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[-]TTC #2 for 5 months now. DS took 8 months to conceive. No fertility issues - why does it take so much longer for me? Feeling pretty crappy today.
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[-]IVF moms: how many embryos did you transfer? DH and I are seriously considering transferring only 1.
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Actually, I got pregnant the ol' fashion way in a break between IVF 1 (June) and 2. Believe me I didn't want to take a break but the lab was closed for all of August. LOL I was pissed. Our RE told us to try on our own for July and August and when I went to get testing for the next IVF I learned I was pregnant. I actually kept taking pee test and made them give me another blood test because I couldn't believe it.
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RE recommended transferring 3. None were highest rating. Still, I feared triplets, couldn't have dealt with SR. So we did 2. fwiw, as technology improved, and it changes pretty quickly in ART world, top REs have gotten more conservative. There's also increased understanding of risks to twins, that they're much likelier to have delays. So patiets are more open to transferring fewer. Doing a second procedure is $$ but therapy for even mild SNs costs a lot in terms of effort, time,'stre the time we were doing process, I thought we could handle twins. I wasn't hoping for it, but not afraid. Knowing what I know now, I'd transfer 1!
[ Reply | More ]I have not had IVF but we almost had to go that route. We would have transferred 1. We now have 1 DC and again, if we go for a 2nd and need IVF, we will do 1. We didn't want twins and knew we'd want 1 or 2 DCs total and we were willing to pay and go through the process many times to get just 1. If after 3-4 failed IVFs with one, we would have done 2 embryos. With 1 DC, we will only do 1 no matter how many times we might have to do it.
[ Reply | More ]Did 4 cycles: transferred 1 the first time: BFN. 1 the second time: BFN. 5 the 3rd time: BFN. 4 the 4th time (and they were "horrible" embryos): twins (now 5). If you are serious about avoiding twins, then transfer 1 (but be aware, the embryo can still split into identical twins). Really depends on your age, your tolerance for multiples, your doctor's recommendations, and your comfort level. GL!
[ Reply | More ]PS I think you and your DH are very smart for understanding that a twin pregnancy/birth is significantly higher-risk than a singleton. That being said, a twin pregnancy is a world away from a triplet (or more) pregnancy, so I personally think that transferring 2 is still reasonable. The reason I transferred so many on my 3rd and 4th cycles was 1) my age 2) embryo quality was allegedly poor and 3) we were okay with twins (knowing this would be my one and only pregnancy).
[ Reply | More ]OP: thanks all for sharing your thoughts and info. I wish I got more insight from my RE on the matter- seems so odd to be researching such an important matter online when I'm supposedly being treated at one of the best fertility clinics...
[ Reply | More ]NP: They'll tell you at the time of transfer how many they recommend. If at all possible, have your DH there or at least available by phone. DH and I thought the recommendation was going to be 3 and we were going to ask for only 2. Game day comes (DH was only availble by phone) and RE recommends 4 due to my age (39). DH said go for 4. I didn't want it to be my fault it failed, so agreed to 4 good embryos. Spent the next couple of days (foolishly) crying and otherwise freaking out that I was going to have quadruplets. Hah. Ended up miscarrying. IVF#2 (FET) we transferred all 3 we had and again I miscarried. Heading into IVF #4 (Fresh) next week, and I'll be mentally fine with up to 5 getting transferred. Trust your RE if you are at...
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[-]Just got through my second miscarriage in less than at year. Conceived naturally at 38 (actually totally an accident) miscarried at 16 weeks due to complications from a cvs test. Conceived again at 39 this past december after 4 months of trying. Just had d&c at 9 weeks, fetus stopped growing at 7 weeks no heartbeat. I was going to an RE at the time just to get a head start in case we did have ttc issues so we've been tested for all the standard stuff and no real problems, he wanted to do a monitored cycle and i had three follicles on my own no drugs, seemed totally weird to me but he said that was no abnormal, just not really common either. Decided to do a trigger shot and timed intercourse and it worked. So not 100% natural but a little as...
28 replies [ Reply | Watch | Moresorry hit return too soon! Anyway, RE said miscarriage can happen at any age, i'm not at any greater risk for another one however would suggest injectible hormones so we can get pregnant sooner rather than later. He said its not a matter of getting pregnant its a matter of how long it will take and if we'd want a second child it's better to push things along a little quicker. I'm hesitant but scared to death we won't conceive naturally again, has anyone used injectibles at 39 without known fertility issues and had quick success?
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Im seeing Goldschlag at Cornell. I have alot of confidence in him and he's been nothing but upbeat but as an RE is objective is of course to get us pregnant as fast as possible. I do feel like we have a good shot naturally again but if he can speed things up and the cost isn't excessive I'd be thrilled. He hasnt' mentioned clomid, I wouldn't mind giving that a shot first.
[ Reply | More ]You've had m/c, you're not young. Fertility doesn't just fade. It can drop off. You're at a top clinic, listen to the RE. We were aggressive and have dc. I wonder if we could have done it on our own. But id rather be here than be without dc and wondering if being more aggressive would have made a difference. Sorry about losses, gl
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mulitple ectopics. did ivf and it was successful. don't be afraid to try it. more important to get pregnant before 42 if using your own eggs, than how you get pregnant.
[ Reply | More ]Thanks, it is totally the fear of the unknown. I wish I had a crystal ball to see how this was going to play out but for now will take it day by day. Holding out hope we'll be one of those couples that conceives right away after miscarriage.
[ Reply | More ]don't hold out hope too long. better to have younger eggs. also good ivf with an excellent embryologist can help make sure your embryos are viable, so you don't waste time with too many miscarriages. it doesn't matter if you get pregnant with ivf or a surrogate or do cesarian. that's not what makes you a parent. don't get caught up in that childishness.
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i'm so sorry you are going through this.. miscarriages are terrible, i also had two before having my dd. i was also at cornell, they are the best!!! i had a successful ivf and my infertility was definitely unexplained... i say go for it!!! ivf isn't that bad, it's just emotionally stressful. especially given the fact you are 39 i wouldn't continue with the iui's....the good news is your body can get pregnant, so ivf should b your ticket!! good luck:)
[ Reply | More ]I got pregnant twice on my own but it took about 2 yrs each time ( we miscarried in both cases). I wasn't diagnosed with any specific fertility issues but I didn't want to wait another 2 years so we just moved on to ivf. It worked the first time and was fairly easy because I didn't need a ton of shots. Unfortunately we miscarried again, but given that I'm not getting any younger we'll definitely try ivf again so we don't have to wait so long.
[ Reply | More ]Can I ask a question? Did the CVS find no issues with the first pregnancy - you just miscarried as a result of the procedure itself? Sorry, I have no advice to offer but best of luck with things.
[ Reply | More ]There was nothing wrong with the pregnancy, i developed a severe infection shortly after the procedure and miscarried a week later. Once the infection stared there was nothing that could really be done. The baby was perfectly healthy. Devastating and why I am not an advocate of the invasive tests unless your confident you'd terminate a pregnancy based on the results. I will never get over that guilt.
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i'm 41 and also had 2 miscarriages last year and have had no success in the 3 months since my last. just finished taking clomid and will try IUI this month. i got pg right away with my dcs so it's just unexplained infertility. i never thought getting pg again would be so difficult.
[ Reply | More ]I would keep your chin up, I hardly think not getting pregnant after 3 months qualifies you as infertile! It can take alot longer especially after 40 and you did get pregnant twice last year. My RE said 50% of couples will get pregnant within 3 months the rest will take up to a year. I'm 39 and he said that still applied to me as well. Have you discussed injectibles instead of clomid? He told me injectibles are more aggressive but will probably work more quickly.
[ Reply | More ]the two pgs were after 2 years of trying, albeit on and off. trying to keep my chin up but i'm feeling like it will never happen and if it does, i won't stay pg! it's just one failed month after another. We didn't discuss injectibles but think i'll bring it up next month. thanks for the advice!
[ Reply | More ]I just want to say yes, age does work against us in some ways, but I know many personal friends who have gotten pregnant at 40, 41, and most recently 42, (she had been trying for at least 3 years) You can still get pregnant it might just take longer or some assistance. Just as a reminder, yes fertility declines with age but every women is different. You don't wake up a day after your 40th bday with 90% fewer eggs than you did at 39 & 11months. My sister has been ttc since 37 no success after 5 years, my 1st was an accident at 38, #2 was ttc 4 months. Every women is different and we can't be all dumped in one bucket. Focus on the future and you will get there!
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np - dont think this is true. 41 yos may have more difficulty getting pregnant but there isnt a significant increase in miscarriage risk. at least according to my ob. i got pregnant with my first at 42.
[ Reply | More ]uh, unexplained infertility is a dx you get after other diagnosable reasons for infertility are ruled out. my 2 mc's were due to trisomy, which can, and do, happen at any age. of course age is an issue but that has nothing to do with "unexplained infertility." interesting that you are on the TTC board and posting comments while so uninformed about what women TTC are talking about.
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[-]I am in my first IVF cycle and I'm doing PDG and will have to do a frozen embryo transfer / FET. My REs never made the FET schedule clear to me, so I thought could have a transfer on my next cycle (ie one month after retrieval). I just found out that they recommend waiting once cycle, meaning that you do not do the transfer until two months after retrieval. I know it's only one month, but after suffering through 5 m/cs, I am at the end of my rope with waiting. The doctor finally agreed with having me move forward with a transfer on my next cycle because my hormone levels look okay. Has anyone out there done a FET on the cycle following their retrieval and have any experiences or insights to share?
7 replies [ Reply | Watch | MoreI'm sorry, the whole process is so confusing and frustrating, and the meds don't help. The REs suggest you wait two months so that your uterus ph has returned to normal, the Stims can hurt the lining. I would just listen to whatever they recommend. Are you familiar with ivfconnectuions.com? Youll get a lot of info and support there. GL
[ Reply | More ]I've got FET twins, just wishing you good luck this cycle! My FET was done long after my fresh cycle (fresh cycle, also twins, ended in m/c) so I've got no real advice on timing. I say trust your RE, they know what is best.
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[-]Anyone a current or previous patient of Dr Noyes at NYU? She's been totally unresponsive and MIA despite numerous attempts to contact her (and I'm a current patient). Any advice on how to deal with a completely unresponsive doctor while you are undergoing fertility treatments?!
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I had a GREAT experience with her, 15 years ago. So sorry to hear of this. I would call and leave the detailed message as suggested above, but I would not do the 90 minute calling. I would feel as I were harassing the staff, instead I might ask the person on the phone how to get the dr. to call me back. this has worked for me before. GL
[ Reply | More ]I am currently at NYU but with Dr Keefe. I have have a pretty terrible experience with them thus far for a number of reasons, one of which is I have found my doctor (Dr Keefe) to be pretty unresponsive. His assistant never seems to pick up his line, and I have left messages for follow up appointments that have gone completely unanswered (although I do like him once I actually get him on the phone). Now that i am in the middle of an IVF cycle I've become a lot more assertive. If I were you I would continue to call (if as a previous person mentioned it is indeed something that you need doctor advice on and is not something the nurses can answer), and I would also ask Dr Noyes once you do speak with her for her email address and/or cell phone...
[ Reply | More ]I also go to NYU (different doctor) but have had a similar experience. If this is indeed a question that the nurses cant answer, I would continue to call. If there is one thing Ive learned in this process is that it's important to be assertive - and if the receptionist isnt getting the message to her, try others. Once you get through to her, ask for cell phone/email. Mine gave me his and he's been much more responsive to email.
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[-]Exercise during IVF: would you play tennis in between retrieval and transfer?
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[-]Hi - I'd like some advice on whether I should have laparoscopy surgery before proceeding with my first IVF. I do not know if I have endometriosis but : my first 2 days of my period are very heavy and painful, I have severe lower back pain before/during my period followed by a dull pain around my lower abdomen for a week after my period ends, and I have pain shooting down my legs during my period. My RE (Spandorfer at Cornell) thinks I should skip the lap and go directly to the IVF since he says that IVF bypasses endometriosis but has explained much more. He's left it up to me to decide how we should proceed saying that if the first IVF fails, we'd then do a laparoscopy to see what may be going on. I'm inclined to do the lap since I'd rather...
5 replies [ Reply | Watch | MoreI had lap for endo with Spandorfer. I had the lap bc I had SEVERE period cramps (it literally was as bad as labor)... I didn't start TTC until a year after and at that point felt the endo was starting to come back bc the cramps were starting to get worse again....Long story short I was able to get pregnant....However, I have a friend who did multiple IVF's and couldn't get pregnant so then had a lap and found she had stage 4 endo. After her surgery she could pregnant immediately. Have you done IVF before? If you are a good responder I would say go for the IVF and if you don't respond well to the meds then maybe do the Lap just to ensure there aren't any roadblocks....
[ Reply | More ]I did IVF with Spandorfer in 2007 and he strongly recommended laparoscopy before we started down infertility treatments. I did and had stage2-3. I thought it could impact and/or prevent a pregnancy which was why he suggested it but maybe studies suggest otherwise. It wasn't that invasive and I think I started treatments a month later. I'd do it if your gut is telling you too. GL!
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Just got through my second miscarriage in less than at year. Conceived naturally at 38 (actually totally an accident) miscarried at 16 weeks due to complications from a cvs test. Conceived again at 39 this past december after 4 months of trying. Just had d&c at 9 weeks, fetus stopped growing at 7 weeks no heartbeat. I was going to an RE at the time just to get a head start in case we did have ttc issues so we've been tested for all the standard stuff and no real problems, he wanted to do a monitored cycle and i had three follicles on my own no drugs, seemed totally weird to me but he said that was no abnormal, just not really common either. Decided to do a trigger shot and timed intercourse and it worked. So not 100% natural but a little as...
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Just got through my second miscarriage in less than at year. Conceived naturally at 38 (actually totally an accident) miscarried at 16 weeks due to complications from a cvs test. Conceived again at 39 this past december after 4 months of trying. Just had d&c at 9 weeks, fetus stopped growing at 7 weeks no heartbeat. I was going to an RE at the time just to get a head start in case we did have ttc issues so we've been tested for all the standard stuff and no real problems, he wanted to do a monitored cycle and i had three follicles on my own no drugs, seemed totally weird to me but he said that was no abnormal, just not really common either. Decided to do a trigger shot and timed intercourse and it worked. So not 100% natural but a little as...
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[-]Looking for success stories from anyone who has had multiple miscarriages and eventually had a healthy pregnancy. Just had my 3rd yesterday which was extra difficult because we did ivf and had seen a heartbeat the week before. Part of me wants to give up because I'm tired of trying but we really want a baby and I felt like we were so close this time. :(
12 replies [ Reply | Watch | MoreMy beautiful, perfect niec, who was born 6 weeks after my first, was my sister's 6th pregnancy. Her third IVF worked at 36. She was in hell and now is in heaven. We all love our kids, but there is a special bond when you wait so long and endure such heartache. It will work; you will get a baby if you don't give up. <3
[ Reply | More ]HI, I know how heartbreaking a miscariage can be and giving up sometimes feels like the only way to stop the sadness. Ask your doctor if it is possible that you are producing anti-bodies and your body is rejecting the embryo/fetus. That is what happened to me! Once they were able to identify that problem getting pregnant was easy. I had to have an imunosuppressing IV drip the day of insemination and then 4 weeks later and and a final IV (IV drip for 4hrs) at about 10 weeks. Once I reached my 12th week my body accepted the pregnancy. I am so grateful that my doctor was able to find this very elusive problem. I had to have a DNC performed after one my 2nd miscarriage and they were aggressive in testing all the reasons that could have c...
[ Reply | More ]Thanks for the suggestion. I do know I have elevated ANA levels but the doctor doesn't seem too concerned (feeling like I need a second opinion). We are going to try Lovenox next time in case I have a clotting issue. Glad to hear things worked out for you. I hope we're as fortunate!
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Cry, scream, grieve, resent as much as you need to. Then don't give up. If you give up, you will never know the sheer joy of having children. And believe me, you WILL absolutely have children. I had a miscarriage at 20 weeks,then a healthy DD. Then another miscarriage, followed by 3 IUIs and then IVF. Now have a beautiful son. It was a LONG road... but now I look back and can definitively say it was all worth it. It is soo soo so hard though when you are in the middle of it. Just keep your eye on the prize and try and power through it. Find a therapist who specializes in m/c and infertility to help you along the way. Also get all the recurrent loss testing done as previous poster suggested. if you want a baby, you will get a baby. It's that...
[ Reply | More ]One more suggestion - if you find a dr who will do PGD (pre-implantation genetic diagnosis) on the embryos before they are put back in, you might lessen your m/c rate. I did that as well. Out of 7 embryos, 3 were genetically flawed and either never would have implanted or i would have miscarried. It significantly increases your chance of success.
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I had three mcs -- the third just days after I'd seen the heartbeat -- and then a healthy pregnancy. Do you like your RE?
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[-]Can anyone recommend a great RE that takes Blue Cross Blue Shield in-network? TIA.
2 replies [ Reply | Watch | More"Great" may not be accurate but Columbia (CWRC) takes BCBS and I was successful there with my first IVF, though I wasted way too much time (like almost a year) on IUIs. If you go there, it may be worth waiting for an appointment to get one of the more senior doctors as your primary. Stein/Keltz at SLR also take BCBS but I just couldn't deal with their office.
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[-]For all those who have gone through IVF at NYU, what is the process like? Are you required to attend the orientation before starting?
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[-]Has anyone used IVF to conceive and kept it a secret from family and friends?
5 replies [ Reply | Watch | MoreThink tons of people do this. It should be your choice. But like anything else, the more you keep something secret, the more you feel that there's something shameful about it-- and,in this case, there isn't! I have the feeling people who are open about it have an easier time than people who hide the whole story.
[ Reply | More ]ID. There's a difference between privacy and secrecy. We told almost no one that we were doing IVF, a couple family members and close friends. Everyone was kind but, still, I began to regret not having the discipline to keep it to DH and I (he had no interest/need to discuss it with anyone). Think it's best not to get specific about procedures, just say getting tested, using medication. People burden you with all kinds of ignorant and well meaning stories of friends of friends who got pregnant after they stopped trying, took a vacation, etc... (they don't know that some of these folks probably did IVF with donor eggs and just aren't discussing it). Then, one started asking about how many embryos, plans for them, etc... and I didn't know i...
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my mother had me when she was 42 and she was the most wonderful mother. i am now 44 and sad that she is no longer alive. however, i repeat, she was a wonderful mother who made me feel loved every moment and never seemed "old" or "tired." i think that you should go for it; you may be giving a child the same gifts my mother gave to me.
[ Reply | More ]No....it isn't too old. I had my first baby at age 21(will be 18 in a few months). Had several more and my most recent was born the end of 2007(I was 37...almost 38). I am considering having one more myself.....Speaking from the perspective of being a younger mother and an older mother.....Older mothers have more patience and stamina.
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I'm an older mother and I find the younger mothers to be a bunch of nitwits and ninnies. The older mothers are so much more real and less into social games. Oh, I am just so much better a mother those with firmer bosoms! And of course, my kids are all 99x3 and all in tt places and about to appear at Carnegie Hall next week.
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evolutionarily it is OLD to have a baby, and 42 is incomprehensible (evolutionarily). I cannot fathom having a child at 42 and knowing I'll be 60 when I'm driving them to college; that I could easily be 70 or 75 when I have my first grandchild--or, if they waited as long as I had, that I'd likely never see my grandchildren at all.
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No! There is no right or wrong. This decision is up to you. It depends on your health, dreams, marriage and so on. I wished I had had my kids 10 years earlier, but it didn't happen (m/c, tragic live events), now I am 43 and expecting...
[ Reply | More ]Good for you! I pity your children, though. We're going to have an entire generation of kids in their 20s and 30s who, just as they're starting their families and seeing their careers kick into high gear, will be saddled with elderly parents who will likely need caring for, too. Sad.
[ Reply | More ]Why do you have to pity my children? Do you know how long you are going to live? Do you know if you are going to develop cancer in 5 years and your kids are going to have to grow up without you or have to watch your slow decline? Spare me your hypocritical pity! I hope live will be good to you and to me and my kids too.
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I had my first (and only) bio baby at age 40 and adopted first child at age 38. I feel a little bad that I'm not younger but I'm so glad we're a family. I do try to think long term, take good care of myself and try to be very responsible financially. My mom died when I was 9 (she was 35) so, really I just want to live for my kids as long as possible. If I could have done it earlier I would have but I had a lot of obstacles (including not meeting dh until I was 30) so.
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Good god, what a bunch of drama queens. Had my first at 43 -- no medical science of any kind involved. I'm tired, but what the hell, I was tired before. You could die when the kid is 20, but that could happen for numerous reasons even if you had the kid at 25. Why are you asking the dimwits on this board for advice on this?
[ Reply | More ]I have four kids, ages 11, 10, 8 & 7. I'm itching for another. I love my family so much and really want to add to the mix. My four kids would love and learn so much too by having a baby in the family at this point. I'm now 41 (would be 42 when delivering, at least). My husband would have to have a vasectomy reversal.... A lot to think about and all these opinions are really enlightening. If G-d forbid I die when my child is 20, 30 or 40 years old, he/she will have 4 amazing siblings (not to mention a dad who may not kick the bucket til later...)
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I think that if you want it and feel that you have the energy for it, then you do. And you should go for it. My grandmother had her 1st at 31 and her last at 46. All healthy kids. She is 100 years old and still lives independently. That said, she is a special, energetic woman...while I feel exhuasted and I am a third her age!!
[ Reply | More ]actually that is a good point that before the era of birth control some women had babies until their 40s -- my MIL is one of 11 (!!!) and her mom had kids pretty much every two years from her early 20s to early 40s. That said, the older kids were there to look after the younger ones, vs. say, having ONE kid at 43 which is different. Not saying there is a right and wrong age at all, btw
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Had our first one month shy of 40 and the second at 45. Feel very lucky and blessed.
[ Reply | More ]HI I just happend to trip up on this site while googling "how old is too old to have a baby" this site has helped me a bunch. I was a little undecided about having my 7th baby maybe next year. By then I will be 42. My oldest is almost 23 and my youngest is 3. This site has given me great insight to being a mother over 40 again!! I am excited :)
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depends - #1? prob not...#4...possibly! i am thinking about # 4 but next yr at 42 is the absolute last time to consider it
[ Reply | More ]Had 2nd DC at 43 (almost 44), no fertility treatments. While I would have preferred to have my kids in my 30s, it didn't happen. The upside is that having young kids keeps me much younger in 'outlook' than my friends my age with teenagers who basically act like they ought to be on a bench in Sarasota winding down.
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I am 56 years old and have an 11 year old son...he's the best. I run the NYC Marathon every year, get up early everyday. I am self-employed in a creative industry and never even entertain the the thought of retiring there is so much I still need and want to do. My kid has a stable, relaxed capable mother. Some people are just old in their minds and souls. I'm not. I am also in alot better shape than mothers much younger. My kid is lucky....I bring a lot more to the party than a 20 something mom but the point is we all make our own choices about living our lives and what we want. If you think you are too old then you are. If I was too old I would not have gotten pregnant. I got pregnant the old fashioned way. PS - DC is in a Gift...
[ Reply | More ]Thank you! Love your reply! I'm 43 and pregnant with my second child. Had my first at 40. Even if my daughter has two wonderful half brother and half sister, I always dreamt to have a big family and want her to grow and live everyday with a sibling. Most of my friends think that 38 is too old to have a child (they don't even know I am pregnant yet), but you are right, if you are old in your mind, your soul and heart, then you are an old person. I know people in their 20's that are like that. I, on the other hand, feel like a person who will never get old. I am so young in spirit. My only guilt is to have children live in this crazy, evil World. A lot has changed since I was a kid..... We are in God's hands...
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will let you know. turning 42 soon and will deliver 3rd nearly 2 months later!! definitely harder than the first 2 but that is also because i have little ones running around. do know several women who did it for the first time at this age and are thoroughly happy with the choice!
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The one with the compromised immune system and shortened life expectancy because it was produced from an old egg (and likely even older sperm)?
[ Reply | More ]Sorry, but you don't know what you are talking about. Most women had kids in their 40s in the past with older dhs. Also, the shortened life expectancy is a theory. Not fact. Most likely tied to DHs older sperm than anything. I had my dc at 40 and she is way more healthy than her cohort.
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hello no idont think so at all.....both of my grandmas had babies in their 40s ....i had #1 at 38 #2at 39 and now we are trying for #3 and im 41 if i were to get pregnant right now i would be 42 at birth....dont listen to some of these closed minded people ...if the dont want a babhy at 40 then they shouldnt ...but we do so we are...GOOD LUCK TO YOU AND YOUR FAMILY
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yeah if you are a wreck of a sick lady..always "on the diet". smoking, drinking, family history of illnesses, leading a crappy life style when you know your body will not produce a healthy child....IF however, you are normal healthy woman you can keep having kids till your menapause hits
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[-]we have $100 for food for this entire month. just made a big batch of veggie chili. wwyd?
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yikes. hmm. lots of soups. split pea w/ ham. shop at farmer's markets instead of the store. lots of pasta and canned tomato sauce, add some veggies and ground meat to make it nutritious. that sucks.
[ Reply | More ]How many people is that for? Lots of rice and frozen vegetables. Apply for food stamps and check into food pantry donations...
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Tuna, mac & cheese, shepherd's pie but vegetarian style. Not because I'm a vegetarian but because it's cheaper. Tomato pie. A box of biscuit is a money-saver. Meatloaf can last for two days if you're willing to use a bit more filler (breadcrumbs, oatmeal, mushrooms, ground up lentils) with a bit of beef.
[ Reply | More ]np: I love tuna noodle casserole. Cheap and easy. Egg noodles should be $2 or less, cream of mushroom soup $1.50, dash of milk (i often forget to add it), can of tuna fish $1, +celery, +onion, and a bunch of seasonings to make it spicy and delicious. I top with potato chips, but you don't have to!
[ Reply | More ]I love every hamburger and tuna helper. You guys should indulge your inner child this month
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You may qualify for temporary assistance at your local food bank. Don't be embarrassed to check it out. Go to the supermarket and shop loss leaders. Is there a bakery outlet near you? Google the Tightwad Gazette.
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place run by bakery manufacturers - e.g. Entemanns - they put bread products that will soon expire and excess inventory at big markdowns - loaf of bread might be 1/3 the normal price - cakes and such usualy 50%. Chips and other things that last a long time - usually very little savings if any.
[ Reply | More ]I'll have to check. I think there was one by where I grew up. Thanks. Although, at this time, discounted comfort food is something that should be far far away from me!!
[ Reply | More ]true - i go in there for the bread - they carry 4 or 5 bread brands under the Entemanns umbrella - Arnolds for example; I get 9 loaves of whole wheat sandwhich bread for 9 bucks (in the stores they are 2.89 - 3.49 depending n thebrand) It is also very easy to walk out with dozens of choclate donuts - don't do that. :)
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Chicken Theighs, rice, beans, bag of potatoes, frozen veggies, milk. Go to a food pantry and they will probably give you lots of pasta. You could feed a family of 5 on this for a month. Bring a shopping cart to the food pantry.
[ Reply | More ]I can't rationalize going to a food pantry when my circumstance is due (at least partly) to bad budgeting, living in denial and continuing a former lifestyle we cant currently afford.
[ Reply | More ]yea, just tone it down the next couple of weeks and also put a good budget into place so you are not faced with this again
[ Reply | More ]Go to the 99 cents store and get canned veggies...corn, peas and beans. The bigger the store the better the food selection. Where are you? Also, go to grocery store and only buy what is on sale from here on end. Roasted vegetables and potatoes are your friends now, as are soups that are easy to make and nutritious and yummy this time of year, such as pea and lentil. Might also go to Western Beef.
[ Reply | More ]Np: just go to the food pantry if you need to. You see your role in getting to this point, and are making changes. Making it tougher on yourself than it already is, or needs to be, just isn't efficient or productive. You have to stay focused on getting/keeping work, and you'll be spending more work time planning, cooking, bargain shopping, cleaning, etc.... It's great to plan to eat beans and rice for two weeks. But life happens. Some stuff you can eat from the pantry will give you cushion. If there's some kind of situation--stuck at work or something happens & you have an unexpected expense, budget gets blown. Yes, people skip meals. But it's foolish to do that if you can access a pantry. You'll pay it back when youre on your feet again....
[ Reply | More ]NNP: It is not difficult at all to feed 2 people for 2 weeks on $100. Leave the pantry for families w/ children who need the food.
[ Reply | More ]If she needs or will need food, she should go. That she admits to living beyond her means, and feels bad about taking food, is irrelevant. The shaming is not helpful.
[ Reply | More ]I wasn't shaming - if she gets to a point where she's out of money and needs to go, she should certainly go. But $100 for 2-weeks or even 4, can easily feed 2 people. I wouldn't hit the pantry until everything else was exhausted - but I'd have no shame going to feed my kids. We work at a large pantry 2x a week. I can skip a few meals - I would never take food that a child might need.
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Do you have a crock pot? We get lots of leftovers from those recipes. Try things like crock pot lasagna, ham and potatoes, roast beef and vegetables, soups/chilis. Also, casseroles: enchilada, tuna, etc.
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op: I'd love any ieas for food that is easy to make in a batch and keeps for a few days. Cheap Sunday cooking recipes (even though it's Monday- Thank you, MLK) im making quiche now with a pie crust I forgot I had. Quiche is great cause you can throw ANYTHING in there and it tastes good.
[ Reply | More ]Batch of black beans (in the bag) and you can have it for a variety of days - any soup will freeze. Keep veggie peelings and skin/bones of chicken and make broth. Big thing of rice, oatmeal and grits will be a base. Buy veggies day of from fruit vendors and that will stretch your dollar a lot. Meat should be a garnish (think slice of bacon to give flavor in a root veggir stew)
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If in NYC, the hunger hotline is now on 311 if you want to find the nearest food pantry.
[ Reply | More ]NP and don't be too proud to do it. I had to do it once or twice some time ago and they got me through some really, really tough times. Now I'm in a much better place and am thankful everyday for the help I got or I wouldn't be here.
[ Reply | More ]op: I am so glad to hear your story. I'm a social worker and have been a bit burned out with the air of entitlement SOME recipients of food stamps, medicaid, etc have. I'm still a strong democrat, but it's nice to hear of services being used as temporary lifts, not lifestyles. Mostly, I'm glad you got the help you needed, and I hope 2012 brings you even better things. :)
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what's in your pantry/freezer? Do you have dried beans and lentils and spice? I made white bean soup that lasted for days with just beans, water, onion, and bay leaf (i used a ham hock, but you don't eat meat so you won't miss it). Spiced lentils over rice is soooo yum. Love egg salad sandwiches, sardine sandwiches, and pesto pasta with whatever I find in my cupboards and fridge (olives, sun dried tomatoes, broccoli). You will be fine. You can totally do this if you get creative with what you already have.
[ Reply | More ]Sorry, that really sucks. I would do canned tomato soup and grilled cheese sandwiches, obviously watch out for sales and coupons, do lots of rice and noodle-based dishes. They're filling and cheap. Agree with the breakfast approach- eggs, pancakes. Do baked potatoes as lunch or dinner with some frozen veggies and cheese sauce. If you have staples (flour, sugar) on hand you can bake cakes for a treat for not much $.
[ Reply | More ]chili was a great idea, entemanns has bakeryoutlets where you can whole wheat bread $1 a loaf - not sure if you have one near you - we have one in Brooklyn (buy a bunch and freeze them). Bag of potatoes is pretty cheap - cut a whole in the top and bake them with butter and a little cheese. Buy a bag of flour and make your bread, make your own pizza, stick to the absolute staples in the market and you should be fine.
[ Reply | More ]You know what OP, here is apositive, I've been living like this for several months now; no junk food only essentials - everyone tells me my husband and I look great, actually we lost weight and do feel great - the truth is I'm afraid to go to a superbowl party because my husband might grab the big bowl of chips with dip and just hug it.
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sure they do and cell phones, they are one of the last things to go - well actually I am using my neighbors WIFI (with permission) right now. Cell phone is a must - once you lose the ability for people to contact you - you have really lost hope of getting out of the mess.
[ Reply | More ]Yes they do. My post-grad school poverty period included a MacBook. Living with three other girls in Brooklyn, working at a high-end clothing store. Eating canned soup (progresso, cheapest for the size) or bagels, often skipping meals or rent wouldn't be paid.
[ Reply | More ]This is my point- if you had a Mac book and had gone to grad school, you were nowhere near close to actual poverty. It's all relative. People without resources generally can't make it to gad school, much less college.
[ Reply | More ]I am not disagreeing with you - poor people don't even have a fridge let alone worry about what is in it, but you can also have every advantage and still find yourself in long term unemployment/underemployment and have to budget your food - that is what I got out of this post - OP does not want food stamps s/he just wants some ideas how to stretch $100 for food for 2 weeks for 2 people which is entirely doable, not fun but doable.
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Eat like poor people or the rest of the world does: beans or non animal sources for protein(such as tofu) coupled with a whole grain for carbs(such as brown rice) makes a complete protein of more value than steak nutritionally. Add in some veggies(canned or frozen are cheap). So your grocery list is: black beans or other type of beans, oil(you need oil), brown rice, canned or frozen veggies, cheese(dairy and to round out the meal), whole wheat tortillas(you can get a huge stack from costco and many bodegas), and milk.
[ Reply | More ]mac n' cheese with velveeta and a small amount of nice sharp cheese with frozen broccoli and cut up ham (if you like); lasagna with frozen spinach, ricotta, and a little ground beef or pork (can freeze this); lentil and vegetable soup with a chicken or beef stock; rice and beans with all grilled chicken.
[ Reply | More ]Go to a bulk food store and buy brown rice, lentils and dried beans (black beans, pinto or great Northern beans). From a discount grocery store, buy eggs, milk, peanut butter, oatmeal and bread. Add onions, garlic, chicken/veggie stock cubes, pasta, bulk carrots, tortillas, cheese and bananas if you can. You will need protein density to keep you feeling full, so evaluate food by how many grams of protein you can get. Alternate peanut butter sandwiches, fried egg sandwiches or oatmeal for breakfast. If you have spices/herbs, you can make a great white bean rosemary soup, black bean cumin soup, mashed pinto beans for tortillas, lentil soup, dahl and rice. You could also make bean and cheese burritos, egg salad sandwiches and boiled eggs with ...
[ Reply | More ]Cheesh, I think we are going to be able to fuel a spaceship by the end of this with our gas from all these beans!! haha. Thanks everyone, I'm going to use your recommendations. Soups and veggies- It will be good for me to get used to eating food that is more plain anyway- and to stop the take out train from coming to our house so often.
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I've been spending over $250 a month on groceries just for myself plus extra on Dunkin Donuts & takeout. I think I should try only spending $100 for a month too.... I don't know if I can do it... Problem will be that I don't cook so I don't have any staples at home (oil, ketchup, spices, who knows what else...)
[ Reply | More ]There are a lot of good and free online resources. Here's one from All You. AY is a publication put out by Time Inc. for Walmart. But there are many other budget planning resources you can look at for ideas. This is the link for the AY source: http://www.allyou.com/food/budget-meal-planning-00411000067202/
[ Reply | More ]OP- not to make light of your problem, but wanted to say thanks for this post, it was really inspiring to me for ideas of how to stick to a strict budget while putting food on the table. finances are tight for us as well. I'd say my top tips are farmers market- can do about 2 weeks of fresh veggies there for $30- don't go to the organic stand, go to the mexican guys- get cabbages, carrots, things that last a while in the fridge. Also, buy a 20lb bag of rice and a bunch of dehydrated beans.
[ Reply | More ]ps- if you cut up your carrots (don't get the "baby" ones, get whole carrots) and celery and put them in water and then in the fridge in the water, they will last 2 weeks if you change out the water for fresh water after week #2. also, hard boil a bunch of eggs = complete protein snack that's cheap!
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[-]Just found that i am pregnant!!! Cannot believe it--we had been TTC for almost three years and had been thinking about IVF for almost one year, but did not have the courage to do it yet. Was about to do it this March (already took the class, did all necessary tests etc). And now I am pregnant! So happy about it! One question though: we do have to travel to Asia in Feb which is my third month (was planning to do IVF after this trip). It would be extremely hard to cancel this trip. So wonder if anyone had done something similar before? I just made a doc appt for early Feb.
7 replies [ Reply | Watch | MoreWent to Japan at 10 weeks pg. Walked all over the place. Ate sushi. Ask your dr. but if all looks good you should be fine.
[ Reply | More ]you CAN'T eat sushi when your pregnant...well I guess you can if you are an idiot. Speak to you Doctor poster and don't get your info here. You will likely be told to wear support hose on the plane both ways. You are at a higher risk for a blood clot while being pregnant. With taking almost three years to get pregnant I would seriously consider if this trip was worth it.
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[-]Hi, I'm considering switching doctors from Spandorfer to Pak Chung, and would like advice or comparison between the two. I'm 39 with good egg and hormone numbers, but our first and only medicated IUI failed. I've been seeing Spandorfer for almost a year and while he's sweet and gentle he doesn't really offer up much info and I find myself doing all research and asking him questions. At 39, I feel like I'm nd pushing for more of an aggressive treatment. He initially suggested Clomid and I pushed for the medicated IUI. And now I'm about to push for IVF. But before I do, does anyone recommend Pak Chung over Spandorfer? Also, I'm considering having a laparoscopy since he didn't do that. Any advice would be greatly appreciated.
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I don't know anything about Pak Chung but I would get someone who will be as aggressive as you are willing to be. This isn't something to fool around with. I think many doctors are fairly aggressive. And I wouldn't have waited a year to change so I think you have been overly fair with your current doctor (not that that matters because the goal is the baby ultimately, not being fair to your current doctor). Just friendly advice.
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I've had Spandorfer, loved him and trusted him. Got pregnant after 3rd IUI with shots. I was almost 40 at that time. Ive had an impression he is quite aggressive - I've seen him first time in January, got positive test in May. Did you tell him you want more aggressive approach? Don't know anything about Pak Chung.
[ Reply | More ]Funny. I am also thinking about switching from Dr. Spandorfer to Dr. Pak Chung (among others. I agree, Dr. Spandorfer is sweet but I am looking for a competent fertility specialist not a sweet one. It may be a little uncomfortable swiching from one fertility specialist to another within the same practice so I may try another medical facility instead. Before I take the final step, I too would appreciate some feedback. Thanks.
[ Reply | More ]I first saw Spandorfer last jan after trying for almost two years and three failed IUI. I have to say I am not too happy with him--he is nice but he does not provide much information. Our first appt was rushed and he just directly recommended IVF without explaining carefully what this means, what are things to consider, as if I knew everything about IVF.
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