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[ - ] Anyone try multi focal lenses or one long and one short sight lens to rose care of distance and reading. What is your experi cell? Thx 14 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 03:06 PM Flag
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multi focal are great [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 03:08 PM Flag
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Op: I have -4.00 and + 1.5. No astigmatism. Did u also try the combo of one eye distance and one for resting contacts? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 04:07 PM Flag
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^^ reading [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 04:07 PM Flag
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I started wearing multifocal lenses and overall I'm happy. The only drawback is that now my far vision is not as sharp and clear as before (I have astigmatism and these don't correct it as well) and the lenses work best in brighter light, so in the evening or at night I don't see as well. But it's wonderful not having to reach for my readers every time I want to see something up close. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 03:16 PM Flag
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Op: so u wear multi focal contacts but need readers at night? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 04:07 PM Flag
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I wear multi-focal contacts and don't need to use readers when I have them in. At night I either deal with the fact that I can't see far away as clearly, but as long as they're in I can always see up close better and don't need readers. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 04:10 PM Flag
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Op: Can u drive at night w multi? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 04:24 PM Flag
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Yes - I have multifocal lenses - No problems. Though I seem to prefer to read with my glasses off and hold whatever I am reading very close. I also have contact lenses - one eye adjusted for distance and one for close up. No problems with those either. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 03:45 PM Flag
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Op: I meant multi focal contacts. Do u mean u have contacts and still need reading glasses? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 04:06 PM Flag
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im trying multifocal lenses now.trial run. not loving it. only been a couple of days [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 04:49 PM Flag
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Op: what is the issue? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 05:10 PM Flag
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cant get used to them. impossible to explain. you have to go to the eye dr/optomotrist and they will let you try a pair for a few days, if it doesnt work, you try a different type. Zero way to know what will work by asking others opinions. i tried another type before that worked better for me, so i may tryit again. there are various types of multifocals. google it. the dr can advise based on how ofetn u wear them, your particular eye issues. its different for everyone. if u need bifocals, in general, bifocal glasses work better than the contacts, but you should have the option [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 06:31 PM Flag
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and with how often i look at my phone, im not wearing regular distance contacts and then putting reader glasses on 75 times a day... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 06:32 PM Flag
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I used to ask this question a lot, but i just had to try them to understand. Multis are not great [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 06:38 PM Flag
[ - ] I've noticed recently Trump's press secretary is being referred to as "Sarah Sanders" instead of "Sarah Huckabee Sanders," which is the name she appeared to use when she started the job. 6 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 03:05 PM Flag
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OP: Perhaps the Trump people complained that tiger use of her maiden name made her seem too "liberal"? Same as when HRC dropped "Rodham to be known as "Hillary Clinton." [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 03:06 PM Flag
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OP: By "liberal," I mean" Not a traditional WIFE. How dare a woman not fully take her husband's name! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 03:08 PM Flag
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bet it's this [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 03:11 PM Flag
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Probably trying to sound less hick [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 03:07 PM Flag
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OP: Makes her sound even more like a "hick." [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 03:09 PM Flag
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At first they wanted to emphasize that she is Huckabee’s child. Now resuming her traditional name. Happens commonly with famous women who marry and change name — any running moms remember Suzy Favor? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 03:25 PM Flag
[ - ] Anyone had laser hair removal done? 15 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 03:00 PM Flag
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I have. No regrets. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 03:04 PM Flag
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Op I did my bikini yesterday, they told me to shave first. Now I have a gross stable, normal? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 03:06 PM Flag
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hmmmm. The person who did mine actually told me not to shave right before getting a treatment. I don't remember having stubble. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 03:09 PM Flag
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So if you didn’t shave, did you hair fall out after the treatment? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 03:26 PM Flag
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Where did you have it done? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 03:31 PM Flag
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NP. I can't keep it straight -- to shave or not shave right before. My skin was irritated after and they said to use cortaid (which I did which helped). No hot shower right after either (next day is fine). [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 03:17 PM Flag
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np My place says to shave one day before. They want to see where growth will come in but not fry the actual hair that is protruding from skin. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 03:26 PM Flag
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So do you have a stubble the next day? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 03:41 PM Flag
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No, but they recommend more exfoliating in the folowing days, and the hairs that were zapped fall out as the follicles die. I haven’t noticed personally, but I haven’t done pubic hair. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 03:44 PM Flag
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So it doesn’t fall out right away? When does the follicle die? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 03:47 PM Flag
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I didn’t notice that much, to be honest. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 04:18 PM Flag
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yes. one brand of laser was good and one left little circles and hurt like hell. i think cynosure was the good one but do a test area. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 03:04 PM Flag
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Yes, no regrets [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 03:45 PM Flag
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Where did you have it done? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 03:59 PM Flag
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Op I just called them, they said the follicle should die in the next 2-3 weeks and the hair should fall out... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 03:53 PM Flag
[ - ] What does 5th grade math at Kumon cover? Does Kumon follow common core standards? 3 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 03:00 PM Flag
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Fractions. Mixed, +/-/x/'/,. Focuses on speed of accurate calculations. It does not focus on the extensive word problem format of the state math tests. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 03:09 PM Flag
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And you don't jump in at 5th grade level unless your skills are up to it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 03:11 PM Flag
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Kumon does an assessment and will start the child at a level they have already mastered before moving up. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 04:05 PM Flag
[ - ] My DD, 5, who seems more like an 8 year old, hates animated typical kid movies, even animated. She has watched and loved Mathilda, Annie, Maleficent, Cinderella, the modern version. Beauty & the Beast modern she is too scared of, so we'll wait on that. Any other ideas ? What about Ella Enchanted or the Princess Diaries, or any movies with kid girl heroines, who have adventures...would love any suggestions ! 9 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:55 PM Flag
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Love Ella Enchanted. How about The Little Princess or Shirley Temple movies? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:57 PM Flag
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thank you, yes i think she'd like shirley temple ! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 03:10 PM Flag
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My 5yo dd loves Ella Enchanted, also Enchanted, Princess Diaries (first only), The BFG, is obsessed with the British Baking Show and Julie’s Greenroom on Netflix. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 03:04 PM Flag
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Also first 2 Harry Potter books and movies but we haven’t gone beyond those. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 03:05 PM Flag
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thank you ! OP - if your DD likes BBS, also try Master Chef Junior, all on Netflix, my DD loves these too ...and the cupcake contest show, I forget the name of it ... I just found Julies greenroom, that looks good too...thx! & Mary Poplins ... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 03:12 PM Flag
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Frog princess [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 03:08 PM Flag
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good one ! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 03:12 PM Flag
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The Apple Dumpling Gang [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 03:49 PM Flag
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Sound of Music [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 06:57 PM Flag
[ - ] if you can ice skate, can you just put on roller skates and go? or is there a learning curve? 13 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:53 PM Flag
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Yes, you can put on roller skates or rollerblades and just to it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:54 PM Flag
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It's a lot easier to roller skate than to ice skate. You're good! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:55 PM Flag
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Thanks. Just looking not to fall on my ass, you know. In front of kids.. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:58 PM Flag
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I respectfully disagree. I’m a decent ice skater but a mess on roller skates. Wheels are harder to control than blades. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 03:05 PM Flag
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same here, but you will pick it up quickly [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 03:06 PM Flag
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I disagree with your disagreement. ;) I can roller skate like a pro, but I am shite on ice skates. Ice skates require a lot of balance and ankle strength. I SUCK! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 03:06 PM Flag
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Fascinating! Give a full disclaimer to your kids (you've never done it before) wear an outfit that you feel good in but covers any problem areas (including butt crack) and take it in stride. Fall and get up again! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 04:13 PM Flag
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Yes, I think you'll be great at it! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 04:11 PM Flag
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Very different motions. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 03:26 PM Flag
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yes but same general idea - stopping is the biggest difference, I grew up ice skating - dragging a foot to stop was not natural for me [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 04:08 PM Flag
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I used to roller skate all the time when I was a kid--back in the days when roller skates had metal wheels. I don't even remember how we stopped! There were no brakes on those things back then. It was a great advancement when skates had rubber wheels and a stopper at the front. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 04:13 PM Flag
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Did you have the adjustable size ones that strap onto your shoes? I just saw a pair at an antique store and it brought me back to 1973. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 04:21 PM Flag
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I never had those (at least I don't remember those). I had boots with metal wheels (late 1960s/early 1970s). I spent hours and hours and hours skating. My brother used to pull me behind his bike. I'd hop curbs and do all kinds of fancy moves--with no brakes! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 04:28 PM Flag
[ - ] How would you handle this? DCs are in a very good public but people are really mixed income (it’s a magnet school that accepts kids of all backgrounds who do really well, regardless of zoning). So we have some kids whose parents work for McDonalds and some whose parents are super wealthy. I have had some really bad experiences with a mom who keeps rubbing all her luxury spending into the faces of low income kids and parents. I do not want to be like this. When we go on a cool trip over spring break, how can I instruct my 9 year old not to talk about it? Just lie when someone asks her what she did? 22 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:51 PM Flag
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You win for Most Obvious VBA [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:52 PM Flag
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It’s not VBA. This is about trips that would be UB middle class, not a safari in Kenya or beach trip to Bora Bora. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:54 PM Flag
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So, do you think that the kid from the housing project who had to watch her little brother and sister during vacation week while her parents worked is really going to ask your nine-year-old what she did over vacation? I think at that age kids are well enough aware that others have a different home situation than their own. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:55 PM Flag
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After summer the teacher always makes them do a project about their summer. DC puts photos from trips and tells where we went. Teacher sometimes asks the class after spring break. And no, I am not making this up. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:59 PM Flag
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Ours too. Hate when they do this. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 03:06 PM Flag
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Do you honestly think a nine-year-old is not aware that some of her classmates have a different socioeconomic background and lifestyle than she does? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:53 PM Flag
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I am trying to teach DC not to brag... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:57 PM Flag
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You cant. I dont know what to do myself. Have friends who go skiing in New Zealand. Have others who watch dollars to pay ConEd. I cant go skiing in NZ, but dont even know what Con Ed costs. I actually think it's the sign of the utmost grace - to be able to navigate this stuff. As far as kids - I try explaining how lucky we are, etc etc, but it doesn't always work.. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:55 PM Flag
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OP. I agree with this. Utmost grace - I am trying to learn this as well and certainly don’t want DC to come across as a braggart. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:56 PM Flag
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Yeah. I am no longer speaking to my formerly closest friend over this. She married major money and discovered a life I didnt know existed. We couldnt get past it - we just live in different realities. However my mom's closest friend was from high school - the friend struggled to put food on the table. But we went on trips with them - my mom just chose things everyone could do. And she never ever paid for them. It was just somehow handled so well, I dont know even how it was possible.. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 03:02 PM Flag
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That's great! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 03:07 PM Flag
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Your mom sounds nice! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 03:25 PM Flag
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Model sensitivity and remind her that not everyone has what she has. I remember at one point at my dd's school girls were bringing their American Girl dolls to school and I told mine that there were kids at her school who didn't have enough to eat, much less have an expensive doll so it would be rude to show it off at school. She was shocked. It never occurred to her that that was the case and she completely understood. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:56 PM Flag
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^^this. Also your child does not have to lie or hide certain things. A quick "We went to florida", etc. Is sufficient. No need to go into detail unless asked. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 03:05 PM Flag
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Kids can talk about their experiences as long as they are not being dicks about it. Talk about what they learned, etc. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 03:01 PM Flag
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Btw, don’t turn your kid into a liar. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 03:03 PM Flag
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Why would you ask a nine year old to lie? I'm not relating to this post, and my kids grew up in the Tarrytown schools, where there were some low income kids and some families that were well-off. I think you need to live your life the way you live it,. Kids realize that some people have more money than others and that's life. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 03:07 PM Flag
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I think it's pretty easy to teach not to flaunt things, whether it's wealth or fancy trips or things that people of any income might have (a loving intact family, good looks, special talents). [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 03:08 PM Flag
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Is this Hunter by any chance?? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 03:13 PM Flag
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You need to remind her of how privileged she is, and how some people can't do what she can do so to brag about it might make others have their feeling hurt. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 03:27 PM Flag
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Kids don’t talk about “what are you doing this weekend.” They are in the moment. I’m often amazed at things my DD doesn’t know about her friends, because it’s stuff you would ask an adult the first ten minutes of getting to know him or her. So don’t worry about it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 03:28 PM Flag
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I always tell my kids it's not polite to brag, or show off trips or things, that it's poor manners. I think just constant talking about it helps. esp. anytime they go on a trip or get something nice. We are not wealthy by any means, it's just my Episopal upbringing. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 03:49 PM Flag
[ - ] How many hours a week of household help do you think I need to have a clean apartment, dinner cooked and all laundry done. Apartment is 1400sq ft. Laundry includes 3 kids, and bedding for 4 beds. TYIA 6 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:50 PM Flag
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So 1x a week cleaning + laundry takes 10 hours. I am thinking another day of light cleaning and laundry is a other 5 hours and then dinner is 5 hours so total of 20 hours a week [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:59 PM Flag
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Ten hours is a lot for what you describe, unless you are channel surfing while the laundry is in process. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 03:29 PM Flag
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^^Do you anticipate her making all the dinners one day and you just reheat? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 03:45 PM Flag
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?? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 05:18 PM Flag
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Wondering if it has ti be the same hours every day. If she’s there for two hours every day and starts a load of wash as soon as she arrives, she could do one day’s laundry and dinner and light tidying each day. Then maybe four hours one other day for the weekly big clean? So 14 hours total. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 05:39 PM Flag
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3 hours a day [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 03:09 PM Flag
[ - ] We're in Arizona for the week and it's 36 degrees here. 52 degrees back home in New York. Great 5 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:46 PM Flag
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I had that happen when I was in FL a few weeks ago, frustrating. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:47 PM Flag
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Ugh! Same thing happened to me the one time I went to Az! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 03:26 PM Flag
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But it’s a dry cold [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 03:51 PM Flag
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Last time I went to Arizona it was 105 degrees at midnight. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 03:53 PM Flag
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Spa day [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 05:20 PM Flag
[ - ] Holy crap. Those high-top Golden Goose shoes cost nearly $500. These are a status symbol, somehow? Are they super comfortable? 9 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:46 PM Flag
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no not comfortable [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:47 PM Flag
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They’re hideous. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:47 PM Flag
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They are ugly and almost every girl at DD private wears them. 14 YO with $500 sneakers. Shameful. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:50 PM Flag
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ew [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 03:07 PM Flag
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I dont see them at our private. all the girls war stan smiths. reasonably priced phew! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 03:07 PM Flag
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I love Stan Smiths [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 03:09 PM Flag
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So tacky, I can't stand when teens have super expensive shoes, bags, etc. Such a bad message [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 03:51 PM Flag
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I want a pair for myself, but the price tag is such a turn-off. I do think they are a little "sleeker" compared to something like Converse. I also like the pre-distressing (which is dopey, I know). [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 03:44 PM Flag
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New to the world? Some shoes cost a lot more than that. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 04:43 PM Flag
[ - ] Riddle me this. You are an adult with a dirty plate from your own breakfast. There is an empty dishwasher. Why do you put the dish in the sink? 27 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:42 PM Flag
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If you ever get the answer, please text it to my husband and teenagers. Thank you. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:43 PM Flag
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I'm at work today and they are all home. I fully expected it when I get home at 7 p.m. there will be a sink full of dirty dishes that no one gave a second thought to. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:43 PM Flag
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Put one of them in charge of loading and running the dishwasher. Rotate who is in charge each time. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:46 PM Flag
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Mine too. Exact same thought process [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:50 PM Flag
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The woman will take care of it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:43 PM Flag
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Because I know you will. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:44 PM Flag
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I actually prefer this. I hate when DH starts nosing around in the dishwasher and rearranging stuff. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:44 PM Flag
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Dad? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:51 PM Flag
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Don't know. At least it's making its way to the sink in your case. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:45 PM Flag
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I’m home sick today. Dishwasher is full of clean items. Do I empty and refill with my geeky ones or leave for dh to empty tonight? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:46 PM Flag
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^germy not geeky. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:48 PM Flag
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You can't be serious [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:51 PM Flag
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Are you really asking this? Wash your hands keep your mouth closed and unload the dishwasher. For fucksake I cannot believe the idiots on this board. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:50 PM Flag
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Because he's never been required to, so why should he? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:48 PM Flag
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Because I want to take my shower and do other things before messing with the dishes. Maybe I want to have another cup of coffee and want to put it all in the machine together. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:50 PM Flag
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Op: these are my in laws. All of them. They seem to think the dishwasher is an objet d’art. They do this at their own house to. Kitchen is filled with dirty dishes constantly. DH has changed his ways but the rest are animals. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:52 PM Flag
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or, they are different than you. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 03:19 PM Flag
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np: I sent my parents articles about how you shouldn't fully wash all dishes before placing them in dishwasher. Opposite of your ILs. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 04:03 PM Flag
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Old people don't change. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 04:45 PM Flag
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My DH will take his cup/plate to sink then run water for at least three minutes, getting water everywhere and then leave plates in sink and counters soaking wet. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:52 PM Flag
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I would be really annoyed if anyone stuck dirty dishes directly into my dishwasher. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 03:08 PM Flag
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Same! I thought I was the only one! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 03:29 PM Flag
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Me three! I don't even let DH load the DW b/c even if he rinses, he doesn't rinse well enough. I know that I've created a terrible situation. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 03:45 PM Flag
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PP As long as he handles enough so it feels even it works for us. I don’t understand couples who share chores. DH does the vacuuming —all the vacuuming, every time. I don’t even think about it. I wouldn’t want to be, all, Who’s turn is it to vacuum? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 03:51 PM Flag
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So you rinse and put it in the dishwasher. Why leave it in the sink. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 04:22 PM Flag
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Because my wife and I have very discrete chores, and loading and unloading the dishwasher is hers. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 03:30 PM Flag
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Because the housekeeper will take care of it? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 04:44 PM Flag
[ - ] Any idea how long it will take to drive from Park Slope to Rye, NY tonight (arriving at 7)? Lots of traffic? Train would be 1hr40min door to door, trying to figure out if driving is quicker. 6 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:39 PM Flag
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Google maps has a feature that accounts for time of day traffic in travel planning [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:45 PM Flag
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this. you can specify the exact time you are leaving [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:48 PM Flag
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1:25 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:48 PM Flag
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I take care of my grandson in Park Slope and drive to Tarrytown at the same time of night. (I think it's a similar trip). It varies. Sometimes I leave at 5:00 and am home by 6:15, other times I get home at 7:30. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 03:15 PM Flag
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^^Some of my worst experiences have been because I used Waze. One night it was pouring rain and Waze had me driving through local streets in the Bronx. After that, I said, "Never again." [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 03:18 PM Flag
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Thanks! Yeah google is giving be a one hr range, saying it’ll take btw 1:10 and 2:10. Think I’ll be taking the train to be safe :) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 05:04 PM Flag
[ - ] My friend wants to invest in a building in PA in a great neighborhood that takes in around 4000 rental income per month but the asking price is a bit over 500k. She wants to pay cash, does this sound like a good investment? 19 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:34 PM Flag
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do the math. If she keeps it rented 100% of the time, she will earn the 500K back more or less in 5 years. Then add appreciation - which will be significant if it is indeed a great neighborhood. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:38 PM Flag
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Broker: how does 4K times 12 (which is $48K in my world) pay off $500K in 5 years??? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:43 PM Flag
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Come on, few properties have a 20% cap rate with or without property taxes taken out [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:51 PM Flag
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I don't know why you would ever pay cash, then you have no tax deduction for mortgage. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:42 PM Flag
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Lots of apartments are sold for cash in NYC. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:43 PM Flag
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We're not talking about an apartment in New York City, reading comprehension? We're talking about an investment property that would be rented. Try to follow along. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:44 PM Flag
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Ok slow one...I was responding to the OR, who implied (if you are capable of implications) that one should never pay cash for real estate. Well, many do, including wealthy and intelligent people in NYC. Try to keep up, jerk. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:47 PM Flag
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I am not responder and my question was directed to the original post. Why would you pay cash for a property which is for rental income. Again, try to keep up. I'm well aware that people do pay cash for their primary residence or their own vacation homes or whatever. But as far as an investment property on which one hopes to turn for a profit at some point why would you do this? Why would you take out a half a million dollars in cash and be without that cash for the next 5 to 10 years when you could put down the required down payment and mortgage the rest of it and use the rental income to pay the mortgage as well as claim the tax deduction. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:51 PM Flag
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Jerk-a-rama. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 03:03 PM Flag
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Oh, yeah, there are not investment properties that are rented in NYC. Let's consider the unique situation of PA. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 03:03 PM Flag
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np- ny is different. some building require you pay all cash. the majority are not paid in cash. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:45 PM Flag
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Often over 50% of NYC condos are paid all cash. Are condos more likely to have this requirement? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:51 PM Flag
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obviously not, yes condos are sometimes purchased in cash because it's Russian and Chinese money used for investments. There are no requirements to get into condos. They could never get through a coop board. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 03:21 PM Flag
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^but the majority of Americans carry a mortgage [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 03:21 PM Flag
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This post is about a property in Pennsylvania. Does not matter what people in New York do with their apartment that they're going to live in. This is a rental property in another state. Seems counterintuitive to lose all that capital for some period of time when you don't have to. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:51 PM Flag
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Yes, it would be a completely different analysis if it were a rental property in NY. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 03:02 PM Flag
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Because you have to pay more interest to the bank than you get back from the tax deduction. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 03:31 PM Flag
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There is surely a spreadsheet online for this. She will need to factor in maintenance, insurance, taxes, etc... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:43 PM Flag
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And also her investment alternatives. EG would she make more money in stocks [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:44 PM Flag
[ - ] I think my mom pities me because I work. Brought my DCs to my parents' house overnight (since they're off from school and I was off yesterday) and my mom continuously asks me what so-and-so's DH does for a living and she also makes comments about towns where friends I grew up with moved to. If that's not annoying enough, she also probes about what their DHs do and then tells me that she never needed to work. Sure, she and my dad go to Olive Garden for dinner and can't afford to go on any nice trips, but that's her choice. I don't defend mine but am sure glad to have better saving habits for the long-term than my parents did. 31 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:33 PM Flag
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She meant well but you are just behaving like a ... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:36 PM Flag
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? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:36 PM Flag
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Hey, if your mom constantly made remarks about the fact that you have a career and work-full time, and you just smiled and didn't feel need to explain to her... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:37 PM Flag
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Zzzzzzzzzz [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:37 PM Flag
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She might be pitying herself too if you lean on her for childcare to support your job and she feels she did her own childcare back in the day. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:39 PM Flag
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I stayed with my kids at my parents' place. I was the one taking care of my kids! They are not happy, by the way. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:42 PM Flag
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No, we have childcare. My parents are never asked to babysit. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:45 PM Flag
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Do you feel better about yourself now for having belittled your parents who apparently have a happt marriage and take care of your kids overnight for free? Who apparently made it possible for you to have this so fucking awesome career that is so very impressive and important? Their finances are none of your business and for all you know they could have millions stuck under the mattress. I hope they leave you diddly squat. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:39 PM Flag
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Lol... this...agree [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:41 PM Flag
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You sound like an awful person creating her own narrative for OP. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:43 PM Flag
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Who said parents were happy? and who said OP left kids there? And who is claiming OP has an awesome career? Dumbass. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:44 PM Flag
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And the op sounds like a smug ungrateful bitch. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:46 PM Flag
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Why? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 04:47 PM Flag
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Wow, there's a very angry person on this morning. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:43 PM Flag
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Belittled? And who said I left my kids at their place? I stayed there since I was off. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:44 PM Flag
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You suck. Way to write your own story/project from your own experience. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:48 PM Flag
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+1 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 04:46 PM Flag
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Good points [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 04:46 PM Flag
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It is irritating but they are products of their time. Smile and nod or limit the time you are around her. Other option is to tell her that it bothers you, that actually worked with my mom. She wasn't aware of how it bothered me and has made an effort to stop. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:41 PM Flag
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My mom gets offended if you tell her something she says bothers you :/ [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:43 PM Flag
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Well mine did too, at first but then we spoke more about it and she got it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:45 PM Flag
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Thus. OP, when your parents were married, it was pretty easy for a man to support his family on a single income and a blue collar job. People have job security, predictable raises for merit and for cost of living, pension plans, and it was not a problem for a couple to have two three or four children and everybody to have all their needs met with a little bit left over for some fun extras. It's very confusing for people that generation to understand how much more we have to do with far less money in today's world. You apparently have parents who have a nice enough home, can afford to go to dinner even if it is olive garden God forbid, and take your children overnight and during school vacations at no cost to you. So if your mom's comments come across as hurtful, be honest with her and let her know. She probably doesn't see it that way and will stop once she knows is bothering you. For what it's worth, my mother felt awful that I had to work. And I didn't have an important career or an ego about it, I had to work in order to pay the bills. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:49 PM Flag
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exactly this, OP [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:51 PM Flag
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My mom is similarly critical. It’s a defense mechanism. You know that by now! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:46 PM Flag
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But I never attacked her! She just constantly tells me I shouldn't work so much (I don't! Just a typical full-time job). [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:47 PM Flag
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In my mom’s case, she regrets giving up her career. So she belittle mine. What can you do. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:53 PM Flag
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Tune her out or fade [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 04:47 PM Flag
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let it go. i only work part-time, mostly SAH to a 6 yr old who is in school most of the year. Everyone in my circle/family thinks i'm weird. But I get to see DC every day at 2:30pm, thru every school break, etc. I work enough to make extra cash. Forget peoples expectations. In NYC, you are the norm! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:52 PM Flag
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How old is your mother??? If she's in her 60s, many women DID work in her generation. My mother is in her 80s and most of her friends did not. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 03:31 PM Flag
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If you need free childcare, then suck it up. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 04:48 PM Flag
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Where did I mention free childcare? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 06:12 PM Flag
[ - ] If you want a guy who is a traditional provider (and you don't work), how much submission do you think you would need to show? Not talking about sexually, talking about deferring to him, letting him lead and be the key decision maker for the family etc. 32 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:18 PM Flag
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Dh wants me to be involved and an equal partner in all financial decisions and I do 90% of all kids/family stuff. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:20 PM Flag
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Same. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:20 PM Flag
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Same here. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 03:31 PM Flag
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Same [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 03:56 PM Flag
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This. I do the bigger picture financial stuff too. Retirement & investment decisions. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 04:12 PM Flag
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What type of decisions? I don't feel either one of us is the key decision maker. We discuss most decisions ad nauseum. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:20 PM Flag
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I'm arguing with a guy on another forum who was raised very traditionally. His father was kind of a benevolent dictator, very decisive, led the family but he said both parents were very happy with that setup, and that his dad always took his mother's best interests into consideration. but there was no question that he called the shots. It sounds to me like she had little agency to determine her own life and that he did her thinking for her. But the guy is saying this is what women have always wanted pre-feminism -- a dominant man. It's totally foreign to me, so I'm curious to know if this resonates with anyone here who might be more traditional/religious than I am. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:29 PM Flag
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Certain cultures are more into the dominant man thing and in many cases, the man was more educated that the woman so then it seemed to "make sense" for him to make the important decisions. Not really that way anymore. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:37 PM Flag
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yeah I wonder about that. This guy says his mother is southern and dad is midwestern, but i had thought they were latino or something. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:41 PM Flag
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its a cringy scenario, but some women are raised that way. i dont see how you could respect yourself if you your husband essentially treats you as a child. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 03:02 PM Flag
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No, in many cultures that seem on the outside as traditional, the women are calling the shots. My mil is Asian and she makes the decisions, my two bffs are Latina and they make the decisions. the husbands count on them to research and decide things. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 04:17 PM Flag
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I don't know if it's necessarily religion based, some women just want to be Sah lifers. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 06:43 PM Flag
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I think it depends on the main but he will probably have the final say the majority of the time. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:28 PM Flag
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why? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:40 PM Flag
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Basically, he wants to make all decisions, but asks for my opinion sometimes. Bottom line, in all honesty, I agree with most of the things he decides. When I don’t agree, it usually doesn’t matter much anyway. For instance, we disagreed on what home security company to use. I really didn’t care but I wouldn’t have gone the route he did. But, whatever. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:28 PM Flag
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don't you ever feel humiliated by his dominance? i mean, i wouldn't care about the home security system either, but what about for stuff that does matter, like paying for the kids' college educations or the decision to move the family for work reasons? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:40 PM Flag
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No, I’m not humiliated. Why would I be? Like I said, stuff that does matter, we agree on. And of course we are paying to educate our kids. And we are not moving anytime soon. He has his own business. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 03:54 PM Flag
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I work in a mostly male workplace, and one guy just revels in their “roles” and the fact that she does all the house/child related tasks and he just comes and goes and does as he pleases. Nice guy otherwise, but I cringe when he speaks like that. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:29 PM Flag
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It's possible that she's equally happy not having to work and that they both love the strict division of labor. It would be very sad indeed if she is not happy with the arrangement! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:36 PM Flag
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how is this guy toward his female colleagues? do you find he belittles women's intelligence or subtly needs to dominate? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:37 PM Flag
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Pp: He is actually quite respectful in the workplace, but this is a second marriage for him and I think he was scarred by it and his behavior is a little reactionary. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:43 PM Flag
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IME, men who are traditional providers tend to be secure in themselves and happier when their wives make all the decisions. I grew up in that kind of household, where dad worked and then turned over his entire paycheck to mom. At work, he was the boss. At home, he did whatever mom told him to do. And I know men like that my age too. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:34 PM Flag
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This is my DH and my DH's parents. He liked how his Dad turned over the paycheck to his mother and he does the same. On the other hand, it made my own father upset to see his father handing over the paycheck so he gave my mom an allowance but handled the money and investments by himself. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:41 PM Flag
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This is the stuff of fundamentalism, no matter what the religion. And, your friend is wrong that women preferred this pre-feminism. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:37 PM Flag
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op. he's definitely not my friend! just some dude i'm talking to online. I guess he saw a traditional marriage that worked, and assumed it worked because of traditional roles, not in spite of them. Or maybe for a minority they do work. DH's' parents had this setup and his mom was deeply unhappy. She was way too 'traditional' to ever complain, but all the kids saw it. Her husband never took her happiness into consideration. The online dude would say the guy in that case was 'doing it wrong.' But I would think that's the problem with marriages where the woman's happiness depends 100 percent on her husband.... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:44 PM Flag
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It depends on whether the guy is an asshole who sings that material earnings entitle him to treat his family like shit. My husband and I agreed that it was important from me to stay home with the kids. It didn't mean that I gave up all autonomy and decision-making power however. Why would it? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:42 PM Flag
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How can you generalize like this? My DH is the provider for my family and we make all big decisions together. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:46 PM Flag
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i would still expect 50/50. That's how we do it, and Imm basically SAH, work part time. Your earnings mean zero in a marriage. Its a partnership. You take care of the home/kids, or whatever responsibilities you can if your partner is a bigger /the only earner. My Dh and I compromise. Nobody is "in charge". I will admit that I have veto power when it comes to decisions regarding kids (ie, cant go out unless fever gone for 24 hrs, not allowed to do XYZ, etc). [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:57 PM Flag
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i think that most men like to have their wife SAH because it makes their life easier. Nobody likes to come home from work and load the dishwasher, cook dinner, take off from work when a child is ill. I dont think its about "traditional roles". If one parent is making more money, and thats usually (not always, of course) the man, its nice to have a partner take care of everything else. If the main earner cant earn enoughto support the family, its just not an option [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 03:00 PM Flag
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+1 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 03:18 PM Flag
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I think that the rare men that feel that they should be the "leader" of the family have control issues and do not respect women. Why else would he not value his partner's judgement? Awful [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 06:37 PM Flag
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A lot. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 06:39 PM Flag
[ - ] If you have a wl success story, please share as much as you feel comfortable. How did you communicate with school, when did you find out? Thanks very much 4 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
NY Schools 02.20.18, 02:15 PM Flag
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Is there really anything you can do aside from reaching out occasionally and having PSD do the same? Where are you on the WL? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:30 PM Flag
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We don't know yet. For hs, btw [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:53 PM Flag
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Can school counselor find out where you are on the list? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 05:06 PM Flag
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I will see if they can. thanks [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 05:59 PM Flag
[ - ] After dealing with a ling illness, it looks like dd may need to repeat junior year at another school. Tell me this can work. 11 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:11 PM Flag
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long [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:12 PM Flag
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It is fine. In the long run, the most important thing is that she get an education. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:15 PM Flag
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Sure, why not! Especially at a new school. Fresh start. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:16 PM Flag
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We came very close to that, it all works out. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:18 PM Flag
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+1, it all works out. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:30 PM Flag
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I am glad she is better. Must have been scary for you. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:38 PM Flag
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The older I get, the more I realize that the school years don't really matter, in that, if she needs to repeat, that is absolutely fine, and will not affect her. She had good cause to repeat the year. I have had so many friends switch even careers (from lawyer to doctor and vice versa) down the line, and they had to start again from scratch so in the long run, you will not notice this repeated year at all. The fact that she will be at another school may even be better as she will be with new friends and can start afresh. Best of luck to you and your DD. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:40 PM Flag
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of course it will. be grateful she's doing well, and be excited for her to start fresh. Everybody loves the new kid. Its a great way to reinvent yourself [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 03:03 PM Flag
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It will be fine. My DS repeated 9th. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 04:03 PM Flag
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The school was not supportive? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 04:03 PM Flag
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It will work out [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 04:49 PM Flag
[ - ] What type of ensemble would you wear to your SS Private Girls school's Meet The Parents and the Board , Cocktail Party ? 20 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:03 PM Flag
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Assless chaps [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:06 PM Flag
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All chaps are assless, people! Otherwise they would just be pants. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 03:11 PM Flag
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+1 Duh [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 04:49 PM Flag
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You wear a cocktail dress to a cocktail party. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:08 PM Flag
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must be black ? knee length ? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:09 PM Flag
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You’re overthinking. Not too short, not low-cut, any color fine (seasonally appropriate), err on the side of more conservative but not stuffy. No Chanel. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:16 PM Flag
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A “The Future is Female” t-shirt with ripped jeans and skips [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:08 PM Flag
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What are skips? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:16 PM Flag
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Whatever outfit you find easiest to write a check in [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:11 PM Flag
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LOL [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:45 PM Flag
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Dolman sleeves [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 04:50 PM Flag
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Just wear whatever you wear to work. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:47 PM Flag
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OP doesn't work. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 04:50 PM Flag
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Where does she say that? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 06:17 PM Flag
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Since I assume DD has been accepted and you've signed the contract, stop overthinking this. They won't expel her. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 02:49 PM Flag
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They can counsel her out though. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 05:00 PM Flag
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Not if OP comes through with enough baksheesh each year. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 06:11 PM Flag
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Gold lame jumpsuit [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 04:49 PM Flag
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Orange jumpsuit. You've come from your job making license plates. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 06:11 PM Flag
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Dalton sweatshirt [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 02.20.18, 06:18 PM Flag
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