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[ - ] I'm in the East Village--anyone know what's with the gun-fireworks-sounds going on for the past half hour?? 4 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:53 PM Flag
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Brooklyn Bridge Anniversary Fireworks [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:53 PM Flag
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really?? are they on the Manhattan side? they sound like they're right out my window [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:54 PM Flag
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oh that is good to know! I am hearing them in williamsburg too [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 06:03 PM Flag
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Fireworks celebrating Brooklyn Bridge's birthday. HB, BB! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:54 PM Flag
[ - ] Who is dirtier in bed -- you or DH? 3 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:52 PM Flag
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me by a thousand miles although DH purports to be "outta control" [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:53 PM Flag
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me, but he is a good student. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:55 PM Flag
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DH (I'm pretty vanilla!) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:59 PM Flag
[ - ] What's on TV tonight? 3 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:52 PM Flag
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TIVO [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:52 PM Flag
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grey's anatomy finale [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:52 PM Flag
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Unfortunately, Wonderpets on Noggin. The last of the night and then she is going to bed. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:53 PM Flag
[ - ] Need temp agencies to find a job as an Exec Asst. I'm desperate during a horrid divorce. I already called Suzanne Davis, Robert Half and Salomon Page. Anyone else, Please ? Thanks. 3 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:52 PM Flag
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Don't you have a temporary support ruling? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:52 PM Flag
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not yet. are you divorced or a lawyer? i am soooooooooo freaked about this. he is out of the country and not paying, to punish me. of course it's the children that are being punished. we are waiting (my lawyer and i) for the judge to come back with a temporary support ruling. and even then if he wants to continue to be a complete jerk he won't pay. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:55 PM Flag
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Headway or Gainor? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.23.08, 06:01 AM Flag
[ - ] Does anyone have mentally ill parents? Are they in your life? How do you deal with them? 4 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:50 PM Flag
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mil is. we see her about once a month, she lives not too far away. It is tough [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:55 PM Flag
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is she depressed? bipolar? and do your kids know? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:57 PM Flag
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Not quite -- but my parents were in a car accident and both had brain injuries and have lingering issues (that may look like mental health issues). My mom's memory for trivial things is spotty -- but she was always a bit spacey, so it can be hard to tell! My dad's injury was much more serious -- at one point, he was disoriented and agggressive and lost his language capabilities. He has made major strides and functions like a "healthy person" -- but he has mood swings (connected to the location of the neurosurgery) and he can be "off" from time to time (although never in public, so I wonder if he just "lets go" at home). They are very much in my life and I try to keep a postive outlook -- but there are times when the sadness of the situation overwhelms me (and then I pull back a bit, until I'm in less of a funk about it). [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:58 PM Flag
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Sorry I didn't see this before, because I've got a lot of experience with this. Depressed mother, depressed & slightly paranoid father....the depression isn't as hard to deal with as the paranoia, which can freak out the kids, as in some "I heard what you said!" accusation when they weren't talking at all. It's a difficult line to tread to keep them in my life, but not to let them do any harm. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.23.08, 01:41 PM Flag
[ - ] Ds is so shy that I'm worried about him separating for the ERB. He has a summmer bd, and there is no testing at the school during the summer. Should I have him take it at the office in the summer (where he may have trouble separating) or wait till the fall. If I wait till the fall, I won't have the scores until after we apply to schools. 18 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
NY Schools 05.22.08, 05:49 PM Flag
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IME, it is much, much better to wait. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:54 PM Flag
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you don't think not having the scores will hurt us? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:56 PM Flag
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you may have to cata wider net of schools (always a good idea, anyway) and you will still no long before the porcess is over....you may still be interviewing, anyway. Much better to have of a "hurt" to have not great scores than to not know the scores. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 06:07 PM Flag
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ughhh typo queen...cast a net, know long...process [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 06:08 PM Flag
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do any of the schools do pre-screening based on ERB scores? I feel like for a summer bd, we may get automatically eliminated due to the bd. If he has a high ERB, it may actually help, but if they're doing pre-screening they may not have the ERB. Am I overthinking this? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 06:16 PM Flag
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You are overthinking..take them in the fall. they will all interview you if you apply. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 06:18 PM Flag
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thanks for that. waiting seems to be the reasonable thing to do [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 06:22 PM Flag
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I personally feel Trinity prescreened as we interviewed way before scores were in and didn't get the time of day (even though clearly diverse). [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 07:10 PM Flag
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>>scores came in at 99x3 - but still too late. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 07:13 PM Flag
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do it at school if he is shy [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:54 PM Flag
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ITA. And not having the scores won't hurt you, OP. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 06:07 PM Flag
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OP: anyone else care to chime in? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 06:05 PM Flag
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Yes, my advice is to wait--particularly if he is just turning 4 this summer. At the schools they get them used to the tester and he will already be separated from you for the school day. Also that gives him extra time to mature. I will tell you from personal experience however that a summer boy is going to be almost impossible to place in school even if he does incredibly well on the ERB. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 06:08 PM Flag
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ita, even summer sibs were asked to wait a year this year (not related to feedback) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 06:09 PM Flag
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Our PSD said to wait until DC is 4-1/2. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 06:12 PM Flag
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I agree. DD was shy and I had her take ERB at school a few years ago. No issue about separating, and she did great. Am taking DS to the ERB office this summer, since he is not shy at all. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 06:11 PM Flag
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OP: Thanks all. Sounds like you all agree that I should wait. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 06:14 PM Flag
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My advice is to take it in October -- after DS has a chance to get acclimated to his new class, but in time to have results and make last minute adjustments to applications. And, of course, apply broadly. GL! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 06:16 PM Flag
[ - ] anyone know the laws regarding child support payments? My husband currently pays child support to his ex. His daughter is 17 and his son is 15. Does it stop when they turn 18? or 21? 11 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:47 PM Flag
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My guess is through college or 21 but it is all spelled out in his agreement. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:48 PM Flag
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won't he still have to help them with school and such? I wouldn't worry about the legalities so much. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:48 PM Flag
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hijak - is he planning to pay for college? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:48 PM Flag
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he is paying the whole college tuiton. Does he still need to pay child support? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:50 PM Flag
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then depends on his agreement. I would think he would need to subsidize them while at school if he could. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:51 PM Flag
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he will give money to his kid in college, absolutely. But does he still have to send a check to his ex every month - even though she won't be living with her. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:53 PM Flag
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it's 18 if they don't go to college...21 if they do [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:49 PM Flag
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depends on court order &/or agreement. I know someone who agreed to support until kids were 25. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:50 PM Flag
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man, I was married at 24. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 06:03 PM Flag
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why don't you ask a lawyer [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:54 PM Flag
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why don't you ask your husband? he should know. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 06:02 PM Flag
[ - ] Tell me something good about having 3 kids. Just got a positive...wasn't planning or expecting or wanting this at all. It will change SO much and all I can think of is the negatives. 42 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:46 PM Flag
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You will be giving them another sibling. You will love this child. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:47 PM Flag
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does another sibling make up for the loss of attention from parents? I feel like I'm stretched thin as it is. ugh. baby is only 9.5 months.... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:48 PM Flag
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yes, but look at jon and kate plus 8 - it is going to be a lot of fun [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:50 PM Flag
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Goodness, I hope that jon and kate plus 8 is NOT the type of fun I am in for! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:52 PM Flag
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eventually, after the hard part of babyhood, you are going to have a lot of fun with three and they will play together - you will like it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:55 PM Flag
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I sure hope so!! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:56 PM Flag
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how old is oldest dc? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:54 PM Flag
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He's 3.5 (so he'll be a little over 4 and my daughter will be 18 months). [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:55 PM Flag
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You will let go of wanting to control everything and be happier because of it (or at least, I did). [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:49 PM Flag
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this child might be the light of your life... you might be pleasantly surprised... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:49 PM Flag
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It might be tough the first year or two but you will never regret your third. In the big picture, the early years will fly by. Give yourself time to adjust. I would be freaked if my #2 was 9.5 mos but in some ways you are lucky that the decision was made for you (accidently). We go back and forth about #3 all the time for the reasons you mentioned- it is hard to pull the trigger deliberately! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:51 PM Flag
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great answer [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:52 PM Flag
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the only trigger we were planning to pull was the vasectomy doctor's. DH is so regretting putting off that appointment. We literally did it ONCE the day after my period ended. I still don't see how I possibly oculd have been ovulating. ugh. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:53 PM Flag
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spiritually, this baby has chosen you and you have been chosen to be a parent again at this time. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:56 PM Flag
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I keep telling myself this as well. I just worry that I'm somehow jeopardizing the great family that we have and it scares me. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:57 PM Flag
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np, your family hasn't reached it's full greatness yet. with this new db... it will. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 06:05 PM Flag
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maybe you'll miscarry [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 08:01 PM Flag
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You're a turd [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 09:41 PM Flag
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i love it. i feel like it's made me a better parent. there are fewer comparisons between kids. it used to be "he's a good eater but she's not". even trying not to, every strong aspect about one child was in comparison to the other. but when there are three or more, their strengths are theirs, not as exclusions to someone else. hope this makes sense. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:53 PM Flag
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yes, I can see that. I'm fine with it a few years from now. I just REALLY don't want to go through the pregnancy and I worry enough about the 2 I have...another newborn might push me over the edge. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:54 PM Flag
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can you afford any help? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:57 PM Flag
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I have help so I really shouldn't complain, but, another year of nursing and not sleepign through the night and being fat and sick and grouch is NOT what I'm in the mood for. No amount of help really helps that. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:59 PM Flag
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OR: it doesn't end up feeling like that. it's just a continuation. much harder to stop and start up again. you'll be in the groove, you'll have everything ready. it's not like you'll have to start dealing with diapers bags and changing tables all over again. everything is there and ready. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 06:03 PM Flag
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lol! I totally hear you on that. Like someone said above, though, as hellish is all that is, it really will just be a blip on the screen in the big picture. I always say that maybe we'll do things differently if we had a third like....gasp, hire a night nurse or something like that! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 06:03 PM Flag
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thanks everyone. it is just overwhelming...will need new car, bye bye guestroom, etc. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 06:06 PM Flag
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my dcs are also close in age. i found the pregnancy to be harder than dealing with dcs. (i had three under three). i can tell you the following: it's normal to have mood swings when you are pregnant. it's normal to feel like you can't handle things. take it one day at a time. don't sweat the small stuff. and just hang in there. good luck. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:57 PM Flag
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honestly, OP, if you really don't watn to go through with it, don't. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 06:00 PM Flag
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I know I have options, that is probably why I am so stressed. If I felt differently then I'd just have to happily adjust to the idea! (which I am trying to do anyway) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 06:02 PM Flag
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I had two and at 41 went for #3. It took 4 yrs and it is the best thing we ever did. I wanted this child so much I nearly lost my mind waiting for him. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:56 PM Flag
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I just wish I was in the "I wanted this child so much" frame of mind. I have plenty of friends who would LOVE to get a positive result and here I am not feeling at all grateful and just mourning the loss of my 2 child family. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 06:01 PM Flag
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you are already busy. #3 fits right in, and a new baby is a source of joy - you tend to forget how lovely they are as your kids grow. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 06:00 PM Flag
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true. And I do love my kids so so much that I'd love a million of them. I was also just ready to be done with this phase - they can do so much more as they are older and now it just seems like starting over. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 06:03 PM Flag
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my #3 is almost 6mo, and it has gone by so quickly, I just wish I could pause time and enjoy him as this little one indefinitely. you may not believe it, but the third's babyhood goes by SOOOOO quickly. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 06:07 PM Flag
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I do believe it. My #2's has flown by and now she wont' even get to be the baby anymore! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 06:08 PM Flag
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ah! but now she'll be a big sister, and that is awesome too :-) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 06:18 PM Flag
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having a third was a big mistake. i love #3 but i regret it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 06:07 PM Flag
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that is NOT the answer I want to hear :-). I'm sure I may regret it, but, if we don't go through with this, I may regret that as well. I'll just try to have no regrets either way, right? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 06:13 PM Flag
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i'm sorry, i'm at a low point right now. i haven't taken my meds. you will love having #3. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 06:14 PM Flag
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My frend wept when she found out about #3 but adjusted and is really, really happy. Of course your realize if you were BFing this would not have happened with #2 an 9.5 mos. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 06:45 PM Flag
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wow. you are an idiot [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 08:05 PM Flag
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ITTA, she is an idiot. But out of curiousity, OP: were you bfing? I know there's a *chance* of getting pg, so just wondering... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 09:47 PM Flag
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how Does DH feel about it? how old are you btw? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 06:48 PM Flag
[ - ] 12 mo has always fallen asleep really easily for naps and bedtime. A week ago we took away pacifier and now there is 5 minutes of hysterics before she falls asleep and if she happens to wake up in the middle of the night (rare), its the same thing. When will she learn to fall asleep on her own again?? This is killing me 3 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:46 PM Flag
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no one??? new UB sucks [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:48 PM Flag
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whatever you do, you did the right thing. dumb pacifier was the devil's instrument, heaven forbid we lost it, there was hell to pay. I am so glad its gone from here [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:49 PM Flag
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try a new bedtime routine - to make up for the 5 minutes of hysterics - perhaps a new stuffed animal, bedtime book, etc. If she wakes up in the middle of the night wait for her to go back to sleep on her own. After a few nights it should be fine. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 06:09 PM Flag
[ - ] Am I the only one sick of seeing all of the school posts?? 2 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:45 PM Flag
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Just wait it gets worse certain times of year [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:46 PM Flag
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NY Schools is the only setting I deselected [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:47 PM Flag
[ - ] Is anyone in love with someone they can never, ever be with? 4 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:45 PM Flag
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I think so but the grass is always greener [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:45 PM Flag
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I think I will always love my college bf. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:46 PM Flag
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i used to be and then i realized what a loser he was.... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:46 PM Flag
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Coach Taylor [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:46 PM Flag
[ - ] i love my mil. gasp. 8 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:44 PM Flag
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i wouldn't use the word "love," but i really respect mine... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:45 PM Flag
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i leave the house to do errands when they come over, they come to see the kids not me [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:47 PM Flag
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that sucks [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:47 PM Flag
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listen I SAH all week with these kids and I don't think its a big deal to run out and get a few things done while they are here. They live locally I see them often enough where I am captive anyway [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:52 PM Flag
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i meant it sucks that you have to leave the house because they're intolerable [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:57 PM Flag
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are you worried you could be this horrid mil for someone else?? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:48 PM Flag
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lol. no. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:51 PM Flag
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lucky. i wish i could run out to do errands when in-laws come over. they get a little panicky with the grandkids when i'm not around. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:58 PM Flag
[ - ] long weekend birthday party scheduled for nephew. is it horrible to skip it. 2 hours there and 2 hours back. I am 34 weeks pregnant. 3 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:43 PM Flag
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totally fine to skip it. send a present along... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:43 PM Flag
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i delivered at 35 wks, so my vote is no. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:44 PM Flag
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no brainer, send the rest of your family and take a day to yourself. I did that when we had a party in south jersey three hours away from my house, dh took my dd and I actually got together with a friend locally [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:44 PM Flag
[ - ] PhD moms: how do i get over by physiologically sick of writing 5 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:42 PM Flag
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ask your question again in English. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:43 PM Flag
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[ Removed by moderator ] [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:44 PM Flag
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my SIL just finally finished her thesis and she is soooooo happy. good luck... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:44 PM Flag
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i literally feel imprisoned [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:45 PM Flag
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she did, too, and she was and is still TTCing (more than 2 yrs) -- I'm so happy that she's getting her PhD this weekend. I'm so proud of her! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:47 PM Flag
[ - ] I dislike mil and she dislikes me. Things have gotten much, much worse since DS was born. I think she would kill me and take my baby if she could get away with it. I don't know how I'm going to handle holidays, etc. with her from now on. 14 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:41 PM Flag
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what issues do you have with each other? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:42 PM Flag
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she wants to tell me what to do and criticize and judge everything I wear, every statement I make, etc. she wants to come and go in my house as she pleases and is angry that we asked her to call first. she emails and calls me constantly and then is mean to me when I respond to her. she gives me dirty looks. i think she's really crazy. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:45 PM Flag
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Don't do holidays with her. She gets ONE holiday; your parents get another; you guys get the rest with your very own family. Take back the holidays! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:43 PM Flag
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i sooo don't get the MIL hate thing. i mean, she raised dh. show some respect [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:43 PM Flag
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i am respectful of her. i have never been rude to her. you don't know this woman, how can you judge me based on what I've written? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:46 PM Flag
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i'm not judging you, but using terms like "hate" are prob not the most respectful thing to say about dcs grandmother. just imho [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:47 PM Flag
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f off [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:49 PM Flag
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i'm saying, you hate the woman who birthed your dh... i hope you don't end up in her position in 30 yrs [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:50 PM Flag
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Come respect mine for me. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:46 PM Flag
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dramamama [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:44 PM Flag
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[ Removed by moderator ] [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:45 PM Flag
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ita, just do it for dh and dcs [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:46 PM Flag
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it's all about boundaries - the lack of them. mil is not your mother but she behaves as though she is. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:53 PM Flag
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np: And you can tell your own mother where to stick it when she acts like this. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:54 PM Flag
[ - ] can anyone recommend a REALLY good divorce lawyer in manhattan or hoboken, NJ? thank you, 2 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
New York City 05.22.08, 05:39 PM Flag
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if you are in NJ, don't you need a lawyer in nj? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:41 PM Flag
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you need a lawyer licensed in NJ, which many NY offices are [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.08, 05:50 PM Flag
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