[-]FYI: All of this tier nonsense you discuss here only gets handed down to your DCs. By the time we were 10 we knew the rankings of each school and which was considered filled with brainiancs and which were filled with just rich kids with the means not to be dumped in public. If you think that will not hurt or in some alter your DCs perception of themselves you are wrong. The cycle and the tiers have existed forever how about you start to break the cycle by growing up?
2 replies [ Reply | Watch | Options ]I so, so agree. Besides, it is all BS. The best school is the best school for your particular child. People are kidding themselves. It is such a shame that parents in NYC can't get a grip on their social/status anxiety. I actually know parents who make snide comments about the schools their so-called friends kids are applying to. How f--ked up is that?
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[-]A modest proposal: Since the MS44 building seems to have a bit of room, Anderson should take non-"gifted" students in one or two additional classrooms on a lottery basis or as 87 overflow. It would become a school with a heralded gifted program, but not an exclusively "gifted" school. That would relieve some of D3 overcrowding, but still allow the programs geared to its students to continue, while also creating opportunities for other students in the region. Doesn't it make sense to use the space for D3 kids? What harm could there be to the school or to present students to have a few classes each grade that are not in the gifted program? (signed, an unaffected parent with child in another school - not 87 or Anderson)
9 replies [ Reply | Watch | Options ]Why would you want tiers in a school which currently doesn't have any? Does that even make sense?
[ Reply | Options ]Not a public mom I think the whole premise of the g&t is for the parents to feel their dcs are special or smarter and to gear their entire learning experience to that premise. To put them in normal classes or put normal kids in their classes would create a lot of hullaballoo from those competitive parents.
[ Reply | Options ]Do you think the same way about parents who have their children in private schools, esp the ones in "TT" schools?
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[-]H1N1 weekend clinic report: I went to the Queens clinic, which I realize won't be an option for many on this board, but I wanted to say that the whole process was super smooth/fast. I think it was less than 45 minutes from start to finish, and my the time I left the line was very short. I think a lot of people got there early to get it over with at the start of their day.
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[-]I would love some input from btdt moms to ds. Lately my 4 yr old Ds has been very unkind ot his best friend. Whenever they play eh is bossy and says mean things, to the point where I need to end the playdate. I talk to DS about his behavior and he just shuts down. He only acts this way with this one friend. I don't want to be too intrusive a mother (a problem for me) but I want my child to be kind to his friend. Advice?
5 replies [ Reply | Watch | Options ]my dd had a friend in prek like that, only she was the one who was the recipient of the bossy/mean child. i told her when she would complain about it, that friends dont treat you that way and that she should play with someone else because the kid was not acting like a friend. not sure if it worked to stop the other kids behavior, but it did empower my child. you could say something along the same lines to your kid and remind him that you should treat people how you wish to be treated.
[ Reply | Options ]I think you should keep working with your child, and even perhaps punish your child by withholding playdates for a week, or something like that. My ds was on the receiving end of that behavior. His best friend ended up befriending the "class bully" who was really FAR too socially sophisticated to be in the grade in which he was placed. Through first and second grade my kid was treated badly by this boy he had thought of as "best friend" in pre-k and k. The situation ended badly for the class bully as well as for the boy who was mean to my child. Class bully was counseled out (private), and other child lost his friends (including my ds). I don't know why the parents did not intervene more. We teach the kids reading and math, but somehow expe...
[ Reply | Options ]I know a LOT of 4 yo boys who have gone through this, my own son, included. They do grow out of it, and, in some part, I believe it's because other kids stop putting up with it and start ignoring them. It doesn't mean you shouldn't try to curb it on your own though. I would definitely tell the best friend's mom though before she discovers it on her own and gets pissed- just let he know you're working on it. I told the friend's mom that if he acts this way at their house to please shut it down.
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Dear DH: The reason I am always so frustrated & angry with you is because it's like you're another child for me to take care of. I know that's hard to believe, but it's true. I understand that our 2yo wanted those scissors & you were awfully busy reading the paper, but did it not occur to you that perhaps that was a bad idea? I also understand that you work very hard all day -- I can really commiserate because I also have a job outside the home -- but do you not think getting the kids in bed takes priority over your iPhone? I can see how you thought the housework gets done all by itself because it's always so nice & neat around here, but honestly, the cleaning fairy doesn't really exist. These are hard truths to face, but I think you'r...
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[-]What's fun for us to do in NYC with 5 y/o that's not expensive? (Besides going to a playground). has anyone see that new kids movie j51?
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[-]Any tt alums sending their kids to Manhattan public schools? Please tell me your impressions of how their education compares to yours so far.
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We lived in CT for three years and sent public. Both of us are tt alums. We toured privates out there but they seemed like a waste, moved back to new york two years ago in part because of education. No one wants to believe this but the difference in education is huge.
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i think people believe that but many of us are just not sure how much it matters to any particular kid and how they will gorw and develop into happy and productive people
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never said "detriment" - point is that taking a kid our of a bad environment and exposing them to a fab education can have a profound and life changing effect - OTOH if the kid is from an upper middle class educated home where they read and go to museums and work hard then the "better" education will be less impactful - but of course not detrimental!
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I disagree entirely, my husband and I walk around the museums in new york city but we don't really know much about what we are looking at so the experience or enrichment is pretty much lost on us. Our children however who are receiving a fabulous education know so much about what we see they can explain eras and make references to the development of artistic styles etc. that we find fascinating. They, because of their education, are getting far more out of life in general than we are.
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Depends on what you scrifce for the better education, right? What is the opportunity cost?
[ Reply | Options ]IMO the cost of a lifetime of understanding on a level even I don't grasp at 45 is much more important than anything else material. All of this talk about 'we enrich our children in other ways we go to France'. That is nice, but do your children have any real understanding of why europe may be important, why what they are looking at or the building they are standing in is significant? Its like taking someone who has never cracked open a science book into a NASA museum. Ok, so you went, but what did you get out of it? Chances are very little.
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Just don't believe that going to a Manhattan private school is the only way to gain this knowledge
[ Reply | Options ]You know, Dh and I are both very intelligent he went to Ivy (I did not though) and we did well at college and we have good jobs but we just don't have the same foundation an excellent education before 18 provided. To the women below discussing tours, a walk around for a few hours lead by a scholar is not in any way a comparison to years of study in a single area, something that the schools our children are in provide. I understand that people all want to do what is best for the dcs and for a lot of people the best has to be public and of course you supplement where you can, but that does not remove facts about different levels of education from the equation.
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And if it isn't then there is no point to the discussion. I am not advocating all expensive private schools as superior and I am not advocating that people struggle in other areas to provide it. I am offering an opinion to people who do find education important, but if you don't you should spend on whatever you do feel is important.
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Some of us prefer to use experiences to educate our families. Many museums provide tours, as do cities. The resources are out there . Il's scrimped to send Dh to a private school. He would never do it. He saw the family time/vacations sports classes etc his cousins had and would have preferred that.
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I live in CT now, and when I miss living in NYC, I read the NY SCHOOLS board and feel very thankful. I feel that there is a time and place for everything, and I appreciate taking my kids out of the school pressure-cooker and letting them enjoy their childhood. Education is important to us, but it's definitely not worth the high-stress childhood that goes along with private education in NYC.
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[-]Instead of having holiday pics taken before the holidays, anyone have holiday photos taken DURING the holidays when all family/friends are in one place? Was thinking this might make a nice gift for grandparents.
1 reply [ Reply | Watch | Options ]Sounds nice but depends on how many little kids there are. Trying to take a group picture with lots of toddlers is not easy b/c it is very hard to get them to look at the camera and sit still. If it is all older kids then it should be fine. However, most places charge a sitting fee per person so make sure to take that into account when you total the cost.
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[-]Ideas; Advice. My 5 year old brother (yeah, I'm 27 years old, big gap, etc..) was recommended for a vanguard program going into 1st grade. He is taking the Stanford test in January...what score should I/we be expecting? I WILL be raising this kid in 15 years, so I want to knowwhat I'm in for. TIA!
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[-]I'm going Speyer. Done. I don't care what you guys say. It is the best for our family. AND I don't have to keep up with the Jones's.
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[-]Any women on here who actually LIKE The Big Lebowski? I'm not aware of a single woman who likes it, or a single man who has said he doesn't like it.
27 replies [ Reply | Watch | Options ]op: me neither. dh is watching it now... it's just as bad as I'd remembered! but he's enjoying it (and he generally has good taste in movies). i don't get it...
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Hate it. Don't even get me started on The Hudsucker Proxy (or No Country) If dh puts that movie on one more time . . . I do grudgingly admit to liking O Brother, Where Art Thou?
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Love TBL -- I think Caddy Shack is the one that only men like - and EVERY man in North America has seen it and can quote from it, including my friend Ramesh who grew up in Mumbai.
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[-]18 month old DC slipped out of his second plaster splint in two days -- supposed to be protecting his fractured left foot -- xrays negative. Now he can weightbear with little pain. ER says to come back. The foot seems much better. Anyone with experience with a "fractured" toddler foot? TIA!
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[-]what should i pay our nanny to stay overnight when my husband and I are away? and what about to stay over and work for a weekend while we're away? we have two children (currently six months and almost three years).
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[-]I did the post asking what you are most proud of, thinking of a big accomplishment that you worked hard to achieve. Now the opposite question: what single thing did you do as an adult/parent that you most regret or are most ashamed of? Some one thing you could go back and get a "redo" on if it were possible?
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Said really hurtful things to my dh early on in our marriage that still affect us today. I wish I would have kept my mouth shut about past relationships. I think he still resents things I've said.
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i'm not a parent, but the two bad things i did were ruin my gpa by working too much. i didn't save any money like i should have, and it was not worth the drop in GPA. with my 2.7, I am having a really hard time applying to any grad school, even conditionally. I have a 1400 GRE score but everyone looks at my GPA. I'm unemployed, and I can't even get a job as a grocery store bagger...sometimes I wish I chose a more 'vocational' field. I don't really care about being 'well rounded' when I don't have money to pursue any interests at all
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