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[ - ] I’ve never recycled because I’m lazy and now it’s justified 2 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:27 AM Flag
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They got greedy and killed the golden goose. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:27 AM Flag
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what? I'm away and I think I missed a news story today. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 02:10 AM Flag
[ - ] Would you be upset or concerned if your 75yo mom stayed with your sick 12yo (cold) all day while you are at work and when you get home at 5:30, 12yo has not eaten anything all day except breakfast you gave her & a milkshake (gmom got for 12yo at McDonalds when she went on lunch run)? Mom said 12yo never told her she was hungry. 56 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:16 AM Flag
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No, I'd expect to vocalize if she was hungry. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:19 AM Flag
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*the 12 year old---- geez I'm the worst at multitasking here. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:19 AM Flag
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Come ON [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:34 AM Flag
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Even if "not hungry" the grownup should find something the child can eat. A bowl of soup perhaps? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:35 AM Flag
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At McDonalds? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:37 AM Flag
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Pick up a can of soup on lunch run, perhaps? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:47 AM Flag
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Can't the 12 year old walk to the kitchen and grab something in there without having to make the elderly grandmother make two stops? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:52 AM Flag
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Well, studying baby monitors while folding laundry and preventing fires is a *lot* to do! Perhaps I should hire a sitter while I respond on here. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:37 AM Flag
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A 12 yo with a cold can feed herself. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:19 AM Flag
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^ and she got her a milkshake! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:20 AM Flag
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Yes. I'd be concerned about why DD wasn't eating. Does she have body image issues? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:20 AM Flag
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No, she usually eats [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:23 AM Flag
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No. She is 12 and I am sure she is fine. Not a baby would can't walk into the kitchen herself. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:20 AM Flag
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The reason they say "feed a cold (starve a fever)" is because you don't feel hungry when you're stuffed up. Don't worry, DD will be fine without lunch for one day. Give her some chicken soup and GL! Also, on the bright side: nice that your mom is willing to babysit [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:24 AM Flag
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It's a cold. Give me break. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:25 AM Flag
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+1. How nice OP has a mom willing to babysit a sick kid! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:26 AM Flag
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What are you feeling about this, OP? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:23 AM Flag
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Surprised my mom did not prepare or get her anything to eat. 12yo feels bad and was in bed most of the day. I think she would have felt better if she had eaten. I made dinner when I got home and she did eat [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:27 AM Flag
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Thank goodness she did not die of starvation. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:28 AM Flag
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You really don’t get it [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:36 AM Flag
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Yes, I do. You are a moron who is also an ungrateful daughter. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:38 AM Flag
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No, I am concerned she is in early stages of dementia [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:41 AM Flag
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Offs [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:53 AM Flag
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or: ok. Honestly, I am guessing there is more baggage here with you and your mom. You mom did you a solid by watching your sick kid. You are chasing to focus on this instead of being grateful. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:29 AM Flag
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No, I am not mad with her. Just concerned. Her mind/actions seem different in the past year. In the past she would have been concerned if dd did not eat all day, especially when sick [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:34 AM Flag
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Ah gotcha. She's probably just tired. Of course her minds and actions are different. She's aging! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:37 AM Flag
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No. 12 year old DD can fend for herself even with a cold. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:24 AM Flag
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Contrary opinion- if there was an adult in the house doing a lunch run, I would expect them to ask. But I can’t imagine my mom eating without asking my DC. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:25 AM Flag
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Yes, concerned she didn’t ask or encourage dd to eat. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:31 AM Flag
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Maybe your mom has a bit of dementia. She's 75! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:35 AM Flag
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That is my concern. She lives alone and says she needs no help [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:38 AM Flag
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OR Though one other thing I have noticed about my mom is that as she grows older she is not interested in a lot of things. Does not spare a thought for things she would have been really sensitive towards. No dementia. Assumed it was just fatigue in some ways. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:51 AM Flag
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So, no dementia, but more selfish? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:54 AM Flag
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Yes though am not sure I would call it selfish. I figure she is old (87) and has a right to figure out what she wants to invest her emotions in. But yes you could call it self absorbed [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:56 AM Flag
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their worlds become smaller [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 02:00 AM Flag
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Yes. That is a nice way to put it. Thank you. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 02:03 AM Flag
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Maybe because she knew the kid had a cold and really should be at school. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:35 AM Flag
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Nice. Spread those germs, please [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:39 AM Flag
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You get exposed to more going on the subway. Or breathing. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:43 AM Flag
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A 12 y/o can make sure they eat when they are hungry. Also, was the sick kid actually hungry? I lose my appetite when I’m not feeling well, same with my 14 y/o. It’s how I know she’s really sick - she takes 2 hour naps without prompting and has no appetite. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:28 AM Flag
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Yeah, I would probably not have my mom babysit again. My grandmother stayed with me after school at that age and always had food for me [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:31 AM Flag
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She's 75. No, don't get angry. She isn't thinking the way younger people do. You should be happy she's around and gives some comfort. Had your 12yo (certainly old enough to say, Gram, I'm hungry!) voiced this, wouldn't she have acted on it. I was taking care of myself by age 12. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:35 AM Flag
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I hope 75 year old mom does not get sick! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:41 AM Flag
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She stayed away from dd so hopefully she will be fine [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:42 AM Flag
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I have to laugh. My 73 year old mom watched my 13 ye old DS on Saturday when he wasn’t sick. He didn’t eat dinner because he wasn’t hungry. It gave me some pause but I figure he has to learn to fend for himself at some point [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:49 AM Flag
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No [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:52 AM Flag
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You aren’t imagining it. That’s what started happening with my mom...just started doing things I thought were weird, out of character. And after a while, I became so hurt by strange behavior, I overlooked possibility that it was neurological. Turns out, she had been having dozens of small strokes and two significant ones over several years. Things got really bad before I took her to doctor...but good news is, from major medical interventions, mother is closer to herself than she was. And has become the grandmother I had always wished she would be! Get mom checked out, trust your gut... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:55 AM Flag
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How did you realize it was neurological? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:58 AM Flag
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Because when my father died, when not once did she ask me how I was feeling, I knew there was a serious problem. I also realized she wasn’t seeing peripherally, which was big clue stroke was involved. She denied any vision changes, or any problems, for,that matter. In her care, there was also heart failure, which was exacerbating neurological issues by depriving brain of oxygen [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 02:22 PM Flag
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Surprised any of those medical problems were treatable. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 03:33 PM Flag
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NP I agree with this poster. My mother is 75 and this would be very out of character for her. I would take her to the doctor. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 02:37 AM Flag
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Why is it weird? I would not expect my mom to offer food. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 02:43 AM Flag
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Who gets hungry when they’re sick?? I have no appetite when I’m ill. Why force feed your kid? If she wasn’t hungry she wasn’t hungry. The end. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 04:26 AM Flag
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No. Both grandma and kid may have been sort of intimidated by each other. We asked my parents to take care of our 2 pre-teen kids recently. They hadn't spent time alone with them since they were smaller. Grandma readily confessed afterwards that she felt intimidated by how big and different her grand-kids were to her. Grandparents retreated to their bedroom after dinner - kids were in theirs doing homework. Younger one texted us to say that she wanted a cuddle from grandma but that she had retreated to her bedroom. Kid didn't dare knock on her door to ask for bedtime cuddle. Kids change so much around that age - as their parents we don't realize that. Other adults may feel taken aback : kids look so grownup all the sudden, so grandparents assume that they are all autonomous and all. Just my perspective. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:11 PM Flag
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Part of aging is becoming more and more self-absorbed. Can be hard to distinguish from subtle neurologic decline. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 02:59 PM Flag
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You need a Russian grandma! She would have made the chicken soup, stuffed your DD with it and all sorts of other food and by the end of the day, the DD would have been cured. Seriously. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 03:59 PM Flag
[ - ] is anyone hearing about a high profile college counselor apparently resigning/forced out from a big name private? lots of buzz about another scandal 4 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:16 AM Flag
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Which school??? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:25 AM Flag
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Name the school. Just give us an initial. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 02:11 AM Flag
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Is it related to the Singer case? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 02:12 AM Flag
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Fieldston ? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 03:03 AM Flag
[ - ] Anyone know what it’s like to live as an expat in instanbul or Mumbai? Random, I know. Thanks! 12 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:06 AM Flag
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Istanbul is non-stop traffic and tourists year round. I would not live there. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:07 AM Flag
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NP: I loved it so much when I went there. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:11 AM Flag
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I did not. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:13 AM Flag
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Where did you stay? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:13 AM Flag
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At a Hilton. In November. Non-stop traffic and packed with tourists in the off season. Can't imagine what high season is like. Nightmare. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:17 AM Flag
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That's too bad. We were there the end of September a few years ago, stayed at the Kempinski and it was amazing. But I could see how it could be overwhelming. I just thought it was amazingly beautiful. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:31 AM Flag
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Meh. Not really. Many more beautiful places in the world worth visiting and living in. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:33 AM Flag
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^^Not too mention the fact that Turkey is not the most stable country and is quite anti-American at the moment. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:42 AM Flag
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same!! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 02:43 AM Flag
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+1 I can't wait to go back [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 03:47 PM Flag
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Mumbai has its issues but as an expat you would love like a queen. And you will meet some amazingly warm people. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 02:07 AM Flag
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Why do you ask this question over and over? Just a bored morning, mommy? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:06 PM Flag
[ - ] Does anyone know of any rowing clubs for teens in NYC? 9 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:58 AM Flag
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If only Lori Laughlin was a NYer. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:59 AM Flag
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lol [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 04:39 AM Flag
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Do you ever see rowers on the Hudson or East or Harlem Rivers? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:05 AM Flag
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np-actually there are programs, see below [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:13 AM Flag
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Google is your friend: https://rownewyork.org/programs/ [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:11 AM Flag
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sure here, there is a great program for lower income kids too, which is great. https://rownewyork.org [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:12 AM Flag
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It’s cold. The water is dirty and it isn’t great for practice. But yes there supposedly are. I came from a good program and took one look and walked the other way. Sadly (for me because i love rowing) i became a runner. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 02:22 AM Flag
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Me too! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 07:20 AM Flag
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Me too! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 07:20 AM Flag
[ - ] Any good summer camps on the UWS people can recommend for a 5 year old boy? 7 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
New York City 03.19.19, 12:56 AM Flag
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JCC [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:03 AM Flag
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Central Park runs a camp for kids-- they're outside the entire time regardless of temps, though. Elite gymnastics has camp, Natural History has one, etc. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:06 AM Flag
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Kidville, NYKidsClub [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:07 AM Flag
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ACT Programs at St. John the Divine [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:36 AM Flag
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this! their summer camp is great. they even throw in swimming lessons! (or at least they did when my ds went there.) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 02:11 AM Flag
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There's bus service to Chelsea Piers. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 02:33 AM Flag
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COSA for soccer [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 02:17 PM Flag
[ - ] We went to our neighbors party Saturday night. (we live in a townhouse, they are in the townhouse next door). We left our sons, sleeping, alone at home, brought the monitor (we could see & hear them) and took turns checking in on them every 30 minutes ish. Some of the other parents were SO judgmental. Our home + the house next door is literally smaller than most suburban homes. I'm confused what the problem is? 161 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:48 AM Flag
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people are jerks, and there was a recent horror novel about this very thing (they might have mistaken it for non-fiction). don't let the bastards grind you down! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:49 AM Flag
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THIS. The kids were fine and I would (and have done) the exact same. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:51 AM Flag
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how old are the kids? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:17 PM Flag
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Next time, don't tell them. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:51 AM Flag
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seriously! They said "who is watching the kids" and I told the truth. Next time I'm going to be like, oh my mom is sleeping over. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:52 AM Flag
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They were probably judgmental because it is illegal. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:52 AM Flag
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Hey, partygoer! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:52 AM Flag
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She asked why they were judgmental. I was being honest. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:53 AM Flag
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OR also I wasn't judging her. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:54 AM Flag
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sure you weren't. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:01 AM Flag
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I don't care what she does. But she should keep it under her hat if she is doing stuff like this - especially if she plans to have playdates with these people in the future. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:04 AM Flag
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So you are judging. Why not admit it? You really think she would leave playdates awake, home alone. You are psycho. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:09 AM Flag
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I am saying that people with little kids who are judging her at the party are not going to be thrilled to drop off playdates. I have older kids now, I honestly don't care what she does. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:10 AM Flag
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I'll judge. Don't leave very small children alone in house. Period. No party is worth it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 03:08 PM Flag
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Is it illegal to sit in your backyard when your children are upstairs sleeping? B/C I guarantee your yard is further away than we were from our children. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:53 AM Flag
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So you want to argue? I am not talking about distances. I thought you wanted to know why people didn't approve? If you already knew and didn't care, then why post here? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:55 AM Flag
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I'm asking a serious question - are either of these things illegal? Seems silly. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:55 AM Flag
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If you are on your own property or even in your own detached garage, that is very different from being in someone else's house. I am not judging you, I am just letting you know why they said something. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:02 AM Flag
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I just looked up the laws & there is literally nothing that says that is illegal in nyc. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:03 AM Flag
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np: leaving your children home alone with no supervision is certainly case for negligence. People misuse and misunderstand the concept of "illegal"...you can not leave a 2 yo home alone, whether it's illegal or not. If something happened, you would certainly be prosecuted for some crimes. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:05 AM Flag
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But what could happen if she was say, sitting on her front steps (her property) or right next door, feet away? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:06 AM Flag
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It doesn't really matter. In one situation she would be fine, in the other she would be in jail. That is how the law is sometimes. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:16 AM Flag
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No, in either situation, she would not be in jail. Jesus. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:23 AM Flag
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why do you keep saying Jesus and Christ? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:27 AM Flag
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It is negligence, and she wouldn't even be able to claim she didn't know better since she both took the baby monitor AND went back to check every 30 minutes. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:34 AM Flag
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No, negligence would be, just heading next door without checking in whatsoever. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:35 AM Flag
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This. You can't claim ignorance if you took the baby monitor. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:35 AM Flag
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Thank you for clarifying. If you are wealthy, chances are low you would be prosecuted unless there was a fire and your kids died. Then, you would be prosecuted. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:07 AM Flag
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np from above: yes. for sure. Or an intruder. I actually read a novel with this storyline. Parents next door and baby is snatched from crib. If that happened, they would press charges for child endangerment, etc., even though not illegal. The other issue that people focus on less, which is always my concern when I step away or leave my tween home alone is something happening to YOU and you are the only person who knows child is home alone. E.g., you have a heart attack on the front steps, car crash while running to get takeout, etc. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:09 AM Flag
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Christ almighty. How do go about your day? You could get hit by a bus or have a heart attack or terrorists could attack any time. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:11 AM Flag
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It certainly is a lot of pressure to be a single parent and the only person responsible for children's welfare, yes. So when I leave them alone and I'm driving when they were much smaller, I'd text my sister where I was going. Have a great night. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:14 AM Flag
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you are missing the point [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:14 AM Flag
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True, but there was 2 of us and our neighbors knew what was up. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:12 AM Flag
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I once read a novel about a zombie apocalypse. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:14 AM Flag
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Head over to my place-- I've got loads of canned corn and batteries for the baby monitors. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:17 AM Flag
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But they WERE being supervised. They had a monitor on them and checked on them regularly. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:48 AM Flag
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YES! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:53 AM Flag
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This oerson is clueless. It is NT illegal. At least not in NY. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 04:31 AM Flag
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Remind me to bring back your casserole dish, Judgmental Judy. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:54 AM Flag
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LOL, not illegal in NYC. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:54 AM Flag
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just looked up the laws, not illegal. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:58 AM Flag
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Child endangerment is a state law, but it is legal in NYS. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 04:32 AM Flag
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Is it actually illegal? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:55 AM Flag
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That’s not why. You think nobody at that party commits crimes routinely? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:56 AM Flag
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np: um, do you know a lot of people who commit crimes routinely? Are you joking? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:16 AM Flag
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Sheriff Mom is back in town! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:58 AM Flag
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She asked why! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:08 AM Flag
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It is absolutely NOT illegal. Find the law. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 04:30 AM Flag
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Someone will always judge your parenting. Patch up that thick skin and carry on. You do you. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:52 AM Flag
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The Madeline McCann documentary on Netflix is popular right now. That might be why they were judgmental. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:57 AM Flag
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two words: Madeleine. McCann. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:57 AM Flag
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But that was in a hotel, w/no monitor, in an unknown place. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:59 AM Flag
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hotel and house are not that different. it's not that hard to disable monitor. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:01 AM Flag
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so, someone is stalking my husband, me and children, waiting for the night, we go, literal 12 feet next door, to a party. Then they sneak in, our locked door and steal our children, during the 30 minutes we left them alone. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:03 AM Flag
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If you have someone stalking you, I'd say leaving your children unattended is the least of your issues. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:05 AM Flag
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come. on. the scenarios are not comparable at all. this was a hotel where much of the staff knew the children would be alone and it was much further. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 02:07 PM Flag
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You remember her name 12 years later. That’s because what happened to her is extremely rare, not extremely common. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:08 AM Flag
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perhaps. but that would be enough reason for me not to leave my child alone in the house. Hire a HS kid to babbysit. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:32 AM Flag
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Exactly! I bet you can't name 4 kids from the Sandy Hook shooting. Yet nobody is judging their friends that don't vote for candidates that fight for gun restrictions. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:33 AM Flag
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I'm in NYC and will occasionally leave my sleeping kids in my locked apartment with the monitors and safety measures in place to go do laundry in the basement or get the mail when my DH is out of town. How is this any different than what OP is doing? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:57 AM Flag
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oh when we were in an apt building - people judged us for this shit too! I always told the doorman, just in case something happen they could get the kids out. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:58 AM Flag
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I find that the people who consistently make it a point to throw judgement on my parenting choices are the ones without kids or the moms so deeply unhappy with their own lives that they need a target or distraction. It hurts. It's exhausting, but 9 times out of 10 it's them projecting their own issues on you. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:02 AM Flag
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What happen to the day parents were allowed to use their best judgment w/their children? Kidnapping isn't more common now than it was in the 70s, but kids had a lot more free rein. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:04 AM Flag
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So, I actually went to school with a boy who was kidnapped and subsequently murdered (Jimmy Ryce) when I was in elementary school, and now having my own kids and much to my mother's horror, I'm pretty relaxed with my kids and letting them have independence within reason. Again, I've left my kids in my apartment alone while in the building (basement, other apartments, etc.) and as long as you're smart about it, there's not much that's going to happen unexpectedly. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:11 AM Flag
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We didn't know when these things happened in another town. Now we do. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 03:10 PM Flag
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You think in a fire the doorman is gong to save your kids? Sorry. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 03:09 PM Flag
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Running out to change a load of laundry or pick up the mail is very different from going to your neighbors and hanging out there with the baby monitor. Did you go hang out in the next building with your baby monitor? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:05 AM Flag
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I'd argue the basement of a large high rise is much further away than 2 small townhouses in nyc. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:07 AM Flag
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It isn't the distance though. The distance isn't the issue. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:13 AM Flag
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What IS the issue then? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:30 AM Flag
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It is a different property, different home, different house. It is just the way it is. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:38 AM Flag
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Says who? If someone lives in a 5,000 square foot home with a bedroom on the entire other side of the home, or someone goes next door to a party and is 15 feet away, how is the latter more dangerous? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:40 AM Flag
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Answered so many times on this thread. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:46 AM Flag
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not with a valid reason. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:49 AM Flag
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The latter isn't more dangerous. It just *feels* more dangerous to a bunch of stupid people on here. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:53 AM Flag
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No, one is a quick errand, coming right back. They were hanging out for hours, presumably drinking and having fun. Not same. But it's their kids. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 03:11 PM Flag
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What a load of bullshit. Of course distance is a factor. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:51 AM Flag
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Agreed. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:14 AM Flag
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It’s not. It’s just as bad. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:06 AM Flag
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Just as bad? Because I'm washing their clothes and not hovering over them making sure they're breathing? When am I supposed to do laundry? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:14 AM Flag
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But what, what if, there was a fire, in the 12 minutes it takes you to run downstairs and throw in a load of laundry!? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:22 AM Flag
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I think most people in NYC did/do what OR did. I know some people stopped after 9-11, they decided they were not comfortable with it after that. I live in an area that had a large gas explosion, people who ran out of their houses were not able to get back in to save anyone because the fires hit so fast. I don't judge OR or OP. I don't think OR is wrong, but I would make different choices if I were OP. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:25 AM Flag
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Of course something COULD happen! A tree could fall on your house, on to your baby's room. A car could drive into your living room while your whole family watches tv. All of these things are SO rare! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:28 AM Flag
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OP wants to feel good about her decision to leave her kid home alone. That is her deal. It makes a difference if it is her neighbor's house which is closer or her sister's house which is gigantic. That is just how it works. She is okay with the risk being small of something happening. She wanted to know why other people judged her for her choice and people are telling her. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:31 AM Flag
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The point is, people judge for asinine shit and b/c they LOVE to judge. Dumbass judgments like this & public shaming is how Trump got elected. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:32 AM Flag
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and we are off the deep end here. Did this really happen or are you trying to make MP, OP? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:35 AM Flag
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No, people judge because in life bad things happen. Very small chance something happens, but huge consequences if it does. She is willing to take that risk. I would not. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 03:12 PM Flag
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+ I also couldn't relax at party. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 03:12 PM Flag
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That started in my apartment? How? I have four children-- my place is the f*cking Fort Knox of child safety plugs and contraptions. We also live in a building with fire proof walls so even if the neighbors had a fire, it would be more risky to leave our apartment and head towards the stairs (just like those two gentlemen who passed away a few years ago under the same circumstances) than to stay in our apartment. There's a lot of 'what if' scenarios that can happen in this world, but a majority can be prevented through common sense, so before I change the load, I remove the knife my kid usually sleeps with in bed. :) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:28 AM Flag
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Oh the fire comment was me, the OP, I was being facetious! Of course a fire isn't going to start! A fire could also start when you are in a deep sleep and on the other side of the house or apt! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:29 AM Flag
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ILY, OP! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:46 AM Flag
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no, ILY!! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:51 AM Flag
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lol [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:53 AM Flag
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Yes, but you are inside to get kids out. I have lived through a fire. Ask the FD what they think and get back to me. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 03:13 PM Flag
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lol [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:32 AM Flag
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Well that doesn't sound particularly brilliant either. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:15 AM Flag
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You're right. I should have turned off the gas stove, kicked the drug fueled-orgy-loving bikes out and turned off the faucets after unplugging the drains so they'd stop overflowing. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:22 AM Flag
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Ugh, people are such idiots these days. You didn't do anything wrong. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:04 AM Flag
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Maddy McCain...: [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:04 AM Flag
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Was left in a hotel room, several nights in a row, w/no baby monitor. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:05 AM Flag
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Twelve years ago. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:10 AM Flag
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In a foreign country [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:39 AM Flag
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You think the US is safer than many 'foreign countries?' [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:45 AM Flag
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Oh my good God. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:46 AM Flag
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Probably not, but I'm assuming it would be a "perfect storm" of events for someone who is 1-2 houses in their own street in America would suddenly have a stalker kidnap their kid. The only thing that would worry me, is that I once found my neighbor's toddler on the street b/c the girl awoke to an empty house and went out looking for her mom. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:55 AM Flag
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It was Portugal. I’m willing to bet Portugal is generally safer than the US. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 08:29 AM Flag
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WellI I guess, chances are your kids would be fine. That said, why couldn't you just have hired a sitter to save you from going back every 30 minutes? are you poor or just cheap? I"m ok with being called judgemental on this, I could call you names but they would be worse. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:13 AM Flag
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I'm not hiring a sitter to go next door to a party. Our houses are connected. Seriously - when I go to my sister's house in the burbs, her basement w/her movie theatre is much further away than I was from my kids Saturday. Our baby monitor doesn't even work from the basement to the guest room there. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:20 AM Flag
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Why not hire a sitter? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:24 AM Flag
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You're right, next time I'm at my sister's house and we want to watch a movie in her basement movie theatre, I'll hire a sitter to sit upstairs w/our sleeping children. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:27 AM Flag
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you're being willfully obtuse now. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:30 AM Flag
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I think you are. You know the only difference b/w 20 feet in your own house, and 20 feet away at the neighbors is semantics, not safety. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:31 AM Flag
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I was a np in that string btw...it's not semantics. I genuinely disagree. It is a different home and that's the differences. Walls and doors and locks. Sure you can argue it's comparable and maybe it feels that way, but you seem dogged in proving this point to yourself rather than actually understanding how others could have a different perspective. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:34 AM Flag
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But a large home in the suburbs has just as many "safety" issues as 2 homes, next door to each other. I'm genuinely not sure what the difference is, outside of you just saying it is. A different home? A different floor? Why does it matter? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:36 AM Flag
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NP By law, one is child neglect and the other is not. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:42 AM Flag
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negligence sorry [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:42 AM Flag
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No it isn't. Look up child neglect laws in NYC - neither is illegal. You are just assuming it it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:43 AM Flag
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It is negligence to leave a baby home alone. Is the police going to come and arrest OP? No. If something happened to the baby while she was next door for 30 min at a party? Yes, she would be charged. Unless she is so rich that she can get out of it, which may be possible. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:45 AM Flag
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But WHY is it negligence?! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:50 AM Flag
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Because it is, and that's enough. We live in a society with norms and laws an rules and one of them is you don't leave your house with your kids unsupervised inside. I get you want to debate, but you are debating yourself. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 02:00 AM Flag
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THIS [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 02:08 AM Flag
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They should not judge you but I will say in all honesty that I envy you. I am a worrier and could not do that. I know it is irrational, but that's just how I am. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:14 AM Flag
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You are not irrational. If anything happened, she would be going to prison. Most likely nothing will happen but your gut is not letting you down on this one. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:19 AM Flag
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+1 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:24 AM Flag
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You are irrational. It must suck to be you. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:27 AM Flag
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Some of the judgmental responses are ridiculous. You may not leave your kid alone for 30 minutes but kid/teen suicide has like quadrupled in the past few decades. I'd argue giving your kids some fucking space is better for them than living entirely way far up their ass. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:25 AM Flag
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wow this is a terrible attempt to correlate too entirely unrelated constructs. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:38 AM Flag
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Disagree. Parents are WAY too anxious about everything regarding their children. From SIDS to general toddler safety, to getting into an ivy. They don't ever let their kids fall or fail and they have no coping skills. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:42 AM Flag
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ok well that had nothing to do with teen suicide and leaving children unsupervised. please, as psychologist, don't go making ridiculous statements trying to correlate issues that don't relate. All sorts of theories about uptick in suicide, namely technology isolation and LACK of quality relationship attachment with parents and others. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:45 AM Flag
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Yes, toddlers should be allowed to FAIL and to COPE!!! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:47 AM Flag
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THIS! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:51 AM Flag
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THIS! whatever is causing suicides its not getting a sitter for little kids. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:46 AM Flag
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+ 1 million [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:48 AM Flag
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Preach! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:55 AM Flag
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Sounds fine to me. I used to do this in FL. We had front yard parties and I'd be 2 doors down and had my monitor. I'd check and dh would. I get it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:38 AM Flag
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Can someone tell me, what exactly IS wrong with this? I understand the sentiment, "it is 2 homes!" but actually, WHY is that a problem? OP brought a baby monitor, let the neighbors in on what was happening, and she and her husband took turns checking in. Why is any of this wrong? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:38 AM Flag
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Just honestly asking, OP, if you had a nanny and they took one of your kids to your neighbor's for a playdate, with the baby monitor, and left the other sleeping, would you be okay with that? Even if they came back every 30 min to check on the one who was sleeping? Would that really be okay with you? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:40 AM Flag
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If they were at our neighbors next door & told me and the neighbor about it. I would not care one bit. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:40 AM Flag
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Okay. Are you from the US? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:43 AM Flag
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Yup! From a NYC burb. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:44 AM Flag
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Ok. So you really didn't know why people would judge you about it. But you see now that people have different views on it? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:46 AM Flag
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np: she's being willfully obtuse. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:47 AM Flag
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that explains it [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 02:11 AM Flag
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"100 abductions a year by strangers...gun related deaths, 3,143 kids". People are so fucking stupid. Just b/c something "feels" dangerous, doesn't mean it is. Your kid is far more likely to die in a school shooting than you going over to the fucking neighbors. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:48 AM Flag
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+10101903903903939 million [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:50 AM Flag
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okay, go to the fucking neighbors then. But don't be surprised if people think you are a crappy mom. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 02:07 AM Flag
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everything you said except if something 'feels' dangerous it probably is. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:21 PM Flag
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You’re either a troll or somethings off your story. If you had the monitor where you could see and hear everything, why return to check in? Doesn’t make sense. Either way, I wouldn’t have gone or would’ve gotten a sitter. If your story is true, how the hell did u enjoy yourself? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 02:22 AM Flag
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gas leak [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:00 PM Flag
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How old are your kids? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 02:27 AM Flag
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+++ HOW OLD ARE KIDS??? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 03:06 PM Flag
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The problem is you’re dampening everyone elses fun. They cannot really let loose and kick back knowing a baby is on the line. How can they indulge in drink or get carried away with noise? Might miss the sound of a baby choking. Yeesh. Who wants that worry at a party? It makes you look really cheap, and like a poor planner, too. Such an important, precious part of your life, is it really that hard to get a sitter? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 03:06 AM Flag
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The show What would you do? covered this. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 03:08 AM Flag
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while we never did so, we had lots of friends do this when we lived in row houses in DC. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 03:31 AM Flag
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I have lived in an apartment building that had a terrible fire in the basement that spread up the building. I would never leave a young child alone in a house or apartment for that reason. Abductions are not the danger, they are very rare. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:17 PM Flag
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I see nothing wrong with this, and definitely wouldn't have hired a babysitter to go next door, but I have also left my sleeping kids in the house while I ran to the store, did laundry, walked the dog, etc. so I guess I would get yelled at too. I think the people who are saying what you did was illegal and you'd get arrested, are unhinged. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:12 PM Flag
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And I think you are a bad mother so there's that [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:26 PM Flag
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My kids would tell you that I'm a great mother, but thanks for letting us know you are one of the unhinged. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:53 PM Flag
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This is the plot of a novel I read a year ago, The Couple Next Door. The couple comes to a dinner party in the house next door with the baby monitor on. Their child is abducted. It's actually the plot of more than one novel and several Lifetime horror movies. I think you may be lifting it from there for entertainment's sake. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 02:39 PM Flag
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I would not worry about abduction as much as fire. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 03:07 PM Flag
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Nothing wrong here IMO. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 03:30 PM Flag
[ - ] Anyone going to SI Tech? 2 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:45 AM Flag
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no black people--well, one. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 02:44 AM Flag
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My neighbor. We live in lower Manhattan. It was his 2nd choice. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 04:40 AM Flag
[ - ] I feel like the loser in my family for always insisting that we sit down at the table, no electronics or other distractions, for dinner. No one really does it for more than the 5-10 mins it takes them to eat, no one cares least of all dh... sad 29 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:41 AM Flag
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Maybe have a designated dinner one night a week - Sunday or Saturday or even a breakfast/brunch as a designated no electronic meal? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:42 AM Flag
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My God, they walk around glued to their phones/ipads 24/7. What's one meal a day? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:54 AM Flag
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I find this so sad. Literally every piece of research demonstrates zero benefit of kids focusing on screens. So detrimental to their mental health. Why would people allow at the dinner table!? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:15 AM Flag
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No! Maybe one big dinner, but no electronics at dinner EVER. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 04:40 AM Flag
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I insist on this once or twice a week. The rest of the week, I don’t care. But then we have a nice time the once Or twice a week we pull it off. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:46 AM Flag
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Op/ I guess too much to ask to do it daily? I thought it was bad enough that it’s the one time of day we’re All together under one roof [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:50 AM Flag
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Don't back down. Just don't make such a thing about it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:55 AM Flag
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We do it, its nbd. As you said it's short, we talk, they eat and everyone survives. I think they actually appreciate it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:53 AM Flag
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We do this almost every night. Worth it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 02:45 AM Flag
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That’s a shame. We have family dinner six nights a week, no gadgets and good conversation. It’s not too late to turn this around, but you do need dh on the same page. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:57 AM Flag
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np: same here. I am single mom with two kids and we have actual dinner every night of the week (unless we go out), seated at the table, no toys or distractions. We talk about our days, life, current events, whatever. Sometimes they are long and fun. Sometimes shorter and everyone is tired. Meal time is such important family time. When else do you all come together. It's a reconnection and a touchstone moment during busy lives. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:03 AM Flag
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I’m w my kids from 3-9pm every day after school and all weekend. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:45 AM Flag
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Are you OP? and? Does that mean you shouldn't have dinner together? I am too, btw, the single mom np. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:48 AM Flag
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Op. That wasn’t me [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:55 AM Flag
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Not OP. I’m not saying you shouldn’t have dinner together, but I don’t feel the need to sit down w them every night since I have already spent three hours w them prior to dinner. Also, we still read together every night at bed time. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:58 AM Flag
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Different strokes. Meal time is critically important, developmentally. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 02:03 AM Flag
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I agree, different strokes. The poster I was replying to said, “ when else do you all come together?”...so I was talking to that. Critically important for what type of development? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 02:54 AM Flag
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You're not a loser and I would keep it up if I were you. No phones or tablets when we eat, either. How old are your kids? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:02 AM Flag
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Op. 11, 8 and 4. Dh is the least cooperative honestly [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:56 AM Flag
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what does he do exactly? Ask him gently to retire phone for 2-3 hours during evening time so you two can focus on children. It's really not a lot to ask. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 02:01 AM Flag
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I do the same thing. “No toys at the table.” It’s always been this way and we do talk to each other. That said, we only have dinner as a family two or three nights a week, at most. DH travels for work frequently and DC is in high school & plays travel sports. On the nights we do get to eat together, we have a lot to talk about. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:09 AM Flag
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It would not even cross my mind to have electronics at the dinner table - and yes, we have dinner together at the table almost every night. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:13 AM Flag
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Same. Dh is equally adamant, and dcs fortunately know no other alternative. Sorry, op, that you are alsone in your house [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:17 AM Flag
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Your DH is the problem here. Monkey see monkey do. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:38 AM Flag
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Op. Exactly. Dh doesn’t care. I don’t think he had it in his house now that I think about it.. funny the things you don’t think to ask when you’re dating [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:57 AM Flag
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Keep doing it. Sorry your dh can't back you up. You're right. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:39 AM Flag
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THIS and have something that you talk about every night at dinner. We have to all go around and say something good that happened that day. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 02:04 AM Flag
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Keep it up.We just spent a weekend with a family with two teens and they refuse to ever make the kids put down their phones. They ignored my DD the whole weekend because they never look up from the phone. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 02:46 AM Flag
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We do it every night. I mean, some kids miss for practice or something, but whoever is home sits together and eats. No phones allowed. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 04:41 AM Flag
[ - ] Now that it's over, the one thing I wish I'd known about high school admissions is _________________________________ 31 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
NY Schools 03.19.19, 12:28 AM Flag
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there are no "secret gems" out there. you dont need to tour 25 schools. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:29 AM Flag
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so, which schools did you end up applying to? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:55 AM Flag
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It's impossible to tour 25 schools! That's the myth of this stupid "choice' system! RIDICULOUS@!!!!! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:52 AM Flag
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I toured 19. Not saying I should have, but I did. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 04:42 AM Flag
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You obviously don't work full time outside of the house like I do. Anyone with a schedule they are not in control of cannot do it. NOT POSSIBLE. Also, what is the point in touring 19 schools???? The whole thing is insane. As if you have a CHOICE. MYTH of CHOICE! It is a MATCH!! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 04:28 PM Flag
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I thought we found a secret gem in reparatory company in Times Square if you have a performing arts kid. We listed it 3rd and got into our 2nd choice. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 03:08 AM Flag
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You have a better chance if you focuse on what you want. SHS or audition-based schools. It's hard to do both well. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:30 AM Flag
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This is a good one. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:54 AM Flag
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I posted the opposite below. Options are crucial. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:08 AM Flag
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Really glad my kid did all 3 plus Catholic. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 04:42 AM Flag
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I also disagree. You could focus on one of them and still not make it. Choices are important. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 11:58 AM Flag
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Don’t kid yourself that there are exceptions to the rubric. Signed, why did we list Lab first? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:41 AM Flag
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Where did dc get in? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:47 AM Flag
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What do you mean? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:56 AM Flag
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I already knew this, but try to get dc into a 6th-12th when applying for middle school [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:02 AM Flag
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Apply broadly. SHS, non-SHS, audition, Catholic (if that's appealing), private (if you can afford it). [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:08 AM Flag
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I don't think you have to go this crazy. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:16 AM Flag
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BTDT. We applied to three of the above and only one option was acceptable. I was so glad we did it. And tons of dcs were shut out at our D2 ms last year. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 02:07 AM Flag
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so, study and prepare for ISEE, SHSAT, HSPT, and prepare specific audition material - then take 4 different exams and audition/call back as many as 9 times (which is what we did), while writing essays and interviewing for private? while in 8th grade? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:24 AM Flag
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You don't have to all of the above, but I would recommend three of the five. I don't know where you are getting your 9 callbacks figure. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 02:07 AM Flag
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It doesn't matter that much - not as much as diversity, gender and other things you cannot control. And in the long long run, it doesn't matter as much ad the welath and privilege your kid is born into or isn't. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:14 AM Flag
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it's just high school [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:40 AM Flag
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this [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 04:15 AM Flag
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I think we did everything we could and dd didn't get her first choice, but in the end that was OK. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:40 AM Flag
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The choices - outside of the specialized schools and a HANDFUL of screened schools - SUCK. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:51 AM Flag
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I agree with this [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:57 AM Flag
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And those handful of screened are either (1) very small i.e. 100 spots OR less - many from a priority area - think Millenium, ElRo, NEST/Clinton (continuing middle schoolers) so really talking 50 or less spots (think also WESS, Columbia Secondary). What does that leave you with? What "good" schools take from all districts/no priority, and have only high school? Beacon. Bard. I am hardpressed to think of more. I am sure someone will chime in a few more names. But that will be it and your odds are slim. So apply broadly - privates, catholics, specialized, audition/LaG. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 04:32 PM Flag
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Would anyone have tried for private starting in K if they could go back in time knowing what they know now? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 03:00 AM Flag
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It will cost you $500k for the certainty. Depends how meaningful that is to you. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:53 PM Flag
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No, but I would have bought my apartment in District 2. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 04:33 PM Flag
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You WILL ask yourself “where are all the decent non-specialized, non-performing arts schools” and the answer is that there are only a handful everything else is depressing [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 10:33 AM Flag
[ - ] Lag Drama parents: how did you prepare dc for the audition? 3 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
NY Schools 03.19.19, 12:24 AM Flag
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Performing arts camp and a few drama coach lessons [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 03:10 AM Flag
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My kid just picked 2 monologues and practiced a bunch. No coach or camp. Has been in school plays though. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 04:43 AM Flag
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a few sessions with an acting coach [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 05:11 AM Flag
[ - ] I had some difficulty scratching off an amazon gift card number. I can’t read it now. Anything I can do? 5 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:21 AM Flag
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oops [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:27 AM Flag
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it might be on the receipt the gift giver has [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:50 AM Flag
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I would never keep a receipt for that! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 04:44 AM Flag
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f your Amazon.com Gift Card claim code is scratched off or can't be clearly read, you can contact us with the 16 or 30 digit number on the back of the card. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:56 AM Flag
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Thanks [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:09 AM Flag
[ - ] Looking for off the beaten path ideas for ds (10) for summer camp. He'd be at home learning welding or feeding wolves or something. He likes building forts and buried treasures but I fear this is the last summer he'll be into these things. Any maker camps like this that are kinda strange and out there? Sleepaway or day (Weschester area). 12 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:19 AM Flag
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Check out Project Ember! It's in California, but an absolutely incredible camp. Think kids, power tools, nature, creativity and designing and building gigantic wood things. Yes, the kids actually do the creating and the constructing. It's amazing! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:26 AM Flag
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1850 per week??? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:37 AM Flag
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np: That's pretty much in line with other overnight camps we've looked at. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:57 AM Flag
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half blood? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:37 AM Flag
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The campers build forts at the camp on Governor’s Island. They use non-power tools, but tools nonetheless. Might be too far for OP, but could help someone in NYC. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:46 AM Flag
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I just saw this camp listed on a school auction and thought it looked cool: https://www.biddingforgood.com/auction/item/item.action?id=341828921 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:48 AM Flag
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NP: I had a friend (she's a mom now) who went to Buck's Rock back in the day and loved it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:13 AM Flag
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Beam [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:51 AM Flag
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The Wolf Conservation Center in South Salem has day camp: https://nywolf.org/events/summer-wolf-camp-for-kids Muscoot Farms in Somers has camps, too https://muscootfarm.org/summer-camps/ [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:58 AM Flag
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Beam Camp [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 02:46 AM Flag
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There's a camp in Vermont where the kids build their own camps and do the cooking. Blanking on the name. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 04:16 AM Flag
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Definitely Beam Camp. I know a few kids who went there and loved it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:19 PM Flag
[ - ] Seriously. So are these people on UES Mommas. I just saw a post for a woman who was finished with her bathroom Reno. She paid $27 for her tile and now wants to sell the extra for $20. No detail on exactly how much she has leftover! Also, she will sell you the one pint sample of Benjamin Moore paint she still has. 16 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:10 AM Flag
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The struggle is real. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:12 AM Flag
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This is not specific to ues. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:15 AM Flag
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2700? $27,000? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:16 AM Flag
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Your question is valid. $27 per sheet. Not sure what her sheets are sized. When we bought tile a few years a ago, a sheet of the small decorative tile was 10x10 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:20 AM Flag
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Okay. I'm missing the point of this post. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:19 AM Flag
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I could use extra $$ but would never do this. I'd be too embarrassed and have no time. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:20 AM Flag
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Same-o [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:26 AM Flag
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I’ve sold things on Facebook marketplace and the offers are so low. I sold my stokke high chair for $100 in less than 24 hours. Which I thought was a fair price and I got my asking price. My listing is less than an hour old and people are already haggling. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:35 AM Flag
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You should see park slope parents group, people literally sell things for like 3$. WHO HAS THE TIME FOR THAT?! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:49 AM Flag
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Lol this!! I’m poor and would not. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:50 AM Flag
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I’ve posted a light fixture for free because it is a hard to donate item and it works fine. I just didn’t want to throw it away or keep an item that was never going to be used again. Someone did claim it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:18 AM Flag
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I live in flyover - people sell the saddest stuff - like a bunch of old paperbacks for $5 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:03 AM Flag
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My DH is obsessed with doing this. He insists on selling everything on Craigslist. He has no time - I don't know how he does it - but he creates posts and takes photos. He really enjoys it and it will patiently keep posting until an item sells. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:04 AM Flag
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How are people not embarrassed ?? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:06 AM Flag
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So? What's really the issue? She shouldn't try to get some cost back? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:41 AM Flag
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No. It’s a few extra tiles. Ridiculous to try and sell [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 03:43 AM Flag
[ - ] Dd got into Columbia Secondary, her last choice. She had 95 average and high 4’s. How is this possible? Her friends who have 85 average got into better school. 29 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:04 AM Flag
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WHere do you live, which schools did you rank> Did she have more than 10 combined lateness/absences? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:05 AM Flag
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District 2. 0 absences. Elton, Baruch, beacon, lab, nest [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:06 AM Flag
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something isn't adding up. I'd contact your guidance counselor. I know people with similar scores/grades who got Baruch [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:09 AM Flag
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Would the guidance counselor be able to do anything? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:09 AM Flag
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I'm not sure. Perhaps you can appeal [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:11 AM Flag
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Beacon at least is not just about scores. If you make the screen (Basically 3s), then everyone is in the same pool and it's about the essay. I think Lab is also more "holistic." I thought NEST was pretty straight numbers, tho.. Dunno. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:55 AM Flag
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LOTS of kids frankly - far too many for NEST to admit - have 95 averages (or higher) and high - some perfect - 4s. Sorry. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:54 AM Flag
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Yes, Beacon wants “cool” kids. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 03:30 AM Flag
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tardies? I don't know about the D2 schools but NEST is pure numbers and I would think those are good enough. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:33 AM Flag
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Nope. Not good enough because lots of kids have them and higher. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:55 AM Flag
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How can this be? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 03:31 AM Flag
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And they would usually be good enough numbers for Baruch, ElRo, and Lab since they're in D2. Something is off. You should definitely talk to GC. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:59 AM Flag
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Does this process include anything other than test scores? Do you need recommendations from teachers and guidance counselors? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:11 AM Flag
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No [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:12 AM Flag
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isn't there an interview? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:14 AM Flag
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This is my point. There is something else they use other than just the raw test scores [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:22 AM Flag
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There isn’t [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:46 AM Flag
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NO [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:30 AM Flag
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There was last year. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:36 AM Flag
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They took that out but there was a portfolio. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 04:45 AM Flag
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Where did her friend get in? Did you rank that school? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:38 AM Flag
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How did she do on the state tests? If you look at the DOE high school book, this city is rife with underperforming schools and grade inflation. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:40 AM Flag
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There is no such thing as "high 4's". It's a simple 4, not 4+ or 4-, or 4.765. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:42 AM Flag
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You are incorrect it goes from 4.0-4.5 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:47 AM Flag
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4.5 is perfect [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 02:12 AM Flag
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Everyone knows a high 4 means 4.3 and up [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 02:41 AM Flag
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Wrong [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 03:03 AM Flag
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Your friends must be in a different zone [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 03:30 AM Flag
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CSS is supposed to be really good and the alliance with Columbia Univ is appealing. It's a small school and they take kids seriously. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 04:18 AM Flag
[ - ] If divorced and share custody, how often do you communicate with your ex, by email or otherwise? My ex finds reasons to email almost daily and it is so frustrating. 9 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:02 AM Flag
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At least it's not a phone call. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:20 AM Flag
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To me, that is the biggest benefit of beng alinve today instead of 40 years earlier. If I had to speak to my ex as often as we email I would shoot myself. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 04:46 AM Flag
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Half of UB crucifies divorced DHs for not being involved with their kids, the other half crucifies them for being too involved [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:24 AM Flag
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Np: let me offer you an example of the emails I get. ExDH happened to notice that dcs were wearing new shoes when he saw them last (my dcs outgrow/wear out shoes every 4 months, so this happens a lot but first time exDH seemed to notice) and he gave me a check for $50 “as a gift to help with their new shoes”. Wrote “Gift” in check’s subject line. I’ve gotten two emails since then threatening to cancel his check because I did not seem “appreciative”. (He owes me $5300 in court-ordered expenses, which I will will eventually seek when he owes enough to make it worth recovering in court). These daily emails are indeed frustrating but they do not demonstrate a dad being “too involved” with his kids. I just don’t respond to any of this, but if court it takes a small daily emotional toll. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:38 AM Flag
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^but of course [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:39 AM Flag
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OP: Omg YES!! I so relate. And that sounds so frustrating. My ex emails regularly and it in no way is to express involvement or desired involvement with kids. It's almost a connection point, as if to stay negatively attached. My ex won't call the kids for a week, then will want to speak to them daily. They are little, so don't want to talk on the phone. He send rambling emails. Basically his behavior as a parent is completely driven by whatever else is going on in his life. If he has a new shiny object, he forgets about us, which is kind of nice actually. When he's depressed and sad, he smothers the kids and they sense it and want no part. He's also a scheduling nightmare so regularly emails to change dates, confirm dates, correct his own mistakes etc. I am glad I'm not alone. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:59 AM Flag
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Yikes. He sounds like a tool. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:20 AM Flag
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oh he is. sex addict, compulsive cheater with a little side of bipolar and narcissism thrown in. A cocktail of fun! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:28 AM Flag
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Enjoy your perspective from your high horse. None of us expected or planned to land in this spot. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:00 AM Flag
[ - ] Olivia Jade looks like she has fillers in her cheeks. Doesn’t resemble anyone in the family. Wdyt? 16 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 03.18.19, 11:57 PM Flag
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Interesting- I totally see aunt Becky in her features. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:01 AM Flag
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+1 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:29 AM Flag
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She has her mother’s head shape nose and mouth. She has the vacant hollowed out look of her father’s eyes. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:00 AM Flag
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Sister looks more like Lori [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:08 AM Flag
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Of course she has fillers. Her face is fake. Gross. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:12 AM Flag
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She has something in her face [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:12 AM Flag
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Yep, weird overly round face. In a very young person it makes you look like you haven’t lost your adolescent “puppy fat”. Not cute. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:40 AM Flag
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She’s looks mostly normal. If you want to see what happens to a young girl with too much work done, check out Brielle Bierman. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:37 AM Flag
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I don't understand the huge lips. They are so fake and unattractive. The other woman on that show looks like a clown. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:50 AM Flag
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Yup. It's like they don't have access to mirrors. I'm sure they get a ton of attention not realizing it's because their lips are god awful and yuuge. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:21 AM Flag
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I feel bad for her. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 12:43 AM Flag
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Are you joking? I can hardly tell her apart from her mother. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:08 AM Flag
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Look a photos from a few years ago. Different face. Def. fillers. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:26 AM Flag
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+1 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:30 AM Flag
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I think she looks like her dad through the eyes, actually. She also looks shrink-wrapped skinny to me. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 01:08 AM Flag
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Her mom had the same round face and cheeks when she was young. And there were no fillers in the 80s. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.19.19, 03:32 AM Flag
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