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[ - ] Are you taking a winter school break family vacation and if so where? 10 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:53 PM Flag
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Yes- Mexico [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:55 PM Flag
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where in mex? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:56 PM Flag
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mayakoba (riv maya) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:58 PM Flag
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amaze [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:14 PM Flag
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Is Mx safe again yet? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:02 PM Flag
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well, aside from all those american students' bodies they just found, I guess so? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:02 PM Flag
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np-- Parts of Mexico are deemed safe for U.S. travelers. (What American students?) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:16 PM Flag
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yep. Disney cruise [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:15 PM Flag
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Yes - Nicaragua [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 08:01 PM Flag
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where? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 08:09 PM Flag
[ - ] WOHMs of multiple school/preschool age kids, what is the minimum number of hours you need a nanny/housekeeper per week? What is the best balance between sanity and price. TYIA 6 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:52 PM Flag
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^^ assume nanny is willing to do whatever needs to be done including housekeeping. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:52 PM Flag
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20 hour week babysitter (assuming youngest is only 4 and has shorter days) and 25 hour housekeeper. I find that the combo doesn't work out well (either doesn't like to clean or can't help with homework) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:57 PM Flag
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who does kids laundry in this scenario and who cooks for the kids? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:02 PM Flag
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housekeeper does laundry in our house (we have this set-up) and preps dinner to pop in oven (grad student sitter pops in oven and gets rest ready for kids while doing homework). Our Housekeeper is there 5 days a week for 5-6 hours each day. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:06 PM Flag
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I would love any. 3 DCs...oldest is in 1st grade and afterschool program on-site. Younger two are in daycare. Our house is a mess. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:24 PM Flag
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our nanny works 25h/week but is flexible for holidays, early dismissals, etc. cleaners come every 2 weeks. i think it works out well. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:33 PM Flag
[ - ] Help me out: a few days back, someone posted an NYC Facebook group name where you can sell used kid's stuff. I lost that post. Any ideas what the group is? 3 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:51 PM Flag
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just donate it [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:53 PM Flag
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Craigslist [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:53 PM Flag
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Here are a few...NYC Parents swap group, Nyc baby stuff swap, nyc children's swap n meet group. I think that is in order of most active. Are you on UES? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:06 PM Flag
[ - ] Anyone try those root potatoe type chips from Trader joes? 4 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:50 PM Flag
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Huh? Potatoes are roots [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:56 PM Flag
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yes. and....? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:03 PM Flag
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So do you mean anyone try Trader Joe potato chips? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:09 PM Flag
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PotaTOE chips [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:14 PM Flag
[ - ] Ferguson shooting question: If Michael Brown and kept running from the officer telling him to stop, would the officer have been justified shooting him in the back? I suspect some people here believe "yes, he could have shot him". So Michael Brown was dead no matter what, because the cop was mad and had a gun. 47 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:49 PM Flag
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^^If Michael Brown HAD kept running.... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:49 PM Flag
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were you on the jury? did you hear all of the evidence in court? no, just from news media? ok then stfu and stop inciting riots and hate. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:53 PM Flag
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this. If you do not have knowledge of all the evidence (and I do mean ALL), then I agree, stfu. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:04 PM Flag
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+1000000000 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:04 PM Flag
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I did read the grand jury testimony. No one disputes that Michael Brown had been running away and the cop ordered him to stop. And the cop had already shot him once and drawn blood (also beyond dispute). So I was wondering what Michael Brown should have done to avoid being killed. He stopped, like the cop said. I know some people think that just because the cop had already shot him once in the car, they believe that of course Brown would choose to attack the cop again because that's so likely after he was running for his life. Putting up his hands? Naaa, why would he do that when he could run toward the guy who had already shot him once and was holding a gun on him? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:06 PM Flag
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This is what I told people after the OJ verdict. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:14 PM Flag
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to be fair that entire trial was on television for the public to watch [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:17 PM Flag
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And OJ was just as innocent as the Ferguson cop. The jury said so. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:25 PM Flag
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Do you know what standard the grand jury is supposed to apply? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:15 PM Flag
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i know i wasn't in the courtroom and neither were you, so stfu [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:17 PM Flag
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Apparently in addition to knowing nothing about the legal system, you also don't know how to capitalize English sentences. Not engaging further. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:20 PM Flag
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"not engaging further" is not a complete sentence. if you're going to be a grammar mom, at least have proper grammar. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:24 PM Flag
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He attacked the officer, twice. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:53 PM Flag
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were you on the jury? did you hear all of the evidence in court? no, just from news media? ok then stfu and stop inciting riots and hate. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:53 PM Flag
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You're completely insane. The people who heard the evidence in court agree with me, not with the people rioting and burning. Fucking asshole. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:09 PM Flag
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OP: I am not condoning the rioting and burning. I think it is wrong. But that doesn't mean I also don't think it is wrong to pretend that the shooting was justified and the cop did nothing wrong. It's scary to enable cops like the one who shot Michael Ferguson. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:12 PM Flag
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I have never assaulted an armed policeman and tried to take his gun, and then later in the same confrontation tried to charge him directly. But if I did I would certainly not be surprised to be shot and killed. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:14 PM Flag
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THIS! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:23 PM Flag
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Did you do this? Try to get away from a police officer and get shot in the process. Then run away as fast as you could. But when the police officer yelled "stop or I'll shoot", did you turn around and decide to "charge" the man holding the gun on you who had already shot you once? You didn't? Because it would be the most absurd action in the world and guarantee that you would die? Of course you didn't, but you assume that Michael Brown did it because he is young and Black and therefore does stupid things that guarantee he will die. And it is your assumption that he would act in a way that you or no one you knew ever would that sickens me. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:25 PM Flag
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That is not what happened. He was never shot while he was running away, he was shot while charging the policeman, enraged, a policeman he had already attacked once. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:46 PM Flag
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Yes, he was shot ONCE during the confrontation at the police car. Beyond dispute. And he ran away. Beyond dispute. What is disputed is whether he "changed his mind" after running away and being shot once, and decided to "charge" the policeman and commit suicide instead of giving up. You believe the more unlikely scenario, and I don't. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 08:02 PM Flag
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By the way, one of the "witnesses" who claims he charged the policeman is a racist who used the "N" word in his or her journal. It's in the evidence released by the grand jury. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 08:01 PM Flag
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You are just as bad as the people who are rioting. Who cares if you are right? What point are you trying to make by continuing to crow on and on about this case, and make crazy people angrier and angrier? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:18 PM Flag
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Says you. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:15 PM Flag
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And the black eyewitnesses [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:19 PM Flag
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Only a few out of the dozens. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:20 PM Flag
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I think that if someone accosts a uniformed police officer, threatens officer, punches officer and goes for his gun and then runs then YES the officer has the right to shoot to stop, not kill. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:57 PM Flag
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OP: That's what I thought. You are fine with police killing young men running away. By the way, the cop had ALREADY shot Michael Brown once, in the car. That is a documented fact. But you believe he had a right to chase after him and kill him regardless, which happens to be exactly what I thought people like you believed. Just wanted to have someone like you confirm it, so thank you for doing so. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:05 PM Flag
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Hi, OP. I get that you are just trying to incite drama, but the OR specifically said "has the right to shoot to stop, not kill". So your whole rambling angry post about "you are fine with police killing young men running away" sounds like you are drunk and unable to read. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:11 PM Flag
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I'm sorry, because it was obvious that Michael Brown was "stopped" after the first 5 shots, but some people believed the cop had to shoot him in the head with the last shot to properly "stop" him. So I assumed your definition of "stop" was the same as the Ferguson cops. Is it? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:13 PM Flag
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Nope. But, I wasn't on the jury and I didn't hear the evidence spelled out objectively without bias from either conservative or liberal news media, so I don't know what happened that day for sure. Neither do you. SO SHUT THE FUCK UP [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:21 PM Flag
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Fortunately, the grand jury testimony is available, and it shows how far away Michael Brown was from the cop when he was shot dead with 6 bullets, including the final kill shot to his head. And it also shows that he was ALREADY shot once in the car, and was running away from the officer. There is disputed evidence as to whether Michael Brown was then "charging" the officer who had already shot him once and was holding out a gun, and you obviously believe the few people who claim he ran toward the guy shooting at him instead of all the people who said he did not. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:29 PM Flag
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No it doesn't. she got the point. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:17 PM Flag
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+1. But let this have been a young white boy................. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:16 PM Flag
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what is young about michael brown? he was a fucking adult [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:25 PM Flag
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I would tend to think no unless he were a known murderer. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:56 PM Flag
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Basically people here don't give a shit, it's just another dead black kid. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:58 PM Flag
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They also prefer a racist country to a democracy. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:00 PM Flag
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The judicial process, thankfully, is NOT a direct democracy. That would be "mob rule." [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:30 PM Flag
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You mean just another dead adult man who was assaulting a police officer and got shot in the process. THAT is why I don't give a shit. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:12 PM Flag
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He got shot in the process of running away. But you are right - the cop was mad because he assaulted him and decided to enact the death penalty, which of course, is the proper penalty once you have hit a cop. You die, period. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:16 PM Flag
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Nope. You have no FUCKING CLUE what happened that day, and you weren't on the jury, and you didn't hear and see all of the evidence, you are just trying to incite riots and be a complete antisocial asshole who doesn't belong in society. But, for the record- if I started punching out a police man and tried to steal his gun, I would be the first person saying that it would be justified to shoot me. And actually, the testimony from the officer and from multiple witnesses was that he was running towards the officer, not away from him. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:23 PM Flag
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Give it a rest inciting riots mom. No one on UB is going to be rioting in Missouri. We are having a conversation, if you don't want to participate kindly go away. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:23 PM Flag
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The UNDISPUTED evidence is that he was shot once in the car and was running AWAY from the officer. Then there is disputed evidence as to whether he charged the man holding a gun who had already shot him once, or turning around and raised his hands. Since you tend to believe that young African-American teens always run TOWARD people who have guns after running away, because they have decided to commit suicide, then I can understand why you think the grand jury verdict was correct. Funny how those teens always seems to conveniently "change their mind" before being shot dead. They always run away, but somehow when they end up shot to death, it's because they "changed their mind" and decided a better action was to attack a man with a gun. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:33 PM Flag
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Ok. meanwhile Boston bomber gets a magazine cover and heart throb status. And school shooters get a sympathetic "where did we fail him" write up. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:16 PM Flag
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who is calling the boston bomber a heart throb? who the fuck are you? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:25 PM Flag
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Sieg heil! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:16 PM Flag
[ - ] How important is having family close by when you have DCs? I love my family and get so sad that we are so isolated from them since we're in nyc. They are about two hours away, so it's not terrible but I always wonder how much better my life would be if they were closer. 12 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:47 PM Flag
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How would it be better? My family is 8 hours a way and honestly I don't think it would matter if they lived over the river in NJ. They're not the type to "help" as in childcare, etc. I guess DD would see them more often. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:49 PM Flag
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Mine would help a ton. For example, I've been sick all week and would love to have my mom just swing by for a couple hours so I could rest (she doesn't work). They love spending time with DCs. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:54 PM Flag
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OR: that's very fortunate. I'm probably the odd person out, but my parents made it clear from the beginning that they weren't back-up anything. My SIL was very disappointed when she picked up roots to be closer to my parents (hoping they would help her out with childcare back-up, homeschooling, etc.). [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:58 PM Flag
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My MIL is 10 minutes away and sees my children multiple times a week. She is there as back up if the school nurse calls. She does not babysit (like ever) but is a meaningful part of my children's lives. If your relationship is good, it makes for a mutually beneficial relationship that is irreplaceable. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:51 PM Flag
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My parents live 5 minutes from me and it is awesome! My two-year old spends a weekend night with them almost every week and we eat dinner together every Sunday. My step-mom doesn't work and can almost always take care of her if daycare is closed and she is sick. My life as a WOHM is MUCH easier because of them! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:53 PM Flag
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That is so awesome. This is like my dream. I SAH, but it's the same idea of having a safety net and not feeling totally stranded or alone if tough circumstances arose. And obviously also the aspect of forging a strong bond. It's so tempting to move out of nyc because of this.. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:56 PM Flag
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It is helpful to have back up and it's great for dcs to have a close relationship w grandparents, aunts/uncles, cousins. But if your family is good, then 2 hours is not a big deal, at least not when kids are younger. it gets harder when they are in school and involved in activities and your life is busier and there's less time to drive 2 hours away to see family. but i have a friend whose parents are retired in FL and they will fly up to NYC to stay with their grandkids so she and her dh can go on vacation - at least once a year and usually some long weekends too. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:56 PM Flag
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Two hours away? You're lucky. My family lives on the other side of the world. And yes, my life would be better if they were closer. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:57 PM Flag
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I just had a baby and am seeing the value for sure. My husbands family is local and not only is it nice that they see the baby, they help with babysitting. It will be nice when I'm back to work too to have help.I wish my family was closer. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:07 PM Flag
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all our family has passed away. DC;s don't understand as 5 and 1 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:08 PM Flag
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We bought a four-unit building with DH's sister & her husband, DH's mother, and my parents. We each live in one apartment, but our doors are usually open until it gets cold out, and they're rarely locked. I'm a SAHM, so I watch my kids and SIL's kids, and when I need to go out to run errands, one of the grandparents steps in. If you like your family, I highly recommend living as close as possible and cutting all of the stress out of life. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:18 PM Flag
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Where do you live? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:28 PM Flag
[ - ] Still hungry after eating salad for lunch. :( 5 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:45 PM Flag
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In other news, water is wet. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:49 PM Flag
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Salad =/= meal [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:58 PM Flag
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You sound low-tone. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:03 PM Flag
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eat a piece of grilled chicken or a hard boiled egg [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:10 PM Flag
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You need protein to fill you [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:13 PM Flag
[ - ] Nanny here. Seriously why all the nanny hate on this board? Is it your insecurity that makes you miserable shrews? 25 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:43 PM Flag
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Until the end of time, there will always been a bizarre hostility between a woman and her nanny. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:44 PM Flag
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ita [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:48 PM Flag
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There are many good nannies out there, no question. But I also see mean, lazy, apathetic nannies all day long...this gets to you after awhile. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:43 PM Flag
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I love watching my lazy nanny at work with the hidden camera. She has fallen asleep on my sofa quite often when Im at work. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:47 PM Flag
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Jealous? Just as long as the children aren't awake and her duties are done. I wouldn't bat an eye. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:49 PM Flag
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You sound like you have a lot of down time at your job. Maybe you should be home caring for your own child [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:47 PM Flag
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Get you @$$ back to work, you sound like a nanny. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:51 PM Flag
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You complaining about your Nanny falling asleep on your time, but you're on ub on your bosses time. See where the hypocrisy can piss someone off? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:52 PM Flag
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yes! exactly [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:57 PM Flag
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She isn't getting paid by the hour. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:57 PM Flag
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What does that have to do with anything? She's still at work. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:01 PM Flag
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Says the hourly wage earner. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:08 PM Flag
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Don't you have something to do? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:29 PM Flag
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Good help is hard to find. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:03 PM Flag
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I think it's an extension of WOHM hate. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:03 PM Flag
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I thought my nanny was amazing. Watching her look for a new job and evaluate her options was an eye opening experience. She was looking for the absolute easiest job she could find. 1 baby, no housework and the easiest/least demanding family where her top priorities. She is great with older kids, helps my kids with home work, teaches them so much yet prefers to make a lot less just to do as little as possible. Its crazy [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:01 PM Flag
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Honestly. My next nanny job will be like that too. I'm at a point in my life that all that housework isn't worth the money. It's killer on the body. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:05 PM Flag
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Not even talking about housework... She is great with older kids and could make a lot more money because of that but would rather take 1 baby vs 2 older kids and 35% more money [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:52 PM Flag
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^^ partially because she has to cook for older kids (I guess that is housework but how lazy can you be?) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:53 PM Flag
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NP: it is not lazy to decide that you want an easier job. if you can afford to make less money, then that's fine IMO. not everyone is ambitious and that doesn't make them lazy. just like some parents choose the more flexible job or the one without long hours in exchange for less money so that they can be home more. what is lazy, is not doing the job you were hired for. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:57 PM Flag
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why is it crazy? maybe she is a little burnt out and rather save her energy for her own life - it happens [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 08:09 PM Flag
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Go work. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:30 PM Flag
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it's the "shrew" poster again! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:48 PM Flag
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Read "The Handmaid's Tale" [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:48 PM Flag
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I loved my nanny and we still keep in touch. She was amazing. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 08:02 PM Flag
[ - ] Post the initials of the biggest bitch you know: 19 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:42 PM Flag
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YOU [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:42 PM Flag
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;) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:44 PM Flag
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Yvette Olivia Unger? I know her! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:45 PM Flag
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Eevey? OMG!!! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:54 PM Flag
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;) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:07 PM Flag
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A. Rubenstein [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:43 PM Flag
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Patsy D [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:48 PM Flag
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...o... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:01 PM Flag
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lol [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 08:02 PM Flag
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TG [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:53 PM Flag
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AC [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:53 PM Flag
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I am watching for my initials. :) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:59 PM Flag
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Le!la G@r@daghi [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:04 PM Flag
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OP [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:21 PM Flag
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MK [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:32 PM Flag
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KBM [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:49 PM Flag
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PZ [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:49 PM Flag
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RM [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:49 PM Flag
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EB [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 08:02 PM Flag
[ - ] Bf wants me to go with him to Philly for the holiday to visit his cousins. However, I am seriously thinking of ending our relationship bc he has yet to ask me to marry and he told me that would happen when I was pg with our db. I don't really feel like being around all of them esp. since I feel like they think I am a chump. 11 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:40 PM Flag
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You ARE a chump if he requires a pregnancy to marry. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:46 PM Flag
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ITA. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:49 PM Flag
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And he still didn't [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:58 PM Flag
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This [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:05 PM Flag
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+1 but sorry, OP - is that really the guy you want to marry and have children with? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:48 PM Flag
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It seems odd that you don't have your Thanksgiving plans nailed down already. Did you agree to go and now you're changing your mind? How old is DB? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:48 PM Flag
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db is 16 mos. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:52 PM Flag
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Yeah, you're not getting married. Either learn to live with that, or dump him and move on. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:22 PM Flag
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Can't believe you fell for that. Gl getting child support out of that asshole. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:27 PM Flag
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You have a kid with him and your plan is to break things off during the holidays? What are you smoking? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:40 PM Flag
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The weed in troll land is very good. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:46 PM Flag
[ - ] most giving nanny off only Thurs? or Thurs and Fri? 28 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:31 PM Flag
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No the nannies work [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:35 PM Flag
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this [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:36 PM Flag
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I have both days off, so she'll have both days off. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:34 PM Flag
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+1 She's going to Jamaica. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:43 PM Flag
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Whos going to clean up after Thanksgiving? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:37 PM Flag
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I'll leave everything out until she comes back to work on Monday, obv. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:40 PM Flag
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No joke... My parents' friends' live in help is coming over because they are Canadian and they don't need her that day. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:44 PM Flag
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I work friday so she is working friday. Last year I was off friday so she was off. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:36 PM Flag
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I'm an MD and I work Thurs and Fri both, so so does my nanny. Chew on THAT! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:37 PM Flag
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It sounds so obnoxious when you say it [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:41 PM Flag
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Trust me, they can't help it. Doctors are required to drop that piece of info within 45 seconds of meeting anyone. Trust me, I live it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:43 PM Flag
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Yes, MDs and HYP both have the same disease. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:43 PM Flag
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If I just said "my nanny is working thanksgiving", I'd get flamed ot high heaven and you know it. You have to clarify why your nanny is working thanksgiving. Don't be daft. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:45 PM Flag
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Could have just said "because I'm working." Also, the "Chew on THAT!" was obnoxious. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:46 PM Flag
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because the whole point of this post is to flame people whose nannies are working the day after thanksgiving. i was just giving them- and you, apparently- something extra to flame, and clearly it worked. happy holidays! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:48 PM Flag
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Wouldn't have flamed you for nanny working if you were working. Puzzling that you can't see that your response was rude. Really hope you are not my MD! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:49 PM Flag
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why do you care if your MD is a cherubic, polite, friendly, gracious human being? i care that mine knows his shit and gets excellent results. assuming doctors are superhuman is stupid. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:52 PM Flag
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Well, don't be the asshole that comes into the ER for a sprained ankle on Thanksgiving and I won't be. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:52 PM Flag
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you can't just say I'm working? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:47 PM Flag
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I did that once, when someone had a similar question about nannies and Memorial day. I got flamed and was told I needed to take the day off and actually be a parent to my children. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:54 PM Flag
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Did you say that you were a doctor? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:55 PM Flag
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No, but I said "I can't take off work, i'm an ER doctor and memorial day is my scheduled holiday for the summer" after I got flamed for not loving my kids enough to not work on the holidays. So, this time, I prefaced my statement with the fact that I was a doctor so that you people wouldn't flame me. But UBers like to flame MDs any way they can, for some reason. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:11 PM Flag
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No one would have reacted to your post minus the bizarrely hostile "chew on THAT!" [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:27 PM Flag
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My nanny has Wed, Thu and Fri off b/c I have Wed, Thu and Fri off [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:38 PM Flag
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Both days. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:45 PM Flag
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But in my old job Friday wasn't a vaca day so she had to work. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:44 PM Flag
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DH and I both work Friday, so nanny works Friday. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:46 PM Flag
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I usually give nanny both days off. But neither DH nor I have Friday off as a matter of course, so on occasion, I've had her come in for the day on Friday. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:54 PM Flag
[ - ] I just don't think that Selena Gomez is a ver good singer or that Ariana Grande either. Why is there no younger talented people in the music industry? 14 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:30 PM Flag
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debbie gibson and britney spears way more talented though [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:31 PM Flag
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Say what you will about Britney, but she has an it factor that neither of these 3 have. Selena is pretty, but boring and Ariana Grande is a troll with the entire Mac counter on her face. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:36 PM Flag
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izzy azaleah or whatever is also zzzzz. i don't know who ariana is. what is the factor that britney has? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:42 PM Flag
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What about Demi Lovato? Cringe. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:39 PM Flag
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kathy perry [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:42 PM Flag
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When AG sings, she sounds like she's breathing instead of singing. You also don't understand a word she's saying. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:41 PM Flag
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Mugging for the camera the whole time with that tight ponytail. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:44 PM Flag
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There are plenty of talented young musicians and singers. You're just looking in the wrong places. Every watch "Later...with Jools Holland" on Palladia? That show is deep with talent. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:42 PM Flag
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I love Palladia. Daryl's House! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:01 PM Flag
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OR: Doesn't Daryl look fab after all these years? Love his house too. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:05 PM Flag
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It's not about the talent. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:43 PM Flag
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People like you follow the untalented wannabes? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:49 PM Flag
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Ariana Grande really does have talent. The way she sings isn't my cup of tea, and I think the songs she sings are pap, but she has actual skill as a vocalist. Selena Gomez, I can't tell at all. Has anyone ever heard her non-autotuned voice singing?? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:58 PM Flag
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They're talented, just not at what you think they should be talented at. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:02 PM Flag
[ - ] I dealt with the bitchiest woman on the phone today in a professional setting. I've never encountered someone so passive aggressive. I don't expect to deal with her again in person, but she may be tangentially involved in certain things related to my work. I'm halfway temped to call her boss and explain how rude she was, but I don't want that to backfire on me. I know I should let it go, but I've been replaying it over and over again in my head and it's really messing with me. Advice? 6 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:29 PM Flag
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pity her. Anyone this rude probably has a bad life and she's taking it out on you. Happy people are pleasant to everyone IMO. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:28 PM Flag
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This [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:32 PM Flag
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op: She was mistaken about something, and I explained that her colleague had already okayed the proposal (as had a higher up.) She seemed really angry and took this out on me saying I was "crazy" for thinking that was okay. (She never pointed out any potential issues, was just pissed she was out of the loop.) I needed a document from her. Called earlier and spoke to her colleague and was told I could email x person for the document. X person never responded, so I called back and she picked up. I explained that I hadn't gotten a response from x and is there someone else I can email? She got all pissy that I hadn't filled out and faxed a request form, and I told her that her colleague said an email would be fine. She then got really mad and said I was "crazy" for thinking I could bypass the fax. And "no one has ever even suggested that before." as if some appeal to conformity would shame me or something. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:31 PM Flag
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maybe you are the bitch [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:35 PM Flag
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I just dealt with someone exactly like this for an event I just did. Similar situations like this occurred over the span of a month. I ignored her crazy and she eventually gave up her micromanaging craziness. People like this are pathologically like this. I don't know why they have jobs. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:34 PM Flag
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Oh, I get it. You're that person. You called her up wanting what you wanted right now, and then you dropped the "well I already talked to someone higher up than you, who do I need to talk to to get this done right now?" Are you in your 20s? How do you not yet know how to handle these people? You have to appeal to their delusions of grandeur. You have to say "listen, I know I'm putting you out, but Steve said he'd send something and he didn't and now I'm getting pressure from my boss. What should I do to get this document from you soon?" [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:35 PM Flag
[ - ] Women who married "good enough" guys who weren't Prince Charmings but who turned out to be really great DHs: Tell your story. 9 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:26 PM Flag
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That's me what do want to know? DH was not my "type" when we met, but good enough. Now 12 years later, he is an amazing husband and father. Couldn't be happier [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:29 PM Flag
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op: What made you realize that he was more than just good enough? Was it a sudden realization one day or slow transition? What was the process like? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:33 PM Flag
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There was no one day. Going through life together is what did it for me. Going through bad time and good times. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:36 PM Flag
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i find your question frightening. why on earth would you think there is a prince charming out there? it sets unrealistic expectations for a dh that no man could ever fill. there is no man out there who will swoop into your life and make all of your problems go away. and, frankly, if that is what you are looking for, you are doomed to fail. find a partner. live your life together, taking what comes your way and you will be happy. and grow the F up! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:42 PM Flag
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All sane women do exactly this. Women who are looking for perfection end up with narcissists. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:49 PM Flag
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This. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:57 PM Flag
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+2 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:03 PM Flag
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I married someone I thought was "good enough" and then over time I realized he was actually Prince Charming and I was just a stupid idiot for not seeing it right away. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:58 PM Flag
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Me. Smart witty guy, but I always liked the "bad" ones. He turned out to be the best. Fabulous life, great father, amazing career, joint interests (politics, economics, reading, travel). Very very compatible, I just didn't know it at the time. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:01 PM Flag
[ - ] I'm a "SAHM" and when people ask what I do I say I'm a full time mom. Not a day goes by where I "stay at home" all day, so SAHM seems less accurately descriptive than "full time mom." I saw a WOHM on here get offended by this recently, and I think that offensive is out of line. It's not a commentary on your QUALITY of parenting, it's a simple quantitative statement. Just like saying a doctor who works part time is not a commentary on that doctor's quality or lack thereof. It's simply an economic designation in terms of hours out in. The activity you spend the majority of your waking hours doing is your full time job. If you WOH, no you are not a full time parent. But that doesn't mean your quality of parenting is any less than someone who is a full time mom. So I will continue to say I'm a full time mom when asked my profession rather than "stay at home mom." Flame away. 83 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:25 PM Flag
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Awww, it seems like you really spent a lot of brain power putting that long post together. Good for you, sweetie. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:26 PM Flag
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op: Nope, took all of twenty seconds. I guess your brain just works much more slowly than mine. That sucks. How long would it have taken you to write these few sentences? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:28 PM Flag
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I was being sarcastic. You sound like an idiot, is that easier for you to comprehend? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:29 PM Flag
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op: you were trolling and have nothing pertinent to add to the argument because your IQ is too low, so you result to name calling. Go back to your reality tv shows, dear. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:42 PM Flag
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What was that? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:43 PM Flag
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Honestly, you were trolling by this stupid post, OP. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:51 PM Flag
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ILY. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:36 PM Flag
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+1 OP sounds so pretty. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:40 PM Flag
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I gotcha and ITA with what you're saying. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:28 PM Flag
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+1 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:29 PM Flag
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You're a SAHM. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:29 PM Flag
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Yes, you're a SAHM. And a full time mom. Both are accurate descriptions. Use whichever term you prefer. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:30 PM Flag
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And you're defensive about both titles. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:51 PM Flag
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+1 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:56 PM Flag
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This. Just because you don't physically stay inside the house all day doesn't mean shit. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:50 PM Flag
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Shit, I'm not a parent full time? Holy fuck let me go partying. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:29 PM Flag
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Would you go party if you became a part time doctor? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:35 PM Flag
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You don't have to be a full time mom to be a great mom. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:35 PM Flag
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OR I wasn't aware that I stopped being a mom (good or bad) simply while I went to work. What about if I went to the doctor's office? What about when the kids are in school? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:37 PM Flag
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Your relationship didn't stop but yes your job as a full time mother stopped when you outsourced it to someone else [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:49 PM Flag
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Backtracking... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:48 PM Flag
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I don't see being a mother as a 'job,' it's just who I am, all of the time. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:51 PM Flag
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+1 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:41 PM Flag
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"parenting from afar" lol [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:39 PM Flag
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i find that answering it with "i'm home with the kids" as opposed to making it a job title is really a better answer. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:27 PM Flag
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ITA [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:32 PM Flag
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This; no need to take a dig at the other side - just do what makes you happy. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:32 PM Flag
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I like this answer [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:36 PM Flag
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Exactly. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:52 PM Flag
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Housewife [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:51 PM Flag
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Perfect [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:56 PM Flag
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This isn't much different than "stay at home"...I thought OP's point was that she doesn't want to sound like she just lounges with them at home all day. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:12 PM Flag
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or: no one really thinks this except on UB. my point is simply that trying to make it into a job title or to make it seem like you are doing something more than those moms who work, is silly. i am home with the kids. if someone were to ask how i spend my time with them, i would answer accordingly. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:59 PM Flag
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I'll grant that you're a full-time caregiver, but no mom (or dad for that matter) is only a PT parent. Parenting is not about hours logged. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:31 PM Flag
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ITTTTA [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:32 PM Flag
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This! Your "full time job" is caregiver. Being a mom doesn't stop when you decide to WOH. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:35 PM Flag
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I am a SAHM and ITA with this. Yes, I do the bulk of the caregiving, especially on the weekdays. But my DH is every bit as "full time" of a parent as I am. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:38 PM Flag
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This! And the doctor analogy, FWIW, is just stupid. A doctor who works part time is still a doctor all the time- whether she is in the office, at home, asleep, whatever. A mom is still a mom whether she is in the office, at home, asleep, whatever. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:01 PM Flag
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op: you're proving my point for me. A part time doctor still holds the identity of doctor even though that is not their full time job. Just like WOHMs still have the identity of mother even if their job isn't a full time mom [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:29 PM Flag
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NP: No. You either view something as an identity or you view it as a job. It can't be both at the same time. And if you view something as an identity, you would never say "I am a part-time X". [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:56 PM Flag
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Your analogy actually proves the opposite of your point. A doctor doesn't stop being a doctor when they step out of the hospital/exam room. Which is why you said "a doctor who works part time." [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:32 PM Flag
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I'm a SAHM but I think saying "full time mom" is stupid. It's not a job; all moms are full time moms. Technically a mom who works full time only does so 40-50 hours (or whatever a week). Does that mean you, as a full time mom, only work 40-50 hours a week? Part-time and full-time only work as descriptors of employment. Once you have a child you are a mom or dad, period. No one is a part time parent. I would never say that my dh is a part time dad. You can say you are a full time mom as much as you want but people are going to think you are an obnoxious, insufferable idiot. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:34 PM Flag
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ILY [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:35 PM Flag
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+1. Parenting is a relationship, and arguably, a lifetime gig. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:38 PM Flag
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It's a relationship for life, and also a job during the child's first 18 years if life [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:47 PM Flag
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It's a duty, not a job, IMO. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:49 PM Flag
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Right on! I find this post ridiculous in its premise. Like, if she' s an SAHM and calls herself a full time mom then WOHM cannot be full time moms! I WOHM and I am a full time mom. And I don't outsource childcare -- my kids go to school and then take afterschool classes that, conveniently, pick them up. And for the record, I would not feel offended if she called herself a full time mom, I'm just offended by her explanation that that means I am not a full time mom. Geez woman (OP), take that chip off your shoulder. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:57 PM Flag
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Exactly. A doctor is a doctor. She may *practice* PT, but she's still a doctor. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:13 PM Flag
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Wow, you sound like someone who is actually secure in her decision to stay at home, and you are probably raising happy, well-adjusted children. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:02 PM Flag
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Not insecure about being a SAHM, huh? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:33 PM Flag
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This. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:36 PM Flag
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right? what a pathetic post. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:45 PM Flag
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Let me explain it to you hon: you're Staying Away from Full Time Work so SAH describes it. Every parent is a full time parent, because we are all parents all the time, just as we are full time daughters. If you were taking care of you aging grandma, you'd put it that way (i'm full time caregiver to...) rather than saying 'I'm a Full Time Granddaughter'. Does that help? Also...once your kids are in school, not sure the majority of your hours are spent parenting right? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:33 PM Flag
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If kids are in school from 8-3 and she's parenting from 3 to bedtime and in the mornings then yes the majority of her time is spent parenting [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:44 PM Flag
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Let's assume you also don't count as a parent if your DC are asleep. So you are only a mom from 7-8 and 3-8. Oh no! You're a part-time parent too! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:44 PM Flag
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NP: WOHPs "parent" too. So we're talking about three hours between 3pm and 6pm difference. THAT makes OP a FT parent and her DH not? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:47 PM Flag
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OR: What is parenting exactly? If her kids are watching TV, is she parenting, or do they have to be playing creative games with her? I have done all combos of working full time, part time and staying home and none has made me more or less a parent. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:46 PM Flag
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No, I'm sorry, you are not parenting when you're at work. Otherwise why are you paying to outsource the child are to a nanny during those hours? You are only "parenting" in the work sense when you are with your kids. If you're at an office 8 hours today and paying a nanny to watch your kids during that time, your full time job is not full time mom. Make sense? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:46 PM Flag
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It's not making sense to anyone but you and the the one "I gotcha" OR above. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:45 PM Flag
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You're not CAREGIVING when you're at work. Being a parent means more than physically being there. Signed, SAHM to 4 DCs. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:48 PM Flag
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They're looking at a picture of the kids on their desk and ordering shit from Tea Collection while the nanny is actually, you know, raising them. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:50 PM Flag
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NP Pity you think caregiving is the same as raising. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:52 PM Flag
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Who is raising the OP's DC while she debates the definition of "mother" on the internet? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:50 PM Flag
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my god you are so insecure! stop embarrasing yourself. insecurity shows. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:37 PM Flag
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You sound stupid. Maybe you should have kept your job. You still would have been a full time mom anyway. And you have way too much time on your hands to be so self congratulatory with so little reason. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:42 PM Flag
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I don't think this is so much about "quality" as the ridiculous implication that WOHMs aren't moms all of the time. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:44 PM Flag
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Don't you know, as long as you give the nanny the master list of which organic foods the kids are allowed to eat and pop in for a bedtime story, you're a "full time parent" [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:48 PM Flag
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I feel sorry for your DH. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:50 PM Flag
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Can't you see how your statement suggests that parents who work are not "full time parents," and how that insinuation is both incorrect and insulting? I'm a SAHM (I was a teacher before I had my second child, and will go back to that career when my kids are older. When people ask me what I do, I say "I'm a teacher, but I'm not working right now." Can't you see how that statement is more neutral and less offensive? Do you have no other facets of your identity such that "mom" is the only way you can describe yourself to others? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:49 PM Flag
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Being incorrect and insulting was the whole point! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:49 PM Flag
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Oh, she sees that it's insulting - why do you think she says it/ [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:52 PM Flag
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I always thought it was weirder when people need to identify themselves by what they USED to do. Hello, you are not currently a teacher. There's nothing wrong with that-- I am a SAHM too-- but let's be honest. You are not currently working as a teacher, why not own your current identity instead? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:52 PM Flag
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Stay focused here, guys. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:53 PM Flag
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Why does current identity matter? I worked for a number of years as an artist but I'm now a lawyer too. I didn't stop being an artist per se, just have shifted my focus. That's life. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:56 PM Flag
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Oh shut up. If I ask someone what they do, I am interested in what they've done in the past for work (as well as what they might plan to do in the future), even if they currently SAH. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:55 PM Flag
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When someone tells me they are a SAH mom I usually want to know what they did before, but I haven't found a non-rude way of asking this. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 08:24 PM Flag
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And what kind of a response do you get when you say it? Curious...imagine most of us, SAH or WOH, would recoil from your smugness. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:52 PM Flag
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I get where you are trying to go with this argument (besides the obvious trolling) but you have to see that the flip side is that it means that a parent isn't a parent if they aren't physically with their child at the moment which obviously isn't true. I do think it is time for a new term for SAHM as it isn't accurate for how they spend their day but full time mom is not a good option. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:52 PM Flag
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NMEM - non-money earning mom [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:55 PM Flag
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Why the need for labels at all? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:56 PM Flag
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I just say I am a homemaker. That is what I do, I make sure the home keeps going. I know WOHMs also keep a home going, but they only work at it part time. I am full time in my position. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:58 PM Flag
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+ [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:14 PM Flag
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Sigh. You got what you want. Welcome to the Most Popular list. Ladies, can we please stop responding to these ridiculous posts trying to pit SAHMs and WOHMs against each other?? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 08:11 PM Flag
[ - ] Does anyone else here not need to do things like punishment/time outs with their young DCs? I know it sounds like VBA, but my DS is very compliant/easy going and I have never had to resort to this. anyone else BTDT? 15 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:25 PM Flag
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How old? I was apparently like this as a young child, but was a holy terror as a teenager. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:33 PM Flag
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2.5. Yes, I realize that I still have many years ahead of me...lol. It just seems like aggression breeds aggression, so I am always very calm and non-punitive with him and he is so well-behaved. The parents/nannies screaming at their young kids: "you;re getting a time-out!" always have the most ill-behaved kids, imo. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:35 PM Flag
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OK then, good luck! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:36 PM Flag
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How is a timeout aggressive? BTW, screaming about a timeout is not a timeout done right. I once had a parent ask me what happens if I get to "3" and it's been so long since I got there I had to stop and think for a minute. It usually only takes one calm "1." [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:39 PM Flag
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You're right, it wouldn't necessarily need to be aggressive, but it often seems like caregiver do present it this way. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:38 PM Flag
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I have a very strong-willed son who needs this all the time. Just count yourself lucky. Have you made it to five, yet. There are possibly bumpy patches in your future, if not. Consistency is key. Unfortunately, my husband is not consistent, and I pay the price. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:37 PM Flag
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Yes, my oldest is a pleaser and a disappointed look from me is punishment enough. #2 isn't like this at all [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:40 PM Flag
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^ and LOL at you for writing about your 2.5 yo behavior... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:40 PM Flag
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yes, i acknowledged i still have a long way to go, but i see much younger children being threatened/punished all the time [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:42 PM Flag
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Personally I don't think punishment is all that effective until dcs are at least 2 1/5 or 3. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:49 PM Flag
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Compliant & easy going are innate traits. It has absolutely nothing to do with you. Come back & post when you have strong willed, intense & independent to work with, sanctimonious mom. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:46 PM Flag
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god, I know. I wasn't trying to brag about parenting skills. I was just wondering about others' experiences. In fact, I'm glad that's the case if there's no way I can mess things up at this point. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:51 PM Flag
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Don't congratulate yourself too early. Many very mild kids I know hit 3 and chose then to start giving their parents holy hell. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:47 PM Flag
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I'm not, believe me! Thanks for the heads up. I have heard that 3 can be very difficult. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:53 PM Flag
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Both of my DS (8 and 5) have always been like this. The most I ever have to do is count to three (and I've never really thought about what happens if I get to three...they respond right away). I take NO credit. It's just their personalities. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:15 PM Flag
[ - ] OMG, this board is full of clueless racists. I fear for America's future. We are headed down a bad road. 2 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:25 PM Flag
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Yeah and remember, they all went to HYP (gulp) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:45 PM Flag
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yeah right. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:59 PM Flag
[ - ] What would you think about someone who had a baby with her husband, and then, a year later divorced him and is now with a woman? 9 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:22 PM Flag
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Um, does her first name start with "A"? This is very similar to someone I know. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:25 PM Flag
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No it doesn't....but what were your thoughts on this type of situation? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:29 PM Flag
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OK so it's my sister. She married too young IMO, and they had a baby right away. He was actually cheating on her the whole time, so she left him. I was happy she made that choice. She is now engaged 2 years later to a woman. I don't know if she was maybe always gay, but felt pressured to marry a man or if it's just a reaction to what happened with her husband. She seems really happy though, so that's all that matters to me. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:32 PM Flag
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I'd think she realized she was gay [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:32 PM Flag
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But wanted to have a baby first? This part puzzles me... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:35 PM Flag
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My coworker's ex wife did this, yeah. He's now remarried and the new wife mothers both kids [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:46 PM Flag
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She preferred the ex to an unknown sperm donor? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:54 PM Flag
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right, which I guess is understandable. But I wonder how the ex feels about being treated as a sperm donor. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:00 PM Flag
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I wouldn't give a shit. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:29 PM Flag
[ - ] DS is getting horrible grades. WWYD? sit down with him everyday and go through his assignments? 9 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:21 PM Flag
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how old? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:21 PM Flag
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17 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:32 PM Flag
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11 OP [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:35 PM Flag
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At this age, I would make sure I knew what his assignments were so I could check he had done them. I would also go over it to make sure he had done it right. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:36 PM Flag
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Yes. find out what he is having trouble in. Was this all of a sudden in all subjects? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:41 PM Flag
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yes. Granted, MS is harder than ES but this is ridiculous. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:51 PM Flag
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He's cashed out. Doesn't care. Find out why. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 06:59 PM Flag
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np. The transition to MS can be difficult for some. Have you talked to his teachers to identify the problems? Is he not turning in hw? Not doing well on tests? Not behaving in class? Start by isolating the problem areas. And then yes, sit down with him at the start of HW time every evening, make a game plan, and then have him check in with you when he's done. You won't have to do it forever. He'll get the hang of it! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:03 PM Flag
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It's relatively easy to get bad grades in middle school, even for good students. all you need is a couple of silly mistakes and its a C or even a D. They are not graded for effort any more but for result, and getting 2 questions out of 5 wrong is very easy. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.25.14, 07:25 PM Flag
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