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Thoughts on this: My mom is trying to come up with her "grandmother name" as her first grandchild (my db) is due soon. She is adamant she doesn't want to be Grand-something, Nana, Mimi, etc - we are of mixed background so there is no cultural name to use. She has decided she likes "Mumble", I have no idea why, but it just seems like a strange thing to call your grandmother. Now, I know a lot of dc's just come up with a name on their own, but it is usually somehow related to what the parents call the grandparent...
82 replies [ Reply | Watch | Options ]op - my mom is actually not a baby boomer (just before, she's 65), and she's not self absorbed, just doesn't have a desire to be Grandma, and isn't the typical bake cookies and cuddle sort of person. I don't have a problem with that at all, personally, my grandmother was the same way when i was a kid, we have a fantastic relationship and I adore her.
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I just went through this process with my parents and the whole thing was stupid and annoying.
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So the OR was trying to commiserate and give you some support, and you got all defensive on her ass. Why bother posting this on UB if you have no capacity to hear gently ribbing of your mother's ridiculousness about this? Just my opinion.
[ Reply | Options ]op - I don't think the OR was getting my post at all - there's a difference between not wanting to be called grandma, and being self absorbed, that was my only point. My mom is great, very involved and lovely, but just wants a different name - and I agree it is somewhat ridiculous.
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I like her choice-and it is her choice. She sounds smart too, as ms and bs are among the earliest sounds usually generated by typically developing infants. Let your mom choose and get used to it when talking to your kid. Just remember to let your child hear you address your mother as you already do.
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OOOOOOOH. Can you remember where you saw this article?????? I need to send it to my father, STAT!
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here is one that would be perfect for your father. http://online.wsj.com/article/SB123267094948408359.html
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here is one ofthe articles. sorry, but your mom is exhibit A. http://online.wsj.com/article/SB123267094948408359.html
[ Reply | Options ]here is the article to which i was referring. http://online.wsj.com/article/SB123267094948408359.html
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op - ok, I absolutely agree it isn't great. I call my mother "Mum" (her mother is British) and she says she thought of it because my father, who is hard of hearing, tells her she mumbles all the time
[ Reply | Options ]np: the hard part is not what dc's call her, but that you will forever after be referring to your mother as Mumble. What about just going with "Mum" since you'll be mommy?
[ Reply | Options ]I've thought about mumsmum or mumum or something like that. Maybe if she really wants to go with Mumble I can get dc to shorten it to Mum?
[ Reply | Options ]just keep calling her mum - until dc's talk, i don;t think she'll insist on YOU referring to her differently, maybe by then something else will come up. most dcs name their grandparents soemthing else anyway - my MIL has 2 different names bc that's what the difft grandkids came up w when they first learned to talk.
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My mom chose the first letter of her name as the name she would like to be called. A friend named Nancy chose for her grandkids to call her "Nan".
[ Reply | Options ]op - MIL's name is Mamoo, which is a bastardization of her name, and a French form of grandmother, but she is French
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I used to call my grandmother Gram Cracker. I also had a older relative we called Bopsie
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I have to say, I'm finding this thread mildly disturbing and not just a little bit irksome. A generation of children growing up, unable to call their damned Grandmother "Grandma", or "Gramma", or whatever, but rather having to say "Nancy", or "Mumbles" or some other ridiculous thing in order to meet the needs of their grandmother who apparently isn't facing this new transition well.
[ Reply | Options ]np - seriously? most people I know in my generation call their grandparents a whole variety of things.
[ Reply | Options ]Not me. Beyond Grandma, Mamah, Nana, Grammy, Gram etc. I don't know many at all. I'll admit that Muzzie and Gram Cracker and Bopsie are all adorable and retain the FEEL of a grandmother, but I don't think that's the reason many refuse it. They simply can't transition to being a Grand parent because it feels 'old'. And I find that sad and sort of transparent.
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She;s overthinking. In our case my firstborn came up with a name and that's what stuck. She has no choice
[ Reply | Options ]Mumble is cute and unique! MY dd has a "grammy" and a "mimi" - blech. I applaud your mom wanting to be her own kind of grandparent. Can I ask why it bothers you? Of course I grew up with a "Muzzie" who I adore, so maybe I'm biased. Is it really a big deal? What someone calls you is pretty personal and I think she should have the right to determine it and "be" who she wants to her grandchildren.
[ Reply | Options ]op- It doesn't really bother me, per se - I guess I think she's being 1) a little premature (db is due in the fall) and 2)maybe trying too hard to come up with something very unique
[ Reply | Options ]Oh, I get it now. Pretty early, you're right, but it's kind of cute that she's so excited. Now I keep thinking about what I would do if I could choose my own name rather than the one my parents gave me! :)
[ Reply | Options ]lol - see, that's a good point! I'm glad she's excited too, and will be happy to let her pick the name she want to be called (as long as I don't absolutely hate it, I don't hate Mumble) - I also just wonder if a child will NEVER be able to say Mumble and will completely bastardize it to something else. Maybe Bumble?
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np: My mom (with whom I really don't get along) didn't want the usual names. She's of Irish descent, and my dad is of Polish descent. So, she chose the Polish word, "babcia" for grandmother. Except, she insists it's "Babka", so my kids call her by that, even though that's not the correct word, she's not even Polish, and it's the name of a pastry! Grrr...
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