11.20.09, 01:35 PM 52 replies
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I am going to get flamed but here we go, schools process is stressful for everyone no matter your position. Dh and I legacy at two TTs and everyone is snippy, sour and waiting for us to fail which is more than possible. Sucks.

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11.20.09, 01:35 PM Flag ]
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  • I am going to get flamed but here we go, schools process is stressful for everyone no matter your position. Dh and I legacy at two TTs and everyone is snippy, sour and waiting for us to fail which is more than possible. Sucks.

    52 replies [ Reply | Watch | More
    11.20.09, 01:35 PM Flag ]
    • It brings out the worst in people ... some people

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      11.20.09, 01:38 PM Flag
    • Which just goes to show that it does matter whether you went to a TT school...maybe you are more sensitive to it because you've bought into the hype?

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      11.20.09, 01:53 PM Flag
      • Exactly what I mean, that comment says it all. Always a backhanded comment from someone. People who did not go to TT buy into it, my comment is not that we will die if DC does not get in, it is the way people are practically cheering for it to happen.

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        11.20.09, 01:58 PM Flag
        • This is a total "stroke me" complaint...just like when an obviously pretty girl complains about people telling her she's pretty or treating her like an object. You are just looking for validation when you whine like this. Have some dignity. If you need a compliment, just ask for one--don't try to get it out of people by "complaining" about your privileged life. Pathetic in a big way.

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          11.20.09, 03:31 PM Flag
          • Complaining that you are pretty and people treating to "too well" is a lot different than saying it hurts when your child

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            11.21.09, 06:21 AM Flag
          • No its not a stroke me comment. Saying people treating you well because you are pretty is different than saying people are unnecessarily mean toward you and your child daily because they are hoping you don't get something they want. It is very different. You know that but it sounds like you too are just bitter and jealous

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            11.21.09, 08:26 AM Flag
      • NP -- uh, NO. Maybe you need to criticize because you are jealous? My family has a connection at a school and we are stressed too, OP you have my sympathy. Having a connection is like being the chess wiz, everyone EXPECTS you to win, and in some ways the stress is higher.

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        11.20.09, 02:00 PM Flag
        • Thank you, we don't feel like dc is smarter than any other it has to do with us it is like the parents are hoping that we don't get in. And, let me remind everyone, if we do get in it will only ever be because we are 'connected' and dc is a dolt.

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          11.20.09, 02:04 PM Flag
          • of course parents are hoping you won't get in. there are a limited number of spots and if you don't get in their dc has a better chance.

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            11.20.09, 02:11 PM Flag
            • Right, that is the only reason. Care to address my 2nd point?

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              11.20.09, 02:12 PM Flag
              • Is your other point that you are connected? Obviously that helps. Schools even say so. That doesn't imply that your dc is a dolt but it does mean they have an advantage so if there are two equal dcs, yours and an unconnected, yours would more likely get in. Of course the unconnected parents resent that.

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                11.20.09, 04:49 PM Flag
                • Nope, you are wrong.

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                  11.21.09, 07:23 AM Flag
                  • Are you claiming connected students and legacies are NOT more likely to get into the school than the unconnected?

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                    11.21.09, 08:37 AM Flag
                    • Yes, a low scoring legacy is not going to get a spot over a unconnected and even - gasp - a high scoring leg won't get a spot instead of equally qualified unconnected. what every school wants for that year changes every year.

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                      11.21.09, 02:45 PM Flag
        • We went through this last year, luckily we got in- but you never know

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          11.21.09, 08:44 AM Flag
    • Dh and I were in the same boat. Now one dc is at tt and one isn't.

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      11.20.09, 01:56 PM Flag
      • Our dcs too. Sucks. Same scores, 2nd round hunter etc etc, the tt said they just had no room for all the siblings. Feel completely dissed by community.

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        11.20.09, 02:01 PM Flag
        • Funny, my two dcs both had the same erb score and early summer birthdays. One in to tt and one not.

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          11.20.09, 02:03 PM Flag
          • How does the one who is not perceive what happens? I get questions all the time from the younger one. They grew up in big brothers school, do not really understand why they are not there.

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            11.20.09, 02:10 PM Flag
            • I have a ds in a tt ss school and dd in a coed school...

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              11.20.09, 02:27 PM Flag
              • Well that is easier to explain then :)

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                11.20.09, 02:33 PM Flag
            • does a 5yo really understand though that Collegiate is TT and Buckley isn't or that Trinity is TT and CGPS isn't?

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              11.20.09, 05:01 PM Flag
              • No, I don't think so. They just want to be at same school as big brother, where they thought they would be.

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                11.20.09, 05:52 PM Flag
              • eventually they do yes

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                11.21.09, 08:27 AM Flag
                • np: I know several middle school Buckley boys (a good friend's ds is there) and they have no inferiority complex what so ever. If anything I'd say the opposite. Though they are still quite nice and polite (and this is 7th grade not 5 yos).

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                  11.21.09, 08:41 AM Flag
    • Who is "everyone" that is waiting for you to fail?

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      11.20.09, 01:58 PM Flag
      • like the person above with the "more sensitive" comment!

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        11.20.09, 02:00 PM Flag
        • OP here thank you, like that woman. Obviously I don't think "everyone" cares it is used as a figure of speech, as you very well know.

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          11.20.09, 02:02 PM Flag
        • that person is a stranger to you and wouldn't have said anything if you hadn't posted this. unless you tell people you are legacies they don't know. so it seems you could have avoided everyone knowing by not talking about the process so much.

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          11.20.09, 02:03 PM Flag
          • But isn't it perfectly normal to have talked with your peers about where you grew up and where you went to school? I don't think OP was bragging.

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            11.20.09, 02:04 PM Flag
            • Maybe its just obvious that I went to public grade schools. How do you know people are waiting for you to fail?

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              11.20.09, 02:08 PM Flag
              • Again, above poster is not OP, I am. This is ridiculous obviously you have never lived in new york city.

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                11.20.09, 02:09 PM Flag
                • I do live in NYC. I just don't get that worked up about what others think about me and if they want me to fail. There's nothing to be gained from worrying about it.

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                  11.20.09, 02:15 PM Flag
          • "don't ask, don't tell" -- yeah, right! Why can't OP feel the stress and share with people? or perhaps we should get rid of UB altogether? Why does anyone post on here? I still read sour grapes in your comment!

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            11.20.09, 02:05 PM Flag
            • So do I

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              11.20.09, 02:06 PM Flag
              • I'm not applying this year so there's no sour grapes. If the people waiting for her to fail are all on UB then yes, she should get off so she doesn't know they are waiting for her to fail.

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                11.20.09, 02:10 PM Flag
                • No the people who want her to fail are IRL her preschool, friends etc.

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                  11.20.09, 02:11 PM Flag
          • 1. I am not first poster 2. Right, like your preschool isn't small enough for everyone to already know where you grew up and went to school in an environment like this!

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            11.20.09, 02:05 PM Flag
            • np: seriously? pretty sure that none of the parents at my son's preschool could tell you where i went to high school. it has never come up. a few of the ones i am closer to could probably tell you where i went to college, because it figures into my life more (met dh there).

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              11.20.09, 02:14 PM Flag
              • Most people I've met since dcs were in school who know that I grew up in NY ask me where I went to school here.

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                11.20.09, 02:26 PM Flag
                • i guess many of the people we know are not native NYers (in our neighborhood, many people moved here as adults for work).

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                  11.20.09, 02:28 PM Flag
                  • I think that may be part of it.

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                    11.20.09, 02:30 PM Flag
    • Should have gone public then

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      11.20.09, 02:13 PM Flag
      • Riiight, except she went to private so she knows better than to do that to her dcs

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        11.20.09, 02:37 PM Flag
        • this response doesn't make sense. if OP went private she has no first hand knowledge of publics so she doesn't know better than to do that. your reply would only make sense if OP had a bad experience and was chosing differently for her dc

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          11.21.09, 08:40 AM Flag
    • The process was completely unstressful for us last year. We're in a zone where we could live with the public school, DC got into half the schools we applied to, and a good G&T. There wasn't a stressful point during the whole thing.

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      11.20.09, 04:38 PM Flag
      • NP: care to share that valium?

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        11.20.09, 05:50 PM Flag
    • snippy and sour is probably true,as it is behavior you can see. waiting for you to fail? you have no idea what's in the heads of other people. i would assume your child will get in

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      11.21.09, 07:30 AM Flag
      • i'm not saying you should assume that, just that as part of "everyone" i would, not knowing child, erbs etc.

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        11.21.09, 07:31 AM Flag
      • You assume that because you hear the rumors spread by all the people in new york city who want just another excuse as to why it is so hard to get into schools: because dumb connected kids get in. Just not true. Our two schools only allowed a few connected families in a year, all of them qualified, and if they can't cut it they are counseled out like everyone else

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        11.21.09, 08:25 AM Flag
        • my point was that i wouldn't be "waiting for you to fail." if in fact your child didn't get in, i wouldn't be happy in any way. i'm not sure why you're so bothered by the false impressions people have. ok so i thought your child had more of a shot than he/she does. i do know sibs and legs who have gotten dinged, and the the children are fantastic. what i'm trying to say is that i know this process is stressful for you, and i hope you don't make it harder on yourself by concerning yourself with what other people think of you

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          11.21.09, 08:49 AM Flag
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