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[ - ] Is it just me or does it bother people when another parent yells at your dc while you are standing there and not doing anything remotely incorrect? I have a friend who routinely screams at my dcs for things that I don't think they are doing wrong-just not something she would allow her dd to do. And by screaming, I mean screaming and by in front of me, I mean she sticks her arse in my face and bends over to discipline my dss for no apparent reason that nobody (others have commented on how harsh she is to my dc) can see. Any advice? 17 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 11:17 AM Flag
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Drop that bitch and as you are doing it get in her face and tell her not to ever do that shit again. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 11:18 AM Flag
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I like you......it's hubby's friend's wife though [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 11:32 AM Flag
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So? Hubby is capable of getting together with his friend. You don't have to do it family wide [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 11:43 AM Flag
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yeah he is able.....not his fault or his friend....I dont' control my husband......what about birthday parties? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 12:23 PM Flag
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Odd. Very curious as to what your dcs are doing that your friend gets so worked up. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 11:24 AM Flag
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me too. It sounds like not the kind of person you want to be friends with BUT, first I want to know what your kid is doing. Are you sure you're not too lenient? (But the yelling is out of line and reason enough to drop the "friend.") [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 11:26 AM Flag
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well, if its her house, she makes the rules. You can say, "that was a little harsh" and then repeat the message to your dc in a manner that you would prefer (ie, Johnny, Susan doesn't allow people to put their feet on the sofa at her house, so you need to stop doing that). You did say she was a friend - I would think that two adult friends would be able to talk aboutt this. You can say, you speak to your child in a way that johnny isn't used to hearing. I"m not saying it is right or wrong, but I think it would probably work out better, if you either told me the problem, or tired to speak to him just a little kinder/gentler. IF the two of you are at a playground and Johnny hasn't touched her dc, or taken a toy or called a name, then I can't imagine what she would be correcting him about. I'd then say, Friend, we allow him to shoot water balloons at the playground. Then I would probably say, dc, Friend doesn't allow her child to do that, so let's try and find something that both of you can do together and you can play with the balloons later, kwim? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 11:32 AM Flag
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one time the 6YO was opening the lid of a cooler to get himself a bottle of water in someone else's house, one time 6YO was walking behind a seagull on the beach (he can swim and was no where near the ocean)-kept saying "COME BACK HERE"-got mad when I said "I can see him!"-one time 2YO walked into her bathroom (GET OUT OF MY BATHROOM!)-he's pottytrained; and the LAST time, 6YO and another boy were playing pirates and my ds was running and screaming-outside-at a park-told to BE QUIET!.. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 11:35 AM Flag
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I believe you posted about the cooler incident before, so this must really bother you. BTW, I didn't ask for any details - and I think that by posting so many you have crossed a line. She is easily identifiable to all who know her. Maybe its time for the two of you to admit that you really aren't friends after all and cool it before you become habitual frenemies. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 11:38 AM Flag
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and if you really value and want to keep the friendship, then maybe you can see each other without the children. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 11:41 AM Flag
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How in heaven's name would anyone who knows this woman be able to identify her with the info op's given?! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 11:54 AM Flag
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I'm kind of wondering the same thing however I am reenraged because she has been telling people my dcs are wild when I just received a progress report on the older one that his academics are above average and he is being the "model" (teacher's word) of behavior in the classroom....I did used to really really like her.....she used to be fun and nice until she had kids and became supermom [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 12:09 PM Flag
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If you can step outside yourself for a moment and try to objectively look at your dcs' behavior do you see anything that would warrant a raised voice? If not, it's pretty clear you should end the friendship. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 12:28 PM Flag
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raise and cautionary voices are okay...screaming absolutely not [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 12:41 PM Flag
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One person's "screaming" is another person's "raised and cautionary voice". Op's definition of screaming involving an arse stuck in her face as the friend bends over to discipline OP's kids seems quite odd. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 12:44 PM Flag
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Say to her 'Please let me discipline my own children'. This is not someone I would be spending time with. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 12:36 PM Flag
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I think it is unacceptable for you to allow anyone to treat your child like this. If you ask her not to and she persists I wouldn't have dc near her. She sounds out of control herself. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 12:45 PM Flag
[ - ] If you are in a interracial/cultural/ethnic marriage, please describe the mix 24 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 11:16 AM Flag
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mexican american, asian [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 11:19 AM Flag
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Chinese/Caucasian-Jewish. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 11:26 AM Flag
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us too! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 05:13 PM Flag
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lemme guess. you're chinese, he's jewish. he makes lots of $$, you're a size 0. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 05:24 PM Flag
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and hes 4'11" [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 05:26 PM Flag
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I'm Chinese, he's Jewish, he makes lots of money and so do I. I'm a size 8. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 06:41 PM Flag
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Good answer! Way to put them in their place. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 06:55 PM Flag
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Black/white [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 11:27 AM Flag
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Republican/Democrat :) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 11:33 AM Flag
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lol, is that diversity too? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 11:34 AM Flag
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german lutheran/hungarian jewish [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 11:58 AM Flag
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Southern/Jerseyite [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 12:18 PM Flag
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Scottish/English [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 12:33 PM Flag
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white (me)/ whiter (DH) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 12:34 PM Flag
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lol, whats whiter than white? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 12:49 PM Flag
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Lutherans [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 04:25 PM Flag
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i was raised lutheran and i'm part white/part black/part jew. (though i totally get the blond minnesotan stereotype!) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 04:30 PM Flag
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Black/Latino [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 12:48 PM Flag
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White/Mexican [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 04:13 PM Flag
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Martian - Venutian [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 04:27 PM Flag
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Korean/Caucasian--Lutheran/Episcopalian from English German Scottish decent. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 04:52 PM Flag
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jewish/arab [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 06:42 PM Flag
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Me: Korean, Dh: Lithuanian Jewish/ Russian [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 06:46 PM Flag
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Mississipian/Californian [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 09:21 PM Flag
[ - ] I'd like to start a Chinese (Mandarin) speaking playgroup for 4-6 year old girls on weekday afternoons on the Upper East Side. If anyone is interested, please post your info here (I will "watch" this post). We speak Mandarin with our daughter and our nanny does as well, but she is not exposed to other children that speak Chinese. Thanks! 6 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
Preschool/Kids 01.24.09, 11:16 AM Flag
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why only girls??? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 04:13 PM Flag
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because I have a girl [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.25.09, 01:29 PM Flag
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np: Your dd does not have friends who are boys? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.25.09, 01:54 PM Flag
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np. at this age dds socialize with dds and ds socialize with ds. plus, agree with poster below that 99% of the people interested in this sort of thing have a dd. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.25.09, 03:28 PM Flag
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Yeah, why not boys also? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 04:23 PM Flag
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because families who live on ues and have a dc who speaks mandarin adopted that dc from china and she is a girl. if you want ds to speak mandarin, try a daycare in chinatown. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 04:25 PM Flag
[ - ] What happens to Sept birthday kids? 3 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
NY Schools 01.24.09, 11:14 AM Flag
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What do you mean? If they want private they apply when the dc is five & they start k just before, or just after their sixth birthday - if they want public they start at four going on five. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 11:42 AM Flag
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great birthday to have IMO (signed mom of two August DSs) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 12:25 PM Flag
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Some stay back a year, some go ahead and are the youngest. There are some private schools with a later deadline like Oct. 1 or 15. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 03:00 PM Flag
[ - ] What happens to Sept birthday kids? 0 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
NY Schools 01.24.09, 11:14 AM Flag
[ - ] If you are a person of color applying to K for your dc,how concerned are you that if accepted, your dc will be the only child of color? Does this bother you? 11 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
NY Schools 01.24.09, 11:13 AM Flag
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Pretty concerned, but I was the only Black person in most of my classes most of my life and it was fine. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 11:19 AM Flag
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same situation here. both dh and i were one of the very few kids of color (and I'm including asian and latino in the number) in any of our classes, so while it's a bummer in many respects, we'll deal. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 04:30 PM Flag
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My dc's school is about 33% children of color - including blacks, Asians, Hispanics, mixed dc - and while it is not ideal they are making an effort & I think handle it well. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.25.09, 07:02 AM Flag
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Most of the schools we are applying to didn't seem like being the only "one" was likely, maybe one of few, but not only. Nevertheless, I would expect, and am prepared to discuss with the school if they don't get it, that they would/should try to group kids of color in classes so as to avoid being the only one. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 07:34 PM Flag
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yeah that will go over well with the school. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.25.09, 06:59 AM Flag
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Most schools do that [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.25.09, 07:04 AM Flag
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Dalton's K is half kids of color. I hope you applied there. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.25.09, 07:02 AM Flag
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That is actually not true - it is almost 40%, but that is good - doesn't mean that your dc can get in and chances are she/he will end up in a school where children of color are more like 25% [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.25.09, 07:03 AM Flag
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K is 48% kids of color. Not 40%. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.25.09, 07:16 AM Flag
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Also, other schools don't have kids of color at 25%. I've toured a lot of schools and no way that they have 25% visible diversity. I think that number includes all other diversity. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.25.09, 07:17 AM Flag
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Dc is in the 7th grade now. I wish I had searched out a more diverse school. She is a different race than her parents. I would have done it differently. I am white and never really realized what it means to walk out in the street or go into a store and be a minority race. It's been an excellent teacher for my husband and myself. BTW, I'm very happy we have a black president. My child was born in China. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.25.09, 07:05 AM Flag
[ - ] OK, need to rant about MIL who is staying with us fro 2 months. She's an old Chinese woman obsessed with food and cooking. First thing she does when arrives is rearrange all my kitchen cupboards, put in all her herbs and spices. Proceeds to cook dinner for us all every night. I should probabbly be grateful - dc's are 2.5yo and 7wo and she's here to help. But there's no consultation about what we eat or at what time - I really have to give up control, not just of my kitchen but of my and dcs' evenings. Plus of course I never see dh alone. I'm not finding this easy! 9 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
Newborn 01.24.09, 11:02 AM Flag
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I would let the cupboards go. As long as the food was healthy and the children and you eat it, I would give up the menu planning too. But, if either of the above don't work, it is easy to say - we, I, they don't care for xx - so let's not do that dish again. IF she does, then pop in there and fix something in addition. Have a plan and the supplies ready and waiting. Seeing dh alone - what? You have a built in babysitter. Tell dh it is a MUST that you and he get out of the house together once a week for privacy. A must! You don't have to spend money, you do have to get away (and don't spend the time talking about her either). And you are in control of dc's evenings - but, if they want to vary from routinge cause grandma is there, what is the real long term harm? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 11:05 AM Flag
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Adult women shoulnd't live in the same home. Two months is really long. Did you invite her for this long? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 11:10 AM Flag
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I know! The problem is she lives in Australia, so when she comes she really has to stay for a long time. Last time it was 3 months so I'm counting myself lucky. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 11:14 AM Flag
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Sounds like my mom. In Chinese culture (as well as many others!), food is love. She may just be overwhelming you with it, but I would just take it for what it is, since it is done with good intentions. ITA w/ above poster, and take advantage of the free built-in babysitting, and go out for non-Chinese food. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 11:14 AM Flag
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I wish I had someone to cook for me. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 11:15 AM Flag
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OP: You think that, but when it actually happens and it comes with all the typical MIL loving interference (endless questions like why isn't ds potty-trained, why did nanny take him out when it was cold outside, why does your cleaner come once a week not every 2 weeks) it drives you crazy! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 11:17 AM Flag
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np: I'm interested to know, wre you Chinese? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 11:21 AM Flag
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no - English. With a very non - interfering family and culture. I'm sure that's part of the problem! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 11:39 AM Flag
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ITA with this suggestion. Take advantage of the babysitting and go out to eat! Also, try inviting her out to dinner w/ family. you can frame it as showing her some of DC's favorite foods and restaurants. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 11:56 AM Flag
[ - ] We got a letter today from Friends Seminary thanking us for our visit to the school saying that they hoped we thought it was a good fit for our child. I haven't even sent them my thank you note yet. I am wondering, does this mean anything? I didn't get any letters from any of my other schools. Or is this a Friends Seminary thing? Did anyone else get one? 73 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
NY Schools 01.24.09, 11:01 AM Flag
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FAKE [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 11:02 AM Flag
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op: It totally is not fake, I swear. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 11:07 AM Flag
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then you are $$ or a celeb OR they are trying to do damage control from their klodish behavior over the last several admissions years [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 11:34 AM Flag
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op: we aren't $$ or celeb, I just dont get it [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 12:48 PM Flag
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That school is so FOS [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 11:02 AM Flag
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why? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 11:08 AM Flag
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they consistently over-enroll and are also notorious for giving amazing feedback to families and then WL them if a FC letter is not sent (this is even if a PSD tells harriet or whomeever that Friends is in the family's top 3) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 11:33 AM Flag
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yep. that was us last year. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 11:45 AM Flag
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School often do that - I don't think that is particular to friends - them make these decisions for a million reasons & unless they are point blank saying you are in & then changing it to a WL or reject I don't see how it is different from other schools? We got great feedback from a school last year & PSD told them it was in our top three & ended up getting rejected - - I didn't apply to friends so maybe there is something that I am not getting. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 11:53 AM Flag
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Friends was awful about it though. Then they had the balls to have this "meaningful" waitlist where people got a handwritten note at the bottom - only it seems like 20 families got it adn then there was also a plain olf waitlist. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 12:14 PM Flag
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Seemed like at least 20 families on UB alone [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.27.09, 03:52 PM Flag
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Ditto! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 12:13 PM Flag
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We got one too. I think they send TYs to everyone. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 12:23 PM Flag
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We didn't get one [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 12:45 PM Flag
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That is what I assumed. We got one also, but I don't imagine that it was personally written for us. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 05:55 PM Flag
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I got a TY letter after our visit -and it wasn't very nice, which confirmed our opinion that we didn't do that well in our process there. If you got a very nice letter, I'd take that as a good sign. ours said something like "thanks for visiting, your application is complete. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.25.09, 07:50 PM Flag
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Coach Dave wanted to go for drinks with DH [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 12:37 PM Flag
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Coach Dave is a moron [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 05:10 PM Flag
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Went to TT and Ivy so I'd watch yourself. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 05:51 PM Flag
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Dave says his dc are in public school [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 05:54 PM Flag
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and? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 05:55 PM Flag
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he is a moron, go figure [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 07:24 PM Flag
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We got a letter like that last year and go in! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 01:31 PM Flag
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It seems to me that they would only send such a letter to applicants they want to accept. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 04:19 PM Flag
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op: I hope thats what it means [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 04:21 PM Flag
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How long after your interview did you receive it? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 05:56 PM Flag
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1 week [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 06:25 PM Flag
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np: us within days [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 06:29 PM Flag
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what do you think this means? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 06:37 PM Flag
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I honestly don't know. We assumed it was customary. It was not particularly personal. Felt like a form letter, so if it was their way of letting us know, it wasn't particularly effective. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 06:42 PM Flag
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I think it is a form letter. Please don't read too much into it. (And I got a letter too!) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 06:43 PM Flag
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Maybe its not form letter and they sent them to people they intend to accept. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 06:47 PM Flag
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Everyone gets that letter after your visit. It is nice manners. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 04:42 PM Flag
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why didnt any of my schools do that? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 04:44 PM Flag
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Were "good fit for your child" the exact words? Somehow I doubt that. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 05:02 PM Flag
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NICOLE sends them. Harriet adn Coach dave are too stupid to do that [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 05:11 PM Flag
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We got one from Harriet this year. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 05:54 PM Flag
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We got one from Dave this year [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.25.09, 05:14 AM Flag
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Since they are not sending letters to everyone it is a good sign. They are letting you know they want you and probably expect you to do the same. I would send a first choice letter pronto if you want an accept from them. If not, then I guess w/l. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 05:59 PM Flag
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How do you write something like that? I thought it was forbidden. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 06:09 PM Flag
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It is not forbidden that you send. It is just that the schools can ask you to send. Friends is telling you they want your dc as a way around this. You have to tell them you want them to clinch deal. I would write- thank you for your kind note. DH and I also think that your school would be a good fit for dc. Friends is out fc and will accept a spot if it is offered. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 06:28 PM Flag
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How can you write this when you clearly don't really know? You have no idea why Friends sends out a ty letter. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 06:33 PM Flag
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op: Also, it would be a lie. While we liked Friends and would be happy there, it is not our first choice. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 06:35 PM Flag
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wake up people. you don't choose the school, they choose you. if you don't respond to positive feedback then you risk being shut out. you admitted that no other schools are sending info your way. it is the last week of January now. This is the week decisions are being made. Jump on it or forever hold your peace. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 06:40 PM Flag
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You sound like a nut. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 06:42 PM Flag
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and you are in denial. I am speaking from experience. If you are not connected- sib, leg, or $$, you are at high risk of shut out. If you want to be sure, ask your PSD to call, but I would take this is as positive feedback. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 06:48 PM Flag
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op: we have no PSD, coming from public school preK [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 06:50 PM Flag
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then it makes total sense then you got this letter. they have no other way to communicate with you. they are telling you they will accept dc. you need to tell them in clear communication that you will take the spot if offered. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 06:54 PM Flag
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what if i say, We loved the school, dc had a great time. we would be very happy to attend the school if admitted. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 07:14 PM Flag
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Another way you can get into a school is by having a really great kid, with high erb scores, good playdate etc. Then you do not necessarily have to be connected or rich. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.25.09, 06:17 AM Flag
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ok,but couldnt i just say we loved the school without implying the whole first choice thing [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 06:43 PM Flag
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Didn't you already write a thank you note after interview/playdate? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 06:44 PM Flag
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no not yet [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 06:45 PM Flag
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you should write an enthusiastic TY note. That's what we did (and would have done regardless of whether we received a note from them). [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 06:46 PM Flag
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no, you need to communicate clearly. this is what they are expecting to hear from you. if you sound ambivalent, they will give the spot to the responder who gushes. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 06:51 PM Flag
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ittta and if op does not send fc letter she will not get an offer at friends. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 06:46 PM Flag
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ok, maybe i am nuts, but this whole fc letter thing seems so "insider information". what if you just didnt know to do this and you followed the info from so ou didnt, how coud it be held against you [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 06:49 PM Flag
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sorry probem with my "l" on keyboard [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 06:49 PM Flag
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even if you didn't know, the fact that they are saying we love you means they expect you to respond in kind. and if you really loved the school you would, no matter what the rules were regarding fc letters, etc. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 06:52 PM Flag
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ok; the exact wording of the letter: It was a pleasure to meet with you during xxx's visit. I hope she had a nice time and that you left with a positive impression of the school. If you have any questions in the coming weeks,..... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 06:54 PM Flag
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we got exactly same...who did you interview with? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 07:00 PM Flag
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so it is a form letter....i wish i knew if some people DIDNT get it [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 07:02 PM Flag
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Do you have a PSD? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 07:04 PM Flag
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what are you doing about it? anything? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 07:15 PM Flag
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op: Dave [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 08:36 PM Flag
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Positive impression does not equal good fit. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.25.09, 01:18 PM Flag
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how long have you been in new york? this is a competitive process. you have to educate yourself and those that don't lose out. How can it be held against you? Because life is not fair. They are more worried about yield then they are about following rules. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 06:58 PM Flag
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Last year, we interviewed with Coach Dave and definitely didn't get a letter. I think I remember hearing from other people on UB that it's just Nicole who sends them. So, if you interviewed with Nicole, you may not want to read too much into it. If it's Coach Dave who you interviewed with, then I'd think it probably means something unless they've changed their protocol since last year. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 07:56 PM Flag
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op: interesting, I interviewed with Dave [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 08:36 PM Flag
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We also interviewed with David and got a letter with the same wording a few days later. He's well mannered, that's all. I wouldn't read anything else into it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.25.09, 05:17 AM Flag
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Mr. Leiber sent my 5th grader a very similar letter. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 08:44 PM Flag
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I wouldn't read a lot into this. It sounds like a form letter to me from what you wrote above. They didn't say anything particularly personal. If they had actually said we hope we are a good fit for your DC, then that might mean something. We are applying to MS & have received a letter like this from every school we've applied to except one. I think it's just normal operating procedure. One school called us afterwards & asked us if we would like tickets to see their school musical & I took that to be a positive sign tho' maybe not but o/w I'm not reading much into admissions gushes. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 08:46 PM Flag
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i will just write a nice ty note, and try not to drive myself crazy [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 08:56 PM Flag
[ - ] I am so depressed...I am losing my hair like crazy. It is coming our in clumps...not sure why--may stress--any suggestions what to do? TIA 4 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 10:22 AM Flag
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did you just have a baby a few months ago? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 10:30 AM Flag
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no [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 10:43 AM Flag
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Get a physical, check your thyroid, do you wear your hair in a ponytail every day? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 10:45 AM Flag
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Beautiful hair was my "trademark" and at age 30 it fell out in clumps to the point that I had bald spots. I had a lot of stress that apparently compromised my immune system. I went on a macrobiotic (vegan) diet to help my immune system. Hair grew back thick and beautiful. I'm back to being a carnivore and hair is fine. Hair loss like you describe could be temporary like mine, or the sign of something else so see a doctor. GL. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 06:00 PM Flag
[ - ] Can anyone recommend a nutritionist on the east side? TIA 1 Reply [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 10:18 AM Flag
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Elyse Sosin - elysenutrition@yahoo.com, went to her to help w/ weight loss. she also does a lot of eating disorders [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 11:38 AM Flag
[ - ] Can $5-7K/month get my husband, 6 month old and I a 3 bdrm, 2 bath in a nice area in Manhattan? Also, any advice on childcare? We use a nanny in SF right now, but open to daycare as well. 3 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 10:09 AM Flag
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yes. but you should think about doorman bldg in a less nice neighborhood like midtown or hells kitchen vs. non doorman on UES or UWS. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 11:43 AM Flag
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No. And why would you need a 3 bedroom anyway? Most people I know with TWO children don't even live in a 3 bedroom! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 12:19 PM Flag
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Rents are really coming down now in general. I have to move, but still have time on my lease. I live in a doorman bldg, 3 bedroom, 2.5 bath on the UES (70s off 3rd) - great location with convenient grocery, shops and transportation. If you're interested, you can email me privately at twillcall7@yahoo.com Good Luck. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 02:16 PM Flag
[ - ] In the end only applied to four preschools. We had two playdates. One he was great, one not so good. Too few schools? I just can't imagine sending him to someplace I just didn't love. Especially for the amount of money they cost. 1 Reply [ Reply | Watch | More ]
Preschool/Kids 01.24.09, 10:01 AM Flag
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We are in the same situation. We only applied to 4 places, we liked 2, weren't impressed by the other 2, all playdates went well except one at the school we werent impressed about. And yet I think that school is the one we will get into. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 11:07 AM Flag
[ - ] Have any first time applicants heard from a private school yet? In or out? 5 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
Preschool/Kids 01.24.09, 09:50 AM Flag
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helllllo.... 3 more weeks [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 10:00 AM Flag
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yes, 2 in [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 10:04 AM Flag
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1 admit. 2 w/ls. psd seems not to want to try for feedback elsewhere. its OK. admit is in top 3. but can't help but wonder. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 10:34 AM Flag
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well they must all be Parochial schools then b/c everyone else sends letters out 3 weeks from now [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 11:03 AM Flag
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parochial hasn't even started yet, with the exception of St. Ignatius early decision. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 12:36 PM Flag
[ - ] father offered repeatedly to lend us money (we never asked). finally, we said we would love to take him up on the offer. he said no. wwyd? none of his financial circumstances changed that would have changed his position. truly he was just being an ass. 2 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 09:41 AM Flag
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EVERYONE's financial circumstances have changed somewhat inside the last several months. Your dad's included (unless his dough is in his mattress). [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 10:03 AM Flag
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What do you mean wwyd? Shoot him? Steal the money? There is nothing you can do except carry on and never ask for money again. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 10:35 AM Flag
[ - ] Our dd goes to Brearley and we live on the upper upper east side (120's) and we don't get downtown much anymore. Went to a Karamu celebration at Little Red with some out of town friends (their niece goes there) and was blown away-- SO fun, festive and diverse--it really felt like the school community was coming together and it was such a great mix of people. We have NOTHING like that at Brearley--it made me feel sad. My daughter drummed with a Japanese band and jumped rope with the world champion double dutch team. Is the school as great as it seemed? 31 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 09:27 AM Flag
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damn. Sounds great. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 09:37 AM Flag
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Thanks for being honest. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 09:37 AM Flag
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We are at Brearley and very happy-- we don't look to our school for this kind of thing [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 09:44 AM Flag
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ew. sad. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 09:45 AM Flag
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I know. Brearley parent body mostly seemed obsessed with exmissions and have no regard for anything else. It was a big turnoff for us. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 10:04 AM Flag
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np: typical UB post. CLearly you know nothing about the school. Signed, Brearley mother and alumna who looked long and hard at downtown and more progressive schools. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 05:16 PM Flag
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Not true. I know several people (parents, teachers) at Brearley. I think it used to be a very diff school/diff crowd a decade ago but the school has changed. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.25.09, 02:13 PM Flag
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Yes but your dd is learning so much more than those LREI kids [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 10:01 AM Flag
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and less aware of anyone else or things that matter in life/world. Brearley girls have major attitude problems. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 10:07 AM Flag
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ITA. The girl who went to Brearley from my dc's preschool was a major brat with parlor trick parents who loved to quiz the kid in LOUD VOICES for all to hear. And, no, I'm not jealous; my kid's erb was higher than hers (only know that because the mom ran around bragging about that, too). [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 10:11 AM Flag
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sounds like they really got your competitve juices flowing! brearley thought the kid was smart too. calling it parlor tricks betrays how much it all got to you. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 10:35 AM Flag
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LOL. No, they were parlor tricks. Very much like Alex and Simon in RHONY--only worse. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 10:46 AM Flag
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well, apparently she has more going on than that since Brearley accepted [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 02:02 PM Flag
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International [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 06:57 PM Flag
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and LREI would be a majot waste of money-teachers looked like crackheads [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 02:13 PM Flag
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we wonder about this very thing. Who knows what our options wil be, but we like both B and LREI for very different reasons. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 12:40 PM Flag
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My LREI kid loves school and is genuinely compassionate and concerned about her community. She took the ERBs last year (LREI administers them in 4th grade--) and her scores were very high. She LOVES to read and reads at a HS level. The school is able to handle both her strengths and weaknesses and she is thriving and never bored. I honestly don't understand why Brearley parents always put LREI down-- I work with a woman with a dd at Brearley -- she is so invested in her school being the "best" and she doesn't miss an opportunity to tell me how weak LREI is academically. Why do B parents care so much??? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 01:14 PM Flag
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np--OP is not putting down Little Red at all. Why don't you recognize the nice things she is saying about your child's school? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 01:41 PM Flag
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I don't think the poster meant the OP-- I think she meant some subsequent posts. But I gotta say-- my daughter is at VCS and it is true some Brearley parents can be vicious! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 02:18 PM Flag
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I know!! We're at Friends and my dd's best friiend is at Brearley--- they are so MEAN about it!! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 02:29 PM Flag
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There is no post above from a Brearley parent putting down Little Red. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 04:01 PM Flag
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There are people posting that kids at B learn alot more then kids at LREI... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 05:14 PM Flag
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And I am sorry to say it is probably true. I used to be a teacher there and is a lovely school, but academics are not top notch. I think is especially lacking for a very bright child. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 05:59 PM Flag
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My combined and extended family has alot of experience at a variety of NYC private schools--including Little Red and Brearley. My super smart nephew was at LREI and is in his last year at Yale now-- it was NOT lacking for that bright child! My older daughter loved Brearley but her younger sister hated it (and moved last year to LaGuardia) and would have had a much better academic experience at LREI. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 06:13 PM Flag
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It sounds like your nephew has done well. I still think the curriculum is weak in some areas. Also, typically there are only one maybe two really bright kids in a class of say 18-20 kids. I think kids need to be challenged by their peers, and have heard many LREI parents of very able kids complain about this. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 06:30 PM Flag
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Maybe disturbing to private parents. My DD reads at HS level too (3rd grader) and she is in public general education. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 02:15 PM Flag
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It's not at all disturbing. I'm aware that there are kids learning to read everywhere in the world. My dd is not in private so she can be the only one who reads at advanced level, it's other things. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 03:53 PM Flag
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That just means she's a smart kid. What does that have to do with anything? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 06:07 PM Flag
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B parents dpon't care so much. It's the parents of kids at schools with inferiority complexes that care so much. My kids are at ECFS but I see this all the time, particularly aimed at Brearley and Collegiate. They're top notch schools academically and otherwise. Whay does that bug you? Your kid can go to Harvard too. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 05:18 PM Flag
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Well, you as per your own admission, you don't get downtown much and now you obviously see why you should. Be grateful for the education that your child is getting and recognize that school--no matter how great, can't be all things to you. Don't be sad; do your job and get out and expose your child to all the wonderful diversity that a great city like this has to offer. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 07:20 PM Flag
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The Brearley i went to in the 70's and 80's was a much different place-- far more community minded and concerned with social justice. Its true that now there is little in the way of celebrating diversity... but if that matters to you, speak up! Start a committee. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.25.09, 08:36 AM Flag
[ - ] wwyd? dc is happy and fine at a pretty good public school for K, and we just got word from a private school we'd applied to last year that they might have spot for 1st next year. we really liked that private school (was FC and we kept in contact w/ AD after being on wait list), but now dc is happy in the current situation, and we feel it's a good school. changing schools might be disruptive (dc went to 2 different preschools, btw...now very happily adjusted to new school, and i kinda hate to change again.) not sure how to decide this. any thoughts? 16 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
NY Schools 01.24.09, 09:19 AM Flag
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at this age, dc will survive switching schools just fine. it really comes down to which school you like better and, if private, whether you think it's worth the money. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 09:21 AM Flag
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WTF!? Did you call the school that WL you last year to say you were still in the game? Didn't they make you redo the ERB and so on? I think your post is FAKE [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 10:02 AM Flag
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ITA. Fake. The wls close once K starts. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 10:05 AM Flag
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from op: not fake. why would someone bother to write a fake post like this? looking for objective advice. they didn't ask for new ERB. i called in sept and they asked if we wanted to roll over application to 1st grade. they've asked for new interview (yet to have) and teacher evaluation. dc happily settled into current school, just confused now about what to do. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 12:58 PM Flag
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NAME THE SCHOOL THEN. Many of us were SO after rotting on never ,moving WL's last year so name the school. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 05:14 PM Flag
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np: I am guessing a progressive that does not require erb like MCS or Bank St. Both DOAs there are accesible and encourage you stay in touch with them. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 06:07 PM Flag
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could be packer - they don't require erb for reapp in 1st [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 07:02 PM Flag
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My dd spent K in public and then moved to private for 1st. I would go private if you can swing it. I don't want to offend any public school moms, but I personally see great differences. The learning is deeper, the community is more thoughtful and my dd is getting a different childhood from the one she would have if we stayed in public. I know many people would not agree, so I'm just telling you my experience. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 04:01 PM Flag
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this is total crap--the private school is for YOU. the "learning" is not "deeper" [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 05:21 PM Flag
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np--The curriculum in many private schools is deeper than that of most NYC public schools--especially in history, science, grammar, writing, vocabulary, foreign language, computer instruction. (An example: my dd was taught ways to evaluate the credibility of websites as sources of information in 5th grade.) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 05:35 PM Flag
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It is deeper. I've been in both with my child and there is depth that was not there in public. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 05:45 PM Flag
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we are in private -know the publics -and you are full of it [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 05:52 PM Flag
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But I didn't just know the publics I was in both with my dd. I understood the mandates and the testing. I guess you did not and don't feel the difference, but I am sure there is a difference in both. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 06:06 PM Flag
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Unless the public school is SO bad that your DC's personal safety is in jeopardy, private just isn't worth it, despite the brainwashing that goes on over this board. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 05:47 PM Flag
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think long-term. what is 4th and 5th grade like at your ps? what is the plan for ms? if these answers are not solid, then go for private. The differences become apparent in the later grades. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 06:06 PM Flag
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Here is the thing - you'll have to change him after 5th anyway - it might be better to go private where it at least goes up to 8. Kids do adjust. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 01.24.09, 07:03 PM Flag
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