• Filter the conversation
[ - ] Do we have any idea yet who will run for mayor of NYC, a Republican? We vote next year, correct? 15 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:21 PM Flag
»
I will NOT vote Democrat next year. I want NYC to stop being a sanctuary for illegals. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:23 PM Flag
»
NYC is getting dirtier by the hour. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:24 PM Flag
»
Yes full of trash, Deblahhzioh is a disgrace [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:25 PM Flag
»
It's doing to end up as a third world country city if Hillary Clinton, DNC and De Blasio have its way. We are spending so much $ on welfare in NYC on illegals as we don't comply with Federal Law requiring legal status verification even when it comes to housing. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:25 PM Flag
»
Well, Trump was right... We spend more on illegals than on our retired Veterans! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:28 PM Flag
»
YEP! I have enough of that bullshit. The Democrats have lost my allegiance, while trying to buy future votes with other people's $. Notice that De Blasio's welfare for illegals is coming from federal money, the law is explicit not allowing it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:32 PM Flag
»
"De Blasio's welfare for illegals is coming from federal money" Not everything, but a big chunk of it (section 8, a big % of medicaid, food stamps...) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:32 PM Flag
»
Can Bloomberg come back???? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:23 PM Flag
»
PLEASE!!! Of frankly: any other who is NOT Democrat! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:25 PM Flag
»
bloomb, giuliani and trump are all sort of democrat. it's just dumbass deblasio is dyed in the wool flaming left. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:31 PM Flag
»
It's the clintons with their NAFTA, the DNC bending towards illegals to buy their future votes. The Democratic party sucks at least as much as the GOP. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:33 PM Flag
»
»
Vomit! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:25 PM Flag
»
Why? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:28 PM Flag
»
Isn't that the year in which the criminals bombed even UN refuges for kids and hospitals? The bastards just want to keep on stealing more Palestinian lands and homes, as they've done from the get go. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:31 PM Flag
[ - ] Another etiquette question - we were invited for a weekend at my old classmate's annual family resort. We settled on a weekend and they have paid our way for the accommodations for 3 days 2 nights. We didn't think anything of it until I looked it up this morning and realized it's a Christian family retreat with fellowship, prayers, bible school for kids etc. I have no idea how we missed this. We are NOT religious at all and this is making me and DH extremely uncomfortable. What do we do now? 29 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:14 PM Flag
»
Remember a previous engagement. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:17 PM Flag
»
DH was thinking we should just be honest about the religion aspect and offer to reimburse them? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:19 PM Flag
»
Agreed! Plus, if it's a family resort they didn't actually pay for the rooms. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:19 PM Flag
»
When is the retreat? If soon enough for them to find a replacement, just tell them that you didn't realize this and you don't feel comfortable, so you'd rather see them at another time. If the retreat is too soon to find a replacement, you reimburse them. Or, you just go. Bible stories and moral lessons can't be all bad :) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:18 PM Flag
»
And couldn't you go for a walk or a drive into town for some of the activities you don't care for? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:20 PM Flag
»
Go anyway and participate in as much or as little as you want. They won't be pushy about it -- it's mostly labeled Christian so they don't have to deal with speedos at the pool party. I say this as the long married atheist wife of a devout Christian. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:19 PM Flag
»
+1 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:21 PM Flag
»
They should have told you. Politely say you have another engagement you can't get out of, but I find it obnoxious they didn't disclose this [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:19 PM Flag
»
ITA, I would have no qualms cancelling. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:20 PM Flag
»
What do you think would happen to you if you spent a weekend at a retreat that isn't your own religion??? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:25 PM Flag
»
Or- that's not the point. They should have disclosed it and he fact they didn't is creepy [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:27 PM Flag
»
Just say it's against your Scientology belief system [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:20 PM Flag
»
Would you have to do all these things? Isn't it possible that they offer these activities but you wouldn't be required to attend? Aside from that, my DH is Jewish and I was raised Protestant but am not religious. If we had to, we would participate in the fellowship, prayers, etc. as an interesting learning experience and because there's no harm in it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:20 PM Flag
»
Didn't you know this friend is religious? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:22 PM Flag
»
I find this hard to believe. That you wouldn't know their level of faith and what this entailed. But if so, just politely say this. I don't think it's wrong to push back at people who may be pushing their belief system on you. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:23 PM Flag
»
Why are these responses so narrow-minded? As an example -- I'm not Mormon, but if a friend invited me to a Mormon retreat I would go because it would be interesting. No one is going to force you to join the religion. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:23 PM Flag
»
I'm not religious. I don't enjoy dogma [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:28 PM Flag
»
Not all religion is "dogma." Bible stories, for example, are just that - stories. You don't have to believe they are real to listen. I also don't see fellowship and prayer as "religious dogma." [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:32 PM Flag
»
But you knew what it was and you made a choice. Big difference. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:28 PM Flag
»
what's the bfd? you just go. have fun. that's it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:24 PM Flag
»
Uh, no [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:25 PM Flag
»
Ewwww [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:26 PM Flag
»
then don't and be an asshole b/c you can't nod and say thank you when people are thankful to god. and i'm agnostic. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:31 PM Flag
»
I agree!!!!!! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:26 PM Flag
»
Yes! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:29 PM Flag
»
This. But these types are terrified of religion. I think they're afraid that something might actually resonate and their whole world built on cynicism will crumble a bit. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:31 PM Flag
»
lmao [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:33 PM Flag
»
No thanks [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:31 PM Flag
»
You and your husband sound like narrow-minded aholes. Your friend is better off without you. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:33 PM Flag
[ - ] For those who don't get why Trump is doing so well: "Many Americans suffered from illegal immigration – its impact on labor markets, financial costs, crime, the sense that the rule of law was collapsing. But the protected did fine – more workers at lower wages. No effect of illegal immigration was likely to hurt them personally." http://www.mauldineconomics.com/frontlinethoughts/life-on-the-edge 7 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:14 PM Flag
»
"It was good for the protected. But the unprotected watched and saw. They realized the protected were not looking out for them, and they inferred that they were not looking out for the country, either. The unprotected came to think they owed the establishment – another word for the protected – nothing, no particular loyalty, no old allegiance." [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:15 PM Flag
»
De Blasio imposed in NYC a "sanctuary status" protecting criminals instead of voters, didn't even occur to him to ASK voters whether they wanted that or not. The degree in which how the establishment took its voters for granted is fascinating, given that already the biggest voting block are Independents, who are OWED by the parties, not the other way around: tone-death establishment. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:17 PM Flag
»
It was good for people like him who profit from cheap labor. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:17 PM Flag
»
OP here, I'm an investor! So go figure, of course I benefited. Still, I vote for Trump because long term, more illegal immigration and free trade deals like Hillary Clinton and Bill De Blasio want is going to do more damage than good to our country. They respond to their desire to have more Democratic voters going forward and to their corporate backers. It's time they switch and start to work for voters instead. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:21 PM Flag
»
What is fascinating about 2016 is that the new reality of the push back of those who had been screwed up by the current system is finally fully reflected in investment letters, including Bill Gross call for Universal Income. The revolution is finally here. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:19 PM Flag
»
So why not punish the employers that hire these people? Trump doesn't seem to go after the billion dollar corporations, restaurants, resorts that hire illegals. What about farming? You do know that our economy depends (right or wrong) on these people working. They actually get fake SS#'s and then work, and have taxes taken out but don't receive the benefits later on. Trump uses illegals to cut his lawn in FL. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:25 PM Flag
»
he's doing well b/c everybody is sick and tired of that loser obama. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:25 PM Flag
[ - ] Does anyone else find it a slap in the face that Obama went on an apology tour to Japan during Memorial Day Weekend?? 16 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:10 PM Flag
»
Yes, he just wanted another free trip before he gets the boot [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:13 PM Flag
»
+ [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:20 PM Flag
»
no [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:15 PM Flag
»
Gross [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:18 PM Flag
»
except he didn't apologize. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:18 PM Flag
»
There is that - and I thought it was just fine. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:20 PM Flag
»
Um yeah, he did. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:22 PM Flag
»
no, he did not. expressing regret at the outcome is not the same as saying you're sorry for your country's actions. and if you think it's the same, you've been accepting a lot of non-apologies in your life. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:25 PM Flag
»
Regret on the outcome? Yeah, NO! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:30 PM Flag
»
He's in Japan? I thought that was last week. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:19 PM Flag
»
The Great Apologist strikes again! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:20 PM Flag
»
Not an "apology tour" and it was fine with me. Reminds people that they might not want Trump to have the power to drop another one. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:21 PM Flag
»
I wouldn't mind dropping another one in the Middle East. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:24 PM Flag
»
He hates America, are you really surprised? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:22 PM Flag
»
Nope. He did what any president would have done. He showed respect and sorrow but did not apologize. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:25 PM Flag
»
It is fine to express regret that we had to drop the bomb, but I think the Japanese Prime Minister should have visited Pearl Harbor first. Until they acknowledge that they started the war, we shouldn't even express regret at having dropped the bomb. Plus, that decision saved Japanese and American lives. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:28 PM Flag
[ - ] My DH acts like a jerk - a lot - and sometimes picks fights with me in front of my family members. Without fail, my father jumps to DH's defense and tells me I'm overreacting or should apologize. I have several siblings, and whenever they have a problem with their spouse (or anyone), my dad jumps to their defense. What is up with this? 13 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:09 PM Flag
»
What the f is wrong with your dad that he goes against the family? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:12 PM Flag
»
Op: I don't know. My DH went away for Memorial Day with a bunch of friends (after traveling for work all week) laving me alone with DCs, so I went to visit my family. DH got home this morning and called me angry about something at the house, and my whole family overheard his phone call blaming me for things. Instead of having my back, my dad told me I was overreacting and should apologize to DH. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:17 PM Flag
»
^^he was angry that I didn't call ups to stop package delivery, and they left boxes sitting outside our door that could have been stolen, our our house could have been robbed because people would know we weren't home. Something so minor and stupid, and I've been taking care of 3 DCs by myself all week (in addition to working full time), and this is how I get treated. I got really defensive, and dad told me to apologize to DH. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:20 PM Flag
»
Well to be fair, DH had good points. I would just say he's right, it was a mistake and I'm glad none of those things actually happened. Because you know they really could occurred. He went over the top too, because in fact they didn't happen. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:33 PM Flag
»
You tell us. Maybe DH pick the fight in front of your family because he thinks if even they disagree with you, you will see that you are the one being unreasonable? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:15 PM Flag
»
Op: no, the rest of my family thinks DH is a jerk. My dad is the only one who takes his side, and I don't understand why. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:18 PM Flag
»
He must see himself in him for some reason. OR your DH makes lots of money and thinks that you are supposed to be greatful or is worried DH will leave you. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:23 PM Flag
»
Are you sure it's not you? Is it possible you're resentful toward dh and are seeing your interactions very differently than everyone else? Can you tell us more details on the conversation this morning? Context, what he said, what you said. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:20 PM Flag
»
I posted more above, and basically, I called him to say hi (with the phone on speaker so everyone could say hi), and the first words out of his mouth were to accuse me of forgetting to stop package delivery and didn't I know that they packages could have been stolen or our house could have been robbed. I got really defensive and responded that I've been home alone all week taking care of everything while he's been off on a golf trip with friends, and he told me I was overreacting and my dad agreed. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:23 PM Flag
»
he's right. you should have stopped package delivery. your bringing up the fact that you've been watching the kids all week was just one-upmanship defensiveness, and not relevant to the package question. i don't think you're overreacting so much as being defensive and off-message. you should have just said, you're right. i'm sorry. with all the child-care responsibiiities for the entire week, it slipped my mind. next time, i'll be better about asking you to help make sure stuff like that gets taken care of. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:31 PM Flag
»
Is this "boys vs. girls" and he's on the side of the boys, or does he always choose sides against the family? Maybe your dad thinks the women in the family are a bunch of ball-busters, and he's defending his SILs. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:20 PM Flag
»
If your dad always defends your siblings but always sides with your DH, who is the actual problem? Think about it. Maybe talk to your siblings to get perspective. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:21 PM Flag
»
your dad jumps to the spouse's defense always or just yours? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:26 PM Flag
[ - ] Happy Memorial Day! Nice Army eye candy for you.... 9 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:06 PM Flag
»
»
Ok. Now show the dead and wounded ones. That's what this holiday is about. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:09 PM Flag
»
Oh come on. We also will salute the ones alive today? Wtf [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:11 PM Flag
»
Np: actually their day is armed forces day. Veterans Day is retired military. Memorial Day is for those that passed and armed forces day is for current. I just did a lesson with DC. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:14 PM Flag
»
I didn't know "the strict rules" for honoring soldiers. My mistake. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:19 PM Flag
»
No. I wasn't a criticism of your post. Sorry. I was just looking to throw that knowledge out there. I just learned it! I like your post. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:30 PM Flag
»
:) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:32 PM Flag
»
My kid just told me this yesterday. I actually didn't ever think about it. I didn't even know there was an armed forces day. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:20 PM Flag
»
Sorry. Just saw a little of that show on thirteen about the soldier suffering from PTSD . I have so many servicemen in my family. I just feel frustrated and I don't know why. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:15 PM Flag
[ - ] Pool party etiquette question. How do you tell a visiting DH to leave his speedo at home, this happens all too often. 20 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:06 PM Flag
»
are they european? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:07 PM Flag
»
No, LA, crossfit obsessed [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:09 PM Flag
»
hmmm that is hard. I don't think you can say anything without being incredibly rude. But I grew up in Europe so speedos don't bother me, nor do 70 yr old topless women. Just bodies in swimsuits, NBD. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:19 PM Flag
»
You don't host if you can't be gracious. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:09 PM Flag
»
Ew [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:10 PM Flag
»
Rude [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:19 PM Flag
»
What bathing costumes are permitted in your house? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:13 PM Flag
»
Vineyard Vines or skinny dipping [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:15 PM Flag
»
OP must also have a rule against bikinis worn by women who are mothers. Fwiw, I don't hang out in bathing suits around friends (no pool parties other than for kids) but if someone wanted to use my pool I'd be fine with angry that covers the private parts. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:19 PM Flag
»
Bikinis and speedos should only be allowed for people with good bodies. No one wants to see beer bellies or cottage cheese thighs [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:22 PM Flag
»
OR. Not sure what your friends look like. I am almost 40, am 5'7 and weigh 115 lbs. I'm in good shape but I'm so pale that I would never parade around in bathing suits. My friends are usually in decent shape but wear shirts and shorts or tunics. As I said, it's usually the children who get into the water. And we are in FL so you would expect a more liberal pool attire. Anyway, I am so pale that no one believes me I live in FL. However, the sun is so dangerous here that I usually stay out of it completely or cover up in hat, long sleeve rash guard and super high SPF. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:32 PM Flag
»
»
Just say, we love all you cats and kittens, but please keep it family friendly: no thongs, no speedos. You know what to do. Look forward to seeing you! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:21 PM Flag
»
Thongs! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:23 PM Flag
»
You take him aside and say, all quiet and conspiratorial, "Steve, would you mind covering uo a bit this year? Some of the ladies find your usual outfit a bit... Distracting." Then he covers up and gets to feel like a stud at the same time. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:22 PM Flag
»
Hot stuff, you really fill out that speedo, let's step inside [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:28 PM Flag
»
I wouldn't say anything ahead of time. Maybe a dig during the speedo sighting (thanks for skipping the thong this time, "as you can see Steve is quite proud of his Brazilian wax"), etc. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:25 PM Flag
»
That's really mean. If you can't be gracious, don't invite him. But really, what's the big deal? It's not your hairy thighs on display. I'd actually love to have this guy around because it would make me feel less self conscious about my own swimsuit body issues. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:29 PM Flag
»
you're awful. that is no way to handle this, and you wouldn't appreciate someone doing this to you (at attempt at public shaming) over something they disagreed with you on. you need better social skills, stat. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:33 PM Flag
»
You can't say a darn thing but feel free to laugh at him. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:30 PM Flag
[ - ] TTC and afraid to travel to our regular summer destinations due to Zika. Is it too late to rent a beach house somewhere decent? any recommendations for families traveling from NYC? 11 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:02 PM Flag
»
Go to the jersey shore [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:03 PM Flag
»
When I think of Jersey Shore, I think crowded drunken mess. Am I wrong? Are there family friendly areas? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:20 PM Flag
»
Yes, you are wrong. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:25 PM Flag
»
If you want rich and boring, go to Spring Lake and Sea Girt. More arty and hipster, go to Asbury Park. For a dry family town, ocean city. Fun and popular family town, LBI. Avalon is very nice but farther down. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:27 PM Flag
»
Wow, you don't get out much. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:27 PM Flag
»
Cape Cod, Berkshires, other N England areas. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:06 PM Flag
»
Far [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:07 PM Flag
»
Far from Zika which is what she asked. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:09 PM Flag
»
No, far for a weekend trip [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:11 PM Flag
»
North Fork, Ct coastline. How far is too far? If you can travel to areas with Zika, why not the Cape, Vt, NH? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:24 PM Flag
»
Just avoid warmer areas [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:29 PM Flag
[ - ] Follow up -- Salvation Army and Goodwill in Westchester do not take camping equipment 11 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 01:58 PM Flag
»
LMAO! Just buy it new on Amazon: CLEAN, new and CHEAP! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:00 PM Flag
»
I want to give it away [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:01 PM Flag
»
I might be interested. What do you have? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:02 PM Flag
»
Tent, sleeping bags, outdoor shade thing (think small room with no walls) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:06 PM Flag
»
Are you in Westchester? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:06 PM Flag
»
We heard you the first time. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:01 PM Flag
»
Oh, for God's sake. There are people here in the nyc area who would like it. Set up a neutral place to meet and get rid of it, for ef's sake. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:05 PM Flag
»
two or three people here have expressed an interest in taking it. Op is silly. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:09 PM Flag
»
No one has suggested actually contacting me or even saying if they will meet in lower westchester [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:21 PM Flag
»
Call a camping/hiking organization. I leave that stuff on our street with a sign - Free Whatever. And it usually goes. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:07 PM Flag
»
Pist on your local FreeCycle site -- there are NYC and Brooklyn sites on Yahoo groups. You post an "offer" ad with a description, and someone who wants the stuff will reply. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:23 PM Flag
[ - ] Follow up -- Salvation Army and Goodwill in Westchester do not take camping equipment 1 Reply [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 01:58 PM Flag
»
Thanks, good to know. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:00 PM Flag
[ - ] Please explain to me why some women would choose to become single moms with no help from a partner? Just heard through work grapevine that another co worker, 39 yr old unmarried and obese Caribbean woman gave birth to her 1st child, a boy. She told me she went to a sperm bank. I dont get why she would choose to be a single mom and has no idea how much work is really is. 55 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 01:46 PM Flag
»
You sound horrible. Think really hard and I bet you will come up with a few reasons a woman without a partner would be a mom. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 01:50 PM Flag
»
+1 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 01:52 PM Flag
»
+2 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 01:55 PM Flag
»
OP: its unfair to the kid [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:03 PM Flag
»
Who the hell are you? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:05 PM Flag
»
It's God, of course. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:06 PM Flag
»
Life is not perfect. I raised son on my own. He's very successful, in every aspect of his life. Lots of family support helped. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:08 PM Flag
»
This. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 01:51 PM Flag
»
Not everybody puts what's best for the kids first. Sad, but true. Also, if her own childhood wasn't under a traditional family, she might value the benefits that brings the kids less. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 01:51 PM Flag
»
The world is fully populated by under educated, tatoo wearing morons. Get down off your high horse and take a look around yourself. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:07 PM Flag
»
There is a reason why these women cannot find a mate...dumb, unwilling to make positive changes like losing weight, living in denial. It's the same reason why they go into single motherhood by choice. Of course this doesn't apply to wealthy celebs who are in a great financial situation to hire all the help they need. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 01:51 PM Flag
»
OBESE!!! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 01:55 PM Flag
»
Why do you assume this woman is "dumb"? She may also have lots of extended family support. Life is not perfect. Lots of women raise wonderful kids on their own. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:05 PM Flag
»
If she was smart she would have either found her ideal mate or been smart enough to know when to settle to ensure she could become a mother. Ther is a total fallacy that women should hold out for that one special guy, freeze their eggs, take their time....guess what, if you want to be coupled up, you will be. Most women I know who are still single into their forties would have been able to find husbands or at least a partner if they worked out thief underlying issues through therapy. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:25 PM Flag
»
You must be a troll. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:07 PM Flag
»
No, just honest. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:25 PM Flag
»
Well, I'm a single mother who is a size 2 and former petite model with an advanced degree and financially. A relationship didn't work out as I neared my 40s. Sure I could have raced against time and had an oops baby with someone I didn't love but I chose the best path for my situation. Oh- and by the way- I'm dating and men have always liked me and found me attractive. Thankfully most people in real life aren't as close minded as you. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:25 PM Flag
»
Financially stable. Sorry for typo [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:27 PM Flag
»
You are the exception and not the norm..lets see what your kid says when he/she grows up. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:27 PM Flag
»
It sounds like you have it together, so you are the exception. We are talking about women who were never able to lock down what they wanted because of their blindness to their own issues. As for the comment about what your kid will think- I think they will be impressed with what you've accomplished. Being financially independent and stable is key. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:31 PM Flag
»
I don't think so- I know quite a few other moms who made this choice or are considering it (I live in NYC so no surprise given the disparity in gender population). I can't think of one who isn't attractive and kind although some aren't what I'd call financially super stable (think around 100-150k which isnt so much for the city but doable) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:31 PM Flag
»
Many women want kids it is as simple as that. At least when you get sperm from a sperm bank you can select traits u want [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 01:52 PM Flag
»
Um, hello... Remember the lawsuit in the news recently against a sperm bank that did not verify the donors info and a schzio with a prison record has fathered like over 50 kids. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 01:58 PM Flag
»
This. You're better off finding an attractive, intelligent gay man and having sex with him. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:02 PM Flag
»
turkey baster! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:08 PM Flag
»
Think back to college biology or anthropology. It isn't hard to figure this out. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 01:52 PM Flag
»
Isn't it obvious? She wanted to be a mother, but she's 39 and unmarried with no immediate prospects for a partner so it's now or never. I would suspect that if you asked her, she would agree that being a single mom is not optimal, but sometimes we have to choose between less-than-ideal circumstances. To her, being a single mom was not as bad as missing out on having kids altogether. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 01:53 PM Flag
»
The kids will miss out on having a father or are dads just expendable except for providing $$ ? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 01:57 PM Flag
»
Yes, they will miss out on having a father. Again, though, she is dealing with a range of choices--none of which are ideal. Be childless on the one hand; or raise a child alone (and all that goes with that for her and her child) on the other. She made her decision. You can disagree, but she's not alone. Lots of women on this board are married but their DH's aren't engaged in parenting (or they are divorced and the dad isn't involved). It's not ideal, but we don't live in an ideal world. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:02 PM Flag
»
np This question sounds like you are just going around looking to be offended. Grow up. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:03 PM Flag
»
Judgy much? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 01:54 PM Flag
»
+1 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:00 PM Flag
»
Here is one: You are a 39 yr old obese, black, employed, woman and you have about 12 months to fall in love and conceive if you want to be a mother. It is unlikely that you will find a compatible, employed man in the next 12 months that wants to marry a 39 year old, obese woman and care for a child. Hypothetically. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 01:54 PM Flag
»
OP: she is obese and black but she sny ugly and dresses fashionably (we are both mid management). [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:11 PM Flag
»
I would like to hear from the children of these mothers. How is it growing up without a father and possibly untold number of half siblings. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 01:54 PM Flag
»
I saw a talk show that interviewed the moms and kids. Overwhelming ly the girls said they would not do what their moms did. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:07 PM Flag
»
You & 5k poster below must be the same troll or its asshat day on UB [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 01:54 PM Flag
»
OP: uhh no. I havent been on UB this weekend or last week. Rain caused cancellation of our morning plans and just talked to another coworker who shared the news. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:16 PM Flag
»
Welfare. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 01:59 PM Flag
»
I thought she was employed. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:04 PM Flag
»
TROLL can't keep her FAKE story right. This poster is a racist troll. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:06 PM Flag
»
Plot twist! OP is also on welfare. They are welfare colleagues! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:07 PM Flag
»
OP: shes my coworker so obv shes employed! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:09 PM Flag
»
Were she a white woman would you be posting this? And why does her being obese have anything to do with this? Most people have no idea how much work it is. You sound quite dim - and a bit unkind. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:02 PM Flag
»
Agreed. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:03 PM Flag
»
+1 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:07 PM Flag
»
OP: race has nothing to do w it..the 1st coworker was white and I mentioned that in another UB thread a few weeks ago. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:08 PM Flag
»
Well, I used to teach in an urban area. Many mothers had 3-6 kids, each with a different father. Figure that one out! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:02 PM Flag
»
Why does something need to be explained to you? It's none of your business. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:09 PM Flag
»
Where do you work? the DMV? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:10 PM Flag
»
No McDonalds. But I am not like them. I am a general manger. These coworkers are grill & cashiers. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:16 PM Flag
»
ILY [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:20 PM Flag
»
OP: no. Law firm. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:17 PM Flag
»
Basically the same as a fast food restaurant [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:24 PM Flag
»
Obviously her clock was ticking and she couldn't get a man. Duh! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:25 PM Flag
[ - ] How screwed am I if I am 43 with a 50k retirement savings fund? 26 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 01:38 PM Flag
»
a lot less screwed than people without that amount, which are numerous. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 01:41 PM Flag
»
Plus one [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 01:42 PM Flag
»
That's not the full story. Maybe you have a pension. Maybe you have $5 million equity in a property. Maybe you will inherit money. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 01:42 PM Flag
»
LMAO! This might be true for less than 5% of GenX. Talk about being out of touch! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 01:56 PM Flag
»
You take things too literally. The point was that without knowing someone's ENTIRE financial picture, you know nothing. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 01:59 PM Flag
»
Wrong, you are totally out of touch. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:00 PM Flag
»
Less screwed than I am. 49 in debt. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 01:45 PM Flag
»
I am 40 and have ten times that. I feel screwed as well. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 01:51 PM Flag
»
so you're thinking she's like mega screwed or something... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 01:55 PM Flag
»
Believe it or not, that's MORE than the average $ saved by BOOMERS, who are retiring NOW, while you are GenX and have much more time to catch up. Given that American households only manage to save a tiny 5% of their HHI every year, you are doing pretty good! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 01:52 PM Flag
»
No one cares about the average boomer. We live in an 80/20 world, fast becoming a 99/1 world. If you're in or close to the top 1-20%, that is who you measure against. Go look up the median income for anywhere in the USA and ask anyone on this board if it's enough. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:06 PM Flag
»
You don't get it. If OP is screwed, so are pretty much all the boomers. Hence, deflation will kick in, making things easier (cheap real estate prices, for example, given that starving boomers will have to sell). [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:08 PM Flag
»
I have spent my whole life looking for a deflationary period, expecting one, and it has never happened. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:27 PM Flag
»
There is nothing you can do about the fact that this is where you are today. Nothing. Put that lamenting behind you. What can you do today (not tomorrow) to change that? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 01:53 PM Flag
»
I am feeling a little less depressed now, thank you. Question- is it better to put everything you've got into retirement savings or own a home ( nothing too impressive, approx 1700 sq ft)? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 01:54 PM Flag
»
Ideally, you own your home outright by retirement (so you don't have to pay rent or mortgage), plus have retirement savings. Any way you can fund both? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 01:58 PM Flag
»
I am saving for a down payment so it's killing retirement savings. Once I actually buy I think I'll be ok paying off the hous and funding retirement ( and some towards dc college). [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:09 PM Flag
»
Id split savings between down payment and retirement. Do not fund college before retirement. Can you do something to make extra money on the side? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:11 PM Flag
»
Yes, I have a side biz that is starting to pay off. My FT job doesn't have 401ks so I'm wondering if I can do more than an IRA by starting a 401 thru my side biz? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:27 PM Flag
»
With good health, you'll have more than enough time. Max out on your 401K from here on and save at least 10-15% of what you have after that. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:01 PM Flag
»
My company doesn't offer any retirement plans so I've been figuring it out on my own ( after getting divorced which decimated my savings entirely). I have a side biz, should I set up a retirement plan thru that? Like a 401 SEP? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:11 PM Flag
»
I think you can, yes, only because your company doesn't offer it and you have a side business. Go through vanguard. Do a 401 SEP and max that sucker out. Self employed, you can do more than just the 18000 annual max, depending on how much income you have from the side business. You don't have time on your side now so you need to max it like crazy. We are just a bit older than you and also in catch up mode. Also you can do an IRA (5,500) - either deductible if you fall in income limits, or a ROTH (if you fall in income limits.) We are past the income limits for deductible or ROTH so we do a non-deductible IRA and then immediately convert it to a ROTH IRA. We could not do this if we had any old traditional IRAs around because it wouldn't make sense tax-wise. What is the 50k you currently have in retirement in now? What kind of vehicle? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:27 PM Flag
»
Also if you have access to an HSA and a HDHP for health insurance, you can max the HSA and pay your medical expensive OOP. Money in an HSA can be invested however you want, and is tax free going in and coming out again. Save your receipts from any medical expenses and you can pull that money out any time in the future. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:31 PM Flag
»
This. My mother saved in a 401k and started late with it. She relocated to a LCOL after retirement and bought a cute house for around $100k. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:16 PM Flag
»
Thanks. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:28 PM Flag
»
I hope you enjoy the taste of cat food in retirement. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:31 PM Flag
[ - ] Feeling like a bad mom. My 14 yo (finishing 8th grade) is a night owl. This has always been true, but has gotten worse with adolescence. She typically goes to bed at around 11:00 and wakes up at 7:00. She has a lot of homework, but I know that a lot of time is lost on her phone/social media. She has (on her own) been better about turning off the phone when doing homework so that she isn't distracted by it, but I wonder if other parents of teens are more strict with evening phone use and enforcing a reasonable bed time. 11 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 01:31 PM Flag
»
if it's working, it's working. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 01:32 PM Flag
»
+1 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 01:36 PM Flag
»
OP-I guess it depends on how you define "working". Her grades are good (94% average), but she works hard and I don't think she gets enough sleep. I wonder sometimes if I'm too lenient. DH thinks that she's at the age where she needs to set her own priorities and learn from them (i.e., if she's tired, she'll make a change)--and that since her grades are high, we don't have any reason to come down on her and that socializing (through social media/phone) is one of the priorities she has right now. I talked to another mom yesterday with an 8th and 9th grader and they go to bed by 9:30 and have no phones. It made me wonder if I'm being too lax. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 01:41 PM Flag
»
I'd suggest a gentle nudge but not rules. It'll just piss her off and not teach her to self regulate. I cannot imagine telling my teens what their bed time is. My mom was all about rules and I hated it and felt like she never gave me room to figure things out for myself. Or the credit to think I was able. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 01:43 PM Flag
»
Thank you. Are you the mom below with 15 & 16 yo kids? This is what DH is basically saying--and our DD, too. She wants to be responsible for her work and her choices. DH and I were talking last night and he pointed out that she's someone who wants to learn through her own experience, which means that we may need to let her take her lumps (staying up too late and being tired the next day, consequences of procrastination or inefficient work habits that result in more time on homework than was necessary, etc.). He thinks some of this will iron out in HS. Do you agree? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 01:48 PM Flag
»
How are her grades? I haven't intervened (kids are 15 & 16) b/c mine care about getting good grades and make sure they do. I've suggested they work in the dining room w/ phones in the other room during midterms and they did follow that suggestion. also, once she hits HS and everyone starts talking college (it's immediate and kind of annoying) they do what they have to do to keep up. Good way to learn self discipline. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 01:38 PM Flag
»
Grades are good (I just posted above), and she doesn't seem to be tired during the day, but has a hard time waking up in the morning. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 01:44 PM Flag
»
Depends entirely on grades and her mood. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 01:39 PM Flag
»
Teen biology/brain chemistry dictates that sleep hormones don't kick in until later in the evening - most likely if you tried to get her to bed earlier she wouldn't sleep until 11 or 12 anyway. Blue light/screen time before bed can disrupt sleep patterns, so why not suggest she just turn off the computer half hour or so before bed, save her reading for then. 9:30 bedtime for a 14 year seems ridiculous, unless the kid is up at 5:30AM. Seems like your daughter is actually managing pretty well, most teens are slow to wake in the AM - thus the move to get High Schools to start later, not earlier in the morning. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 01:55 PM Flag
»
So she sleeps 8 hours? That sounds perfect for that age. I used to go to sleep at 10 -10:30 but got up before 7. I was always more than rested. In HS, I got up at 6 am. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:09 PM Flag
»
What time do you think teens go to bed? Mine was midnight--her brother in HS was 1am. He also got up at 6. He slept from 4-6pm when he got home. It was ridiculous and I did everything in my power to change it, but it was what it was. He's fine now as an adult. It's the teen years. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:29 PM Flag
[ - ] Thoughts on Bill, Hillary and the Energizer? 6 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 01:31 PM Flag
»
Hill knows Bill needs to get his batteries charged to keep going on the campaign trail. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 01:50 PM Flag
»
Doesn't bother anyone that Bill will have inside access and pillow talk to a SAHM party circuit lady will likely know too? What protections of national security secrets will there be? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:12 PM Flag
»
Bill is pretty experienced with the pillow talk, surely,unless he truly is losing his crackers. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:28 PM Flag
»
So what's new? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 01:51 PM Flag
»
That ho banged Bill while Hillary was out grocery shopping [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:03 PM Flag
»
Last time Bill was interested in Hillary's vagina was in the mid 80s, if that. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.30.16, 02:06 PM Flag
Refresh » New Post »
close [X]

close [X]

Select a Category (only 1)

category
Stages
Regions