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  • Anyone else in a similiar situation? I am a sahm with 3dcs, my sister is married, big career, no dcs. I feel like the brunt of the responsibility of my recently widowed mom falls on me. I hate it and I am starting to feel resentful.

    11 replies [ Reply | Watch | Options ]
    05.08.08, 10:31 AM [ Flag ]

    • I'm not is a similar situation but many people are. Get her to pay for respite care for you

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      05.08.08, 10:32 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]

      • op-Oh, it isn't that dramatic. Now I am going to sound like a bitch. It is just that my mother is very difficult to be around, and I feel like I do the lions share of the visiting, holidays, etc. For example, this weekend my sister is flying to Asia, and of course, i am left with the Mother's day gig, even though I am a mother and I'd love a day to just think about me. Stuff like that.

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        05.08.08, 10:34 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]

        • yes, that is bitchy. recognize it as such and do your best to be a good dd on mother's day.

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          05.08.08, 10:37 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]

          • Well she lives 2.5 hrs away. I am not going there and I am not in the mood to have her here. So, there it is. I just visited her with my 3 dcs 2 wks ago.

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            05.08.08, 10:49 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]

    • what responsibilities do you have for your mom?

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      05.08.08, 10:33 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]

    • similar situation with my dad- but it's been over 10 years, and honestly, every few years it seems like the responsibility tends to drift to a different sibling.

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      05.08.08, 10:34 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]

    • not quite the same situation, but widowed mom can be a challenge. u need to set clear boundaries w/mom particularly w/the kids. ask sister to take mom to events/dinners/etc she needs to get out and be w/adults. i could go on and on.\\

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      05.08.08, 10:35 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]

      • op- Yes. It has been 2 yrs since dad died and it seems to be getting worse instead of better.

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        05.08.08, 10:36 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]

        • 15 years. initially i was worried about hurting her feelings. you have to cut her off at times. it's hard, but her neediness can be smothering for you and eventually your dcs

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          05.08.08, 10:47 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]

          • Thank you for understanding. It does feel smothering and also complicated by the fact that she is very difficult to be around, and she lives far away so all visits are overnight.

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            05.08.08, 10:49 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
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