UrbanBaby - having dinner with an ex-boyfriend (my f...

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having dinner with an ex-boyfriend (my first love) this week, reconnected via facebook. husband happens to be out of town, told him of plans. i'm really, really giddy and excited to go out with ex, more so than with hubby at the moment. is this so wrong?
29 replies
- New York City
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07.14.09, 04:30 PM [ Flag ]
- yup.
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  07.14.09, 04:31 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]
  - yup it is so wrong> why do you say so?
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    07.14.09, 04:35 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]
    - or - thought it was obvious. being more giddy about another guy and going out with him is cheating. you are humiliating your dh and that is not ok.
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      07.14.09, 11:15 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]
- sounds dangerous
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  07.14.09, 04:33 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]
  - i'm kind of loving the dangerous. but i know myself, and i know i could never cheat and still respect myself or my husband.
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    07.14.09, 04:36 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]
    - By cheat I guess you mean 'physical'. If this a one time deal and you know you aren't going to do 'anything', then I guess there's no harm right?
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      07.14.09, 04:39 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]
      - yes, i mean physical. i don't know if it will be a one-time deal though. i feel like we're back in touch as friends. fwiw, hubby is friends with his first love, who was at our wedding.
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        07.14.09, 04:41 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]
    - riiight. yet you allow yourself to set up a dinner date and get "giddy" about it. you're in control. uh huh.
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      07.14.09, 06:14 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]
- someone once said this to me: exes are exes for a reason. keep it in mind before you blow everything up.
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  07.14.09, 04:36 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]
- sounds like fun. since you told dh, I don't think it's wrong.
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  07.14.09, 04:38 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]
  - yeah, that's what i think, thanks!
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    07.14.09, 04:39 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]
    - HA! does he know you're giddy? didn't think so. if you're COMPLETELY honest about it to him and tell him how you feel about the date, and he still gives you the green light, then i guess you're doing nothing wrong.
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      07.14.09, 06:15 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]
      - --let me rephrase...you need to tell dh you're "really, really giddy" (really?) and then see what he says.
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        07.14.09, 06:16 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]
- I did this a few years ago. It was fun. is ex married?
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  07.14.09, 05:04 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]
- I'd be ok with my dw doing that. But it sounds like the line between harmless and not is close at hand.
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  07.14.09, 05:13 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]
- if you're posting about it then it's probably wrong. If you felt totally secure in your own relationship this wouldn't be such a big deal (omg, I totally wrote "suck" instead of "such" BWAHAHAHAHHAA..ahem,,sorry for regressing to age 12). If you're creaming our jeans at the thought then maybe you should just tell dh that you're going to cheat on him..spare him the future grief. (I'm sorry for being harsh, but not sorry for spewing the truth)
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  07.14.09, 05:48 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]
  - I said "spew". BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAA. You're so going to cheat on your dh.
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    07.14.09, 05:48 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]
- um, yes it's wrong. you have to ask???
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  07.14.09, 06:13 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]
- I hope at some point soon a study is released on how many marriages / relationships have been ruined by Facebook.
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  07.14.09, 06:16 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]
  - lol. ita.
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    07.14.09, 10:00 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]
    - in complete agreement with this thought.
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      07.14.09, 11:16 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]
- Based on everything you wrote (hubby out of town, giddiness, more excited about this than going out with ex) it's not just an innocent dinner of friends reconnecting. You're kidding yourself and putting your marriage on the line if you think otherwise.
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  07.14.09, 06:17 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]
- Another reason it might be wrong: if it upsets your husband on some level, weakening your relationship.
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  07.14.09, 07:23 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]
- it's wrong for all the reasons that you intuitively know. too bad it even got to this point.
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  07.14.09, 11:17 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]
- BTDT. very very bad idea. just imagine that old feelings flare up, and you will be totally screwed.
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  07.15.09, 02:17 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
- You ask because you know it is
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  07.15.09, 06:39 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
- This makes me so sad. I love my husband and he is my priority and means the world to me, which is why I married him. This guy is an ex for a reason, isn't he? Why would you be excited? If he dumped you then he wasn't worth it, and if you dumped him and married someone else, doesn't that say something?
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  07.15.09, 06:40 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
  - itta
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    07.15.09, 06:50 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
    - I am happy to be with my husband and AWAY from my exes... or I would have married them! Ick, the selfishness of this woman makes me shudder. Getting married is a choice, and a promise. That's what that whole vow things was about. Jeez.
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      07.15.09, 06:58 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]

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having dinner with an ex-boyfriend (my first love) this week, reconnected via facebook. husband happens to be out of town, told him of plans. i'm really, really giddy and excited to go out with ex, more so than with hubby at the moment. is this so wrong?

yup.

yup it is so wrong> why do you say so?

or - thought it was obvious. being more giddy about another guy and going out with him is cheating. you are humiliating your dh and that is not ok.

sounds dangerous

i'm kind of loving the dangerous. but i know myself, and i know i could never cheat and still respect myself or my husband.

By cheat I guess you mean 'physical'. If this a one time deal and you know you aren't going to do 'anything', then I guess there's no harm right?

yes, i mean physical. i don't know if it will be a one-time deal though. i feel like we're back in touch as friends. fwiw, hubby is friends with his first love, who was at our wedding.

riiight. yet you allow yourself to set up a dinner date and get "giddy" about it. you're in control. uh huh.

someone once said this to me: exes are exes for a reason. keep it in mind before you blow everything up.

sounds like fun. since you told dh, I don't think it's wrong.

yeah, that's what i think, thanks!

HA! does he know you're giddy? didn't think so. if you're COMPLETELY honest about it to him and tell him how you feel about the date, and he still gives you the green light, then i guess you're doing nothing wrong.

--let me rephrase...you need to tell dh you're "really, really giddy" (really?) and then see what he says.

I did this a few years ago. It was fun. is ex married?

I'd be ok with my dw doing that. But it sounds like the line between harmless and not is close at hand.

I said "spew". BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAA. You're so going to cheat on your dh.

um, yes it's wrong. you have to ask???

I hope at some point soon a study is released on how many marriages / relationships have been ruined by Facebook.

lol. ita.

in complete agreement with this thought.

Based on everything you wrote (hubby out of town, giddiness, more excited about this than going out with ex) it's not just an innocent dinner of friends reconnecting. You're kidding yourself and putting your marriage on the line if you think otherwise.

Another reason it might be wrong: if it upsets your husband on some level, weakening your relationship.

it's wrong for all the reasons that you intuitively know. too bad it even got to this point.

BTDT. very very bad idea. just imagine that old feelings flare up, and you will be totally screwed.

You ask because you know it is

itta

I am happy to be with my husband and AWAY from my exes... or I would have married them! Ick, the selfishness of this woman makes me shudder. Getting married is a choice, and a promise. That's what that whole vow things was about. Jeez.

UrbanBaby Asks...

Are you expecting something special from your dh for Valentine's Day?

Boards Help

UB Like it's 1776!

Video: Cooking With Grandma Gigi