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[ - ] considering starting the divorce process. unemployed dh puts family last, mj first. recurring pattern, so wondering how to get the ball rolling, and how to protect myself and our dc. tips? 33 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:34 AM Flag
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Call a lawyer. This is serious stuff. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:36 AM Flag
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mj? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:37 AM Flag
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Marijuana? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:38 AM Flag
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op: yes, was trying to be a little discreet. don't know why i still try to protect him but. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:41 AM Flag
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op: yes marijuana. was trying to be discreet, don't know why. i do have to say that he doesn't use daily or anything like that but financially he's still spending $$ on it when we can't pay bills. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:43 AM Flag
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have you stopped spending money on all but the absolute necessities?...if he's not even smoking it everyday, it hardly sounds like he puts it before his family members, whom he presumably does spend lots of time with everyday...there must be bigger problems there [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:51 AM Flag
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op: fact is he's spending hundreds of dollars that we don't have on weed every month, and has been hiding that fact for at least a year. there are bigger problems afoot here, like trust, partnership, support, etc. which is why - divorce. so how do i do it? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 12:10 PM Flag
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is it worth giving him a chance to quit smoking pot before resorting to divorce...not just b/c of the pot & its expense, but b/c maybe he's willing to get his act together to save his marriage [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 12:35 PM Flag
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been down this road a million times. and it's not just about the pot. it's way more than that. if it were just about the pot, we'd have handled that long ago. he's not willing to get his act together overall, and it's a pattern that has repeated itself throughout our marriage. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 12:51 PM Flag
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ok then...do you have any divorced friends who could talk you through the process?...if not, i think finding a good lawyer is the 1st thing you need to do [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 12:55 PM Flag
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what is mj? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:40 AM Flag
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the evil weed, i think [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:49 AM Flag
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evil...i believe you should get to know it a little better [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:52 AM Flag
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the seductive houseplant? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:59 AM Flag
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good for housewives everywhere? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 12:07 PM Flag
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Nature's Prozac [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 12:09 PM Flag
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so true...works like a charm for me &, unlike the poison the big pharma pushed, you can smoke it more, or less, or quit for awhile & no horrid side effects [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 12:38 PM Flag
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Why doesn't DH get a job? I mean, I know that's not easy at the moment, but how long has this been going on for? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:48 AM Flag
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it cant be the lack of job only, or half the country would be getting a div [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:51 AM Flag
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tell him its time to roll out of your joint [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:52 AM Flag
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rofl. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 12:05 PM Flag
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tell him he must get a job, any job. This economy is no time for sitting around getting stoned and living off of your wife's income. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 12:01 PM Flag
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What is his "profession"? What job is he waiting to walk in the door? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 12:04 PM Flag
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I assume you bring in the money? Who is taking care of the child(ren)? If not him, fire the nanny and force him to the kid(s) and the home. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 12:04 PM Flag
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if it were just about the money, i could see your point. but it's obviously more than that. so now what? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 12:27 PM Flag
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Hopefully your dh is not looking for a corporate job. Most companies today do drug testing. Pot stays in your system longer than most drugs. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 12:23 PM Flag
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throw away the pot. every time he buys it, throw it away. let him see how much of a waste it is. why keep illegal drugs in the same house as your child(ren)? if the police came and found drugs in your home they would take your child(ren) away from you. is that ok with you? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 12:32 PM Flag
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a bit extreme don't ya think?...absolutely no way that children get removed from a home b/c of some reefer...and why would the police be snooping around OP's apartment [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 12:37 PM Flag
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well what if a neighbor called and said there were drugs being used in a home where children were living? you think the police would just laugh and hang up? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 12:39 PM Flag
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not really sure...but if officers did come out to check into, parent would say "yes officer, i do occasionally light a joint after my kids go to sleep...it helps me relax"...and the officers would most certainly say, "well just try to be more discreet...you've got nosy neighbors and we don't want to have to waste another trip out here"...end of story [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 12:51 PM Flag
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you sound a little bit paranoid. Are you high? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 12:39 PM Flag
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nope, just like to follow the law. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 12:40 PM Flag
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drip, drip, drip [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 12:49 PM Flag
[ - ] What is the current thinking about Brick? 3 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
NY Schools 02.03.09, 11:34 AM Flag
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Better than sticks or straw. Ask the three pigs. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 12:18 PM Flag
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...sorry couldn't resist. It is a great school. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 12:19 PM Flag
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lol [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 12:19 PM Flag
[ - ] so, is tomorrow D-day for privates? i thought it was around 2-14? no? Best of luck to those of you waiting on news. 31 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
NY Schools 02.03.09, 11:24 AM Flag
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K admissions are mailed 2/13, but the "off-year" admissions are tomorrow...so there are more people waiting for the former [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:30 AM Flag
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oh my -- I thought off-year happened later, after they know for sure how many slots they will have -- we have not even completed file! oh well -- i guess we will try again next year, another off year [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:33 AM Flag
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you are correct for most schools. I am applying in an off year and was told they will not even know for at least a month if they have any spots open. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:41 AM Flag
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What year are you applying to? You will get some decisions on Thursday and also probably some WL. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:53 AM Flag
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3rd grade and all of the schools I spoke with said that they would not be following that date as they have not gotten contracts back yet so do not really know if there will be spots. We only interviewed at 1 school and the DOE was very honest and said that the only reason they are interviewing is just in case. but they would know better in 1 month. The other schools said that the would not even interview unless they have a spot. what grade are you applying for? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 03:16 PM Flag
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Not above poster, but that's depressing. I'm really hoping to get word of some sort this week. We too are applying only to one school (2nd grade) and confess that we've never actually asked the school when they'd let us know. But don't isaagny schools have to abide by the Feb 4 deadline? Even if it just means telling us we have to wait another month? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 03:19 PM Flag
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no. not according to the school that we interviewed with. Did they know for sure if they had a spot? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 03:47 PM Flag
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5th [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 03:19 PM Flag
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if they are isaagy, they have to follow the date. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 03:23 PM Flag
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Right, but they can WL you till they know if they have spots or, more honestly, wait to interview you till then. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 03:28 PM Flag
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actually they don't if they do not know if there will be spots. Did they tell you that they indeed did have an opening? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 03:48 PM Flag
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We are you; also had a DOA say interview was "just in case" and they will know more in a month! (I wonder if it was the same school. But most of them seem to have late Feb/early March reenroll dates). But I assume the school you interviewed with will at least formally WL you on Feb 4 if they like you, no? I was assuming that for us, anyway. Thought if they liked us, we might get a nice letter encouraging us to wait it out. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 03:34 PM Flag
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that is not the case with the school we interviewed with I asked. And FYI I went through this process last year also and never heard anything from any of the schools by mail. Called and was told over and over that they did not anticipate any spots(this was before the contracts were due back) and was told that the class was full (after the contracts were due back). Good luck. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 03:51 PM Flag
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That's pretty depressing. Do you mind my asking how many schools you contacted? And what grade? Did you ever try Parents League? Everyone says this year will be better with the economy prompting attrition, but who knows. Good luck to you too. It's such a stressful process for everyone, I can't imagine having to do it again next year. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 05:00 PM Flag
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any chance that that was at riverdale? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 04:05 PM Flag
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Not the op above, but yes we had a just in case interview there. I still thought we'd get a letter Feb 4th at least WL us. Am I wrong? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 04:50 PM Flag
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it's what i'm expecting too. at least i hope it's a WL. my feeling is, they only bother to bring in their strong candidates in an off-year. or am i wrong? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 05:20 PM Flag
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They told us they handpicked only a few to interview. Honestly, I wouldn't have bothered applying off year if I didn't think dc was pretty strong, since I knew we'd be competing for the 1 or 2 attrition spaces that might come up. GL to you. I hope we both hear something positive this week. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 05:27 PM Flag
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One of the schools we applied to said they would call those candidates who could handle their program (or some such). [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 05:28 PM Flag
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That sounds a bit pretentious! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 05:40 PM Flag
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Doesn't it? Haven't called us & dc clearly could handle it so it's hard to know what's going on. Maybe they are still waiting for clear number of spots or there is something they don't like about my essay. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 06:01 PM Flag
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They're probably waiting to get a better sense of spots. I wish someone who had (successfully) been through an off year process before would weigh in ... but my sense is the process can go long with 3 most likely points to hear. We asked one DOA when she typically calls people offyears from the WL. She said it could be anytime, but in her years of experience it was 1) in March after contracts are due; 2) in July just before the big lump sum is due; and 3) more rarely, as late as Labor Day when a family's plans suddenly change and they don't show. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 06:10 PM Flag
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ok, i get it. they interview a few who represent a cross-section, all worthy candidates who fit the school. interview for a double-ck of course. then it's just a matter of who drops out and they make their match. possibly what goes on? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 06:09 PM Flag
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I've wondered about that. I know they balance for gender. But does it go beyond that I wonder? Ethnicity? Geography? Hmm... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 06:13 PM Flag
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Just looked at Dalton's admission's material and it says notification for 2-8 will be sent out "not before Feb 4". That's very fuzzy, no? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 03:26 PM Flag
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I've noticed that kind of wording at other schools too. Isaagny seems clear that the 4th is the date, but who knows? FWIW 6th is an entry year (between 2-8) at many schools. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 03:40 PM Flag
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We interviewed for 4,5 or 6 and were told of openings and one school said they would not have interviewed unless they knew there would be. So, it must be different ith loer school off years. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 04:55 PM Flag
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This may well vary by school, but one school we applied to has a policy of interviewing *all* applicants - whether spots are anticipated or not. During our interview, they talked about Feb 4 in the context of "in case we have to WL dc." So for that one at least, I expect to hear *something* this week. Even if it's just WL. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 04:56 PM Flag
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Spence's website says classes 2 and 3 admissions mailed (February 4) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.04.09, 07:14 AM Flag
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If you applied there, best of luck to you. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.04.09, 07:22 AM Flag
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Thank you. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.04.09, 11:10 AM Flag
[ - ] Does anyone know the OVERALL Kindergarten acceptance rate at NYC privates? What percentage of applicants get into at least one school? 12 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
NY Schools 02.03.09, 11:24 AM Flag
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I read somewhere that overall it's about 2/3, but this includes every single independent school, so may not be helpful if you're thinking about the usual schools discussed on UB [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:33 AM Flag
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According to this http://www.nysun.com/new-york/more-students-took-private-school-admissions-test/76425/ 2008 article The number of children who took the test this year was 3,100, a 15% jump from last year, when 2,700 students took the tests, given by the Educational Records Bureau and known by the acronym ERB. The number of spots in private kindergartens is around 2,400, according to the Independent School Admission Association of Greater New York. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:41 AM Flag
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That actually isn't horrible odds, if you consider that at least 100 of the kids who took the ERBs end up at H, A, G&T or even their Gen Ed school by choice and that this doesn't include Catholic schools and a handful of non-ISAAGNY schools, your shot of getting a seat somewhere are pretty good. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:42 AM Flag
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Yes, but the 2400 spots includes schools like Philosophy Day School, Steiner, and a some other schools that are not going to give a mainstream education, and the 3100 includes all the sibs / legs who get in at a much higher %. So if you look at it that way, probably only 2/3 of the new families get spots. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 12:48 PM Flag
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Yeah, the odds seem good, so I wonder why so many posts about shut outs? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:47 AM Flag
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Well, if you only apply to Dalton, Trinity, HM and Brearley, a SO is certainly possible. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:48 AM Flag
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Because families cannot apply to all 50 private schools around the city. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:48 AM Flag
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But if you're realistic, you're not likely to get a SO unless there is a serious problem, more often with the parents than the kids. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:52 AM Flag
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OK, I get it. If one only applies to top or nearly-top schools, one increases their odds of a SO. Interesting. I haven't heard one parent at our Pre K mention a "safe" school! I guess if it's not gonna be a tt or close, they'd rather go public. Just for my own curiousity - what would be a "safe" school? I don't even know which ones would qualify. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 12:10 PM Flag
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I thought Mandell was relatively "safe" since it's new. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 01:03 PM Flag
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Any others? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 01:05 PM Flag
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maybe Claremont? not sure. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 05:36 PM Flag
[ - ] DCs who got in to UNIS last year: International? Bilingual? 7 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
New York City 02.03.09, 11:22 AM Flag
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yes and yes [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:23 AM Flag
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would you kindly post the ERB? (I am trying to figure out our chances) tia [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:26 AM Flag
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98 ERB [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:27 AM Flag
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Thanks! Are you happy there? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:30 AM Flag
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Yes, very. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:30 AM Flag
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^^ GL to you! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:31 AM Flag
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dc somewhat international and bilingual; 95 ERB; most of the dcs in dc's class bring some sort of international/multicultural aspect. very happy with the school so far. K is very academic, but that's exactly what we wanted. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 02:31 PM Flag
[ - ] I was in DC's class the other day when DC was about to take OLSAT. Teacher gave tester candy bar for another girl who I heard her explain was "shy." My DC had to take it right at the usual lunch time. My DC is such a candy whore, she would have done anything if someone dangled candy in front of her. 9 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
NY Schools 02.03.09, 11:20 AM Flag
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You are sickening! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:22 AM Flag
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The tester my dd had last year in K gave all the kids candy. It didn't help DD got a 60. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 12:33 PM Flag
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I wonder what the test results were for the kids that took it in public pre-K. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 12:45 PM Flag
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dd took in public preK. She got in the 60s. She may not be a savant, but has "superior" IQ [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 04:20 PM Flag
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what is considered good, or great? my dc took it the other day and i have no idea what to expect of the results. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 04:21 PM Flag
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Stop with the fake OLSAT testing posts. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 12:47 PM Flag
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op not fake. why think fake? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 04:19 PM Flag
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This is one of the many problems with this test - there is even more variety & unevenness in its administration than for the other tests - that said, your dc may have done fabulous without the candy incentive. GL. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 04:22 PM Flag
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I don't understand why people are so cavalier about adults "incentivizing" kids with candy. I'd be extremely pissed if a teacher did that with my kid. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 04:56 PM Flag
[ - ] Any parents of typical kids at Rivendell, or applied/applying? Considering it for db but I've only heard of SN kids experience. 8 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:20 AM Flag
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Isn't Rivendell where the elves live? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 06:02 PM Flag
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LOL! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 06:11 PM Flag
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Legolas is the new PTA president so I go to every meeting. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 06:41 PM Flag
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lol. best post of the night.. lol [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 06:42 PM Flag
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LOL. Thank you! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 06:49 PM Flag
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he was hot ... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 06:53 PM Flag
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What are SN kids? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 07:17 PM Flag
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special needs [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 07:19 PM Flag
[ - ] what are the pros/cons of amnio vs. cvs? i'll be 10 days short of 35 when baby #2 is born and ob/gyn said it is an option because my odds go 1 and 400 at 35. we scheduled the triplescreen next week. 10 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
Expecting 02.03.09, 11:11 AM Flag
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If you are doing the triplescreen would you even have time to do a CVS? Pros of CVS: You can do it earlier and have results. Cons of CVS: Some would argue that it is "riskier" but with a dr. that does them all the time, this is negligible. You are testing the placenta DNA, not the baby DNA. 98% or so of the time they are the same but there is a chance you may not get conclusive results. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:14 AM Flag
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ob said that i'm better off with amnio..but there is a risk of 1 in 400 of miscarriage. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:15 AM Flag
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Those are old statistics - I know at most NYC hospitals the real stats are much, much lower [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:17 AM Flag
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would you do it just for piece of mind? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:20 AM Flag
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Well I did a CVS and didn't even both with the triplescreen, so yes. I would not do the triplescreen and amnio if the ts results were good. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:21 AM Flag
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i did at age 37 and it put me so much more at ease! The procedure itself was a breeze. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:21 AM Flag
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oops I mean i did amnio [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:21 AM Flag
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"peace" of mind. to have peace in your mind. not to have a piece of mind. sheesh [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:22 AM Flag
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np: this is an excellent summary! so nice to see some accurate factual info on here. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:23 AM Flag
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OR: Thanks :) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:29 AM Flag
[ - ] i wish i were more attractive. i don't know why i feel this way. i love my husband and i know he thinks i'm pretty and i'd never be unfaithful. it'd just be nice to know that men are attracted to me. 40 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:09 AM Flag
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post a pic on craigslist in some city far from your own, and see how many guys send you pics of their dicks [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:17 AM Flag
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i think i am more interested in finding out what's wrong with me that i need to be the prettiest girl in the room. i'm too old for this and am ashamed that i think this is important [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:18 AM Flag
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i think there's an evolutionary aspect to it that is powerful. On some lizard-brained level, we want to know we are viable breeders, and when we get interest from the opposite sex our glands produce some sort of addictive hormone. You are not alone, and I think its probably worse for women who were especially hot when they were young. That's why they are the ones getting all the embarrassing "work" done. They can't live without those hormones. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:22 AM Flag
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thanks for the "real" answer. I was half expecting to be told off. i am really trying to understand this so i can stop it. first of all, it's not nice, hoping for other women's husbands to want you; second of all, it's a no win situation; the only ones who would are scoundrels anyway. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:25 AM Flag
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Scoundrels can be fun. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:30 AM Flag
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op - the men i'm wishing were attracted to me are exactly the type of men who'd never be unfaithful to their wives. the conundrum is that their faithfulness and good character is why i am attracted to them. i am really a loser. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:32 AM Flag
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Ok, this coming saturday, you and two other couples are going to have too much to drink and one of the DH's is going to seriously start coming on to you, and your DH and his wife both say "sure, who cares, we're all friends" would you do it? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:35 AM Flag
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op. no. for me it's all about knowing that the other man thinks i'm attractive. i take my vows seriously and for me, a sexual encounter requires a level of trust which i couldn't share with anyone other than my husband [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:37 AM Flag
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I still think you should post a snap on craigslist and see how many dick pics you get [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:41 AM Flag
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um. it wasn't funny the first time and it hasn't gotten funny. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:42 AM Flag
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well, at least you liked my faux-Darwinian spiel. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:44 AM Flag
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i like my comedy to be pretentious [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:49 AM Flag
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by the way, all this time I'm a guy, and i think you are all kinds of fine. I want you, I mean really want you, to have you to possess you, to have my way with over and over. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:51 AM Flag
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ok, thanks [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:52 AM Flag
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i guess that didn't do it [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:53 AM Flag
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i appreciate your trying to help, though. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:54 AM Flag
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you're a tough nut to crack [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:54 AM Flag
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i have a feeling if i knew you in real life, it'd be trouble b/c your posts are really making me smile. see, you are helping after all. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:57 AM Flag
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well, I am one of those guys who would never cheat on his wife, and I can tell you, as one of those guys, that I still find lots of women attractive as hell. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 12:02 PM Flag
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with any luck at all, you are the man i have a crush on and now i can go happily about knowing that you think i'm as attractive as i think you are. thanks. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 12:06 PM Flag
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wish i could help. confidence is all from within. perhaps a new outfit, haircut/blowdry would give you a lift. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:18 AM Flag
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On the flip side, it's very hard for attractive women to be constantly tested by temptation to be unfaithful. Sometimes it's better to be in a coccoon of marriage with no men being attracted to you. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:19 AM Flag
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np: hmmm. don't think so, but sounds comforting [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:20 AM Flag
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Why not agree? You don't think it's hard to be attractive and know that there are men lining up after you- especially when your marriage is not strong? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:26 AM Flag
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hard? only if i'm tempted to cheat. otherwise, it's just more fun. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:27 AM Flag
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even harder for attractive guys I bet [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:22 AM Flag
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op - my husband is the type of guy whom women only realize they want after they get to know him. he's not conventionally super-hot (although i think he's very handsome). however, once you get to know him and see how incredibly kind, smart, funny and interesting he is, he becomes really desireable. this is particularly troubling to me because women who work with him are aware of all these qualities. luckily for me, he is completely faithful and honorable. he'd never have the same stupid thoughts about women that i am having about men. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:28 AM Flag
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re your last line: you keep telling yourself that [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:46 AM Flag
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a dh here: Not to get to fortune cookie but some of the most beautiful women I have met have been some of the ugliest women I have known. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:29 AM Flag
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i think you mean "some of the most beautiful women I have known are some of the ugliest women I have met." [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:33 AM Flag
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Beauty may be skin deep, but ugly is to the bone. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:36 AM Flag
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That works too (actually that is a much more positive way of saying it) but I did mean it the way I wrote. I'm gonna have to go back to my tiny red typewriter... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:36 AM Flag
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i'm thinking that they may seem ugly when you just meet them, but are truly beautiful when you KNOW them... right? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:38 AM Flag
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NP: I read the other way around - Some very pretty chicks are assholes [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:48 AM Flag
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half empty vs half full, i guess. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 12:03 PM Flag
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that is what I meant in my original reply. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 01:52 PM Flag
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it's true both ways [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:49 AM Flag
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Sorry, got busy... if you are there: I don't really think anyone is ugly before I know them. It would be dishonest to suggest that I (or anyone) doesn't look at some people and find them more or less attractive. But "ugly" seems such an extreme word, I don't think it really crosses my mind at first meeting. But that said, there I can think back to several women I have known who were not "classically beautiful" when I met them but were downright HOT once I got to know them. -OR [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 01:39 PM Flag
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go out with the girls and forget your wedding ring [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.04.09, 06:30 AM Flag
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^ sorry got cut off. see how many guys hit on you (you dont have to do anything). that will be your answer. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.04.09, 06:31 AM Flag
[ - ] "During that period, Killefer and her husband, an economics professor, had two nannies to help care for their teenage son and daughter, and she had a personal assistant to run things when she was on the road, she told Harvard business students back then." really? teenagers? 12 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:09 AM Flag
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Would you leave your teenagers home alone when traveling on business? Especially early teens? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:17 AM Flag
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one nanny per kid, plus a PA though does seem like a lot [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:17 AM Flag
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likely that's not it [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:19 AM Flag
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Well, maybe it was one nanny at a time - one for daytimes, one for evenings or something. Because if someone addressing HBS students thinks her teens need a nanny apiece, that's just scary. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:21 AM Flag
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plus one to have an affair with the husband [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:24 AM Flag
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that depends on what's going on with the kids - 2 different schools, 2 different sets of activities, driving needed, nights, weekends, etc. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:27 AM Flag
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dad didn't travel [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:20 AM Flag
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wohms with travel often hire 2 pt nannies rather than one ft one. allows you to fill in bumps in the road and provides its own backup system. (if one is sick, they often coordinate and flop times for you, obviating the need for the last minute scramble) its a very sensible rlshp, works out to the same hours as a ft one, but has more flexibility [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:19 AM Flag
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what things did the personal asst run? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:23 AM Flag
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idk. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:58 AM Flag
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Who is Killefer? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:28 AM Flag
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I doubt she was on the road that much. She lived in Washington and ran Mckinsey's public sector practice. And hubby's a prof, so won't be traveling much. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:32 AM Flag
[ - ] So I have been following the private school admission process recommended the private school adviser on about.com. And I think it is going well. I wanted to take a look at the preschools early, as in dd does not start until Sept 2010, and at the end of the tour the director asked if I submitted the application yet. I said I thought it was rather early and she told me to give it to her directly as soon as possible. She said that she will keep it and when they begin the application process for 2010 she will call us to bring our dd in for a shadow day. I did not know what to say other then "thank you". And Thank you to the adviser on about.com. 6 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
Toddler 02.03.09, 11:07 AM Flag
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thank you, spamela [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:08 AM Flag
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lol [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:12 AM Flag
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I dont work for the guy. I don't even know him. I just thought he had great advice. He was nice and answered all my questions. I was just thinking others would benefit like I did. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:12 AM Flag
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board etiquette says that if you're caught spamming, denying it is wrong. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 12:01 PM Flag
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so spamela [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:24 AM Flag
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you sound like the same person who recommended a certain pediatrician the other day. how much do you get for writing these stiff little shorts? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:25 AM Flag
[ - ] Ladies - What did you use on your skin during pregnancy? Saw my derm a month ago (before I knew I was pregnant) and he gave me Finacia to use (Cat. B during pg). Since conception I have been breaking out like crazy, especially on my neck, jaw and forehead, like I never did before. He also told me to use cetaphil cleanser and moisturizer, which i am, but it is SO bad! Any tips? 11 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:06 AM Flag
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I used an acne cleanser from Sonia Dakar that I got at Barneys [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:12 AM Flag
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was it drying? My skin also has the fun trait of getting very dry and irritated when its not breaking out (sometimes when it is) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:13 AM Flag
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No, I really liked it. I also used a great oil free moisturizer from Barneys but can't remember the name [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:15 AM Flag
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Thanks. I'll try to get to Barney's this week. Curious - how was your skin before pg? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:16 AM Flag
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It was pretty good - occasional acne breakouts maybe 2x a year but that's it [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:17 AM Flag
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ditto for me during 1st pregnancy with my son. it's hormones. try topical antibiotic fr dermo. will prob hit your shoulders and back too. cetaphil is awesome - cream and wash. just be patient & don't pick. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:16 AM Flag
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cetaphil is crap. doesn't work at ALL. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:18 AM Flag
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thanks! I'll ask for a topical antibiotic if necessary - the thing he gave me is some sort of cream to clear it up, but it's not great [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:18 AM Flag
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as my ob said, you only have 9 months to make the healthiest baby, so no chemicals on your face. my skin was out of control with my DD but monthly facials helped. it totally was a pricey expense but for my sanity, it was worth it. right now, i am using avalon organics Q10 cleanser and it is doing wonders. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:18 AM Flag
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thanks. Seeing my ob this week (first appt) so will ask about the "Finacia" which derm said was fine during pg. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:19 AM Flag
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Clindicin 1% is safe while prego - you need a scrip. Works really well! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:37 AM Flag
[ - ] If my PSD just told me she'd spoken to the DOA at our first choice school who was "quite taken" with DS, would you read that to mean he's getting in? 12 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:04 AM Flag
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I would read that as a WL for sure. That the DOA would like to accept dc but is not sure there is a spot. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:06 AM Flag
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yes [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:07 AM Flag
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A definite maybe. As in, probably yes, but if, say (as a wise woman once told me), Obama's best friend's son suddenly is looking for a place in NY, your ds could end up #1 on the waitlist... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:07 AM Flag
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Is there only one single spot for a ds? Why should the OP's son be pushed over? Why not kick off another boy as opposed to OP's? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:12 AM Flag
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she's saying its all somewhat a game of chance [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:12 AM Flag
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How do you survive in the world? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:14 AM Flag
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I hope so. DOA at my FC made such positive comments about our ds right then and there. I hope that means he is in, too. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:09 AM Flag
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LOL. You just posted this on ybm... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:32 AM Flag
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What's ybm? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:42 AM Flag
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youbemom.com [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 12:44 PM Flag
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Huh? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 01:21 PM Flag
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YBM comes over here and snags posts they like pretty frequently. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 01:22 PM Flag
[ - ] how old were you when you bought your apt/house? 22 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:02 AM Flag
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34 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:05 AM Flag
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ditto [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 05:35 PM Flag
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I bought an apartment at 28 but rent now (sold it and spent the money on grad school) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:06 AM Flag
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29 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:06 AM Flag
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45 and still renting. I heart NY [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:07 AM Flag
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love it [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 05:11 PM Flag
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Bought on my 24th birthday [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:07 AM Flag
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first one? 25 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:07 AM Flag
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31 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:08 AM Flag
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My first home I bought was also a four unit rental I lived in. I was 27 yrs old. The rental was the only way I could boost my income up enough to qualify for a mortgage. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:10 AM Flag
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22. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 05:12 PM Flag
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27. dh bought his first place at 21. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 05:13 PM Flag
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^^^We own (apt in city and house on LI) now. Sold our apts in our hometown, moved to several different cities and rented for 6 years, then bought in Manhattan in '06. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 05:33 PM Flag
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29 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 05:24 PM Flag
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OP: ok so whoever is on right now, who owns and who rents? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 05:25 PM Flag
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own [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 05:25 PM Flag
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44 and haven't done it yet [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 05:28 PM Flag
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29 (country house), 32 (city) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 05:37 PM Flag
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interesting... bought the country house first? why? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 05:37 PM Flag
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Got a great deal and it was right after September 11. Was very happy with our rental in the city at the time and not ready to shell out the huge amount a condo would cost. But we were ready to make a real estate investment. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 05:41 PM Flag
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how did all you youngsters afford to buy? I'm one of 40+ who haven't and it's because we've never been able to save a downpayment. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 05:50 PM Flag
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We were the same way, and finally bought last year. We were saddled with college and medical school debt, and did not really make any decent income until after medical school and residency. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 05:51 PM Flag
[ - ] HM nursery. Will letters go out Feb 20 or in March? TIA 2 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
NY Schools 02.03.09, 10:58 AM Flag
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I think the 20th [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 12:58 PM Flag
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Anyone hear anything else about the 3s and 4s class at HM? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 08:33 PM Flag
[ - ] is an early June birthday still considered a "young" applicant? where's the cutoff, exactly? 9 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
NY Schools 02.03.09, 10:58 AM Flag
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no one knows anymore. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:00 AM Flag
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I know two early june birthdays. one got "too young". the other did fine. really depends on the school and on how DC does on ERB and playdate. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:13 AM Flag
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Early June is not too young to go to K at 5, but will be among the youngest children. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:01 AM Flag
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That was true for my ds. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:09 AM Flag
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we have a old mid-may ds in my dc's preschool class. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:02 AM Flag
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Here's my inexact analysis: There is no "exact" cutoff. For boys, June 1 the borderline. For girls, July 1 is borderline. There will always be exceptions, including young boys and girls even in July and August. Those exceptions tend to be either 1) connected (sibs or legacies) in which the school plans to take them but will make a determination if they will be too young the first year or too old the next but they WILL take them and this accounts for the occasional "old" May boy that starts K at 6; or 2) they are superstar kids, that despite being young are real standouts. If you have a May/June boy or a June/July girl who is neither connected or an absolute star, it can be a tough sell and they will be to "old" the following year. If you have July/Aug boy or an Aug girl, they have a good shot getting in the following year if everything else is good. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 12:47 PM Flag
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^^ but if you have a july/aug boy or an aug girl, they have a very good shot the following year if everything else is good. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 12:48 PM Flag
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np: I also think it has to do with the existing makeup of the class, esp. siblings. One DOA even mentioned this during our interview. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 12:51 PM Flag
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or: True. And I think the doas do make an effort to have all the birthmonths represented, but I think the summer months are often populated with connected kids and superstars. If they are going to take "young" kids, it's going to be the ones they have an obligation to take, or the ones that they think are going to best keep up despite being young. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 12:56 PM Flag
[ - ] are there one-day disposable contact lenses for astigmatism? i currently have the ones you dispose of after two weeks but would love to have the single use ones. tia. 8 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 10:57 AM Flag
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sorry I can't answer your question, but do you like your contacts? I tried them many years ago and they were weighted so if I tilted my head they would go out of focus. Are they better now? I am so sick of my glasses! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:01 AM Flag
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i have issues with lateral movement, so my lenses get dry quicker, which makes them uncomfortable. still,i'd like the option of not wearing glasses from time to time and think that daily wears would alleviate my discomfort. if it weren't for that, i'd say that my 2 week contacts are comfortable, so my advice to you is to give it another try. gl [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:05 AM Flag
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Thanks, this is helpful [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:13 AM Flag
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yw! now if only someone could tell me if one-day for astigmatism is an impossible dream or not [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:15 AM Flag
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yes. I had them prior to Lasik surgery. Dr Chaiken, upper east side. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:59 AM Flag
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Not dailies, but wear Toric lenes for astigmatism and they are pretty good. I just have generally dry eyes, so nothing is great, but these are 3 month disposables... Here's a link to a daily disposable toric I found: http://www.aclens.com/displaylens.asp?LensID=307 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 11:59 AM Flag
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No, they don't make the 1-day ones, as far as I know. I have the 2 weeks ones as well [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 12:05 PM Flag
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Acuvue has lenses for astigmatism you can either remove daily and change every 2 weeks or wear continuously up to 6 nights. I wear them continously and they're great. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 12:06 PM Flag
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