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[ - ] DH has gone off sex since dd was born 8 years ago. It's got to the stage where we've argued about it, he said he'll try harder, nothing happens....I'm hugely sexually frustrated and now embarked on a fling thing with an attached man. We're both in it for the sex...sounds very seedy and it won't go anywhere, but it is making me feel desirable and needed for once in my sad lonely life. Does anyone think this okay? Has anyone been in the same situation. I just can't live like a nun for the rest of my life and dh refuses to deal with the situation (to be honest, I don't even want to be intimate with him now as I know his feelings towards me physically....I don't want to be a pity f**k 15 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
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[ - ] Can someone tell me about Browning? Why does everyone think it is a joke? Are the boys there really learning disabled? 4 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
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General Topics 10.23.08, 02:44 PM Flag
[ - ] i'm NOT a sarah palin fan by any means, but i'm sort of hating that the media is going after her new wardrobe in such detail. granted, it was a huge expense, but something about the way that they're showing the photos and humiliating her for her outfits feels incredibly sexist & misogynist. 41 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
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General Topics 10.23.08, 02:15 PM Flag
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Great analogy! Yes, she is a LOT "Evita-esque"...and I, for one, am scared. [ Reply | More ]
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General Topics 10.28.08, 06:29 AM Flag
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I disagree-- they're humiliating her for her hypocrisy, which is more than fair game [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.31.08, 05:07 PM Flag
[ - ] i want to cry, i feel like an idiot... i bought something today at an antique store as a gift and i found it on the internet for 1/3 of the price...i am so angry and embarrassed...no refunds just store credit.. i dont want to ever shopt ere...how to feel better ? 13 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 10.23.08, 01:56 PM Flag
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you can try to talk to the salesperson sometimes places do make exceptions even if they say they don't [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.23.08, 01:58 PM Flag
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i am too embarrassed to go back. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.23.08, 02:01 PM Flag
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i wish my husband could go for you, he loves to get all outraged. he'd take care of it [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.23.08, 02:02 PM Flag
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can he ? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.23.08, 02:04 PM Flag
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how muchdid you spend? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.23.08, 02:06 PM Flag
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and what was it? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.23.08, 02:07 PM Flag
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70 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.23.08, 02:09 PM Flag
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go to the store and tell them and try to get your $ back. and if they say no, tell them that's bad business practice and you're going to report them on yelp, or somesuch [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.23.08, 02:01 PM Flag
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op: do i still give the gift to the person ? she may not know how much i spent. she would be probably think i was crazy to spend that much if she knew. i know nothing about antiques...not sure how authentic it is in the first place. i feel like a total idiot [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.23.08, 02:06 PM Flag
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i need to know what it is [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.23.08, 02:08 PM Flag
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silverplated serving utensil for someone who collect different pieces [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.23.08, 02:10 PM Flag
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^^who collects [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.23.08, 02:10 PM Flag
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get a tattoo on the back of your right hand: caveat emptor. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.23.08, 02:19 PM Flag
[ - ] I let my 9 yo 4th grader walk to school alone every morning. Brooklyn, 3 commercial blocks... No cell phone, but serious self-defense skills (black belt). Am I wrong? 15 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
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General Topics 10.23.08, 04:59 PM Flag
[ - ] How come some parents do not send thank you cards for bday gifts? I am so upset at a friend - every year the same thing. And I go out of my way to buy really nice gifts for her children. 11 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 10.23.08, 01:48 PM Flag
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too busy - not into it. I sometimes feel the same way about SIL who never sends thank yous, but she is appreciative and just not into the thank you thing. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.23.08, 01:51 PM Flag
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I have not sent out individualized thank you notes in years. I send a blast email thank you. Too many presents and the DCs do not cooperate in waiting for me to write down who gave what to whom. If you want a personalized thank you note, then you should hand the card to the parent and state in the card what you gave--something along the lines of Hope so and so enjoys [gift]. We have huge parties and cannot do custom hand written cards. Give very generous goody bags instead as "thank you". [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.23.08, 01:51 PM Flag
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LOL. You're killing me. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.23.08, 01:52 PM Flag
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ooh I wish all parents would do this it would def cut down time on writing those silly lists [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.23.08, 01:54 PM Flag
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OP; You would think she would at least send a thank you email - not even that! Just really irks me. Especially when the rest of my friends are so good at it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.23.08, 01:53 PM Flag
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OR. Well she should at least send an email. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.23.08, 02:00 PM Flag
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some people don't send ty notes. my sister in law is like that but i don't let it bother me. you should not give a gift to receive a ty note. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.23.08, 02:03 PM Flag
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DF did not have dc send thank you for bar mitvah gifts...we gave $$$ too. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.23.08, 02:08 PM Flag
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now that's rude. it also teaches the child poor manners. this is the equivalent of not sending a wedding gift thank you. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.23.08, 02:15 PM Flag
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you know what? if relatives/ good friends give gifts in person then a thank you in person is fine. these birthday parties with the whole class invited drive me nuts. It's kids giving kids presents. I don't think mom should be writing the thank you notes at all -- it's done because mothers judge other mothers. When the kid is old enough to write then he or she writes the notes. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.23.08, 02:17 PM Flag
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i think thank you notes should be abolished for young kids. waste of paper. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.23.08, 02:19 PM Flag
[ - ] anyone have a book recommendation on bullying (kindergarten) - my daughter has a new "friend" who is quite pushy, bossy and possessive of her - teacher does see her bullying my daughter as well. trying to give my dd tips on how to deal. 10 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
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General Topics 10.23.08, 02:50 PM Flag
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This seems common at this age. I don't see possessive friends as "bullies" but I see your point, in fact it does put a lot of pressure on the kid. My DC experienced the same, we talked about handling it in an assertive yet non hostile way. Kind of assuring your DC that they don't have to play with so and so, that so and so is not in charge, your DC is in charge of their own friendships, helped us. However, I get the feeling that the mom of one the bossy friends my DC now avoids is somewhat peeved with me. She may just hear that my DC ignores her kid. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.24.08, 06:43 AM Flag
[ - ] I just received an "invitation" informing me of the date and time of our 1st parent/teacher conference. I want to ask the right questions, where can Igo to get a list? Is there a site? Has anyone BTDT and had a great conference? 13 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 10.23.08, 01:34 PM Flag
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ok, take a deep breath. is this for preschool? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.23.08, 01:36 PM Flag
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OP:yes [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.23.08, 01:39 PM Flag
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it isnt a competition. its a chance to learn about your kid and how school is going. are there things you are curious about? worried? those are the questions you have. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.23.08, 01:41 PM Flag
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OP: I just want to make sure she is where she should be for her age, what she should work on with us at home, and how she is doing with separation. I get a quick she was ok today when I pick her up, but somehow I feel like the teachers may be playing down her apprehensiveness. She tells me she sometimes cries. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.23.08, 01:46 PM Flag
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well, there you go. ask those qiestions, although they are also probably issues the teachers will want to discuss anyway. I found that preschool teachers were really good at letting you know that your kid was acting in an age approproate way, or not. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.23.08, 01:49 PM Flag
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Do you think they ever lie? I am just concerned that they want us to keep her enrolled and enroll again for next year. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.23.08, 01:50 PM Flag
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the teachers don't have any incentive to lie and i really doubt they do it. they are teachers because they love kids and want to teach them. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.23.08, 01:54 PM Flag
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ITA. Take a step back. The only "right" questions are things you want to know. Don't look on the web, just think about it. Don't make a long list either, because the teacher will have a bunch she wants to tell you. If you have 3 or so things you really want to know (doesn't sound like you do or you wouldn't be asking) keep it short and simple. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.23.08, 01:39 PM Flag
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OP: Do you know how much time is usually booked for the conference? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.23.08, 01:41 PM Flag
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depends on the school, but IME it's never longer than 20 minutes. It can be as little as 10. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.23.08, 01:56 PM Flag
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15-20 minutes most, and the teacher has a prepared 'speech' for the first 10 minutes [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.23.08, 01:58 PM Flag
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OP: oh my, a speech yikes. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.23.08, 02:00 PM Flag
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prepared comments sounds better? Just wanted to say it will not be all about you asking, the teacher will start and what she says will likely jolt some questions if you don't have any yet. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.23.08, 02:02 PM Flag
[ - ] Is it unrealistic that I'll find a 2BR for 3500 a month? Seems like from online listings that there are plenty. Is something dreadfully wrong with all these places? 43 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
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public housing projects, aka the projects, is low-income housing. same thing [ Reply | More ]
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General Topics 10.24.08, 11:45 AM Flag
[ - ] If you fell in love with a married man, would you consider having you each leave your families to be together? Or under no circumstances would you consider this? 58 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
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General Topics 10.24.08, 06:26 AM Flag
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We did, thank goodness. Best decision we ever made. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.24.08, 11:27 AM Flag
[ - ] How do you decide when your kids start pre-school? I'm sorry if this seems nuts to ask. DD is 3, I feel like she's not ready. Why is pre-school necessary? Honest question. 7 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 10.23.08, 01:15 PM Flag
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not necessary. however, your child wil transtion more easily into K if she's had some school experience already --socialization among other things. and given how academic K is getting, its nice fro them to have some school first. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.23.08, 01:17 PM Flag
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Got it. I do notice that my DD, who didn't do as many classes as some of her peers, tends to wander off and do her own thing. Other kids are already pros at circle time. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.23.08, 01:18 PM Flag
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so preschool can help her with those routines. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.23.08, 01:23 PM Flag
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thanks for the feedback! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.23.08, 01:25 PM Flag
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also, many K's are going to expect kids to have some basic skills and knowledge. you may be covering that stuff at home, but preschool will make sure its done. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.23.08, 01:33 PM Flag
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i don't feel it's necessary at all. growing up, i didn't go to pre-k and neither did any of my friends from back home. all of us seem to have adjusted fine to K and beyond. as long as you're teaching her stuff at home (the basics, alphabet, numbers etc) and she has friends, playdates and perhaps a couple of classes a week (music, dance, whatever), she will be totally fine. kids adapt quickly. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.23.08, 01:52 PM Flag
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ita. if mom stays at home, i really don't understand why the kid has to be school so early. i just think the moms don't want to deal with their children every day and want more time for themselves. which is ok, of course. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.23.08, 01:54 PM Flag
[ - ] How much would you estimate (rough is ok) it would cost to gut renovate a 600 sq foot one bedroom apartment using basic (ie nonluxury, home depot quality, materials) Small kitchen, one small bathroom, living room, bedroom. Windows are new. So new walls, floors, doors, ceilings, bathroom, kitchen, upgraded electric. and waht if I kept the old kitchen but renovated everything else. really need thoughts/advice. TIA 7 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 10.23.08, 01:14 PM Flag
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about 80K with an independent guy. def under 100K [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.23.08, 01:15 PM Flag
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^^ have gut renovated 3 apartments in past 7 years [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.23.08, 01:15 PM Flag
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general rule of thumb in NYC is $350/foot [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.23.08, 01:33 PM Flag
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so, 210K is what you think it would cost her? No way. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.23.08, 01:36 PM Flag
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I think this is accurate in NYC. She might be able to do a gut for $300/foot but it would be hard. Upgrading electric can be expensive. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.23.08, 01:39 PM Flag
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I am the first OR. I have done 3 gut renovations (EVERYTHING) for much less than 300sq ft - like 150sqft. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.23.08, 01:42 PM Flag
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np: I gut renovated my 1500 sq ft apt on the UWS three years ago for 80K. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.23.08, 02:23 PM Flag
[ - ] I know people hate this, but name the celebs at your private school and we'll try and guess which NYC private school it is? Anyone game? 1 Reply [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 10.23.08, 01:12 PM Flag
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no one gives up celebs at their own schools. it's like talking bad about your family [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.23.08, 02:27 PM Flag
[ - ] our two older DCs were both 99's, no surprise, but #3 is a ninety-FOUR, and we really can't have THAT. We are going to have him put down. Do you think animal control would handle it? WWYD? 3 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 10.23.08, 01:12 PM Flag
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drive to nebraska and leave him there [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.23.08, 01:12 PM Flag
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what if he finds his way back? Dogs do it, and they're like, what, 92's? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.23.08, 01:14 PM Flag
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Teehee. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.23.08, 01:13 PM Flag
[ - ] WWYD: Went to pick DC up at daycare yesterday and walked in to find daycare providers teenage son (Age 17) with my DC and one other. He said his mom "had to run out". She goes to a home daycare that has been amazing up till this point. Im so upset. I dont want to take her out but just feel this isnt right. 8 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 10.23.08, 01:03 PM Flag
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I would find another daycare. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.23.08, 01:05 PM Flag
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I would find yourself a new daycare [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.23.08, 01:06 PM Flag
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my step-mother ran home day care for years and my half-brother helped her out all the time; all of the kids loved him - i don't know that she would have ever left him alone - esp. without notifying the parents - but the parents probably would have been OK with it in that case - thinking of the school-aged dcs she used to watch after school. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.23.08, 01:07 PM Flag
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thx. my dc is 13 months. she seemed fine but the other girl was hysterical. im just bummed bc we really loved her. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.23.08, 01:09 PM Flag
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np: make sure you tell daycare provider why you are leaving and what you saw (hysterical baby). [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.23.08, 01:11 PM Flag
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I would speak to the woman and find out what her story was. I would express that this wasn't okay. I wouldn't uproot DC if everything has otherwise been okay. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.23.08, 01:52 PM Flag
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Find another place. Who knows how often this has happened and will happen again? I also strongly suspect that she violated the terms of her license by leaving the kids with 17 year old (I'm assuming she's licensed). [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.23.08, 01:52 PM Flag
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My stepmother also ran a home daycare for many years, but she never would have left the kids with another adult in the house, unless it was to run to the bathroom or something like that. I would not feel comfortable with what happened to you. Start looking. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.23.08, 01:59 PM Flag
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