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[ - ] Would you fade a friend who tells you about parties that she and her dh throw that you aren't invited to? I thought we were pretty good friends and that I was liked by them. I have no idea why she'd mention these parties and what does on at them to me. 9 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 04:49 AM Flag
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^^She's also brought up (eg) that she needs to shop to cater a party they're having later in the week that I've not been invited to. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 04:50 AM Flag
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Is she socially awkward? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 05:04 AM Flag
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This would rub me the wrong way and I actually did distance myself from someone who did this to me. She was constantly telling me about dinner parties and brunch parties she'd had that I wasn't invited to, and it wasn't like they just invited a couple of other guests, like she had 12 people over, half of whom I know, and just didn't invite us. She's allowed but why would you go out of your way to tell me about this? That wasn't the only issue I had with her but it was part of a larger problem where I felt like she thought she was doing me a favor by having lunch with me every three months. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 05:26 AM Flag
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I have plenty of friends like this. i dont fade but i see them twice a year [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 05:57 AM Flag
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OP: This is exactly it. When we do catch up it's superficial because she's indicated she's incapable of heavy stuff. I get nothing out of it. I'll just cut it off cold. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 06:44 AM Flag
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You're just one of those people who can't have casual friendships. For you, it's all or nothing. And that's fine, it's who you are, but you shouldn't stay in friendships that aren't going anyplace more serious. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 10:53 AM Flag
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Life is short. Spend time with people who make you happy. Get rid of everything else. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 09:34 AM Flag
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FTW [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 10:02 AM Flag
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that's weird. she probably throws them for a certain group and doesn't see you as part of that group. or she has no social graces. if this bothers you I'd fade on your friendship. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 11:08 AM Flag
[ - ] I miss my guinea pig who died a month or so ago. How lame is that? 13 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 03:45 AM Flag
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Aww, not lame at all. Sorry for your loss. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 03:46 AM Flag
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Thank you. I was just thinking this is the sort of time I would have taken her out to sit with me. Everyone else is asleep. She was great company, for someone who weighed a pound and couldn’t talk! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 03:53 AM Flag
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+1. I am a prospective-cat-lady but don't like cats. Should I get a guinea pig? Pro's and cons please. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 03:53 AM Flag
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Well for one thing, you should get two rather than one. They need company. But yes, I love them. Have you ever had a rodent? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 03:54 AM Flag
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No pets ever. I'm independent and love cute little things. I'm nurturing but won't stifle, I'm a clean freak... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 04:05 AM Flag
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^^Sorry, I have to go to bed. Happy to talk guinea pigs tomorrow! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 04:06 AM Flag
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Yes!! I'm watching this post. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 04:12 AM Flag
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^^Gnite! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 04:13 AM Flag
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Sorry to hear. They are interesting pets. We recently got one and then seeing how social they are ended up with another! They are very chatty and sweet. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 04:08 AM Flag
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Love is love is love [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 04:14 AM Flag
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I am sorry! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 06:16 AM Flag
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I love my guinea pigs too. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 07:23 AM Flag
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guinea pigs are cute. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 11:09 AM Flag
[ - ] I have a terrible headache, I think it’s related to blood pressure. How do you know when such a problem warrants attention? 3 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 03:43 AM Flag
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Eat some tomatoes right away. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 03:45 AM Flag
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What? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 03:56 AM Flag
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do some deep slow belly breathing for 10 minutes and take your bp again. You should have a cuff at home. Take it once a day at the same time and see if you really have an issue. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 05:27 AM Flag
[ - ] I have to go to Boston tomorrow and return on Monday. What’s my best public transport option ? 14 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 02:55 AM Flag
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Amtrak [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 02:57 AM Flag
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Yep. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 03:10 AM Flag
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Plus a million. Acela is the only way. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 03:44 AM Flag
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OP: can I buy tickets at station ? Penn station or grand central ? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 03:46 AM Flag
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Penn Station. You can, yes, or yu can buy online. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 03:47 AM Flag
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Thanks [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 03:51 AM Flag
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Where do you live? Where are you going to in the Boston area? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 03:10 AM Flag
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Mattapan [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 03:25 AM Flag
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Lexington [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 03:45 AM Flag
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Bolt bus if cost is an issue [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 05:43 AM Flag
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And you waited until the night before to figure this out? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 10:15 AM Flag
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Everyone doesn’t have crystal ball like you to predict future. Emergencies happen. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 10:28 AM Flag
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I’m sorry. GL. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 11:13 AM Flag
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+1. Dingbat indeed. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 10:51 AM Flag
[ - ] UB, I have decided to stop complaining about everything and be a better person! 12 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 02:53 AM Flag
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And just like that, you’ve become NOKD. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 02:54 AM Flag
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Lol!! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 03:05 AM Flag
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Great [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 02:55 AM Flag
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How will you resist the urge to complain. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 02:59 AM Flag
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What have you been complaining about? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 03:02 AM Flag
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Right now you're complaining about your prior behavior. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 03:05 AM Flag
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Noooooooooo [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 03:17 AM Flag
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Haha [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 03:22 AM Flag
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Why??? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 03:07 AM Flag
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Good for you! About a year ago I challenged myself to do a month of No Complaining. It was hard and it really made me notice all the times I would start to complain and then have to stop myself. Of course at the end of the month I didn't go back to complaining, I tried to maintain it. So it definitely changed me. I don't know if I'm a better person but my family appreciates it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 03:40 AM Flag
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Excellent. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 03:57 AM Flag
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Complaining is only annoying when it's repeated and you do nothing to change your need to complain. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 04:02 AM Flag
[ - ] Can anyone speak to pelvic floor symptoms/prolapse? I'm freaking out. 28 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 02:51 AM Flag
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Is there no one? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 03:02 AM Flag
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A few years ago I was had stress incontinence and was diagnosed with bladder prolapse. I did physical therapy and it's not an issue anymore. It's more common than you realize...just nobody talks about it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 03:02 AM Flag
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Thank you for responding [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 03:10 AM Flag
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Do you have the problem, or are you a nervous pregnant lady? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 03:03 AM Flag
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Not pregnant. Perimenopause. I have the problem. I'm so uncomfortable. Finally fessed up to DH tonight after being in a horrible depression for a while. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 03:09 AM Flag
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Have you looked into physical therapy? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 03:11 AM Flag
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I had it once. It was very difficult because of abuse history. I felt so much shame, I could not make progress. The therapist said I was dissociated. I would try again. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 03:14 AM Flag
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Sending you hugs. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 03:19 AM Flag
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Thank you. I'm in a dark place and I appreciate it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 03:27 AM Flag
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When I found out I had it, I also got totally freaked out about it. I saw a physical therapist who specializes in women issues. I worked with her for maybe six months...I stuck with it and everything is find now. My gyno was really pleased...she told me that many women don't follow through on the physical therapy and give up after a month or so. Are you in New York? If so, I'd be happy to give you the name of my physical Hang in in there! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 03:14 AM Flag
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sorry for all the typos! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 03:16 AM Flag
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Please don't apologize. Thank you for reaching out. I am in Michigan, but thank you for offering. I know I have to knuckle down and try this again. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 03:18 AM Flag
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There's also a good DVD created by a physical therapist called Hab-it. http://www.hab-it.com It's really good. But honestly, I think it's important to get evaluated in person by a physical therapist who specializes in women's health. I realized that my pelvic floor muscles were not receiving the messages my brain was sending, so I could have done kegels forever and been unsuccessful. The physical therapist was able to assign me very specific excercises to get the neuromuscular connection to work again, and then the kegels and other exercises were effective. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 03:26 AM Flag
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NP. This is really interesting. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 04:02 AM Flag
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NP. Will you please give me a name? I fear I may have it as well have adenomyosis and endometriosis and last couple of months have been very difficult on that front. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 03:25 AM Flag
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I am in New York. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 03:25 AM Flag
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Are you experiencing stress incontinence? Do you leak when when you cough, sneeze, laugh? Or when you try doing jumping jacks? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 03:30 AM Flag
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I worked with a physical therapist named Peggy Brill in midtown, http://www.brillpt.com. She is fantastic. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 03:45 AM Flag
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Sorry you’re going my through this. Perimenopause can cause depression. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 04:01 AM Flag
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I started to be unable to hold my urine, frequent bathroom visits. Thought it was just part of the process of aging. Then found out I had a few fibroids pushing up against the bladder. After removing them, wow, I'm back to normal. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 03:31 AM Flag
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Interesting. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 04:04 AM Flag
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The other post made me google images of prolapse...OMG. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 03:41 AM Flag
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Not helpful [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 03:45 AM Flag
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Op: I'm aware of how bad this is [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 03:45 AM Flag
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What other pos [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 03:55 AM Flag
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Post? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 03:55 AM Flag
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OP, I'm the responder who did physical therapy. I forgot to mention that my gyno gave me a pessary that I would use when going running. It actually works very well at alleviating the prolapse symptoms. It's like using a diaphragm...you don't feel it. After I finished all my physical therapy, I no longer needed the pessary, not even when I go running. Many women use pessaries long term. In addition to alleviating the symptoms, they can help prevent the prolapse from getting worse. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 04:00 AM Flag
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Op: I read about those and I felt terrified :/ I'm glad to hear your experience. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 04:30 AM Flag
[ - ] Any well-traveled people on? I’d love to know where a certain postcard on Postsecret dot com is from. It’s the fourth or fifth card down on the website from May 19 but will only be uo until midnight tonight. The town with the aqueduct, and the message that starts “ I thought studying abriad...”. Thanks. 6 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 02:36 AM Flag
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Those are Roman aqueducts, rooftops look Italian. Somewhere in Italy, have you Google famous aqueducts? That one is pretty amazing. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 02:41 AM Flag
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Thank you! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 02:46 AM Flag
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UB is the best. I knew someone would figure it out. Sorry if I seem ignorant — we’ve only traveled to the most obvious places (Eiffel Tower, etc.) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 02:55 AM Flag
[ - ] Divorcing with three kids and exdh is proposing to take the kids two nights a month and two weeks a year for vacation. He doesn't want any other time. I was a SAHM and he will pay 20K a month for the next six years and then 15K a year for another 4 years. Any divorce lawyers here? What do you think? 19 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 02:35 AM Flag
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Who pays for education? Isn’t this too less? How much does he make? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 02:37 AM Flag
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OP: Family business. They only disclosed 1.9M (not sure if they are being truthful). He pays for all education. All kids in public school and he will pay for public or private university. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 02:40 AM Flag
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Ok [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 02:46 AM Flag
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Only Indians say, "Isn't this too less?" [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 02:53 AM Flag
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How old are the kids? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 02:40 AM Flag
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primary and middle school [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 02:42 AM Flag
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You have it made! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 02:49 AM Flag
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Amount too low, term too short. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 02:52 AM Flag
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OP: I also get the house and with mortgage and taxes, it will cost me 6k a month. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 02:56 AM Flag
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He should pay it off. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 03:23 AM Flag
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Two nights a week or month? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 02:59 AM Flag
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So, $2.16M over 10 years. How much of your mortgage do you have left? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 03:01 AM Flag
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600K [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 03:18 AM Flag
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ITA with the poster above saying he should pay off the house seeing as he only wants them 38 nights a year. $2.16M is only good in this situation in its entirety. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 03:36 AM Flag
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What’s your plan for income in 10 years? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 07:06 AM Flag
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Not enough money. If he only takes them for that limited period of time, he needs to provide the home free and clear of debt, and keep paying monthly through the end of college for the youngest child. The last child will still come home during college. There should also be an agreement to pay for graduate school. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 09:38 AM Flag
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^ Also, hire a forensic accountant to determine the value of the family business. You should ensure that he isn't hiding money. A father who doesn't want to see his kids more than a few days a year should at least provide for them generously. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 09:42 AM Flag
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No way would I accept that. Insist he takes the kids 50% of the time, or you will not be able to make any progress at work, and you will be in poverty in old age. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 10:07 AM Flag
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Agree if he pays off mortgage. Then it is a good deal. What did he do? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 11:19 AM Flag
[ - ] Hosting a BBQ and guests ask, "What can I bring?". Is this just to be polite or do they really want to contribute? When I ask, I genuinely mean it. But now I'm wondering if suggesting something is tacky? 27 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 02:23 AM Flag
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And fwiw, I've told everyone (this time), "No need to bring anything!" [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 02:24 AM Flag
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If you really don't need anything, just say again No need to bring. If people really want to, they'll probably opt for wine. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 02:25 AM Flag
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Where I grew up, it was impolite for guests not to offer to bring something, but far more impolite for a host to accept. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 10:09 AM Flag
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No....most people want to contribute. Something easy to pick up is fine. Sally, it'd be great if you picked up some beer or soda or burger buns or whatever else is easy. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 02:25 AM Flag
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No [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 02:53 AM Flag
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+1 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 03:10 AM Flag
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To be polite. I think we always have too much food when we host and find it cumbersome to add what guests bring. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 02:25 AM Flag
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People will bring something either way so if you don’t want crap laying around tell Them something. Wine, cookies, etc. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 02:29 AM Flag
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Good point! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 02:30 AM Flag
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I sometimes assign people chocolate to serve with the coffee. Or not serve —then we keep it! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 03:07 AM Flag
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I plan the menu to be complete and coherent and wouldn’t serve anything people brought, so I vote for saying “Nothing, thanks,”. A lot of people have confused bringing a hostess gift with bringing something to serve. Just whisk anything they bring away to the kitchen and don’t serve it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 02:34 AM Flag
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Wow, how rude. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 02:52 AM Flag
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Not really. Every party isn’t a pot luck. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 02:53 AM Flag
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This. It’s actually considered rude to bring food. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 03:03 AM Flag
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Nope [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 03:11 AM Flag
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Oh! If someone brings something, I would certainly put it out! -OP [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 04:03 AM Flag
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I never show up empty handed. So I ask if I can bring anything if they say no then I know they have it covered and just do alcohol, sometimes a dessert. If a more formal event maybe flowers. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 02:51 AM Flag
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Is that in addition to a hostess gift, or in lieu of? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 03:42 AM Flag
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I like to call when I’m leaving home to see if they need any ice or other last-minute stuff. Otherwise, just bring a present but assume they have the food all planned. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 02:56 AM Flag
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That’s a bit much. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 03:01 AM Flag
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Which? The call? We entertain a lot, and sometimes it would be helpful (ice, or parsley, or limes). [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 03:04 AM Flag
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To each her own. The last minute checking in would drive me nuts; we shop and prep in advance so it might be different for me. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 03:08 AM Flag
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You’re probably just better organized than I am. I wouldn’t want every guest to call and inquire, but one per party, yes. When I know you better I’ll tell you about the time I sent the first to arrive around the corner to pick up a bottle or cheap red wine for the sausage and peppers. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 03:18 AM Flag
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I have a good friend who does this. And I love be it! (She must know I always need something) :) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 04:04 AM Flag
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Regional. I am in the Midwest now and it is different than in ny (where among umc it is kind of tacky, but among my more working class relatives it is normal) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 03:08 AM Flag
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So in the Midwest do people bring food? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 03:29 AM Flag
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I appreciate it when the host tells me what to bring. I don't like to show up empty handed. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 10:40 AM Flag
[ - ] Binging on Handmaid's Tale, so disturbing but so good! 6 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 02:23 AM Flag
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Yes. How far are you? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 02:47 AM Flag
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S1, Ep8. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 02:49 AM Flag
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I'm with you , just started tonight. Starting episode 3. Just finished the Scrabble episode. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 03:06 AM Flag
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Enjoy! I envy people who are just starting. Such a great show. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 03:15 AM Flag
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Such an impossible show to binge! Good for you- I can barely take 1 episode at a time. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 03:09 AM Flag
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Did you read the book? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.27.18, 10:10 AM Flag
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