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[ - ] WDYT? DF has a 4 year old and a newborn. I already bought a gift for the new baby. DF sends email (a day before I'm seeing her and her kids) to not bring a gift for the baby, but instead bring a gift for the 4 year old for becoming a "big brother". Says there are jealousy issues. Is this a little over the top? Plus, what do I do know with the monogrammed gift I got the baby that I cannot return? 39 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:48 PM Flag
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give to the baby. but give it to her in stealth. get a $20 or even $10 toy for the 4yo. prob, it is the act of seeing baby get gifts that she's concerned about, not actually receiving gifts. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:52 PM Flag
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+1. Something small for the boy is all she wants, something that makes it all about him. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:12 PM Flag
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Yet, it isn't about him. 4 is a fine age to start learning other people are celebrated sometimes. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:20 PM Flag
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but it isn't about the baby either because obv the second baby hardly needs anything except diapers and is aware of nothing. it is for the parents. and sometimes, it serves the parents to soothe the older child's feelings. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:37 PM Flag
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Second children need personalized keepsakes. And clothes if different sex/season [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 03:00 PM Flag
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NEED lol [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:29 PM Flag
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Give it, you already bought it. Reply as such, she has to understand. Crazy [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:52 PM Flag
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Tell her the truth - that you already bought a gift for the baby. Buy a treat for the 4 year old, like a cupcake or something that he will like. Put the baby's gift in your bag and when the older brother is not around, give her the gift. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:53 PM Flag
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you always buy something for the big sister/brother...I thought everyone did, but I guess not [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:41 PM Flag
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+1 I always give a token gift to the big brother/sister [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:54 PM Flag
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OMG no everyone doesn't. Some of us are capable of deali g with a jealous 4 year old without giving them presents. Soooo OTT. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:07 PM Flag
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but it's such a little thing, why not? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:08 PM Flag
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this I guess I don't see what the big deal is, the poor kid is 4 and his life has been turned upside down .... a present is not OTT imo [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:00 PM Flag
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because it creates a generation of children with a sense of entitlement? MIL asked me the other day why I didn't by my two year old a present when it was his older brother's birthday 'so that he has something to unwrap'. Ummmm, well, because it ISNT the two year old's birthday? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:14 PM Flag
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the birthday thing I get, never understood buying all the kids a gift for but a new baby, I think the older brother/sister should get a gift also [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:04 PM Flag
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Why??? It's not their birthday! Birthdays are special, it's once a year and you get a present on that special day. Why should siblings get presents if it's not their birthday?! Urgh, no wonder we have a generation of entitiled kids. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:08 PM Flag
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lol I totally screwed up that reply now that I am reading it. I meant to say I don't get the birthday thing, I never give extra gifts to siblings on birthdays but for new babies I do...wow, I guess I should slow down and pay a little attention to what I am posting ha ha ha [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:35 PM Flag
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she said she understands why you feel the way you do about birthdays but she doesn't see why an older brother shouldn't get a gift instead of the baby, who obv can't appreciate it anyway and has all the baby gear from older sib. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:26 PM Flag
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that's different. each kid gets a turn at a birthday. but a newborn baby is getting gifts galore just for breathing. plus, the older one has never experienced competition for mom and dad. everyone can do as he wishes but to me, some loot for a baby sib's arrival seems rather harmless. or else, i'd just not let older sib see any gifts for the newborn. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:19 PM Flag
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THANK YOU! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:21 PM Flag
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Not to mention rude adults who send emails requesting gifts - WTF? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:08 PM Flag
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The OP's friend must be having a very hard time of it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:58 PM Flag
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If she is having a hard time with this - it's going to be a long bumpy road [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:22 PM Flag
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You're right. I wrote that but also wrote the post about the overly indulgent, anxious parents.... the more I think about this, the more I am annoyed for the OP. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:41 PM Flag
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THIS [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:58 PM Flag
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Just stop in cvs on the way there and get the four year old some bubbles and a stuffed bear or something. Bring the monogrammed blanket too but don't wrap it or make a big deal out of it being a gift. Just take it out of your bag and hand it to her. Fwiw, in this situation I always buy gifts for both kids, but your df was rude to put you on the spot. In her defense she's probably exhausted and overwhelmed and can't deal with another tantrum and feels close enough to you to ask for some help. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:42 PM Flag
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What a completely lovely and reasonable response. I like you! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:54 PM Flag
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me too [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:14 PM Flag
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:) NP our thoughtful friends stopped at Duane Reade or CVS and got my older DC a light-up bouncy ball with Disney characters in it. This small gesture was very well-received by my older DC! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:08 PM Flag
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Bring the 4yo a cool big kid toy they can play with solo, pass baby gift to friend on the down low, and bring food. You must be a good friend if she would ask for your help with this. My kids are 4 years apart and in love with each other, but the beginning adjustment is tough on the 4yo, who is old enough to understand that they feel jealous and can verbalize it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:47 PM Flag
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No need to bring a cool toy. That's ridiculous. A token thing is fine. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:14 PM Flag
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Yeah like a $2 thing from cvs can be "cool" to a 4yo [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:30 PM Flag
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You email back you already have a gift for the baby and you will quietly hand it over and you will pick up something small for 4 year old (bubbles, sticker book etc - think in the 1-2 dollar range. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:06 PM Flag
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Overly indulgent, anxious parents like this always end up with 4 year olds who are running the show. I understand she's stressed, but this micromanaging rudeness is exactly WHY she ended up with this problem in the first place. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:01 PM Flag
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This x millions. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:23 PM Flag
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My friends know me better than to ask this. Not my style [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:23 PM Flag
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+1 Not my style to have friends like this [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:30 PM Flag
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It is always best to buy something for both kids. I can't imagine why anyone would not do this. The baby doesn't need a monogrammed blanket! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:27 PM Flag
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oh boy [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:30 PM Flag
[ - ] Coming to NYC next weekend with DH and DS who is 1.5. I want to take him to some toddler friendly playgrounds or activities. We are staying near Columbus Circle, where should we go? Thank you! Also would love some restaurant recommendations in the area. 20 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:44 PM Flag
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Landmarc is your go-to place to eat. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:47 PM Flag
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That looks great, just booked us for brunch one day. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:51 PM Flag
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how? they only take reservations fro groups of six or more. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:02 PM Flag
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Open table let me [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:25 PM Flag
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Kid friendly but it becomes a zoo. Note that if you want wine, you have to purchase half bottles. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 03:06 PM Flag
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Herschel playground [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:02 PM Flag
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I hate herschel! That park is way too large and way too crowded to keep a good eye on your child. Lots of blind spots and so many kids and so large that you end up running around just so you can keep an eye on your kid. Blech. Plus it is so crowded with tourists and their kids that it's a madhouse. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:54 PM Flag
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Any smaller playgrounds you would recommend? I'm looking forward to walking around and exploring the city with DS, so would love something that is full of tourists! Been to NYC hundreds of times, but never with a child. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:56 PM Flag
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Go to Central Park! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:14 PM Flag
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Adventure Playground across from Tavern on the Green [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 03:04 PM Flag
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Yes, that one is cute and small. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 03:42 PM Flag
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You mean Heckscher [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 03:05 PM Flag
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there's a toddler playground in central park just above tavern on the green (the one lower down on the hill). lots of restaurants in the area are fine with kids. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:08 PM Flag
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Yes it's near 67th street. All of Central Park is great. Lots of great places to see in addition to playgrounds. Ponds, fountains, statues (kids love the alice and wonderland statue, near the east 70s). Hecksher is fine as long as your child stays in the toddler section. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:21 PM Flag
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NP. My 1.5yo loves the CP zoo an the carousel, and patting the carriage horses. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 03:05 PM Flag
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This one is called Adventure Playground [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 03:05 PM Flag
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isn't that the big kids one furhter up the hill? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 03:41 PM Flag
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Museum of Natural History, then there is a playground directly across the street in Central Park. The museum has a decent restaurant. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:28 PM Flag
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Historical Society Museum has a kids area in the basement. Less crowded than Museum of Natural History. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 03:06 PM Flag
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we get to AMNH when it opens, spend a couple of hours, leave when it starts getting crazy. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 03:12 PM Flag
[ - ] S/O to the cooking post: For those of you who say you get takeout most nights, what kind of takeout do you get? 1 Reply [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:43 PM Flag
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lots of chinese, italian, pizza, mexican, "american" -- but usually limited options. seafood and cajun if we can find it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:21 PM Flag
[ - ] Is Kiwi back?? 1 Reply [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:34 PM Flag
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no, it's just some dumbass who needs gainful employment. kiwi was back on about a year ago. she sounded like she got her crap together/matured. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:38 PM Flag
[ - ] holy crap. you guys cook. i would like to know how it relates to income or maybe some of you just really like cooking because you think it's healthful. anyway, please state how many times you cook during the week (including things like picking up roasted chicken then making quesadilla the next night with it) and HHI. you can just say 500K if you make millions, if you want. food budget hardly matters after about that point. 80 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:24 PM Flag
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I am the roast-chicken-and-quesadilla poster. We have a HHI of around $200K, and we live in a middle-class burb. I was flabbergasted that someone responded and said that the ideas I suggested seemed like a "lot of work". Those were the easiest cooking ideas I could think of. The responder asked me how long it took to "pull chicken". Like two minutes, you just shred it with forks. If you need something quicker than that, you definitely need to go the takeout route! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:27 PM Flag
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that was me! it takes me a good 20 minutes to get roasted chicken meat separated from the bones for storage. i am guessing you just cut the breast meat or just the thighs or drumstick and mash? seriously, i salute you but i could not do that much cooking with young children around. kudos, though! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:25 PM Flag
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OR: Just rip big hunks of meat off: the breast, the thigh. Then take two forks and shred that mothafucka up. Honestly, it should only take a few minutes. Then rip off any little pieces still clinging to the bones and add that to the shredded stuff. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:26 PM Flag
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^Let me add a disclaimer here: I really like to cook. When I have free time on days off or weekends, I like to bake my own bread and stuff like that. So maybe what seems like "hardly any work at all" to me sounds like a pain in the ass to someone who hates cooking. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:28 PM Flag
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yeah, also, maybe you are more efficient than i am. i used to like cooking but since kids, it just hasn't happened. just the cleanup alone is a MAJOR deterrent! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:32 PM Flag
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[ Removed by moderator ] [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:46 PM Flag
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can't ebola strike down this asshole? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:34 PM Flag
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I am like this poster and I have my DH clean up. HATE cleaning up. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:47 PM Flag
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ditto. if i cook, its his job to clean up. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:58 PM Flag
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NP: life must be very hard for you if cutting up an already roasted chicken is too hard and time consuming... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 09:50 PM Flag
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Nah - takeout takes longer to organise, order and wait for! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:16 PM Flag
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350K both WOHP. I cook breakfast and dinner and I don't use mix to make pancakes. I pack lunch for kids only. I cook every meal on the weekend but once in a while I do make pizza or roasted chicken on weekends. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:16 PM Flag
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^^ yes, I do it to feed them healthy balanced meals and its a lot of work. I don't do it because I love cooking [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:40 PM Flag
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op: i am also surprised at how many women truly enjoy cooking. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:48 PM Flag
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HHI is over 1.5. I cook really simple things since I usually now cook only for myself and the two younger kids. I have two in college; when they're home and their friends are around it is trays of wings, lasagna, ziti, meatball subs, muffuletta sandwiches, macaroni and cheese. With the two younger I make soup witth dumplings, homemade pizza, cold pasta salad or spaghetti, grilled cheese. Basically pizza place type food. It is what they want, so it is what I make. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:37 PM Flag
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HHI 400k, both WOH but I work a flexible schedule and am home at a decent time. I cook 6 or 7 nights a week, love to cook. Usually one meal is something easy like grill some chicken and throw it on a salad and one meal is usually leftovers on a night where we are busy with after school activities. Cooking relaxes me and I love to make healthy things [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:26 PM Flag
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My HHI is 5 million. We get takeout every night [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:40 PM Flag
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op: this is kind of what we do. it is better when i cook, though. there are some things you can't order out. but alas, it is just too much work. maybe when the kids are teenagers... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:33 PM Flag
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So unhealthy. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:57 PM Flag
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Even if I had the cash, I would get really bored. Would much rather hire someone to cook for the week. My best friend came from a really wealthy family - they had a housekeeper who would make piles of great food, cut up fruit and veggies, and the fridge would be so beautiful. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:48 PM Flag
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op: i am going to blame dh as to why i no longer cook. he is the nicest guy but zero help around the house. plus, i am also completely in charge of dcs' education. i really am very impressed at how much you guys make family meals. i wish i had the time and energy to do it myself. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:31 PM Flag
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Turn off the tv and the internet and spend that time sleeping, exercising, and cooking more nutritious meals. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:57 PM Flag
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there's internet but no tv. prob, i could make more efficient use of my time, but a lot of it goes into doing things for the kids. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:13 PM Flag
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i cook family meals in part because i like to cook and find it relaxing;also i try tog et my kids involved because i want them to know how. but for some people its very stressful and i understand why they'd skip it. (I also think a lot of takeout isn't that healthy, but this is partly my own hang-up.) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:58 PM Flag
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NYC middle class, mortgage paid off. I cook because I like it; it's a good way of shifting gears after the day. And I am a master of the 30-minute meal. At this time of year, I have a lot of fresh stuff from the Greenmarket, which I quickly cut up and sauté with meat of some sort, serve over pasta, rice, quinoa or whatever. In cold weather, I do more dishes that work for a couple of nights, i.e. lasagna or roast chicken on the weekend to feed us during the week. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:50 PM Flag
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HHI is 225k and we both WOH. First, DH and I both love to cook. Second, we're vegetarians so in the long term it is much easier for us to cook because we have better options at home than with carry-out, etc. We normally cook a few big pots of things on the weekends and then supplement those dishes with salads, rice, stir fry or pasta. We don't spend a lot of time on meals during the week, but we've been doing it so long that we've made it a science. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:53 PM Flag
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HHI $500k and I was the cook on Sunday poster. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:42 PM Flag
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200K, I cook everyday except Friday. I don't like take - out food very much. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:55 PM Flag
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HHI over 1.5 - we have a cook that makes all our meals from scratch, 5-6 days per week. emphasis is on fresh, low to the ground meals - no processed components ever at home. When we eat out, I'm less fastidious. Kids eat most meals home. DH prob eats out 3x/week for work, we do 2 meals out over the weekend. rest of time, home cooked healthy meals from scratch [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:44 PM Flag
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^^^ if we didn't have the cook's help, you can bet it'll be takeout and pasta - kudos to you all for cooking for your family! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:48 PM Flag
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What is a "low to the ground" meal? I'm picturing mushrooms, lol. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:00 PM Flag
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term for unprocessed food really - as in food that is in their most natural state, so low to the ground. LOL prob not good at explaining. I swear it's a proper term ;) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:56 PM Flag
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i think it means growing on the ground or walking on the ground instead of being made say, in a factory. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:58 PM Flag
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perfect - that's it. thank you! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:59 PM Flag
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thanks! I just never heard it before. very interesting! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:03 PM Flag
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does she come every day or does she precook? what kinds of things does she make? i'd be interested in something like this but we like such ecclectic things (sichuan, korean, thai to name a few) that i've never really considered it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:50 PM Flag
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she comes everyday. Meals are nothing fancy or elaborate. Stir fries, roasts, stews etc just that they are made from scratch. I used to suggest menus, showed her recipes but now she just runs with it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:18 PM Flag
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so how long is she there? i assume she cleans up after the cooking. how much does this run? it sounds good but we'd really like to have some indian, chinese and korean if we had a cook. prob too much to ask. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:41 PM Flag
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On average, 3 hrs/day. We pay her $300/week. She's an aunt of our old housekeeper, she doesn't really need the money as she is retired but the benefits to our family is priceless. And prob too much to ask that someone be well versed in the cuisines you suggested. Not impossible but certainly not right off the bat. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:42 PM Flag
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yeah, prob so. i think you are getting a pretty good dea. i've heard chefs costing something around $35k-40k a year. i'll have to keep it in the back of my head. thanks. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:52 PM Flag
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HHI avg over 1M. I SAHM now but I used to cook even when I was an I banker. Not bc I like to but bc I want organic meat and fusion Indian/Mediterranean food. Hard to buy that :-( I cook 5 days and eat leftovers the rest of the time. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:48 PM Flag
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fusion Indian/Med sounds very interesting! examples please! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:02 PM Flag
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I am originally from sou Asia so I like spicy food but I don't like the heavy oiliness and vegetables cooked to death. I do chicken strips marinated in tikka spice broiled/sautéed, mix vegetable rice spiced with some pullao spice, lightly sautéed green beans w mustard seeds. Usually have some Indian lentil soup in hand always. My American friends really like it bc it has flavor/kick but is not overwhelming. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:09 PM Flag
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thank you for the explanation! definitely want to play around with this idea [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:12 PM Flag
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HHI 400K, both WOH. I cook almost every night. I enjoy it. Keep it basic and it doesn't take much time. A protein and a vegetable. Jamie Oliver has a great 30 minute cookbook if you need help on ideas and are limited on time. I sometimes do one pot and that makes life easier. Food doesn't have to take a long time to be good. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:09 PM Flag
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+1 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:11 PM Flag
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I'm the poster below and you sound just like me! I'll have to check out the book [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:00 PM Flag
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OR: Jamie Oliver rocks!!! Check out his website. He is one of my favorite chef. Good healthy food that he isn't snotty over. Doesn't take forever and is kid friendly. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:18 PM Flag
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Thanks, I will check it out! I'm always running out of ideas because DH thinks he's going to "get fat" if a food has more than a handful ingredients. (Yes, you ready that correctly. DH. Not teenage SD.) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:11 PM Flag
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Your DH has an ED [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:52 PM Flag
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a dh: HHI: ~$200K. I cook about seven meals a week and prep several others. DW is not much of a cooker. My middle son (8yo) makes breakfast for himself and brother 2x/wk (either hard boiled or scrambled eggs usually.) On nights dw works kids usually get left overs/order in. DW cooks 1 or 2 meals/wk and probably makes more of the school lunches than I but we mix that up. The biggest thing is I like cooking and do it well. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:58 PM Flag
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i guess dw hit the jackpot with you. i am so impressed by your 8yo. i don't even let my 9yo near the stove. maybe i should see if he can do some very light cooking. i guess we'll never know how much our kids can do unless we let them try. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:03 PM Flag
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NP: my mother never let me cook and I decided a different approach with DD. I had her assist me with baking at first because it is a lot of prep. She's turning 8 next week and made a tasty tomato soup last night from scratch. I stayed near her at the stove when she was sautéing and stirring, but she did a great job. Its helpful to start out simple and let them work their way up. She can make her own scrambled eggs too. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:08 PM Flag
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op: Awesome. I think it also helps if you get them their own tools. DS has his own paring knife, his own 10" skillet, his own peeler and bowl scraper, etc. (In truth, we probably needed those items anyway but by making them "his" he really gets some buy in.) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:19 PM Flag
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His older brother has little interest. I took 8yo to Chef this summer and when Favreau took his son to the cook's supply place and bought him his own knife, my boy whispered, "Hey, that is like when you bought me my knife." [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:14 PM Flag
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^^^ To be fair, my dw does more around the house than I, this is just an area where I measure up well. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:15 PM Flag
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but it is a very integral part of the "house"! kudos to you. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:29 PM Flag
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Thanks. He's a great kid and I'm (we're) really lucky. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:22 PM Flag
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+1 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:52 PM Flag
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HHI $700k+. I cook almost every night. Not sure how this relates to income as I used to eat takeout every night when I was in my 20s and hardly making any money. DH and I are health nuts, just thinking about eating takeout several times a week makes my jeans feel tight. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:59 PM Flag
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HHI is 130K (LA mom) and I cook six nights a week. It's my hobby - I probably take classes at least once a month. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:01 PM Flag
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Where do you take classes? This sounds interesting and fun. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:09 PM Flag
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Sur la Table - love them! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:23 PM Flag
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HHI about 500K and we cook maybe 4 to 5 days of the week. Weekends we eat out a fair bit. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:06 PM Flag
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75K. Divorced mom, 2 teen DCs. I cook just about every meal and we hardly ever do take out. I cook from scratch - no roasted chicken pick up or anything. Honestly, I have been doing it since I was a child and it is sort of ingrained in me now; can get really good, healthy stuff on the table without much effort. Going out to dinner once in a while, and sometimes I will give the kids $10 so they can grab lunch in the neighborhood with friends. I also entertain a few times a month, so will cook dinner for frends. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:11 PM Flag
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DH is the cook in our family. He is home by 5 pm, I get home around 8 pm. HHI is $185K. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:12 PM Flag
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When I was working full time, I cooked 2-3x a week? and even then it was a struggle. We just recently moved and Im not currently working so now I am cooking everyday. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:18 PM Flag
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HHI ~ 350K. cook 4-5 nights/week. i usually grill salmon and veggies, rice cooker. rotisserie chicken with salad and crescent rolls. teaching DD7 to make mac and cheese with broccoli mixed in. we also made spaghetti and meatballs one night. panko crusted pork chops and green beans is a big favorite. DH does rice/bean/cheese quesadillas, grills marinated steak. shake and bake chicken is also easy. broccoli/chicken pasta, sausage/broccoli rabe pasta. i throw chicken thighs, garlic, rosemary, thyme, carrots, onions, and potatoes in a baking dish for 45min. i actually find cooking relaxing, especially if DH can distract the kids. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:46 PM Flag
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60K, and I cook most of our meals. Approx. 3 times a week. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:36 PM Flag
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It also very much depends if people are living in the city or the burbs. In the suburbs you often have no choice and HAVE to cook! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:54 PM Flag
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HHI 300k. Both WFT but DH WAH full time and I WAH part time so we have more flexibility as far as throwing something in to cook, and as far as getting home at a reasonable time. We eat homemade most of the time, but tend toward leftovers on the days I commute bc I dont get home until 645/7. I really like cooking. Baking on the other hand is very infrequent and the extent is usually a few scoops of cookie dough from a pillsbury log and popping in toaster oven for 8 min :) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 07:29 PM Flag
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HH1 about 1 million. I order take-out 1 night/week and we go out 1 night/week as a family. My husband cooks on the weekends, I cook a few nights, and we eat leftovers the other nights. I try to make enough to freeze leftovers for nights I don't feel like cooking. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 09:54 PM Flag
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HHI 1 million per year, cook about 3 times per week because I like to cook for my family. Usually I cook from scratch using Cooking light recipes, otherwise I do some ready to cook Fresh Direct meals. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 11:40 PM Flag
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HHI $750k, both WOH. I cook hot breakfast each weekday (oatmeal, eggs and toast) and DH does weekend breakfasts. I cook Sunday through Thursday nights, Friday is out and DH grills on Saturday. In summer/fall I rely on the greenmarkets, and in winter I cook a lot on Sundays to manage through the week - stews, roasts, tagines, crockpot. I like to cook but wish I had more time to try new things. 4th DC is in high school and I'm just about done... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.17.14, 02:12 AM Flag
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I cook almost all the time. Sometimes we go out on weekends but never order in. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.17.14, 03:39 AM Flag
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I cook 5 or 6 nights per week - I like doing it. I am currently at home on maternity leave (in Australia, where we get one year) and have a nine mo baby. Our household income is $350k, more when I go back to work. I have two bachelors degrees and one masters degree, I'm a lawyer and my husband is a digital producer. If I didn't cook, he would. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.17.14, 04:16 AM Flag
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HHI: fist full of singles and coupons. Cooking: every night. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.17.14, 11:33 AM Flag
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ILY [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.17.14, 12:44 PM Flag
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I'd be more interested in the weight of the posters vs. the HHI. That's where the real connection is. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.17.14, 12:35 PM Flag
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No there isn't. That's a ridiculous connection. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.17.14, 02:06 PM Flag
[ - ] How would you handle this the right way? Throughout the past year, I got nothing but positive feedback at work. Just received my performance review (which takes into account the feedback of those I work with) and there was a great deal of criticism, negative remarks, and feedback (a few specific examples that seem to be taken out of context) that I did not anticipate. This has never happened to me and none of this input was given to me when the situations supposedly arose. I am a bit taken aback and disappointed. I work hard, try to anticipate and add value as best I can, have mastered prioritization, treat others respectfully. I have two young DCs but when I am in the office, I do my best to be as efficient as possible. 14 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:05 PM Flag
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They are making a paper trail - speak to your boss and ask what has happened, and how you can improve. Get it in writing and follow it to show improvement. BTDT from the bosses' side, sorry. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:09 PM Flag
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Thanks. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:15 PM Flag
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Meant to add that it is in writing and none of this was brought to my attention when it supposedly happened. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:16 PM Flag
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Yes - the feedback is in writing - you need a plan for improvement in writing and then you need to stick to it. GL [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:43 PM Flag
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I am annoyed that these so-called issues were never brought to my attention. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:03 PM Flag
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This is why I left corporate and went solo. No one in management ever wants to deal with problems as they arise; they don't want the confrontation and they usually don't have the skills to do it well and get a positive outcome. So it all waits until the annual review, when it is far too late to do anything about it, because we have all already moved on. Also, the last two companies I worked for, before I went out on my own, had promotion/raise/bonus policies that limited each team - only the top X% of each team/department could be rated "exceeds expectations" or above, and only those at the highest appraisal levels could be given the full raise or annual bonus amount - so managers stored up all of the negatives they could, to ensure they had enough "reasons" to down-rate most of the team. My last year there, I was the only one rated for a full bonus, and morale sucked. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:05 PM Flag
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It's poor management - again, write it up as a response [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:23 PM Flag
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I would look for another job and leave [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:10 PM Flag
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Reply in writing to boss (cc HR and maybe boss's boss depending on the relationship) with almost exactly what you wrote here. Delete anything about children/ home life. Ask for a meeting to discuss in person. Sounds like you have a very inexperienced boss. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:54 PM Flag
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I would do this and start putting feelers out for a new job. This happened to me at the start of the recession, and it turned out they were setting us (me and quite a few others) up to be fired. I'd always had great performance reviews before that. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:31 PM Flag
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Or it sounds like you have a boss that is moving in the direction of sandbagging you [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:55 PM Flag
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How long have your been there? I had reviewer training in my company not long ago (I'm new here) and I as surprised by how much we were encouraged to make sure the review encompassed the entire year and even if there were issues that had been overcome to note them, etc etc. I, of course, also have a boss who I imagine had similar training, so not looking forward to receiving mine. The informal mid-year was nothing but accolades. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:33 PM Flag
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Dust off that resume and start a serious job search. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:43 PM Flag
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So it could be one of two things - posters above could be correct that a paper trail is being created, but it could also be the culture of this company for feedback is changing. Too many corporations have gotten stuck by just giving messages like, "great job!" without specifics and are starting to take the mgmt consulting route of providing detailed constructive feedback. For people used to just hearing glowing, positive reviews, it seems very harsh. I would have a frank conversation about what you need to do to address the issues raised and proactively ask for feedback from boss and peers after every project or milestone. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:57 PM Flag
[ - ] how much to pay nanny for overnight stay? 1 Reply [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:02 PM Flag
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my nanny asks $325 for 24 hrs [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:16 PM Flag
[ - ] My nanny used to clean while dc napped but like all good things this ended... I am having cleaning lady come over to take a look at the apartment to give me an estimate. I asked my nanny to let her in but didn't explain why. Is this an issue? Do I need to explain why the woman is there? 16 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:59 PM Flag
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Why wouldn't you? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:00 PM Flag
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Why wouldn't I explain myself? Is that what you mean? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:04 PM Flag
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Yes. Does the nanny know it's OK for this person to be going into everyone's bedrooms. It's a different story when it's the plumber and purpose is clear. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:58 PM Flag
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I said a woman will come over so please open the door ad let her look at the apartment. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:43 PM Flag
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i don't get why you wouldn't? wont she think it strange this woman walking around your apartment? Also, gives the cleaning woman a heads up that you do not communicate well since she is going to show up and the person there has no clue why she is there. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:07 PM Flag
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1) I didn't have a chance to explain as cleaning woman showed up without notice. 2) I am super annoyed with the nanny because cleaning was an agreed upon task and am planning to replace her with someone cheaper so that I can pay for cleaning woman separately. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:12 PM Flag
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the cleaning lady showed up without notice, that's not a good sign for an employee - I would probably pass on that one and keep looking [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:55 PM Flag
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she told me she would stop by during the week but didn't specify when and just showed up this moning. I called nanny and asked to let this woman in and let her look at the apartment. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:44 PM Flag
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so your nanny just said no, I am not cleaning anymore? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:56 PM Flag
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she just did less and less cleaning until she totally cut it out...I am furios. Hiring housekeepe now and am looking at dacare as a way to faze her out in the near future. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:42 PM Flag
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she does less and less and you don't say anything? why? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:59 PM Flag
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Seriously. Op wants to play mind games with nanny and make her worried she is getting fired. Immature and childish. I would quit in a ny minute and warn cleaning lady :) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:13 PM Flag
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I would LOVE it if she quit [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:43 PM Flag
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why not be upfront with her? you have to clean as you used to or i will have to replace you. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:47 PM Flag
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Because you don't communicate and then blame it completely on her! NP [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 03:11 PM Flag
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Then fire her [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 05:05 PM Flag
[ - ] travelling moms (and dads) - planning a business trip to India in Jan - do people routinely get sick there like before? I was there a decade ago and had a terrible bout of something, was wondering if things had changed. 14 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:52 PM Flag
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[ Removed by moderator ] [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:54 PM Flag
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nothing has changed. food poisoning is rampant [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:06 PM Flag
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if you eat only at five star hotels like ritz carlton you are ok. deviate and u might get sick [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:07 PM Flag
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BIL just went there. Got stomach bug and got on antibiotics (which he brought) then got a terrible painful skin peeling sunburn bc of the antibiotics. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:58 PM Flag
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Crap. I LOVE that country but my stomach was f-ed up for six months after I got back. Plus I have to go to China beforehand. Maybe I'll lose the last 10 lbs I need to. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:00 PM Flag
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oh, yes. even people who are natives but have been living in the US for some years get horribly sick. i have never met anyone who didn't get some kind of stomach issues while visiting india. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:03 PM Flag
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Do you have any advice to stave it off? I already take a probiotic, and I took pepto tablets every morning when I was there. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:10 PM Flag
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short of eating everything at a western hotel, i don't see how you could do better than what you did. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:29 PM Flag
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Almost everyone I know (even those originally from India) who travel to India came back sick. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:36 PM Flag
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This. The average IQ is so low in India that society can not enforce basic food safety laws [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:04 PM Flag
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it has to be more than that because africa has an even lower IQ and it's less prone to the travel bug. i think it's just the horrible overcrowding. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:28 PM Flag
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I agree with you - India has terrible over crowding and very low IQ. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:56 PM Flag
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Perhaps I've been lucky but I've been to India 3x - have never gotten sick. Usual rules - only steaming hot food, high end restaurants where turnover is good etc [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:52 PM Flag
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we ate only at the business meeting and hotel and the one night my coworkers too me out, I managed to eat little or nothing and then ate a power bar later that night [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:57 PM Flag
[ - ] Just moved to the US and my kids are telling me other kids at school are brining hot food to school. What brand containers are good for keeping the food hot (warm?) until lunchtime? We had Thermos brand soup things that you fill with boiling water for 5 mins, then empty and put the food in, but they never really kept the food warm for long - are there better brands? 21 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:48 PM Flag
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Thermos is it [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:37 PM Flag
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This [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:54 PM Flag
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Thermos has improved. Go to Target and look. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:50 PM Flag
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Thanks. Mine is probably about 7 years old now. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:19 PM Flag
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then you just weren't using them correctly. you should put the food into the thermos piping hot. it will then be pretty pleasantly warm when you open it at lunch time. BUT sometimes it's hard to get the cap right when things are too piping hot or cold. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:18 PM Flag
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Stanley; Coleman brand [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:40 PM Flag
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get the metal kind from thermos. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:40 PM Flag
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get the metal kind from thermos. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:40 PM Flag
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It's the best brand and if you do prep with hot water the food is worm IME [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:41 PM Flag
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Foogo Thermos (10 oz) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:44 PM Flag
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Pack sandwiches, veggies, and fruit cups. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:11 PM Flag
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i agee with this. the hot food might be once in a while, but the staple will be sandwiches. they can always get cafeteria ration. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:04 PM Flag
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Glad to hear these are still the norm over here. From what the kids are telling me, it seems everyone else is brining full meals to school! I love the simplicity of sambos and fruit :-) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:20 PM Flag
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no, they are exaggerating. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:30 PM Flag
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I think so, too. Lots of kids just bring sandwiches. One of mine occasionally likes ramen in a thermos. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:26 PM Flag
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it is bizarre how kiddos like ramen noodles. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:56 PM Flag
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mine would eat it every day. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 03:01 PM Flag
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If only dd would eat sandwiches. She usually has rice and black beans, chicken and rice, chili or soup in a thermos with veggies, etc. on the side. If I could get her to eat sandwiches I would be thrilled. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:19 PM Flag
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These are great. Nothing will keep food scalding but it will keep it warm: http://www.thermos.com/products/blue-circles-foogo-vacuum-insulated-food-jar.aspx [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:57 PM Flag
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Check out Omiebox on kickstarter! They go in production soon. Otherwise, thermos but add hot water to the container to warm it up first. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 03:13 PM Flag
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omg you again [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 03:07 PM Flag
[ - ] Anyone have the inside scoop on the Hun School teacher arrested for having sex with a student? 8 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:44 PM Flag
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What is Hun school? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:45 PM Flag
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Safety school if you don't get into Lawrenceville near Princeton [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:54 PM Flag
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Actually a decent number of kids from the Hun School go to Princeton [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:07 PM Flag
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Princeton Day school too. Do they except commuters at a higher rate [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:10 PM Flag
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Since no one went to Harvard yale or brown? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:14 PM Flag
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Or penn. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:14 PM Flag
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[ Removed by moderator ] [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:58 PM Flag
[ - ] So what happened to the Spence girls who were drug dealing and expelled? 2 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:31 PM Flag
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So last year [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:31 PM Flag
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np. I was wondering as well. Did they go to college? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:40 PM Flag
[ - ] Had a really disturbing dream last night. Was trying to kill DH (he was laying there, willingly) by smashing his face against the wall. When he didn't die (stood up, just fine, no evidence of face smashing) I realized I had to divorce him to get away, and he agreed. The rest of the dream I was crying endlessly, trying to reconcile this decision. The most screwed up thing? I've never even been CLOSE to this angry or wanting to divorce DH. 12 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:26 PM Flag
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Don't share with dh [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:27 PM Flag
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+1. Never never. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:31 PM Flag
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this [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:52 PM Flag
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Wonder if it was a premonition.. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:30 PM Flag
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Dreams are not literal. Subconsciously you are working out something. What might that be? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:32 PM Flag
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This. It probably has nothing to do with her husband. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:38 PM Flag
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this might seem ocd, but how did you smash his face against the wall as he was lying on the floor? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:54 PM Flag
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It was a dream. Are your dreams logical? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:57 PM Flag
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that's why i said it was ocd but i am sort of anal about these things. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:05 PM Flag
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So I am asking to you, as someone who has OCD, have logical dreams? Just curious if OCD extends to unconscious thoughts. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 03:23 PM Flag
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Too much UB [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:44 PM Flag
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are you on medications? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 04:03 PM Flag
[ - ] Where is Townsend Harris high school? 2 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:22 PM Flag
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Queens [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:27 PM Flag
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Thank you [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:28 PM Flag
[ - ] I have a feeling that most WOHMs on UB buy cooked food from whole foods or order out or have dh cooking dinners. Is this the case? 51 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:08 PM Flag
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i wahm and used to buy the cooked food at WF when DC was smaller. but now, they have raised the prices so much lately, it's ridiculous. i just use a pressure cooker these days and have a couple go-to recurring meals that i cook at home from scratch. i still sometimes get latkes or a roasted chicken there but that's about it. i also don't like the fact that they add wheat and soy to most of their cooked foods so those are additional dealbreakers on top of the ridiculous prices. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:15 PM Flag
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I think I would have a much easier time with the cooking if I WAH. Perhaps I should get a slow cooker too. I just don't get how most WOHMs handle all the food while nannies don't seem to be expected to cook anything more complicated than boiling pasta. What are the kids eating? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:19 PM Flag
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or: i don't cook during my "work hours" - i cook in the evenings when dc is in bed. a pressure cooker is really great - you just throw stuff in it and 10 to 50 minutes later food is done. i pre-cook for the next day's lunch and dinner. i use frozen UDI pizzas for DC, i try to feed DC a good amount of fruit, he loves cheese and tuna salad, a croissant one in a while. i make fresh pancakes in the morning (takes me 12 minutes). i think it boiled down to a carefully selected list of dishes that don't require too many steps and ingredients. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:12 PM Flag
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By fresh pancakes do you mean from a mix? Can you give me some ideas for lunches you pre-cook? So your nanny just reheats what you pre-cooked? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:27 PM Flag
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i don't have a nanny. see above for food ideas. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:29 PM Flag
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opps, below not above [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:30 PM Flag
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TY! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:31 PM Flag
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or; i generally pack DH's lunches (sandwich, salads, soups, meats i cooked with a side of noodles, potatoes etc.), as well as DC's school lunch box. takes me 10 minutes in the mornings. leftovers are consumed, we love hotdogs, i make out-of-the-box garlic mashed potatoes, salad with different dressings, i bake pre-cut and seasoned sweet potato fries, i make pulled BBQ pork in the pressure cooker, sometimes i bake chicken wings at home. all those meals are quick because i use the pressure cooker or the oven. if i had to stand there over a pot and stir it for 45 minutes i'd never get anything done. my DH loves a freshly baked UDI baguette wit hbutter and salmon pate for dinner. i think "continental" type food makes it easier rather than full blown meals with x sides, and who knows what. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:28 PM Flag
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or: i get those organic pre-packaged bisques for DH at WH. he heats them up in a microwave at his job. i am big on fruit and nuts, so he gets those KIND bars for snack. also grew is a cheese and grapes with rice crackers lunch platter, simple red peppers with dressing on the side, the roasted chicken leftovers wit ha side of sweet potatoes that you can bake yourself in the oven. i sometimes make rice pasta with tomato sauce and thrown in some meat for the protein. out favorite pancake mix is by "pamela's" i WF carries it (it contains nuts but the pancakes are sooo yummy). [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:21 PM Flag
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That's a gross assumption. I WOH FT and still cook. We have takeout every once in a while, but it's not that hard to cook healthy dinners. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:07 PM Flag
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Who cooks lunches? What time do you get home from work? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:20 PM Flag
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I don't cook lunches. I said dinners (i.e. suppers). I get home at 6. Single mom, pick up dcs after work, get home, make dinner/get stuff ready for the next night if I have time. Not hard. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:32 PM Flag
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np No one cooks lunches. Sandwiches, veggie sticks, fruit, yogurt, cheese, etc. Takes about five minutes in the morning. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:33 PM Flag
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I have 3 kids of varies ages and one is still home. Cooking is time consuming and lunches take me much longer than 5 minutes [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:45 PM Flag
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Lol [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 04:20 PM Flag
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DH and I both often eat at work, or eat out for work. Nanny cooks DC's food. When we are home for dinner we eat whatever - leftovers, etc. (And there's a difference between the 9-5 WOH parent and the 8-7 WOH parent...) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:09 PM Flag
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What does your nanny cook for dcs? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:23 PM Flag
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Whatever. Not very adventurous, though. Everything from chicken nuggets & fries & veggies to teriyaki salmon/veggies & rice. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:19 PM Flag
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So you don't have kids at home. What did you do when kids where young? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:40 PM Flag
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DC are 4 and 6. This is what nanny cooks today. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:04 PM Flag
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I cook on the weekends and prep for the week. I make very simple meals during the week. I enjoy cooking so that helps. Lots of great 30 minute meal ideas out there. And meal planning helps a lot. The worst feeling is coming home to hungry people and having no idea what to make. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:22 PM Flag
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Are your kids at school for lunch? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:25 PM Flag
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My DC are old enough to make their own meals. One in college, one on his own. Both know how to cook. But they were packing/making lunch and dinners by MS. And DH did a lot of meal prep and cooking, too. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:20 PM Flag
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Out nanny cooks [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:28 PM Flag
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Does she mostly make pasta or does she make balanced meals? Is she cooking while with kids or does she cook while they are in school? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:29 PM Flag
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Balanced meals. She is truly great. Cooks for the family. DCs are preschool and early elementary so it's both. Best way to get older one to eat all veggies is to involve him a bit - whether in prep or his perception that he is choosing. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:39 PM Flag
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This sounds great. May I ask, what else does she do while kids are at school? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:38 PM Flag
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Weird assumption. Unless you were really wealthy, who could afford WF or takeout every night? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:23 PM Flag
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That's what I get by asking UBers about nanny responsibilities most say that cooking = boiling pasta or buying "healty" lunch so I would assume that means whole foods or the like. It actually does seem the wealthier one is the lower standards for food and nanny responsibilities get. Really odd [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:36 PM Flag
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Agree. I don't think income has to do with healthy eating after you get beyond poverty level. Most people I know who cook are just healthy (nothing to do with income) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:17 PM Flag
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I don't understand why anyone would eat take out every night unless they didn't mind being overweight. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:16 PM Flag
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i sah but almost always order out. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:56 PM Flag
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I WAH (kids are all in school), but with sports and activities, I need a quick meal many nights. So many options! 1) Season salmon, wrap in foil, stick in oven. Meanwhile, make salad or frozen veggies, maybe rice or quinoa. 2) Make a roast chicken on a Sunday, any leftovers can be quick quesadillas the next night. Or buy a roast chicken at a supermarket on the way home. 3) Pasta with veggies, you could add slices of chicken sausage or frozen shrimp for protein if desired. 4) Make pulled bbq pork in the crockpot. Just throw it in before work. 5) Or make chicken with salsa and taco seasoning in the crockpot, shred and make chicken burritos/tacos. 6) On a weekend, bread and fry a lot of chicken cutlets. Portion and freeze. These can be reheated quickly and sliced over a salad, or made into a sandwich with toppings, or warmed up with sauce and cheese for chicken parm. 7) Buy refrigerated pizza dough and make homemade pizza. 8) Make meatloaf in a muffin tin, portion and freeze. When you don't have a lot of time in the evening, I admit you can't get too ambitious with recipes, but there's no need to waste money on takeout. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:44 PM Flag
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TY for great ideas [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:46 PM Flag
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Agreed, great and simple [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:22 PM Flag
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i am so thankful we have a little money so i don't have to do all you suggested. pull chicken? omg, how long does that take? just the cooking would be exhausting, what with work and kids, but then you have to clean it up, too. and really, that's the thing i hate the most about cooking -- grocery shopping and cooking. and you can't wait until the next day for the housekeeper to wash everything. it's gotta be done after dinner. kudos to you but i am tired just reading your post. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:09 PM Flag
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What does money have to do with anything? She had great ideas for those of us who like to cook. I can afford to outsource but I enjoy cooking and have gotten shopping down. And cleaning up is done by whoever didn't cook...meaning DH. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:03 PM Flag
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it doesn't totally have anything to do with it. but if we didn't have money, i'd have to cook even though it would exhaust me. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:44 PM Flag
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I am WOHM with a wonderful nanny who cooks a fair bit for the dcs. I make lunches in the evening and cook on weekends ahead for the week. We only order out on Friday. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:56 PM Flag
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If you precook for the week and make lunches then what is nanny cooking? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:47 PM Flag
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I do some precook. Nanny does alot of prepping (chopping veggies and fruit) and cooking dinners for dcs later in the week. Or I might leave chicken marinating and she will cook and make the sides. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:07 PM Flag
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WOHM and cook every weekend with slow cooker, etc. Generally make a pot of something like veggie chili or a Spanish omelet with a lot of greens for adult lunches, grill a lot of chicken, make a big pot of rice, cut up veggies for the week for lunches, steam broccoli, hard boil eggs. I always have frozen pizza dough in the freezer for make your own pizza. Some saturdays I'll make waffles for breakfast and triple the recipe so that I can freeze the rest for the week. Kids amazingly love steel cut oatmeal so we will do that during the winter. I also make my own granola. DH cleans up. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:07 PM Flag
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Need to remember oatmeal. I wonder if my child will eat it. Might be a good variety for weekends. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:16 PM Flag
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Dh and I both cook. We each have our "specialities." We go out every Friday night, but this is a holdover from when we were dating. When dcs were young and we didn't want to take them to a restaurant, we ordered in on Friday. If we both have busy weeks, we will order in another night. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:40 PM Flag
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Not me. I make some stuff on weekends to heat and serve and make a lot of simple meals as well (e.g. pasta with meat sauce & steamed broccoli). I make and pack lunches the night before. I've got a ton of ramekin recipes that I keep in the freezer to heat and serve (single servings of chilis and soups, Shepard's pies, mini lasagnas, chicken pot pies, etc.). I do buy the occasional rotisserie chicken from Citarella b/c I can make dinner and lunch out of it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:29 PM Flag
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^^I don't cook for dh during the week b/c he eats very late after he works out so its just me & dcs [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:30 PM Flag
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No, not in my case. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:55 PM Flag
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I WOHM and I cook most nights. It isn't hard and takes about 30-45 minutes. I also prepare lunch on a daily basis. I only have one child so that might make a difference. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:11 PM Flag
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i don't know about most. i WOH and cook about 4x/week, other nights are take out, going out, or leftovers. if my husband cooked i'd faint form the shock. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:00 PM Flag
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Hi Conde Nast! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:53 PM Flag
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My nanny cooks for the kids and it's definitely real meals and not just pasta all the time - she makes chicken/fish/meat and a vegetable and then some kind of starch. If it's just me (dh travels a lot), there's usually enough of the meat for me too and i just throw together a salad or some veggies to go with it. we get take out too - chinese or pizza if there's a lot going on with activities in the afternoon. dh likes to cook when he has time and we usually have leftovers to cover at least 1-2 more meals. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 04:49 PM Flag
[ - ] Divorced mom, dating a great guy. The last date we did everything "but," and -- at least in my mind -- this next date would definitely include sex. As luck would have it, i got my period which is pretty much over today, date is tomorrow night. should i just put in a diaphragm to contain any unexpected drops, or should i explain the circumstances and see if he'd rather hold off? would he know if i said nothing? 5 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 11:55 AM Flag
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Don't mention it. Instant mood killer. Just do it. He's a grown up. A drop of blood never hurt anyone. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:19 PM Flag
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In addition to diaphragm, you are using condoms right? I am divorced and I can assure you, you want to use a condom. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:08 PM Flag
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Absolutely, yes, using condoms. I wasn't going to mention having the diaphragm in, but was curious if he'd be able to tell and wonder why i had it in if i insist on condoms. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 05:42 PM Flag
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np: diaphragm is primarily birth control. condoms are anti-STD and back up birth control. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 05:40 PM Flag
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I would NOT explain the circumstances, sorry. If it were me I would cancel the date/say something came up with work and reschedule for a later time. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:58 PM Flag
[ - ] How many of you have helped you MS/HS dc with homework just to get it over with? I don't mean do it for them but really assisted just so they could get some sleep? 201 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 11:27 AM Flag
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I have helped them just so they don't turn in crap because they are tired and are planning to just phone it in and see what happens. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 11:28 AM Flag
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What does phone it in mean? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 11:18 AM Flag
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The kid puts something down on paper so he can say he's done. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 11:21 AM Flag
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So you do it for them. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:06 PM Flag
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wow, you've never heard that expression before? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 09:54 PM Flag
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Why not let them see what happens? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 11:56 AM Flag
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In 7th grade NYC we can't. The consequences don't fit the crime. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:16 PM Flag
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What would be the consequences of turning in a bad/incorrect/incomplete homework assignment? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:24 PM Flag
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7th grades grades are used for high school acceptance [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:14 PM Flag
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And you think one bad night of homework is going to end an academic career? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:34 PM Flag
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Are you looking for an argument this morning? I answered the question and explained my answer when you asked. Don't be a pita [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:24 PM Flag
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I am OR and had to step out to drive kids to school. Yes, as far as I am concerned it is a family effort. I can't help much with math or science, but over my dead body will I let them submit a lazy paper, even if I have to wake up early and edit it myself so that at least their draft is tighter. They are on their own with their thesis and thoughts. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:55 PM Flag
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+1mm. More parents in private do this than don't. If they are saying they don't they then have a tutor. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:03 PM Flag
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WOW. So this is what my kid who does her own homework is up against. A bitchy, overprotective 40 something. WOW. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:21 PM Flag
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Issues much? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:36 PM Flag
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I don't think I was bitchy at all? Did I miss where I attacked anyone? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:56 PM Flag
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You didn't and you weren't bitchy. Responder has issues. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 03:04 PM Flag
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Agree. Responder can't or won't help and wants the world to do it her way. Ignore [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 05:06 PM Flag
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This. My kids got awful hw grades bc they hated doing homework and I never held it against them. Their only problem was having a mother who refused to do it. I take very few "top students" credentials seriously. Their parents are doing a good chunk of the work. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:08 PM Flag
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No wonder these kids have such a hard time in college. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 06:18 PM Flag
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No, they send it home to be done then too. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:08 PM Flag
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werd [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:57 PM Flag
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You're overdramatizing. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:24 PM Flag
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THIS. She is 100% correct. It ALL matters. The stakes are high. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:49 PM Flag
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Are you serious? I never do this for my kid and she's at a SHS... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:22 PM Flag
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Specialized high schools don't use any of this. Try hard to imagine not every child wants a SHS [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:25 PM Flag
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Are you serious? I never do this for my kid and she's at a SHS... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:22 PM Flag
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Are you serious? I never do this for my kid and she's at a SHS... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:22 PM Flag
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These people have somewhat loser kids and they're trying to compensate. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:08 PM Flag
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No but several bad nights of homework can if its graded and if your doing HW completely and correctly, you'll do better on tests. Most tests are on material that was given for HW. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 09:58 PM Flag
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+1000000 The stakes are so high, it's scary. There should be a room for a 7th grader to make mistakes. The current NYC high schools admissions process is too brutal and unforgiving. It feels that SHSAT is the only one that gives you a clean slate, and looks like BdB will take it away in the name of fairness. It's way too stressful. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 04:15 PM Flag
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THIS THIS THIS. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:49 PM Flag
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YES YOU CAN and you should. Land the helicopter. NOW. Signed, parent of an 8th grader. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:08 PM Flag
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You raise yours. I'll raise mine. The differences are what make life interesting. Our children all have strengths and weaknesses. Some more freedom and support than others. I'm pretty sure there is a topic or decision you make that differs greatly from how I would handle. I'd never dream of insinuating you are doing something wrong (especially not knowing your child) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:28 PM Flag
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ILY but you sound way too logical for this board. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:37 PM Flag
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On that note, I'm signing off thanks! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:31 PM Flag
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You have weak kids. It's ok to admit it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:09 PM Flag
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I think 8th grade is the perfect time for letting go. Agree, NYC public parents need to stay on top of 7th [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:29 PM Flag
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Let me guess he is 14 going on 15 in 8th grade. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:36 PM Flag
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Right? My dc is 12 in 8th grade [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:32 PM Flag
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Guess that's why she needs the extra help. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 03:34 PM Flag
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Guess that's why one size doesn't fit all [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 05:08 PM Flag
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Well, SN is a different story. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:09 PM Flag
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I help. I'll type while they dictate and I definitely drill and kill. Early MS not HS. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 11:31 AM Flag
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Ewww [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:09 PM Flag
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Why wwwww? Early MS is 11 years old. They still need some assistance getting organized and doing practice tests. At least mine do. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.17.14, 11:53 AM Flag
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In middle school, especially 6th, I helped with organization, i.e. sorting out the assignments and helping DS organize his time. He eventually got the hang of it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 11:35 AM Flag
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Yes, help organizing, supporting, brain storming for projects, proofreading, etc. DH and I get involved in projects, not much with nightly HW. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 11:43 AM Flag
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I have never helped, and sometimes it showed. Friends' projects were better, etc. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 11:33 AM Flag
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Teachers know. Don't think they don't. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:10 PM Flag
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I'll help quiz them with flashcards or lists if they want me to but that's getting very rare. They usually just go in their rooms and get it done. My HSer never wants my help. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 11:36 AM Flag
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+1. I help quiz MSer [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 11:53 AM Flag
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No. We quiz or proofread, but if DDs are regularly losing sleep or not getting homework done, we look at organization and cut other activities. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:13 PM Flag
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We do one sport, church. Nothing to cut and dc is an excellent student. Can't imagine how hard it is for a child who struggles academically. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:08 PM Flag
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Church is not a sport. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:22 PM Flag
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It's an activity brainiac [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:30 PM Flag
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Bad punctuation then. The way it reads is that they do a sport, which is church. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 06:08 PM Flag
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On assignments where no learning is taking place - just busy work or stupid make a poster - I see NO problem with this [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:15 PM Flag
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That's true. I would occasionally help with an art project--like the stupid mosaic from torn paper. DC did all the conceptual/design work, but the cutting out of 1000 tiny pieces of paper--eh, that had no educational value. Took ages. I will also quiz language, i.e. verb conjugations. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:59 PM Flag
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Amen! The busy work kills me. My view is if they aren't going to need this in life I don't care how it gets done. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:52 PM Flag
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Why is this your issue? Then you end up doing busy work? That makes NO sense. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:23 PM Flag
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NP makes sense to me. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:31 PM Flag
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This. They think it's reasonable to do their dcs "worthless" homework because it's too boring for their kids to do. These women have a LOT of time on their hands. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:28 PM Flag
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No they don't. I know plenty a parent who walks through the door at 7:00pm and is then helping out with hw or gets up super early to do it. It's an epidemic. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 10:01 PM Flag
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Because she can probably do it in ten minutes and it would take three hours for a kid. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 10:00 PM Flag
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Totally agree. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:31 PM Flag
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And there are no real life jobs out there that are free of busy work... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 06:08 PM Flag
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Well sneaux is too speshul and gifted to do such petty menial stuff. And from their parents basement, they won't have to! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:29 PM Flag
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Of course you don't, snowflake. I'm sure you don't see a problem with the occasional cheat sheet either. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:27 PM Flag
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Helping your child study for a test, understand a math problem, or brainstorm a story line is quite, quite different from a cheat sheet. Project much? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 10:14 PM Flag
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I cut them off after about an hour/night, and they just turn it in completed or not. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:03 PM Flag
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Public or private? What grade? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:15 PM Flag
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Dd gets 90-120 min of HW a night at TT. No way to cut off at 1 hr. School said expect 2 hrs a night. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:28 PM Flag
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NP I think this is wrong [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:31 PM Flag
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Kids who play a sport have no time to just hang out anymore. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:34 PM Flag
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THIS!!!!!!!!! And they should. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:50 PM Flag
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They will just play Minecraft or watch YouTube videos anyway. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:56 PM Flag
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Yours might. Mine wouldn't. My point is downtime and family time are important parts of life. Mindless homework, not so much [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:58 PM Flag
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The homework our daughters get is not mindless. If your kids are just getting busywork, you should talk to the teacher about giving more substantive assignments. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:42 PM Flag
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You handle it your way, I'll handle it my way. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:10 PM Flag
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Someone has to teach gym....carry on. :) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:29 PM Flag
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I cannot imagine the terror that would rule my life if I thought the only options were dedicating every waking moment to schoolwork, or teaching gym. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:24 PM Flag
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Who devotes every waking moment to either of these? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 10:19 PM Flag
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Mine either but they play sports and instruments. Most kids will lie around. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:51 PM Flag
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There is nothing wrong with lying around. With your thoughts, daydreaming etc. it's important and children should do it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 05:09 PM Flag
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This is the shortsighted attitude which drives the homework train. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:59 PM Flag
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It sure is. Her kid is probably red shirted and goes to math camp on weekends. MITiger Mom. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:07 PM Flag
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THIS. It's horrible what is going on. How will they have time for creativity and daydreaming. Then you will get a call that Johnny was daydreaming in class. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:06 PM Flag
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THIS. Also at a TT and hw is 2+. I cut off at 4 hours on bad nights. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:53 PM Flag
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I proof papers and check all math. If they miss something I'm perfectly capable of teaching them what they obviously didnt learn in class. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:05 PM Flag
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This. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:38 PM Flag
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+1 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:07 PM Flag
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DD is in private; that's why I pay a tutor. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:06 PM Flag
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Mine are all in private too but I don't believe in tutors. I sometimes feel it unfair when my ds gets a B+ that I know would be an A if he were tutored. My hope is that the teacher knows who does the real work. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:56 PM Flag
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They do. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:10 PM Flag
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I type. Schools want typed assignments but neglect to teach typing [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:14 PM Flag
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How old are your children? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:35 PM Flag
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MS [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:25 PM Flag
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np. Other parents would give me strange looks on all the middle school tours, but this is one question I always asked. Since they required documents in Word or Powerpoint, did they teach keyboarding? One school was so proud of their iMacs in every classroom, but it turns out that they didn't intend to teach the kids how to use them. What a waste! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:34 PM Flag
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Beyond. Ridiculous. Every 6th grade student HAD to take computer ("media") and she didn't bother to teach them how to type (keyboard). [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:39 PM Flag
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In our TT, they started learning how to type on the keyboard in 3rd or 4th grade. There will be more and more typing. Your DC should do it. Otherwise s/he will get more and more in trouble. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:04 PM Flag
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There is no time. Glad some schools are teaching. Our elementary stopped with the excuse everything will be voice for them @@ [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:54 PM Flag
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What is she going to do in HS? HW will be massive and they should be all typed. The tests like English and History will require typed answers, like essays, within limited time. The more she types, the faster she will be able to type. Can she practice typing on weekends? There are very helpful and fun computer games for typing. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:13 PM Flag
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Will have to take a course during the summer. There is no time during the week with homework and sports [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:05 PM Flag
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Just 10 or 20 minutes a day may be enough. They're computer games. It is fun and relaxing. It's a skill that need to be developed everyday, not just one big summer course. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:20 PM Flag
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LOL. They aren't difficult. This is one skill that she will only learn by doing over and over. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:32 PM Flag
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Then, who don't you let her do it over and over by doing her HW like everyone else? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:33 PM Flag
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Homework should never be MASSIVE. What is wrong with people today? I'll be glad when the pendulum swings back [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:06 PM Flag
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In TT HS, it's like college. The level of what's being taught and what's expected of students are almost like college. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:23 PM Flag
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It is not at all like college. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:14 PM Flag
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What do you mean? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:31 PM Flag
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Yes it is. At least when I was in college almost twenty years ago. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:10 PM Flag
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I agree - even these hybrid high schools/ college credit are not like college. Get real [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:15 PM Flag
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I think TT MS is like college. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:09 PM Flag
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+1 Five minutes with a youtube video will show them where their fingers go, and then typing their own work will give them all the practice they need. I bet they have no problem typing when they are surfing the internet. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:25 PM Flag
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Why would she? Kids are using keyboards before they use crayons these days. Typing is not rocket science. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:21 PM Flag
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That is a mistake. Crayons should come first [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:11 PM Flag
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My 4th grader learned to type last year. Public school. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:24 PM Flag
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What do you mean "teach keyboarding"? What kid doesn't know how a keyboard works? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:38 PM Flag
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she means to teach typing, ie, use a keyboard to type. Not just hunt and peck. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 09:58 PM Flag
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How have they grown up with computers and not learned to type their own work by MS? They don't need a typing course; they need to do their own work. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:21 PM Flag
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Hunting and pecking is not typing [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:12 PM Flag
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If you make them do their own work they will learn how to type. I never took a keyboarding class in my life. Just learned to type because I had to. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:39 PM Flag
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lol! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:23 PM Flag
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If you are so concerned, why not have her do an online keyboarding program? It's not very time-consuming. The only way she will master typing is if you stop doing it for her!! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:19 PM Flag
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+1 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:43 PM Flag
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I didn't say I was concerned. I answered a question about my degree of help. I type the papers. Take it or leave it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:16 PM Flag
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I meant concerned about the school not teaching typing. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:35 PM Flag
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THIS. Are you going to college with her? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:12 PM Flag
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You do understand that helping a 10-11 yo MS type is different from helping a HS kid type. They have a lot more stamina as they age and need a lot less sleep. This entire post is about helping out when it's too much and you know they need sleep. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.17.14, 11:57 AM Flag
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You don't need to be taught typing. You learn how to type by doing it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:25 PM Flag
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THANK YOU!!! Our SS "TT" even TESTS them on keyboarding yet they do not teach them to do it. Typing is a semester long class that you go to 4-5 days a week. Not a quickie "typing pal" program you have to do yourself. My dc was practicing keyboarding and I said "you don't have your fingers on the home row" and dc had no idea what I was talking about. It is very aggravating. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 09:57 PM Flag
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Homework load is ridiculous. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:22 PM Flag
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I usually ask the teachers if they want parents to correct or send in wrong. MOST of the time, they say "you can go ahead and correct" [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:30 PM Flag
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Not a good teacher imo. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:46 PM Flag
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I'm not talking one teacher - probably a dozen by now. Why wouldn't they want you to do it for them? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:36 PM Flag
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np If parents correct the homework, the teacher has no idea which students are not really getting it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:23 PM Flag
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Isn't the goal that the student learns? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:15 PM Flag
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And if the student is not learning, the teacher knows it from homework and quizzes. If all of the homework comes back 100%, the teacher doesn't know what was learned and what was missed, until it's too late. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:44 PM Flag
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It's not too late. The Information IS LEARNED. That night at home. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:13 PM Flag
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Not true. Only true if the parent simply corrects. I sit with them and show them what they got wrong and teach them how to do it correctly - especially with math. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:59 PM Flag
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Exactly. The goal is they learn it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:33 PM Flag
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They don't say this in middle school. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:12 PM Flag
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Yes they have! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:34 PM Flag
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Never. Ds is in middle school and is usually able to finish between 7 and 8PM. once in a while, he'll go until 8:30. I am a bit worried what HS will bring. He wants to go to specialized. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:31 PM Flag
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What time does he start? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:33 PM Flag
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7PM. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:36 PM Flag
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He starts at 7 and finishes at 7. I want your kid [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:40 PM Flag
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No, he starts at 7 and usually finishes within the hour. Some days he works for 5 minutes. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:07 PM Flag
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She definitely isn't tutoring him in math! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:00 PM Flag
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Lol [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:33 PM Flag
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What school? How old and is he redshirted? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:59 PM Flag
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All the time. If they have 10 words to look up in a dictionary and it will take them 45 minutes to look up and write down and it can be done in 10 with me dictating - 10 it is. We like our evenings together. School day is long enough [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:44 PM Flag
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I always wonder if we do that, are we doing a disservice? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:17 PM Flag
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No. I'm confident my kid knows the skill. No need to do it 100x after you master the skill. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:09 PM Flag
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If your child had the skill, it wouldn't take 45 minutes instead of 10... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:45 PM Flag
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+1 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:57 PM Flag
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Obviously your child hasn't mastered the skill ;) Last year my 2nd grader had that exact hw assignment once a week. In the beginning, it took him 45 min. Nobody helped. Guess what? He got faster. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 03:46 PM Flag
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Guess what - I do t value that as a good use of time. It's ok. We both get what we want. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 05:10 PM Flag
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How? The workload is insane. If your family is happier and has more time together how is this wrong. Like the above poster said they have to study and take the tests. That is what counts. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:13 PM Flag
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Agree. I'd be happy to see homework go away and base grade on tests (and papers). You know - like in college ;) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:35 PM Flag
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You are me. I don't do the studying since they have to take their own tests and do well. If I can speed it up that's our goal. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:00 PM Flag
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ALmost never. I'd like to prepare them for college. So, they have to hack it by themselves. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:17 PM Flag
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They don't have to make ALL ABOUT ME posters in college [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:16 PM Flag
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It's to teach them they have to do what they have to do. That's how life is. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:30 PM Flag
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People who make the most $$$ do less work. That's life. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:18 PM Flag
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NP [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:18 PM Flag
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Less work and/or $$$ are not what we're striving for. It all depends on what you live for, I guess. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:14 PM Flag
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THIS. God. These kids are going to be HELPLESS as adults. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:25 PM Flag
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No they aren't. I had 20 minutes of homework growing up and had/have a very full life. These kids are still doing 2-3 hours of hw and every extra curricular in the world. They won't be helpless but they will be severely burnt out and on anxiety meds by hs if this keeps up. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:29 PM Flag
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This [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:35 PM Flag
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Sorry to burst your bubble, but my DC is in an Ivy college and is an honor student. Not taking any meds so far and doesn't seem to need it in the foreseeable future. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:52 PM Flag
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Guess he didn't get his reading comp. skills from you. No one has a bubble being burst. This is a collective conversation about the overload of work and stress kids have. If your dc got out unscathed that is a great thing. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:47 PM Flag
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ILY! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:55 PM Flag
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Maybe I'm hallucinating. The threads seem to be about parents helping their kids HW... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 03:09 PM Flag
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No it's a thread asking parents if they have ever helped. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 10:20 PM Flag
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No they are going to have administrative assistants [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:35 PM Flag
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You have to know how to do it yourself so that you can tell them what to do and see if your assistants did it right and on time. When you know how to do it, you'll be able to choose smart assistants to work for you. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:46 PM Flag
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Np: I hate those things! In one section, my 3rd grade son wrote, "I can't think of anything" [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:58 PM Flag
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Love that. Good for him. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:29 PM Flag
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ILY - FTW! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:14 PM Flag
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The ILY FTW was for 'they don't have to make ALL ABOUT ME' posters in college but it ended up down the post. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:30 PM Flag
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I am really surprised how many parents do all the typing for older kids. My DS just started 3rd grade. He had a few writing assignments to do over the summer based on the two books he had to read. It added up to a fair amount of writing. They could be handwritten or type, but he chose to type since his handwriting is messy. I never, ever thought of doing the typing for him. It just did not occur to me. Yes, it took a LONG time for him to peck out all that work, but he'll never be motivated to learn to type if he assumes Mom will do all the drudge work for him. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 03:28 PM Flag
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he can't learn to type by pecking keys with two fingers. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 04:22 PM Flag
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This. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 05:12 PM Flag
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OR: I agree with that. But I imagine the tedium of hunting and pecking will be a good motivation to learn how to type for real. Instead of Mommy just making the hard parts magically go away :) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 05:17 PM Flag
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I learned to type without ever taking a class. You start out pecking, but it's not like you stay that way. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:28 PM Flag
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+1 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.17.14, 12:29 AM Flag
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95% of the I do not help. The 5% of the time where the assignment is just over the top I have gotten hands on. This is for ds in MS. When younger sister got wind of my assistance she was up and arms and claimed her brother would end up a 'basement baby' (adult living in mom's basement) and on and on. She's in 4th and has only asked for help for putting together poster boards for science fairs, or those ridiculous 100 days 100 items posters. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 03:55 PM Flag
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It's easier for girls. You can tell a girl poster/project from a boy one a mile away. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 05:13 PM Flag
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THIS. Sad but true. Signed mom of boys. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:09 PM Flag
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np: and we go to an all boys school, and you can tell a poster a boy actually did from one a parent did a mile away. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 09:48 PM Flag
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SO THIS! I don't help my ds and it's always the worst poster or essay in the room. Gosh I hope the teacher knows. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.17.14, 12:00 PM Flag
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How does a fourth grader know about grown men living in their parents basements? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:09 PM Flag
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She got that reference from a cartoon. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 08:14 PM Flag
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DS is in HS now, but a lot of what I did, early in middle school, was just be there. He would say "I don't get this!" and I would say "Do you want me to take a look?" And he'd say yes, but then as he was about to show it to me, he'd get an idea and figure it out. So I felt as if I was his muse. By pretending to help, it gave him confidence to figure it out. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 10:29 PM Flag
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"His muse"? Interesting choice of words. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 11:47 PM Flag
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No. Never. 5 kids and never. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 11:59 PM Flag
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So the older ones helped the younger ones. That or the homework helper or nanny. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.17.14, 12:02 AM Flag
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I'll proof read papers for my HS DCs but that's about it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.17.14, 03:07 AM Flag
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Agree but HS is very different and they are old enough and have enough stamina to do 3-5 hours of hw. At 10-12 they should NOT be doing 2-3 hours of hw a night. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.17.14, 12:14 PM Flag
[ - ] Divorced mom with 2 teen dds. I have primary custody of both girls and have since they were little. But now I am at war with older dd. I do very well with younger dd when older is not around - otherwise our household is nonstop strife. I have been debating asking ex dh to take older dd. Not sure he would do it. Anyone btdt or heard of a situation like this? 22 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 11:25 AM Flag
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The good news is younger dd is learning what not to do. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 11:47 AM Flag
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Describe "war" with older dd. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 11:48 AM Flag
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She refuses to do anything I ask her to do. Rages, tantrums. Gets into physical (light) stuff with her sister that I have to shut down. To be fair, younger dd gives right back and I have had to shut that down too. House always feels in crisis. And it impacts school. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:10 PM Flag
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Thanks for replying. This kind of "war" is really common with teens. I have it with my teen dd and I'm married so no ex to ship her off too ;). I sympathize. But what she's going through is common adolescence and sending her to live elsewhere won't fix it. You and she need to work it through. Can you talk to a counselor (with her, if she'll do it) about how to communicate better? How you want her to behave, what she wants from you (I'm sure she has plenty of complaints, they all do!) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:17 PM Flag
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How about scheduling a sit-down with them both and then one on ones, to talk things over, and be sure to do more listening than talking? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:32 PM Flag
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If she wont open up, just talk calmly about how you feel about yhe wsy things are, how much you love them, and would love to listen to ideas for change. That life isn't often ideal, but you are in this together and should be helping each other, not fighting. Maybe you could offer one of your own ideas for something you could change about yourself, to start. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:24 PM Flag
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Does he live in the same school district? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 11:48 AM Flag
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Man, school is just IT with you people isn't it? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 11:46 AM Flag
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Np valid question for a high schooler. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 11:51 AM Flag
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+1 Moving in with her father to change things up is fine, but making her change schools might not be great. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:08 PM Flag
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DD goes to high school in a separate boro from me and from ex dh [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:07 PM Flag
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I haven't and I'm sorry it's so hard but take some time to think about the path an already troubled teen might take if she felt rejected by her mom. How many years until college? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 11:49 AM Flag
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OP. 4 - and I am not sure she will make it to college [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:07 PM Flag
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Teens can be tough. You don't want to give the impression that you are tossing her away. If you have a good relationship with your Ex and you think your DD will respond better to him, sure. But if you are sending her to an unsupervised living situation just to make your life easier, no. I've seen this happen with my DD's friends and her behavior will only get worse. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 11:42 AM Flag
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He is definitely looser - not unsupervised however. But she has a good rapport with him. I hate to say it, but I definitely have an affinity with younger - he has with older. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 11:56 AM Flag
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The change might relieve the pressure. I would try to have an honest, mature discussion with her. That might be hard to do but if she can feel that the decision is made jointly and without anger, it could be a good thing. I would do everything I could to have lots of positive contact with her. Don't let her think you abandoned her. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:04 PM Flag
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I was at war with my mom and sometimes dreamed of running away or living with my dad, but I would have been devastated if she had initiated that. What I really wanted was love and attention from my mom. I was angry at the world, and afraid, and my mother responded with harshness, grounding me, calling me an ingrate, etc. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 11:50 AM Flag
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You are me. I promised myself I would treat my DD differently. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:17 PM Flag
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+me same experience [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 01:07 PM Flag
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+1 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 02:26 PM Flag
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Has she asked? If so it is fair to explore. Otherwise she will be even more pissed off. She might really be hurting, it is hard being a teen and even when divorce is best for he family, it can still be hard to process when you are a teen. You don't want to be the first to suggest it or she will feel like you have given up on her. Also do not suggest unless you and ex dh have agreed he will take her on if that is what she chooses. So you need to talk to ex dh before even raising with teen. Sounds counter-intuitive but firm discipline must be paired with over the top love and patience to help teen with her behavior. It is hard but dig deep. Btw I have been there so this is my advice from experience. Gl [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.16.14, 12:54 PM Flag
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