nice too, you are in a pretty exclusive league.
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04.03.14, 01:40 PM
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You and the OP are made for each other.
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04.03.14, 04:09 PM
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(Even if you're a man, you're not a man...)
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04.03.14, 08:26 PM
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Precisely. Those 3 are what refined men seek out. They are the hallmarks of true feminine beauty.
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04.03.14, 08:45 PM
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So would bad skin, bad hair and a wretched personality compromise the value of the those features?
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04.03.14, 05:10 PM
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You mean, that if a woman has a fugly face, it doesn't matter as long as she can fly a baseball between her legs, has a pug nose and her feet don't look like claws?
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04.03.14, 07:41 PM
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LOL
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04.03.14, 07:33 PM
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Yes, but more like a football. In fact, let's be honest about what the true standards of beauty are here. First, you need to be able to float a frisbee through those those pin like legs. Noses are declasse, no one has those anymore. An ideal woman actually has her entire nose removed and leaving two elegant slits on her face, a la Voldemort. It's no coincidence that Voldemort was a racial purist after all! And you are all totally wrong about the feet. Truly refined women have their foot bones fused into perfectly pointed Louboutin-shaped molds. Flats are for poor people.
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04.03.14, 08:32 PM
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in this order: not overweight, pretty face, ass, tits, legs, skin
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04.03.14, 07:35 PM
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This is all subjective stuff. The OP has clearly defined 3 precise things, things than can be measured. If you want to offer an alternate list, you will need to be more precise.
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04.03.14, 08:34 PM
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Of course! Ideally you should be able to pass a baseball between your legs. In fact, let's be honest about what the true standards of beauty are here. First, you need to be able to float a frisbee through those those pin like legs. Noses are declasse, no one has those anymore. An ideal woman actually has her entire nose removed and leaving two elegant slits on her face, a la Voldemort. It's no coincidence that Voldemort was a racial purist after all! And you are all totally wrong about the feet. Truly refined women have their foot bones fused into perfectly pointed Louboutin-shaped molds. Flats are for poor people.
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04.03.14, 08:49 PM
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Actually, high heels should only be worn on special occasions. Women who wear heels all the time are trashy and insecure.
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04.03.14, 09:18 PM
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Umm that was satire. I think it flew over your head
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04.03.14, 09:32 PM
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I chose to ignore it, dear.
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04.03.14, 09:32 PM
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Thigh gap is an optical illusion making one's hips appear wider, and as a result more desirable for breeding. Hips appear wider, because thighs are thin in relation. But the true determination of fertile curves is the hip to waist ratio, when you have a good hip to waist ratio, thigh gap is irrelevant.
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04.03.14, 10:11 PM
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Fair enough, but a thigh gap just provides that visual OOMPH that makes every man feel like a king.
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04.03.14, 10:03 PM
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This has been the craziest thread I've read on here (and other "mommy" type blogs) ever. Troll on, you magnificent bastard, you!
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04.04.14, 01:20 AM
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