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Really unhappy in our public G&T. Regretting that we gave up private options. Do you think there will be spaces in higher grades that open up again this year at private schools?
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I really don't want to name the school. Many very happy and loyal families, but I have the strong sense that we just share different values and we seem to care a lot more about things like community, social graces/manners, coherent curriculum, etc. Anyone who raises these issues is told to fuck off to private school and we'd like to.
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OP: I am not trying to pick a fight, but I honestly believe that some folks think because it's free and public, we have to accept shit that, to me, is not acceptable for children. I don't mind if other parents don't care about it, but I hate feeling like we're breaking some unwritten code of silence because we don't think skipping math for a year or screaming at kids for making mistakes is ok.
[ Reply | Options ]I am very sure you are being seen as obnoxious and you just don't realize it. Yes, maybe the school is not a right fit for you because things are supposed to be done in different ways.
[ Reply | Options ]OP: please, for the most part we've been totally quiet about our feelings. I just listen to parents rationalizing horrible things all the time because they like being at a prestigious school. We have not been vocal, and we agree we don't fit in.
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it sounds like you think you're better than everyone else (you have social graces, they don't). in which case, you're probably better off at private.
[ Reply | Options ]I was actually referring to whether or not children are encouraged to be polite to one another and teachers in the classroom and at school. Building positive interactions in the classrooms is important, imho. I certainly was not saying that other parents don't have social graces.
[ Reply | Options ]so you're basically saying other people's kids are such rude little brats they need etiquette lessons stat.
[ Reply | Options ]so you're basically trying to pick a fight. I was worried about the class exclusivity of private schools, but I am much more concerned with the uber competitive environment where parents literally FORCE their kids to play chess, take piano lessons and ask them "who's in the highest reading group" "who's the best at math in your class" etc. It's sick and the kids imitate this behavior.
[ Reply | Options ]you'll find this everywhere. at gen eds and privates too, though particularly at g&ts. which are the worst of both worlds. the crazy dog-eat-dog mentality of umc public parents with the entitlement of private parents.
[ Reply | Options ]np; my dc is at a so called tt and I don't know anyone who's focused on competition and ask those q'ns. If anything, I am surprised at how low key people are about academics. They're having their kids take tons of music/sports lessons but not academics. Maybe bec the school is so gentle in the lower grades?
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Sorry that you are not happy. Think that getting a spot in an off year next year at privates is going to be harder than usual, primarily because it appears that many accepted more students than usual. Call parents league, maybe, too, think about testing your child again for g&t, could get a different school if he or she tests in.
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We switched to private. Did not love the curriculum there, so boring. Also, lots of shouting etc by aides and support staff in school. Teachers were so so.
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K onwards. There were some nice teachers, but the general atmosphere of school was like Gulag workcamp. Lots of lining up, shuffling around, sitting down for hours doing worksheets. My dc used to not want to go into classroom in the morning. Had lots of friends etc, but was so bored by the way the work was taught. After the shift, much happier. Class size the same, specials, the same, but just different approach to teaching and learning. $$ though. Sigh.
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HIJACK: Do all the G&T's have a "love it or leave it" mentality among the parents?
[ Reply | Options ]i think there are a lot of entitled parents at g&ts. did you see the post earlier from the nest parent who was incensed a teacher suggested her dc should have a few playdates now and then? the nerve!
[ Reply | Options ]i think it's that way at many public schools. no one likes the whining, pita parents for whom nothing is ever good enough and who never have solutions only endless problems.
[ Reply | Options ]np: Not true. Some things bother many parents when they first come and offers of changes and solutions are always unanswered. The prime example being winter recess, or lack of it any time the weather hits 40 degrees or there is any moisture in the air, which leaves them inside all winter. Tons of suggestions were made for activities inside, parents are keen to volunteer. Also, no such luck. Even worse parents have donated tons of G-rated shows and movies in a hope they can break the cycle of showing Chicken Little over and over all winter long. Alas, no such luck and after a couple years most parents either give up and learn to live with it or leave.
[ Reply | Options ]you obviously have a stupid bone to pick. rational parents realize that resources and space require that dcs watch 20 minutes of magic school bus and that this will not kill their dc. quit sputtering and find a real problem to solve.
[ Reply | Options ]Stupid to you, means a lot to my kid to get to go outside and run around. And for a number of classmates, who admittedly behave much better when recess happens. If teachers were actually in charge of recess kids would be out a lot more than they are, but they are not and the aides don't want to be out in the cold. And I would be thrilled if they watched magic school bus, but in spite of having donated a bunch of them the kids only watch Chicken Little with Lion King 1 1/2 thrown in very ocassionally. The same 20 minutes of it every day too, since that's how the timing works.
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why wont you say the school? its anonymous and you may be able to solicit the attention of BTDT parents.
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well, obviously. no one who could afford private would send dc to ps11. it's gotta be a citywide or lower lab.
[ Reply | Options ]I thought NEST but they wouldn't forego math. And I doubt it's Lab, my dc is there and I have never witnessed any screaming at all -- not even in the cafeteria. Can't be Anderson.....??
[ Reply | Options ]I presume you are being sarcastic. We could afford private but LOVE the ps 11 G and T. There are other parents with kids in our class who could also afford it.
[ Reply | Options ]the difference between a school like 41 or 234, where rich parent involvement for years and years has meant the creme de la creme of teachers and staff developers, plenty of attention from elected officials (see the green roof at 41 and annex at 234), not to mention money pouring in like water, and a start-up like ps11 g&t is night and day. the fact that there are some crazy rich parents sending dcs to ps11 because it is a g&t and therefore must be better means nothing. absolutely nothing.
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Op, you've started a ridiculous guessing frenzy. Pls state school so as to absolve others that it's not. This board is to help you but others people here are invested in getting information too.
[ Reply | Options ]This sounds so much like our experience that it's almost eerie: right down to the details of no math and screaming. Left for private for HS, wish wish WISH that we had done it sooner. Only advantage is that I think ninth grade is a relatively easy entry point. Good luck, OP, and sympathy.
[ Reply | Options ]It is thoroughly irresponsible for the parent to place the entire burden of education on the public school. In a perfect world, that would be alright. But in NYC, the parent needs to be actively involved and supplement the school curriculum with a great deal of independent work at home. Even the best private schools are lacking in a lot of respects. (Signed, TT private school mom of 2).
[ Reply | Options ]god what do you do? The kids go to school and get so much homework already - is this not enough? Do you hire a tutor too? Isn't a tt education fine? What else do they need?
[ Reply | Options ]np: i agree with OR. homework doesn't necessarily translate to a good education. much of it, and what they waste time on during the day, is pointless. parents do need to be involved if they want to make sure their kids leave grammar school knowing the basics: grammar, for example, basic math, etc.
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Thissounds like a stupid fake post. You can't say anythign more specific than "skipping math for a year" for fear you'll out the school i.e. yourselves? pathetic. more like, fake. otherwise, you are pathetic and your post says more about you than the school. good riddance!
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