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[ - ] Does anyone have an ADHD coach/tutor recommendation? NYC, 11 yr. old. 1 Reply [ Reply | Watch | More ]
New York City 10.16.18, 06:19 PM Flag
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Shuni Zerkyer is good at Executive Functioning. It helps with a lot of things but not the fidgeting and movement part. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 07:29 PM Flag
[ - ] I'm a 48 year old lawyer and I don't want to do this anymore. I don't know what I want to do though. I need to make about $140K a year. Where do I start looking for some other career? 13 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 06:14 PM Flag
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Eh, most of my lawyer friends who looked elsewhere couldn't find anything that paid 6 figures so they all ended up back in the law, but took less demanding legal jobs. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 06:16 PM Flag
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Big Law admin gigs. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 06:16 PM Flag
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That's what I thought. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 06:18 PM Flag
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What type of law do you practice? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 06:17 PM Flag
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Litigation - Antitrust. But I don't like it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 06:18 PM Flag
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I was a litigator. Went in-house at age 54 and really enjoy it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 06:26 PM Flag
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Hang out a shingle and do wills trusts estates etc [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 06:20 PM Flag
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Only one of my classmates still practices. Here's what some are doing: other corporate jobs that they got their foot in the door via law, so maybe they started off as an attorney but sidelined into an IT gig, that they then took remote. Some were self starters, one is doing real estate in Miami. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 06:22 PM Flag
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I'm a middle-aged lawyer, too. I would consider a different area of law, like maybe real estate closings or adoptions. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 06:25 PM Flag
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^^or politics, like working for a campaign or as a legislative staffer. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 06:28 PM Flag
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Ha. Like my teacher friends who want to quit. But only for a job that pays 6 figures with summers off and week long holidays throughout the rest of the year. Good luck with that. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 07:27 PM Flag
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Is it possible to take a bigger pay cut? It is rare to be able to make a lateral salary move while changing that much [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 07:30 PM Flag
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nanny [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 08:11 PM Flag
[ - ] About how many girls leave Spence/Chapin/Brearley after 8th grade for a coed school or boarding school? 7 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 06:09 PM Flag
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Eleven. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 06:13 PM Flag
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Lol, each school? Obviously it depends on the year. At Chapin one heavy year was 8 girls leaving. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 07:29 PM Flag
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9.83 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 07:39 PM Flag
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Varies from year to year. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 08:36 PM Flag
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6 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 08:37 PM Flag
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5 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 09:19 PM Flag
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Out of 50 girls, I'd say 10ish leave plus the class goes to 60 so they take about 20 new girls in 9th. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 09:33 PM Flag
[ - ] I have twins at different colleges and these calendar "reminders" just came across my laptop. One of them is using the reminder app and we share the cloud. His reminders: "Did you go to the Gym today? Do you have an excuse?", "Did you order lunch today? Remember to bring a sandwich instead" and "It's a weekday night, are you drinking? You are only hurting your own potential. Cut it out." This is fascinating to me because I don't know which of my kids this is. 5 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 06:06 PM Flag
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I need some of that. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 06:25 PM Flag
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love! you raised psychologically minded kids. Go mom! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 06:32 PM Flag
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Can't you see what email it's attached to? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 06:46 PM Flag
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No, I click the "reminders" icon and it just has the three scheduled items. It's titled "Bitch, To Do" at the top, lol. This makes me think of one more than the other, but I'm not sure. I think I'm just going to let the mystery be and see what else rolls in. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 08:18 PM Flag
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Maybe one of them is reminding the other one! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 08:47 PM Flag
[ - ] I moved a few thousand miles away from my hometown (a nice city, not the sticks) and I rarely talk about my relatives as I am so busy with work, family and other issues. I see them once a year in summer. I have noticed that my relatives seem to have nothing better to do than to talk bad things about me and my nuclear family behind my back. Why are they so obsessed with me? 15 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 06:02 PM Flag
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You can only talk about someone when they're not there. What types of things are they saying about you? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 06:09 PM Flag
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??? "I have noticed..." how, exactly, have you noticed this? Sad, fake post. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 06:12 PM Flag
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People need to think things through before they post. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 06:15 PM Flag
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Right? So, OP, help me out here. You moved roughly 3,000 miles away from your extended family and rarely talk to them because you are SO INCREDIBLY BUSY. You see them once a year. So, to whom are they constantly talking "bad things about you and your nuclear family" behind your back? How are you aware of it? Hometown friends call you up and interrupt your INCREDIBLY BUSY NUCLEAR FAMILY LIFE to tell you that Uncle Merle and Cousin Cotton were dissing you down at the coffee shop this morning? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 06:17 PM Flag
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They say crass things about me to my mother and my sister. My mother told me what they say about me. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 06:19 PM Flag
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^ I would never even think about such mean things, I only see them once a year and don’t have a close relationship. They make stuff up about me. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 06:20 PM Flag
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Your mother sounds like a peach. Instead of telling them to STFU, she tells you hurtful things people say about you. Lovely! I can see why you moved away. Why not block them all from your phone and social media and just disown the whole hometown crew? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 06:25 PM Flag
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Yes, I am very upset about my mother. She always says yes to everyone and everything. She has no spine to stand up for me and defend me and my DH. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 06:28 PM Flag
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^ I have one particularly vicious aunt and my sister gloats about how this vicious aunt who like no one else, is super nice to her... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 06:29 PM Flag
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You are really angry about this, aren’t you? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 06:19 PM Flag
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Fake posts make me angry, yes. Particularly the boring fake posts. Like this one. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 06:21 PM Flag
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What a psycho... please seek help. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 06:25 PM Flag
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Why do I need help? OP is the one paranoid that her family gossips about her. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 06:27 PM Flag
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My mother told me. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 06:17 PM Flag
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Sure. Your extended family back in your hometown gossips about you to your mother. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 06:19 PM Flag
[ - ] Normal for kid who will be two next month to recite the entire alphabet and count 1-20 in both English and Spanish? 10 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 06:01 PM Flag
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Yes [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 06:06 PM Flag
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It's normal for a fairly intelligent toddler. But remember, Alex & Simon's kid was reciting Twinkle Twinkle Little Star in Latin at the same age. They're toddler parlor tricks. There's no larger understanding of what he's reciting, it may as well be songs he's singing. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 06:07 PM Flag
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Yes. “They” say it’s a sign of intelligence to be able to identify the number of objects in a group. So if you put 10 Legos in front of a child that they can identify it is 10 Legos. But otherwise, like above poster mentioned, it is a parlor trick for a reasonably bright /verbal toddler. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 06:10 PM Flag
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Most gifted kids can do this around 23 months so right on schedule! But normal? No. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 06:10 PM Flag
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This sounds like my DS who is gifted. So, probably on intelligent side of normal at least. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 06:15 PM Flag
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Mine did but not in Spanish. At citywide school [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 06:31 PM Flag
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My first DC was able to do that and more (actually knew all the letters and what sounds they made) before he was 18 months. He is in second grade now and his teachers don't seem to think he is particularly bright. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 06:35 PM Flag
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Yes not all that unusual esp in NYC. My kid knew all the letters and numbers at that age too -- would sit on the bus and point to words and say every single letter. Could do same in anither language. My mom says at that age I could also do that, plus write them. Whatever. It doesn't matter all that much in the long run. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 06:36 PM Flag
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Mine did. He just memorized stuff. Is smart now at 11 but no genius or anything and was late to actually read. Older children tend to do this more too because you spend a lot of time talking and teaching them this stuff. My younger couldn't do any of this at 2 but knew the names of all the vegetables in the grocery store because I was too tired to teach him spanish and spent a lot of time dragging him around the grocery store. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 06:38 PM Flag
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Fair to say the child is bright--enjoy him/her and encourage curiosity! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 06:58 PM Flag
[ - ] Moderator is working overtime today. Deleting posts and accounts. What is the reasoning behind it? 21 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 05:53 PM Flag
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Because people are being assholes? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 05:56 PM Flag
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No different today than any other day. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 05:57 PM Flag
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+1 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 07:47 PM Flag
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Who the moderator or posters? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 05:58 PM Flag
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Posters, for sure. The moderator is just doing their job. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 06:01 PM Flag
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The mod is AWESOME [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 05:58 PM Flag
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Is it a he or she or non binary? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 05:59 PM Flag
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No one knows. It's like the Great and Powerful OZ. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 05:59 PM Flag
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I've always assumed it's a she, but I guess it could be any of those. Or, like someone else says, there are probably more than one moderator, and they could be different genders, different backgrounds, different whatevers. I like the idea of non-binary, actually. Neutral pronouns. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 06:03 PM Flag
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This board would be hell for a male to moderate. Can you imagine. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 06:08 PM Flag
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Whenever I show my dh a post he gets a little pale and says "I don't think I could stomach that site". [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 06:13 PM Flag
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I did that exactly once. Apparently at the time I did, there was a big obnoxious IQ post from racist mom, if anyone remembers her. I remember that person to whom I showed UB recoiling from me in horror wondering what kind of degenerates I hang out with online. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 06:24 PM Flag
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Why??? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 07:50 PM Flag
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Good. So tired of "Asian" this and "Asian" that, "high IQ" this and "low IQ" that. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 06:00 PM Flag
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Yup..and di blasio blah blah blah and open borders and all that nonsense. Let's stick to what we know: purses, bratty kids, cheating dhs, invasive mils, sah v woh, etc [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 06:06 PM Flag
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Yes, please and thank you. Let's stick to the family discussion stuff here. Isn't that what UrbanBaby is supposed to be about? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 06:08 PM Flag
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I love the cheating DHS and SAHM jokes. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 06:11 PM Flag
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Yes, but you're preaching to the choir. It's not "one of us" who comes here and posts political shite all day long [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 06:25 PM Flag
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There was some racist nut on yesterday. That's probably why. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 06:04 PM Flag
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Not just yesterday. They've been going bonkers on here all morning. I'm tired of it; glad to see the mod(s) cracking down! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 06:06 PM Flag
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Making Urban Baby Great Again [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 06:48 PM Flag
[ - ] I was following a post where somebody was crying over their account being banned (I presume they made a new one to make that post). Someone posted a comment claiming to be a moderator, asking for the person's banned username, and the OP responded with it. Two minutes later, the entire thread was gone. I bet that there's one thing that pisses off the moderator more than anything else, and that's if somebody claims to be the moderator and isn't. Wow, what balls someone has to do that! 10 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 05:51 PM Flag
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+1000. Don't do that. And don't fall for a trick like that, either. The moderator NEVER posts here. I think it's against the rules or something. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 05:55 PM Flag
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That’s not true. The moderator absolutely posted on a thread to me [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 08:57 PM Flag
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I'm that poster! Actually, my account seemed to be briefly restored (I event checked that my watched posts were there!) and I was writing a thank you to the moderator, but it didn't post. Then I was banned again and the moderator removed the handle I posted. UB MODERATOR: If you are here, please, please go back and restore my account. I was trying to thank you and say that I'll be more careful in the future. It's not my goal to troll or offend. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 05:56 PM Flag
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OP: Like I said, I saw where you responded to someone claiming to be a moderator (and even said you knew it was probably a trick). Even if the mod had decided to restore your account, the moderator wasn't going to leave it restored and functional, once you told the world your username. You pretty much FORCED her to close it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 06:00 PM Flag
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But my username isn't visible on the board and I didn't include my full email address. I'm so disappointed. I thought I'd been given a second chance! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 06:02 PM Flag
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You've got a new account now. That's your second chance. Don't screw it up! (-: [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 06:04 PM Flag
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+1 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 06:06 PM Flag
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Yeah, I guess. Just really bummed to lose my watched posts. I had some great stuff there and I really didn't think the post that got me banned was bad or racist (certainly nowhere near the kind of crap that trolls post on here every day). :( [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 06:09 PM Flag
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what did you do? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 09:05 PM Flag
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This new moderator is very very delicate. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 09:20 PM Flag
[ - ] Would you take your four month old baby to the doctor for congestion and a cough? I know he caught it from my 2 year old DD. But he's so congested that he sometimes starts choking on his mucus to the point of making vomiting noises. Probably normal, but I never experienced with my DD. 7 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 05:48 PM Flag
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yes. they may give meds, a nebulizer, or a decongestant. I always erred on the side of caution when DC were that little. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 05:49 PM Flag
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Echoing this response— no hArm in taking them in when they’re this little! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 05:52 PM Flag
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+1 and rarely take my older ones to the dr [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 05:53 PM Flag
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+1 just in case of RSV [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 05:58 PM Flag
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No [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 08:58 PM Flag
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Yes call the ped and ask to speak with nurse. they can tell you whether or not to come in. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 09:03 PM Flag
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Yes, yes and yes. Please do it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 09:20 PM Flag
[ - ] Which Westchester towns do richer manhattanites have country homes in? 11 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 05:43 PM Flag
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Bedford [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 05:45 PM Flag
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I think that is the only one. Maybe North Salem. But Bedford has riding trails. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 05:47 PM Flag
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So where are all the country estates? Duchess? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 05:57 PM Flag
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uhh, bedford [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 06:04 PM Flag
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in pockets of Duchess: Pawling, Millbrook, Stanfordville [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 06:04 PM Flag
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and Rhinebeck is nice too [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 06:06 PM Flag
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Bedford, Bedford Hills, North Salem, parts of Katonah/South Salem/Pound Ridge/Sleepy Hollow. But most of them are also from the area or have family roots in Westchester. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 06:03 PM Flag
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We have a place in North Salem, friends in Millbrook and Rhinebeck [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 06:33 PM Flag
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What a strange question. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 06:45 PM Flag
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They are houses there, not homes. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 06:55 PM Flag
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Pound Ridge [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 08:12 PM Flag
[ - ] Has anyone else had a phone interview conducted by a robot? I just applied for a job on indeed.com & within a few minutes got an email request from the employer with instructions for a phone interview. You click the link in the email, enter your phone #, and a robot calls you and asks a short series of trite questions such as "Tell us about your professional background" and "Describe a problem you encountered at work and how you solved it" -- phone interviews are awkward AF to begin with, and one where you're basically talking to an answering machine is awful. 17 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 05:41 PM Flag
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thanks for the laugh, oh my the world we live in today [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 05:49 PM Flag
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I hope this does not become commonplace. It was incredibly impersonal and in no way did I feel like I could have given an accurate view of myself as a candidate. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 05:51 PM Flag
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That is honestly terrifying. Terrifying!!!!! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 05:53 PM Flag
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I assume the robot uses my answers to create an algorithm and then it decides whether or not to recommend the employer continue talking to me. It's awful. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 05:57 PM Flag
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I would assume people review the tapes and decide whether or not to pass you along to the next level. I don't think AI is advanced enough to do video. It is just now learning images and audio, not together yet. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 06:20 PM Flag
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I act, and it's been like this for 12 years now. eg I get a side, I record myself in a webcam, and there's no human interaction [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 05:55 PM Flag
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Yeah, this was for an office manager gig so not quite the same thing. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 05:57 PM Flag
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But that is your job - to act in front of camera with no audience feedback. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 06:10 PM Flag
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That is not my job. My job isn't a monologue in a vacuum or a webcam girl. My job means working with humans - it's difficult enough reading a side without a human, but now to do it without a human there? No director, no audience, no casting agent, no peer actors, no one [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 06:18 PM Flag
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I think the more automated, the less discrimination [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 06:05 PM Flag
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I disagree. Most jobs involve a personal connection and you can't communicate that to a recording. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 06:13 PM Flag
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actor above - exactly. You can also adjust yourself, tailor your message, based on body language and feedback, which is a critical skill to have in most hires. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 06:20 PM Flag
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OP here...anyway, I hate phone interviews to begin with and this one was quick but painful -- hated it -- I am sure I will never get a call from a human based on how I think my answers must have sounded in the recording. I might go the backdoor route even though my application went through indeed...their website gives a ton of info about the principals; I think I might throw a hard copy old school paper resume & cover letter in the mail with a pitch to meet in person. Can't hurt, might help. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 06:24 PM Flag
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No don't do that! Don't scream you're Luddite. Practice in front of a mirror, on a webcam, etc. can't hurt? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 07:03 PM Flag
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I disagree: remember the episode of Lost in Space where Dr. Smith and Maj. West are being tried by an all-robot judge and jury? Will Robinson makes some clicks onto a punchcard - OK, it's dated - and BAM - jail!! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 08:05 PM Flag
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Very common these days [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 07:55 PM Flag
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Yeah, it was a video interview [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 07:54 PM Flag
[ - ] Feel depressed: yet another job rejection and this one after just a phone interview. I am so upset that I keep bombing interviews. Please advise me...should I hire a career coach, ask for feedback? Have been unemployed for 5 months:( Field: IT; Business Systems Analyst. 5 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 05:35 PM Flag
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What do you mean by bombing? Like, you are getting stumped on the questions or the positions just aren't a good fit? Also, have you looked at consulting jobs? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 05:44 PM Flag
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I can't imagine feedback would help you in any way. You have no idea what goes on behind the scenes. Has the job already been promised to someone but the company has to go through a charade of screening candidates for some legal reason? You'll never know. Are you simply applying for the wrong jobs? I mean, you're getting the interviews but then...? Maybe work with someone who will help you with interview skills; there are professional coaches for that specifically (a career coach is more for helping you find out what you want to be when you grow up, isn't it?) -- if you're sure your weakness is the interview, that can be fixed. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 05:45 PM Flag
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+1 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 08:04 PM Flag
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You can’t take job rejections personally. Ask for feedback and keep networking and stay upbeat [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 06:46 PM Flag
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And oh yes, watch YouTube videos on interview skills [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 06:47 PM Flag
[ - ] Making a Halloween scene for a school event. Is a body bag too scary for 8 yr. olds? 13 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 05:34 PM Flag
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Not sure they would know what it was, and if they did, probably yes too scary. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 05:38 PM Flag
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You would have to leave the end unzipped with a foot or bloody head hanging out. Then they'd know. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 05:41 PM Flag
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This. I'd stick with a coffin holding a skeleton or a vampire, not the aftermath of a murder. Go supernatural not gory. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 05:42 PM Flag
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That's not cool. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 05:43 PM Flag
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This is why I hate Halloween. That would be too scary for ME. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 05:44 PM Flag
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+ a million. I like cute Halloween things not this zombie, mass murderer, grotesque stuff. I have an orange glitter cat and a black bat paper garland (with matte glitter!). And a skeleton with a red bandanna. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 05:57 PM Flag
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same! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 06:06 PM Flag
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Body bag with DH in it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 05:44 PM Flag
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too morbid . I would keep it to basics. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 05:44 PM Flag
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Yes [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 06:17 PM Flag
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Yes. Gross and at a school? NO WAY. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 09:21 PM Flag
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Are you for real? You can’t be serious. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 09:30 PM Flag
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my kids are animals... they'd think it was awesome. But I would advise against it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 09:34 PM Flag
[ - ] Can anyone point me toward vegan baked goods recipes that are bakesale-worthy? Either specific recipes or a good book or website would work. Thanks. 9 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 05:31 PM Flag
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Look at Deliciously Ella or Helmsley sisters recipes. Also google bbc vegan recipes. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 05:39 PM Flag
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I like the cookbooks by Tanya Barnard and Sarah Kramer: How it all Vegan; The Garden of Vegan; and La Dolce Vegan. They are general cookbooks but have baked goods sections. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 05:39 PM Flag
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My son has severe dairy, egg, nut and soy allergies. I am honestly really good at this. I made up a few on my own recipes, but there are some I found online that are really good. I'll post links: [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 05:49 PM Flag
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Hmm.. the rest I must have made up because I can't find links to any of them. I wish I could quickly develop a website and post them! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 05:51 PM Flag
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OP: Bake sale is December 2. Get to it! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 05:53 PM Flag
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Honestly the applesauce cake is AMAZING. My friends who are not vegan or trying to avoid any ingredients asked for the recipe and make it often. Very simple, looks great, and tastes like a cinnabon. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 05:55 PM Flag
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OP: Thanks all, great leads. I appreciate it very much. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 05:53 PM Flag
[ - ] DH here, looking for advice please. My amazing DW (whom I love, admire and respect very much) is a slob, while I am very neat. Clothes/shoes dropped everywhere, towels, papers. Lights left on everywhere, bathroom countertop filled with everything from the cabinet. I always insist on cleaning the kitchen, vacuum-cleaning everywhere, cleaning toilets, doing laundry etc. (in addition to what the cleaning person does biweekly). I WOH and she SAH, which is not a problem at all (mutual decision) - she does a lion's share of kids' stuff, does it great and I am very grateful for that. I mean I am ok doing all the cleaning (I actually insist on that) but having to also put away all her clothes/shoes/towels makes me resentful. Our kids take after her and I have to also clean after all of them (sometimes succeeding in making them do some of that). How can I break this pattern and motivate her to keep some order in the house? Talking doesn't help - she says she knows it's not right but gets upset that I point out to her how bad and unfair it all is. Thanks. 25 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 05:24 PM Flag
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I could have written this exact post about DH. Been married 11 years, still trying to figure out how to teach him that putting something "away" does not mean "drop on the floor exactly where you are standing". I have yet to change him, and have given up. either I pick up after my entire family, or I live in a shithole. I choose the former. I completely understand your resentment. PS why are you on this board? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 05:27 PM Flag
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Things! You can’t change people. Just got you react. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 05:49 PM Flag
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I am a parent (and DH) so parenting (and marriage-related) discussions are helpful, especially women's perspectives. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 05:52 PM Flag
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I told dh either he cleans or he pays+ arranges everything for a housecleaner (including purchasing supplies, waiting to open the door, etc). [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 05:59 PM Flag
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this is my husband too. I live in a cluttered place (I do just enough so it's not gross), because I'm just not going to follow after him picking things up. I'm not the damn maid. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 06:09 PM Flag
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does she know that it makes you resentful or do you hide it? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 05:28 PM Flag
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I let her know (sparingly) but usually it's just easier to take care of it myself and move on. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 05:51 PM Flag
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Can you afford more cleaning help? If you're willing to do the surfaces (vaccuum, etc.) your money might be better spent on someone one hour a day just before you're due home. There's a service called Something Fairy or Fairy NYC or such that specializes in that -- the same cleaner every day just to tidy up. Or if you live in an apartment building, put a sign in the laundry room -- someone else's cleaner might want to pick up an extra hour of pay. Good luck -- must be stressful. I can't go to sleep if everything isn't in place, so I feel your pain. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 05:29 PM Flag
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smh [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 05:31 PM Flag
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np At what? Slobs? One hour cleaning services? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 05:40 PM Flag
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we already have cleaning help during the day but the end of the day and weekends are on me - cannot imagine having anyone come on weekends. I leave what I can for Monday but a lot of stuff I cannot put off and just do [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 05:54 PM Flag
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I could not love someone who is a slob. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 05:33 PM Flag
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+1 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 05:54 PM Flag
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she is great in almost any other respect [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 05:54 PM Flag
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Maybe she's tired. Can you afford cleaning person? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 05:37 PM Flag
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replied already [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 05:55 PM Flag
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This is my dh. I suspect he has ADHD. Incapable of remembering to completly finish a task. I am the sahm in a large house and resent him for all the extra work. I gave up on him (raised by a slob hoarder) but you SHOULD NOT tolerate the behavior from your kids. I leave bins by the stairs so at the end of the day kids must put all their craps in their own bins and carry them to their room. Same goes for their laundry. I don't want to raise dc who are slobs. That is a character flaw in my book. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 05:40 PM Flag
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This is so exactly my situation that I am wondering if this is my own DH writing the post ...James ?...anyways, I cant explain what it is. Its super impossible for me to pick up. I just hate doing it. It bothers me as much as you, and I am the culprit. Even though I feel such calm when it looks neat. Hoping that your wife does reach a breaking point - mine is usually Saturday mornings, I kick everyone out and ask for 2 hours for pick up ( not cleaning - pick up is different from cleaning) . Then I can go out and enjoy a peaceful weekend with the family. Maybe you can offer that ...take DC's out for a while on the weekend and let her have that time to try to arrange -- or since you are so helpful , make it a game that the whole family does for one hour and then go out for a celebration lunch ... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 05:41 PM Flag
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DW, you got me... just kidding. My DW told me pretty much the same. And I am very involved with kids and sometimes take all of them out. Yes, once every other week it allows her to tackle the issue but it never lasts... :( [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 05:58 PM Flag
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Sounds like she is a dirty girl that grew up with full -time housekeeper. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 05:44 PM Flag
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Read Kevin Leman. Apply natural consequences. Also, FWIW, I find the less you own, the easier it is. If there is only one pair of scissors in the entire home, and 4 pairs of socks per person, and one towel per person, people seem to be able to manage DIY better. When it's too much, it's overwhelming like the OR wrote above, and so they don't even know where to start or why bother. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 05:51 PM Flag
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agreed - thanks [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 06:20 PM Flag
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I am you with a DD that is like this -- however, I just take all her things around the house, place it in a basket and put it in her room and close the door. She is interestingly a germaphobe but god, the messiest. There's nothing I can do. I've given up. My DH is similar to a lesser extent and it's a bone of contention. While not the cause of it, we are divorcing and I have to say, so glad to not pick after him and clean the kitchen, again and again because he comes in for ONE thing and leaves a disaster behind. You sound like a great DH and maybe you can get a room to yourself where they don't mess up? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 05:54 PM Flag
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thanks and very sorry about your divorce - hope everything works out for the best. we are in NYC so no hope for "my room" - I just have mess-free islands around my closets, bathroom sink etc... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 06:06 PM Flag
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its called ADHD and I am totally like this [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 07:24 PM Flag
[ - ] DH and his brother are great guys. Humble, funny, smart, don't want attention or stuff. Their sister is nothing like them. Vapid, mean, whines a lot - how are these people related? 9 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 05:19 PM Flag
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Siblings are individuals. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 05:21 PM Flag
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+1 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 06:07 PM Flag
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this [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 08:07 PM Flag
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I'm nothing like my sister (or brother) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 05:22 PM Flag
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+1 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 06:14 PM Flag
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It happens. My sister is a religious fundamentalist and I'm agnostic. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 05:23 PM Flag
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I don't know. My ex DH (long islander) is an accent-free, conservatively dressed regular guy...his brother is a track suit and pinky ring wearing Irish mob wanna be and his sister is a Fran Drescher clone. Parents are relatively regular if not my cup of tea. They're all related and were all raised the same, went to same schools, etc. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 05:26 PM Flag
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That’s like the opposite of my family - everyone was normal, educated, cultured but my sister seems to think of herself as a working class person, everyone is richer than our family (not true), she acquired a weird accent, dresses in cheapest H&M polyester, with crazy prints. I think it’s very weird. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 05:59 PM Flag
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Same in DH's family -- two wonderful business men/family men and one completely dysfunctional wreck living on fraudulently obtained disability. No idea how it happened. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 05:30 PM Flag
[ - ] Does anyone have a super-controlling DH? Mine is controlling from everything from what I wear to when and where we have sex. I've been married for 1 year but if this doesn't change I'm going to leave. Does counseling help? 21 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 05:18 PM Flag
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You didn't realize this before you got married? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 05:24 PM Flag
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I saw signs but ignored them. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 05:33 PM Flag
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Get out now. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 07:35 PM Flag
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+1 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 08:10 PM Flag
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I doubt it's going to change on its own. Maybe counseling will do some good, but take care of yourself because your post definitely has some read flags. I hope things work out for you. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 05:24 PM Flag
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No. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 07:35 PM Flag
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Many men refuse counseling, especially men like this. You are lucky that you've identified the problem early on. Set yourself a deadline for the decision and DO NOT GET PREGNANT. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 05:24 PM Flag
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You already know the answer to this. Very sorry you are in this situation. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 05:25 PM Flag
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Is this new post marriage? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 05:28 PM Flag
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What do you mean? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 05:30 PM Flag
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She means, you knew this about him & married him anyway. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 05:45 PM Flag
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It wasn't obvious because this started out as a long distance thing to where we were living together and both traveling a lot. By the time I saw real red flags we were already engaged and I'm 37. I didn't want to start over. A mistake in hindsight but here I am. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 06:16 PM Flag
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This is what you get for marrying Christian Grey. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 05:51 PM Flag
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No, NOTHING helps. Trust me, please. Follow the other poster's advice -- DO NOT GET PREGNANT. Leave as soon as you can. This behavior will turn into physical and verbal abuse. I am divorcing my DH of 15 years -- same behavior and it just got worse and worse and I kept lying to myself. Good luck! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 05:56 PM Flag
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Follow this advice and save yourself a life of grief. Start over fresh. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 06:19 PM Flag
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+1 a million. It will only get worse....exponentially if you bring a baby into the world. Get out. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 07:27 PM Flag
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+1 a million. It will only get worse....exponentially if you bring a baby into the world. Get out. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 07:27 PM Flag
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It will HELP YOU, to identify this as what it is, which is emotional abuse, but counseling will NOT HELP HIM. BTDT. DO NOT HAVE KIDS BEFORE YOU FIGURE THIS OUT AND LEAVE!! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 06:22 PM Flag
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Sounds like a narcissist. Get out now. I have a friend who was with a guy like this for years. Things only got worse. She finally got away after a bitter divorce and custody battle. She remarried, but the guy has not been able maintain a relationship with anyone since. Every woman has ended up running for the hills. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 06:37 PM Flag
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No, counseling will not help [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 07:35 PM Flag
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RUN. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 08:10 PM Flag
[ - ] Have any of you eaten at the Indian restaurant Vatan? Fun or cheesy? How was the food? 11 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 05:09 PM Flag
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The food was good. I'm not sure what you mean by cheesy, it was basically like a normal restaurant. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 05:10 PM Flag
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Several times. It was fun. Food was good. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 05:12 PM Flag
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OK thanks. Someone said it was like Epcot's interpretation of a country. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 05:18 PM Flag
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Just go and have some fun. I like it because it's vegetarian. It's also Kosher. To hell with the snobs. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 05:20 PM Flag
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I will have fun! Not a snob at all. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 06:27 PM Flag
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Yes, but the decor is not there for stupid fat American tourists. It’s there for people from Gujarat. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 05:39 PM Flag
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I liked it. Food is good. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 05:18 PM Flag
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I adore this place. It’s not cheesy. Bring an appetite. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 05:38 PM Flag
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I’ve never been but my friend who is from India recommended it to me, so it must be good and not inauthentic. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 05:40 PM Flag
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Vegetarian place? I think I ate there; no strong desire to go back. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 06:09 PM Flag
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Yes [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 10.16.18, 06:27 PM Flag
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