05.27.09, 12:40 PM 23 replies
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Sigh. Why doesn't DH ever step up and offer to arrange for babysitting coverage when we have weekend plans??? I realize that I have the contact info for most of out babysitters, but he doesn't even offer.

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05.27.09, 12:40 PM Flag ]
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  • Sigh. Why doesn't DH ever step up and offer to arrange for babysitting coverage when we have weekend plans??? I realize that I have the contact info for most of out babysitters, but he doesn't even offer.

    23 replies [ Reply | Watch | More
    05.27.09, 12:40 PM Flag ]
    • because he thinks its your job since you always do it. if you want him to do it ask him. he's not a mind reader.

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      05.27.09, 12:41 PM Flag
    • because you have the contact info and probably set it up most of the time, so it is pretty much your task?

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      05.27.09, 12:41 PM Flag
    • oh, god. way to look for something to complain about. who made the actual weekend plans? who's paying for your dinner or theater ticket or whatever? just call the effing sitter and be glad you are getting taken out.

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      05.27.09, 12:43 PM Flag
      • np - Even when I take DH out, I have to plan for sitter coverage. In fact, its usually me paying, and usually me arranging. And I agree with posters above that its because I always do it, that DH doesn't. In my case, DH even has suggestions on the kind of sitter and what to tell her/ask her, but totally refuses to participate. I always have to counteract with 'you have some great ideas. Do you want to set it up?' To which his response is 'No, you do it'.

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        05.27.09, 12:49 PM Flag
        • good grief, it's a phone call. you people!

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          05.27.09, 12:51 PM Flag
      • oh shut up. WE got an email inviting us to a bday party. HE is not paying for anything. And I feel sorry for you if you feel grateful anytime you "get taken out" by a man.

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        05.27.09, 12:55 PM Flag
        • i feel sorry for you if you feel the need to bitch every time you are expected to do something. i am taken out by enough men often enough not to feel "grateful." on the other hand, i am not a bitter, scorekeeping shrew such as yourself.

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          05.27.09, 12:58 PM Flag
        • ^^^ and the party is for one of DH's work friends. It would just be nice for him to offer to call/email someone. I have asked him to help out (e.g., help me think of other people we can call) in the past when I struck out on our regular babysitter, but he just shrugs and claims ignorance.

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          05.27.09, 12:59 PM Flag
    • A dh: this seems like one of those division of labor things which should not be an issue.

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      05.27.09, 12:46 PM Flag
      • op is the type of wife who is never satisfied. if the dh tried to arrange childcare, she'd bitch about how he did it or whom he'd chosen.

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        05.27.09, 12:48 PM Flag
        • OR: in all fairness, Jenna Jamison seems unqualified.

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          05.27.09, 12:54 PM Flag
    • Are you serious? DH barely knows how much our mortgage is, much less contact information for babysitters.

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      05.27.09, 12:47 PM Flag
    • you've moved into the place in your marriage where this has been defined as your role. revel in it.

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      05.27.09, 12:52 PM Flag
    • Sigh. Why doesn't DW ever step up and offer to clean the gutters or install the air conditioners? I realize that I have the know-how to do this stuff, but she doesn't even offer.

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      05.27.09, 12:54 PM Flag
    • I am very sure he'll be happy to oblige if you just asked him to make the call.

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      05.27.09, 12:59 PM Flag
      • ITTA. It would be stupidly impractical and petty, but I'm sure he'd do it. Why oh why must women insist that men read their minds??

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        05.27.09, 01:01 PM Flag
    • Me: Darling, would you mind calling a sitter for Friday night? DH: Sure, but I don't have their phone numbers. Me: Here they are. DH: OK, calling... wait who do we want/how much do we pay/how long will we be out/what is DS's bedtime routine/what do I ask the sitter/what if she's not available/how old is DS again? Me: Oh forget it, I'll do it.

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      05.27.09, 01:01 PM Flag
      • that's what you get for not involving your DH a little more in rearing your children

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        05.27.09, 01:12 PM Flag
        • Wow. Okay. Do you seriously not see that this is supposed to be funny? Did you actually believe DH doesn't know how old DS is? Yeesh, people.

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          05.27.09, 01:15 PM Flag
    • Honestly I find I worry less when I make the arrangements because there is certain things I make sure are said and done before I go and if I left it to him I would just worry the whole time.

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      05.27.09, 01:12 PM Flag
    • OP: OK, here I am with my tail between my legs. I DID ask DH if he would share the responsibility of arranging a babysitter and, after a few defensive responses about what that was supposed to mean, was he not pulling his weight, etc. (this was via email), he realized my request was pretty simple (and not code for something else) and he said he would. Problem solved.

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      05.27.09, 01:47 PM Flag
    • DH not only found the sitter, but made the $ hourly arrangement with her, and contacts her each time we need her. He found I wouldn't bother making plans to go out b/c of all the planning involved. Oh, yes, he also does all the food shopping and laundry!

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      05.27.09, 01:49 PM Flag
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