On TechRepublic: The top 10 Vista sidebar gadgets
Sign up | Log in
new post » see more posts »
  • 4 yo dd shows a lot of love towards 1 yo ds but at the same time, has some anger in there which i can see because she plays games that involve pushing him or knocking him over etc. and she's starting doing rude things like that to other (generally young younger) kids at the playground (not her friends though). tonight ds pinched her (he was playing) and it hurt her and she cried and said "i don't like him. every time he comes into my room i want him to go away!" now i feel awful because i think that is really the way she feels...her room is where we all play (he has a tiny nook of a room) and she seems to want to play by herself & have him leave her alone a lot. what do i do?

    7 replies [ Reply | Watch | Options ]
    04.18.08, 05:27 PM [ Flag ]
    • gee... perhaps give her some alone time? some time just with you?

      [ Reply | Options ]
      04.18.08, 05:28 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]
    • acknowledge her feelings. tell her "i think you love your brother, but i think sometimes you don't like having him around because it's hard to share". let her have time alone in her room. let her know that her feelings are not 'bad', and that you still love her. then do what you can to make situations where the 2 of them can have fun together.

      [ Reply | Options ]
      04.18.08, 05:28 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]
      • that's pretty much what i said to her tonight. i told her " i understand it's hard to have him around all the time and getting into all of your stuff. i'll try to make more time for you to play in your room by yourself and have your privacy". then few minutes later, ds made a loud fart and dd started laughing and said "i love him even when i'm mad at him".

        [ Reply | Options ]
        04.18.08, 05:30 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]
        • aw. cute. you have the right attitude. i think the only thing that would be 'bad' is if you scolded or punished her for voicing her feelings. all sounds very normal to me.

          [ Reply | Options ]
          04.18.08, 05:31 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]
    • Normal for her to have those feelings. Have you read Sibbling Without Rivalry? Very helpful about this stuff. allow to have those feelings and be able to voice them.

      [ Reply | Options ]
      04.18.08, 05:29 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]
      • i'm actually kind of relieved that she said it. i was wondering where her behavior was coming from (not letting other kids play on the playground equipment w/her, etc.).

        [ Reply | Options ]
        04.18.08, 05:31 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]
    • You need to acknowledge and accept those feelings, and also protect her from ds doing things like pinching her and knocking down what she's playing with.

      [ Reply | Options ]
      04.18.08, 05:35 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]
advertisement
advertisement
Click Here

Boards Help

Abbreviations
More Boards Help

Site Feedback Thank you for your feedback about the new site. We are paying close attention to your comments and we will incorporate them as we make improvements to the site. Please continue to report problems and offer feedback on the Site Feedback Board and visit our Site Talk blog for answers to some of your questions and updates on specific issues.