05.27.09, 12:20 PM 24 replies
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What views expressed on UB (generally, not by trolls) do you totally disagree with completely? me: That a nanny should be allowed to do anything a mom would do, like shopping with kids.

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05.27.09, 12:20 PM Flag ]
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  • What views expressed on UB (generally, not by trolls) do you totally disagree with completely? me: That a nanny should be allowed to do anything a mom would do, like shopping with kids.

    24 replies [ Reply | Watch | More
    05.27.09, 12:20 PM Flag ]
    • Well, I rarely shop with my kids so the kids don't shop with the sitter.

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      05.27.09, 12:22 PM Flag
    • The general view that there is only one "right" way to do things, and anyone that doesn't do things my way is wrong.

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      05.27.09, 12:23 PM Flag
      • op- Well that's true for a lot of issues on UB. I have a hard time believing that in real life the women on here have such a strong view on the 'way' about anything.

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        05.27.09, 12:25 PM Flag
    • I disagree when posters say they do not want to have more than 1 kid because they may not get along with each other. I'm ok with not having more than one kid, but the reason people have more than 1 kid is so that they learn (are forced to learn) to live together with the good and the bad. We were three kids growing up and fought all the time. We are good friends now, but thats besides the point. I learned to fight fair, stand up for myself, and deal with my siblings without running to mom/dad all the time. Built character, more than anything else.

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      05.27.09, 12:24 PM Flag
      • You do understand that only children can do all of those things, too, right? I swear, some of you treat us like we're socially handicapped.

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        05.27.09, 12:26 PM Flag
        • Thats not my point. My point is why not to have kids = because they may not get along, is just wrong. You can have an only kid because thats what you want, want to give extra attention, want the special relationship etc. -OR

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          05.27.09, 12:32 PM Flag
          • That's not why I want to have only one child. DH and I simply do not want more, that's all. Just like there are moms out there that want 8 kids, there are moms out there that only want one. There doesn't have to be a financial reason, or because we want to spoil them with attention/resources, or be their BFF, I JUST WANT ONE.

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            05.27.09, 12:37 PM Flag
            • ^BTW, I think the argument is backwards. No one ever said "I don't want to have two kids because they might not get along." What I've heard/read is: "Just because you have > 1 kid, it doesn't mean they'll get along," and it's usually in response to someone saying that only children will grow up lonely and without someone special in their lives.

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              05.27.09, 12:40 PM Flag
            • or- I agree with your reasons, and your reasons are your own, not needing any justification. It's just some justifications that I find to be totally misguided.

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              05.27.09, 12:44 PM Flag
    • You should only hire "qualified" nannies (read: white) that command $30/hour rates because only they are capable of caring for your children. My nanny is a loving, wonderful nanny, and I wouldn't trade her for the world, college diploma or no.

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      05.27.09, 12:25 PM Flag
      • op- I also disagree with the alternate view that you can only call said 'qualified' nanny a nanny. Otherwise she is a sitter. If I have outsourced my childcare to one individual, then she is the nanny.

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        05.27.09, 12:27 PM Flag
        • Yup, I forgot about that. "You're not hiring a nanny, you're hiring a babysitter." I roll my eyes every time I see that.

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          05.27.09, 12:31 PM Flag
    • Tell me why you disagree with this view. I cringe a bit when my nanny tells me about the errands she runs with my DB, but then I think, I do that all the time when I am home with DB, so why should there be a double standard? (Yes, I know she is getting paid to be with DB, and I am not, but still, I so not want to dictate every aspect of my nanny's day.) Plus, I think it's good for DB to tag along on errands if it means she learns that the world does not revolve around her.

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      05.27.09, 12:25 PM Flag
      • ITA with your last sentence.

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        05.27.09, 12:27 PM Flag
      • op- Because I do not think a nanny has the same interests, and the same judgment as a mom. I've grown up with a nanny and have employed one for my DC as well, and while I trust her with DC unquestioningly, I do not believe she will make the same judgments I will make re DC's mental development. I do not expect her to never stop entertaining DC. I know she has quiet time for 1hr when DC have to play/read to themselves, while she does what she wants = read magazines. But while a nanny may be inclined to keep a child strapped to a stroller for 1-1.5 hrs while doing some quick shopping at an overcrowded loehman's, few moms will do that. If my dc are restless, I will leave the store after a while and postpone shopping till later. Nanny will not do that. She will rather give the child a snack to keep them distracted in the stroller while her shopping takes precedence. And when can she shop? Same time I shop! After my work hours are done!

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        05.27.09, 12:38 PM Flag
    • when do you expect these people to run errands, and why does the world have to revolve around your child?

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      05.27.09, 12:30 PM Flag
      • hm, let's think ... saturday, sunday, and after work. occasionally on the way to work (DReade).

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        05.27.09, 08:41 PM Flag
    • SAHMs sit around all day, WOHMs are not raising their own children.

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      05.27.09, 12:31 PM Flag
      • ^Although it's usually the trolls that say the most outrageous things about each set of moms.

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        05.27.09, 12:32 PM Flag
      • op- I agree that that these extreme views are paid trolls.

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        05.27.09, 12:34 PM Flag
        • PAID trolls! You people are ridiculous. trolls are bored people at work just trying to get a rise out of you. Trolls aren't paid, they cause issues for fun.

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          05.27.09, 12:41 PM Flag
          • How do you figure they are bored people at work? I always imagined a 12-15yo having come upon the site and saying weird things to see what responses they got.

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            05.27.09, 12:45 PM Flag
            • a 12-15 yo would not come to this sight and understand how to heat up discussions around SAHM vs. WOHM. Please.

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              05.27.09, 12:58 PM Flag
    • I was very upset by the insistent postings a month or so ago about people expecting babysitting arrangements near weddings they were attending. We live in the US without any relatives so if we travel to another US city for a wedding and its a no kids allowed wedding, AND there is no on-site babysitting, we can almost guarantee we cannot make it. DC are too young to go willingly to a strange babysitter. And putting everyone in so much stress so that the bride and groom can enjoy their day and our company is not worth it. OK if they gracefully accept our not attending though, and we usually send gifts no matter what.

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      05.27.09, 01:00 PM Flag
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