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05.03.15, 03:26 AM
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you may not be poor, but you are not rich either. don't flatter yourself.
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05.03.15, 03:27 AM
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I never feel or said that I am rich. And being rich to me is not a flattery.
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05.03.15, 03:28 AM
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What an odd response. She didn't say she was rich.
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05.03.15, 03:30 AM
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Lol
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05.03.15, 03:36 AM
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this happens to me! add the fact that i'm from a 3rd world country. what happens next is that they keep on telling me about their financial needs, that they have a ton of debt, that they can't save more... they even asked me for a loan.
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05.03.15, 03:29 AM
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My relatives ask me for loans. My friends try to tell me things like "i bought every color of this Rachel Riley sweater for my dd" or "Let's use my phone to make a reservation at Daniel's because they can recognize my number and will definitely pick up and give us a table" etc.
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05.03.15, 03:33 AM
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No. I have some friends with much less and others with much more. It doesn't really come up. A few times I've caught myself complaining about something that must've seemed gross to certain friends (like construction when they can't afford to buy a house) but I check myself and realize I shouldn't be complaining about that anyway. If I'm my best self and my friends are likewise there's no issue... & no I don't have a ton of friends given that criteria but the ones I have are GREAT
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05.03.15, 03:32 AM
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I completely understand what you are saying. Like you, I am very in tune with other people's feelings and is self aware not to talk about what I have when my friends don't have it. And this is precisely what gets me into trouble. When they slowly start to see that I have more than what I appear to have, they start to get very competitive. And when they finally realize that we are just not on the same level financially, they become resentful.
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05.03.15, 03:36 AM
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Then they are not and were never your friends.
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05.03.15, 03:39 AM
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05.03.15, 03:22 AM
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My kids were juniors and seniors in HS. For real relationships.
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05.03.15, 03:24 AM
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Does that mean they start to become sexually active?
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05.03.15, 03:29 AM
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My older son and daughter both became sexually active senior year in HS. I really don't think before that. My younger son not until college. All three were in. Dry serious relationships.
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05.03.15, 03:32 AM
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Ha! That's what mom thinks
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05.03.15, 03:37 AM
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That's why I said I don't think. But honestly, they were pretty serious athletes and students and were very busy and didn't go out a lot. And in both cases we talked to them about birth control etc. and it just didn't seem like it. But I agree you never know.
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05.03.15, 03:40 AM
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Are these acceptable ages to become sexually active these days? I have teen dcs, starting to think about theses things and want to mentally prepare myself.
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05.03.15, 03:40 AM
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05.03.15, 03:14 AM
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Get some zoloft
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05.03.15, 03:16 AM
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That's strange, since other than the specific age the description probably fits most people on this site.
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05.03.15, 03:17 AM
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How do you have time to be all over the place with so much going on? Maybe you need to be busier, come up with a project, new goal, book a trip so you've something to look forward to?
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05.03.15, 03:17 AM
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I am always super busy. Too busy. I am on maternity leave and vacation right now with my DH asleep
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05.03.15, 03:19 AM
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05.03.15, 03:10 AM
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what did you have done?
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05.03.15, 03:11 AM
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Gastric bypass surgery and a face transplant.
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05.03.15, 03:19 AM
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Nose job, eye job and braces (which surprisingly made me looks very different).
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05.03.15, 03:19 AM
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What does eye job mean when you're a teen? Are you Asian?
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05.03.15, 03:22 AM
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Yes
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05.03.15, 03:23 AM
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That's fairly standard. Your fiance must not be Asian if he cant tell. Are you Korean?
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05.03.15, 03:25 AM
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Yes.
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05.03.15, 03:26 AM
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Np. Korean girls are really pretty. I bet you look fantastic now.
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05.03.15, 03:28 AM
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Thank you. You are so kind.
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05.03.15, 03:28 AM
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This is the equivalent of Jewish girls getting their nose fixed. You're fine.
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05.03.15, 03:29 AM
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Thank you!
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05.03.15, 03:38 AM
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He's never seen any old pics of you? I call bs unless you're a mail order bride.
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05.03.15, 03:14 AM
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I did it when I was 19. I am now 36. I never show people my pics when I was between the age of 13 and 18. I don't even have them anymore.
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05.03.15, 03:18 AM
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yes if he expects to have children with you.
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05.03.15, 03:17 AM
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I do want to have kids. But I really don't want to share this history with him.
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05.03.15, 03:20 AM
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You understand he counts on your genetics, right?
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05.03.15, 03:22 AM
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My brain has not been altered.
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05.03.15, 03:23 AM
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Or. Just posted above re: korean girls. If it ever comes up say something about a reconstructive surgery after an accident.
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05.03.15, 03:30 AM
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Thank you :) Didn't expect to get so much support. So wonderful.
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05.03.15, 03:38 AM
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Np. It doesn't matter what you looked like. Two attractive parents sometimes have ugly kids and two uglies sometimes have cuties. Don't worry about it. Procreate. You get what you get and they can always get plastic surgery too if they need it
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05.03.15, 03:24 AM
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Thank you. This is very encouraging.
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05.03.15, 03:27 AM
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we're all so different at different stages of our lives, I wouldn't worry about it. congratulations!
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05.03.15, 03:18 AM
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Thank you!!!
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05.03.15, 03:20 AM
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no
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05.03.15, 03:32 AM
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It's been 15 years since the eye job. Does it still look good? I heard the fat in eyelids is drooping back after X yrs.
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05.03.15, 03:32 AM
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There are two ways of doing it. One way is minor operation, which droops in a few years. Mine is permanent.
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05.03.15, 03:37 AM
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Yes. Tell him or you may get sued for fraud like that one guy did when his dcs turned out ugly.
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05.03.15, 03:38 AM
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05.03.15, 03:09 AM
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Inbreeding
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05.03.15, 03:12 AM
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this!!! they needed the MC not-inbreed genes, that's why monarchy isn't marrying between each other anymore
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05.03.15, 03:33 AM
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He had a couple of good years now bald and hook nosed. Went downhill fast.
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05.03.15, 03:13 AM
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Harry definitely won the genetic lottery in the long run.
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05.03.15, 03:15 AM
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prince charles is not harry's father.
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05.03.15, 03:18 AM
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He most definitely is. He looks more like him each year, especially in the eyes.
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05.03.15, 03:20 AM
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this! the white part of the eyes, very similar...
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05.03.15, 03:34 AM
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who else was fucking lady di?
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05.03.15, 03:21 AM
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everybody and their dog after Camilla reappeared
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05.03.15, 03:34 AM
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how could you guys not know this? you must be younger than i am.
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05.03.15, 03:41 AM
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EXACTLY!!! but a handsome red-hair guy. you can tell this miles away.
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05.03.15, 03:34 AM
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Remember how handsome he was ten years ago?
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05.03.15, 03:18 AM
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I still think he's cute.
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05.03.15, 03:22 AM
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Cute but not that handsome.
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05.03.15, 03:34 AM
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he looks like a dork
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05.03.15, 03:35 AM
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I think dorks are cute.
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05.03.15, 03:41 AM
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was just thinking this this AM.. aging sucks.
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05.03.15, 03:28 AM
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i know!!! if a wife were aging at his speed, the husband would be considering divorcing. Kate is in a different position though.
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05.03.15, 03:32 AM
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NY Schools
05.03.15, 03:09 AM
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sky for smoke signals
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05.03.15, 03:22 AM
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Will be in another hemisphere at the time, will not see a signal :)
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05.03.15, 03:31 AM
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No idea and it's stressing me out.
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05.03.15, 03:22 AM
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don't stress out.
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05.03.15, 03:23 AM
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Thanks. It was an overstatement. But there seems to be no plan.
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05.03.15, 03:25 AM
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even if you get two 4s in 4th grade, no guarantee you'd get first choice (happened to us) this year.
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05.03.15, 03:28 AM
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I just want to know how the test scores will be given to us. I know where my kid will be in school.
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05.03.15, 03:32 AM
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We r in 5th grade in a citywide, hoping for Hunter for 7th
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05.03.15, 03:33 AM
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snail mail in August.
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05.03.15, 03:26 AM
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No one is doing anything in August at the doe.
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05.03.15, 03:32 AM
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But they said we would get it snail mail last year and we didn't. We only got it through Aris.
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05.03.15, 03:33 AM
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Old school,'first week back they will hand out letters
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05.03.15, 03:31 AM
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05.03.15, 03:08 AM
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Sorry for that poorly written post...
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05.03.15, 03:08 AM
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Ain't nobody's business.
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05.03.15, 03:10 AM
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true but people seem to make it their business. "Why are you still renting" etc
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05.03.15, 03:12 AM
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You are mistaking these people for your friends
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05.03.15, 03:28 AM
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in NYC it's much better at current prices, renting is a no-brainer
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05.03.15, 03:36 AM
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I don't know... I try not to talk about money- what I earn, what I spend it on- but that can get awkward.
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05.03.15, 03:12 AM
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My good friends know we don't have their kind of money. It's obvious from our jobs and home.
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05.03.15, 03:14 AM
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Why hide it they are your friends? They prob know and don't care
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05.03.15, 03:28 AM
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05.03.15, 02:52 AM
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First grade. Four dollars a week. Two in wallet, one in save bank, one in donate bank. (Read The Opposite of Spoiled). I don't buy candy for movies, snack when out if we are going home and it could wait, and anything else I can think of. When we go a trip they take money from save bank to buy souvenirs. For big purchases like an iPod (third grader) I'll pay half.
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05.03.15, 03:06 AM
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Thanks for this!
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05.03.15, 03:27 AM
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05.03.15, 02:41 AM
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I feel overwhelmed with my life and tired all the time. WOH mom with 2 toddlers
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05.03.15, 02:44 AM
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Me too. Can you afford a little household help? How's your diet? Can you fit in any exercise, even just walking to work? Are you opposed to a little screen time?
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05.03.15, 02:47 AM
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^^OP
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05.03.15, 02:48 AM
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I have great help during the week. My diet is ok. I don't exercise and probably don't drink enough water. Screen time fine with me
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05.03.15, 02:49 AM
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Trust me, it gets easier. My kids are 5 and 7. Last year was a turning point for them. Of COURSE you're tired, especially on the weekends. Sundays still kill me. DH isn't tons of help. So at least know you're not alone!
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05.03.15, 02:52 AM
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Thanks!
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05.03.15, 02:55 AM
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My husband just left. I feel so lost.
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05.03.15, 02:45 AM
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Op: I'm sorry. :(
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05.03.15, 02:48 AM
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Op: what led up to this? Do you have a support system nearby? Ok with money? How old are the kids?
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05.03.15, 02:48 AM
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He says he is not in love. I have several good friends who are angels. DCs are 9 and 11.
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05.03.15, 02:58 AM
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^^no real money issues
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05.03.15, 02:59 AM
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I'm so sorry. Guys that say that are usually cheaters. :( be strong for your kids, get some help, be with people you love. Was this out of the blue?
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05.03.15, 03:01 AM
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For me, yes. DH says he has been unhappy for years.
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05.03.15, 03:03 AM
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He sounds deeply troubled. Did he specify what made him "unhappy?"
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05.03.15, 03:07 AM
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I get in cycles of depression where I have dreams about my childhood and really miss my dad, who died a few years ago. I imagine the good times when we were all young
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05.03.15, 02:46 AM
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Op: I'm close to my dad too. I can old imagine the pain you must be going through. Would some sessions with a grief counselor help? A few years since his death is still pretty recent.
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05.03.15, 02:49 AM
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I have gone to therapy which was helpful. This comes and goes.
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05.03.15, 02:50 AM
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Op: your father must have been extremely special. I'm sorry for your loss.use those times to remember/feel close to him.
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05.03.15, 02:53 AM
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Thank you
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05.03.15, 02:56 AM
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I'm pregnant and terrified for my first ultrasound.
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05.03.15, 02:48 AM
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Not op but what are you worried about?
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05.03.15, 02:50 AM
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worried that i'll get bad news.
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05.03.15, 02:53 AM
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Op: odds are things will go ok. But none of this is up to you now. Good luck :)
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05.03.15, 02:54 AM
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Op: congratulations! One thing that was comforting to me was realizing that this fetus really just belonged to God, and his/her fate was up to God...if you're not religious you can have a similar sentiment...it's not really "yours" until it's born...also, more often than not things work out fine. :)
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05.03.15, 02:51 AM
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thanks : )
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05.03.15, 02:53 AM
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Nice way of thinking of it
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05.03.15, 03:00 AM
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I used to work w/families in crisis, loved my job. Then we moved. Somehow I ended up working in a government office, more from a pushing paper side than really in the soup with people. I think I miss my old work...but have less stress now...but this work doesn't feel like "me". I know that makes no sense. But I'm 45; how many more times can I reinvent myself?
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05.03.15, 02:57 AM
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Op: can you stick around a year and look for a different job? Or retire soon and pursue some passions?
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05.03.15, 03:07 AM
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Retire, no way. I've been at this gig two years and feel like I should branch out, find something more interesting, hopefully more $ (although in the helping professions, it's never a lot). But it feels like something inside me has died. No ambition anymore.
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05.03.15, 03:10 AM
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I needed to find a bra and none seem to fit just right.
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05.03.15, 02:58 AM
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Go get fitted. NYC? Upper Breast side or there's a place on around 81st and Broadway?
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05.03.15, 03:01 AM
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DH and I are middle aged and really poor compared to our peers. Bad financial decisions, some things our fault, some not. We don't even own a home anymore. That makes you a loser in flyover btw.
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05.03.15, 02:59 AM
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Yep, me too. start making good decisions NOW so that you have money for your golden years.
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05.03.15, 03:08 AM
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Yee, we are trying and have made some great strides. Still, we are so far behind others..this is disheartening.
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05.03.15, 03:13 AM
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Lol Yes, I mean. I guess it is good to know I am not alone.
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05.03.15, 03:18 AM
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My mom was emotionally and physically abusive while growing up, the older I the angrier I become. She is a good person, but maybe was overwhelmed,but I am now overwhelmed as a mother and can't imagine acting that way(kicking,slapping and telling me she would throw me in the trash/orphanage, my uncle her brother once hit me so hard I went to ER and she made me lie and say I fell from a tree)
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05.03.15, 03:10 AM
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^tired of being angry but I can't forget
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05.03.15, 03:11 AM
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I am sorry. That stinks. She must not have been well put together. I wonder why. Therapy?
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05.03.15, 03:14 AM
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Definitely get some counseling to work this through. An outside source can help you see it from an objective angle and steer your own thoughts in a more positive direction. I'm sorry you had to go through that. It has probably made you a better parent
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05.03.15, 03:14 AM
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Everything is good on paper but I second guess every aspect of my life and wonder if I should be doing something different
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05.03.15, 03:15 AM
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i hate my job...but feel trapped there.
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05.03.15, 03:23 AM
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Why?
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05.03.15, 03:27 AM
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horrible boss. uninteresting work. long days. miss too much of my DD's events. but they pay me...that's about the only good thing.
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05.03.15, 03:35 AM
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I think I'll never have another baby and it's heartbreaking. I need to get excited about going back to work and just accepting life as it is not as I'd like it to be
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05.03.15, 03:32 AM
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Yeah. I'm just sick of being sick and always think I'll get better and be normal but maybe I just have to accept that this is my normal. I give my dd way too much screen time when I'm sick and I'm feeling bad about it. I'm always thinking it's short term and I'll do what I have to to get through the day and tomorrow will be better but she's almost 3 and I've been sick her whole life. Autoimmune disease.
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05.03.15, 03:35 AM
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05.03.15, 02:19 AM
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Maria pitillo
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05.03.15, 02:31 AM
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Kidding. Knew her. She was in Godzilla.
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05.03.15, 02:38 AM
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Marcia gay harden, Steve buschemi, Ed norton, mark ruffollo, Charlotte rampling
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05.03.15, 02:40 AM
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underrated?
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05.03.15, 02:42 AM
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Just not big and splashy like some of these big screen no talents
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05.03.15, 02:48 AM
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J K Simmons
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05.03.15, 03:16 AM
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He's great. He was nominated for an Oscar this year right?
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05.03.15, 03:20 AM
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Thelma Ritter--watch Pick Up on South Street https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w-ZuV8hg-Jg
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05.03.15, 03:27 AM
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