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[ - ] What do you think about JDate? I'm not Jewish myself but find Jewish men very attractive. 3 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:13 AM Flag
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How old? I know a great Jewish man. Late 30's. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:15 AM Flag
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Late 30s too old. Look for 31-33. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:18 AM Flag
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This post seems to be showing up every other day. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:27 AM Flag
[ - ] My boobs sag. I'm 40. Is this common at my age? 1 Reply [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:13 AM Flag
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Yes. Especially if you breastfed [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 03:57 AM Flag
[ - ] How can you tell if a married man is into you- if you are married as well. 13 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:08 AM Flag
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He fingers you in the bleachers at baseball? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:09 AM Flag
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What happened? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:12 AM Flag
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More important question; ask yourself why you care? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:13 AM Flag
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He suggests you two wear each other's wedding rings. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:16 AM Flag
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He promised to be faithful to you [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:27 AM Flag
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Im blind to this, dont ask me. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:49 AM Flag
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Asks you to the prom [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 04:22 AM Flag
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I can't even tell when single men are into me. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 07:13 AM Flag
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Willing to dress up like Yoda during you-know-what. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 07:46 AM Flag
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Willing to dress up like Yoda during you-know-what. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 07:48 AM Flag
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Willing to dress up like Yoda during you-know-what. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 07:48 AM Flag
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Willing to dress up like Yoda during you-know-what. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 07:48 AM Flag
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listens to your theories about Seth Rich [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 07:55 AM Flag
[ - ] Stephanie 20 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:03 AM Flag
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is Lilly is Stephanie is Lilly [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:03 AM Flag
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Actually, Lilly is a Nom de Kink, and Stephanie is a fake name too, her name is Sophie [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:06 AM Flag
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Where does she live [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:07 AM Flag
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Columbus, Ohio [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 03:29 AM Flag
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You email with her? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 03:34 AM Flag
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I think she emails with pretty much everyone on UB at this point. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 03:39 AM Flag
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what is her story? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 03:40 AM Flag
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bored rich housewife who prefers talking to people on the internet over talking to real life people. maybe because of her past abuse or maybe because she's socially awkward [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 03:41 AM Flag
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What is her education [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:07 AM Flag
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PhD in Sociology [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 03:30 AM Flag
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from where? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 03:33 AM Flag
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I think an ivy, but I don't remember [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 03:33 AM Flag
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+1 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 03:27 AM Flag
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Is the person on who matched her email with Stephanie's blog? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:04 AM Flag
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Stephanie's email was never on Lilly's blog. It was a rumor started by an UBer who wanted to propagate the idea that the Stephanie person was Lilly. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 03:32 AM Flag
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It was on her blog. This is just a lie made by Stephanie to distract when she got caught. There have been MANY confirmed facts that point that Lilly = Stephanie [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 04:04 AM Flag
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Yet you never post any. We know you are lying [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 07:08 AM Flag
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You really think a Stanford student would be dumb enough to or her stand for some email in a blog talking about her abusive mother? And why would she turn around and invite said ahusive mother to her wedding then? Your story is falling apart. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 07:10 AM Flag
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Collapse [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:30 AM Flag
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you are obsessed. Just fuck her already. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 03:34 AM Flag
[ - ] Where should DH and I stay in Jackson Hole for 4ish days in late aug? 4 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:02 AM Flag
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Four Seasons [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:04 AM Flag
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+1 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:07 AM Flag
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Although it is in Teton Village. If you want in town, look elsewhere [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:10 AM Flag
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oh, good tip. Thanks. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:11 AM Flag
[ - ] Have you done toe stretching? I'm a yoga blogger and someone offered me a lot to advertise toe stretching but I'm not sure it's my thing. 1 Reply [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:01 AM Flag
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Yes, I do it. There are videos on you tube. I don't do yoga but I don't want to get bunions either. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:54 AM Flag
[ - ] How much do you think the president and VP should be paid. The salaries are too low for anyone worthwhile to run. Even comet was only making 170k. I would not take on a shit job like that for such low pay. Same with Sean and Kelly Anne. Those poor people. So sad. 9 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 01:56 AM Flag
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I think $170k is more than enough. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 01:59 AM Flag
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More than enough. And I think they should be impeached easily, mandate tax reveal, no incestuous daughters and a birdlike husband get an office in WH. In case any of this happens. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:10 AM Flag
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How can you live on 170k? Way too low for such a high stress job. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:11 AM Flag
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That's only the paycheck. Comp also includes all expenses paid, housing, food, travel, clothes, for entire family, plus security for life and guaranteed income for life. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 06:48 AM Flag
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Please. Save your sympathy for people who actually deserve it, like children raised in poverty with no idea when they'll get their next meal, veterans with missing limbs, and pediatric cancer patients, to name a few. Spicer and Conway made their beds and now have to sleep in them. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:11 AM Flag
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They both suck at their jobs. But if they were good, they'd deserve to be paid more. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:16 AM Flag
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After office you hit the big time. Obama's looking at $60mil now.... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:41 AM Flag
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For a 24/7 job like comey it should be more. the presidents makes lots of money after so it is fine. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 03:21 AM Flag
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Back in the day it was called 'serving your country' - I would think anyone would be honored to do it. I'm sure you can make up for it in paid appearances and consulting fees afterwards. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 07:45 AM Flag
[ - ] What's your goal weight? 5'3" 107 for me. 33 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 01:54 AM Flag
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That's a ridiculous goal. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 01:56 AM Flag
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Why is mine ridiculous? It was set by a doctor. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 01:57 AM Flag
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Do you still get your period at that weight? Mine ended for a year and a half when I got down to 110. Didn't come back until I gained 5 lb. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:01 AM Flag
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I've been on the pill for 15 years so I have a light short period. A few months ago I was 94 pounds so doctor put me on a diet to get up to 100+. First time I've weighed this much ever. Feels good to be healthy. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:07 AM Flag
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np i get my period at 110lbs at 5'8". I obviously have a thin frame and no curves. We're all different and what looks rail thin on my good friend of the same height is 130. No idea where the difference comes in. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 05:11 AM Flag
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My goal height is 6'8", which will be perfect for my weight. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 01:56 AM Flag
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Doctor DH? Tall men are sexy ;) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 01:57 AM Flag
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Nope, I'm a short woman. I've decided to change my height rather than my weight. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 01:59 AM Flag
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ily. I'm in the same boat. If I could just grow another 14 inches, I'd be in great shape! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 01:57 AM Flag
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Is there an app to help us get to our goal height? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:00 AM Flag
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They do stretching. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:01 AM Flag
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No more appetizers for you. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:01 AM Flag
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When I attach them to the top of my head they help me get closer to my goal. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:07 AM Flag
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There should be. We'd be rich, that's for sure. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:02 AM Flag
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Ily. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 01:58 AM Flag
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I wear heels for a reason. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:03 AM Flag
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What's the point of posting this? Everyone's bodies are different. For some, the ideal weight at your height could be 20lbs more. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 01:56 AM Flag
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I'm just curious. I finally hit my goal weight after 15 years and I'm proud. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 01:58 AM Flag
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Well that's great but the number is kind of meaningless to anyone here unless they are very close to your height and body composition. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 01:59 AM Flag
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Is this a sensitive topic for you? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:00 AM Flag
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Not at all. Just pointing out that it doesn't mean much for a bunch of anonymous posters to post their height and goal weight. It's meaningless without the whole picture. I'm honestly happy for you, congrats! :) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:02 AM Flag
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Does any UB conversation mean much though? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:07 AM Flag
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I'm 5'7" - I'd LOVE to be 120 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:01 AM Flag
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Same here, but I'm 220 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:07 AM Flag
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Too thin, no? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:07 AM Flag
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no, depends on the body. If I had boobs, probably thin, but I have a gisele frame unfortunately. Straight up and down. sucks bc if i gain weight i just look pregnant. There is no in between stick and pregnant... people wouldn't be so envious if they understood this [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 05:12 AM Flag
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5'5, goal is 120, now 125 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:02 AM Flag
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+1 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:15 AM Flag
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5'4" and 120. But I don't have the discipline for it. I'm 135 and look good dressed, but would look great at 120-ish. I was stuck in chubby phase for most of last year, so I'm happy enough at this weight. That's me in a nutshell - I exercise just enough and I pay attention to food just enough. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:15 AM Flag
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Im that, for 3mos before my wedding all i did was exercise and drink coffee. On my wedding day i was 117lbs. Id have to starve to get to that weight. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:20 AM Flag
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Now I see why I got hate. I was 5'3 94 and then got up to 107. I have tiny bone structure too though. My ring finger is a 3 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:29 AM Flag
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Nobody wants a bony ass or knobby knees naked. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:42 AM Flag
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This sounds like your anorexic or something, gain a few more lbs. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:51 AM Flag
[ - ] I know there are lots here who struggle with their weight so I just thought I'd post my experience: I have known for quite some time that my weight/eating issues were anchored in past trauma that caused me to overeat and to eat my emotions. I had dealt with the trauma but I never really did much with the eating for some reason. Well, a few months ago I decided to hire a therapist to see if I could make a breakthrough. Well... it worked. She helped me put a plan in place and more importantly, got me to work on the plan and make adjustments when it wasn't working, I don't really know how she did it but I am now in the driver's seat, I have lost 10 lbs and I AM FREAKING LOVING getting back into shape and getting these 30lbs I don't need OFF for good. The incredible thing is that my relationship with food has now changed. I no longer get the thrill I used to from food. It doesn't work any more. I take care of my emotions now and when I do... I don't eat. Of course I cheat or go back to my old ways from time to time, but the interesting thing there is when I do, food doesn't work any more to comfort me. I like food but if I eat too much, I don't feel good physically. So... I don't really do that that much any more. And the weight is falling off, 1-2lbs a week. I exercise too, of course. What feels so great is that I FINALLY feel like I am in control of food and that it has a normal place in my life. I hope reading this will help some of you. If it's emotional issues, you'll never lose the weight until you get to the bottom of that. Good luck to anyone else struggling with this and I hope these words can be of some help. I felt so good looking in the mirror today. I felt THIN for the first time in a long, long time and it felt so good. :) 6 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 01:53 AM Flag
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That's wonderful -- congrats and good on you!!! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:09 AM Flag
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TLDR [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:13 AM Flag
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Too bad for you then. Congrats, op. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:13 AM Flag
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+1 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:17 AM Flag
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Can you share the name of your therapist? I have had the same issues for many years. I cannot stop eating and I'm at my highest weight and very depressed. I have been to a couple therapist and they haven't been able to help. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 03:03 AM Flag
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op: Sorry just saw this, hope you're still on. Believe it or not, I used TalkSpace which was recommended to me here. At first I thought it wouldn't work. My therapist is actually quite a bit younger than me but... the way she approached weight loss completely worked for me. I was able for the first time to make the connections between emotion and food and then to break those unhealthy connections. Her first name is Erin and she is in CT, you can maybe search for her there. I hope very much that it works for you, good luck! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 03:12 AM Flag
[ - ] What is a really high end liquid hand soap ? I intend to give it as a housewarming gift to a friend is is very chic. Tia ! 24 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 01:53 AM Flag
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Joe Malone? And sabon? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 01:53 AM Flag
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Thanks. I forgot about these. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 01:56 AM Flag
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My cousin also likes philosophy. I enjoy their products when at he rhouse. I always say next time I'll splurge on nice soap for the guest bathroom but I know my kids would waste it all and make me cry. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 01:59 AM Flag
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Sabon. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:00 AM Flag
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Hermes [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:10 AM Flag
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The best is Colgate dishwashing liquid. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 01:56 AM Flag
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Dawn but you're right about the dishwashing liquid. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 01:59 AM Flag
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I like malin goetz [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:01 AM Flag
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+1 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:07 AM Flag
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Antica farmacista. I promise you need look no further than that. Better than all the options listed. Worlds better. . [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:11 AM Flag
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ILY! Someone gave me one of their body washes as a gift and DH tossed the empty bottle before I could make note of the name, but I recognize the label. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:24 AM Flag
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I hoarded when I saw this on clearance at TJ Maxx for $4/bottle ages ago. Still working my way through the stash. Love the Casablanca Lily scent. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:33 AM Flag
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lol. me too! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:46 AM Flag
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Wow that was a steal! Literally like 95% off! At least you know a good thing when you see it :) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 04:39 AM Flag
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:) great! I give it as gifts, as well as use it myself, and people love it! The scents are so beautiful, and they last a long, long time in the bathroom and on your skin. I like the floral scents myself. They smell so fresh and clean and youthful :) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 04:39 AM Flag
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In England, liquid hand soap is truly NOKD [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:22 AM Flag
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bar soap in every powder room? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:27 AM Flag
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Not true. Joe Malone. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:29 AM Flag
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So.true. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:33 AM Flag
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Is that why Molton Brown is so popular there? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:34 AM Flag
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In Italy, people only had liquid soap and I as longing for a nice bar of soap after a long day of sightseeing. I finally found a bar in a drugstore and paid three dollars for it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:35 AM Flag
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Aesop [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 04:11 AM Flag
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+1M [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 07:12 AM Flag
[ - ] I wanted whispering angel but it was 2x more than the other. I bought the other. Now I regret it. I'm also drinking alone. Eek 9 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 01:47 AM Flag
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booze? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 01:48 AM Flag
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Yes [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 01:49 AM Flag
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Whispering angel is striking me as over done and striver lately. Other options? Oh, and where do you love? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:01 AM Flag
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Well I'm visiting an elderly relative this weekend in Miami. My options with whispering angel, the French crap I bought and something called Charlie's. or pink moscato. Haha no way. I love summer in a bottle. I just wish I had splurged. $20 for a sure thing would have been better than the $10 gamble I failed on. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:09 AM Flag
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What was the other? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:06 AM Flag
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I got up to check for you. Belleruche. Don't buy it. It isn't horrible but it isn't delicious. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:12 AM Flag
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^as a sip more [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:12 AM Flag
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I find Whispering Angel pricey. MIP is good and less expensive. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:15 AM Flag
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There was one I bought last year at trader joe. It was in a pretty bottle and under $10. But I'm not in NYC this weekend. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:18 AM Flag
[ - ] Doctor DH here: is it totally out of bounds for me to say that I think maybe my problem is that I set too high a standard from the outset when we had kids? Our first kid was born when my wife was in residency, which meant that at 3 months old I had the kid on my own - all night, get up with him, feed him, change him, and then get him to the babysitter before I went to work. There were times when we didn't see her for a day and a half at a time. Then fellowship, where we moved 100 miles away from everyone we knew and I still handled it when she was gone from 8 to 4 every weekend. So now she just assumes that, well, it will all work out. I don't need to worry about home stuff. 29 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 01:47 AM Flag
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^^Just as an example: our younger kid is turning six. She will tell me "call XXX and book his party" and then two days later say "hey, did you book it yet?" [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 01:48 AM Flag
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Did you book it? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 01:50 AM Flag
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Of course I did. Just like I did the school meeting and the playdates. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:18 AM Flag
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Why don't you just be a SAHD? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:30 AM Flag
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You're not a doctor, right? Your the DH of a doctor. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 01:50 AM Flag
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You're doing what every WOHM does. No medals for you. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 01:51 AM Flag
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This [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:03 AM Flag
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This! I am poster below married to md who hs lived in 4 states in 7 yrs and we are moving again for dh career! 2 dcs. It is just part of the package [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:06 AM Flag
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^ that said, you need to communicate with her if she literally does nothing home related. Venting on ub isn't going to help, especially since you never get that much sympathy on here! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:08 AM Flag
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and you are OK with that? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:19 AM Flag
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It is the last move. Most steps along the way were not in his control (intern year one place, residency another, fellowship another, first job) It is annoying, but it would be unfair to make him never change jobs after his first one [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:21 AM Flag
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Very likely that a precedent was set up and now it seems that you judge her daily. I suggest you both read the book "How Not To Hate Your Husband After Children"--- it focuses a lot of different expectations and responsibilities and ideas on how to work it out. GL [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 01:52 AM Flag
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What's your income vs hers? Just curious. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 01:59 AM Flag
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80k me 250k her. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:20 AM Flag
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Hasn't it changed that she's not in residency/fellowship anymore? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:23 AM Flag
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Are you in NY or someehere else? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:31 AM Flag
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Sounds likely. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:00 AM Flag
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This is not an unusual dynamic. Doctors are used to the being the boss, they say and others do. Work is prepped for them, they do their thing and somebody else cleans up. This usually conveys to home life as well. At least she's doing the planning part, you can make the phonecall. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:03 AM Flag
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That's what I was thinking. If the roles were reversed the dr dh wouldn't be doing the planning either. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:08 AM Flag
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Yep [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:09 AM Flag
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Fair enough. But I also wouldn't be working and would be hanging around with the complaining SAHMs all day if the tables were turned. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:23 AM Flag
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I know of a few men who quit their jobs and managed their wife's practice and assumed the role most commonly associated with mom/wife. It's 2017. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:29 AM Flag
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You know that if Dr. wife were a man and you were a woman this would be expected right? Doctors have crazy hours. Maybe you should have thought about that. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:04 AM Flag
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this. still, I'd be pissed. you're not my boss. you don't get to give me orders and then circle back to see if they're done. pick up a phone. but, you did set a precedent. so now it's on you to make her aware of what you do and that you're unhappy with the arrangement. it worked for awhile and it doesn't work anymore. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:12 AM Flag
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I never could deal with the whether my bf was going to be late. Cooked dinner 3 + times, he ate it for breakfast and i said forget this [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:35 AM Flag
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OP: this is my life for 12 years. I cook dinner every night at 6:15. Sometimes she is home, sometimes she isn't. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 03:02 AM Flag
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I actually feel sorry for her. You should be grateful that she sacrifices so much - for your family's finances and for her patients. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 03:27 AM Flag
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^I just left a job white terrible hours - I hadn't been home at 6:15 pm in years. It's awful. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 03:31 AM Flag
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Yes. It is out of bounds to say that. Doesn't excuse one spouse leaving all the childcare to another (if that really is the case) but you have enabled this [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:28 AM Flag
[ - ] 12 year old dd refuses to wear anything but big, boxy t-shirts. thinks v-necks, sleeveless t-shirts, and round-neck t-shirts that are not touching her neck expose too much. any recommendations to curb the pickiness? need i be concerned about body issues? it has become a real problem for her to find clothes. i have taken her to dozens of stores and she rejects everything. tia. 10 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 01:39 AM Flag
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Yes. How does she feel about her weight? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 01:41 AM Flag
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fine. she is tall and lean. not sure what the issue is, and i can't get her to discuss anything. any suggestions? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 01:51 AM Flag
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Could be nothing. I had a few friends like this but they identified themselves as "tomboys". [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 01:54 AM Flag
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I was similar at that age. By 17, I was fine. But for five years I pretty much just wore sweatpants all the time. It was bc I was deeply self conscious and also uncomfortable with the idea of boys checking out my body. I was not overweight, though I did have some specific insecurities about my body. My total lack of style had a huge impact on my social life, unfortunately. I would have done much better at a school with uniforms, though I realize that isn't a particularly helpful remark in this instance. If I were you, I would have a conversation with her about it (try to understand where she is coming from and see if she mentions any particular insecurities) and then take her to a personal shopper. It might help her immensely to have access to modest and unrevealing clothing that is nevertheless fashionable (I know that it would have helped me!)-- things like maxi dresses, cute jackets and sweaters, nice shoes, etc. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 01:51 AM Flag
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thank you. i will try the personal shopper route, but hope i am not setting the personal shopper up for failure since dd is so quick to reject everything. what made you comfortable at 17? was it just that your development was complete by then? i am trying to get into dd's head, and am at a loss. when i ask direct questions about the nature of her discomfort or reassure her, she changes the subject. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:02 AM Flag
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First of all, please feel free to take my opinion with a grain of salt or disregard everything that I say. I have never met your daughter, and obviously you know her much better than I do (it would help if you could describe her personality a bit more, for that matter). I can only really speak to my own adolescent experience, which was pretty awful-- and potentially unrelated to what your child is going through. First of all, these things are not always tied to objective aspects of physical appearance. Your daughter could be physically perfect and still feel deeply insecure about her appearance and physicality (and I do think that a preference for loose and unfashionable clothing at that age is probably a sign of some sort of insecurity or discomfort with her own body). A lot of it is mental. Is she a perfectionist? Even if she doesn't want to talk, I would try to keep all lines of communication as open as possible. Encourage her to feel comfortable sharing her thoughts with you and provide unconditional love and support. Don't make her feel judged! In particular, ask her what kind of women she looks up to/aspires to be like. It is not a good sign if she says something that suggests that she believes that a woman's physical appearance defines her value. Is there anyone in her life who could be unintentionally conveying that message? Sorry to ask this, but are you and your husband still together? (My parents were divorced, and my wealthy father dated a string of much younger, sexualized bimbos with a lot of plastic surgery. It gave me a pretty warped idea about gender dynamics. I sincerely hope that this isn't something that your girl will have to deal with).... My development was certainly not complete by 17! I was still extremely immature. I hate to say this, but what changed in my particular case was that I started experimenting with drugs and alcohol. Not extensively, but more than my parents would have liked. For me, this was a positive and probably inevitable experience. It opened my mind to new points of view, so to speak, and helped me relax and abandon some of my previous insecurities. Obviously I'm not recommending this-- just telling you what it was like for me. In retrospect, I see that I was suffering from clinical depression during my early teenage years, though I didn't realize it at the time. Is it possible that your daughter is feeling blue? Unfortunately, kids in junior high and high school can be pretty unforgiving. The goal for some of them is to fit in as much as possible. Dressing differently from the norm can therefore be a risk-- which is why I am strongly suggesting that you involve a personal shopper who will be able to pick clothes that cover her body but still look stylish. She doesn't need to go to the stores herself if shopping feels too stressful (it did for me at the time). Just buy the clothes for her to try on at home and return the things that she rejects. May I ask what kind of school she attends? Is she under a lot of pressure? Does she have close friends? I went to an elite private school and was miserable. It was way too much pressure for me to handle, and I became anxiety-ridden and withdrawn. An alternative/artsy school (and/or, as I already mentioned, a school with uniforms) would have been a much better fit for me. Consider this when you help her pick a high school. I hope that some of this helped! Happy to elaborate further if you want me to. As others have said, this may just be a passing phase and nothing to worry about. In my case, though, it was a sign of deeper problems, which is why I have taken the time to write such a detailed response. Just remember that adolescence is very hard for some girls and always try to be sympathetic!! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 03:17 AM Flag
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Girls this age can be so funny. Is it possible she overheard / misunderstood something and is worried about appearing "slutty"? Or could she be self conscious about her bra showing ? 12 is a tough age and they get some crazy ideas. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 01:56 AM Flag
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she has seen her share of slutty clothing and thinks it's trashy, but she has gone overboard in her view of what is trashy. i took her to 12 stores last weekend and gave her full freedom to choose anything she liked. to no avail. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:09 AM Flag
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I was like that, I was tall and thin with big breasts and grown men would make comments, so I spent most of my teen years in oversized tees [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 03:36 AM Flag
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Is it possible she has been sexually abused? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 03:43 AM Flag
[ - ] We leave for Turkey in two weeks. It's a direct flight and we're traveling with a 2.5yo and a 7mt old. Any advice for the flight? 16 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 01:29 AM Flag
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Take a few activities for the 2.5yo. Stickers, tablet, load videos, paper, crayons etc. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 01:40 AM Flag
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Can't bring tablet back on the flight though? Has to be checked. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 01:44 AM Flag
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Yes. Back to US from Ataturk , you'll have to check it in. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 01:50 AM Flag
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iPod then. I suspend screen time rules during long flights. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 01:51 AM Flag
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Not from turkey [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:01 AM Flag
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Do you have family there? Why would you go there now? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 01:43 AM Flag
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Also wondering this! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:04 AM Flag
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I went years ago and it is beautiful but currently politically unstable and risk of terrorism there is much higher than other parts of Europe. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:10 AM Flag
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DH has family there. This is just the time when we could go. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:13 AM Flag
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Ok. As long as you know what you're doing. I know a lot of solo female travelers going. Dumb asses. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:17 AM Flag
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Pass out Benadryl and vodka shot bottles to all your neighbors. Maybe some chocolate too. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 01:47 AM Flag
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ha! thanks [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:13 AM Flag
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Buy a pack of ear plugs and give them out if the kids are crying. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:43 AM Flag
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I would never travel to the middle east witb kids that young. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:36 AM Flag
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Take tons of diapers and snacks on plane, you don't want to be stranded somewhere without enough diapers and food. Extra set of clothes for both of you. Have DCs well rested before the flight, contrary to common opinion, kids do much better when well rested. Pack lots of small toys and crafts for the toddler. If he is allowed screen time, now is he time to allow a lot of it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:42 AM Flag
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^^My DCs ears hurt a lot at landing, someone told us to suck on something. I usually make her suck on her thumb. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:43 AM Flag
[ - ] I'm so sick of the Pharma ads on TV, what a pill popping nation we are living in! 7 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 01:28 AM Flag
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Agreed. And they all seem like snl skits. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 01:31 AM Flag
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Totally. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 01:39 AM Flag
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x1,000 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:44 AM Flag
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The United States is one of the only countries in the world that allows TV ads for drugs. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 01:40 AM Flag
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Sudden and fatal bleeding is known to have occurred. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 01:40 AM Flag
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You have to say that really quickly for total effect. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 01:58 AM Flag
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NP-And while showing a happy image [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:57 AM Flag
[ - ] What should DS wear to a bar mitzvah service? Does he need a jacket or is a dress shirt and pants ok? Typically how long is a bar mitzvah service? 3 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 01:26 AM Flag
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Depends how religious they are. Service for friends so. Was almost 3 hours. We did blue dress shirt and black pants [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 01:34 AM Flag
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Suit and tie. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 02:24 AM Flag
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Definitely jacket. Can be navy jacket and khakis. Doesn't need to be suit. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.29.17, 03:07 AM Flag
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