• Filter the conversation
[ - ] Has anyone else watched the Finding Your Roots episode with Felicity Huffman? I found her very likable, and her story complicates/softens my reaction to the college admissions scandal. (Also, I love that show . . .). 20 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 09:08 PM Flag
»
I still like her even with the admissions scandal. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 09:38 PM Flag
»
I think she is a genuinely nice person but she knowingly and purposely did something very wrong and also illegal. 14 days seems fair. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 09:41 PM Flag
»
How about the five year sentence for the black woman in Texas who cast a vote thinking she was eligible to vote while on parole? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.14.19, 12:47 AM Flag
»
np: That is completely evil on the part of the justice system and she shouldn't have gone to jail. That doesn't equate to Huffman deserving more time. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.14.19, 12:52 AM Flag
»
"What-about-ism" is such an immature deflection. You sound like the dumpster. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.14.19, 09:43 AM Flag
»
She needed at LEAST 30 days. 14 is nothing. She would have agreed to 14 just to get her kid in college. Infuriating. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.14.19, 12:04 PM Flag
»
Standardized tests totally screw over kids with learning disabilities. The entire system needs to be revised. Not being able to do well on a standardized test should not prevent someone from getting into Yale School of drama if they are smart enough and talented enough. I'm not saying what she did was right - but I don't hold it against her. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 09:42 PM Flag
»
Yale School of Drama is a graduate school. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 10:32 PM Flag
»
Are you kidding? What child who can’t overcompensate for LD on standardized test has a shot in hell at succeeding at Yale? Especially when already taking test untimed? Juilliard, fine, but Yale? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.14.19, 01:15 AM Flag
»
She doesn’t have a LD. those who do get extra time. If an individual is completely misrepresented by standardized tests - apply to test optional schools [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.14.19, 12:05 PM Flag
»
This kind of slap on the wrist is going to deter other parents. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 09:50 PM Flag
»
No it isn’t. It’s just going to make them better at not getting caught. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.14.19, 12:06 PM Flag
»
She's really injured her daughter. She paid to have her child's scores boosted by 400 points, so her child scored about 1000 ...and this will be on the internet forever. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 09:59 PM Flag
»
So who cares about SAT scores? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.14.19, 12:50 AM Flag
»
I do. My child does [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.14.19, 12:07 PM Flag
»
Anybody else wonder about celebrities that made it into prestigious colleges in the past? Was it on their own ability and talent or did they have parental *help* like this? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 10:23 PM Flag
»
All of the above. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 11:07 PM Flag
»
Celebrities or children of celebrities? Many children of celebrities apply to colleges and few go to the top schools. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.14.19, 12:52 AM Flag
»
They get in because of name alone. The name is like a brand and buys positive PR for school. Being a child of A list or famous actor boosts your chances a millionfold without having to cheat. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.14.19, 01:17 AM Flag
»
This. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.14.19, 12:07 PM Flag
[ - ] Felicity Huffman pleaded guilty to honest services fraud, which has been interpreted by the court to mean "fraudulent schemes to deprive another of honest services through bribes or kickbacks supplied by a third party who ha[s] not been deceived." She also pleaded guilty to wire fraud, but that seems more straight forward. Had any of you heard of honest services fraud before? I hadn't. Does this mean a SAT test taker is providing a service? 10 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 09:01 PM Flag
»
She deprived her daughter of an honest service. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 09:11 PM Flag
»
NP, is that what it means? Not that she deprived colleges where the daughter (might have) applied of an honest service? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 09:16 PM Flag
»
It has to be the colleges, because otherwise it wouldn't be fraud if her daughter had been complicit. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 09:22 PM Flag
»
nnp: could also be the college board in that they represented her daughter took the test when she did not (or at least not unassisted). i'd have to read the charging instrument to be sure. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 09:33 PM Flag
»
No no no [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 09:37 PM Flag
»
not this [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 11:59 PM Flag
»
I have, but i'm a lawyer. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 09:25 PM Flag
»
She deprived other applicants of honest service. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 09:36 PM Flag
»
It helps to understand the term "honest services fraud" if you just replace it with "fraud against the public trust in our fundamental US institutions." In order for a larger federal government to work, people have to be able to have trust in federally-guaranteed banks, USPS, social security, our voting system etc. and so on. Yes, even the SAT. That's a national test. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 09:41 PM Flag
»
thanks! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 11:09 PM Flag
[ - ] Could someone please compare/contrast Buckley, St. Bernards, and St. Davids? 5 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
NY Schools 09.13.19, 08:49 PM Flag
»
Buckley appears to be the best at ice hockey. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 09:43 PM Flag
»
Superficially: sporty, academic, religious. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 10:07 PM Flag
»
Not just superficially. They are more similar than different, but these are the differences. All are traditional. Lots of blue blazers, lots of table manners. Lots of blonds. Buckley wins at hockey. St B has better SSAT scores. St D boys are more likely Catholic. We liked them all, would have been happy at them all, at the one that fits us best. Good communities at all. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 10:49 PM Flag
»
Buckley - sporty poor academics, St. Bernards is the best on the list [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 11:13 PM Flag
»
St. David's, warm, kind; St. Bernard's -- most rigorous by reputation, can be rough for kids who struggle academically; Buckley -- sports emphasis, can be inflexible, not very diverse, though that is changing. All three are good academically and have good HS placement. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.14.19, 02:29 PM Flag
[ - ] Bracing for flames - but are these clogs hideous or ok for commuting: 9 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 08:25 PM Flag
»
»
Fine. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 08:27 PM Flag
»
they're fine [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 10:52 PM Flag
»
»
Sorry about the long length of link! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 11:43 PM Flag
»
These are so comfortable, I love mine. Who cares if they are not gorgeous? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.14.19, 01:10 AM Flag
»
I wouldn’t be caught dead wearing them. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 11:52 PM Flag
»
Do you like them? Do they fit well and support your feet, legs, and back? Are they comfortable? Are they in your budget? Shoe choices do not need to be crowdsourced. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.14.19, 09:45 AM Flag
»
Clogs aren’t meant to be worn in public. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.14.19, 01:17 PM Flag
[ - ] last time i flew coach to europe with kids by myself i wanted to kill them. so just spent $5K on business class (that's after cashing in chase sapphire miles). flame away. not rich. this is a lot of money for me 48 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 08:23 PM Flag
»
is it an over night flight? I don't mind coach in the front of the plane when they offer the 4 extra inches. seems to make a diff. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 08:25 PM Flag
»
overnight yes [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 08:27 PM Flag
»
If ever there was a csb... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.14.19, 09:45 AM Flag
»
You pay for that right? It never seems to be available [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 09:01 PM Flag
»
yes you pay a little extra [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 09:06 PM Flag
»
OK. I'd rather save the incremental money, suffer a few hours, then have the extra funds to spend on the hotel, activities and destinations. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 08:26 PM Flag
»
+1 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 08:31 PM Flag
»
+1 traveled to Europe frequently with young kid and traveling business would not ever have occurred to me, but mine slept. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 08:34 PM Flag
»
+1000 especially being "not rich" [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 08:47 PM Flag
»
+2, esp since the kids are 5 & 7, and they can totally be entertained by the movies or a tablet. I fly every summer with 2 kids too and those ages are very easy. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 09:16 PM Flag
»
Same! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.14.19, 03:39 AM Flag
»
++ and Dramamine. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.15.19, 07:01 AM Flag
»
How old are the kids? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 08:28 PM Flag
»
5 and 7 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 09:03 PM Flag
»
5K per ticket or all together? doesn't sound too bad if for all. I spent more than that on coach tickets [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 08:30 PM Flag
»
total [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 09:00 PM Flag
»
oh! and plus cashing in points. to me 5k is good for several business class seats . how many tickets? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 09:08 PM Flag
»
3 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 09:41 PM Flag
»
How many tickets? I get bad flights to save money - it’s only a few hours [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 08:52 PM Flag
»
That's the whole cost of European vacation for a family if you're "not rich." They are thoroughly entertained on airplanes whether in coach or business class, and they are no less likely to tell you that they are bored in business class. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 08:52 PM Flag
»
it's a 10PM flight. ie i can put them to "bed" and work [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 09:01 PM Flag
»
So why can’t you put them to bed in coach. Especially at that age? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.14.19, 03:55 PM Flag
»
You can’t be that poor if you are taking the kids to Europe [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 08:58 PM Flag
»
totally worth it -- also not rich. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 08:58 PM Flag
»
yep. it's $12K total - I cashed in lots of chase points for the difference. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 09:02 PM Flag
»
oh that explains it! I was thinking 5K sounds like a steal [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 09:11 PM Flag
»
If $5k vs. $3k for three tickets, I get it. If $15k vs $3k and you're "not rich" that's madness. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 09:00 PM Flag
»
it's $5k. i would have paid nothing if i just used miles for coach [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 09:04 PM Flag
»
Why not just buy extra couple of coach seats, so that kids can sleep, it's way cheaper than bus class. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 10:49 PM Flag
»
Smart [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.14.19, 02:07 PM Flag
»
I hope you enjoy the warmed nuts for that price! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 09:02 PM Flag
»
Sounds like maybe an extra 1-1500 - a lot but a nice splurge if you can. Not crazy. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 09:04 PM Flag
»
agree [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 09:16 PM Flag
»
Holy shit, that's a lot of money. Totally wasted IMHO. I've travelled to Europe solo and both of my kids have special needs (one with autism) - no problems. If you can't get an able-bodied, neurotypical kid to sleep on an overnight plane ride, the problem is you. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 09:11 PM Flag
»
WTF, many adults cannot sleep on the plane, even those who travel tons for business and are used to frequent travel. Some kids also may not find a comfortable position to sleep, it's not like it's easy to sleep sitting up. I could never do this as a kid and still can barely get an hour or two if I am lucky as an adult. I just stay awake and deal with it, one night of sleep deprivation isn't going to kill anyone. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 10:51 PM Flag
»
I'm on the West coast - 5 more hours of flight time than you! Seriously, you just run them like dogs, or make them swim or ride bikes. Anything physical so they are tired. I personally never sleep on planes and never could it when I had to fly weekly on business, but if I can get a disregulated autistic kid to be chill, not kick the seat of the person in front of them or to scream or run around, you can manage your kid such that you don't want to kill them at flight's end. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.14.19, 01:15 AM Flag
»
Ily [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.14.19, 02:06 PM Flag
»
This is a bad idea unless you plan to do it all the time. We were upgraded and my DD still complains about flying coach when we travel and she never did before. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 09:44 PM Flag
»
If you can afford it, it’s worth it. This way, you are not dreading the outbound trip in advance, or dreading the inbound flight while you are on vacation. Makes the whole anticipation of the trip much more pleasant. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 10:17 PM Flag
»
Well, not dreading and having a pleasant trip is a luxury - for the rich. Sorry to break the news to you. Not rich people travel coach and deal with it unless they have tons of miles. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 10:52 PM Flag
»
Sounds like a huge waste unless you have money to burn since kids are small and Europe isn’t New Zealand. But since you are doing I hope it’s wonderful - and that the kids sleep! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.14.19, 02:19 AM Flag
»
You should have spent %5 on Benadrylor melatonin instead. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.14.19, 10:23 AM Flag
»
Dramamine is OK, too. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.15.19, 07:02 AM Flag
»
That's absurd. No reason for kids to travel business class ever, especially if you aren't rich. Benadryl, an eye mask and some headphones are a much more reasonable solution. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.14.19, 12:10 PM Flag
»
This [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.14.19, 02:05 PM Flag
»
Planes are just buses in the sky. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.14.19, 01:17 PM Flag
»
18hrs trip every year (2 flights : 15 1/2 + 2hrs) in coach with 2 DC, 1 of whom SN. Coach bc not rich, but I really need the holidays. Now that I know it's unpleasant, but doable, I wouldn't fork 3 times the price, if I was not absolutely loaded. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.14.19, 02:33 PM Flag
»
I fly with mine (younger) in coach all the time. The secret is to take the day flight to london then connect on if you're going elsewhere. It's honestly so painless. 5.5 hours of them watching movies - was ten times harder connecting through atlanta to vegas with them recently. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.14.19, 09:20 PM Flag
[ - ] Anybody have their weight distribute funny after they hit a certain age? I am the same weight but I am lumpier and bumpier than before and in different places. I have been chubby for awhile but my rear got really round and my stomach dunlopped whereas before it never did. And I swear my knees and one ankle got fat. I work out 3-4x a week. 5 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 08:04 PM Flag
»
"dunlopped"? As opposed to spalding? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 08:21 PM Flag
»
Yes, I now have a muffin top when I sit down. IF helped a bit this summer. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 08:56 PM Flag
»
Starting to get there, I guess the only way to avoid it is being completely fat free, this way fat isn't distributing anywhere funny. I guess middle aged women are meant to eat almost nothing by nature and still survive, not a bad thing. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.14.19, 12:00 AM Flag
»
You are losing muscle mass. Work out harder and do more weight training. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.14.19, 09:46 AM Flag
»
I think you’re right. I feel like my fat is getting harder, it’s not soft like it used to be. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.14.19, 04:25 PM Flag
[ - ] My grocery store now carries chicken feet, except the signage and labels read "chicken paws." Hilarious re-branding. Never thought of those birds scratching around the barnyard with their cute little pawsies. 11 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 07:33 PM Flag
»
I once had a boss who was much older. One of his favorite things was to tell me about how much he loved chicken feet as a kid and watch the look on my face. He laughed every time. He actually passed away just about 20 years ago now. Gah! the chicken feet. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 07:47 PM Flag
»
Do they carry pigs paws too? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 07:58 PM Flag
»
Not yet! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 08:50 PM Flag
»
I suspect that's why they call them "trotters". NP [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 09:12 PM Flag
»
You are so right [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 10:03 PM Flag
»
OP: My dad used to eat pickled lamb tongue from a jar. Dying to know what this place would call that. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 08:53 PM Flag
»
I have a jar of herring & onions in white wine vinegar in my fridge for those moments when I NEED JUST A BITE. I get this. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 08:57 PM Flag
»
I'm trying to think of anything I do this with? Green crunchy olives. Canned chicken breast, at least that's pantry safe. Most things I go through every week, even the seaweed! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 09:22 PM Flag
»
Oh god I have so much food storage. It's sad. My SIL is like you, she has almost no food in the house at all. Boggles my mind. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 10:05 PM Flag
»
I realized young that there’s two kinds of grocery shoppers and I had one of each as parents. My dad was a planner- he’d buy for the month, he’d stock up on sales, he had a list of staples, we never ran out of anything. My mom would go to the store every day it seemed like. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 10:36 PM Flag
»
Sheep Lickers [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 10:13 PM Flag
[ - ] Has anyone who was originally the logistics manager of the family backed off and shifted some (half?) of that duty to DH? How did you do it, and did it work out? DH keeps forwarding me info about this or that performance or activity, suggesting they'd be fun for the family, but I am so tired of being the one to look up tickets and figure out the best date and check all the calendars, etc. No rancor between us -- I'm just burned out. Thanks. 6 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 07:29 PM Flag
»
Yes. You can be direct preferably in person “if you think it’s great book it yourself” and if that doesn’t work passive “sorry I didn’t get the email” or “too busy”. With both you have to accept that events may cease to happen and dh May be upset and you may be excluded. Good luck [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 07:32 PM Flag
»
+1 to this - definitely be direct. “Show looks good! So you’re booking the tickets and getting a sitter?” [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 07:43 PM Flag
»
And don’t micromanage him- if he doesn’t check schedules and picks a bad date, he lives with the consequences (lost $, angry child who is missing another event, etc) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 07:45 PM Flag
»
I like to do all that stuff. But I am usually the one to come up with the plans too. To me this sounds nice that your DH comes up with family activity ideas. I would be happy to field these ideas and figure out which day works best. But I am also kind of controlling about scheduling! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 07:46 PM Flag
»
We sit down as a family on Sunday mornings and talk about the forthcoming family calendar for the week and thereafter. We actually have a paper calendar. That's the time anyone brings up what they think we should be doing and it gets assigned based upon who is busiest that week. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 07:50 PM Flag
»
That's my dynamic with DH exactly. I'm slowly starting telling him to buy the tix or I'll do whatever he wants on the weekend. Kind of passive but not sure how to do this differently. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 07:52 PM Flag
[ - ] I'm early 30s, female, NYC. Should I go out with a man who is 12 years older? For some reason this feels kind of icky to me. People in my family live a long time. What if I spent the last 20 years of my life as a widow? I was almost engaged last year to someone 3 years younger. On the other hand, if I hold out for perfection maybe I'm being silly. Does anyone have any experience with such a gap, firsthand or secondhand? 29 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 07:07 PM Flag
»
OP: Both of us are never married and no kids. He mentioned wanting kids. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 07:08 PM Flag
»
Poster below. A lot of men say they want kids but do not have a lifestyle that compatible with family life (and lots have them anyway and make their wives miserable). Look for someone who is stable in their professional and personal life, has a nice family and friends who are settled down with kids. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 07:20 PM Flag
»
If you want kids. I don’t [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 07:24 PM Flag
»
I personally advise my friends to focus on early/mid 30s men. I just find the ones that are still single in their 40s either don’t really want someone or aren’t really interested in the sacrifices of a relationship. That being said it’s good to keep an open mind on the first few dates. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 07:12 PM Flag
»
When my aunt was 25 she married a 45 year old. Her parents freaked out, did not attend the wedding, and it tore the family apart. In the end, they were happily married for 30 years, until SHE died first. You never know. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 07:16 PM Flag
»
How awful that her parents chose to die on that hill. Live and let live, love and let love. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 07:23 PM Flag
»
Wow thanks for sharing [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 07:24 PM Flag
»
My husband is 17 years older than I am, but as a woman I've always kind of assumed widowhood was inevitable. If you REALLY don't want to be a widow, you should be looking for someone 12 years younger than you. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 07:23 PM Flag
»
Go out with him? Sure. It sounds like you're talking about a first date, right? A little premature to be wondering "what if we get married and stay married the rest of our lives but then he dies when I'm 70." [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 07:25 PM Flag
»
I totally agree. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 07:28 PM Flag
»
Not sure I would agree. If the purpose of your dating is to find a spouse, why continue seeing anyone once you know you wouldn't marry him? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 07:40 PM Flag
»
Seconding [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 09:23 PM Flag
»
I think you are overthinking this. Good/great partners are so rare (at least on this board); if you find someone you are compatible with, don't worry about the age difference. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 07:27 PM Flag
»
Haha, sad but true [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 09:23 PM Flag
»
This. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 09:40 PM Flag
»
I'm 48. I married my husband when I was 44 and he was 61. I recognize it's probable he will die well before me. But I married my first husband when I was 27 and he was 29, and he died unexpectedly at age 41. There are no guarantees in life. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 07:34 PM Flag
»
OP: Wow. I'm glad you found a new partner and are happy. Love is precious. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 07:35 PM Flag
»
Thanks for sharing [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 09:23 PM Flag
»
My dh is 12 years older. We got married when I was 29. Now 17 years and 2 kids later, I couldn’t be happier [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 07:36 PM Flag
»
OP: Thank you!!!!!! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 07:37 PM Flag
»
My DH is 13 years older than me and we started dating when I was 30. We are now married with 2 kids and are so happy together. First marriage for both of us. I considered the actuarial tables and decided that I'd rather be very happy with my DH and the family we build together in my 30s/40s/50s even if I am widowed early. I am already mentally preparing for those years (hey! I can live wherever I want!). And if I have to take care of him I am sure it could be enormously challenging but he is the love of my life and that's what spouses are for. He took care of me through an unexpected medical issue. We've been together for over a decade and I am so happy that we are together. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 08:56 PM Flag
»
I feel the same. DH is 23 years older [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 09:07 PM Flag
»
Love stories like this. Love truly blooms in unexpected places. My mom and dad were 20 years apart too. She was a widow in her mid 50’s. She said she won the lottery with him and it was the best 30+ years she could ever hope for. She only lived another 10 years. There is no guarantee in life you’ll live a long, happy or healthy one. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 09:17 PM Flag
»
^I meant my mom was 55 when my dad died. She died 10 years later. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 09:18 PM Flag
»
No guarantees in life. My mom was 10 years younger than dad. She died age 45, he lived till 92, so heartbroken he never remarried. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 09:41 PM Flag
»
If you are so connected to this person that you're together for 30+ years and then live out a bunch of years alone, I suspect you'd be so happy for those wonderful decades together and know that's the price you'd have to pay. I wouldn't discount someone in my early 30s because I was afraid to be alone in my 80s. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 09:59 PM Flag
»
There are worse things than spending your last 20 years as a widow. I am living with a dh with multiple chronic illnesses and now cancer. I feel like I bounce from crisis to crisis. The good news is you’re younger and have more energy than him to deal with it. The bad news is this your retirement. Could be worse. The shit could have hit the fan when I was still working. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 10:53 PM Flag
»
Of course! You should be so desperate like all other single 30-something women in NYC, because you know, nobody wants to date any girl above age 28 in NYC, they are all destined to be cat/dog ladies. Is this the answer you were looking for your fakety bored troll post? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.14.19, 12:27 AM Flag
»
In the (admittedly sexist) French equation that says the perfect woman for a man os half his age plus seven years, you're already too old for him. Age is just a number if the chemistry is there. But I agree that you sounds like a troll [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.14.19, 07:13 PM Flag
[ - ] Have you signed up your DC in K for after school activities? I haven’t considered signing up though he may be interested in a sport. Was concerned that it might be too much after a long day at school. I would probably do something for DC in the spring. But maybe adjusting to the longer day won’t be a big deal? Anyone btdt? 3 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 07:05 PM Flag
»
So kid-dependent. For one of my kids, even in K, a school day was nowhere NEAR enough activity - she was (at her own insistence) enrolled in sports and other things almost every day after school. For the other, school was really enough, and then she wanted to be mostly home. They are two extremes - most kids are probably somewhere in the middle. It's great to find a sport to use to blow off steam, though, so I wouldn't hesitate to sign a kid up for that. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 07:11 PM Flag
»
In K, my DD played soccer and tennis. Starting 1st and she's in ballet and soccer. May do tennis again in winter when soccer. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 07:15 PM Flag
»
Nope. We went to the park when the weather was good, otherwise we can home, hung out together, made dinner, went grocery shopping, had some of her friends over. Hours of structured stuff in school needs to be balanced out. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 09:52 PM Flag
[ - ] I am a pushover "nice guy" boss. My employees like me but take full advantage of me. I supervise a few people who are supposed to work a 9-5 type of thing (7 hours of work). I let them arrange the schedule however they like. One of them has been coming in at 3 pm - or later - and she probably does stay until 10 pm but it's a lot less useful to the office than if she were here during normal business hours. She has been promising to improve for years but I honestly can't remember the last time I saw her here before 2:30 pm. What can I do? We are friends and I can't just suddenly insist she show up by noon. 18 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 06:58 PM Flag
»
you are her boss and you can indeed insist. sit her down and say look, i like to accommodate people's schedules when i can but not if it impedes getting the work done, so i need you to come in by 12. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 07:01 PM Flag
»
OP: She can't even make it by 3 pm. :( [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 07:02 PM Flag
»
does she understand it is required? are you ready to fire her if she can't do that? because she will not get as sweet a deal anywhere else so not getting fired should be a good incentive [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 07:06 PM Flag
»
OP: It's impossible to fire anyone here. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 07:08 PM Flag
»
Where do you work? I can come at 12pm, sounds perfect! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 07:22 PM Flag
»
do you have any incentives/disncentives you can use? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 07:34 PM Flag
»
^^ and as you know you cannot be friends with your direct reports. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 07:06 PM Flag
»
OP:I posted about this on UB about 6 years ago and everyone attacked me for being such a pushover. Guess what? Nothing has changed! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 07:04 PM Flag
»
So what? Is it hurting you? Your career? Your customers/clients, even? Live the life you want, the way you want. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 07:14 PM Flag
»
You aren't friends. If you want to accommodate flexible schedules, you should name a core period of four or five hours that everyone must observe -- let people vary their day on the margins only. Like "everyone must be here 11 am to 4 pm, plus the three (or four?) hours of your choice -- so 7 to 4 or 10 to 7 would both work. Midnight to 9 am would not. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 07:25 PM Flag
»
This! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 07:27 PM Flag
»
Core period works well, but I advise having a brief meeting. Give two problems that the company needs to solve, and then tell everyone the way to solve them both is with core hours. Define the core hours, give a deadline for starting them at least two-fours weeks forward, and ask for brief feedback. To every objection, say, "I see. Can you set up a one-on-one with me before the end of next week, so we can revise that process? Thanks." Publish the new requirement and start date in an all-company email, and include a brief note to discuss any conflicts and changes with direct managers. I worked for a company that had complete individual flexibility and freedom, including 100% work remote. Then a new HR director and a new CFO started, and they unilaterally imposed "core hours" of 9am to 4pm for all employees, even the ones who had 100% remote set-ups. Half the staff booked vacation and personal days immediately and then quit within two months when they found other jobs. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.14.19, 10:00 AM Flag
»
MY SIL liked to pull this trick. "Why do I need to come in by 10am? I'm getting my work done?". She was fired. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 08:04 PM Flag
»
You aren't very good to your company. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 08:34 PM Flag
»
May be instead of her you need to be fired. She might be doing some of her job but you clearly are not doing your job. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 11:59 PM Flag
»
OP: Who do you think does her work from 9-3? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.14.19, 03:51 AM Flag
»
Then you should be demoted from boss to employee. You clearly are not doing you job as a good boss. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.14.19, 08:00 AM Flag
»
How high up in the company are you? When regimes change a lot of heads can roll, including yours. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 11:34 PM Flag
[ - ] If I take Metronorth to White Plains tomorrow afternoon will there be taxis waiting at the station or will I need to Uber? 3 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 06:57 PM Flag
»
I'm sorry, but I don't know. I only ever went to White Plains once, for a funeral, and that was long before Uber was invented. I hope someone else will reply with more guidance. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 06:58 PM Flag
»
Probably can Uber anywhere. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 06:59 PM Flag
»
Yes there should be taxis and/or car services there. The WP station is very big and busy. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 07:02 PM Flag
[ - ] What's the word I'm looking for? You've read something, and then summarized it in your own words. You haven't quoted the original text. Fairly common word, I just can't put my finger on it. I think it begins with a C. 6 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 06:46 PM Flag
»
cite? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 06:50 PM Flag
»
paraphrase [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 06:53 PM Flag
»
yes, i think this is what i'm going for. thanks! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 07:00 PM Flag
»
This has been bugging me all morning! I stuck on words that begin with C. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 07:01 PM Flag
»
recapitulate? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 06:59 PM Flag
»
OR: Synopsize? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 07:00 PM Flag
[ - ] How can I prepare dc for the Anderson test? 36 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 05:44 PM Flag
»
There’s really no point in doing this. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 05:44 PM Flag
»
Don't bother. So few get in, even with good scores, the ROI for prep is just awful. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 05:44 PM Flag
»
especially now as virtually all of the 6th grade admits are kids with IEPs. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 05:49 PM Flag
»
Really?? How many kids did they take? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 05:57 PM Flag
»
They expect to have 10 seats. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 06:00 PM Flag
»
And 6 of them will be kids with IEP. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 06:05 PM Flag
»
I know someone who has three kids there. It is worth a shot. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 06:01 PM Flag
»
So what do I need to do? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 06:03 PM Flag
»
For elementary yes but not middle school. I assume OP is talking about 6th grade. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 06:05 PM Flag
»
Yes for 6th grade, is there something we can do at home to prepare? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 06:07 PM Flag
»
Harass your ES principal about getting DC an IEP for anxiety or ADD. Seriously - without an IEP, forget it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 06:08 PM Flag
»
You are not answering the question. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 06:12 PM Flag
»
An IEP alone doesn’t make you a student with disabilities. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 06:24 PM Flag
»
Sorry, IEP that requires placement in an ICT classroom. Happy? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 07:42 PM Flag
»
Anxiety and ADD don’t get you in ICT necessarily. Schools take this seriously as well. There are independent evaluations. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 08:00 PM Flag
»
Well, I know two kids who got into Anderson MS with those diagnoses on their IEPs. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 08:04 PM Flag
»
Does dc have 4.4 on both ela and math state tests? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 06:08 PM Flag
»
Yes [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 06:11 PM Flag
»
GL! And test for Hunter next year. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 08:06 PM Flag
»
I will answer your question. The Anderson exam has 6th grade math. It's straightforward but DC needs to know vocabulary like prime factorization. You could have your DC go through 6th grade Khan academy at home. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 06:14 PM Flag
»
^^the rest of the test is not very hard and IMO the process is BS. My DC and 10 other kids we know got into Hunter, all of them took the Anderson test, none got in. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 06:15 PM Flag
»
Congrats to your dc. How difficult is the humanities part of the test at Anderson? Is that also 6h grade level? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 06:18 PM Flag
»
Yes, my DC said it was easy. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 07:42 PM Flag
»
+1 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 06:26 PM Flag
»
Is that all? I hear some parents sending kids to classes, are they just to learn advanced math? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 06:15 PM Flag
»
And thank you for actually answering my question! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 06:16 PM Flag
»
np: I think the A test is also difficult because fewer questions so each worth more. My DC is excellent at math and ELA, but didn't even know what "prime factorization" meant. Now at Hunter. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 06:38 PM Flag
»
There's an essay but it's the standard 3-paragraph format. Maybe some kids need to brush up on that. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 07:44 PM Flag
»
Yes. Start when DC is born. Talk and read to him/her as much as possible. Provide a healthy diet. Get outside and explore. Limit or prohibit screen time. Answer their questions. Do this consistently and your DC will be "prepared." [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 06:48 PM Flag
»
NP: I consider myself smug, but I've got nothing on you. Kudos! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 07:01 PM Flag
»
oy [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 07:13 PM Flag
»
We probably know the same person. She is Canadian & Chinese. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.14.19, 03:44 AM Flag
»
Coming from Anderson, don't bother. The school isn't good and the kids aren't all that smart [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 08:38 PM Flag
»
But it's all relative. Is A better than other options? Likely so. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 09:01 PM Flag
»
I toured all the D3 schools and thought Booker T was better than Anderson. Booker is very large, however. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 11:20 PM Flag
»
My favorite D3 school was mott hall. We all like different things. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.14.19, 12:21 AM Flag
[ - ] Anyone watch Showtime’s Couples Therapy? I hope they can still live their lives in NY after being so honest. The therapist is a really sharp one. 18 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 05:38 PM Flag
»
No. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 05:39 PM Flag
»
It's so good! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 05:49 PM Flag
»
Right? I binge-watched the whole season. Now I am rewatching. So much childhood stuff shapes the way they treat their partners. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 05:59 PM Flag
»
Right? With whom do you most relate? I am DeSean. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 06:20 PM Flag
»
Is this a new show? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 05:59 PM Flag
»
It is new. I don’t think Showtime has started broadcasting it yet. I am watching on-demand. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 06:41 PM Flag
»
Maybe I'll give it a try. I think I might be confusing the title with some other shows ... I think it's also a trash show on VH1 for example, and it also made me remember some show with couples who were in sex counseling that turned into a bit TMI for me. I'll look at the SHO version tx :) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 07:03 PM Flag
»
Yes, that’s correct. There was an icky VH1 show with the same name. I hope you enjoy it! Please check back here, if you feel like the discussing it. I will be watching this thread. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 08:46 PM Flag
»
I love how the therapist told Mau that he could try to listen to what she is saying rather than dissect and dwell on word choice. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 06:39 PM Flag
»
he is so arrogant. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 09:03 PM Flag
»
I am surprised the wife doesn’t seem more bothered by his arrogance. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.14.19, 03:06 AM Flag
»
The therapist wonders how any relationship can possibly bear the weight of such unrealistic, fantasy-fueled expectations. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 06:52 PM Flag
»
Is it scripted or reality? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 07:30 PM Flag
»
It’s a documentary. The sessions between the therapist and her clinical counselor are very interesting. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 08:36 PM Flag
»
Wow. -signed, therapist. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 09:22 PM Flag
»
^^^ clinical advisor [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.14.19, 03:58 PM Flag
»
watched all of it and can't stop thinking about it!! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 09:02 PM Flag
»
Yay! I hope they give us more episodes. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.14.19, 03:07 AM Flag
[ - ] Let's talk BRAS. What brands do you like and where do you buy them? 70 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 05:26 PM Flag
»
Dunnes convertible with underwire. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 05:34 PM Flag
»
Maidenform wireless [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 09:44 PM Flag
»
DH here - any nice upscale store/brand for a nice present for my missus? Not thinking trashy lingirie or whatnot, but comfortable and classy stuff she'd enjoy but probably not splurge on herself to buy. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 05:43 PM Flag
»
Missus? Gross. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 05:44 PM Flag
»
DH: Oh c'mon. I don't call my wife that IRL :) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 05:49 PM Flag
»
np: It's super gross. Not even to yourself please. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 06:06 PM Flag
»
DH: *rolls eyes* [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 06:43 PM Flag
»
oh have a sense of humor, please [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 05:50 PM Flag
»
Better than "the ol' ball and chain" [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 06:00 PM Flag
»
The "missus" guy is NOT OP. I am OP, a woman, just came back after first posting. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 07:44 PM Flag
»
So you say you're trying to get wank bank material and won't pay for your porn like a normal person, so you come here to ask about underwear... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 05:49 PM Flag
»
DH: What's with all the hostility? Just looking for a nice gift suggestion for my wife. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 05:58 PM Flag
»
Underwear is not a nice gift, it’s an every day necessity. Like toothpaste. Think of something else [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 06:59 PM Flag
»
+ It's a fine stocking stuffer type of gift if he is buying a kind she already has an established love for but otherwise this is either creepy or just lame. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 07:26 PM Flag
»
Ok agree with this. Even toothpaste is ok as a stocking stuffer. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 09:11 PM Flag
»
La Perla. Journelle. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 07:05 PM Flag
»
DH: Thank you! Will check them out! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 07:08 PM Flag
»
np. Simone Perelle, Chantelle. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 07:20 PM Flag
»
DH: TY! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 07:22 PM Flag
»
no dude, no. Back to the drawing board. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 07:23 PM Flag
»
Nordstrom gift card. They have a good bra selection and trained fitters, and if she isn't in the mood for a bra she can get something else [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.14.19, 02:37 AM Flag
»
tough crowd here today [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 05:52 PM Flag
»
Uniqlo. So super comfortable. I shall post a link to the model. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 05:55 PM Flag
»
»
I’m you. I wear these every day!! Love, love, love them. So comfortable. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.14.19, 02:11 AM Flag
»
Ok, I see that you're trying to be nice here. But why are you buying her lingerie/bras? Kind of something you want to buy for yourself, no? I guess it just looks kind of like a 'dress up for me in this' kind of gift. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 06:07 PM Flag
»
np I know the kind of garments OP means. Around my house we call them the "that's nice, take it off" style. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 06:08 PM Flag
»
It is. But there are men like that. Their wives are objects. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 06:09 PM Flag
»
DH: I'm not thinking of actually buying the articles. Just a gift card so she can treat herself to something nice and a little indulgent. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 06:44 PM Flag
»
Indulgent for whom? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 06:45 PM Flag
»
np: for me a pretty bra that fits is an indulgence and usually costs above $70. a gift card would actually be a nice gift as long as it didn't come with the expectation i woudl buy something more sexy than functional [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 06:59 PM Flag
»
DH: This is what I'm going for. Please note comfortable and classy was my criteria - something well made, comfortable, good fit, not some fantasy get-up. She buys cheap stuff online but then is always rushing to get her bra off when she gets home and comfortable, so I'm guessing she can find something more comfortable! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 07:05 PM Flag
»
I’m sorry you’re getting hazed. Sounds loving and thoughtful to me [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 07:27 PM Flag
»
DH: Thanks! Was admittedly surprised by the angry responses! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 07:39 PM Flag
»
np. Then buy her a gift card to one of the bra boutiques where you live. In NYC that would be Linda's (my first choice), Intimacy is a chain I believe so a little pushy, Iris in Brooklyn, Town Shoppe, Le Petite Coquette. They will measure her and recommend something that fits really well. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 07:50 PM Flag
»
This. It’s a gift for you, not her. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 07:00 PM Flag
»
DH: It's really not. What must you all think of men?! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 07:06 PM Flag
»
Very few women would see it this way. -np [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 07:17 PM Flag
»
I think most men are great. My dh would never consider giving me underwear as gift for myself unless he was buying me cozy pajamas or something. When he has bought me more sexy lingerie, he fully knows, he is the one getting a gift. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 07:19 PM Flag
»
This [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 07:27 PM Flag
»
UB stands for angry and bitter. I thought you knew that. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 08:04 PM Flag
»
I would hate lingerie from DH as a gift. I’m not a big gift person but how about nice jewelry like earrings or necklace. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.14.19, 02:14 AM Flag
»
If she gets to choose what she buys, it's a gift to her. Cheap baby-dolls from VS are presents for the guy. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 07:16 PM Flag
»
it's like giving her a gift card to buy groceries. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 07:26 PM Flag
»
Not the same at all. You clearly don't enjoy nice lingerie. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 07:44 PM Flag
»
I do. When I wear it for my husband. It's not a gift for me though. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 07:48 PM Flag
»
Agent Provocateur! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 07:15 PM Flag
»
The "missus" guy is NOT OP. I am OP, a woman, just came back after first posting. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 07:44 PM Flag
»
i am a weird size so mostly online (bravissimo, figleaves). i like freya and prima donna. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 06:12 PM Flag
»
Freya and Prima Donna while pretty are meant for heavy-chested ladies, just fyi. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 07:52 PM Flag
»
OR: I am an G cup. so yeah. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 07:55 PM Flag
»
lol. do you think "heavy-chested ladies" are some anomaly? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.14.19, 05:32 AM Flag
»
Oh my gosh this has been one of my main concerns in recent months. I tried Third Love and was really disappointed, did not fit at all (cup size way bigger than should have been). A friend recommended Soma, and I am surprised at how high and...immobile? my breasts are, but I'm wearing sizes that are really tight, almost too tight to be comfortable. My breasts are large and now unfortunately really saggy, so finding cups that don't gape has been challenging. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 06:49 PM Flag
»
Elomi [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 07:02 PM Flag
»
I had the same feeling with Prima Donna. I am only 32D and I felt like I was in some serious military equipment, the straps were that tough. What's your budget? I really love Chantelle Rive Gauche t-shirt bras, they are a good balance of pretty and comfortable. I think they have full coverage ones that won't gape. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 08:05 PM Flag
»
NP: I'm also 32D. I actually buy Natori and Betsey Johnson bras from Amazon - they fit really well. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 09:27 PM Flag
»
I live Chantelle. I am 36E [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.14.19, 09:31 AM Flag
»
Chantelle. I know how they fit so I wait for sales, which are not often but now and then I score something. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 07:09 PM Flag
»
np -- you should sign up for emails from Bare Necessities, they have promotions /sales all the time [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 09:06 PM Flag
»
Thanks, I get them, but they often exclude certain brands. But I do manage to get good stuff sometimes. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 09:17 PM Flag
»
I used to like the cotton wireless bras from Hanro, but they are so expensive, stretch out, and I was always falling out of them when I bent over. Now I like Hanes wireless "comfort evolution". They are not pretty, but they sure are comfy. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 07:22 PM Flag
»
Le mystere [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 08:17 PM Flag
»
I'm trying Spanx and Woford next. Will report back. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 08:36 PM Flag
»
Monoprix, when in France. I'm small and the selection is much better there. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 08:41 PM Flag
»
panache and fantasie, bare necessities [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 09:03 PM Flag
»
+1 Fantasie - especially if you are slim with bigger boobs - was 32E before third child - hope bras still fit after nursing. Regardless, my favorite brand - especially their strapless bra [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.14.19, 03:37 AM Flag
»
36DD, Wacoal, Orchard Corset on Orchard St. That team is amazing. Although I did stumble on Bravissimo in SoHo the other day and bought the best bathing suit of my life (sized by cup size). [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.14.19, 12:08 AM Flag
»
I’ve found many $68 or bras (Wacoal & Natori for example) at TJ Maxx. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.14.19, 10:31 AM Flag
»
I love my Spanx bras. Not sexy, but so comfortable. When I come home, I'm not dying to take it off like my other bras. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.14.19, 01:58 PM Flag
»
I love my Natori bras. I buy them at Nordstrom [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.14.19, 04:04 PM Flag
[ - ] College financial aid mom here. FAFSA and CSS Profile open on October 1. AMA. 29 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 05:14 PM Flag
»
How common is merit aid at good schools? Is it influenced by minority status (even if we have resources to pay in full?) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 05:26 PM Flag
»
op - What's your definition of a "good school"? It's usually not based on demographics, but it could be. Depends on the college. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 05:29 PM Flag
»
OR: Dunno...excellent liberal arts private college/uni? Something like Oberlin, or Amherst, places like that maybe? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 05:35 PM Flag
»
I dont believe Amherst has merit aid, Oberlin prob does. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 06:56 PM Flag
»
Oberlin, yes. Amherst, no. No Ivy League school gives merit money. For other top 20 universities, it is exceedingly rare. Vanderbilt and Duke have merit awards that they give to maybe less than 10 students a year. There are some others. These awards are intended to lure away the the tippy top students who, it is clear, will be getting into Harvard, Yale, Princeton, etc. But students cannot apply to the limited-merit schools with the idea that they're going to get merit. It should be approached as an unexpected bonus. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 06:56 PM Flag
»
OP: That makes sense, and wouldn't be something we'd be chasing - just helpful to know how it works, thanks! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 07:07 PM Flag
»
op- If you search the website of each college, you can see if they offer merit. Or just google [name of college] + merit [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 07:46 PM Flag
»
USC has great merit aid and they give out lots of it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 08:44 PM Flag
»
op - Colleges that are trying to raise their rankings do this. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 09:27 PM Flag
»
Did you attend college? If so, did you receive financial aid when you were in school? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 05:27 PM Flag
»
op - lol. Yes, but cost of attendance was waaaay lower when I went. No, my parents did not apply for financial aid. I think tuition was about $1500/year. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 05:30 PM Flag
»
Why is asking if you attended college an lol thing? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 05:49 PM Flag
»
lol about the financial aid. Because tuition was so low at that time. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 06:57 PM Flag
»
No, thanks. The forms are all easy to fill out, and there are financial aid advisors, who are willing to put their names and faces next to their advice, at all of the schools if we have any specific questions. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 05:40 PM Flag
»
Speak for yourself. I like FA mom. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 06:33 PM Flag
»
Speak for yourself. I like FA mom. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 06:33 PM Flag
»
Do the colleges impute any sort of income to a non-working or low-paid parent? DH is retired (he's old enough -- not slacking). I work 30 hours a week for low pay. Will the colleges think I should be earning more? Or that DH should be working? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 06:14 PM Flag
»
op - No. They take your info at face value. However, whatever DH's income is from his retirement accounts is counted as income. Whatever is on your 1040. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 06:58 PM Flag
»
Thank you. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 07:22 PM Flag
»
Income from retirement accounts but not the balances themselves? So a million bucks in an IRA is better (for us) than a million bucks in non-tax-advantaged investments or savings? Thank you. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 07:26 PM Flag
»
op - Funds in qualified retirement accounts are not counted as assets, except in very unusual circumstances, like if you have $50 million in qualified retirement accounts and zero wages. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 07:48 PM Flag
»
If only... I would gladly pay for college if that could be the situation! Many thanks for responding. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 07:49 PM Flag
»
If we're hoping for merit aid, we shouldn't ED, correct? We won't qualify for FA, but any merit aid would be nice. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 06:35 PM Flag
»
Not financial aid mom but not true, you can definitely receive merit aid when you ED. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 07:00 PM Flag
»
op - In very few cases. Mostly that would be limited to schools that have automatic merit based on scores/GPA posted on their website. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 07:58 PM Flag
»
op - In almost every case correct. Merit is a bribe, it's not reward. It's for the benefit of the college, to get higher-stat students to attend. With ED, the student is already committed. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 07:00 PM Flag
»
Thank you. Just wanted to confirm. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 08:55 PM Flag
»
How many years of financial information is required to share? We are thinking of early retirement and wondering if that would help us with financial aid [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 07:09 PM Flag
»
op - As a standard, one year at a time. You provide your tax info from the calendar year TWO years prior to the start of the academic year for which you are applying for FA. So, for academic year 2020-2021, you'd provide your 2018 tax returns. For academic year 2021-2022, you'd provide your 2019 tax returns. This is the standard. However, sometimes colleges will ask you what your earnings were in the year prior or the year after, especially if you have your own business. Assets are reported as of the date you file the forms. If you are retired, whatever income you take from your retirement savings is still income that is counted. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 07:54 PM Flag
[ - ] Supposedly it's a booming job market. If you want to make a mid career change, where do you look besides linkedin for contacts, personal network, etc? 6 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 04:59 PM Flag
»
What field? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 04:59 PM Flag
»
My background is in top tier investment banking & big company corp deve roles; but have worked for a small, start-up for the past 5 years [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 05:00 PM Flag
»
alum networking too [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 05:12 PM Flag
»
I only ever find jobs through networking. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 05:18 PM Flag
»
This really depends on a lot of factors. Every industry is different, and "mid career" could be anything from teacher to building super to vice president. You need to talk to people in your industry, at your level, and find out what is working. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 05:28 PM Flag
»
+1 Also depends on changing careers or just changing employers. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 06:36 PM Flag
[ - ] For Public HS admissions(in D2), what are good options for a dd who got high 80's on 7th grad report card (but not an 85 in all core subjects, so a number of schools are out) and a 3 and a 4 on state tests? TIA! 7 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
NY Schools 09.13.19, 04:56 PM Flag
»
School of the Future, Millennium [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 06:16 PM Flag
»
Nope on Millennium. Their website says an average of 90. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 06:35 PM Flag
»
and you have to be below 14th street [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 08:03 PM Flag
»
They let in at lest 30% that aren’t below Houston. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 11:42 PM Flag
»
you can still list it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 09:45 PM Flag
»
Museum School. Frank McCourt. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 08:03 PM Flag
»
Harvest Collegiate [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 08:12 PM Flag
[ - ] Our upstairs neighbor wears a lot of perfume and just now I’m getting a big dose of it coming into our windows; it’s an especially pungent and overpowering one. Would you say something to the neighbor or just suck it up and chalk it up to apartment living? I’d like to keep the windows open on this lovely day but our apartment reeks. 51 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 04:56 PM Flag
»
Be thankful it’s not smoke or pot. It’s her apartment...she can wear as much perfume as she likes... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 05:03 PM Flag
»
My neighbor smokes it is awful. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 05:06 PM Flag
»
Op: we get that smell occasionally from some other tenants, lol. I get that she can do what she wants in her own apartment but it’s carrying into other apartments. Kind of like how I rarely cook fish because I know the smell will carry into the hallway of our building. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 05:06 PM Flag
»
If you want to cook fish, cook fish. This is nonsense. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 05:13 PM Flag
»
Op: well, perhaps I’m too considerate of others....guess I should try not giving a damn? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 05:17 PM Flag
»
Yep. You don't even know it would bug them (spoiler alert...it won't). Live your life, in your apartment, as you wish. They'll do the same, perfume and all. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 05:27 PM Flag
»
Maybe pick something in between being too considerate and not giving a damn. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 05:29 PM Flag
»
I would say cooking fish falls well on the normal side of it. She's not blasting death metal while vacuuming, moving furniture, and bowling in her hallways at 2am. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 05:30 PM Flag
»
responder above. Totally agree. Cooking fish is absolutely normal. Weird to avoid it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 05:42 PM Flag
»
np. I would never not cook something because of the smell. Personally I like smelling cooking in the building, it's homey. If you live in an apt, you have to accept a certain amount of smell and noise from neighbors -- just not excessive. If you want to smell nothing and hear nothing from others, go buy a large estate out in the burbs. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 05:46 PM Flag
»
nnp Agree. People downstairs from me must be foodies, because the hall by their door smells amazing. Then I trudge upstairs to my pathetically pedestrian dinners. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 06:47 PM Flag
»
frying fish can be smelly, but just cooking it? it cooks in less than 10 minutes, more like 6 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 05:31 PM Flag
»
Op: I baked cod fillets once and our apartment smelled for hours afterwards, and you could smell it out in the hallway. I like the smell of most food cooking, but fish is in a whole other category. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 08:38 PM Flag
»
NP seconding. Our office put a no fish (and no popcorn) policy in the kitchen. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.14.19, 12:40 AM Flag
»
agree. this is nyc. wtf. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 07:56 PM Flag
»
I would probably enjoy this [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 05:06 PM Flag
»
Me, too. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 05:07 PM Flag
»
Are we weird? Maybe we're weird [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 05:10 PM Flag
»
+2 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.14.19, 06:44 AM Flag
»
Op: trust me, this is not a nice perfume. It is overwhelmingly strong. And I enjoy some good perfumes so it’s not like I’m anti-fragrance [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 05:11 PM Flag
»
why don't you just tell her that you are allergic? I doubt her response would be to use even more perfume. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 05:33 PM Flag
»
She lives on another floor. This is madness - just close your window. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 05:40 PM Flag
»
seriously? if a neighbor told me to stop using a perfume b/c they are allergic I would laugh in their face. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 07:57 PM Flag
»
Ugh, never. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 05:12 PM Flag
»
I'll bet you wear perfume to work. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 05:12 PM Flag
»
Ha joke's on you, I don't work [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 05:31 PM Flag
»
*rolls eyes* [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 05:35 PM Flag
»
it's okay. Not everyone can be me. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 06:00 PM Flag
»
You work. You just call it "marriage". [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.14.19, 08:55 AM Flag
»
Hold up. What’s wrong with wearing perfume to work? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.14.19, 11:53 AM Flag
»
You have an issue with perfume from another floor?????? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 05:12 PM Flag
»
We all have our windows open I’m sure, so I think when she sprayed it the smell was carried with the breeze into our apartment. When our windows are closed I never smell anything. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 05:13 PM Flag
»
Presumably it won’t be done again today. Won’t it wear off? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.14.19, 12:40 AM Flag
»
Sounds like you have a choice to make. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 05:13 PM Flag
»
Op: wasn’t sure, so that’s why I’m asking others t get a sense of what they would do [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 05:15 PM Flag
»
OR: I mean a choice between closing your windows, and dealing with the smell. Those are the only two choices (or I guess opening the window, but pointing a fan at it to keep the fresh air out, but then what's the point?) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 05:28 PM Flag
»
That’s what I do when my neighbor smokes pot and blows it out the window. Hate that smell. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 05:34 PM Flag
»
Love the smell of weed. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 05:36 PM Flag
»
To each her own. I don’t mind turning around the fan now and then. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 05:39 PM Flag
»
are you my neighbor? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 07:58 PM Flag
»
Maybe it’s an air freshener or similar cleaning or room scenting product? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 05:33 PM Flag
»
Deb? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 05:57 PM Flag
»
Oh no....it wasn't me posting above but I am highly chemically sensitive ...and my name is Deb....and I did ask people to try to avoid scents in my workplace. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.14.19, 12:53 PM Flag
»
You are too picky for apartment living. Close your window or buy the heavy duty odor eaters. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 06:10 PM Flag
»
I'd probably get an air purifier and position it where the smell comes in. I don't think you can ask someone to stop wearing perfume. IMO, a noisy neighbor would be worse. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 06:28 PM Flag
»
Are you certain it's something she's wearing on her person? Could she have dropped and broken the bottle? It's hard to imagine someone wearing so much perfume that the smell wafts out one window and into one a floor away. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 07:47 PM Flag
»
Op: wow, can’t believe this is still on the first page! I’ve experienced this before whenever windows are open.....and whenever I pass by her in the common areas she always smells very strongly of this perfume. It seems from these responses that I’m the only one here who is bothered by strong overpowering perfume. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 08:35 PM Flag
»
NP: It is hard to believe that someone wears so much perfume that it can be smelled on another floor through an open window. I think you're overly sensitive. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 08:40 PM Flag
»
Op: perhaps, but when dh is home he’s commented on the smell before. It is not your typical perfume smell, it is POTENT. And on a windy day I can smell other stuff from others’ apartments, such as cigarette smoke or pot. Why would a strong perfume not carry like these other smells do? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.13.19, 08:58 PM Flag
»
NP UB posted perfume hate before, scent free work/school, etc. so this is not that. You're either bizarrely sensitive and need to see a doctor, or architectural anatomy? That said probably two things you can't change, and why shouldn't someone be able to speak up? Doesn't mean your neighbor will change but at least you can let her know? Maybe something like play dumb and the next time you see your neighbor ask if there's a potent spray or something because it's causing some migraines in your home. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.14.19, 12:40 AM Flag
»
I live in a brownstone with a small yard. My neighbor wears a ton of cologne and I can smell it in my kitchen. Every time I go in my yard he is there and the smell is so strong. It is awful but nothing you can do about it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.14.19, 09:41 AM Flag
Refresh » New Post »
close [X]

close [X]

Select a Category (only 1)

category
Stages
Regions