advertisement
Click Here
On mySimon: Lemony Snicket: Trouble Begins Book Set
Sign up | Log in
new post » see more posts »

  • Parents of college dc: do you have access to dc's grades and med records? I know they are supposed to be adults, but yesterday at dinner my friends said their ds came home with a "D" in chem. Now his hope for a medschool is history, not because he is intellectually incapable, but b/c he was overwhelmed by college freedom. I am terrified. Thoughts?

    17 replies [ Reply | Watch | Options ]
    06.06.09, 07:18 AM [ Flag ]

    • He can re-take chem at a different school. Don't be ridiculous.

      [ Reply | Options ]
      06.06.09, 07:26 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]

      • yes, and he is doing that this summer: but it is not the point. Should I have access to dd grades whe she goes to college this fall? And her medical records?

        [ Reply | Options ]
        06.06.09, 07:27 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]

        • It depends on your relationship with your dd. Do you trust her? What's been her MO to date? Is she responsible? Conscientious? Self-motivated? A social butterfly? Some kids are ready to navigate the freedoms, others will trip on them.

          [ Reply | Options ]
          06.06.09, 07:30 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]

          • She is not a social butterfly, but definitely not self-motivated. Seeing examples of some kids who do poorly their first semester and can't recover to a decent GPA, or lose scholarship scares me. Any tips?

            [ Reply | Options ]
            06.06.09, 12:15 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]

        • why do you need access to her medical records? I don't even have "access" to dd's medical records and she's in high school. If the doctor knows something she thinks I need to know, I assume she'll tell me

          [ Reply | Options ]
          06.06.09, 07:37 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]

          • My mom never wanted access to my medical records or my grades. This is HER business now--she is an adult--let her grow up and learn about life--it's the greatest gift you can give her.

            [ Reply | Options ]
            06.06.09, 07:54 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]

            • right. so you're agreeing with me or intended to respond to OP?

              [ Reply | Options ]
              06.06.09, 07:56 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]

              • I'm agreeing with you, previous poster, and answering OP's question. If a parent needs to know about something medical, kid will tell them. If they get a D in Chemistry, the kid knows they were goofing off. College is to be on your own and learn about consequences. Some parents refuse to cut the apron strings, which isn't good.

                [ Reply | Options ]
                06.06.09, 08:01 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]

                • OP: she is bright and talented and was given a once-in-a-lifetime chance by getting into a great school. If she blows it, because she is only 17 and gets overwhelmed with freedom, I do not want her to ask me later why as a parent I was not involved. Some mistakes are NOT correctable as much as all the books and movies want us to think so. That includes getting pregnant or infected with HIV. Anybody with me here?

                  [ Reply | Options ]
                  06.06.09, 12:10 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]

                  • Have you talked seriously with her about the types of self-responsibility she'll have to be mindful of? Birth control, condoms, study habits, drinking, drugs, your opinions on these matters?

                    [ Reply | Options ]
                    06.06.09, 01:24 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]

        • most likely because of HIPAA you won't have access to her medical records, whatever that means. My parents sure didn't, 20 years ago. and even if you do, it won't keep her from getting pregnant or HIV. Only talking to her will do that. and providing condoms.

          [ Reply | Options ]
          06.10.09, 01:01 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]

    • Whether the grades are sent to you or your DC depends on the college. SUNY considers the students to be adults, hence grades are not sent to parents, so you will have to ask DC. Some private colleges send them to parents.

      [ Reply | Options ]
      06.06.09, 01:08 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]

    • most colleges have online access to grades -- your dd could give you the password -- if she so desires

      [ Reply | Options ]
      06.06.09, 06:21 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]

    • In California we have NO access to grades. It infuriates me.

      [ Reply | Options ]
      06.10.09, 12:45 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]

    • at my private college, parents could fill out a form saying they wanted to see your grades. i may have also had to sign it, i can't remember.

      [ Reply | Options ]
      06.10.09, 12:48 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]

    • Most publics don't give out grades. It's quite possible the dc told thier parents. I know when I was in school, they addressed everything to me, but if your permanent address is still your home, it doesn't take much for a parent to open you mail...

      [ Reply | Options ]
      06.10.09, 01:08 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]

    • And no, you cannot have access to your child's medical records without their written consent.

      [ Reply | Options ]
      06.10.09, 01:09 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]
advertisement
advertisement
Click Here

UrbanBaby Asks...

Are you or your partner ever naked in front of your children?

Already voted? View Results

See previous polls »

Boards Help

Abbreviations
More Boards Help


Flashback