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If both you and your husband are arguing over circumcising your son, who wins? There is a poster below who says her husband wouldn't have more of a say in it, but ONE of you has got to have more of a say, the kid either gets circumcised or not, someone wins, someone does more of a say!
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Simple. Don't circumcise and continue discussions. You can always circumcise later, but you can't uncircumcise.
[ Reply | Options ]Yes, this is what we did. I didn't want to circ and won out because we could always do it later. There's no medical need to do it, so I didn't feel like I needed to defer to my dh's desire to do it for aesthetic reasons. Even my Jewish friends who did it said that after watching the process, they wouldn't do it again.
[ Reply | Options ]NP: We had a different experience. We did have a medical reason for considering circumcision (DS has a kidney abnormality and there are some studies that suggest circumcision reduces the risk of UTI in children with compromised kidneys). Before the birth, doctors said we could wait and see, but that circumcision is much more traumatic for older infants/children than newborns so we elected to do it within a few days of his birth. No regrets.
[ Reply | Options ]There are some things you should not see. Just turn your head during the ceremony. The truth is (and what no one is admitting) that it is unlikely that DS after living with an uncircumcised penis for many years will decide to have it snipped. He's comfortable the way he is. So in effect we are making the decision for him. That's why I'm having problems with all this "he can decide later" reasoning.
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we discussed it a lot and read all the information out there. then he said, unless our son was gay then a man's opinion was probably not as useful as a woman's opinion, aesthetically. so I polled my friends who'd had the most male partners (women friends and gay man friends just in case, lol) about their opinions of each and why, and in the end we did not circ. there ya go!
[ Reply | Options ]DH here won that discussion. It came down to pure "design aerodynamics". The neccessity debate is irrelevant. Just ask yourself this: Do I want my son to be in the minority with a different shaped penis? How will he handle being a source of curiousity in the locker room?Will his future partners deal with it or want the familiar shape?
[ Reply | Options ]The minority question doesn't work anymore. It's practically 50/50. The deciding factor for us was, its ds penis and ds can make the decision when he's old enough.
[ Reply | Options ]Bull! They're still in the minority and to make your son decide later in life is just idiotic. Your DH should've manned up, gotten it done and over with. DS can then spend time grappling with which college to attend or some other major life decision.
[ Reply | Options ]np and what is wrong with a man deciding about his own penis? How is that idiotic? I find it strange that so many parents don't consider letting the owner decide.
[ Reply | Options ]Look, how many men would let a knife get anywhere near their cocks later in life? So all this talk about letting DS decide later in life is so lame. If DH wants it to be circumcised or not just decide and stop the hand wringing. No need to bring up a tribe in Africa; that just sounds racist and ignorant.
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Ugh, this is such stupid and specious reasoning. Why not make your son feel strong and proud and independent rather than encouraging conformity in all aspects (right from birth!)?
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What I never understand is when we talk about this, people in the US never talk about STDs. Circumcision greatly reduces the chances of getting all sorts of diseases, and consequently reduces the amount the diseases spread. Why is this never mentioned, because to me it is a good reason to circumcise.
[ Reply | Options ]It is absolutely NOT a good reason to circumcise. It's a good reason to educate your kids, male and female, on using prophylactics and safe sex in general.
[ Reply | Options ]yes, but how far does that go? Honestly, I know a ton of men and women who still really only care about pregnancy when thinking about sleeping with someone. When I was dating, it amazed me how few guys wanted to use condoms and even fewer who asked about STD history or got themselves checked. Realistically, I think that people get over their fears of unprotected sex after college (if they ever had them at all).
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i am 23 years old, got cirmcumsicion 3 months ago. I had normal penis my whole life, and a small bruise got me fimosis and had to go througth circumsicion. Having tried both forms, circumsiced is a bit more comfortable during sex. Still i would prefer to have it like before, extra protection and preserves sensibility. Not that i miss it too much tougth, not a revelant change, i suggest leaving it there unless medical circumsicion is needed like in my case
[ Reply | Options ]I always thought I had the trump card in this debate but you win. I'm a circ'ed dad who after research and discussion decided to not circ my sons. #2, because of a issues with his bladder and ureter, had to be circ'ed later on. I'm with you. Unless you have cultural/religious stuff involved, leave the penis be. (And the "oddity in the locker room" argument is stupid. I played organized sports through college. I could not tell you which of my team mates were or were not cut.)
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Well, I am Jewish and DH isn't. DH doesn't want the little guy slashed, but if #2 is a DS I think he will most likely give me more of a say since I would like him to be circumsized. By the way, DH's parents went back and forth and circumsized him at one month. They recommend deciding right away and sticking with your guns. I 100% see both sides (yes or no), but this he can decide stuff is silly to me.
[ Reply | Options ]My husband is British - my OB GYN was Jewish - we live in the US. She told me that my son should match is father. We didnt' do it. My son got a urinary tract infection at 12 weeks and they had to shoot dye up his penis. He wailed like you cannot believe and so did I. I regret it. They say that infection is rare but...I so regret not getting him circumcised.
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