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  • anyone been succesful raising dc in a tv-free home? i really don't want my kids watching tv (or dh and i watching for that matter)... just wondering if i'm being amish here or if its feasible

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    05.23.08, 11:14 AM [ Flag ]
    • Just get rid of the TVs in your home. But I would think it would be impossible to prevent your child from seeing TV at someone else's house.

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      05.23.08, 11:15 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
    • I know lots but not me personally

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      05.23.08, 11:15 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
    • my friend does it. The thing is, live somewhere and send your kids somewhere where this is supported. Otherwise, your kids really will stand out and might feel resentful. The other way to do it is to get rid of cable and just rent dvds of spongebob, or whatever, so they don't feel completely left out of their peer culture

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      05.23.08, 11:16 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
      • no, it's the spongebob and stuff that i'm trying to get rid of. pbs i like, and it's important that we keep a tv to play dvds of things (dh and i are documentary buffs). the rest of it can go

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        05.23.08, 11:17 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
        • i agree...spongebob is awful. We're sending ds to a school where we can hopefully shelter him from this kind of crap. I agree w/post below. My parents sheltered me from pop culture and I was a bit of a freak.

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          05.23.08, 11:21 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
          • but a brilliant freak, right?

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            05.23.08, 11:22 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
            • ^^dcs won't be so sheltered. we still have net access and i'm a net JUNKIE

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              05.23.08, 11:22 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
              • then why do you care - the net is just as bad or worse. You are a hypocrite

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                05.23.08, 11:25 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
                • really? i think that's a really presumptuous thing to say when you have no idea what i'm DOING online (except UB obviously). and no, i don't think it's just as bad or worse, i also think i have more control over the net than a tv that is just fed into our home

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                  05.23.08, 11:27 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
                  • seriously. you cannot compare the crap (and advertisements!) being fed to children on tv w/surfing good informational websites

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                    05.23.08, 11:28 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
                    • ITA, and my kids don't tend to spend HOURS online as i'm sure we could easily spend hours in front of a tv. and there is a mac in our kitchen and they take turns using it. totally diff culture to me

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                      05.23.08, 11:29 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
                      • not different.

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                        05.23.08, 11:39 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
                        • i think it's very different considering most families are sitting on a couch for hours, eating and taking in the net. plus i don't know about your access but ours is completely under our control

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                          05.23.08, 11:42 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
                  • then dont have a tv. it's that simple. I think tv is great and therefore I have one. I don't go to movies bc I think they are a waste of money. You do as you please. It's your house and your kids. They will be no better than mine though

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                    05.23.08, 11:29 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
                • ITD

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                  05.23.08, 11:28 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
          • lol -What kind of school is this? Waldorf? Boarding?

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            05.23.08, 11:31 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
            • NP The CEO of a company that makes up one of the DOW Jones components, who also happens to be one of the first African American CEOs and his three siblings all attended a Waldorf school and he thinks of the education highly. Answer to the quiz anyone?

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              05.23.08, 11:49 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
        • I have to fast forward past Chuckeecheese ads on my PBS station on my DVRd Calliou shows so my son doesn't see them. I am so disappointed in PBS.

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          05.23.08, 11:46 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
          • chuck e. cheese doesn't do 'real' ad spots. it's like 8 seconds of a huge mouse after the show ends. nonetheless, fastforward

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            05.23.08, 11:49 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
        • You can play dvds on a computer, no reason to have a TV

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          05.27.08, 05:49 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
    • My folks did this and I always felt like a bit of an outcast in school. When I got to college I bought my own tv and watched like 10 hours a day for a month.

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      05.23.08, 11:18 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
      • lol, what kind of school did you attend

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        05.23.08, 11:18 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
      • i grew up (mostly) without a tv. i'd watch occasionally @ friend's homes. then my parents got one when i was about 12, and i was obsessed for awhile. now my husband and i only use ours for our netflix rentals. we watch when we're elsewhere (gym, hotel), but we get along just fine without. i don't plan on changing a thing when the baby is born.

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        05.27.08, 06:33 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]
    • I have a 4 yo and 1.5 yo. We don't have cable and we have one tv. It is rarely on and if it is, it is on PBS. Kids watch 1/2 hour when I make dinner, and DH and I watch PBS after kids in bed sometimes. That's it. And everyone seems fine with it in our house.

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      05.23.08, 11:20 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
    • We almost never watch TV, but I have to say that it has been invaluable a few times, particularly when DD was going through a major separation anxiety stage and I had to make an important phone call/talk to the plumber/etc. It's not hard to keep one around for if you want to watch something, and it's also not hard to really limit it. FWIW, everyone I know who grew up without a TV is very weird, totally bitter about it, and they all let their kids watch as much TV as they want.

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      05.23.08, 11:21 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
    • We haven't had a tv for years but I would consider getting one if I felt my kids (oldest 2.5yrs) were missing out. Our eldest does watch cartoons on Youtube.

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      05.23.08, 11:22 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
      • yeah, we're def keeping net access. i just don't want a household of kids who spend 3 and 4 hrs ago in front of a tv (and i know i can gauge that, but honestly we all think we watch less tv than we do. the hrs fly by)...

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        05.23.08, 11:24 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
        • We watch the news etc on the net and honestly we don't miss the tv at all. If we had one it would be on all the time. Whenever I visit my family there only ever seems to be re runs on anyway.

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          05.23.08, 11:27 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
          • exactly, we do not want a household where tv is just on alll the time. and i know myself and it's a great excuse for my lazy parenting.

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            05.23.08, 11:32 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
            • so instead you will constantly stimulate your kids thinking that you are the best parent there is.

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              05.23.08, 11:33 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
              • no, we live in the city for a reason, i pay their tuition for a reason. i don't have to do all the stimulating, but i definitely encourage activities beyond sitting on the couch and taking in cartoon network

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                05.23.08, 11:36 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
    • you are telling your dh not to watch tv - why can't he. He is that much of your unick

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      05.23.08, 11:22 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
      • ya know, some of us are actually married to people who agree with our philosophies. we don't have to force them to do anything...

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        05.23.08, 11:23 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
        • you said you didnt want him watching tv - that's different than saying he doesn't watch tv anyway. You really should move to the amish country

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          05.23.08, 11:25 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
          • dh and i-- i said don't want dh and i watching tv... and we agree that we don't want a household where television is center stage.

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            05.23.08, 11:26 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
            • whatever you say - just stay online - that's really just as unhealthy

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              05.23.08, 11:27 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
              • itd, kids don't eat meals in front of a mac, etc. net access is not center stage, where tv is for most families

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                05.23.08, 11:31 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
                • who cares if they eat and watch tv they don't when they go to restaurants. I eat in front of my computer all the time

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                  05.23.08, 11:33 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
                  • i care in terms of raising couch potatoes.

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                    05.23.08, 11:34 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
                    • tv doesn't create couch potatoes. Parents do. There are many many hours in the day

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                      05.23.08, 11:35 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
                      • but tv makes it easier for (parents like me) to raise couch potatoes. i don't want to use tv to babysit dcs. thats the point

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                        05.23.08, 11:36 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
                      • parents don't really have much control once the tv is turned on. kids just zone out. i have seen this firsthand many times. it's like some sort of traktor beam.

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                        05.27.08, 06:38 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]
    • ds was tv free until he was a few months over 2. since then he watches on some days.

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      05.23.08, 11:25 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
    • My dc don't watch tv except once in a while (less than 1x a month), I'd say. This is not a rule in our house, but we just don't watch a lot of tv ourselves and I honestly never thought to turn it on for dc at the beginning. They are 4 and 2 now and don't seem to miss it. I also think the older one thinks more independently than her peers (the other girls were all princesses for Halloween for instance) and both are very good at amusing themselves so I see clear benefits. But I don't intend to be a hardliner about this. When they start asking for it or feeling left out among their friends, I will let them watch in moderation. They honestly just have not asked for it nor have they seemed to miss it. At this point, I think it would be more of a break for me than anything beneficial for them.

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      05.23.08, 11:37 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
      • see you think your children are better than others

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        05.23.08, 11:40 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
        • where did you get THAT? (np)

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          05.23.08, 11:41 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
          • People who cry sanctiparent over this sort of thing generally feel guilty themselves and are trying to justify parking their own loinfruit before the tube :-)

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            05.23.08, 11:43 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
        • Um, you said that not me. I said she was a more independent thinker and they were good at amusing themselves. I do attribute some of this to no tv watching. However, every child has strengths and weaknesses and I imagine your dc are better at some things than mine. Not sure why you're looking for a fight.

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          05.23.08, 11:42 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
          • ITA, i took in a lot of tv as a kid and my friends who didn't were exxxtremely creative. i really envied them.

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            05.23.08, 11:43 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
        • wow, inferiority complex! i keep seeing this comment posted. but just maybe kids raised without tv will be better. wouldn't that be refreshing: kids who enjoy learning and aren't obese and are imaginative and creative and who grow up to make a difference rather than buying into the whole consumerist *bs* that they learned on tv

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          05.27.08, 06:42 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]
      • ita - this is how I was raised & this is why I want to raise my child the same way--yeah, sure I went through a stage in college where I watched every episdode of the partridge family, but I think I did think a lot more independently than my peers.

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        05.23.08, 02:00 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]
    • We've been successful so far at 4 years 2 months. Here are some helpful websites...http://www.commercialfreechildhood.org, http://www.annenbergpublicpolicycenter.org/, http://www.cmch.tv/, http://www.commonsensemedia.org/ it's difficult, especially in Manhattan where you have to be in the closet about it or risk rude comments. I recently went to a conference about the effects of media on children and it was very helpful to me. There are valid reasons for sheltering kids from media to varying degrees. My 4 yo takes 2.5 hour car rides with us regularly, a several hour plane trip with just one or two books and doesn't bother anyone (was more polite than most of the adults around him). I truly feel we can unwittingly train young children to require large amounts of external stimulation to function. There's a qualitative difference in the original creativity in fantasy roleplaying and roleplaying which children self inflict scripts. I by the way was raised on TV. Watch for the snotty comments even now :-)

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      05.23.08, 11:41 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
      • ty!

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        05.23.08, 11:42 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
      • op: i'm more concerned about the culture of consumption and laziness than the actual sheltering dcs from content thing. i just watched too much tv as a child. it kept me from developing other habits. i'm no dumber for it, i have a phd, i'm a prof, etc, but i am also veerrry lazy, don't spend enough time outside, etc

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        05.23.08, 11:45 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
        • OR Then you should check out the websites I mentioned. DH and I started about 10 years ago when our TV broke and we didn't have time to replace it for 2 years. We discovered our lives really were more interesting without it. We hope to be very aware and guide our child into being an aware and informed consumer. At the age of 2, several weeks after a single brief visit to Target (about 15 minutes) - he pointed to the dashboard of our brand new car's GPS pointing and shouting "Target, Target" as he pointed to the minuscule bullseye on our GPS screen. We'd never explained what Target was or it's logo. It was surprising to say the least.

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          05.23.08, 11:57 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
          • My thought would be that child is too sheltered. Shouldn't you be exposing them the all sorts of media so that they know how to process and handle. How are they going to do in the real world??

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            05.24.08, 10:43 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
    • I love how defensive tv watchers are about their beloved televisions! They get sooooooo angry when someone--quite sweetly, it seems--suggests they don't want to watch tv. Why?

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      05.23.08, 01:26 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]
    • I was raised without a TV..am glad in some ways, felt like outcast in others. Here's what we do: One TV in our bedroom. We watch news, pbs, etc. Having it in bedroom only keeps me from watching crap. I'm focusing on my behavior. Child is allowed to watch tv, we just keep it off most of the time & don't make a big deal about it. Read Dora the explorer books and TV based dolls, etc, so DD knows the storylines. It's not seeing the shows that is a problem, it is not knowing the character's stories, so don't deny child that. When I was growing up, I thought kids that watched TV a lot were pretty boring, though I did want to watch some. Treat it like the movies. A lot of fun, you don't do it all the time.

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      05.23.08, 01:56 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]
    • Your kids will be freaks. There is no advantage. I watched tons of tv as a kid and am a very successful attorney, play sports, run marathons, have loving dh & baby. Really think anything to the extreme (i.e. zero tv) is bad and will make kids go to extrememes.

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      05.24.08, 10:44 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
    • Don't have one. Never have. Not a problem.

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      05.27.08, 05:36 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
    • eh, this doesn't sound like a good idea. not saying you should try to raise little couch potatoes but you are making tv the forbidden fruit and that will come back to bite you. why not watch in moderation? limit to 30 minutes a day?

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      05.27.08, 05:47 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
      • it doesn't have to be made into a "forbidden fruit." it is just something that we don't have and don't need. other people have it, which is fine for them. kids are allowed to watch it if they're visiting someone. it's not like i gasp and shield their eyes if we pass one.

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        05.27.08, 06:47 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]
    • We don't have one. We do watch dvds occasionally, but TV is not a part of our lives. Of course she sometimes sees it at friends' houses.

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      05.27.08, 05:48 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
    • We canceled cable over a year and a half ago and have no antenna, which means no TV in our house. We have 1 television for watching DVDs of our choosing. We made the choice to limit the exposure to advertising, violence and crap for our 2 y/o. We thought we might miss it, but we don't. Seriously. Every now and then we check in with each other, and neither one of us misses it even a little bit. We keep current on news via the internet and occasional newspapers/magazines. I used to have the TV on all the time while I did stuff around the house. Now, I savor the silence and the un-distracted time I can spend with my child. When we go somewhere (e.g., doctor's office or airport) with a TV on in the background, the constant sound actually bothers me. We hope that no TV for our family equals more family time of higher quality. We have 2 large bookshelves stacked with games, puzzles, crafts and books that we turn to instead, and we love it. As 2 y/o gets older, we want to have a family movie night once a week that makes movie-viewing into a special, family event. We have no plans to ever re-introduce the TV, and it's working great for us. I encourage you to go for it!

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      05.27.08, 10:58 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
    • Can't believe the number of people saying kids with no TV are "freaks"!!! I grew up without TV (NOT Amish), and don't think I was ever considered a "freak" because of it. Now, I'm totally thankful that my parents made that choice. I love to read, be outside, play games, do puzzles, craft, etc, and don't miss TV in my life as an adult. Not judging the people who have and watch TV - - it's their choice - - just sayin' I'm glad to have had a TV-free life (for the most part) and don't feel like a "freak" because of it's absence.

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      05.27.08, 11:04 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
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