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  • I am hating myself and my life right now. I can't stand to be a SAHM anymore. I can't deal with the incessant meltdowns and tantrums, on top of sleep deprivation and a baby who won't ever nap. I have been trying to get a job for the past 6 months, but I can't find anything. We don't have the money for a sitter or a nanny, so there's nothing to be done until I find work. I am so overwhelmed.

    13 replies [ Reply | Watch | Options ]
    11.03.09, 12:11 PM [ Flag ]

    • Do you have any family nearb or take take the baby for a couple of hours a day or maybe 1 day a week? Sounds like you needs some time to yourself.

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      11.03.09, 12:17 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]

    • I'm sorry. SAHM is one of the hardest jobs in the world. I know you will find a job eventually, but in the meantime could your husband watch the kids while you take "you time" for a weekend or could you drop them off with family for a while? Trade a few hours with another mom? You need a break.

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      11.03.09, 12:23 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]

      • "I'm sleep deprived and about to snap. Want to leave your kids with me so I can take a break later and leave mine with you?" Actually, it's a great idea, but I think it can only be done with a very good friend or an already established coop circle.

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        11.03.09, 12:58 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]

        • Actually I think this is how friendships are made. Go for it. By the way I could never be SAHM for exactly the reasons you cited, so I wholeheartedly appreciate the truth in your words.

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          11.03.09, 01:20 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]

    • I really feel for you. I am a sahm who is not looking to go back to work, but I've also had a hard time. are there any opportunities for support? friends? teenage mother's helpers that might charge very little and would like the babysitting experience? Please hang in there as it will improve for you.

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      11.03.09, 12:24 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]

    • Do you have any trusted mom friends? Do a mom coop where the kids play each week, one of the moms gets to go out, and the other two take care of the kids. Rotate each week.

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      11.03.09, 12:24 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]

    • First of all, it gets easier. Second of all, find some family/friend help, in the very least other moms to hang out with. Listen to some happy music during the day to take your mind of it. And finally, IMO, there's alway money for a sitter. I'd rather eat toast every day for a week and get myself a babysitter for a couple hours. See if you can find some $ somewhere to hire you some help.

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      11.03.09, 01:09 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]

    • BTDT-- kudos to you for recognizing that being a SAHM is not the thing for you and going back to work. It's responsible.

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      11.03.09, 05:15 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]

    • Honey, I feel your pain and I DO have a regular sitter. Here is my best advice to get through the day: 1) It's no coincidence that bedtime and happy hour are at the same time; 2) You don't have to be perfect; you just have to be good enough; 3) Sleep whenever you can. Everything else can wait; 4) Some days just suck. Some days are great. Try not to get too bummed out by the former and try not to gloat about the latter; 5) Leave the kids home with your husband and go out with some girlfriends--it always makes me feel better. Good luck with everything!

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      11.03.09, 05:20 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]

    • of course there's something that can be done until you find work. you can change your schedule, change your habits, change your attitude. and i know this sounds sancti but i'm saying this from experience. how old is/are dc? how much of a budget are you on?

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      11.03.09, 05:40 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]
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