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The neighbor babysitting post now has me wondering if I'm an unfit mother. I sometimes go down to the basement to switch my laundry while DC's are sound asleep napping in the apartment. It usually takes no more than 10 minutes and I always lock the door and hurry back. I only do this when I don't have a babysitter or when my DH is traveling, otherwise I'd do the laundry when they were here. I always take the kids downstairs to sort and put the wash in since that takes longer. Do other people do this? My justification is that it's in the same building, and I'm out of pocket for a shorter amount of time than when I'm taking a shower. Thoughts?
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If a hungry escaped circus tiger broke into your building and tried to eat your DCs while you were in the basement, you wouldn't be able to get to them. Shame on you for doing laundry. Clearly you loathe your children and should be sterilized and then reported to DSS for child cruelty.
[ Reply | Options ]About four years ago I was on my way to the laundry room and heard the little baby across the hall crying her head off. She was about 15 months. It took me a few seconds to realize that she was crying on the other side of her apartment door, all alone. I go downstairs to the laundry room and there was the nanny.
[ Reply | Options ]About 24 hours ago, I got in the shower and my 12 mo was crying her head off in her crib, and did so for my entire shower.
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In this particular case, given that laundry is probably one of nanny's "duties," what would you have her do? Take dc downstairs--stairs or elevator--with a full basket of laundry, detergent, etc. or try to sneak out when she's sleeping? Honestly--I've been lucky enough never to have this particular issue, but I don't know how people do it if y'all consider leaving a sleeping child in an apartment for 7 minutes child abuse.
[ Reply | Options ]OP: this is my point. It's tough to get it all done and maintain your DC's nap schedules (which to me are VERY important for their overall well-being) if you're constantly waking them up and shlepping them down to the laundry room. Other people in the building expect you to empty the machines when your loads are finished. With two little ones, we have to do laundry 3X a week - twice for the kids and once for our own clothes, sheets & towels. It's not always possible to put off doing laundry when your DH needs clean underwear and shirts to wear to work. If I ever have an apartment or house with a W/D, I will feel like I have died and gone to heaven.
[ Reply | Options ]I did when DD was little--right off the bedroom actually--and I felt SO lucky and wondered what people did, schlepping laundry to the basement or to laundromats. All those dirty clothes and the occasional pukey sheets or whatever--ugh! So I really don't know how these folks manage, or expect the nanny to manage.
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of course people do. folks on our block do it all the time. sometimes go to the store or post office. paranoia will destroy ya.
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It's not that bad if your in the same building and gone for less than 15 minutes when they are asleep. As long as the door is locked every time as well. The other post was about a lady leaving her infant unattended and just passing off the monitor to someone else. Monitors get interference and if not listened to closely the baby might not be heard or attended to.
[ Reply | Options ]I've dropped my keys down the elevator shaft. Twice. I wouldn't do this but I think it also depends on DB. If he's at the age where he's starting to sit and/or pull up then I wouldn't leave him unattended (speaking from experience after rushing DB to the ped's office after he fell off the sofa when I went to the kitchen to get a glass of water).
[ Reply | Options ]how high is your sofa?...is your floor made of jagged rocks?...what could've happened that required rushing to a doctor?...keys down the elecator shaft twice is rather impressive
[ Reply | Options ]FTM (can't you tell?) gitters. Once was when I was a kid, though - does that count?
[ Reply | Options ]ok, i'll let the keys slide then...i have two boys, 2 & 5, and they've spent the majority of their lives with bumps and bruises all over themselves, including all kinds of head contusions and a couple of broken teeth...you're going to have to get used to it...here's a heads up, at some point you will encounter a head-on collision that results in a cartoon-episode like lump on the head...don't panic, but do put ice on...DB will be fine
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wow. mine fell down an entire flight of stairs and i didn't rush her to the peds.
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I've dropped my keys down the elevator shaft also! This post is freaking me out. I would never do this. So many unforeseen things can arise. Living in an apt. is not the same thing as living in a house. You are communally living with other people and really have not idea what they are up to. Friend's apt. was burned down in the middle of the night by a crazy neighbor. What if you couldn't get back upstairs etc.
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This is fine. Again, think back the McMansion example. If you lived in a massive house in the 'burbs you would likely be in several situations where you are far from your DC. This is not unreasonable.
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^^^ but you'd smell smoke, or hear the fire alarm, in a McMansion. And not potentially be stuck in an elevator. Or 11 floor away in the basement.
[ Reply | Options ]maybe, maybe not. and in an apartment building, you can choose to take the stairs. might suck running up those stairs, but for your DC, I bet you can do it.
[ Reply | Options ]yeah - IF YOU KNEW that your apartment was on fire. Which you wouldn't, being in the basement.
[ Reply | Options ]Well, you would hear the fire alarm, in which case, I bet you would high tail it to your apartment.
[ Reply | Options ]More likely to have helpful neighbors in an apartment building than in isolated McMansion. No one hears your screams in a McMansion. And the police are 15 minutes away. I think everyone who lives in the' burbs ought to be prosecuted for child endangerment.
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Given the whole range of answers here, conclusion is that you should just use your best judgement. And know that some other mothers totally agree, and others will think you are crazy. So, make your own choice and be confident in it.
[ Reply | Options ]You're not alone. Occasionally, while my DB is asleep in the crib, I have stepped outside to take my dog out (fortunately, she goes within a few feet of our bldg). I feel bad doing it (my main concern is that I wouldn't be able to get back into the apt in case of a fire), but sometimes I opt to do it because the dog needs to go out and DH is out of town or working very, very late. Yes, the dog probably could wait for DH or I could ask a neighbor to come over while I take the dog out, but it's a calculated risk. As someone else said, I choose not to live in a state of constant fear of what *could* go wrong! Flame away about how I love my dog more than I love DB.
[ Reply | Options ]won't flame. we've all been there. my biggest fear used to be that something would happen to me in the street.
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I won't, but I will say I know of two men who were held up on their very doorstep of their small apartment buildings with guns, taking out the trash. In Brooklyn. You may not live in Brooklyn, and I'm not saying its not safe there, but &*#$ happens. I am a little overly safety conscious but that freaked me out. Their partners/babies were right upstairs. One wife heard it all, one didn't even know.
[ Reply | Options ]So...the moral of the story is...don't take out the trash? Or walk your dog? I don't get it.
[ Reply | Options ]Don't do it leaving your baby alone in the house. Duh. At least the other parent was upstairs. What if one of them had done this while alone and gotten seriously injured or something?
[ Reply | Options ]Well, exactly. The other parent was still upstairs. If you have a gun in your face, you're probably not overly worried about a possible fire in your baby's room. Are you saying the situation would've been better if the dad had been holding the baby while taking out the trash? Someone is my neighborhood WAS just robbed at gunpoint last week while walking his dog with the baby in a snugli. My point--bad, crazy sh*t does happen, but not predictably or, thank heavens, too frequently. And I think the above poster has a point--better to leave sleeping baby upstairs for five minutes while dog pees OR navigate stairs, door,etc. with antsy dog and baby? She could fall down and squash the baby and then you all would be saying "ooh--that was so stupid." We all have to make judgements and I'd think that most moms on this board are pretty capable of deciding for themselves what makes sense.
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Don't do it. I would never, ever do it. You can rationalize it, and it will probably be fine, but it is NOT worth the risk -- what if something happens to you, what if DC (or more than one? yeesh, what ages?) wakes up and chokes or something that you would have heard but two minutes late is too late, what if there is a fire, a blackout, a lost key, a robbery... DO NOT DO THIS EVER, it;s foolish.
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