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[ - ] What would you do in this situation? I'm a 20 something girl married to a slightly older man. He has money and his mother, who only has a secondary level education, believes this entitles her to certain controls over me. She is very old fashioned and believes that women should do ALL of the housework (or hire somebody to do it). She attempts to dictate my every move and criticized everything I do, saying I'm not worthy to be the wife of "(her son's title)". My husband has a very filial relationship with her and wants to bring her into the home as his father has passed. I told him I would divorce him before that happened. 24 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:07 PM Flag
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Stay strong, Sister. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:08 PM Flag
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Also, she is very suspicious of 'the help', also. When my daughter was born I had somebody come in and she fired her without consulting me. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:56 PM Flag
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I assume she didn't hire her so if she took the authority to fire her this only would've happened if you and dh allowed it. So- is mil crazy and dh won't say anything to her or is OP incompetent and dh is letting mil at bad cop? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:13 PM Flag
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Is your mother in law from another country? Is that why she believes in "the old ways"? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:09 PM Flag
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Yes! She is Eastern European, but she came to America when she was young. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:00 PM Flag
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DO NOT let that happen! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:09 PM Flag
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I think you f-d yourself marrying what you call "a slightly older man." An older man generally expects a traditional marriage, the kind his parents had, and sees no reason to question his mom's behavior. Her mother in law probably did the same. It doesn't sound like your husband sees your point of view or will support you in changing this dynamic with his mother. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:57 PM Flag
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He's 36... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:01 PM Flag
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Ok. Well as illustrated in this thread it's a cultural difference. So - between your age discrepancy and cultural differences this is a challenge. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:32 PM Flag
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You married the man! If it is the relationship it sounds like, he is going to choose her over you. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:10 PM Flag
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Then she can dump him. Divorce exists for this reason. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:13 PM Flag
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Not if she wants his money. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:10 PM Flag
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How much money are we talking about? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:58 PM Flag
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this [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:13 PM Flag
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Enough that, even with our pre-nup, I will have enough to live off of (for fifteen years at an umc standard of living) if I left him. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:03 PM Flag
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Then I would do that. You don't want to raise your daughter thinking this is okay. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:20 PM Flag
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Awesome, next question... How old is the bitch and is she health? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:20 PM Flag
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You are correct. Your marriage would end anyway if she moves in. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:12 PM Flag
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Your husband is supposed to draw the line here and make the relationship between he two of you primary. He is enabling his Mom to do this. He needs to step up and defend you or else this will not work out. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:14 PM Flag
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I don't get what her education level has to do with things, but it kind of makes you sound like an arrogant ass when you mention it like that. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:17 PM Flag
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I can;t imagine my MIL living with me. But since DH is an only child, and if FIL ever passed away I can see this becoming a reality. I think the only thing is to set clear boundaries and be firm. This is YOUR house, YOUR family. your MIL is a guest in your marriage. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:13 PM Flag
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If my MIL were alive and she needed me I would allow her to live with us. I loved here. But I despise bullies.. especially loud mouthed bullies. So, your mother in law would have very little say in my household and, until she learned how to conduct herself, her behavior wouldn't be tolerated. You're the head of your household. The "old ways" are over. Let your husband know. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:39 PM Flag
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I have to be honest. I work in a hospital and the eastern european families who come in are so high strung@! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:40 PM Flag
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Tell him to buy an apt for the mil with your name and his name on the title (or just your name). She can live there, then when she dies, the apt will continue to be in your name and your husbands name. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:43 PM Flag
[ - ] HCHS posted cut-offs for 2015. 357 Math, 346 ELA. Pretty low. I'd expect scores significantly higher than last year, they seem almost the same. DD qualified, but it seems that there will be a lot more kids qualifying than last year year since the results are better than in 2013. Not sure whether to even bother with DD. Girls have much harder time than boys getting in anyway. 7 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
NY Schools 09.16.14, 08:06 PM Flag
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Just checked - it's the lowest 4 for ELA and close to the lowest 4 for math. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:06 PM Flag
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np: In past years, it has been a high 3 for ELA! Also, to OP - In my neighborhood, far more girls than boys get in, although citywide perhaps it is different. Girls are definitely better writers and the essay is the deciding factor, not the exam. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:15 PM Flag
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nnp: I heard the same thing about the essay being the deciding factor [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:31 PM Flag
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How many kids typically test? How many spots do they have? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:27 PM Flag
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2500-ish test for 150-ish spots. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:28 PM Flag
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Thanks for posting. Ds scored high enough. Guess we'll give it a try. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:29 PM Flag
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I figure it couldn't hurt to just take the test. I wouldn't spend time prepping unless I thought it would be a super fit for dc. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:33 PM Flag
[ - ] I need a new online place to talk to people. My child is grown and has gone off to college. I'll be nearing retirement soon. Any recommendations? 8 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:03 PM Flag
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meh stay here- it takes all kinds [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:13 PM Flag
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this. we could use your input. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:20 PM Flag
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we hardly talk about children here anyway. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:19 PM Flag
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Mine are college and beyond, too. We have a thing or two to teach the younger ones. And they sure are always schooling me. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:21 PM Flag
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Write UB to ask them to create a sub category space for mature moms [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:45 PM Flag
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Nah. I like you guys. Plus, I'd rather UB spend the time on the spammers. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:50 PM Flag
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I have older kids, too. But I always learn new stuff here! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:37 PM Flag
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Create a UB Post Graduate message board. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 09:26 PM Flag
[ - ] I posted a while ago about overhearing my sister and her husband arguing about him cheating on her. As everything has unraveled, she has found texts between him and a friend (that she knows) talking about how the friend was going out with his secretary (he has a pregnant gf, fyi) and how she had a friend she could "hook him up with". He didn't just find somebody he liked and fall into it, he is actively pursuing other women. So gross. 9 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:56 PM Flag
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I'm sorry. I just found out my husband is cheating on me and it has been devastating, stick by her. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:57 PM Flag
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you were trapped downstairs and they were talking about him texting other women? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:57 PM Flag
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Yes! That's me. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:57 PM Flag
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I remember that post. So sorry for your sister. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:47 PM Flag
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Please tell me she's not the breadwinner supporting his unemployed ass while he doesn't help around the house. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:07 PM Flag
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What an unbelievable douche. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:59 PM Flag
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This is the douchiest of the douches. Reminds me of Ray Liotta in Goodfellas. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:21 PM Flag
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That's sooo Jersey. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:28 PM Flag
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I hate men. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:46 PM Flag
[ - ] After screaming 4+ hours a day her first 6 months, db is finally doing better (thanks to learning to sit) and on a great sleep schedule. But, she still cries for 15 mins before each nap and bedtime. Any suggestions? Or just accept it? We have a great bedtime routine already in place from our 2 year old. 4 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:55 PM Flag
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Its not great if your kid has to cry herself to sleep every night [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:19 PM Flag
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Well if we hold her, rock her, etc. she'll just cry for hours instead. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 09:10 PM Flag
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One of mine was like this and cried whether we held him or not, so we just accepted it and stuck to the bed time routine. Some kids just have trouble with the sleep to wake transition (he would cry upon waking too). Eventually he grew out of it (now 6 yo). [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:28 PM Flag
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Thanks, that's reassuring [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 09:10 PM Flag
[ - ] I like to watch cooking shows but I hate to cook. 10 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:55 PM Flag
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Me too. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:09 PM Flag
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Funny. I love to cook but hate cooking shows [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:05 PM Flag
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+1 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:11 PM Flag
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me too [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:30 PM Flag
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Earlier, there were a bunch of women who were writing about how they cook because they want to cook, not because they have to. I was surprised. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:08 PM Flag
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You weren't aware of people who enjoy cooking prior to this? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:20 PM Flag
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they make me so freaking hungry [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:21 PM Flag
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How is it that Pioneer Woman doesn't weight 300 pounds!? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:25 PM Flag
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Because you can eat things in moderation...even carbs, oh my GOD....lead an active life, and be healthy. I know this is shocking news. But it's true. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:45 PM Flag
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Love her! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:34 PM Flag
[ - ] Aaaagh. I can't help myself--I'm always eating the kids' snacks. Hate myself for it. 4 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:54 PM Flag
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You're hungry. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:08 PM Flag
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np: not necessarily. If i have crackers in front of me (thanks to the kids), its very likely that I am going to eat them [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:12 PM Flag
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It's not a moral failing. If you're hungry, eat. What makes kids' snacks different than adults' snacks, anyway? Just buy real food that everyone can eat without angst. if it makes you feel that crappy to eat it, shouldn't you feel worse when you feed it to them? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:24 PM Flag
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I can relate to you…sometimes I eat the whole box of Animal Crackers watching TV. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 09:14 PM Flag
[ - ] Hair appointment today. Thinking about chopping it all off. Any ladies rocking a short haircut? 19 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:52 PM Flag
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What does DH say? Men hate short hair. The rest of us will just be jealous that it's so easy to take care of. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:08 PM Flag
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DH is 100% against the idea. I am mixed race so I think I can pull it off. DH thinks it will make me look "ethnic". I keep telling him the cat is out the bag with my brown skin. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:10 PM Flag
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I wouldn't do it if DH is going to hate it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:15 PM Flag
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OP: I spend half my time wondering if my DH got his haircut in the dark. It's hair and it will grow out. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:06 PM Flag
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Ok, do your thing. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:24 PM Flag
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This is really funny! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:34 PM Flag
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Wtf? Isn't that quite an insult? I.e., I accept your mixed status as long as you don't look it? What if your kids turned out "ethnic?" [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:38 PM Flag
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Ha, what's wrong with ethnic? Is dh white? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:40 PM Flag
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That's what I normally do. Grow it out a bit and then chop it off. If you can carry it off, go for a pixie cut [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:11 PM Flag
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OP: Loving the pixie cuts I have seen online. Of course I need to stop thinking I'm going to look like Halle Berry! I had short hair in college so I have a vague idea of what I look like. Just need the courage. Have long hair at the moment but sick of it and want to go back natural. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:16 PM Flag
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The shape of your face is important. Oval is ideal. too round won't work [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:13 PM Flag
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That's what I normally do. Grow it out a bit and then chop it off. If you can carry it off, go for a pixie cut [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:11 PM Flag
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i have since i was a teenager, my face is way too small for a lot of hair [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:00 PM Flag
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Don't do it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:15 PM Flag
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The coolest women always have short hair. It's easy to hide behind long hair, and you end up looking like everyone else. Go for it! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:17 PM Flag
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I agree with this. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:22 PM Flag
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this is true, but they are also usually very cute or beautiful. only good faces can pull off short hair [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:31 PM Flag
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nah, not necessarily. It certainly helps if you have style though. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:50 PM Flag
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I've had short hair most of my adult life - my hair is not cute long and not worth the effort I have to put into upkeep. If you are going to go short short and get a pixie, just know they are a total PITA to grow out. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:32 PM Flag
[ - ] To cancel or not to cancel? Play date set for 330. It's now 4pm and she texts me that shes at Kinkos and will be here soon. She's not usually disorganized and late so it makes me wonder if this is a lack of respect. Not close friends. More acquaintances. Thoughts? 17 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:47 PM Flag
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why cancel if you have nothing else to do for the next hr? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:01 PM Flag
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OP: bc 1) I need to get the kids in bed by 630 and have not bathed them and fed them. 2) it's RUDE! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:02 PM Flag
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well if 430p was really your deadline to end it, then cancel [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:04 PM Flag
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If the playdate was from 330-5, just still end it at 5 and say sorry we couldn't spend more time together, but it was nice to see you guys! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:05 PM Flag
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If your kid needs to be in bed by 630, he is probably young enough to where having a friend over to play is more for your socialization, not his. That being said, yes your friend is rude. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:05 PM Flag
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If I had to get my kids bathed fed and in bed by 630 I wouldn't have scheduled a 330 pd in the first place. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:06 PM Flag
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You put your kids to bed at SIX THIRTY?! Dear lord. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:35 PM Flag
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Cancel if you have conflicts later. But if this is the first time, cut a mom some slack. And hint: don't take everything so personally. Shit happens. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:52 PM Flag
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+ 1 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:53 PM Flag
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+2 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:54 PM Flag
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exactly. this is very good advice. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:10 PM Flag
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what does soon mean? 10 minutes late or an hour late? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:52 PM Flag
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Just let her know what time you need the playdate to wrap up and whether at this point it might make sense to reschedule. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:57 PM Flag
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I would do this. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:39 PM Flag
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Sooo Rude! But if you have had many playdates before and its the first time she has done this, I'd let it pass [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:13 PM Flag
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The fact that she's not usually like this would make me think that it is NOT a sign of disrespect, but rather that something unusual came up. Granted, I wouldn't think about the respect factor either way if it was me. I'd just think about if I should cancel or not based on the rest of my plans for the afternoon. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:19 PM Flag
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Dont cancel this time [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:48 PM Flag
[ - ] Anyone interested celebrating in the tenants of Kwanza every year? We do at my job. White lady here. 14 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:42 PM Flag
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tenets not tenants [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:44 PM Flag
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Thank you. You are correct. Anyway, what do you think of Kwanza? Have you ever looked into it? I love it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:47 PM Flag
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I live in Harlem. Seems cute, and I'm all for festivities. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:55 PM Flag
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It talks about people buying from within their communities to make the community more financially self-sufficient. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:10 PM Flag
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It's not a religious festival at all. I like it a lot. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:11 PM Flag
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Is it similar to Festivus? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:14 PM Flag
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For the rest of us! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:17 PM Flag
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Kwanza is a silly made up holiday. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:08 PM Flag
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As our Halloween, Valentine's day, half of Christmas, Easter Bunny...but hey let's pick on the "black" one. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:10 PM Flag
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are [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:10 PM Flag
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The only two of those I celebrate are Christmas and Easter. In both cases only the religious aspects. The reason I was picking on "the black one" is because that's the topic of the post. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:26 PM Flag
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Of course it's a "made up holiday." Every holiday is a "made up holiday." Good Lord. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:23 PM Flag
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No, many holidays commemorate events. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:33 PM Flag
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No, I get the inspiration I need from my religious faith and practice. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:50 PM Flag
[ - ] Ugh DH is losing his job, it's 1/3 of our HHI, which is not great, but the worst part is that he doesn't want to tell anyone. Anyone have advice for dealing with a lovely DH who is out of work and looking for a job? In his defense, he's already told me he will take more of the responsibility for chores, school run, etc. 21 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:42 PM Flag
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Acknowledge how shit he must be feeling. Don't nag and make him feel worse. Its a confidence thing now. He's likely in shock and denial. Once passed that he will hit bottom. Then its network, network, network to get that next role. btdt. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:56 PM Flag
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+1 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:48 PM Flag
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ita with this. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:01 PM Flag
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good advice. are you posting on other threads? solid advice here. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:12 PM Flag
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OP: completely agree - thank you! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:16 PM Flag
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OP. Thanks. Always nice to be appreciated. Not posting elsewhere today, though am on often. Too much work :( [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:36 PM Flag
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+1 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:45 PM Flag
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He will find something else. Good luck! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:44 PM Flag
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Volunteer work, job hunting, he needs a purpose. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:59 PM Flag
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Meaningful volunteer work. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:59 PM Flag
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Sorry to hear. Sounds like you have the right perspective. Let him know you love him for him, not for his paycheck and you are rooting for him to find something. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:48 PM Flag
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I think he knows it (I've always made much more than he has). I'm just dreading the stress of less money in the house, finding a job, etc. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:53 PM Flag
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Good luck! Sounds sucky but this too shall pass. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:11 PM Flag
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What field? So sorry OP. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:01 PM Flag
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Editorial in tech. He's well known in his space. He's worried because he's 46 and feel like everyone would rather hire a 30 year old. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:51 PM Flag
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Love him through this. He sounds like a good guy. If he wants another job, though, he will have to eventually tell people he is looking. The key to a job is networking. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:55 PM Flag
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I think it's fine not to tell anyone. Hopefully he'll find a job soon and can just tell people he's switching jobs. Why are you itching to tell people? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:10 PM Flag
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I have a close family and it's stressful so I want us to have that support. He just doesn't want to deal with his dad, who is wealthy, well-meaning but a total PITA [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:14 PM Flag
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How old is he? Sucks that we all only care about the bottom line and cost... Therefore layoffs [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:02 PM Flag
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Meh, the startup he was working at made a pivot and they don't need his skill set even though they love him. I get it, and so does he. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:13 PM Flag
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I am going to give you tough advice. Do not coddle him. He needs to work. I don't care if he's scrubbing toilets. He must have an income. Wallowing and coddling will not help. And you need the money. Validate his worth, but level with him that he must generate income. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:46 PM Flag
[ - ] Why don't we insist on having bidets in our bathrooms. I love them 17 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:41 PM Flag
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+1 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:54 PM Flag
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+1 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:54 PM Flag
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+1 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:42 PM Flag
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If I were rich that is the one appointment I would insist on having. Used them in Italy this past summer and in Spain many years ago and I found them indispensable. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:44 PM Flag
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I have never admitted this but I don't exactly know how to use them. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:44 PM Flag
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lol i recently watched a youtube video on how to use one because i was curious! not like anyone shows you! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:46 PM Flag
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+1 I don't get it. Haha. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:21 PM Flag
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get yourself a toto toilet seat! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:45 PM Flag
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I don't know the toilet seat you mention. The bidet is kind of a mini bath.. you can use many times during the day. You always feel fresh. Also, if you're out in the summer walking around in sandals you can wash your feet before you go to bed. It's really a great invention.. quite different from a toilet. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:01 PM Flag
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the toto has a bidet function. its sprays you and the seat is heated. its lovely. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:02 PM Flag
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Is it to wash your ass or your vagina? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:02 PM Flag
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both. and you clean out the bowl after every use as a courtesy for the next person. It is so nice to feel so clean all day long. Even two showers a day don't keep you as fresh feeling as a bidet. Showers aren't build for female anatomy. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:05 PM Flag
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Is there a blow dryer or something? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:09 PM Flag
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I don't feel un fresh in the first place. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:09 PM Flag
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And, apparently, your feet. What a great idea. If only I were rich. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:28 PM Flag
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Coming from a country where we always use water to clean up, just paper was tough here. Now I have squirt bottles at home :) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:15 PM Flag
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What do you do with them? I don't get it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:15 PM Flag
[ - ] I just spent an hour browsing at Saks and not one salesperson acknowledged me. Now I feel extra dumpy. 19 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:38 PM Flag
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I like to be left alone when I shop. If I need help, I'll ask for it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:27 PM Flag
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+1 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:40 PM Flag
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Me too. Nothing worse than getting hassled every 10 minutes when you're just browsing. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:29 PM Flag
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Me too. I HATE when salespeople approach me. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:37 PM Flag
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+2 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:11 PM Flag
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+4 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:32 PM Flag
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You could probably get away with shoplifting. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:41 PM Flag
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Lol [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:40 PM Flag
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aww. don't feel that way, Sweetie. Life is too short. :) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:51 PM Flag
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This has happened to me too. It's so weird. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:45 PM Flag
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please. they work in retail! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:48 PM Flag
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exactly. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:00 PM Flag
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I'm Hispanic. They never seem to come to me, oh well, I don't like being bothered. At least you don't get negative attention. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:01 PM Flag
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Maybe you were invisible? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:03 PM Flag
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you fail to realize a lot of us want not to be bothered at all [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:08 PM Flag
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Maybe they think the opposite of dumpy. When I worked retail, frumpy ladies were always my best customers. They wanted someone to be nice to them, to help them, to make suggestions and sell them complete outfits. They were nice and appreciated my help. It's the skinny dressed to the nines ladies I turned over to colleagues. They were hungry and picky. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:01 PM Flag
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Nah. If you were EXTRA dumpy they'd have been following you about worrying about theft. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:23 PM Flag
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I wish I had an hour to browse at Saks in peace and quiet! Signed, mom of 22 month old [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:46 PM Flag
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Hello there. May I help you find anything? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:40 PM Flag
[ - ] Can you all fill me in on Hunter Elementary Testing? Signed clueless mom. 8 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:37 PM Flag
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live in manhattan, sign up for test, pay money, 50 kids gets spots. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:55 PM Flag
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you're super-late for this, for one thing. Go to website and find a tester, then see if you make the second round. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:43 PM Flag
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I've signed up. Just wondering about test prep and which tester.... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:04 PM Flag
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Do some puzzles and word games. If you signed up you already have the tester. It's a total crap shoot and they only take 25 kids of each gender. Good luck [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:58 PM Flag
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Thanks. Yeah, it's crazy but DH is a smarty pants so he would like to give it a try. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:04 PM Flag
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Your husband is probably too old to attend. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:44 PM Flag
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LOL [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:56 PM Flag
[ - ] Ideas for fun Christmas cards pictures? Single parent, one dc. Yeah, yeah it's early for this. 28 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:26 PM Flag
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I think it's great that you're starting to think about this .. 'tis one thing that I can never get together until it's too late. The rest of the christmas preparationi.e. decorations, music, movies shouldn't start until the beginning of Christmas. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:16 PM Flag
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I'd really like to make all my gifts this year. It's so anti-consumer and so much more meaningful [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:17 PM Flag
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You sound annoying. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:37 PM Flag
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I am. How about you? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:51 PM Flag
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np I always take the picture the weekend before Thanksgiving. If I'm on the ball, I've chosen the card and had it printed early in Nov. Goal is to get them out by Dec 1. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:21 PM Flag
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that's great. :) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:45 PM Flag
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i use a photo from summer vacation. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:45 PM Flag
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that's cool, too. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:52 PM Flag
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You and dc doing fun activity. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:17 PM Flag
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No. Only dcs. So cheesy when the parents get in on the xmas card photo. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:19 PM Flag
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x1000000 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:31 PM Flag
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ITA [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:39 PM Flag
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This [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:21 PM Flag
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NP. I have one dc who looks a little lonely on a xmas card all by himself. So we do family shots. I hate looking at myself in photos, so it is not out of vanity. Believe me. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:31 PM Flag
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i like family photos. i guess this puts me in the same category as those posters deemed horribly tacky for having bookshelves filled with books and framed family photos in their living rooms. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:45 PM Flag
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Me too. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:41 PM Flag
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Right? Like the relatives just aren't chic enough to have hanging around cluttering up your space. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:48 PM Flag
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Oh nonsense. I like to see the whole family because, you know, Christmas is about family and all that. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:47 PM Flag
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Disagree. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:21 PM Flag
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I don't mind seeing a family picture. I draw the line thought at the one of friends family on the beach with dad's flab and man boobs visible. Just the kids would have been fine on that one... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:27 PM Flag
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Tinyprints has great cards. Just upload a photo and pick a layout [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:17 PM Flag
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That's my question. I want an original or creative or funny kind of photo. The rest is easy. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:33 PM Flag
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how old is dc? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:30 PM Flag
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8 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:29 PM Flag
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Wrap you and dc in Christmas lights, tease your hair, and put light bulbs in your mouth. Voila! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:24 PM Flag
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single parent, one dc here. I usually do a couple of shots of dc during fun things during the year and include one small shot of the 2 of us during something fun together. Most of my cards go to family who live far away so I like to do the one shot together - though I am sure some think it is cheesy. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:52 PM Flag
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Have you ever looked up traditional russian wedding photos? Some of them have hilarious ideas. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:27 PM Flag
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Last year I put a photo of my kids draped in Christmas lights. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 09:08 PM Flag
[ - ] Pretty racy scene for a Disney movie- when Jasmine and Aladdin trick Jafar and she's pretending to be in love with him? Hm, haven't seen this since I was a kid but it seems weird now... 11 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:20 PM Flag
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Or in the Hunchback of Notre Dame when Frollo is lusting after Esmeralda [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:22 PM Flag
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Ew yeah! So creepy! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:35 PM Flag
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omg! even watching this as a kid, i thought it was weird [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:29 PM Flag
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Of course in the USA, this is what bothers us. Not the fact that Aladdin was being murdered by being buried alive in sand at that time. (Or maybe that was Jasmine, a few minutes later?) But the fact that Jasmine was coming onto someone. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:12 PM Flag
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ILY [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:25 PM Flag
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Cuz she's a freakin hoor. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:25 PM Flag
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Lol. Okay okay you're right but this happens to be the scene I just saw. I'm watching now and yes, it's absurd. How am I going to explain the flying carpet to my dd? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:26 PM Flag
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It's magical. How old is your child? Magical thinking only lasts a few years. I'm Irish so I love to believe in fairies and the like. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:30 PM Flag
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I was kidding but yes... It IS magical [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:35 PM Flag
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How about when Minnie bats her eyelashes at Mickey? Disgusting. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:24 PM Flag
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I used to blush when Simba and Nala were tumbling with "can't you feel the love tonight?" in the background. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:21 PM Flag
[ - ] Period sex? Really. Sounds fascinating. I would like to try it (especially the going downtown part). What about you? WWYD: period sex or anal? http://nymag.com/thecut/2014/09/blood-hounds-theyre-obsessed-with-period-sex.html 17 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:19 PM Flag
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Are you 12? You've really never had sex on your period before? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:19 PM Flag
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Seriously. Not my fave but of course it's happened in a lifetime. Actually helps a lot with cramps [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:21 PM Flag
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I agree with OP. I tend to shy away. Worried about the smell emanating from the sheets to my nose. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:23 PM Flag
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Go do your homework. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:24 PM Flag
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thats why i am asking here. curious. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:25 PM Flag
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My first time was on my period. I don't recommend it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:17 PM Flag
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Dated a guy who LOVED going down on me during my period. I read that article this morning and was surprised there are more men with that particular fetish. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:22 PM Flag
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omg this is so weird [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:49 PM Flag
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Was his name Patrick Bateman? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:40 PM Flag
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He was an Irish author. Let him do it because I was helpless against the sexy accent and the way he successfully pulled off suspenders. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:06 PM Flag
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period sex- whatever. but i would NEVER want a guy going down there at that time! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:54 PM Flag
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why do you care? if he is in to it and likes the "smell" then i say go for it (and slip down to the butt while you are at it!) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:04 PM Flag
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Daisy Duck was ALWAYS very flirtatious and so was the grownup female childhood friend from Bambi. Remember? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:45 PM Flag
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The mature Doe. I can't remember her name [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:45 PM Flag
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Felice or something like that. Not sure what this has to do with period sex. Unless you know something about Bambi that I don't. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:49 PM Flag
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whoops wrong post. sorry. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:02 PM Flag
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i orgasm more easily than usual on my period. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:13 PM Flag
[ - ] S/o - why is a second bathroom so necessary for 4 people? Dh is at work, kids are at school... We need a bigger space but the bathroom doesn't feel like the reason 18 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:15 PM Flag
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If you can get away without out, bless you. When four people try to pee at once in the mornings and evenings, plus DH and I both work and need to shower, it's gets a little tight. And quite terrible when we have guests staying overnight. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:05 PM Flag
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This I agree with. Really hard to have guests. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:21 PM Flag
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It isn't. Large parts of the worlds population has no bathroom at all as a matter of fact. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:06 PM Flag
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as kids get older, it becomes even more necessary [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:21 PM Flag
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A second bathroom would be a luxury item for me. It was fine when it was just two of us. Now, everyone seems to be getting up and out at the same time and while it's workable, would love to have the freedom of two bathrooms. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:09 PM Flag
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I have both, but if I had to give up either the 2nd br or the W/D, I would give up the 2nd bathroom in a heartbeat. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:25 PM Flag
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But large parts of the world's population have no W/D at all as a matter of fact. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:18 PM Flag
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I know. I made that argument once to someone who was NYC-bashing. They told me I was an idiot. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:21 PM Flag
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They also don't pay anywhere remotely near what it costs to live in NYC. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:44 PM Flag
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Ding ding ding ding. Everytime we argue that we don't need some small luxury because starving children in China don't have it, we seem to be ignoring the fact that the average monthly rent of a nice UMC apartment is more than an entire family earns in a year. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:46 PM Flag
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Four people waking up between 6 and 6:30 who need to be out of the house by 7:30. Three-four showers. DD and I each take 1/2 hour in the bathroom. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:31 PM Flag
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Try having 2 teenaged girls getting ready for high school at the same time as you and DH getting ready for work. Suddenly, 2 bathrooms seems much more necessary [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:31 PM Flag
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Necessary? No. But really helpful. My boys both shower in the morning as do DH & I - I think that would be really challenging if we only had 1 shower, BUT if that were the case, we'd change the way we do things - likely the kids would shower at night! And there ARE times when 2 people both really need to go to the bathroom - saves you from a lot of emergencies. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:25 PM Flag
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Yeah. Try having 2 school aged kids and 2 adults with the stomach virus. No one wants to wait their turn, after 3 other people, to have explosive diarrhea in the one bathroom that everyone is pushing to get into [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:41 PM Flag
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My dh uses the bathroom as his office... when kids need to go they need to go. dh doesn't get this at all and gets angry with me when I rush him out. 2nd bathroom was the reason we upgraded apartments. if you ask my dh he will tell you that 1 bathroom wasn't a problem for us. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:34 PM Flag
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You'll reconsider that when the family all get the stomach flu at once. Happened to us twice last year. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:02 PM Flag
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I would kill for a 2nd bathroom - but I have teenagers and we all seem to need to get ready at the same time. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:09 PM Flag
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I would kill for a second bathroom so I don't have to smell my DH stinky ass!! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:00 PM Flag
[ - ] Brooklyn Private Schools, what's the buzz/vibe for: Poly Prep, Packer, Berkeley Carroll, St Ann's, Brooklyn Friends? Any others? Any BTDT advice welcome (or current parents). Starting the application process for K. Thanks! 5 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
NY Schools 09.16.14, 07:11 PM Flag
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FWIW, St. Ann's has already closed apps for next school year. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:28 PM Flag
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What?! Seriously? For what grades? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:18 PM Flag
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All hard to get into, since there are so many families in Brooklyn and so few schools. Apply to all, tour all. You'll get a feel for what you like. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:30 PM Flag
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And K is not an entry point for many of these, they are already full from 3 and 4 year olds since they have pre-Ks. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:19 PM Flag
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There is also Brooklyn Heights Montesorri. And some parochial schools, including Hannah Senesh and some Catholic schools. But there are so many good publics that many parents don't bother with privates. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:30 PM Flag
[ - ] How much does a managing director at an asset management firm make? Not a pm or anything like that - someone involved in the business / sales side. 16 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:09 PM Flag
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200k + 800k bonus [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:24 PM Flag
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Depends totally on the firm, its size, etc. All in, likely at least $300k. If it is a large firm, them likely $500k+, could make $1m+ if senior at a top firm. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:14 PM Flag
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+1 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:45 PM Flag
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Op : thanks. I think there is a big range but I was trying to narrow it down a bit. First date on Thurs! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:20 PM Flag
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Really? This is something you think about before a first date? How old are you? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:31 PM Flag
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Seriously! My first questions on first dates were usually more general...Are you employed? Do you like your job? NOT How much money do I think you make? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:46 PM Flag
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It's due diligence. Every smart businesswoman does her due diligence on potential clients. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:48 PM Flag
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Every smart businesswoman has her OWN income and worries about things like: Ambition, compatibility, respect etc. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:50 PM Flag
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I don't think you quite understand what business the OP is in. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:57 PM Flag
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OH...I do...It's called gold-digging 101. She, of course, is probably wondering why she isn't married yet. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:01 PM Flag
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Again, how old are you? If you're in your mid-20s, fine. If you're older than that, I hate to say it, but this is why you're single. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:58 PM Flag
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Gold digger!!! Congrats [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:18 PM Flag
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I think it's more about how much $ he brings in. If in risk, compliance or operations he is not bringing in money. If he's losing clients, or only has small clients (i.e. Who don't have much $) he's not making much either. Can totally vary. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:52 PM Flag
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Marketers routinely get MD titles just so they look good to prospects. What he is making completely depends on what rain he is making. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:02 PM Flag
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which may or may not be related to his skills- a lot depends on the salability of the firm's products for the market environment. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:05 PM Flag
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Case in point. I worked at an asset management firm. My kid and an MD's ended up in the same very expensive private special ed school. I come to find out from him the tuitions are a huge burden; he lives in an undesirable Boro and neighborhood; and is... believe it or not... a regular person! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:13 PM Flag
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