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[ - ] Autism moms...I am concerned about my 14 mo. He seems friendly and social. Has words and seems to understand what I am saying. Shows affection to me and his sister. However, he still does not point with one finger and flaps his hands when excited. What do you think? Please help with advice... 9 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:23 PM Flag
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If he has autism it's not like you can do anything about it [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:25 PM Flag
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np: troll...the earlier its caught the better the outcome [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:26 PM Flag
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Not necessarily true [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:43 PM Flag
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Mention your concerns to your doctor. Keep an eye on it, but don't waste time worrying. Worry never accomplished anything [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:44 PM Flag
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I do not think your child has autism. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:35 PM Flag
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If you're concerned, get him evaluated. I don't think diagnoses from internet strangers will help you or your son at all. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:41 PM Flag
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My son flapped his hands when excited. No biggie. Pointing with a finger, like all developmental milestones, can have a range of normal. I wouldn't worry. My doctor does an autism spectrum check starting at 15 or 18 months. You can ask yours if you're really worried, but this all sounds normal, especially that he has words and shows affection. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:41 PM Flag
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ITA. Stop worrying [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:43 PM Flag
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As a mother of two kids on the spectrum, this doesn't sound like an obvious case of Autism but call EI if you're concerned. It's what they are there for. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 03:07 PM Flag
[ - ] Besides DVF, which designers or brands make work-appropriate wrap dresses? Saw a woman wearing a really pretty short-sleeved wrap dress on subway and should have asked her where it was from. 15 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:16 PM Flag
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Nanette Lepore [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:28 PM Flag
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np. They seem very short. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:24 PM Flag
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I've seen knock off ones at Macy's and Bloomingdale's -- I'd try dept stores for affordable versions [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:21 PM Flag
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Thanks. Thinking Lord & Taylor which is near my office. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:21 PM Flag
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Oh, definitely! I was surprised by the cute stuff at bloomingdales last time i was there - basic stuff for work, etc. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:23 PM Flag
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The 59th street location overwhelms me but maybe I'll try it at an "off" time. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:26 PM Flag
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I find the SoHo location of Bloomingdale's much more manageable [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:34 PM Flag
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Agreed. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:40 PM Flag
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Boden [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:39 PM Flag
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banana republic. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:31 PM Flag
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OP that's one of my usual suspects but they only have long-sleeve wrap dresses. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:37 PM Flag
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i actually long the long sleeves ones - i just roll them up a bit in the summer right below my elbows. i like the way it looks. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:52 PM Flag
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This! I have one I bought there ten years ago and it's still going strong. Been with me through two pregnancies. No matter my size or the occasion, it always works. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:52 PM Flag
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OP that's great to know. I have a DVF wrap dress that I bought on sale when I was pregnant with DC#1 a few years ago and have worn it through 2 pregnancies and post-pregnancies. Love it but don't want to spend full price on another. I am still a big fan of Banana so will try on their wrap dresses. Appreciate your feedback! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:45 PM Flag
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The reviews of the Gemma wrap dress are kind of hilarious. There seems to be a love vs hate aspect to all of them. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:47 PM Flag
[ - ] Our two children just turned 3 but we haven't started saving for college yet. Paying for a full-time nanny and private pre-school does not allow for this. It makes me worried though. 19 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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Toddler 07.23.14, 02:12 PM Flag
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well they'll be in K soon enough. Will you do public then? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:06 PM Flag
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we are in the same situation. :( fortunately, my mom set up a 529 that she is contributing too for my DD-- this may be the only college $ my DD has because I frankly don't know how we can save any more. We are lucky. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:16 PM Flag
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Same here. My parents and ILs will be funding our dad's education. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:13 PM Flag
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if you don't save, you don't have to pay for college. It's basically free for irresponsible people. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:22 PM Flag
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Flippant, and accurate. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:22 PM Flag
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How is this accurate? How is a loan free? One has to pay back loans taken out for college, either on behalf of the child, or the child themselves have to pay back loans? Unless your kids gets into HYP there is no "free" or scholarship money for college for middle-class children. There are only loans. And needing those loans makes your child a less desirable candidate for admission. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:24 PM Flag
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well, at most of the Ivies (and a few others), there are need-based options. They consider savings first, so technically, it is true that you could get more $ (in grants, not loans) by having saved less. Most of the Ivies are need-blind so financial needs would not be considered (except in cases of the super-rich). [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:28 PM Flag
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Do you and DH both work FT? If not, you should. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:24 PM Flag
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OP: Yes, we work full time and our children will go to public school but we are expecting a third child. Our parents are not wealthy so I don't see any funds coming from that side. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:16 PM Flag
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You need to stop procreating. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:37 PM Flag
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Oh please. She could be an amazing parent for all you know [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 03:50 PM Flag
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It's really hard to save for college when money is tight. I have a 529 set-up for both of my kids and when I'm really pinched, I try to find at least $25 a month to contribute to each account. It's not much, but it's something. Don't feel like you have to contribute thousands per month. In the end it adds up and the sooner you start the better. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:15 PM Flag
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Same here. We're living on dh's salary so budget is very tight [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:19 PM Flag
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We opened up a regular brokerage account and save $ that way. If we don't need it (something urgent) it's theirs . We don't have enough disposable income to save solely for college expenses [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:20 PM Flag
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You can't it away even 100 each per month with auto deduct? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:32 PM Flag
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...put away [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:22 PM Flag
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do you have other savings? I don't believe it has to be a special separate account. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 03:03 PM Flag
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whats your hhi? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 03:04 PM Flag
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+1. And as much as I loved our nanny (we did a share with #1), if I had it to do over I'd do daycare. Our #1 goes to public and #2 will also, we both WOHM f/t, each kid gets $100 toward their college savings per month at this point. Hopefully when #2 goes into school f/t (next fall!) we can do some serious catching up. OP: you need to stop at 3 kids, if things are already tight! I love our own little unplanned bundle of joy (our #2) but she definitely caused us to have to rethink things, and take permanent steps to have no more babies. DH got snipped, he's had no problems since. GL. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 03:05 PM Flag
[ - ] This scene unfolding at the airport in Amsterdam is profoundly touching. 8 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:06 PM Flag
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What's happening? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:22 PM Flag
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the bodies of the plane victims are arriving in state. They have at least 50-60 hearses lined up and soldiers are carrying the remains. It's incredibly respectful and moving [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:39 PM Flag
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Soldiers? I wonder why soldiers. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:44 PM Flag
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why not, who else to carry them? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 03:05 PM Flag
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You sound stupid. You suggest they start drafing dozens and dozens of strangers on the street to carry 200 different remains? Soldiers provide a note of gravitas and state formality. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 03:11 PM Flag
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That womsn who lost two sons makes me cry. Cannot stand it. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:35 PM Flag
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too bad the Dutch won't seek retaliation. their economic dependency on Russia is more important to them than doing the right thing. unfortunately. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:32 PM Flag
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What is the dependency? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:57 PM Flag
[ - ] I hate pregnancy discrimination at work place. Anyone BTDT? 25 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:05 PM Flag
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I think you need to be more specific...what's going on? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:07 PM Flag
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+1 [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:10 PM Flag
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When I was a legal secretary I had really awkward interactions with the attorney I was assigned to, who was having round after round of IVF. She requested that I be switched with another attorney's secretary. No problem with my work and the new attorney I got was an anal retentive PITA. I never did anything about it, though. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:11 PM Flag
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Basically I was pregnant and the IVF kept failing. She had kind of a breakdown at some point. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:12 PM Flag
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Did you lose your job, less hours, or a promotion opportunity? If not, it isn't discrimination. All lawyers are assholes and bitches, especially those that work at small firms and don't make a lot of money. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:20 PM Flag
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Nothing like that, basically my duties just ramped up for the other attorney. He was one of those types that needed everything done 3 times and he had a much different idea of the scope of what a secretary was supposed to do. I didn't last long anyway. I didn't go back after maternity leave. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:25 PM Flag
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I do remember finding it really unfair that it seemed to be such a personal thing on her part when I was perfectly good at my job, but sometimes it's just the way stuff goes. Like I said, I didn't pursue it. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:27 PM Flag
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Wait, you took paid leave and then didn't return? Did you tell them you weren't coming back? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:44 PM Flag
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No, I had planned to come back until we found out my dd needed surgery when she was about 4 months old, so that wasn't compatible with going back to work. I didn't plan it that way. (BTW dd is fine today) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:45 PM Flag
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maybe you just werent nice to be around [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:28 PM Flag
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Agree. Seems highly unlikely the attorney switched her because she was jealous of the pregnancy. And is it a coincidence the new attorney she was assigned was a 'PITA' and it didn't work out?! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:36 PM Flag
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No, I knew. I was told by HR that she admitted it was just too difficult to see me every day and listen to talk about babies. I didn't think it was fair but I just said that I understood. The guy I went to work for was very well known for being demanding. I was actually his 2nd secretary since the one who had been with him for a very long time (an older woman) was wanting a shorter work day because she had a sick husband. She had been with him for 20 years, he was not letting her go, but he needed someone else. They brought in a temp for the first attorney who was still there when I left. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:42 PM Flag
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Maybe that's why the office threw me a surprise baby shower. Because no one liked me. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:43 PM Flag
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oh sweet jesus, they do that for everyone. you sound like the "world's first pregnant woman". we all know her. she's insufferable [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:37 PM Flag
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Lol [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 03:06 PM Flag
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Oh my, aren't you special. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 03:11 PM Flag
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Yes. It's terrible and inexcusable. I'm actually considering calling an attorney given what I've been experiencing so that I can preserve a record of what's been happening if I am let go or passed over for promotion. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:27 PM Flag
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I hate pregnant workers who use it as an excuse to be out sick all the time and screw the rest if us. Then promptly resign after 4 months mat leave so essentially we endured 12 months down 1 team member. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:19 PM Flag
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Most people don't do this. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:33 PM Flag
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I busted my butt during both pregnancies. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 03:16 PM Flag
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it's their right to take ML as benefit and then quit. you don't make the rules. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:43 PM Flag
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The poster may not make the rules but she or he may be hiring managers who have had this happen to them and then think twice next time... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 03:22 PM Flag
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I was demoted while on maternity leave [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:24 PM Flag
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i got promoted on my first pregnancy and fired on my second. neither had to do with the pregnancy. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:37 PM Flag
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I was treated really fairly. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 03:35 PM Flag
[ - ] The search feature on UB sucks. A few weeks ago someone posted a link to a cancer cluster study for LI (think it was done by SUNY Stony Brook). Anyone here have a link to that study or article? Thanks. 8 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:01 PM Flag
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If you just google LI cancer clusters, I'm sure you will find the study online [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 01:51 PM Flag
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Here's one: http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC151676/ [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 01:52 PM Flag
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oP: thanks, I did locate that one. I was wondering if there was one that is more recent (that one is from 2003). Maybe one that has county by county breakdown of cancer incidents, etc. I am researching towns in LI and I want to show someone that Bethpage has a higher incidence of clusters than other towns. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:12 PM Flag
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No, but if anyone reading this has a better way to search UB I would love to know. Have been looking for old posts and using keywords I knew I used and they don't appear. Random posts from 2011/2012 are just gone. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:09 PM Flag
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use google to search UB, put in Urban baby+ key words [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:13 PM Flag
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Won't work anymore. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:39 PM Flag
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I asked this question some time ago, and apparently the owners moved all the old posts to some sort of storage where they are no longer able to be read. So doing a google search or searching through the actual site doesn't matter - you can't get old posts anymore. Too bad because a lot of that information was interesting. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:39 PM Flag
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Is this the Brookhaven cluster? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:13 PM Flag
[ - ] Toddler (14 months) flaps his arms when excited. Is it normal bahavior or should I be concerned. Please help with advice. 3 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:00 PM Flag
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It is adorable. Enjoy. Please don't look for things to be wrong. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:02 PM Flag
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It's one sign of autism but you need the whole constellation of symptoms. Non-autistic children flap their arms too. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:18 PM Flag
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This [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:45 PM Flag
[ - ] Toddler (14 months) flaps his arms when excited. Is it normal bahavior or should I be concerned. Please help with advice. 1 Reply [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:00 PM Flag
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depends. could be normal, sensory or autistic. you need to look at other potential symptoms and behaviors. context matters. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:20 PM Flag
[ - ] Repost for day crowd: Thinking of moving into this duplex. It's on the 5th/6th floor. Worth it? Do you like it? http://streeteasy.com/building/101-warren-street-new_york/5b 7 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 01:58 PM Flag
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http://streeteasy.com/building/101-warren-street-new_york/5b [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 01:58 PM Flag
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love the condo hate the neighborhood [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:14 PM Flag
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it is spectacular. go for it. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:17 PM Flag
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$38,000 a month rent?! You NYCers are crazy. A half of a million dollars a year? How much money do you have to make a year to justify that? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:23 PM Flag
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38K a month rent? You crazy? Not in that area. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:25 PM Flag
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The price is a bit outrageous. I know someone in one of these. It is very nice, but not for 38k per month. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:28 PM Flag
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beautiful but for 38K a month it better be! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 03:53 PM Flag
[ - ] WWYD? Just found out a good friend is dating one of my ex-boyfriends. She didn't tell me about it - I heard it from a mutual friend. I am happily married now with DCs. Do I have any right to be upset that my friend didn't tell me she is dating him (I found out from another mutual friend)? I realize that he and I dated many years ago, and they are free adults, but she knows he is the "one who got away" (kind of) for me. TIA, I feel really childish asking but I thought there were some rules of girl friendship! 12 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 01:55 PM Flag
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What good what it have done? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:06 PM Flag
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I wouldn't be upset. You are married. She is not. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:07 PM Flag
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+1 She only didn't tell you because she knew you were going to be irrational. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 01:57 PM Flag
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Maybe a bit weird that she didn't tell you; but perhaps she wanted to wait and see if it actually turned into anything before bringing it up? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:08 PM Flag
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She probably didn't want to tell you, since there is a tinge of awkwardness about it, until she knew whether or not it was going to work out. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:09 PM Flag
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oh please, this isn't high school. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:10 PM Flag
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I would feel a bit hurt, but just move on from it. You are (presumably) happily married. I wouldn't bring it up either unless she tells me. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:00 PM Flag
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I guess you don't have a right to be upset, but it is only human. I have one ex who from my perspective is off limits for my girlfriends too. I would be very hurt if any girlfriend started dating him. He really hurt me, and I never want to see him again, and could not hang out with girlfriend if he became a part of the picture. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:14 PM Flag
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+1 [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:22 PM Flag
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This is awkward but you have to let it go. They're both single and time waits for no one. You can have a secret rendevous with him if that'll help you feel better. I'm sure he won't mind. He's a man. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:04 PM Flag
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No you do not have a right to be upset [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:46 PM Flag
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Grow up. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:36 PM Flag
[ - ] RHoNY finale highlight: LuAnn, insisting, "I would NEVER do anything like that! ... to you..." 22 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 01:49 PM Flag
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I missed the very end - what happened? Do you think Sonja and Harry are together now? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:05 PM Flag
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Were you able to watch the scene in which Sonja meets Harry at the restaurant? She tells him that she has x number of marriage years in her, so if he is still interested in Sonja after she is done with this phantom marriage to someone else, she will then date Harry again. I got the impression from watching Watch What Happens, that Sonja is not currently dating Harry. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 01:59 PM Flag
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TY [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:11 PM Flag
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YW. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:11 PM Flag
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no one ever invites me to parties where legs fly :( [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:07 PM Flag
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this show is so staged it is offensive to viewers, and I cannot believe how much money these people make on these shows!!!! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 01:57 PM Flag
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this is what i don't get - how can anyone whop ever "stars" on such a show not be embarrassed? I would't leave the house after it aired. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:09 PM Flag
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ITA, and their poor DCs [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:11 PM Flag
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there need to be laws that prevent parents from pimping out those kids for fame and financial gain. kids have a right to privacy but can't make those decisions and so those rights are being violated on the shows. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:05 PM Flag
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+1 [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 03:24 PM Flag
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ITA. It is humiliating. To everyone connected. Poor children. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:13 PM Flag
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Hahahaha! Me, neither. So unfair. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:12 PM Flag
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or: as a result, i have literally nothing to talk about, so i end up having to watch these idiotic shows so i can talk about something. anything. lol [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:25 PM Flag
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Me, too. This stupid show will somehow come up in conversation for me, too, when I am with people I am not really friends with. Discussing these shenanigans helps bond people who otherwise have nothing else in common. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:31 PM Flag
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I think Aviva really does have something on Carole regarding her book. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:11 PM Flag
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It does seem as if this is true!! What could it be? Carole's reaction and the way Aviva returns to it again and again really seems suspicious. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:14 PM Flag
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Maybe Carole doesn't write her books [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:29 PM Flag
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what makes you think that? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:22 PM Flag
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it was a beautiful pause. I can just imagine the arch of Sonja's brow. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:12 PM Flag
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Hahaha! It was indeed a "beautiful pause". Perfectly timed and delivered. The arch of Sonja's brow-- it should get its own spin-off. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:15 PM Flag
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OP: I do, however, think it was wickedly brilliant how Heather is launching "Bossy Pants" in her shape wear line. If she orchestrated the entire Kristin, rappelling, geocaching drama, in order to promote Bossy Pants, she is a marketing genius. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:20 PM Flag
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she is the smartest one of the bunch. and cool, too. holla! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:26 PM Flag
[ - ] I found out that 10 yo DS has been putting the dog collar on 8 yo DS and making him walk through the electric fence. 39 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 01:46 PM Flag
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No supervision? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 01:58 PM Flag
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We have a nanny but she spends the most time with our 5 yo and 2 yo. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 01:48 PM Flag
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you have too many kids [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 01:49 PM Flag
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too many kids, lady. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 01:49 PM Flag
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then you need a second sitter- like a high schooler to be with the older two if this is how they are treating each other. a two year old almost needs own sitter. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:07 PM Flag
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fake [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 01:48 PM Flag
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Not fake! They fight all the time but I didn't realize it had gotten this bad. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 01:49 PM Flag
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i posted below. honestly, you need to intervene FAST. i was so abused by my brother growing up- physically & emotionally. if i had known then what i know now i should have been removed from my house. my mom went back to work when i was nine. we were essentially latch key kids. i dreaded going home after school every day. that said, where is the nanny?!? fine that she is focusing on the younger kids, but she should sense that something bad is going on with the two older ones. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 01:52 PM Flag
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NP that is so sad :( I'm sorry to hear that about your brother. Are things okay now btwn you or have you cut off all contact? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:24 PM Flag
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lolz [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 01:49 PM Flag
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This is something my older brother would have made me do. he was, and still is, such a dick. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 01:50 PM Flag
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+1 [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:05 PM Flag
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Your eight year old did this twice? You need to replace the batteries in the dog collar. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:01 PM Flag
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Wow. How are you going to handle this? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 01:52 PM Flag
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They are at day camp now but I'm going to punish when he gets home. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 01:53 PM Flag
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how? by making him go to the electric fence too? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:05 PM Flag
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Great idea. And on all fours. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:09 PM Flag
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ha! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:11 PM Flag
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THIS. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:36 PM Flag
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So this! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:49 PM Flag
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Typical boys, they love to torture each other. I have two boys. I always ask them what they think their punishment should be for what they did, it's interesting to see what they come up with, sometime worse than what I would in the first place. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:13 PM Flag
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Gross with they "typical boy" shit. Can't stand boys [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:07 PM Flag
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np: I agree- it's not typical boy stuff. Don't excuse it as that. My boys would never do this to each other. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:22 PM Flag
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Yeah they would. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:36 PM Flag
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WTF w the I can't stand boys. You are terrible. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:29 PM Flag
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Any man who said he "can't stand girls" would be pilloried, and everyone knows it. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:33 PM Flag
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Of course, bc either way it's a horrible thing to say. I have 3 boys and the fact that there's some smug asshole out there who "can't stand boys" infuriates me. What kind of sociopath thinks like this!? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:40 PM Flag
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Indeed. If she can't stand boys, I wonder why she married one. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 03:02 PM Flag
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Oh please unclench. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:36 PM Flag
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great idea, OP should ask her 8yo what he wants done [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:18 PM Flag
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"typical boy"? please. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:19 PM Flag
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Made him wear a muzzle too? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:15 PM Flag
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A little funny but it should be dealt with appropriately. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:29 PM Flag
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NP Not funny to me at all [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:21 PM Flag
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It's pretty funny and totally normal for two boys. Boys are obsesed with electric shock. A bunch of my sons friends in college bought a taser and use it on eachother for "fun". [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:36 PM Flag
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^^but she needs to talk to the older kid. It has to stop. But its summer and they'll come up with something else...I bet the younger kid laughed his ass off. You don't have veal kids OP...that's something. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:37 PM Flag
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omg lolo [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:27 PM Flag
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OR - ITA. Like I said, it needs to be handled but it's not that bad. Hell, my nephew put the colar on himself and did this!! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:43 PM Flag
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Malcolm in the Middle [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:36 PM Flag
[ - ] I hate affirmative action. What happen to fairness? 53 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 01:46 PM Flag
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Bwahahaha [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 01:36 PM Flag
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What is fair? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 01:48 PM Flag
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Let the deserving ones have it regardless of color, race, gender, socioeconomic conditions, etc. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 01:38 PM Flag
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pp: But what is "deserving." Say you have a kid whose family pushes test prep for years and gets a 99 versus a kid whose family never looked twice at homework, etc and gets a 98. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:00 PM Flag
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It may seem unfair on the surface that a kid that gets a 99 gets in mainly because of the parents pushing, but it really is not. The kid get that gets 99 will probably get in and fail at some point in life if he/she doesn't learn to rely on himself/herself without the parents involvements. I have seen this happen all too many times. The ones that were able to attain some sort of academic success "all" due to the parents later all turn out to be good for nothing. The only way to sustain that success is that these kids need to put in their own efforts. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:05 PM Flag
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but isn't that socioeconomic conditions in a sense? those with the luck of parents with money for tutors, private schools, afterschool camps,etc. get the advantage over those without? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 03:04 PM Flag
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Like I said only to a certain point, then the advantage goes away if the kid can't pull his/her own way later in life. And the ones with socioeconomic disadvantages often possess the kind of focus and determination unparalleled. There are always two sides to a story. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 03:07 PM Flag
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but shouldn't the one with the socioeconomic disadvantage but who gets, in your example, the 98 be able to get into the program/school/whatever ? The economic advantage of the 99 gets outweighed with the focus/determination of the 98. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 03:09 PM Flag
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Yes. I believe so. I think life is a very long race. If we have a fair system, the deserving ones will ultimately triumph. The ones get there "purely" due to their parents' help will ultimate not achieve anything. The world is much more contained in the early years when money could give you a leg up. It's not so much so in a work place. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 03:13 PM Flag
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I'm glad you added gender, because people here often forget that affirmative action includes that. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:53 PM Flag
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Yes, I think it should be fair all the way. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:50 PM Flag
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Whether you are for or against AA, I don't know anyone who actually thinks life is fair. The birth lottery predetermines SO much of the rest of our lives. Not everything, for sure, because hard work, choices, etc. factor in, but do not pretend that AA is the thing getting in the way of this thing you call fairness. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 01:39 PM Flag
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I am not against AA. I am a minority myself. I don't believe that giving AA an academic break gives them a leg up in their future success if they are not deserving. Employers are not as forgiving. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 01:56 PM Flag
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AA was affirmative action in this case. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 01:58 PM Flag
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It impacts much more than AA. The space you give to AA takes away the space that could have been given to another truly qualified kid, who is ultimately treated unfairly. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:03 PM Flag
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How are you defining fair? Is it fair that a poor child gets a lower quality education? Is it fair the minority teens are followed around stores regardless of their ability to pay? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 01:40 PM Flag
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No, I am a minority myself. And I know first hand what it is like to be a minority with affirmative action. When you earned your way, people assume that you got there partly because of affirmative action. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 01:47 PM Flag
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Yes. It was so fair for everyone before affirmative action came along. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 01:41 PM Flag
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exactly. i want to back to the days when only white men were accepted at top schools. oh, wait... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 01:53 PM Flag
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Anti-affirmative action is not the same as pro-descrimination. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 01:48 PM Flag
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When you grow up you will learn that life isn't fair. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 01:53 PM Flag
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I actually think that for the most part, life is quite fair. The economically disadvantaged kids tend to possess the focus and determination that kids from more affluent families don't have. There are always 2 sides to every story. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:00 PM Flag
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You are incredibly naive or ignorant. Economically disadvantaged kids are thousands of times more likely to have health issues, wind up in jail, wind up in foster care, have mental health issues, etc. You need to learn that just being black does not give you the moral authority on this. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:00 PM Flag
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Unfortunately what you said about the issues are certainly true, but affirmative action is not the answer to those issues. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:16 PM Flag
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bait fail. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 01:47 PM Flag
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The fact that you are not AA is unfair. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 01:58 PM Flag
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Was it fair to keep people out of school and jobs because of the color of their skin even when they had good grades or were well qualified? You reap what you sew. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 01:49 PM Flag
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That is discrimination - nothing to do with affirmative action. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 01:51 PM Flag
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sow [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:03 PM Flag
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Isn't it what's happening to Asian kids in college admissions? They have to score more than 150 points in SAT, among other things, to get accepted compared to white kids. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:08 PM Flag
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Exactly. Unfair. Someone will ultimately get punished unfairly due to affirmative action. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:24 PM Flag
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ITA. I know of 2 people in my professional world who are practically inept and there is no question that affirmative action has kept them on a decent trajectory. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:00 PM Flag
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This is exactly what I mean. But at some point, they will fail. So affirmative action is doing them a hug dis-service. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:06 PM Flag
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I don't know about that. They are both pretty mild-mannered and not trouble-makers, qualities which seem to help them move about and even get promoted occasionally. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:08 PM Flag
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Well, then it seems fair: those are qualities needed in a work place. We don't want all capable assholes :0 [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:11 PM Flag
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govt employees? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:06 PM Flag
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Nope, employees of large corporations. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:08 PM Flag
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it is easy for incompetent employees all all races to get lost in the shuffle at a large corp. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:57 PM Flag
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That is a company that is not doing it right. Nobody is for that. It is about seeking out people who might not usually come to their attention, maybe giving some extra help to close a gap, but not accepting mediocrity or worse. You aren't against AA, you are agaisnt poor management, as we all should be! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:01 PM Flag
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Affirmative action is accepting mediocrity. These people would have never gotten the positions if not for affirmative action. OP wants to let the deserving ones be the chosen ones regardless of race, color, etc. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:07 PM Flag
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and gender. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:39 PM Flag
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Yes, and gender. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:56 PM Flag
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Getting rid of aa will not make the system fair. There are lots of people who get jobs based on connections. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 03:05 PM Flag
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The point is not to get rid of AA. While it is not deserving for someone unqualified to get a job based on connection, it does not make it right for someone unqualified to get a job or a school slot based on color, race, gender, socioeconomic condition, etc. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 03:11 PM Flag
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I'm sure these coworkers are children of the local sheriff, or police chief, or the nephew of the CEO or have some other high power connection. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:05 PM Flag
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I know many white guys who are the same, and their being white guys and part of the network is what prevents them from being fired as well. There will always be people who are treated differently because who they are (or who their parents are, what college they went do --regardless of whether they did well there). [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:56 PM Flag
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Eh, I know white guys like this too. They're usually someone's buddy. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:53 PM Flag
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zzzzzzzzzzzzzzz [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:05 PM Flag
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+1. There had been a lull on these types of posts, but the last day or so they've been coming back....somebody came back from vacation (or they just went on vacation so has time on their hands...) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:42 PM Flag
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You really should research the full history of privilege in USA (and abroad). When you learn about long term effects of apprenticeships offers, colleges acceptances, union memberships, grandfather clauses (to whatever), it may give you a different perspective on the mission of AA. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:33 PM Flag
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Can you shed some lights? The way to help underprivileged is to give access to programs like prep-for-prep to level the plane field, not to lower the admission standard for them. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:39 PM Flag
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http://ideas.time.com/2013/06/17/affirmative-action-has-helped-white-women-more-than-anyone/ [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:38 PM Flag
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I am not pro-discrimination. And affirmative action taken too far is discrimination against the ables by lowering the standards based for ones with certain conditions. No matter who it helps the most, white female or black male, it is just wrong. It is reverse discrimination. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 03:00 PM Flag
[ - ] db was found to be anemic at 1 year check up. Dr said its probably iron deficiency - had a pretty wicked gi bug a few weeks ago and was hardly eating or drinking anything. We are going for further testing today. Has this happened to anyone else? I'm finding all sorts of scary info on the internet about iron deficiency in infancy leading to long term complications 4 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 01:38 PM Flag
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Do not read about it on the internet. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 01:39 PM Flag
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+1. It can't help you now. Go love on your db. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:13 PM Flag
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+2 also I imagine that is for kids where they don't catch it, sounds like you caught it and your ped will work with you to get iron back in to yoru db's diet. GET OFF THE GOOGLE NOW [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:27 PM Flag
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Lots of my friends' kids took iron supplements at 1 yr, they're all fine healthy bright active kids now. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:37 PM Flag
[ - ] Has anyone else had their credit card numbers stolen for use on $100 Starbucks card and $10 at Zappos? This recently happened with 2 different credit cards. 15 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 01:37 PM Flag
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No. DH had his stollen recently and they bought ski equipment in Thousand Oaks, Ca. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 01:36 PM Flag
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Those thieves sound much more fun. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 01:42 PM Flag
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Sounds like trust fund kids. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 01:49 PM Flag
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No sorry this happened to you. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 01:37 PM Flag
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thank you [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:07 PM Flag
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I've had gas stations, TMobile, online retailers, and prepaid intl phone cards- you just catch it fast and you never pay any money. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:02 PM Flag
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No, but they did charge $400 at Macy's and $100 at a restaurant in Hoboken. And I live in Seattle. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 01:53 PM Flag
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yes, many times. someone stole my DH's CC number and went on a shopping spree at Target and adjacent fast food restaurants in Queens. They were smart and bought several $200 Target gift certificates and then probably used them right away so they wouldn't get cancelled. It was done with such a precision, I believe that the employee at Target was on it. And btw, the CC number was most likely stolen at a Starbucks on 23rd Street. When my DH went to pay for his coffee, the cashier claimed that card couldn't be swiped and that she has to take it to the backroom to input the data. 1 day later the Target shopping spree occurred. It was over $1800 total. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:14 PM Flag
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Oh jesus, that last part. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:06 PM Flag
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We had a credit card that we had only used for a total of about 10 times. Then we did not use it for about six months, and then there were some false charges. We do have a suspicion about which purchases were the ones where the number got leaked. I must say they were very patient, and if we had used it on a regular basis the next six months, we never would have suspected how far back it got stolen. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:21 PM Flag
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i have seen 2 approaches: the blitz-big$-attack and the random-small-infrequent-buy. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:31 PM Flag
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This isn't something anyone wants to hear, but really you shouldn't be paying at Starbucks with a credit card. Just use cash. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:24 PM Flag
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lol, we never use cash for anything. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:37 PM Flag
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Why not? When your cash gets stolen, your loss is limited to the amount of cash that they take. With credit cards, it can be a lot more. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:52 PM Flag
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We got a call from the credit card company, when somebody was in the airport trying to buy airline tickets. Unfortunately the credit card company was dumb about it. The thiefs got delayed long enough that the got scared and left and did not get caught. They should have just "sold" the tickets to them, verified and arrested them at the gate. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:22 PM Flag
[ - ] We tentatively decided on the name Brandon for DS2 but middle name is still up in the air. A few contenders: David (a family name, which I liked initially but am moving away from), Samuel (another family name, never a favorite but its OK), James (moving more toward this name lately but not set on it). Also very open to new ideas. If it matters, last name starts with S. TYIA 43 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 01:33 PM Flag
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Brandon James, Brandon Joseph [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 01:34 PM Flag
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Brandon Matthew [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 01:34 PM Flag
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OP: I do like this too but Matthew is a family member's name and not someone whose name I would want to use ;) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 01:44 PM Flag
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Brandon Thomas [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 01:35 PM Flag
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THIS [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 01:47 PM Flag
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Love Brandon James. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 01:45 PM Flag
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^^this [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 01:49 PM Flag
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don't let BJ happen as a nn though. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 01:54 PM Flag
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I would not!! [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 01:47 PM Flag
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+1 [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 01:54 PM Flag
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OP: Thanks! It is our current first choice but not 100% sure. Exploring our options right now :) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 01:44 PM Flag
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you cannot do this. the nickname is awful. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 01:50 PM Flag
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Would be awful for a girl but not a boy. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:10 PM Flag
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Brandon Christopher [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 01:35 PM Flag
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Brandon Patrick [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 01:36 PM Flag
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Brandon Louis [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 01:36 PM Flag
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Brandon Charles [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 01:36 PM Flag
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Brandon James [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 01:37 PM Flag
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- No - never BJ initiatials. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:16 PM Flag
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My DH has BJ initials and it has not scarred him for life. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:42 PM Flag
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I don't love Brandon. I actually like all of your middles better. James is my favorite but I'm worried about the S running into your last name (whether it's a first or a middle). Of the names you've listed, I would go with Samuel David S____. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 01:57 PM Flag
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She said she already decided on Brandon [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 01:47 PM Flag
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She said "tentatively" and she's still tossing the full name around. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:00 PM Flag
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^^^^ never mind, I see you don't like Samuel. How about Benjamin? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 01:48 PM Flag
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OP: Benjamin is another name on our list that is being considered for a first name. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 01:51 PM Flag
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OP: I def do not want to use Samuel as a first name. I dont really like the name to begin with, and we already have a pet named Sammy so that would be weird for all of us including DS2. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 01:48 PM Flag
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OP again. I also love the name James and its somewhat in consideration for a first name, DH likes it too, but I think it sounds funny with our last name and I hate hate hate the nicknames Jim, Jimmy, Jamie, etc. I know there isnt much control over your child's nicknames so I feel like a middle name would be a safer way to avoid that [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 01:50 PM Flag
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I like Brendan better than Brandon. Brendan is a classic Irish name. Brandon is a classic trailer park name. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 01:48 PM Flag
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+1 [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 01:50 PM Flag
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+1 [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:01 PM Flag
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love brendan [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:01 PM Flag
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Brendan Charles is nice [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:02 PM Flag
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+1 [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 01:54 PM Flag
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ITA. Also Brendan James, Brendan Thomas, Brendan Joseph [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 01:55 PM Flag
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My DH likes Brandon but thinks Brendan reminds him of a girls name/Brenda. I originally liked either version but I think DH POV may have poisoned Brendan for me. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 01:55 PM Flag
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What about Brian, Sean, Connor [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 01:56 PM Flag
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np-I don't think Brandon is trailer park. Plus, he'll be the only one in his class. There will be lots of Charles, James, Wills, Theodores, etc. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 01:57 PM Flag
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Brandon is totally a WT name [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 01:58 PM Flag
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+1, do not do it OP; Use David and come up with a nice nick name (but NOT Davey) [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:10 PM Flag
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I am sorry, but I loathe that name. James is beautifully classic [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:01 PM Flag
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Brandon James [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 01:54 PM Flag
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No one uses a middle name. Go with the one with family meaning. Brandan David. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 07.23.14, 02:14 PM Flag
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+100 middle names are totally useless in the real world; use one that honors your family because no one else will ever hear it [ Reply | More
]
General Topics 07.23.14, 02:36 PM Flag
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