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[ - ] i deal age for a dollhouse. 2 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:09 AM Flag
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It depends on the kid, the dollhouse, and other factors. I got my DD a Calico Critters dollhouse when she was 4. It's really a fabulous dollhouse, with very cute animal dolls and everything in perfectly proportioned teeny shapes. Too teeny for a 4-year-old, though, and too teeny for my house which doesn't have a special table where the dollhouse could live. Much to my chagrin, I put it away. She and her sister pull it out about once a year, and lose more of the teeny pieces. Sigh. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:26 AM Flag
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When she wants one. I had my father build me a huge doll house when I was three and my sister and I played with it until I was about 13 (maybe a bit too long). To this day it is the best gift I have ever received from my father. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:32 AM Flag
[ - ] Need a "I'm going to be a big brother" tee to spread our good news! Any recs for stores that sell cute ones? 4 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:07 AM Flag
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I had one made up online (that's how we told my fam) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:09 AM Flag
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sounds like something they would have at Buy BUy Baby [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:16 AM Flag
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I don't have any recs, but I want to give you props on a really creative idea for letting the family know about the pregnancy! Love it! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:17 AM Flag
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how far along are you ? I personally would hate to jinx it by getting something so tangible. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 12:35 PM Flag
[ - ] Chapin, Horace Mann or Trinity? (we are sibs at one of them, btw) 4 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
New York City 09.12.08, 11:04 AM Flag
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Zzzzzzzzzzz [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:38 AM Flag
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chapin [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 12:18 PM Flag
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wherever you have a sib. duh. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 05:31 PM Flag
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Chapin, or Trinity, but if the sib is at HM then go for that. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 05:34 PM Flag
[ - ] Our 5th grader loves our zoned public. Despite the 30+ DCs in the class, she says that class size has not affected her learning (she got 4s in both ELA & Math and she's reading t 7th grade level) 25 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
New York City 09.12.08, 11:03 AM Flag
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Thank you for posting. As a child, 30 dc and 1 teacher didn't get in my way either. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:04 AM Flag
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MIL taught first grade in England, with 40 kids in the class. She doesn't understand all my angst about class size. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 04:15 PM Flag
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My 1st-grader seems fine with 26. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:05 AM Flag
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mine was fine with 28. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:06 AM Flag
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All research shows that class-size (with 30+ as maximum) does not affect the learning or NORMAL kids. Obviously for kids with sensory or ADD or other mental issues a "nurturing" private might be best [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:07 AM Flag
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^^^learning of [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:07 AM Flag
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duck...incoming [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:08 AM Flag
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np, people can rant a rave about class size all they want, doesn't change the fact that what the above responder says is true. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:09 AM Flag
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regardless, among the school-related reasons people pay $$$ for private or to move to the burbs is because of class size. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:30 AM Flag
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was going to say the same, teacher matters, class size not so much [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:08 AM Flag
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I'd say "peer group" matters the most, teacher next [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:10 AM Flag
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studies say teacher. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:13 AM Flag
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That's a circular reasoning between input/output. If you look for things that are quantifiable across teachers ex-ante like "Degree", "years of experience", etc. These things don't matter [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:19 AM Flag
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I'm sort of getting the feeling you want to argue and I don't. Teacher matters. Degree, no, Teacher - the person, the skill. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:23 AM Flag
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That's crap. Smart kids getting even more individualized time do even better [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:28 AM Flag
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Most research says you're wrong. Why don't your read before talking from your ass [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 12:50 PM Flag
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wow defensive. All I know if our public school is crappy [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 05:20 PM Flag
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Not ALL the research shows this. There is a lot of conflicting research & many factors, not just LDs, that make class size matter. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 05:24 PM Flag
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Same w/ my dd. I have to admit that it does depend on the child. I have just been lucky to have very self-motivated and organized kids, FWIW. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:11 AM Flag
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you got lucky [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:32 AM Flag
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How's her writing and spelling? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 05:53 PM Flag
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^^^ and grammar. I ask this because I believe teaching writing well requires a small class size. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 05:55 PM Flag
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Excellent...but to be honest we enrich in the areas of Vocabulary and Spelling [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 06:58 PM Flag
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that's great. stories like yours make me happy we chose our gen ed over a g&t. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 07:09 PM Flag
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good. never bothered me either. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 07:30 PM Flag
[ - ] Which schools on my list have more significant Christian populations? Spence, Chapin, Nightingale, Hewitt, Birch Wathen, Trevor, Trinity, Town? 11 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
New York City 09.12.08, 11:01 AM Flag
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Why? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:24 AM Flag
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"Christian" is a big category. Do you mean Protestant? Regular churchgoers? Or just gentiles? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:27 AM Flag
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Not Hewitt and not Town. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:51 AM Flag
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Are you reacting to the question about Jewish populations at those schools? I thought that was a valid question - and I think this is a valid question. To answer it: all of those schools except possibly Town and/or Hewitt have significant Christian populations. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 12:41 PM Flag
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lol! Does anyone else think this question is a bit funny? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 12:42 PM Flag
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well.. yeah - i mean - are you looking for christians? or looking to avoid them? or looking for some other population? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 12:44 PM Flag
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I think she is looking FOR Christians, but that is just my take on it, could be wrong [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 12:45 PM Flag
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OP: It was a reaction to an identically phrased Question about "Jewish population". It was meant as a joke [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 12:46 PM Flag
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Ah....didn't know that..thanks for the heads up...feel kind of stupid now... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 12:50 PM Flag
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um -- all of them. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.17.08, 10:00 AM Flag
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I guess it depends what you mean by significant. They are all at least 30% christian, and some are more like 80%, so I would say all have a significant Christian population. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.17.08, 10:10 AM Flag
[ - ] does anyone know of any good public speaking classes or groups? 5 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 10:58 AM Flag
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Toastmasters, ASTD alsways has great courses for presentation skills, what is it you are looking for? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:00 AM Flag
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looking for more opportunities to cure/reduce my anxieties. what's ASTD? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:04 AM Flag
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It is a great resource for training professionals. it is ASTD.org, you may also want to check out some of AMA's courses (American Management Association) they are great. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:09 AM Flag
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thanks will do. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:11 AM Flag
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no problem it is what i do for a living. if you have any other q's let me know. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:12 AM Flag
[ - ] I just got a cut, color and highlights and bill came to $270. Want to make sure I tipped correctly. She worked on me for 3.5 hours. What would you tip? Thx! 12 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 10:56 AM Flag
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20.00 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 10:57 AM Flag
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40 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 10:57 AM Flag
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ita with 40 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:01 AM Flag
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20%, $57 if you liked it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:02 AM Flag
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50 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:02 AM Flag
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WOw! Where do you live? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:04 AM Flag
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nyc [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:09 AM Flag
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op: this is what i tipped... and wasn't sure if i over-tipped. i'm usually generous, but not that generous. my first time there, btw. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:04 AM Flag
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20% is the correct amount. I hope you look fabulous! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:28 AM Flag
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I would have tipped that as well. I'm notoriously frugal except when it comes to tipping the person that does my hair [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:29 AM Flag
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40 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:05 AM Flag
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$50- that's 20% [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:10 AM Flag
[ - ] Recommendations for toddler booster car seat? we're looking for something safe, light, easy to install, and airplane safe. baby is 22 pounds. thanks! 1 Reply [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 10:52 AM Flag
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we bought the Graco Cargo 5 yrs ago...super light...but I'm not sure the design would be the same nowadays...they all seem to have big fat heavy bases on them now. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:01 AM Flag
[ - ] So correct me if I'm wrong. According to Palin, there is a chance we will soon be at war with Iran and Russia. Who will it be after that? 9 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
News 09.12.08, 10:52 AM Flag
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i'd also like to know where we are getting the troops for all this, absent a draft. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 10:54 AM Flag
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interesting - my ds just turned 12 and it is only 5 years till 18. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 10:55 AM Flag
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mine is seven adn i'm considering starting to go to Quaker meeting. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:00 AM Flag
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I wonder if parents did that for the world wars? Probably not! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:03 AM Flag
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people sure did for Nam. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:06 AM Flag
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Curious, do you think it is right for Iran and Russia to put sanctions on oil? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:07 AM Flag
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Obama wants Pakistan and Afghanistan. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 03:07 PM Flag
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you have got to be kidding me!! the draft issue again? are you really THAT desperate. oh yeah, you've seen the polls. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 03:09 PM Flag
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I think she may have been thinking about the Bush Doctrine without actually thinking about it as she does not know what it is ! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 03:12 PM Flag
[ - ] i was in line at the baby gap with my 2 year old waiting for about 10 minutes - finally we were the next up. My dd is starting to get antsy. For her 10 minutes must be forever. This woman comes up to me with a bunch of stuff telling me that her kid gets out of school soon so she wants to get infront of me. I told her no and to ask someone else. She told me that I didn't have to be snooty. I really don't think I was. I was really polite. Granted I was thinking - if you need to be at your kids school why are you shopping and then expecting to jump infront of everyone in the line? i think if i had been by myself i would have considered it, but since i was with my daughter who was getting antsy it wasn't a possiblity. the woman behind me let her get infront of her. i still don't understand though why someone would come into a store knowing full well that they needed to go pick up there kid soon, and then think they were entitled to jump the queue when everyone else had patiently been waiting for 10 minutes. 41 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 10:51 AM Flag
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because some people have an unbelievable sense of entitlement. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 10:53 AM Flag
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I would have said, I'm sorry, I'm on a schedule too. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 10:53 AM Flag
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I'm sure you were polite. Obviously, she's the one with bad manners. What a beeyotch. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 10:54 AM Flag
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she's a beeyotch because she asked?? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 10:58 AM Flag
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No, because she called her snooty for not letting her cut in. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:01 AM Flag
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because the obviously the lady was bitch that said no. duh! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:02 AM Flag
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I didn't get that from her post at all. Did you happen to be at Baby Gap today trying to cut into a line? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:03 AM Flag
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lol [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:07 AM Flag
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wow....let the lady through. I would want somebody to do that for me if I was in a rush. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 10:56 AM Flag
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why should someone else be inconvenienced as a result of your bad planning? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 10:58 AM Flag
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oh so your never in a rush? come on....Im just saying you don't know what her back story is for the day. If it was me I would've played with my 2yo in line for another 3 min. haha....some people are so uptight. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:00 AM Flag
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And you don't know if OP is risking a full tantrum-y melt-down in a store? Kids can be unpredictable. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:02 AM Flag
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and so what if she does? what's the big deal...are you kidding me...we are talking a difference of 2 min...not a half an hour [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:04 AM Flag
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I think you're the (obviously intelligent) "duh" responder earlier in the thread, and I would bet $$ that you're the one who asked to cut in line today. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:06 AM Flag
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I just hope your never in a rush and need help. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:10 AM Flag
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please. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:11 AM Flag
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I have been and have asked, but would never presume that my needs supercedes someone else's. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:13 AM Flag
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of course I'm sometimes in a rush, but I would never ask anyone to let me jump the line as a result. it's unbelievably selfish and as pointed out earlier in the thread, anyone who would ask evidently has a grand sense of entitlement--i.e., your time is obviously so much more important than anyone else's. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:02 AM Flag
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its sad that you really think that way. people can't just be nice and help out another mother that is trying to beat the clock? seriously [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:05 AM Flag
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seriously. that may be sad for you perhaps, but I believe in personal responsibility. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:07 AM Flag
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np: that other mom needs to be more responsible with her time. We all have kids to pick up in school but if it means the shopping will make you late then you just don't do it [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:08 AM Flag
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I'm in a rush if something unexpected comes up so going shopping doesn't cut it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:26 AM Flag
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ITA. Isn't every mom in a rush (even if it is just to get your two year old out of the store before she loses it). [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:03 AM Flag
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Hey I've been there..in a rush and had to pick the kids up. If I was running late, I leave the damn clothes but would NEVER expect someone to allow me to cut and be pissed if someone said no [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:07 AM Flag
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bingo [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:09 AM Flag
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sounds like she has a huge sense of entitlement...yuck! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:03 AM Flag
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I think you should've let her go. I would have. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:07 AM Flag
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np: if she didn't have her dc with her I would agree with you..but with a dc that already waited 10 min and is getting antsy...hell no. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:09 AM Flag
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Shopping isn't an emergency. She should have asked the cashiers to hold it behind the counter till she came back or put the stuff back. There are other situations where I might have said sure, even if I was with dc, but that's not one of them. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:10 AM Flag
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another good point. there's one poster here who is vigorously defending the woman who asked the "favor" and I bet it's because she's defending herself. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:13 AM Flag
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Im not defending myself. I personally probably would not have asked if it wasn't an emergency. Im just saying I don't think I could turn down another mother that obviously asked for help is all. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:16 AM Flag
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I couldn't turn down a mother who asked for help because her dc was having a medical or other emergency--I will turn down a mother who asks for help because she didn't plan her afternoon and was in a rush because she was shopping. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:19 AM Flag
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np: being a mom doesn't change people's personalities. I'm sure that woman would have asked if she was late for any appointment. I regularly offer to watch my friend's kids, pick up things for other busy moms, etc., so I agree with helping fellow parents, but I think this mom was pretty oblivious OP's dc. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:20 AM Flag
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yes but if you had a small issue starting like a antsy 2yr old, you would need to get out ASAP yourself [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:22 AM Flag
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Same situation happened to me last week and I had my 3yo. I let the women go ahead of me because I was not in a rush. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:12 AM Flag
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good for you, Mother Teresa. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:13 AM Flag
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I can't believe she had the nerve to ask. If she'd been buying a single item at the grocery store I could see it - she may really need that milk. But clothes from Baby Gap? No way is that a "must have in the next 10 min" situation. She was definitely in the wrong. And while I don't think it would have killed you to be in line an extra five minutes I support you saying no b/c that woman needed to hear it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:28 AM Flag
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ITA. To me, "helping another mom" means holding the door for her stroller, letting her get on the subway elevator first, or letting her kid into the bathroom before yours if he/she obviously needs to go worse. It's not a "go to the head of the line" pass at The Gap! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:32 AM Flag
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OP- that I agree with - maybe if I was at the store - because maybe she was out of something and needed to get it for her kid for snack time. But seriously an armload of socks and a few other items? I was with my kid and we had been waiting patiently and waiting like everyone else to buy our things and get out (and mind you for about the ten people in front of me only 2 peopple were working, it wasn't until right after i got up to pay that they finally added two more people to help). Also if I was buy myself I probably would have considered letting her go. But at the same time that is saying that the woman who is buying an armload of socks and probably should go pick up her kid and then come back - her time is more valuable then mine, or even the person without kids and that's not fair. i'm all for helping but what made her mismanagement of time more valuable than mine? i wanted to get my daughter out of there and have lunch (it was 12) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:40 AM Flag
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sorry ignore my spelling - i was up until 1am waiting to hear if my husband's delayed flight got out [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:49 AM Flag
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np: OP, I am with you. If a mom asked to jump in line at the drugstore (holding a bottle of Infant Tylenol) I would say, by all means, but she'd obv. been browsing at the Gap for clothing and didn't budget time well. That's really not your fault, I have had those moments myself -- either you have the stuff held, run late to your next appt., or put it back and return another day. She was rude to ask you but even ruder to be unkind when you explained nicely why not. She sounds entitled!!! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 01:53 PM Flag
[ - ] Older DC just started K, younger DC just started preschool, and the logistics of it all are very challenging. DH and I work FT and have a nanny, but getting everyone where they need to be is complicated. Does it get easier? 5 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
NY Schools 09.12.08, 10:50 AM Flag
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only for the brief time both children are at the same school. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 10:51 AM Flag
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no, not as long as they are in two different schools on two different schedules. I'm a sahm with a ft nanny (3 kids) and it is a huge PITA [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 10:55 AM Flag
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^doing it all on public transportation or praying we get a cab is the biggest reason we left for the burbs after 2 yrs of this hassle. It's a bit easier here because we don't have to rely on someone else for transportation [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 10:57 AM Flag
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How far apart are the schools? What times do they have to be there (or get picked up)? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:04 AM Flag
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They are 50 blocks apart. Pickup times diverge enough, and the older one takes the bus (or will starting next week once orientation is over), but there are so many logistical issues with their activities, playdates, etc. - I feel like it's challenging just to know where both of them are at any given moment and how they will be getting home from there. The playdate aspect is especially difficult. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:56 AM Flag
[ - ] Why is there so much hostility on this board to the idea that gifted kids (esp. boys) often have behavioural problems? 46 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
NY Schools 09.12.08, 10:50 AM Flag
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Because most people who say things like that are using "giftedness" as an excuse for bad behavior that is mostly the result of lazy or shoddy parenting. (Signed, mom who was "gifted" as a child and has a "gifted" kid who has plenty of friends and no behavioral issues.) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 10:51 AM Flag
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Great parents sometimes have poorly behaved children. As a matter of fact, most of the families I know with two or three children have one that is poorly behaved (mine growing up included) - same parents - different children. This, lazy or shoddy parent blame baffles me [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 10:54 AM Flag
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I am the OP, I have 2 children-- one with behavior problems and one very docile and obedient. The challenging child tested gifted, the other is still little but seems less intense to me by far. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 10:57 AM Flag
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^^ it seems clear to me that there's often (not always) a correlation between giftedness and behavior, but when anyone mentions it here they get eaten alive, which just seems a little strange to me. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 10:58 AM Flag
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so don't mention it here. the definition of insanity is doing the same behavoir and expecting a different result. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:00 AM Flag
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OK, whatever, it just seems odd because people are otherwise obsessed with all aspects of giftedness here. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:03 AM Flag
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Ooh, snotty. There's nurture and nature involved. Sometimes nature wins out. (From a mom of a nongifted ds who is great in school but acts out like crazy at home.) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:24 AM Flag
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are you starting a new post in response to something said today? or just stirring the pot for fun? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 10:52 AM Flag
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started the post because it's on my mind... my own ds took all the tests a few years ago for K and tested very very high, he has real behavior problems that I've always attributed to the giftedness, frankly (overexictabilities)...but I am beginning to wonder when I am going to ask myself if something is really wrong with him. Sometimes it's like walking down the street with a crazy person (lost in his own fantasy world). He is 6. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 10:55 AM Flag
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Then don't post on UB. Just google, you will find many more supportive sites for gifted children, their parents and their struggles. Good luck, it is a tough exhausting road. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 10:58 AM Flag
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thanks, I just find this particular hostility curious. Also, I am beginning to doubt whether the giftedness is the direct cause of the behavior problems (though I know they are related)... frankly, he's not even doing that hot in school. Trying to figure out how to get him analyzed. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:01 AM Flag
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What do you mean by analyzed? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:02 AM Flag
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I mean, looked at by a therapist who knows about these things and can tell me if he's ADHD or will grow out of it or whatever. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:04 AM Flag
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I would be VERY careful with this. Your son is only six. Wait until third grade to see how things are going. Very rarely do you put a child under a microscope and not find a problem and once that ball starts rolling, you can't stop it. If your mommy phone is ringing off the hook that something IS wrong with your dc (which it doesn't sound to me to be the case) then if you can afford it, seek a private evaluation not at NYU. But, again, I would advise that you wait and see. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:06 AM Flag
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thanks, that's always been my gut feeling... it's just that nothing seems to help with him, he literally does not learn from his mistakes, and I am getting very exhausted and feel like I could use some help. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:08 AM Flag
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It will get better. Let's get a little perspective ok? How many times have you told him to chew with his mouth closed? If that were a hot button issue (like school) you would say "He just doesn't learn from his mistakes. I've told him over and over and he keeps making noise when he chews". But because that is just a little thing that doesn't embarrass you or push a button, you calmly tell him over and over. It's the same with ALL of the lessons. Just keep your calm. And say to yourself, high intellect is a blessing. It will serve him well. This is first grade. It is a marathon, not a sprint. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:12 AM Flag
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I've BTDT. Gifted ds, similar behavior to what you describe. Do NOT wait. He may benefit from some OT for attentiveness, sensory or self-regulation issues. Most of a child's neurological pathways are established by the time they hit 7. Work done now could have more impact than remedial modifications handled later (i.e. 3rd grade.) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:15 AM Flag
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2 directly opposite arguments that both sound reasonable... sounds like the war going on in my head. sigh [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:19 AM Flag
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That is when you have to quiet your mind, think about all you've read and learned and been told and let your mommy head tell you. Just ask yourself. Do you think there is something wrong with your child - either an LD or a mental illness, or do you think your child has difficulty solely because of IQ. Our house has one answer, the other posters house has another and you will find your answer. You will. Parenting is hard. Good luck [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:21 AM Flag
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or the child could be just fine without any neurological problems and mature by third grade. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:19 AM Flag
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I have a ds that is just like yours. We should start a support group (play group would be too crazy)! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:02 AM Flag
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np, I've got one too! That makes three of us [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:03 AM Flag
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it really is exhausting, sometimes I feel like giving up. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:05 AM Flag
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Ditto here. We even schlepped him around for a bunch of evaluations believing there was something wrong with him. Everything came back negative. High IQ sometimes equals heightened sensitivities, asynchronous development, etc. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:08 AM Flag
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really, no one tried to tell you he was ADHD or anything? What kind of evaluations did you have? Because this is just what I've been considering (see above)... Please tell me more about your experience. Thanks [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:16 AM Flag
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They won't give a dx of ADHD until 6 yo (he's 5 yo), but he has some, but not all symptoms. He is actually very focused and can sit still for a long time. I've posted earlier, but he does have problems with personal space and being impulsive. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:21 AM Flag
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you must not live in nyc. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:24 AM Flag
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who did you use for your evaluation? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:38 AM Flag
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me too. But I just keep reading and keep finding support from other caring kind people. Hang in there. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:08 AM Flag
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thanks, at what age do you think it will get better? My dh says 8 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:09 AM Flag
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Personally, I think 9 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:15 AM Flag
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because often that's an excuse. your kid is acting up but nobody shoudl complain b/c he is gifted. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 10:53 AM Flag
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because... often times the children are not gifted and instead parents are looking to justify their poor parenting. This is obviously not always the case, but parents and teachers alike are getting sick of people claiming that their spoiled/emotionally neglected children are behaving the way they do because of their extraordinary intelligence. It's interesting that typically it is only middle and/or upper class families who have children with behavior problems caused by their superior intellect; whereas if the families are poor, no one thinks the child is acting out because he may be more intelligent than the rest of the children his age. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:09 AM Flag
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excellent point. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:14 AM Flag
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The latter part of your post isn't interesting to me. It is incredibly sad. An AA male in a poor nabe who is gifted is screwed and often labled a behavoir problem. Often misdx with ADHD, and has a drop out rate higher than children who are not gifted. It stinks. And as other poster said, blaiming parents is just plain dumb. Why people have this need is beyond me. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:17 AM Flag
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but you do concede that the underlying behavioral peculiarities are the same, just interpreted differently [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:24 AM Flag
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Maybe I worded it wrong when I said that it was "interesting" that the behavioral issues of children in upper and middle class families are usually viewed differently. The above poster stated my opinion better with the word "sad" because that is what it is. I was just trying to point out the differences when it comes to society's opinion on children's "bad" behavior based upon economic standards. After all...if you are middle to upper class you could not possibly be a lazy parent....(complete sarcasm, just to avoid confusion) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:38 AM Flag
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I don't buy that "gifted" kids have behavior problems any more often than the general population, so I don't like it when parents attribute behavior to the giftedness, or not being sufficiently challenged etc. I have a very well-behaved "highly gifted" boy, and there are many in DC's gifted class. There are also many with behavior problems, just like in gen ed. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:16 AM Flag
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i'm just posting as a teacher - sometimes there does seem to be a correlation, not always i will admit. but sometimes because kids (boys and girls) find the material below their level they act out because they don't know any other way to communicate their difficulty with being bored. some kids with asberger's are usually highly intelligent and they just need the proper tools to be able to harness both the intelligence and the ability to act appropriately [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:31 AM Flag
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And sometimes their brains have asychronous development. The intellectual is advanced and the social is lagging behind. It doesn't mean the social will ALWAYS lag behind. And it doesn't mean that because the brain has been developing so rapdidly intellectually that there is a disorder. It may all work out in due time. As a society we are swinging way too far on the evaluate, dx, therapy, medicate our children path. My goodness, it is first grade. Remember first grade? These people have a lifetime to develop. It is NOT over at age 7 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:35 AM Flag
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but isn't it also true that kids that re having a hard time with the material may act out because they are frustrated? i can understand the phenomenon you are talking about but its seems a long jump from there to say acting up is more likely if a child is gifted. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:40 AM Flag
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If you are interested in the plight of gifted chidlren and their behavoir, there are numerous books in the library on that topic. I don't UB is the best resource. Guiding the Gifted Child is a great start, Genius Denied is also an excellent book on the topic of how gifted children have been and are being treated in schools in the US. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:42 AM Flag
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i'm not asking for that. i am saying any correlation between "acts up in class" and "gifted" has got to be pretty weak. signed, formerly gifted school kid who just read under her desk when seh was bored [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:44 AM Flag
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So you just want to make up your own research? OK. I thought you were really into the ins and outs of the plight of gifted children. Signed gifted adult who was teachers pet but understands that my experience is not everyone's experience - [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:47 AM Flag
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The Gifted Child in the Classroom is another book in addition to the ones already suggested and if you read it, you might alter your "weak" hypothesis. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:55 AM Flag
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That is girl behavoir. That is not boy behavoir. That is why it is so hard on a poor minortiy boy like the poster above said. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:51 AM Flag
[ - ] Friends who send you political things, assuming you're on the same side - do you tell them nicely that you're NOT, or do you just ignore? 10 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 10:47 AM Flag
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I always respond in a kind and thoughtful, repsectful manner. Respond to the message they sent I mean. IE, if someone sent me a pro life email - I would respond and say, Susan, I'm a bit surprised that you and I haven't had this discussion yet, but I am most decidely pro choice and disagree with what... and go on to address the contents of the email. kwim? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 10:49 AM Flag
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yes, that's similar to what I'm getting from a college friend. she sent me the video of palin at her church. trying to decide if it's worth having the discussion or not. I think she might get offended, but I don't want any MORE emails. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 10:51 AM Flag
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If you don't want any more emails (it doesn't bother me to get them), then just write a nice note saying that apparently the two of you disagree on some politcal issues and you value the friendship too much to have something like politics get in the way so you would appreciate it if she removed you from her political email group list. You can probably say it better than that, but you get the idea. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 10:56 AM Flag
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I think it is good to get emails from friends with other perspectives, it helps to keep me well informed and not ignorant to the other side. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:06 AM Flag
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are most of those emails actually well-informed? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:07 AM Flag
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It at least sparks the interest and most of the time i will check them out on snopes.com or factorfiction.com . [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:11 AM Flag
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np: I have two groups of friends who I email with regularly. One group (high school and others) runs the spectrum and is politically aware. We talk/write politics all the time. The other group (college) also covers the spectrum but I find them less well read and much more reactionary. I don't participate in political email discussions with them. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.15.08, 07:33 AM Flag
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Most of my friends know my political leanings. When I do get occasonal one who doesn't I simple given them a question to think about. Something that will sho that amd eithe playing devil's advocate or that i stronglydiagree with their point. then they will usually apologize the the misundesrtanding. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.15.08, 07:23 AM Flag
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i will just tell them nicely that i do not agree. i will, maybe, give them a poignant phrase/quotation to help them question their political beliefs ............... or not make assumptions about mine. either way they are nearly always polite about it. if they are not then they probably are not my friend. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.15.08, 07:27 AM Flag
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i received one from my cousin and we are on different sides of the political sprectrum. i said while i appreciate most of her emails - could she please leave me off the ones that specifically deal with politics [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.15.08, 07:32 AM Flag
[ - ] good art classes for 4 yr olds? 1 Reply [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 10:38 AM Flag
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92nd street Y [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 10:54 AM Flag
[ - ] Does EBF mean only the boob or does it include pumping? I do not understand how people BF and do not pump. Not being mean or snarky, just want to understand how someone could BF for a year (or more) and not pump - how they would go to work at an office, go to the dentist, go to a movie, a friend’s wedding, a night out with husband, or just be away from their child for a few hours. 12 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 10:37 AM Flag
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it means only breastmilk injested - by boob or bottle. Just no forumula [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 10:38 AM Flag
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And if you have a newborn, breastfeeding changes over the course of time. I don't think you could ebf and work without pumping, but as the child gets older and you introduce solids you can get away from the child for the movie or shopping etc without pumping. You get pretty good at timing things. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 10:39 AM Flag
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op: my dc is 2 months and when I went to OB last week, it took 3 hours – taxis, waiting, then appointment. So someone gave her bottle of bm at home. Just wondering if you don’t pump/bottle, how you get away for a chunk of time. I met someone who never pumped, so just wondering how she did it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 10:40 AM Flag
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She could probably tell you better than I can, but for the doc visit - I just brought baby and friend with me. I could nurse in taxi or waiting room etc. If you have someone caring for your db at home, it isn't that hard to have them just tag along IF that is what you want. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 10:41 AM Flag
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But how about a wedding. Do you think she would bring her baby to a wedding or just not go? I can't ask her, only met her once. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 10:43 AM Flag
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If I were invited to a wedding (I wasn't during this time) I would either pump or have baby close enough to nurse. If you are out of town, then caregiver just stays in hotel room and you bop up in between functions and nurse, or you pump. I think its something every mom and baby work out - some women despise pumping, some don't mind at all. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 10:45 AM Flag
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Are you invited to a wedding or did you just make up this scenerio for arguments sake? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 10:46 AM Flag
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If you only met this person once, why are you so interested in her nursing habits and her social invitations? That, I don't get. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 10:47 AM Flag
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I gues b/c I can't imagine bf'ing w/out pumping, esp for like 2 years. So I am just wondering how she does it. I guess she doesn't go anywhere without dc, so I guess that's my answer. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:37 AM Flag
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np: one thing to know is that a 9 m.o. doesn't need to be nursed as often as a 2 m.o. the three hour thing stretches out to 4 hrs by the time their 6 m.o. and then once they're eating solids, they nurse less. my kids only nursed 4x a day by the time they were 8 -9 m.o. and while i only nursed for a year, i imagine that kids who nurse longer only nurse at night or first thing in the a.m. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:41 AM Flag
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after the first year, you really don't need to pump becasue your kid can drink cow's milk or eat when hungry. even earlier, the nursings space out a lot. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:43 AM Flag
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maybe she always takes her dc with her? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 10:44 AM Flag
[ - ] Anyone know what happened at ps 166 last night? Around 6 PM, police trucks, armed cops, machine guns, bullet-proof vests and helmets. The playground was full and traffic was normal on the street as about 12 cops piled out in full gear and went inside the school. 2 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
NY Schools 09.12.08, 10:37 AM Flag
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Wow, no. did you google? If it were that big had to make some sort of news [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 10:47 AM Flag
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I noticed that they are shooting either a TV show or a movie in the area [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 02:08 PM Flag
[ - ] Is a letter from an alum a good letter of rec for a private school. We're not talking a member of the board of high profile person. Just someone who went to a school, loved it and knows our child really well. 4 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
NY Schools 09.12.08, 10:35 AM Flag
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yes, alum is good [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 10:35 AM Flag
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even if not "noteworthy?" great. thx. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 10:36 AM Flag
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it's better than a totally alien. common sense tell you that [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 11:30 AM Flag
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better than someone not affiliated with the school, not as good as a board member. where in the middle it falls depends on how much $/time they contribute. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 04:24 PM Flag
[ - ] any ideas for a middle name for gavin? our last name is simple and two syllables. thanks! 2 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 10:34 AM Flag
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use a one syllable or a three syllable. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 10:36 AM Flag
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ideas? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 10:37 AM Flag
[ - ] Where can I buy my 17 month old son a Halloween costume online? 3 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 10:33 AM Flag
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google is your friend. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 10:34 AM Flag
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sensationalbeginnings.com they have good stuff for toddlers [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 10:37 AM Flag
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target, ebay, old navy [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.12.08, 10:38 AM Flag
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