i am thinking about having another baby. but i am 40. i know lots of women have babies in their 40s. but i am worried - not about birth defects (although maybe i should be ) - i am worried about being 60 when (s)he is only 20...etc...
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02.01.13, 02:14 AM
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40's not old. Get over it.
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02.01.13, 02:20 AM
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This.
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02.01.13, 02:20 AM
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op: yes but 60 is and 20 is not - and 70 is but 30 is not. i would have had a hard time if my mom passed away when i was only 30. she would have missed my wedding and children...
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02.01.13, 02:21 AM
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and my friend lost her mom to diabetes when she was 8.
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02.01.13, 02:23 AM
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ok. but i can not have a baby and avoid it all
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02.01.13, 02:25 AM
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You don't sound like you want one.
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02.01.13, 02:24 AM
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i waiver - i admit that. my other two are older and very self-sufficient/independent. i want another and then get scared i won't be able to handle it all. and then think about my age.
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02.01.13, 02:28 AM
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Ugh. It's waver. np
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02.01.13, 02:28 AM
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Ugh, fine. Then just quit.
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02.01.13, 02:23 AM
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I am in the same situation and wonder if I sh do it so my son has a sibling after I am gone... It's tough..wish I'd done it younger... Sigh..
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02.01.13, 02:24 AM
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People lose their parents much earlier and survive. Take care of yourself and you're likely to live to 85+
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02.01.13, 03:08 AM
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What in particular worries you about that? Is it financial or more like a fear that you won't be able to "keep up" or worry that something will happen to you?
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02.01.13, 02:20 AM
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i think its the fear that i won't be able to keep up and that i will die when (s)he is young (which i know could happen regardless of my age)
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02.01.13, 02:25 AM
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How old is DH?
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02.01.13, 02:24 AM
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37
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02.01.13, 02:28 AM
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Do it now if you want to. I had got preg easily at 39, then 3 miscarriages in 3 yrs.
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02.01.13, 02:24 AM
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I know you want to hear that it's the norm. Yes, lots of people have babies in their 40s but it's not ideal. Nature gave us periods around 13 for a reason. The ideal age to have a child is 19.Nature doesn't care about careers,just continuing the species.Education, longevity etc. has changed that.But 19 is still the ideal age.But do what you want, a 25 yr. old mom can die.It's a crap shoot. But would I rather have a younger mom, probably.
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02.01.13, 02:30 AM
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Ok, from an MD mom's perspective - teenagers have a higher risk of dangerous high blood pressure, eclampsia, and a whole bunch of other conditions during pregnancy. Not to mention the risk of not getting adequate prenatal care. Puberty is starting earlier and earlier, but please tell your DD's to wait until their early 20's, at least.
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02.01.13, 02:46 AM
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As the 50+ yo daughter of a mother who had me in her 40s, growing up, the age of my parents was a total non-event. It's only a big deal if you let other people tell you it is.
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02.01.13, 02:39 AM
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Depends on the kind of mom you are. If you have lots of $$$ and time and self discipline you will be a young vibrant 60 barring a random catastrophe. I like to drink in the evenings and not much discipline. 2DC in TT private. Work FT. No 3rd DC for me.
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02.01.13, 02:52 AM
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look at your own mother at 60 and you will have an idea what you will be like :)
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02.01.13, 02:53 AM
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this worries me too. but such an imponderable. lost my dad as a child, he was barely 40. dh has lost both his parents in his 40s, and they had him in early 20s. really no guarantees, so do what you really want to on this.
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02.01.13, 03:41 AM
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Had my last dc at 44. Honestly, it keeps you young!!!
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02.01.13, 03:46 AM
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