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[ - ] What kind of feedback does Riverdale give right after the interview? If not truly stellar, is it all over? Does is matter with whom you interview? We have no PSD and are so jealous of everyone here seeming to get feedback and guidance. 24 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
NY Schools 02.02.09, 12:01 PM Flag
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I got feedback but only b/c i had a very strong connection. fwiw dd did not get in. 92 erb. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:06 PM Flag
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where is your dc now? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 07:33 PM Flag
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I've heard SL is a straight-shooter who does not typically give feedback that leaves parents feeling warm and fuzzy. Heard the same from both those whose DCs were accepted and those who weren't. No idea at all if it makes a difference if SL gives the interview. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:13 PM Flag
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We interviewed with SL and it could not have been more positive. A good sign, then? I'm going crazy waiting. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 03:53 PM Flag
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not sure about this year, but we were given a VERY positive vibe coming out of the interview/playdate. didn't get in. i only pass along because the same thing happened to a friend -- made you feel like you were getting in, and didn't. we didn't fc it so not sure if that would have made a difference. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:20 PM Flag
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Last year, our Riverdale feedback was not specific enough to figure out acceptance or WL (something like "we really liked x child, think he's a great candidate"). We did not get any additional feedback from RCS that PSD shared before letters went out. Acceptance came and PSD was not surprised, so maybe she got something or heard something she did not share with us. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:41 PM Flag
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The only feedback we got was that they thought our Aug bday kid was ready for K. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 01:09 PM Flag
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we got some love, but i'm concerned DH and I screwed up by not asking "stellar" questions...didn't have any at all, really! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 03:41 PM Flag
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OP: us, too -- we didn't have great questions, DC was not interviewed by SL, interviewer was nice but certainly did not in any way rave (96ebr) -- do they want 98s and 99s this year? They probably have a lot more of those. I had thought we had a shot, but now I think it is no go. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 03:48 PM Flag
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yeah, what's up with riverdale this year on UB? i've been on this board for 2 years now (sadly) and i never heard about riv as much as this year....so who did you interview with? for k or another year? off-year here... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 04:36 PM Flag
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Not OP but off year for 3rd. How about you? Who did you interview with? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 04:48 PM Flag
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tim [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 05:16 PM Flag
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and? he seems like cool guy [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 05:19 PM Flag
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Us too. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 05:20 PM Flag
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who gets to see the DOA? all the people I know saw others [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 05:22 PM Flag
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We saw DOA. But from all I've heard, it makes no difference who you see. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 05:26 PM Flag
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do they give immediate feedback? Positive a la Saint Ann's or more understated, or simply more reliable? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 05:35 PM Flag
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For us, DC went in first and spent 1/2 hr with DOA. Then we were called up while DC waited in supervised waiting area. DC's interview had gone well, and rest of app was good, so feedback was glowing. But who knows what that means? From what I read on this board, you have to take it all with a grain of salt. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 05:40 PM Flag
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as in, you kid is so amazing, brilliant, focused, etc? what were erb's? and you mean the immediate feedback, yes? i felt DC's interview went well, or certainly not badly, but feedback felt a little subdued -- ah well [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 05:51 PM Flag
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I do mean the immediate feedback, yes (we don't have connected PSD, so that's all we've got). And while those weren't the exact words, it was glowing feedback given in context of recapping dc's interview for us. Dc is very verbal, completely at ease around new adults, so that probably helped. Top ERBs, but that didn't even come up. And everything I just said describes a lot of applicants. I've got fingers crossed, but realize anything can happen. I wouldn't worry too much about subdued feedback; different interviewers probably have different styles. What matters is what happens in committee. GL to you! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 06:36 PM Flag
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Don't know if it makes a difference but the new headmaster is very impressive. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 07:49 PM Flag
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Until you read his blog and discover he cannot write a grammatical, coherent sentence. That was rather off-putting. Someone should really edit that for him. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 08:18 PM Flag
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The is gossip based so take it fwiw, but I'd always heard Riverdale was one of the few schools where the focus is on DC, not you. If they want DC, your lack of Qs won't matter. What seems more worrisome is the unreliable feedback described by posters above - where people leave feeling the love, but then don't get in. That's what I'm worried about. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 07:17 PM Flag
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at this point i'm so jaded, unless they hand me a contract, i'm not taking anything as a given. i mean i've applied to saint ann's TWICE, so i know the drill! :-) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 02:51 PM Flag
[ - ] MD rec,ing I try YAZ as a mood leveler. ANyone on it and NOT gain weight? Are you less cranky and still skinny? Many TIA!! 4 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:00 PM Flag
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Know nothing about it but in general I’d rather be fat and happy than skinny and depressed. Maybe you should try working out in conjunction with it and kill two bird with one stone [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:07 PM Flag
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i agree, i am thin as a rail now but not very happy! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 01:16 PM Flag
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I actually lost a couple lbs in the first two months, but they came back in months 3 - 4. But no extra lbs. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:50 PM Flag
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I'm on it. No difference in weight. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 01:24 PM Flag
[ - ] Please bare with me - I need advice, but don't want to out myself. I have 2 dc's. #1 is smart, but clearly not a genius. We applied to privates and g&t, but she ended up in a pretty good public. When all is said and done, she's happy there. She is in 2nd grade currently. Now, #2 has a great shot to get into Hunter. This presents a serious dilemma for us. #2 is bright and highly competitive. He understands very well that he is smart, and is being "tested" for "smart schools". His sister already feels a certain level of resentment and jealosy. That's another story. Here's the question: what would you do? Put #2 in the same public, keep the kids together, they'll have a better relationship? Put #2 in Hunter (provided he gets in, but this is likely) and give him this great opportunity - but how do I handle #1? What do I tell her? Advice, please. Thanks. 153 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
Preschool/Kids 02.02.09, 12:00 PM Flag
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I would send DS to H. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:02 PM Flag
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Thanks. What do I tell #1? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:06 PM Flag
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You sure are confident that Hunter wants your DS. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:08 PM Flag
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Well I have to be prepared. He has excellent scores and rnd2 went well - so the chances are good, and we have to decide what to do before we find out for sure. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:16 PM Flag
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LMAO. Like they gave you a private debrief of how round 2 went. By the way, ALL the kids at round 2 have "excellent scores"--not that it matters. Score isn't considered once kid gets to round two. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:22 PM Flag
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Of course they didn't - ds told me what they asked and did, and it sounds like he did well and had a good time. This is NOT the point by the way. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:23 PM Flag
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Alrighty, then. He's in. Congrats! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:25 PM Flag
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Ugh. Get over this please. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:25 PM Flag
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Hey, you're the one who mentioned the "great shot", lady. You're delusional, and you're being called on it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:30 PM Flag
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can you people just back off? who cares if she thinks she's in and she's not. she's tryign to figure something out. help her or don't, but get off her back. why does it make you angry if someone thinks their kid has a good shot? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 04:20 PM Flag
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"Now, #2 has a great shot to get into Hunter" isn't a statement of any sort of fact. If she was SO concerned about her dd's feelings, she wouldn't have made this into a "family process" (bizarre) AND she would have posted in general terms here--rather than going on and on about her dc and his great shot at Hunter (which exists solely in her mind). [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 04:24 PM Flag
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and that bothers you why? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 04:28 PM Flag
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She's here to brag about her son (and his "great shot" at Hunter) under the guise of being so very concerned about her dd's psychological wellbeing (though she's the one who's making things difficult for the girl). [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 04:32 PM Flag
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oh that's just terrible! seriously, when something like that makes you really angry, there's something wrong inside of you that only you can fix. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 05:03 PM Flag
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np. i have to agree with other posters. whatever your ds did or didn't tell you about doing well has no bearing on whether her will get in or not. congrats to you for making it to round 2, but ds has no better shot than any other dc who did. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 01:04 PM Flag
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You are right. I think everyone after round 2 has a very good shot - imagine the odds that these kids beat to make it to rnd 2. It is not unreasonable to start thinking about our options at this stage. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 01:10 PM Flag
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Scores may not be considered but extremely high score usually means extremely high ability. It's pretty hard to fail the onsite if the child is in 99.9 percentile. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:37 PM Flag
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Lots of 99+ kids are dinged. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:46 PM Flag
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Yup. Last year, of the 4 I know who went, 2 98s got in, 2 99s dinged. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 04:29 PM Flag
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Hunter, of course. What are you going to when they apply to college and one gets into Harvard and the other one gets into SUNY Buffalo? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:04 PM Flag
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Right. At that point #1 they will be an adult and should hopefully be able to handle this. What do I do now? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:08 PM Flag
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My point is that you should be consistent. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:13 PM Flag
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I think this is really hard but in the end I think you have to treat them as individuals. You always have to remember that super smart is just one good way to be. Your dd is special in her own ways and if she knows from you that they are just as important as being smart you're going to be fine. I'm not saying to compare them, just that she is good too. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:05 PM Flag
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Of course she is, and she knows she is special and loved, etc etc. I just don't want her to resent her brother or to think that she is less smart. This is very hard on me. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:15 PM Flag
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But maybe she is less smart; you seem to be implying that she is. The thing is it doesn't matter, smart is one attribute among many others which are just as important. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:34 PM Flag
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She is probably less intelligent, but I hate to even write this. This is not the point!! She has plenty going for her and she certainly shouldn't feel inferior. So the point is, how do I avoid her feeling inferior if I do place #2 at Hunter. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:36 PM Flag
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Don't assume she will feel inferior. Don't act as if she is inferior. Don't act as if he is better. The simple answer is if you believe it so will she. There is way too much emphasis but on smarts and tests--they really aren't everything (and they are what I have). [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:43 PM Flag
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She could feel even more inferior if you send ds to the same school. I had a super-smart younger brother and always heard teachers saying, "you think she's smart, just wait until you have her brother!" At least at another school there would be less direct comparison. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 05:36 PM Flag
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You can't sacrifice #2 to please #1's jealousy if another school is best for #2. I never understand parents who sacrifice one dc for another. Do you think that will improve their rel'p? What is #2 is bored at #1's school? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:05 PM Flag
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Well, I was thinking that #2 would be just as happy at any school. The public school is pretty good, and #1 is happy there. I don't view it as a sacrifice, per se. #2 will have great options even in/after public school. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:11 PM Flag
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If #1's school can accommodate #2 just fine, then do it. For your sake, not to appease #1 to be clear. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:26 PM Flag
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not necessarily true. kids who are too far above catch some flak from certain teachers, believe it or not. In Japan there is some expression for that. I have 3 dcs and am familiar with your dilemma, believe me, if dc #2 gets into H, then H is the right choice. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 08:30 PM Flag
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How does a 4 yo understand that he is being tested for smart schools, if an adult has not informed him of same? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:06 PM Flag
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He hangs around us and overhears adult conversations. He saw school applications. His sister was the one who introduced the term "tested" - we never did. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:10 PM Flag
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you have made a big mistake which I am sure is evident in other ways you parent these children. You should not be having these adult conversations in front of them, nor should you be making your dilemma apparent to them. It is clear that you have not managed well the potential for sibling rivalry/discord. Nor have you protected either of your dcs from the vagaries of this process. I think you need to do damage control, and get off of the ego trip that your #2 is affording you. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:17 PM Flag
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OR here, and ITA. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:18 PM Flag
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another OR: agree! what a mess. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:22 PM Flag
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tritto. yikes! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:24 PM Flag
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Quadritto. If you hear hysterical screaming and wailing from afar on the day the Hunter letters him mailboxes, you'll know it's OP. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:27 PM Flag
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Quintitto (is that a word? ;-) ). My DS goes to H and has no clue why he goes to that school versus any other. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 06:02 PM Flag
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Mine either. That said, I think that if you have a child who gets into Hunter, it would be quite unfair to tthat child to put him in your general public. It matters for these kids who they are surrounded with, in terms of intellectual challenge/stimulation. That seems a bit hit to take just to satisfy a problem that you may, in fact, be creating (I'm not trying to be mean, just not sure why kids should be so conscious about all this). [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 06:09 PM Flag
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Sextetto. she messed up big time. sounds so immature. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 07:04 PM Flag
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She won't actually have a "dilemma" unless her dc is accepted. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:24 PM Flag
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she does have a dilemma. she has to decide how to manage a situation she has created between her 2 dcs. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:26 PM Flag
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Yes. One very fucked up dynamic in that home. You KNOW she blathers on to the boy about how bright he is and that Hunter is for super smart kids like him. Otherwise, the girl would never have picked up on any of this. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:32 PM Flag
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I tell both my children that they are special and bright, etc. Dd knows that Hunter is for "smart kids", and now ds does too. Ds picks up on everything, he is very perceptive. He asks a lot of direct questions and we don't lie to them as a rule (although we have on occasion of course). [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:35 PM Flag
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you are nappropriate. you should never have told dd what you did. I too have a very smart dc. did everything I could to avoid giving that sort of detail about the schools. he is as inquisitive as they get, and he asks all kinds of things about what he notices. but in you case, I agree with others. you have been too free in your discussing of this in front of or to your dcs. It is a mistake. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:42 PM Flag
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OK maybe there's a grain of truth in this. Maybe we did make a mistake. Still, I don't see how we could have hidden all the applications and the rest of the process from dd. The question is - what do we do now? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:45 PM Flag
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Worry about that AFTER your son is accepted to Hunter. No use fretting about it now. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:52 PM Flag
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or from above. that is actually not very helpful. op has injected too much information about the process in her dcs' minds, and that does have to be contained and managed. the issue of whether her ds gets into hunter is not really the issue at hand as I see it. she has far bigger problems on the table. the problem is that she cannot undo what she has done. she needs to minimize it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 01:04 PM Flag
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^^^perhaps she told so much to her dd because she wants to send ds to hunter and wanted to make her dd deal with it upfront, long before she has an acceptance in hand. she now needs to take the kids out of the "family process" and deal as the parent in the equation. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 01:07 PM Flag
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True. But she's also wringing her hands about what to do IF her son gets into Hunter--which is pointless given that the odds better than he WON'T. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 01:12 PM Flag
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honey, she already put it to her dd. she has already decided, and either way, the dd has been damaged, so it won't matter. on some level, she knows this. that may be why she did it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 01:15 PM Flag
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I totally agree. The mother should be ashamed of herself. Her daughter is going to have a serious complex that was completely unnecessary. I'm actually sickened by this post. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 01:32 PM Flag
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you can still sit down with youyr family and explain things rationally and lovingly so that no one feels like there are secrets, and fragmented clues to conversations. take control of the situation you created, and turn it into harmony [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 07:06 PM Flag
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NP: oh, man. this is a major mistake. you really don't want to tell small children that they're "smart" or "bright." not only is there no need but it introduces a comparison kind of thing, both in your family and with other children. FYI my 99+SB-scoring DC was dinged at round 2 H last year--remember they are taking 24 girls and 24 boys, that's it--I too felt like there was a very very good chance after hearing about how round 2 went for DC; DC told me about reading for one of the observers etc. DC now in a great zoned public that we chose over district G&T. we never tell her she's "smart" but she does stand out at school. for the sake of your family, and for your kids' sake, think hard about how you talk about this stuff in front of and with them. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 01:13 PM Flag
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ITA. It is also obvious that this mother favors her son, and brags about him in front of the daughter. I feel sick for that poor little girl. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 01:36 PM Flag
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I also agree. You are 1) counting the chickens before they hatch. 2) Completely mishandled the school situation. How do little kids know what kind of schoold they go to and whether one is better than another? They don't and they pick this up from their parents. 3) Going to have one disappointed kid if he doesn't get in. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 04:57 AM Flag
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the term "tested" is not the problem -- the term "smart schools" is -- why would you ever have even used that term, even in adult conversations? you have handled this badly so far. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 04:27 AM Flag
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I would send to Hunter and not make it about intelligence. Just talk about different schools work for some kids. That said, your 2nd grader will know the deal but isn't that just life? why should your other dc not live up to his potential. i was in this situation with my dc's. in the end my 99 dd did not get into H. just wait and see. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:10 PM Flag
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That's the thing - dd will know exactly what's going on. She knows she didn't get into H, and now if her brother does I don't want her to develop complexes, etc. How can I not make it about intelligence if she clearly understands what "gifted and talented" means? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:14 PM Flag
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how does she know she applied there? you shouldn't have told her. i guess you will have to say that he is gifted. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:15 PM Flag
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She asked - she was very curious about the whole application process for ds. We told her she went through the same thing after she started saying "how come I didn't do this". She always wants to make sure she's getting equal treatment. Like I said before, there are some issues in their relationship. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:17 PM Flag
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catering to her insecurities isn't going to solve the problem and it's horribly unfair to your younger child. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:19 PM Flag
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she isn't catering to the older dc's insecurities. she is causing them. she really needs to look at how she is handling this. I have always wondered how some people end up as adults who hate their siblings. well, here is an example of a parent with no empathy whatsoever for children or sibling relationship building. it is sad. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:21 PM Flag
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OK, this hurt. What exactly am I doing that's causing #1's insecurities? Who said she has insecurities? A lot of siblings have issues, and my #2 is a handful, trust me. He requires a lot of patience, which dd doesn't always have. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:32 PM Flag
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You should have only said that you are applying to different schools and that you will choose the best fit. any discussion of smarts or test scores or differences between your dcs should not be on the table at this point. It is inappropriate, and your dd is being made to cope with all kinds of feelings when it is unnecessary. If you had put ds at hunter and down the road the issue of different schools were to come up, you could have dealt with it. but here, you just gave too much info unnecessarily which makes me wonder if you don't enjoy making your dd feel bad. perhaps you are partial to your ds, or more competitive with your dd? who knows? but this was all unnecessary at this point. so yes, you caused this. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:46 PM Flag
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That is ridiculously harsh. You seem to be assuming all kinds of things about the OP that you know nothing about. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:47 PM Flag
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just read through this thread. it is apparent that she does not have a protective stance toward her dcs. she likes having the "truth" hanging out there for the kids to just deal with. she really needs to look at her behavior and feelings, and stop putting them out there for her dcs to digest. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:55 PM Flag
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It is not "apparent" in the least. Maybe she does, maybe she doesn't. There's nowhere near enough information to say. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 01:11 PM Flag
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ITA. And actually the fact that she is even wondering what to do if her son does get into Hunter shows a form of protection for her daughter. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 04:16 PM Flag
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no wonder she wants to make sure she is getting the same treatment. the parents here have serious issues which they are foisting on their poor kids. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:20 PM Flag
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OP - and what are our issues? Would you please enlighten? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:21 PM Flag
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I have posted elsewhere in this thread. feel free to read. you have no sense of what is appropriate for your dcs, and have thus created this problem, which probably does not stop with the issue of hunter. you might try a parenting class, a book or therapy. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:23 PM Flag
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i know it's too late but you should have lied to spare her feelings and prepare for this. you could have said you didn't know about H when she was applying. now you have to just deal b/c you sound like the kind of person that will let her know if ds gets into H regardless of what you decide. right? won't they overhear your debate? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:21 PM Flag
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That's exactly the point - DH and I decided to address this issue now. If we decide to place ds into public we will probably just lie to dd that he didn't get in to spare her feelings. Obviously we won't tell her that he got in but we're putting him in her school regardless so she doesn't feel inferior? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:25 PM Flag
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because OP has no sense of what is appropriate for young dcs to know. she is boundaryless and I am sure it shows up in all kinds of ways in this household. blech. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:19 PM Flag
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Is this all one insane person haranguing the OP? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:49 PM Flag
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No. I think there are several of us "insane" people. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 01:21 PM Flag
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yup, I'm another one. couldn't just lurk this time. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 01:22 PM Flag
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Did she make round 2? If so, she's at least in the top 3% (wasn't the cutoff 97 back when she applied?), so she's no dummy. If she didn't make round 2, I don't know why she'd have any idea about what Hunter is at all (actually, I have a first grader who went to round 2, and I doubt she has much of an idea about the purpose of Hunter). [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:21 PM Flag
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She did not make round 2. We told her that she applied after she pestered us about it. She knows what Hunter is, although she does not remember the application process. I couldn't have told her that we didn't apply her - she would have been upset that we applied her brother and not her, etc etc. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:28 PM Flag
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WHY DID YOU TELL HER THAT YOU APPLIED FOR HER BROTHER!?!? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:34 PM Flag
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She saw all the applications, she saw us going to playdates, interviews, open houses. She was very interested in the process. I thought involving her would be good - she got to "help out", she felt important and grown-up. Are you suggesting we should have shut her out of this pretty important family process? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:38 PM Flag
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hate to say it but you are an idiot! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:48 PM Flag
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ITA. Playdates and interviews are held during hours a 2nd grader would be in school. "Family process"? WTF? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:51 PM Flag
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np. Not ours. Several of dc's school visits were on weekends, including the Hunter playdate. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.04.09, 07:17 AM Flag
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Doesn't the child go to school? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:48 PM Flag
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Oh my god. You "involved" DD in the "important family process" of applying for G&T schools for DS?! I'm a NP, but I have to chime in here. I really think you need to take steps to understand the environment you're creating. You could even call the tester who did DS's stanford binet test and ask for an appointment, then tell the psych what you've told us here and ask for advice in how to handle. REALLY not good for your kids. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 01:18 PM Flag
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Sorry but you overshare with your dd. She should not have seen the applications, and playdates are during the day when she is in school. Water under the bridge now but it is your fault. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 01:19 PM Flag
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That is kooky. Kids actually going through process themselves barely have to know what it is -- you can present it in such a low-key way, or be an uptight, overbearing maniac and make an application to K a "family process." YUCK. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 04:20 AM Flag
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APPLY HER??? APPLY HER???? I call hoax on this whole damn thread. There is NO ONE this stupid who has a dc who made hunter round 2. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 04:19 PM Flag
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LMAO! I know. HATE when people write that. Same crowd that uses "gifted" as in "I gifted her a Starbucks card". [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 04:30 PM Flag
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Go for Hunter. Does your #1 have a hobby she'd like to explore? (i.e. ballet, soccer, art). If you have some extra money lying around, maybe sign her up for a class? If she finds a new talent that would boost up her confidence and decrease jealously. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:12 PM Flag
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She is taking piano lessons and she's good with crafts (klutz kits, etc). She is obviously a lot older that ds and she usually points out how she knows more, can do more, etc etc... I really don't think that adding another activity would help here. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:20 PM Flag
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I'd like to know why your dc has "a great shot to get into Hunter" given than all the round 2ers are technically gifted (and nobody knows exactly what combination of traits/birthdate/race they're looking for on playdate). [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:14 PM Flag
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exactly. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:16 PM Flag
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OK. Everyone who went through rnd 2 has a great shot, in my book. Ds told me what they did and it sounds like he did well and had a good time. Of course this is not a guarantee, but DH and I decided we need to discuss this issue now, before we get the acceptance (or rejection). [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:22 PM Flag
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You didn't pass statistics, did you? There are 180 kids. There are 48 spots. Better shot than tt private, but far from a "great shot" as the vast majority will be rejected. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:29 PM Flag
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you're a liar. you work for cnet and you've made this whole thing up. and you're not very bright. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 04:27 PM Flag
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Send kid to Hunter and then- READ SIBLINGS WITHOUT RIVALRY!!!! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:16 PM Flag
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Yep, I need this book. Who's the author? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:18 PM Flag
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Adele Faber and Elaine Mazlish. It makes so much sense and it has helped us tremendously. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:20 PM Flag
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Thank you. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:28 PM Flag
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Or, for a different perspective, watch the first few seasons of Malcolm In The Middle [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 06:09 PM Flag
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I'm in a similar boat, one dc at Anderson and the other has a shot at Hunter and I'm going to choose Anderson(if I have the choice) even though I think Hunter would be a better fit. Older dc is not competitive but it is a lifestyle choice just so much easier to have them both at the same school. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:16 PM Flag
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yes but H or A is different than a regular pubic IMO. also the publics are destined to get worse in this economy so you should put dc in the best one you can. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:18 PM Flag
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True, and is putting the cart before the horse, who knows what are choices will be in the end [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:22 PM Flag
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OP - if the choice was between A and H I would have put #2 in A for sure, end of story. But this is regular public. Good luck to you! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:30 PM Flag
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This board is nuts. Send both dc to same school. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:22 PM Flag
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you are wrong. holding one kid back because of the other- that is a SURE WAY to breed resentment. Treat both kids like the individuals they are- you will fail miserably if you try to teach kids that everything needs to be equal and fair all the time because that ain't the way the world works [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:26 PM Flag
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Of course. These women are insane. They should go to the same school. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:50 PM Flag
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I don't understand why everyone thinks OP is a horrible parent. Even if she had hidden the issue from her children now, eventually #1 would realize that #2 was going to a school for g&t (like when #2 eventually starts going and she mentions it to her friends), and ask why she couldn't go to. It's not like she would have stayed ignorant of this forever... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:33 PM Flag
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OP - Thank you!! Exactly. In my experience, there's always more resentment if they find out you've been hiding something all along. Even if we haven't been "hiding", but simply not telling, #1 would perceive it as "hiding". In the end she'd find out anyway for sure, and there would be more issues. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:41 PM Flag
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You know what. This is not at all about OP as a parent. Everyone is lashing out at her because they're pissed she thinks her kid has a good shot at Hunter. I'm reading this thread and shaking my head because people are tearing her from limb to limb as a parent when really it's all about their own issues about the school process. It's shit like this that makes me glad we left the City. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:47 PM Flag
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Well, I don't know that it's the City, but I have had exactly the same reaction to this thread. There are some awful people here. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:51 PM Flag
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You're right, it was unfair of me to make a blanket statement about the City. It's a certain kind of parent, period. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:59 PM Flag
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or: LOL, I didn't realize that was the motivation behind their remarks. Anyway, my advice would just be to make #1 feel as confident as possible in her own way. You mentioned piano lessons so make sure to go to those recitals! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:51 PM Flag
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OP - thank you. Of course you are right - I am not on here regularly and I guess I just forgot how insane this place is. Maybe I shouldn't have said "ds has a great shot" or mentioned the name of the school at all, and the same people would give me reasonable advice. Now they all just hate my guts. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:56 PM Flag
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No. That's not it. It's her arrogance. My dc went to round 2 (with a 99+ SB), and was ultimately dinged. Wasn't our fc, but it was up there. Never would have thought my dc had an especially "good shot" because she enjoyed the playdate. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 01:01 PM Flag
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np: Okay, so the OP was optimistic about her younger child's chances and called it a "good shot" instead of a "fair shot" or a "decent shot" or whatever other nuances of "shot" come with a 99+ SB. I realize it is proportional to a CRIMINAL OFFENSE but can you all STFU and stop acting like HARPIES? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 01:06 PM Flag
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Thank you. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 01:11 PM Flag
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A 99+ has no better shot than a kid who just made cutoff, actually. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 01:15 PM Flag
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bare with you? sorry, but i don't get naked with strangers. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:41 PM Flag
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lol. i know, sooo snarky, but "bare with me"? "jealosy"? i guess dad is the bright half of this gene pool! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 01:06 PM Flag
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Must be Stephen Hawking to make up for OP's contribution. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 01:16 PM Flag
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I am baring it all for you, honey. Signed, DH. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 04:20 PM Flag
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I think you should put your ds in the best school for him. If your daughter wants to know why he is going to a different school, you just say that you feel this school is better for him, her school is better for her. There should be no reason to get into who is smarter. If your daughter already has issues with feeling that ds is smarter than her, then you should go speak to a psychologist on how to work on that issue/dynamic. You can probably do better in that area than you are right now. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 01:04 PM Flag
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Send Ds to the best school for him. If that is hunter or Nest or whatever. If your dd wants to know why, you explain that it is the best school for him. You also should talk to a psychologist about how to handle the issues that are cleary arising between you/your dd/your ds regarding her feeling that she is not as smart etc. I think this will serve you well in the future. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 01:07 PM Flag
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ITA. It may also help to emphasize what your dd is really good at...art, music, etc. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 01:12 PM Flag
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This was me and my sister (but reverse the birth order). I think you have to do what is best for each child. My sister and I never went to the same school and truthfully we weren't close growing up. I honestly don't think having us at the same school would have changed that (we are 3 years apart). Put your dcs in the schools that are best for them as individuals. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 01:11 PM Flag
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OP - thank you. How did you feel about your sister? Were you competitive? Was there any resentment? How did your parents handle it? I have a feeling these kids will never be close as adults and it makes me so sad. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 01:19 PM Flag
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Why would you have such a feeling now? My kids are the same age and I certainly hope they will be very close, even if they don't go to the same school (also applying for #2 now). Sounds like you are setting them up, sorry. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 01:22 PM Flag
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Some days they play great together, but some days they drive each other nuts. Sometimes I feel #2 is taunting #1 on purpose, and she just snaps and cries that she hates him etc etc... I really hope they find a balance and get along great when they get older. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 01:34 PM Flag
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NP: This was me and my brothers, too. Thirty years later, it still comes up. We're all mostly over it now, but it was a sore spot for a long time. [One difference is that I went to an expensive private school, so there was a sense of extra resources being allocated to me.] That said, it was what was best for me at the time. If you prioritize family harmony over individual needs, send him to public. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 06:08 PM Flag
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Hunter if he gets in, if you think it's the best place for him, and if it's not a otal pain to have them at 2 different schools. Lots of families have one kid at Hunter and one not (I knoe several families like this). You should be directing this question to those families and asking them how they managed this issue. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 01:21 PM Flag
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np: My dc goes to school with two kids that have siblings at Hunter (one is a twin actually!), we are in upper elementary now and the kids don't care. It is a PITA for the parents to deal with 2 schools. The funny thing is that I am friend with one of the moms, asked her if the dc in 'regular' school is resentful, and she actually said the Hunter one is, because of having to take bus to school every day, and not having nearly as many playdates (kids much more spread apart) as the sibling. Neither family is regretting the decision, and it is several years down the road now. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 01:25 PM Flag
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Thank you, this is a very interesting perspective. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 01:30 PM Flag
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go for hunter. maybe you're not giving your dd much credit. she might be more flexible and mature than you think, if she isn't and he gets in than show her extra attention show her that she's just as special. don't tell her SHOW her. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 04:39 PM Flag
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It's just a matter of what you prioritize. Having them at different schools will affect their relationship -- I speak from personal experience. On the other hand, if the public school isn't the right environment for your ds, it will have other effects on him. Do you want him to be closer to his peers? He's more likely to get that at Hunter. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 06:02 PM Flag
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i think you made WAY too big a deal about hunter being the "smart school" and that was not fair to either of your kids. you need to just portray it as different schools are suited for different people, and bec of #2's interests in x, y, or z we think this school will be better. not fair to #1 to make her feel less smart, not fair to #2 to make him feel superior. you are creating the jealousy and resentment. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 06:05 PM Flag
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it is your issue. how does a 4 year old dc know he is applying to a "smart" school unless you reinforced that (or told him that). if you are going to treat #1 like she is not as smart you will have a long term issue. Don't compare kids and you will not have an issue - send DS to best school for him and don't favor. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 06:16 PM Flag
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why did you have to tell him he was smart, getting tested for smart school, etc? this is your fault. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 07:02 PM Flag
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ITA - IT'S NOT FAIR TO THE KIDS WHEN THE ADULTS DISCUSS THE SCHOOL PROCESS IN FRONT OF THEM. Sorry to shout, but my god. Just control yourself and don't bring it up in front of them. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 07:22 PM Flag
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Barack Obama just become The President of the United States after going to Columbia and Harvard Law School. His brother just got arrested in Keyna for selling marijuana. Send your son to Hunter. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 07:50 PM Flag
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lol [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 07:52 PM Flag
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apparently, your daughter takes after you ... it's "bear with me" [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 07:56 PM Flag
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I am afraid you have created a situation with long lasting ramifications for your daugther -- feelings of insecurity, shame, not being good enough, smart enough, etc. What happens when your DS starts teasing her about it. It's bound to happen. You're son will fare just fine in the public school. FWIW, I went to a private school and my younger sister didn't. It took a long time for her to resolve her feelings. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 08:00 PM Flag
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what are you? a communist? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 08:04 PM Flag
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Please, we are talking elementary school. THis is not college and mom has botched things up enough and needs to rectify things for her daugther. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 08:15 PM Flag
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Also: it's "jealousy" [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 05:58 AM Flag
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HEY LISTEN WHEN YOUR CHILD GETS INTO HUNTER PLASE POST ON THE SITE AND MAKE ALL THESE HORRIBLE PEOPLE FEEL REALLY SILLY FOR BEING SO TERRIBLE TO YOU. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.03.09, 02:00 PM Flag
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Ok--we had a similar situation in reverse. Older dc at Anderson, younger in good gen ed. We were disappointed that younger did not get in to A, but, in our experience, the gen ed has been great. Younger dc is a stronger reader and writer than older dc, who is stronger in math. Teachers at gen ed have been just as good, and all in all the experience has not been very different. Testing kids at 4 does not mean very much! Maybe Hunter is much more accelerated than A, but in our situation, the difference has not been as big as we thought. We think the reading and writing curriculum in the gen ed is stronger. Math at A is stornger. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.04.09, 06:35 AM Flag
[ - ] Do most people get WL'ed as a polite no? Or do schools hand out rejection letters to most people? 7 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
NY Schools 02.02.09, 12:00 PM Flag
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I would say taht many schools use rejection letters if they can but there are many many more waitlist then is realistic. Most schools have two waitlists: one polite and one real. Some schools even tell you which one you are on. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:07 PM Flag
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they give rejection. my dc got off the WL at our FC. work the WL. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:07 PM Flag
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what does it mean to work the WL ? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:15 PM Flag
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get on the phone and find out where you are on the list. be persistent, without being obnoxious or crazy. it can work. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:17 PM Flag
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Check with your PSD also - sometimes she will get a better picturr of where you really stand on the WLS and which one is most likely to happen for you. IMO, the challenge is that during that week waiting period, your PSD is really only working the WLs for parents who have a real chance of getting in. So, if your PSD is not working your WLs - she may not think you'll move on any. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:53 PM Flag
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My dc got acceptances, wls and outright rejections. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:17 PM Flag
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there are different levels of "w/l" those high up have a shot. those low down do not, and the w/l is akin to a polite no. the kid is fine, nothing significantly wrong, make reapply one day in the future, but no shot currently. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:28 PM Flag
[ - ] Do you have to register in advance for PS6 or can your kid just show up? 5 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
New York City 02.02.09, 11:59 AM Flag
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What do you think? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:03 PM Flag
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I thought you can show up (after providing docs that you live where you say you live) but there is no advance application necessary. Don't be so snarky. We just moved to NYC from Europe. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:10 PM Flag
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Call PS6 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:15 PM Flag
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it is always better to register. Think about it from the school's perspective -- they hire 4 teachers for K, thinking they have 80 kids, and on day one 200 kids show up!!! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:15 PM Flag
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If you live in the zone, register now. You never know. If you are thinkging about renting an apartment this summer, you should be ok on the first day of school, but you never know. Good luck. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:22 PM Flag
[ - ] Everyone has been talking about whether or not the craptastic economy will affect the application process. But what about preschool? Do you think that there will be more accepts from certain schools? 2 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
New York City 02.02.09, 11:59 AM Flag
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I think that preschool will be the least effected because there is no public alternative (other than at 4) and going to preschool gives your dc an edge in the public and private school application process [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:03 PM Flag
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NP: It seems like there are far more universal preK programs out there now than just a few years ago. And some people might just choose to skip the 3s and instead do some classes. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:05 PM Flag
[ - ] Anyone a fan of trouser style jeans? what brand do you have? 1 Reply [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 11:48 AM Flag
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Believe it or not, I found a lovely pair of very dark-wash, boot leg trouser jeans at Target. They're incredibly soft and I love them. Flame away. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:07 PM Flag
[ - ] Last week a psd made a big deal of saying that our is definitely ready for preschool. That's great, of course. But has anyone met any 2.5 year olds who aren't ready for preschool?? 5 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
NY Schools 02.02.09, 11:44 AM Flag
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sure. lots of em. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 11:46 AM Flag
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i don't think pre-school is necessary, but most 2.5 yos are ready for a change, yes. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 11:46 AM Flag
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ooh-was it wendey levey? i remember getting that for our ds years ago. it was ecns, yes? i remember feeling like it was a stock line when we heard it, too. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 11:46 AM Flag
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Mine! At 2.3 had huge separation issuesso we decided to wait until 3and than dc loved preschool. Got into TT with a summer b-day. Each kid has their own timeline. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 11:50 AM Flag
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Wendy Levey says that to every applicant - it's part of her standard schtick. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:55 PM Flag
[ - ] What make-up do you wear during the day? I don't use a lot, but need more I think as I get older. Currently using tinted moisturizer, under-eye concealer, neutral shadow and mascara... Any tips/hints? 9 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 11:44 AM Flag
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I think tinted moisturizer is kind of useless. I prefer more coverage but HATE liquids because they either get crusty, or go in my pores, or melt off. I just began mixing (bear with me) a custom blend of 3 parts of my favorite loose translucent powder (T. LeClerc in Chair Ambree) to 1 part Bare Escentuals warm mineral foundation, and this is great. The B. E. alone makes my face look shiny, but has good coverage. The powder is amazing (incredibly fine-milled) but not enough coverage. The combination looks natural and gives just the right amount of coverage. Also, unlike liquid foundation or tinted moisturizer, it takes 20 seconds to apply and is very hard to screw up. I also use Nars blush in Deep Throat, a neutral warm lip gloss, and one coat of lengthening mascara. This all lasts me all day and makes me look like a good night's sleep. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:11 PM Flag
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BTW, I'm 41, have a 3.5 y/o, and work full-time. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:11 PM Flag
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I think that's a huge cop-out myself (easy for me to say as a tall, relatively successful caucasian woman). But like so many other opinions and attitudes, it's culturally-based and will take generations and many others like Obama, etc., to winnow out. Frankly, I think people will not stop saying this kind of thing for another 8-10 generations. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:13 PM Flag
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Whoops, mispost. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:14 PM Flag
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I am not white, but are you sure you need a lot? I can't stand white women who pile on the makeup - they give me a fright if I ever see them without their makeup on. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:13 PM Flag
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The problem with white skin, as opposed to the skin of most other ethnicities, is it tends to be thinner and more translucent, and thus flaws show up much more dramatically. Wrinkles also show more. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:15 PM Flag
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OP: I think this is my problem. I'm really fair with thin skin and freckles... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 02:46 PM Flag
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Sounds like you aren't even using "makeup" yet. I use and recommend foundation over tinted moisturizer. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:39 PM Flag
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Why don't you go to the department store and seek advice from one of the make-up counters? They do make up for you and advise you on what to do. That's what I did and now I love my natural looking make-up technique. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 03:18 PM Flag
[ - ] Is trying to get your kid into a good school ruining your life? 4 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
New York City 02.02.09, 11:43 AM Flag
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nah. mine's in second grade now - the school thing is fairly meaningless (and was at the time) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 11:45 AM Flag
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not ruining but certainly stressful [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 11:51 AM Flag
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It was last year. Now it is a distant memory. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 11:55 AM Flag
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didn't ruin my life, but it did ruin my waistline [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 11:59 AM Flag
[ - ] would you say that PAC has any diversity? Loved school but dont want ds in class w/only christian. any feedback? TIA 5 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
Preschool/Kids 02.02.09, 11:42 AM Flag
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i do not know of one school that is only christian. if you look at their materials you will see that they generally say they are non-sectarian. this is not true of the temple schools. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 11:44 AM Flag
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true. they do but was hoping for feedback from parent w/child in class. i guess hoping for diversity there. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 11:47 AM Flag
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fwiw, my dc is in a different preschool housed in a church and we have children in the class who are christian, jewish, hindii, islamic and chinese (mostly we just do chinese new year, so i cant comment on buddhist or taoist). we've got a lot of holidays oging on. most do. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 11:51 AM Flag
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PAC mom here. Have had dcs at PAC for 4 years now. Have other children who are asian, Indian, Pakistani, South American, Peurto Rican, European, Jewish, Catholic, Muslim, Hindi, Buddhist, Catholic, Protestant, Episcopalian, Atheists and all combos of these in dcs classes. There is some diversity but there are not more than a few non white children in each class. Hope that helps. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.06.09, 12:55 PM Flag
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^^^I should add that we are Jewish and feel totally comfortable there. ALthough we are in the minority it has never been an issue for us or our dc. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.06.09, 12:57 PM Flag
[ - ] Do ECFS, Brearley or Bank St give feedback? 1 Reply [ Reply | Watch | More ]
NY Schools 02.02.09, 11:41 AM Flag
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we got clear feedback from Brearley last year. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 11:57 AM Flag
[ - ] Advice? Best face moisturizer + wrinkle cream for 40 yo dry skin? Want to pay under $100 7 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 11:40 AM Flag
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Good Genes [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 11:42 AM Flag
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Oh,and I got them FREE from my mum. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 11:42 AM Flag
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me too. works like a charm. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 11:43 AM Flag
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can't buy that [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 11:42 AM Flag
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I'm using Olay Total effects and like it a lot. Also heard good things about Roc... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 11:42 AM Flag
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Derm say the best thing is perscription retinal but after that over the counter retinol. ROC has a decent one [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 11:44 AM Flag
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under $100 per what? how much does moisturizer and wrinkle cream typically cost? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 11:48 AM Flag
[ - ] Hi guys. Need support. I suffer from depression/anxiety 7 had Postpartum depression a couple of yrs ago. Anyway, I am weaning off my meds (been on for 1.5 yrs) and just now at 100mgs I am feeling i think a little depressed. Not anxiety but VERY VERY BORED all of the time. Granted I am bored at work but I notice this feeling carries over on the weekends as well. NOW I am starting to get anxious thinking that I am screwed - will always suffer etc and will always needs meds. I SO BADLY don't want to be on meds my whole life (nothing against please don't take offense) I would feel more confident if I knew I could function without them 7 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
Newborn 02.02.09, 11:40 AM Flag
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Why don't you talk with the dr/therapist who you are working with. This is tough stuff, been there myself. GL. If you/your doc felt you were ready to go off, then have faith that you are. Perhaps you may want to wean even more slowly ? Again, the doc is the place for this. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 11:47 AM Flag
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are you on meds at the momemnt? tia [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 11:48 AM Flag
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no but feel like I might need them! But no, haven't been on for a few yrs. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 11:49 AM Flag
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ok - thank You. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:06 PM Flag
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Here's a potentially different way of thinking about it. Depression is related to heredity and serotonin levels that naturally occur in the brain. If you were diabetic, would you be bummed out because you couldn't wean yourself off your medication? Would you consider yourself "screwed" or beat yourself up like you are? I doubt it. Try being grateful that there's a medication out there that can help you feel normal. It's really a positive thing. Don't feel like it's a cop-out by any means. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:17 PM Flag
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Sounds like the meds help you and you should stay on them, no matter what the amount that fits you may be. Think of it like anything else you "need" in life for whatever reason: your morning coffee, your teeth brushed before bed. Don't get caught up in the whole disillusion that because you are on them that must mean there is something 'wrong" with you. There's something wrong with everyone. It's called being human. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:35 PM Flag
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np: I don't toally agree with posters above. I agree that meds are fine and have used befoer. But op is weaning for a reason I presume, i.e feeling better and wants to be off them. There is no reason why op cannot get off them if they are really ready. Op;s symptoms from wenaing seems very mild so I don;t think op needs to rush back on full force. I just think op and doctor need to figure out what is going on and go from there. FYI, I fully support the use of these meds when needed. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 01:02 PM Flag
[ - ] Does ANYONE pay taxes any more? (besides me, that is) 8 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 11:39 AM Flag
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Yes. HUGE amount! We are just inside a higher braket--which means under Obama we are really screwed. If I stopped working, I think we would actually have more income. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 11:41 AM Flag
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Are you kidding me? We got hit with the AMT (as usual) and owe a shitload. We both claim 0 and take an extra $600 out of our paychecks each month and we still owe thousands of dollars (and no - we don't make that much $$) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 11:41 AM Flag
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Yes, we got the AMT too. Totally sucks as "middle class" in NYC is Upper Middle Class in the rest of the country. Why don't they change that law. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 11:54 AM Flag
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np: how can this be? If you take no exemptions, your employer should be withholding at the highest possible tax rate for your income. I don't get this, unless you separately have income that's not from employment. Is that the case? Are you paying taxes on other income that isn't taxed at all? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:00 PM Flag
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NP: Payroll withholding is calculated based on the regular tax table. It doesn't account for AMT. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 01:55 PM Flag
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Yes but this still doesn't make sense. AMT usually affects people with lots of deductions. Otherwise, it would be part of the regular tax table because it would be the regular tax table. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 02:40 PM Flag
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It drives me NUTS!! All of these politicians not paying their taxes. You're in politics people. Figure it out. I'm not in the public eye, and I pay my taxes. Pathetic. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 01:51 PM Flag
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the rules don't apply to them, they are superior beings [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 01:59 PM Flag
[ - ] Can dc get into the zoned school (ps41 or 3) if we do not live in the apt we own but rented out? How does school check these things? Also, I hear ps41 or 3 is on a lottery? Does that mean even if we own/live in the zone, dc might not be able to get in? 9 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
New York City 02.02.09, 11:38 AM Flag
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Do you pay for utilies at that address? All they require is a utility bill in your name at that address, but they may also mail stuff to you. You are guaranteed a spot if you live in the cathment and lottery is for out of catchment. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 11:42 AM Flag
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if you don't live there it doesn't matter if you pay for the utilties. ps41 is strict about this. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 11:52 AM Flag
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how are they going to know? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:00 PM Flag
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um, lemme see. i'm no nancy drew, but i suppose they could walk past op's building and see her renters' names on the buzzer. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:37 PM Flag
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the address that you use to register must be your primary residence. so if you rent out your apt., you can't use that as proof of residence in the zone. as for 41/3, there are lots of rumors swirling around, but for now you will get either one or the other, but you must actually live in the zone. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 11:49 AM Flag
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op: how long must we live there before registering for the school to be consider ok? also, we can move out of the apartment after dc gets into the school? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:00 PM Flag
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since registration is happening now, you must be living there now (when you register) until at least the first day of school. if they can prove you didn't live there when you registered, they can kick you out. do not underestimate the power of nasty gossips who put two and two together and rat you out so that their class is one dc smaller. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:26 PM Flag
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This gets tricky especially with 41. You see, K is not required in NYC. So you actually have to live in the apartment in the zone on the first day of first grade. After that, you can move and your dc can stay at 41 until the end of 5th grade. BUT, if you have a younger sibling, that child will most likely NOT get to go to 41 and will have to go to zoned school that you moved to. So, you would have to be there to register for the 41/3 lottery for k (which in now btw) and then also be there the first day of k and also be there the first day of first grade. How do they know - people at 41 will tell on you. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:28 PM Flag
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exactly [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:39 PM Flag
[ - ] Anyone's dc who is over 1 yr (mine is 14th mo) is still not eating much solids and still drinks more than 20 oz of milk or formula or breast milk?? Dc is still addicted to breast milk and on the weekend when I am home, she still nurses 4 times a day and sometimes still wakes up at night wanting to nurse. At what age does dc typically wean from breast themselves as oppose to mom weaning the dc? Also is 16+ oz of breast milk a day counter productive to dc's health? 5 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
Toddler 02.02.09, 11:34 AM Flag
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My ped says our 13 month old should be getting the bulk of her nutrients from solid food, and drinking between 16-20 ounces of wholk milk per day. My dc naturally started preferring solid foods when I began to offer her more finger foods and adult food (like spaghetti, roast chicken, etc.) - when she started to eat more of those foods, she simply began to drink less milk. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 11:40 AM Flag
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op: I have been offering her finger foods since 6 months and now more of toddler finger foods but she is a picky eater and does not eat much food. Always offer solids before offering breast milk or cows milk. However she is just not a good/big eater at all and loves to nurse still. I wonder when she will ever wean herself without me forcing to wean her off... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 11:47 AM Flag
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Have you tried offering her the same food you are eating? I've noticed that, regardless of what I happen to be eating, dc will be very eager to eat it too. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 11:49 AM Flag
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op: we offer her our dinner every night, she will only try a few bites and that is it. I do not offer her anything different than our dinner every night. At daycare I prep pasta, noodle, chicken nuggets or other usual toddler lunches. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 11:57 AM Flag
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she may well not wean herslef for a long time - which is fine if you're prepared for that. lots of dcs do not self wean until 2yo or beyond. too much BM is not the same thing as too much cow's milk so not detrimental to her health, but developmentally, you do need to keep encouraging solids. make sure not to let dc nurse until after "meals". good luck [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 12:30 PM Flag
[ - ] Am starting to hear that many schools aren't really considering legacys as they used to. Has anyone heard the same? 6 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 11:25 AM Flag
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yes. i think that unless a leg is actively involved or a big $ donor, it's only going to make a difference if trying to decide between 2 equally qualified dc. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 11:27 AM Flag
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Many schools no longer offer early notification for siblings or legacies. I think (and this may changes starting now with the economy) that the sudden proliferation of increased sib applications due to people having more babies and fewer people moving out of the city had a negative affect on legacies assuming the schools wanted to keep the non-sib, non-leg number relatively constant, and sibs will typically get a preference over legs. Again, I would imagine this trend will subside going forward. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 11:29 AM Flag
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This trend will revert--In the next cycle of applications, because the "new banking folks" will be leaving town or PSing it, Legacies will come back into vogue. It is always safe to go with a legacy because their parents probably won't go broke or leave town--they are there for the duration. Plus, old money continues to give, new money will be no money. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 11:38 AM Flag
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LOL, our dc is a legacy at two schools and there is no way we are considered "old money!" :) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 11:43 AM Flag
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Perhaps not, but by being a legacy, it means you are born NYCers and less likely to more because of family-community connections. You would be more likely to stay than say a person born in San Fran who is here only for their job, right? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 11:48 AM Flag
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Agree with this 100%. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.02.09, 01:31 PM Flag
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