• Filter the conversation
[ - ] I know a young couple, she's 22 he's 25 that registered a Berdorf for Limgoes china that cost over $800.00 per setting, he wanted this and his family has money. WWYD? Buy them sets or give cash? 24 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 02:26 PM Flag
»
How many sets would you buy at $800 a go - I would break off $200 worth of the charger and call it a gift. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 02:27 PM Flag
»
LOL :) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 02:28 PM Flag
»
do not do either - go to simon pierce and get them a beautiful, useful glass pitcher (can also be used as a vase) and ignore the registry all together - if his family has money, let them spend it [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 02:37 PM Flag
»
eh, its one thing to give cash but to go off the registry entirely for something so pedestrian? I see Simon Pearce and I think "regift". [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 02:42 PM Flag
»
then write a check - i'd be annoyed at the tenor of the registry itself and do this for my own satisfaction - generally i give checks [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 02:43 PM Flag
»
NP and I agree with this, it scream pretenious I'd give cash/check and leave it at that. Not sure they would appreciate the pitcher. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 02:46 PM Flag
»
There was nothing on the registry at a lower price point? They expected you to buy an ENTIRE setting? When I got married, I registered for very good china, as well--but I only expected that people would be able to buy one suacer, or one plate, etc. I also made sure there were many other items on the registry at various price points (as some people don't like to buy a plate as a wedding gift). As for giving cash/check: In some cultures, this is accepted (or even expected/preferred). In others, it is considred to be very bad taste. You should not give cash/check if the bride and grrom are from a culture where this is not done, imho. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 02:57 PM Flag
»
ditto - people bought pieces not entire place settings - same for my silver flatware [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 02:59 PM Flag
»
The people are Persian. Does that matter? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 03:06 PM Flag
»
I am sure it does. (For instance, if you are a a traditional WASP from a good family, cash is usually a no-no--esp. if you are Southern. In fact, if you are old school, you may not even have a registry at all, as it will be expected that guests will know/ask bridesmaids what your china/silver pattern is. My friends who are second generation Italian American from New Jersey, though, expect and prefer gifts of cash. Pepole are brought up with different cultural expcetations.) I wish I knew more about the traditions in Persian marriages... Do you have any other friends you can ask? Or write a new post on UB at a busy time that asks the specific question about Persian wedding gifts. I have to ask, though--they really only gave you the option of giving an entire $800 setting? My final thought is that you simply buy one plate, or saucer, etc. from BG. If you make sure you indicate to BG that you are trying to buy for the bride and groom's registry, BG should just credit the couple's registry for that amount. It is kind of like a gift card without the tackiness quotient. The more I think about it, the more I'd call BG china dept., indicate that would would like to spend $X on the couple registered there, and ask how they might help you do that. GL [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 03:20 PM Flag
»
I'm the OP and will ask his Aunt what other options there are on the registry, thank you. It threw me this was all she mentioned. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 03:25 PM Flag
»
The registry is not on-line at BG.com? Check that first ( BG will also fax you a list of otems and price points, I'm sure...) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 03:27 PM Flag
»
I'm an old-school WASP (good china, silver, etc. is standard no matter how much or little $$$ one has), but I too would be *stunned* to hear that average price point was $800. To do that would be in extremely bad taste, imho. I truly hope when you actually see the registry that it has a more balanced approach. Go to BG.com and/or cll the wedding registry/china dept. and ask them to fax you the list. GL [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 03:31 PM Flag
»
Persians are the cheapest when it comes to weddings be forewarned. They tend give cash for weddings and not very much of it. I know very wealthy Persians so its a fact. YOu can give $200 and be set. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 04:02 PM Flag
»
I registered at Scully and Scully in a very similar manner. I listed each piece of china individually (as even a saucer was over $100). I really wonder if the OP's friends only listed entire place settings. It seems to ne that she is bothered by how much the OP's china costs. Some people get their noses out of joint if the registry is not at C &B, PB, WS, etc., even if there are plenty of items available at the same price points. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 03:10 PM Flag
»
I'm the OP and not bothered by how much their china costs at all. His Aunt announced this and said he's the one that wanted it, I don't know if he's sending a message to the womans family. She's a sales clerk at Berdorf and he's in a line of Persian money. His Father and two brothers are in retail. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 03:15 PM Flag
»
Hmmm. He might be trying to send a message. Or he might just be a cluless guy who just didn't think about the fact that some of his (or her) friends might not want/be able to spend $800 per gift. He might not have even have looked at the price tag, or thought about how ther registry should be set up. He might have just slected the china pattern and told the salesclerk to take care of listing it. Who knows? I'd figure out how much you want to spend, call BG, and have them help you find an item that works. (As I said, BG might just credit the amount of your "gift" to the couple...) GL [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 03:25 PM Flag
»
at that age, they have no clue. she is hooking on for the first wives club. spend what you are comfortable spending and assume this is a starter marriage [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 04:04 PM Flag
»
I am guessing that groom's mother is behind all this. Ita w pp. Call BG, tell them what you want to spend, and it will be cr'd to the acct. $800 is totally over the top. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 04:12 PM Flag
»
spend what you would normally spend. if they don't like it, they will return it. or give them cash. during these times, no need to be dictated on what you should be giving. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 04:32 PM Flag
»
I am sure the parents' friend will get them the limoge. I would phone BG and tell the people your price point and they will work with you. Most people there have buy & hold registries anyway, so technically EVERYONE is buying them a gift card. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 04:38 PM Flag
»
does BG tell the happy couple how much each guest spent [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 04:41 PM Flag
»
i think these young kids today think that everyone should be buying them outrageously expensive gifts. their parents should have told them that their choice in tableware was ridiculous [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 04:43 PM Flag
»
can you give the sugar dish and creamer, salt and pepper shakers? Serving platter? Does anything fit your budget better than the place setting? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 04:52 PM Flag
[ - ] Can anyone tell me what withdrawl symptoms are? I took my son (17-months)off of gluten and I'm not sure if he is withdrawing or just something else is bothering him. 3 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 02:10 PM Flag
»
why did you take him off gluten? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 02:14 PM Flag
»
he might have pdd, noticed a lot of signs over the past two months. And they have been increasing. The one that concerns me the most is lack of immitation and he doesn't attempt to speak.I did a ton of research and decided to test to see if removing the gluten from his diet would do anything. most of the wheat came from the Cheerios he ate every day throughout the day. i've read that some kids show signs of withdrawl, but they never write what those signs are. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 02:45 PM Flag
»
Whoa - I assume you have seen a dev. pediatrician and received a diagnosis? If not you are experimenting with some pretty alternative measures. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 04:22 PM Flag
[ - ] Potty training question: My 2.5 dd has been peeing and occasionally pooping on the potty for a couple of weeks now - but only does it when she's home or at a relative's home with the floor potty. What's the next step? I put her in diapers when we go out, ask her to tell me if she has to pee and I carry a portable potty with me, but she doesn't seem to want to use it. Hasn't used the potty when nanny is with her at all. 5 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 02:09 PM Flag
»
I'm trying to remember exactly how it worked w/ my 2 y.o. (she's 2.5 now) when she potty trained. There were a few days in there where we stuck close to home and ran to the potty. But I think we just went to panties pretty quickly. Before we went out I'd have her sit on the potty and then I'd try to keep trips out short. Initially strange toilets scared her a little, but she got through it. I had her sit facing backwards at first to feel more secure. I think she had one or two accidents all together (home & out). As far as our sitter I just told her each time to remind her. It all worked out. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 02:16 PM Flag
»
Thanks! It sounds like I just have to move forward and assume that accidents will happen but it' [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 05:13 PM Flag
»
^^it's probably a good idea to move into panties soon. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 05:14 PM Flag
»
Take advantage of summer - I would leave her with no pants on at home for two days and let her use the potty full time. NO pants means fewer accidents and more incentive to use the potty. Put undies on after a few days and forget all diapers [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 05:23 PM Flag
»
Gulp! I think I just have to take the leap. I think dd is ready - she's the one that instigated the potty use to begin with! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 05:43 PM Flag
[ - ] is there any way to track websites that someone went on other than by looking in their history, which only goes back 2 weeks? 2 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 02:07 PM Flag
»
i don't think so but you can put spyware on your computer to track what your dh (assume) is doing. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 02:09 PM Flag
»
if you go to do a search and start plugging in letters of the alphabet, it will show lots of searched sites (unless someone intentionally cleared it) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 02:39 PM Flag
[ - ] I need house warming gift ideas, actually new apartment, for a couple, he's 48 she's 45 very nice couple. I have a lotus bowl from Crate and Barrel and would to add things to it, floating candles, nice napkins. Ideas please? TIA 3 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 02:06 PM Flag
»
towels are nice but only if you know what the color of the bathroom is. If they live in NYC, don't give them anything that will take up space! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 02:15 PM Flag
»
Great ideas thank you. I asked the dh to be about towels and he didn't know anything. The apt is in Queens so they have some room. Would you buy white towels? I don't know the colors she likes other than he mentioned she selected a 'grape' colored sofa. Not sure if that's a deep plum. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 02:23 PM Flag
»
Really cool doormat [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 04:53 PM Flag
[ - ] i never realized how lonelyit is being a single parent. i have a family that is around and tons of friends but it really is just me and ds 2 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 01:41 PM Flag
»
is the father involved at all? can you hook up with other mothers? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 01:45 PM Flag
»
Its lonely being a married parent too! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 02:06 PM Flag
[ - ] I have a beautiful Vanessa Bellini crib with custom crib bedding that is getting no responses on craigs list (http://newyork.craigslist.org/mnh/bab/761597736.html). Ideas for selling? 5 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
Expecting 07.20.08, 01:27 PM Flag
»
$850 for your crib and used sheets!? Here is an idea for selling....give it away or move it out the door for $200. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 02:06 PM Flag
»
If you want to make it look like your daughter never slept in it raise it back to the infant height. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 02:10 PM Flag
»
Someone spending that kind of money will go w/ something new. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 02:12 PM Flag
»
you obviously have money. donate it and get the tax write off! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 02:14 PM Flag
»
The style of the crib is very avg. It does not look like a high end crib - and I had a Bellini also that I bought 2nd hand for $175 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 03:10 PM Flag
[ - ] Where or in what does your 1yo watch tv/videos? Outgrowing bouncy, and need to explore options ... safety is obviously a big factor. 11 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 01:22 PM Flag
»
mine uses the couch. outgrew bouncy at 6 months. try a bean bag chair? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 01:24 PM Flag
»
I was hoping there might be something that I can strap her into. She moves around a lot and I can't always be right there next to her. Someone here suggested a pack n play the other day, but I wonder if there isn't some great chair out there that I don't know about. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 01:27 PM Flag
»
np. What are you looking for... a chair dc can sit on for a few mins to watch a cartoon or something to limit her mobility to a safe area? I have a horrible image now of your child being strapped into a chair in front of the tv for hours! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 01:29 PM Flag
»
No! Nothing like that! She watches one Baby Einstein video before bedtime. She loves it, but she also loves moving around, and sometimes, I need to leave the room (have two other small children), so I need something that is safe. A PnP is good, but I like the idea of a chair so that she gets the idea of sitting down to watch her video. I know that seems a little forceful, though, but my other kids walk around their videos and it kind of drives me nuts ... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 01:31 PM Flag
»
Lol. Oh that sounds better! I don't know of any chairs with straps for that age but maybe if she had her own chair like the armchairs from PBK she might like it enough to sit still while watching her video. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 01:34 PM Flag
»
^I don't think a PnP is really what you need. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 01:35 PM Flag
»
my son never sits for a video their not old enough for that yet. are worried he might hurt the younger children? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 01:35 PM Flag
»
My ped said that a child under 2 should not be watching videos. Just sayin....not sure it's realisitc. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 01:41 PM Flag
»
Not even a Baby Einstein? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 01:58 PM Flag
»
no, not even baby einstein. i was shocked myself! however, i will tell you that i know her personally and saw her watching TV while her child was in the room, so go figure! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 02:01 PM Flag
»
I guess ... DD loves her videos ... she coos and screams and laughs and really has a great time watching them. I don't know what the cons are ... do you figure it's too much strain on their eyes or some other physical problem? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 02:17 PM Flag
[ - ] any psychic moms lefts? 0 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 01:22 PM Flag
[ - ] MYOB I know but...cousin just registered for 4 different types of Waterford crystal goblets (15 settings in total). Couple live in a 1 bedroom rental. 14 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 01:10 PM Flag
»
Okay, I don't know why you would need 15 place settings, but we did register for 12 place settings of everything, which we got, and we lived in a 1 bedroom rental, too. We put it all in the china cabinet, lived their for 2 years, and now it is in our house that we own. You only get married once (you hope)! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 01:13 PM Flag
»
^^I meant "lived there." sorry. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 01:14 PM Flag
»
np: how often do you use the china? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 02:04 PM Flag
»
Holidays and the occasional dinner party. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 04:28 PM Flag
»
Maybe they plan on smashing a few over the years. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 01:17 PM Flag
»
^^This is true. I registered for only the number of china place settings I was getting in crystal, but for casual wine glasses, I registered for 4 more than the number of casual place settings, in case some broke. In the past 6 years, more than 4 have broken! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 01:21 PM Flag
»
Maybe the plan to cash them in for a down payment. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 01:19 PM Flag
»
I also live in a 1bedroom rental and have a place setting for 12. Hoping to use it in my house or larger apt. one day. This is not unusual or tacky. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 02:06 PM Flag
»
At the risk of sounding cruel...wouldn't the money have been more useful if put towards a down payment? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 02:07 PM Flag
»
no, i can't afford a house anyway right now. it's tacky to ask people to give you money. it's socially acceptable to register for gifts. this is society! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 02:10 PM Flag
»
lol according to UB if people want money money is what they get! I still think the $1-2k. this stuff cost you would be better off in a bank. You will never use this stuff [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 02:12 PM Flag
»
it didn't cost me a thing. it was a GIFT from family. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 02:13 PM Flag
»
Gifts can be practical and they were purchased because that is what YOU asked for. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 02:26 PM Flag
»
There are different cultural norms in wedding gifts. IN some cultures, it is accepted/expected that people will give cash for the reasons you have alluded to. In other cultures, no matter how cash strapped the couple may be, it is considered unacceptable to ask for or give money. One has to respect the culture of the recipiants when giving a gift, imho. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 03:01 PM Flag
[ - ] Considering upholstered furniture from Mitchell Gold, Pottery Barn or JCPenney. Any reviews of either? 2 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 01:04 PM Flag
»
That's quite a range. If money is no object, go for Mitchell Gold. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 01:21 PM Flag
»
They are are between 900 - 1200 for the slipcovered sofa I want. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 02:03 PM Flag
[ - ] sigh. dc woke up. i'm pretending not to hear her calling me. 1 Reply [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 01:04 PM Flag
»
Give her a long, fun bath. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 01:20 PM Flag
[ - ] How would you handle this? DH and I are really, really TTC. Right now, I'm in the 1ww for this cycle. Anyway, my dear friend and I had planned to take a trip this summer, and she is trying to pin me down on a date, and says the wknd of 8/2-3 works best for her, and it sounds like it may be the only wknd she can do. The problem with that weekend is that, if I don't get pregnant (my period is due next weekend), that weekend falls right in my fertile window before ovulation (I usually have high fertility days 7-9/10 or so, and ovulate on either the 10th to the 11th or the 11th to the 12th (I use the CBEFM so you are shown 2 O days). That weekend falls on days 8-9. Do I tell her I can't give her a date yet? Should I be honest with her? Is that tacky to say? I mean, I just don't know what to say. AND, I have been really looking forward to our trip! So, it's not that I don't want to go. Thoughts, ladies?! 13 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 01:01 PM Flag
»
^^ I hate how new UB cuts you off. The rest of what I said was: Is that tacky? And the thing is, I really was looking forward to our trip together. Not sure what to do. Thoughts, ladies? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 01:02 PM Flag
»
please do not be honest with her. i'd say go anway (you can have sex right before and right after) but if you decide not to go, please don't tell her why. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 01:03 PM Flag
»
np: why so firm on this? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 01:05 PM Flag
»
OP: See that's my instinct, too. I just don't want her to think I am flaking. Sorry, I forgot to add: SHE'S MOVING TO PARIS, so this will be a last visit for a while. :( All the more stressful! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 01:08 PM Flag
»
^^OP: Also, if I'm not inclined to flake, should I tell her why the following weekend would work better for me, even though the wknd of 8/2-3 works better for her? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 01:12 PM Flag
»
are her reasons as valid as yours? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 03:14 PM Flag
»
Her reason is that she is at the end of a language study course she is taking before she moves to Paris, and she'll want to be studying that weekend. So, yes, but in a totally different way. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 04:22 PM Flag
»
Relax and try no to let ttc rule your life. Go and see your friend and have fun. Being relaxed will probably improve your chance of conceiving. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 01:16 PM Flag
»
I know. It's just hard b/c I'm not so young, so I hate to miss a month. I guess if we have sex on Friday before I go, and then on Sunday when I get back, we'll just be missing Saturday...right? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 01:19 PM Flag
»
Yes, do that then enjoy the weekend with your friend. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 01:21 PM Flag
»
I can't believe this is even a question. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 03:45 PM Flag
»
OP: Well, maybe you haven't had to try hard to TTC. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 04:22 PM Flag
»
Its just a weekend - have sex before and after and GO. Esp if she is moving. sperm last for days. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 03:57 PM Flag
[ - ] psychic mom- am i preg? 2 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
Toddler 07.20.08, 01:01 PM Flag
»
don't think so? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 01:25 PM Flag
»
im srry, no your not [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 03:02 PM Flag
[ - ] psychic mom- am i preg? 0 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 12:56 PM Flag
[ - ] I'm shopping on Fresh Direct for a visiting family of five. Help me think about it. What should I get? 2 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 12:54 PM Flag
»
string cheese [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 12:57 PM Flag
»
Ooh, good one. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.20.08, 12:58 PM Flag
Refresh » New Post »
close [X]

close [X]

Select a Category (only 1)

category
Stages
Regions