5 year plan help, please! 31 years old, no kids yet. DH is a paramedic (w/o a BS) who is looking to go back to school for an RN (probably 4 yrs of work). I would like to have kids now but could wait 2 years or so. I make a pretty good living. (We rent in Bklyn; have about $150,000 in savings.) Any advice? TIA!
[
Reply | Watch |
Flag
]
Preschool/Kids
11.01.11, 11:50 AM
Flag
»
Have kids when you're ready. Life will adjust.
[
Reply
|
More
]
General Topics
11.01.11, 11:52 AM
Flag
»
39 yo old starting menopause life doesn't always adjust.
[
Reply
|
More
]
General Topics
11.01.11, 11:53 AM
Flag
»
Tell that to younger brother who was a menopause baby. He was born when my mom was 41.
[
Reply
|
More
]
General Topics
11.01.11, 11:58 AM
Flag
»
Most people don't start menopause until late 40's although having a child after 43 is unlikely.
[
Reply
|
More
]
General Topics
11.01.11, 12:02 PM
Flag
»
Oh, she annouced it the day she found out, then she made it a point to keep announcing it everytime she was upset. " I'm going through menopause stop pissing me off!" Then she got pregnant.
[
Reply
|
More
]
General Topics
11.01.11, 12:17 PM
Flag
»
She's 31. this was my advice to a 31yo. It would be different for an older woman.
[
Reply
|
More
]
General Topics
11.01.11, 11:58 AM
Flag
»
I'm assuming your DH is planning on going to school and working at the same time?
[
Reply
|
More
]
General Topics
11.01.11, 11:55 AM
Flag
»
Most likely part time so he can get through school quicker.
[
Reply
|
More
]
General Topics
11.01.11, 12:07 PM
Flag
»
2 years can turn into 5 before you blink. Have them now while you are young and hopefully can, life will work out. Anyway there is never a perfect time to have kids.
[
Reply
|
More
]
General Topics
11.01.11, 11:58 AM
Flag
»
There's never a right time to have a baby - start trying if you want kids. If you make enough to support yourselves, DH can go to school at night and take care of DB during the day - or work and use daycare or a sitter. You have a healthy savings.
[
Reply
|
More
]
General Topics
11.01.11, 11:58 AM
Flag
»
What's stopping you? GO FOR IT.
[
Reply
|
More
]
General Topics
11.01.11, 11:59 AM
Flag
»
Assuming you want to continue working and can afford childcare, I'd definitely go for it.
[
Reply
|
More
]
General Topics
11.01.11, 12:02 PM
Flag
»
I would have the children when I was younger if you can afford them now.
[
Reply
|
More
]
General Topics
11.01.11, 12:04 PM
Flag
»
Start trying now! Esp if you want more than one, this is great timing
[
Reply
|
More
]
General Topics
11.01.11, 12:06 PM
Flag
»
My first was born when DH was in grad school, and let me tell you, it was a struggle. I would come home from working all day to support us, and he would hand off the baby and run to evening class. I'm not suggesting you wait another 4 years, but it's hard to juggle school, work, managing a household, and raising a child, unless you have a lot of help.
[
Reply
|
More
]
General Topics
11.01.11, 12:07 PM
Flag
»
Hmm, this is what I'm afraid of. Both our parents live far away and we can't afford a full-time nanny, just daycare or part-time help.
[
Reply
|
More
]
General Topics
11.01.11, 12:12 PM
Flag
»
Daycare is better than a Nanny..More eyes watching your precious baby. I don't trust Nanny's, I see them doing questionable things all the time.
[
Reply
|
More
]
General Topics
11.01.11, 12:14 PM
Flag
»
Oh lord, get a life!
[
Reply
|
More
]
General Topics
11.01.11, 12:18 PM
Flag
»
I agree with this. My husband was finishing his residency when our baby was born. Although we had a full-time nanny, I still had to handle most of the childcare and other domestic duties on top of my stressful work. We had a little more financial cushion - knew that he had only another year left of his training - so we felt comfortable spending our savings. If you had a baby next year - as your DH begins his schooling, that's a long time to be struggling. Maybe compromise - have the baby at the end of year 2 or 3?
[
Reply
|
More
]
General Topics
11.01.11, 12:15 PM
Flag
»
My dad took evening classes and studied/watched me and brother during the day while mom worked. Then worked nights (ironically on an ambulance.)
[
Reply
|
More
]
General Topics
11.01.11, 12:10 PM
Flag
»
My dad went back to school when we were young too - it was great. He worked nights while in school and was with us after school (I'm the oldest - some were babies).
[
Reply
|
More
]
General Topics
11.01.11, 12:21 PM
Flag
»
Hey! Just wanted to say that I'm a paramedic too, and also working on my science pre-reqs (only for PA not nursing). Tell him to look into Pace, it has a great nursing bridge program. Good for him for having the drive to get off a rig :) Cheers. As far as 5 year plan,
[
Reply
|
More
]
General Topics
11.01.11, 12:29 PM
Flag
»
ugh cut off. Anyway, if you want kids now just go for it. While he's in school might not be the worst time, he'd be around days to help with childcare etc. You guys can make it work.
[
Reply
|
More
]
General Topics
11.01.11, 12:30 PM
Flag
»
He'd love to be a PA but that means like 6 years instead! Good job on getting your PA! He's excited to get off the "bus" too. :)
[
Reply
|
More
]
General Topics
11.01.11, 12:54 PM
Flag
»
Here's your 5-year plan.....Give yourself another 6-months to enjoy the freedom of childlessness, non-pregnancy. Meanwhile, start taking pre-natal vitamins. In about 6 months, start trying to conceive. If you don't already live in a 2 or 3-bedroom, move to one. When your baby is born, start looking for a infant-certified au pair or live-in nanny (I prefer au pairs because they're cheaper and feel more like member of family, but you have to really know how to pick them). Enjoy maternity your leave. Take an extra month or two of leave if you can afford it. Have au-pair/nanny arrive about 3-4 weeks before you return to work. Have your husband start grad school shortly after you return to work. His flexible schedule will allow him to check in on the baby and keep au pair from going over the 45-hour a week rule. And au pair (where you're not paying by hour but total hours/week) will make it so you don't have to rush home from work to relieve nanny and your husband will not be late for or have to rush back from school or studying. My husband was a student when dc#1 was born. It was fine and actually better that we had different schedules.
[
Reply
|
More
]
General Topics
11.01.11, 12:52 PM
Flag
»
Start trying for a baby now! Signed, 30 year old who has been trying to conceive for 6 months...
[
Reply
|
More
]
General Topics
11.01.11, 03:48 PM
Flag