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  • Sometimes I love my kid so much it hurts my heart. Does anyone else find the love for a child terrifying?

    27 replies [ Reply | Watch | Options ]
    11.04.09, 05:59 PM [ Flag ]

    • only when i have to fly w/out dc and hit seriously scary turbulence. i've been known to scream and cry because the thought of dc going on without me terrifies me to no end.

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      11.04.09, 06:03 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]

      • Yes, in fact I was thinking that this might be the key difference (not better vs worse) between SAHM vs WOHM. When you work in the grown-up world you actually get a break from the intense child-centric myopic focus. Not a helicopter parent, but intensely sensitive to their feelings and experiencing things as they happen everyday.

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        11.04.09, 06:17 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]

        • ITA agree with this.

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          11.04.09, 06:24 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]

        • I don't know. I am a SAHM and whenever my DC falls down or hurts himself, I feel bad for him but it's not the end of the world. I don't verbalize it, but I think, "Come on kid, buck up, it couldn't have hurt that bad." Maybe it's b/c I see him fall down 100x a day and I take him for granted - to an extent? Gosh, I sound like a monster compared to these other moms.

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          11.04.09, 07:18 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]

        • I was WOHM with my first and more intensely sensitive to every little aspect of his emotions than I am now as a SAHM with my second two children. However, I totally understand the love my kid so much it hurts feeling. I am over the top with it. But I think I am a little numbed to some details because I am so overwhelmed with kid duties every day whereas when I was WOHM I ate up every moment that I had with my baby.

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          11.04.09, 08:35 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]

      • Yes, this is the worst feeling.

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        11.04.09, 08:25 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]

    • Yes ! Sometimes when I'm away from her and I blink I see her smiling face. She's our first and the intensity I feel about her can actually take my breath away. I sometimes wonder if it's so intense because it took us so long and she's under a year. Does it fade with time ?

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      11.04.09, 06:39 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]

    • I know exactly what you mean. I SAH everyday with my wonderful dd and love her so much it does hurt. It's the only time you can feel like your heart is walking around outside of your body. It is amazing, terrifying, and exhausting.

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      11.04.09, 06:41 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]

      • i totally agree. ds is 11 months old and we talk about him and look at pictures of him after he goes to bed. dh and i just smile at each other and melt over every adorable little thing. it shocks us. we never thought we were melodramatic mushy people like this.

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        11.04.09, 07:10 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]

    • No, but I do find people who talk like this to be a bit melodramatic

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      11.04.09, 07:08 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]

      • thank you. somebody who is not gushing all over the keyboard.

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        11.04.09, 07:12 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]

        • Oh come on. No one is saying their dc are superlative, just their dc. If you can't hang up your cynacism and admit to being mushy gushy over your dc then honestly you're either Christopher Hitchens or need to check for a pulse.

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          11.04.09, 07:25 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]

      • Thank God someone else thought this!

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        11.04.09, 07:45 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]

      • ITA. Get real. I find the melodrama to be insincere, like the moms are trying to convince themselves that everything is perfect when life isn't perfect and there are good days and bad. I can only hang out with "real" moms.

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        11.05.09, 04:13 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]

    • erm, no. sounds like a kitschy country song here.

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      11.04.09, 07:24 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]

    • God, every single day, and I have a teenager. It's crazy and wonderful but yes--scary. I guess you just get used to living in a constant state of terror.

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      11.04.09, 07:30 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]

    • Sometimes I can't stand them, too.

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      11.04.09, 09:03 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]

    • "I love her so much it hurts my heart" is something I say all the time, and mean very much.

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      11.04.09, 09:16 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]

      • My therapist told me that once you have a kid, you will never experience a day or night completely free of fear, and I think that's true. Not to be paranoid, but the only test I really don't want to face is god forbid something happening to my kid. If it weren't for the other ones, I don't know if I could go on...

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        11.05.09, 01:58 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]

    • this is a beautiful thread. yes...I am a WOHM and I feel like this every day. close my eyes and see my DS and just get a stomachache because I miss him and am so happy to have him! I love him more than I ever thought it was humanly possible to love. and hes only 1 !

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      11.05.09, 04:24 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
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