MIND THE GAP!
Women, especially single mothers, must rely on caregivers in order to provide for their children. Sure they check references but they mostly go on a "gut feeling" and sense of intuition when deciding who they will trust with their children. That may not be enough. I would imagine a tragedy such as this will increase the number of background checks and a cottage industry will rise up to provide it. I would advise mothers to carefully consider gaps in employment history as much as the actual employment references for they reveal much more in regards to mental illness.
Regarding mothers who do not work? Well, I would imagine the "nanny as status symbol" days are now over. Stay home and spend the time with your children. Your lunch dates, shopping and Yoga classes are not all that important.
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New York City
10.26.12, 01:32 PM
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"Nanny as status symbol"?? You are ridiculous. What, parents should stay with their kids ALL the time? Never get a babysitter?? Give me a break. Do you know ANY parents who NEVER leave their kids with babysitters? (who are probably less vetted than the full time nannies).
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10.26.12, 01:35 PM
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No, but I sure know plenty of women who do not work, who have no real need for a nanny yet feel it necessary to employ one because all of their friends do.
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10.26.12, 01:38 PM
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I don't know anyone who doesn't work yet feels it necessary to employ a nanny "because all of their friends do." I do know SAHM moms who have nannies and use the nanny to help with child care, to take care of one child so the mom can devote some one on one time to the other child (and vice versa), to watch both kids so the mom can cook and clean, etc. This is reality.
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10.26.12, 02:12 PM
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NP: I don't. DD is 3.5 and has been left with a babysitter only about 3 times for no more than 3 hours, unless you count Grandma. But, that's because I have major childcare anxieties based on my own childhood. I don't think this is a good thing. It's my own issue. I definitely don't judge other moms who do. I am trying to get to where they are.
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10.26.12, 02:01 PM
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I am sorry about your childhood experiences, but at least you acknowledge that this is the reason for your anxiety - not just making a sweeping generalization that some people seem to be making about leaving their kids with others. I hope you are able to overcome your anxiety for your sake as well as your DD. GL!
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10.26.12, 02:15 PM
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Are you nuts?
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10.26.12, 01:54 PM
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shut your trap you dumb azz bitter bottom feeder
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10.26.12, 02:26 PM
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