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[ - ] Is Santa a pedophile? 0 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:49 AM Flag
[ - ] You guys who recommended The Affair were spot on. Good recommendation, and I don't say that easily! 5 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:42 AM Flag
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what is it? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:43 AM Flag
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It's a cable series for showpiece. But it pretty much sums up my experience of what this kind of affair is. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:50 AM Flag
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Sorry showtime ... Autocorrect does not like trademarks [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:50 AM Flag
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Ashleymadison? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:50 AM Flag
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I've seen every episode to date. The show is slow and pretty boring. Only watching because of the need to finish what I started. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:52 AM Flag
[ - ] What should I watch on Netflix? 7 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:40 AM Flag
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Freaks and Geeks [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:41 AM Flag
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X10000 one of the best shows [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:42 AM Flag
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Happy Valley [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:42 AM Flag
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Snowpiercer, Luther, advanced Style. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:43 AM Flag
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No. Ty for the recommendations! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:45 AM Flag
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Serlock [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:53 AM Flag
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*sherlock [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:53 AM Flag
[ - ] I am starting to panic about potty training ds. He will be 5 in April and still refuses to use the potty. I am terrified we won't get this fine by next fall, and then he won't be able to attend public kindergarten. Any btdt moms? I have read every article online, tried every trick in the book. 49 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:39 AM Flag
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Fake. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:40 AM Flag
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Um no, and I know I'm not the only one out there. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:40 AM Flag
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Dear god. Fake, please. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:46 AM Flag
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You're probably the only one with a 4.5 year old who has never been to preschool, though. Come on, OP. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:47 AM Flag
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I did not go to pre school. Nor did any of my siblings. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:47 AM Flag
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Yeah, 40 years ago. DIfferent times. And you probably still played with other kids frequently as a little kid. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:49 AM Flag
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Ds plays with his cousins and the kids in our building. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:50 AM Flag
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And what do they say when he has to have his diaper changed on on the side of the playground? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:51 AM Flag
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I never do that. We wait until we get home. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:52 AM Flag
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He wouldn't be playing with my kid in my house. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:53 AM Flag
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Well, how would I know. Both my ds were in underwear by 24 months [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:48 AM Flag
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Well my ds is reading already. Some kids are more advanced in other areas. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:49 AM Flag
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Reading by 5 isn't terribly unusual. Still crapping his pants, though....unusual. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:53 AM Flag
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Has he seen a neurologist? Maybe it's a true medical issue- no bowel/bladder control nerves for example [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:41 AM Flag
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I have talked to the pediatrician. She says it's not a physical issue, he appears to have bladder and Bowel control when he wants to, like if he is playing a favorite game on the iPad. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:42 AM Flag
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Omg this is terrifying. No advice here, but my ds just turned 3 and still in diapers. Refuses to use potty. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:41 AM Flag
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What do you mean refuses to use? What would happen if you took away his diaper - would he poop in his pants? On the floor? (Asking seriously, not meanly.) Do you make him clean up after himself? He is old enough to be grossed out so that might help. Could there be a medical issue? Control struggle? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:42 AM Flag
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Yes, we tried the no pants thing and he pooped and peed on the floor. My dh flipped out. It didn't seem to faze ds. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:43 AM Flag
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For how many weeks did you do it, though? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:44 AM Flag
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It was about a week, then we gave up because he was ruining all the carpets. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:44 AM Flag
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So you weren't taking him out of the house to play with other kids while he was diaper - free? I think that's the key. He needs to be laughed at by the other kids a few times in a serious way. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:45 AM Flag
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Won't that be damaging? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:46 AM Flag
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Ok, now I'm calling fake. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:47 AM Flag
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How the heck do you think kids get convinced to use the toilet? They see bigger kids do it, and they associate diapers with "babies", and they don't want to be a "baby" because they want the big kids to like them. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:48 AM Flag
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Ok I'm not going to shame him into it... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:48 AM Flag
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What exactly do you think is going to happen when he goes to K in diapers? And isn't he already shamed every time you leave the house and he's got a big fat diaper on and all the other kids on the playground his age are in underwear? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:50 AM Flag
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He doesn't see to notice or care. I don't point it out to him because I don't want to embarrass him. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:51 AM Flag
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Sorry OP, but it's time to embarrass him. I bet two times of saying "oops! Sorry Sally, we've got to go home now, Johnny pooped in his diaper and we need to go clean him" will potty train him in a snap. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:52 AM Flag
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no Isn't it damaging to be in public in diapers? Does he go to preschool? He must notice that the other kids wear underpants. Isn't there some peer pressure there? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:48 AM Flag
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he does not go to preschool [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:50 AM Flag
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This. Eww. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:49 AM Flag
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He's like a dog you can't housebreak. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:47 AM Flag
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yikes, I'm sorry. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:44 AM Flag
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Are you still ever giving him a diaper? I'd never let him use diapers, ever. And make it a long, drawn out process to clean him up where he has to miss a fun activity because he has to take a shower instead. No yelling or threatening- just "oh, you pooped yourself again? that's such a shame, because we had johnny's birthday party today. well, oh well, let's get you in the shower and changed and get those clothes in the laundry and see if we can make the very end of the party, but i doubt it." [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:42 AM Flag
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Yes he is in diapers, I don't know what else to do. I have tried no diapers and he will soil his underwear and not care. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:44 AM Flag
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Underwear? No underwear. Underwear catches it and makes it way less unpleasant. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:45 AM Flag
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He is old enough to help clean up. Make him pick the poop off the floor, get a rag for the pee, put his wet clothes in the washer. Obviously you'll fix it later, but you want him to realize it's more of a hassle to clean up than it is to walk over to the toilet in the first place. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:51 AM Flag
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grosssss [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:43 AM Flag
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This. Ugh. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:47 AM Flag
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Does he go to a 4s program where every other kid is potty trained? I'd think this would be motivation enough- he'll get laughed at and called a baby when he has an accident and he'll be trained within 2 days. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:43 AM Flag
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No, he's not in school yet. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:44 AM Flag
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ding ding ding! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:46 AM Flag
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np Yep. Exactly. Get him in pronto. He needs to be around other kids who will set the bar a little higher. He may not be able to get into a regular preschool with this issue, but I would get him into classes where he'll see other kids using the bathroom and realize he's the odd man out with the diaper. Or find an awesome program he wants to do and tell him he can't, they don't take kids in diapers. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:50 AM Flag
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Put him in freaking preschool! He's nearly 5! He'd have been trained 2 years ago if he'd simply been around other kids all day! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:46 AM Flag
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I honestly don't see the point of pre school. Plus it's so expensive. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:47 AM Flag
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You don't see the point, yet you're about to have a neurotypical 5 year old who doesn't see the point of not wearing diapers. Because he has zero peer interaction. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:51 AM Flag
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He has plenty of peer interaction. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:51 AM Flag
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Does he say WHY he doesn't want to use the toilet? Is he scared by the flush? Defying you? Looking for attention? It seems like a lot of trouble to go to for no reason. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:52 AM Flag
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I say, you pooped your pants, you are supposed to use the potty. He says "I don't care." [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:53 AM Flag
[ - ] "I love these moms! Love their kids! Love this town!" Guess what town this facebooker is in. 20 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:37 AM Flag
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And she's semi famous so I can actually post her public facebook [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:37 AM Flag
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Nashua? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:38 AM Flag
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No [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:38 AM Flag
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ROFL, I know no one's ever said that about Nashua! - NH Mom [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:43 AM Flag
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NYC. Obviously. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:39 AM Flag
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No [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:41 AM Flag
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Boise? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:40 AM Flag
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Lol [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:41 AM Flag
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Niggerville? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:40 AM Flag
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FAGGED AND COLLAPSED [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:41 AM Flag
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+1 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:42 AM Flag
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Ridgewood. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:42 AM Flag
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No but I'm sure it's been said there too [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:42 AM Flag
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Right county [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:42 AM Flag
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Ho-Ho-Kus? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:44 AM Flag
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Glen Rock. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:48 AM Flag
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valley stream? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:43 AM Flag
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This is not a very fun game. "This town?" "No". Repeat x30. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:44 AM Flag
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Ok party pooper. Tenafly. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:46 AM Flag
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Damn. I was about to guess Oradell. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:48 AM Flag
[ - ] rehash: i told you guys the other night that dave chapelle and john legend were smarter than idris elba, whom i cannot understand as a sex symbol, not that the other two are sex symbols. but they are at least attractive, which i don't think is the case for idris elba. maybe you guys just like meatheads. anyways, i found out that chapelle father was a professor and a statistician. his mother was a prof, too. see, i knew he was smarter but you guys didn't buy it. and of course, legend is a penn grad. so there you have it. smart dudes choose asian chicks. 11 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:30 AM Flag
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Chapelle is obviously very smart but seems depressive like most comics and isn't attractive. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:31 AM Flag
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he's attractive. if idris elba is attractive, dave chapelle is like rob lowe. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:35 AM Flag
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+1 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:43 AM Flag
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women who find blacks attractive are usually drawn to the animalistic, savage types. An egghead black just doesn't have that unthinking, instinctual, animal sexuality. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:33 AM Flag
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could be. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:36 AM Flag
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I didn't see the original post but smart men may or may not marry within their race. There are plenty of examples for both choices. What point are you trying to make? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:34 AM Flag
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my point was that smart men like asian women. the prob? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:38 AM Flag
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Study? Link? Any evidence aside from two examples of people you perceive as smart? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:41 AM Flag
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well, as it turns out, white-asian couples make the most money of all types of couples. so you draw your conclusion. and what is it? or do you believe income is not tied to intelligence? http://www.businessinsider.com/this-is-the-highest-earning-type-of-interracial-couple-2012-2 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:47 AM Flag
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put the bottle down, dear [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:37 AM Flag
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truth to power! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:48 AM Flag
[ - ] It is the beginning of the end for NYC. Police have been ordered to make no arrests unless necessary and not to respond to any calls without a partner. 16 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:27 AM Flag
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How is this the beginning of the end? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:28 AM Flag
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Only poor will want to stay. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:31 AM Flag
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Awesome, cheap rent for everyone! Get real OP. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:33 AM Flag
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LOL [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:42 AM Flag
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Kill them all let God sort them out [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:31 AM Flag
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Caedite eos. Novit enim Dominus qui sunt eius means "Kill them. For the Lord knows those that are His own." [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:50 AM Flag
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Why would they make unnecessary arrests? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:32 AM Flag
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Because people break the law. We will be back to squeegie men, people peeing on subways, more stuff like that. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:33 AM Flag
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Why aren't these necessary then? Your statement makes no sense. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:36 AM Flag
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you should probably move now while you can [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:36 AM Flag
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Bullshit. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:42 AM Flag
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No such order was made. The PBA aka union president is calling for that. He isn't in the chain of command. Maybe you shouldn't get your facts from right wing nutjobs. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:43 AM Flag
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np. So is the PBA prez basically calling for work slowdown? How unprofessional. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:51 AM Flag
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I don't understand why police show up anywhere alone. They should always be in pairs. This is better for everyone. Also, this is how it's handled in my small, European home country. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:45 AM Flag
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These cops were in a pair. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:48 AM Flag
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I respond to OP. I thought she questioned that they should show up in pairs and thought it was wrong. I think it's a good thing for both sides. This case is really sad and upsetting, and I agree that showing up in pairs doesn't solve all situations. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:49 AM Flag
[ - ] DH's sister married a very boring, dull guy with incredibly annoying parents. This year SIL and her family are coming to us as they went to her inlaws place last year. She called today to say that her inlaws decided to change their plans and now want to come to NY for the holidays to stay with them, which means she wants to bring them here. DH, his sister, their parents, me all can't stand these people, anything to do? 12 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:26 AM Flag
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Suck it up for one day [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:27 AM Flag
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Who the heck invites others to your house? With little notice? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:28 AM Flag
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Family with out of town relatives who will only be there like once or twice in a lifetime [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:31 AM Flag
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I would make diner myself then. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:34 AM Flag
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SIL is miserable too, they're going to ruin the holidays for all of us. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:40 AM Flag
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Just suck it up, you may be their only source of relief. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:34 AM Flag
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You are right to dread, but may not be as bad as you fear once you get into it [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:34 AM Flag
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it will be, third year in a row [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:40 AM Flag
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Then I guess just do what ever helps you deal. Drink more [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:44 AM Flag
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Of course you invite them and make them feel welcome. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:35 AM Flag
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Yes, be gracious hosts. This is what normal people do at the holidays. Be polite, be warm and kind, you can laugh about it later and make it a bonding experience. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:38 AM Flag
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No, wrong answer. Gracious guests do not bring along extras. They call and say, sorry, maybe next year. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:44 AM Flag
[ - ] Saul Alinsky's Rules for Radicals is the best leadership/management book I've ever read. MBA bros don't know what they're missing. 4 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:24 AM Flag
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How so? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:28 AM Flag
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Just a great guide to understanding people's motivations and organizing them to act for mutual benefit. Also he has a great dry "Jewish" sense of humor, reading the anecdotes in it I kept imagining him speaking in Larry David's voice. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:30 AM Flag
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Obama was hired by a Chicago community organizer who worked with Alinsky. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:50 AM Flag
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Yeah, I wondered why everyone was saying it's a bad thing and decided to read his book. He's not exactly a pinko commie or anything. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:53 AM Flag
[ - ] is there any doubt that de blasio and his black lesbian wife are secretly thrilled about these cops getting murdered? 19 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:16 AM Flag
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if you're a moron, then no [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:18 AM Flag
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Nope. No statement yet. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:18 AM Flag
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New York City Mayor Bill de Blasio, speaking after Bratton called the attack an "assassination" and said that when a police officer is attacked, every New York should feel as though they were attacked, too. “Although we are still learning the details, it’s clear that this was an assassination. These officers were shot execution style,” de Blasio said. “A particularly despicable act … when a police officer is murdered, it tears at the very foundation of our society.” "Our city is in mourning, our hearts are heavy," he said. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:28 AM Flag
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OP has made up her mind, facts are useless. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:31 AM Flag
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a quip taken from a statement to the press is not a "fact" [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:35 AM Flag
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This isn't a quip, it's a statement. So it is a fact that Or's assertion is incorrect. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:36 AM Flag
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see? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:37 AM Flag
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lol [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:43 AM Flag
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he can't be that thrilled. it means he has to do a press conference, show up to funerals, etc. more work is not his thing. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:21 AM Flag
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They do not want him at their funerals. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:21 AM Flag
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no, they talk retarded but they are not that retarded. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:22 AM Flag
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So sick of you morons. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:29 AM Flag
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hey, at least we're not retarded! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:40 AM Flag
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fuck that niggerlover [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:38 AM Flag
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when is santa going to damn give me my x-mas present? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:40 AM Flag
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santa is a nigger [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:44 AM Flag
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Your a sick fuck. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:40 AM Flag
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You're. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:41 AM Flag
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Your'e. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:42 AM Flag
[ - ] Have you heard of cheap bosses getting extra critical of an employee before bonus time so says to lower the bonus expectation? 9 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:09 AM Flag
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^^^ so as to... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:10 AM Flag
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lol yes. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:14 AM Flag
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OP. This just happened to me, I think. I generally get enough praise at work, but the last few months have been rather slow and boss was criticizing everything I did the last few days, even though it certainly wasn't wrong or in any way worse than what he does. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:15 AM Flag
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helpful hint I learned: bonuses have little to do with performance and everything to do with retention. performance is a just-so story to justify the bonus number. people who have options and who are valuable to the organization (usually good performers that year, but could also mean they'll be good performers in the coming years) have leverage to get a bigger bonus. the very notion of it being a "performance bonus" boxes you into arguing about things in the wrong way. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:27 AM Flag
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OP. I don't intend to stay much longer if I don't get a decent bonus, or the flexibility I was promised when I was hired. It is an either or thing for me. This is a small market (not NYC) and I am guaranteed a better job, but I could certainly try. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:31 AM Flag
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Meant to say, I am NOT guaranteed a better job... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:36 AM Flag
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Then say that when they tell you your number. That it's disappointing compared to what you think you could get elsewhere. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:40 AM Flag
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Yes, every year, me [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:37 AM Flag
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OP. Wow, I thought this was just me. Do you still get a bonus? I thought my boss was unique in that regard and I was seriously concerned until I figured that was the reason.... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:40 AM Flag
[ - ] Is it fair that the WOH spouse spends 12 hours on the weekend alone with kids and the SAH spouse puts them to bed after that? Or would you require the exhausted WOH spouse to put the kids to sleep as well? 49 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:07 AM Flag
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No, I would cut off SAH's credit cards. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:08 AM Flag
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This. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:12 AM Flag
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I don't think that having a job allows you to excuse yourself from being a parent. If the kids are very small, why not both of you putting them to bed together? That's what we always did. After that we just kind of switched off unless one of us was sick or something. Why try to get out of it? Did the WOH one not want to have kids in the first place? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:23 AM Flag
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does the SAH get a break during the week. Maybe put kids in a program for a few hours. 24/7 is too much for anyone at any job. need change [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:10 AM Flag
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Kids are in school from 8:30 to 3. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:11 AM Flag
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Then SAHM needs to deal with it. Cut off CCs [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:13 AM Flag
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And sleep 9 hours a day. There is no 24/7. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:13 AM Flag
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wow, if kids are in school that long, that's a long break everyday! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:16 AM Flag
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It is obviously not 24/7 as other spouse has had them 12 hours on weekend already. Do you not understand what 24/7 means? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:12 AM Flag
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OP. The kids are in cash holo full time and sleep at night (9-10 hours). It is definitely not 24/7. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:13 AM Flag
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Ugh - in school full time.. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:13 AM Flag
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sorry, sounds like SAH is not taking advantage!! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:21 AM Flag
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This. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:30 AM Flag
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Do either of you LIKE your kids? Why did you have them, btw? If they seem only like chores, something needs to change. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:12 AM Flag
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SAH seems lazy. WOH seems tired. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:13 AM Flag
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I bet the SAH would tell it differently. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:17 AM Flag
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Not unless OP is flat out lying. SAH and kids in school. Lazy. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:18 AM Flag
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This. "The weekends are my only down time- my DH misses the kids so much during the week and he loves playing with them on the weekends but then he wants me to do the dirty work and try to calm them down, bathe them, and get them to bed after he's spent all day winding them up and getting them hyper and off schedule I told him, if you want to get them like this every weekend, then YOU put them to bed. It's impossible to undo the state he's gotten them into by the end of the day!! WWYD?" [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:18 AM Flag
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Stop at the sentence, my only downtown. They go to school 8-3. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:19 AM Flag
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Or, ignore that sentence if you want, and read the rest of the post instead. It's completely valid. The non-SAH parent always riles the kids up on the weekend, and then at the end of the day he throws up his hands and say "you fix this, I'm tired." Well, easier said than done, pal. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:21 AM Flag
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Then SAH should tell him, you need to let me take over at say 5 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:22 AM Flag
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OP. This may be what your family life is like but I almost always out my kids to bed. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:23 AM Flag
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OP here. I took them to afternoon tea, I took them to the playground, I dealt with a meltdown of the little one at the dinner table. I am tired and the only thing I have asked of DH was to out them to bed. He is doing but I had to coax him to do it. I don't think it's fair. I out them to bed every day except maybe 1-2 times per month when I have to work late or on a day like this (didn't mention that I am battling a cold too - didn't think it was relevant). [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:22 AM Flag
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If you put them to bed every night to give him a break- this is the most relevant part. Of course he should take over bedtime duties a few days a week. I'm on your side. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:36 AM Flag
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I don't really do it to give him a break tbh, because he gets almost 6 hours when they are in school. I do it because I like doing it and they want me to do it rather than him. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:38 AM Flag
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Do either of you LIKE your kids? Why did you have them, btw? If they seem only like chores, something needs to change. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:12 AM Flag
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This is just a dumb response. If someone is exhausted after 12 hours spent with the DCs, the other person should be able to put them to sleep. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:14 AM Flag
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OR: yea no, think im hitting a nerve. Apparently you both are dying for time away from kids. Sad. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:16 AM Flag
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Oh please. One works full time, and needs a break. The other does not work and has kids in school. Second one gets a break every frigging day. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:18 AM Flag
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The second one gets a break every day too- from the time he gets home until the time he goes to bed! And sometimes he gets to relax for 45min for lunch, too, probably. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:20 AM Flag
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Less than other gets. By a long shot. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:22 AM Flag
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OP. Especially when the second shift starts the minute I walk into the door, meanwhile SAHP gets to relax and watch TV, after having been off from 9-2:30 (I am not counting pick up and drop off as free time here). [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:27 AM Flag
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If the SAH gets both breaks- evening break when other parent is home, plus day break when kids are in school- then that's obviously one sided. I'd make some changes stat. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:37 AM Flag
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So the SAHD never does bedtime? Yeah, you should have mentioned that in the OP, that's a big detail to omit [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:39 AM Flag
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Sometimes woh parent their children. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:16 AM Flag
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Sounds like a loaded question. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:17 AM Flag
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+1. I don't understand these tit for tat marriages. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:18 AM Flag
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No, sounds like one lazy spouse. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:20 AM Flag
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Sounds like 2 to me. You get the kids thrown off their schedule all day and full of hyper energy, you put them to bed and deal with how difficult that is. You keep the kids sane and on schedule all day, like a parent- I'm happy to do bedtime routine, no problem at all. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:22 AM Flag
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Stop this nonsense now. I put them to sleep almost every day out of the year. The only time I don't do it is when I work or am sick (although I usually do it even if I am sick). A WOH doesn't have the right to be exhausted once in her life. What phoniness. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:25 AM Flag
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np- you really should have clarified that, as most people will assume the SAH usually does bedtime routine. sounds like you set yourself up for people to argue with you so that you can argue back with them. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:39 AM Flag
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I don't want to argue - I am too exhausted. No one asked me who outs them to sleep and people apparently just assumed I was a slacker. Anyway, thanks for all your help, I will go to sleep now. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:41 AM Flag
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^^^ autocorrect seems to change my "put" into "out". Sorry [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:42 AM Flag
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Tell spouse you have had enough. Spouse either changes or you cut off any discretionary funds. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:25 AM Flag
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So OP is a WOHM and dad is SAH? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:31 AM Flag
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Yes - I initially phrased it as gender neutral because I didn't want to get stereotype answers. I think if I were the SAHM, I would have gotten more sympathy though! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:34 AM Flag
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You would have. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:43 AM Flag
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Why don't you all spend time together, or separate for one-on-one time with each kid? Dh and I each have time for alone time over the weekends, some full-family time (dinner), and some time with each kid. He generally puts kids to bed while I wash dishes so we can hang out after the go to sleep. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:31 AM Flag
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We went to afternoon tea at a nice hotel (not NYC) and DH isn't into it. After than we went to a playground, before that we went to do some Christmas shopping. All things that DH doesn't necessarily enjoy. He also had to do a few things. This is not normal for us - we usually do plenty of things together on weekends. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:32 AM Flag
[ - ] Do you know I had no idea 'communications major' was supposed to be lame/dumb until I came to UB? I make 1.6 MM a year in Hollywood - I don't feel bad. 29 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:07 AM Flag
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Really? That's what all the football players majored in [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:09 AM Flag
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+1 I was in a similar major, and even we looked down on the communications majors. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:24 AM Flag
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UB is quick to pile on to a lot of bullshit ... Most of the people making the predictions have younger kids [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:10 AM Flag
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This. And SAHM. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:14 AM Flag
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snooooze [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:31 AM Flag
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Most of these women lie their asses off. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:13 AM Flag
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Sure you do.... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:14 AM Flag
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If you add up all the salaries people on UB claim for themselves and their DHs, you get a number larger than US GDP. Remarkable, really. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:20 AM Flag
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+a million [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:22 AM Flag
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I know! So true. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:23 AM Flag
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us gdp is 350 trillion, knucklehead. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:23 AM Flag
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sorry -- 17 trillion [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:26 AM Flag
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It was a joke. You take things too literally. Are you on the spectrum? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:27 AM Flag
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it wasn't a very good joke. that was the point. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:31 AM Flag
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STEM mom. Cannot bear STEM people. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:31 AM Flag
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I don't think she's in STEM. I'm not even sure she's a she. It's one particular poster that hasn't yet figured out English capitalization. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:52 AM Flag
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it's a major for hot USC girls who work in HR, make of that what you will. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:14 AM Flag
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I very seriously doubt that you could get into HR with a communications degree. Maybe if you had a masters or something. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:25 AM Flag
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lol what? most HR girls are hired for their looks. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:28 AM Flag
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you're thinking PR [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:32 AM Flag
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no, HR. I meant at startups and small businesses, not F500s. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:43 AM Flag
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CSB [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:17 AM Flag
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how about your classmates? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:19 AM Flag
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My friend grad with a communications major and works at E! so I guess the joke is on me [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:26 AM Flag
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Curious - how did you do it.? I think it's very hard to make that kind of money with such a major. Congrats! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:28 AM Flag
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She does it, so everyone can! Best kind of evidence. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:32 AM Flag
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I think UB just has a hard time admitting that being a straight A student in a tt major at a tt school is not the biggest determinant of eventual success. If they admit that, they have to admit that they are not in fact in control of their dc's loves and cannot guarantee their financial security and spot in the umc - and that's just unacceptable. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:33 AM Flag
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it's all about odds. gotta maximize the odds cuz that's the only thing you can do. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:41 AM Flag
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Who cares asshole. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:45 AM Flag
[ - ] ExDH wants me to have lunch with him and his GF of one year so that I can meet her. Would you? Is this a normal request? 33 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:06 AM Flag
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no and no [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:07 AM Flag
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+1 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:09 AM Flag
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If you have kids yes, it's really nice if he wants to introduce you before introducing the kids [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:07 AM Flag
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He should be handling his kids, not his flavor of the month. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:09 AM Flag
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We do have kids, but they met her several months ago - she is now around a fair amount. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:12 AM Flag
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For what purpose? Is she parenting your kids soon? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:07 AM Flag
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She is around a decent bit I think, but not really parenting them in any way [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:12 AM Flag
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OP and I did ask him "for what purpose" and he said it is very important to him and he thinks it is "valuable." [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:14 AM Flag
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Ask why? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:15 AM Flag
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See above, I did and I got the vague response of it being important and valuable and he seemed perplexed that I didn't immediately view it the same way. He also referenced it being important for the kids (they don't like her much, though I think it has less to do with her per se, and more to do with the fact that he brought her into their life in a pretty big way and she consumes a lot of his attention now). [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:18 AM Flag
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I was asking for more specific answer from him. Tell him "valuable" isnt specific enough and you need to know why and details. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:21 AM Flag
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He wants to announce they're pregnant. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:08 AM Flag
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How rude. Not in person. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:12 AM Flag
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No, they definitely aren't pregnant [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:13 AM Flag
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was he snipped? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:19 AM Flag
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No no [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:10 AM Flag
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Are hey getting married? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:10 AM Flag
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I don't think so. Possible I guess, but I really doubt it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:13 AM Flag
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Then no. I don't care what he says. It is an odd request and you have the right to say no. I wouldn't touch this with a ten foot pole. Fuck him [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:24 AM Flag
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It's her idea. No thanks [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:10 AM Flag
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you think so? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:12 AM Flag
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I can guarantee you it's not her idea. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:14 AM Flag
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I would do this. I think it's gracious of him (and her) to offer, and likely in the best interest of your children. If you are not happy and in love now you will be soon, and the healthier you are the more likely you are to meet someone fabulous for yourself. It might not be easy and a coffee might be easier than lunch, but I would do it. xo [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:20 AM Flag
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I am not necessarily opposed, if anything I am kind of indifferent. And on my end, I am happy, so that isn't the issue. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:24 AM Flag
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OMG. Does she have to meet all his GF? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:25 AM Flag
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If you have kids, of course it's normal. It's actually very thoughtful on both of their parts. You are being extremely immature about this. Grow up and take care of your family. You need to know this woman and what she's like. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:26 AM Flag
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Wow. I am grown up. I do take care of my family. I work hard to co-parent as best we can. I am not sure how me asking this question makes me immature. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:29 AM Flag
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No, OP has no need to meet this person. Her Ex is in charge of kids when they are with him. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:29 AM Flag
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+1 Of course it's hard, but it should give you peace of mind to know the adults who spend time around your kids, esp in a house/at night. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:34 AM Flag
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She certainly knows one of them. He should be able to handle parenting. If not, he shouldnt get parenting time. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:36 AM Flag
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You are kidding yourself if you think the dc will never be alone with the girlfriend of one year. I would want to know any adult who was spending a lot of time with my kids, whether ex was present or not. Don't you want to know your kids' teachers, their friends' parents, etc? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:45 AM Flag
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OP and honestly, it isn't that I think it is going to be hard. I just am a bit indifferent I guess. I hadn't really thought about it from a peace of mind perspective - my general thinking is that it is his job to parent, not hers. Also, my DCs are teens so it doesn't seem at this point that she would really stepping in to be "mom." [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:44 AM Flag
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Assuming you and ex have kids together and ex is getting really serious with girlfriend and expects her to be around the kids, I'd really appreciate this request. In my case, I got to meet ex's long-term girlfriend at family funeral, which really wasn't ideal. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:29 AM Flag
[ - ] so where is that buffoon al sharpton now?? 3 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:06 AM Flag
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Probably out celebrating somewhere. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:10 AM Flag
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I was thinking the same thing. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:22 AM Flag
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he made a statement saying any killings in the name of eric garner or mike brown are reprehensible - but who cares about facts? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.21.14, 01:35 AM Flag
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