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dh is overseas and i came across a message he wrote to a friend that he's homesick and yet doesn't want to come home.... does this mean doesn't want to come home to me??? he's been gone like 5 mos
23 replies [ Reply | Watch | Options ]I'm an expat and my guess is that there's a 90% chance it's not you. Being an expat has a million unexpected perks -- feeling like you're something special, feeling like you're part of the global experience, living an interesting life, etc. ... it can be hard to give that up.
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We've been overseas for 10 years, by choice, and are only just now looking at moving back. Granted, our nuclear family is together, but I just wanted to point out that there are many subtle benefits of being an expat that could lead to a person saying they're nervous about going back/don't want to go back, etc., that don't have to do with the spouse at home. They offer repatriation counseling for a reason (and you should see if your DH's company will provide it). GL.
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ooo i might look into this counseling.. do you think 6mos would necessitate it??
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i wish the counseling could START in bogota and transition to counseling at home... like in phases...
[ Reply | Options ]Unfortunately, for repatriation training, it's usually just a 1-2 hour session. Once. But you could read up on it a little and then talk to him about what his concerns/fears/difficulties readjusting are. I think one of the biggest issues is that as an expat, you (often) feel like you're living an exciting, adventurous, different life, and then to return to the same-old, same-old, where you're just the same as everyone else, can be very hard. So maybe just keeping some of that in mind can help you help him re-adjust.
[ Reply | Options ]YEAH he's definitely going to return to the same old same old. no waterfalls and tropical rainforests that i know of in chicago... and i think the language change might be sort of affecting him. the other day i was sending him new music to listen to and he almost getting irritated that i was sending him english music when he wanted to practice his spanish....? wtf? he just seems like a hermit. maybe the trauma surgery in colombia is getting to him????
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