• Filter the conversation
[ - ] At what age do looks fade? When do women stop looking hot? 30 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:34 PM Flag
»
i'm 35 and i recently had db #2 and feel like they have plummeted (with dc #1 at age 30 i think i bounced back nicely) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:36 PM Flag
»
Depends enormously on the effort put in. My face started changing at 33 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:36 PM Flag
»
I feel like mid 40s is when looks take a nosedive. Tho some are luckier than other. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:37 PM Flag
»
+1 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:42 PM Flag
»
+1 I definitely looked older but not too bad until about 43. Now 47 and not happy with the way things have gone. Oh well. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:56 PM Flag
»
Yup me too -- was just thinking this recently. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 04:42 PM Flag
»
I'd say late 30's. Then the weird botox stuff starts and women look even weirder. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:41 PM Flag
»
This. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 05:22 PM Flag
»
I've seen beautiful women in their 50s and 60s. But beautiful is not the same as hot. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:44 PM Flag
»
True. Beautiful women can stay beautiful. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 05:23 PM Flag
»
Yep, hot means fertile and no matter what women in their 50s or 60s do, they won't look like they are in their 20s or 30s. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 05:27 PM Flag
»
i stayed good until about 43. slight forehead wrinkles around 45, more and more gray, skin tone more sallow ...Now 47. now its really changing. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:56 PM Flag
»
Depends on whether you have kids. Pregnancy can destroy you. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:56 PM Flag
»
This. Sleep deprivation and lack of time for self-maintenance just adds to it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 05:28 PM Flag
»
My 30s/having kids was not kind to me. I look at pics from a decade ago and I look like I was 16... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:58 PM Flag
»
Same here, my looks took nosedive in my mid 30s and my weight did the opposite, LOL. In my 40s I started to take better care of myself, lost the weight and got some botox/fillers and I am way more attractive ironically than a decade ago. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 05:29 PM Flag
»
I am 37 and doing ok but have noticed some changes for sure. I had DCs very young so didn’t have to deal with pregnancy weight etc in my 30s. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 04:03 PM Flag
»
start to fade-22 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 04:06 PM Flag
»
I see a huge change in early 50's [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 04:08 PM Flag
»
I became invisible at 45 -- could just tell when I walked into a room that nobody cared. Went from f**kable to well-preserved over night. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 04:22 PM Flag
»
+1 I had a baby at 42 and it zapped whatever renaining youth I had. I went from pretty and fertile to barren. No more fruit on this tree. With the right conditions I can still manage a bloom now and then. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 04:31 PM Flag
»
True, but who looks at old men either. Very few older men who look good. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 05:24 PM Flag
»
exactly [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 05:45 PM Flag
»
OR: True, but 45 wouldn't even register as older for them. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 06:51 PM Flag
»
Ugh. Stop. Men get old too. Look at all the ugly old farts in the news harassing young women. These women don't want to be with these assholes. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 05:22 PM Flag
»
Depends on the woman of course but in general, late 30s/early 40s. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 05:23 PM Flag
»
When they stop taking care of their looks, it can happen in early 20s too. A 50 year old in great shape with the right amount of fillers and/or mid face lift, who had taken great care of her skin and hair looks better IMHO than an overweight 20-something girl with greasy mousy hair and bad skin. And it can be the same dumpy 20-something girl nobody noticed who turns into a beautiful, fit and well maintained 40-something. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 05:34 PM Flag
»
so true! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 05:45 PM Flag
»
There's more than one drop-off point. Most women peak in late 20s/early 30s. First big drop is around 35. Second major drop late 40s/early 50s. But genetics plays a huge part. Some women are just okay looking when younger but they never have that big drop-off so they end up looking a lot better when they're older (by comparison), especially if they don't gain weight. Some women are ranked high when young but fall apart early. The woman who keeps her natural beauty is pretty rare. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 05:43 PM Flag
»
When they run out of money. At certain age beauty comes from your wallet even if you used to be a professional model. This age usually is around late 30 early 40s for most women with a few exceptions. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 09:37 PM Flag
[ - ] chances of getting into NEST High school with a 97 average, 3 in ELA and 4 in Math.. not sure where to rank it 12 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:33 PM Flag
»
You rank it however you like. If it's your first choice, rank it first, no matter your chances. There is no gamesmenship. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:35 PM Flag
»
I just get worried bc if everyone ranks it first and I rank it second, DD chances are less.. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:41 PM Flag
»
np - the way nest ranks her is not affected by her ranking - so it's less likely she will end up there, but only because she's more likely to end up at #1, not because she's ranked lower by nest. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:49 PM Flag
»
That scenario only works if the people who rank it first have better stats than your dd. the schools have NO idea how any child ranks them. So in your situation, 150-200 kids with better test scores and grades would have to rank NEST first. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:49 PM Flag
»
Only if they have higher scores and grades than dd. If dd's are higher and she ranks it second, she bumps a lower ranked person from 1st choice if she doesn't get her first choice. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:52 PM Flag
»
I think very high. What did you think of it? I liked it more than dd. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:41 PM Flag
»
np. Same here. Ds didn't like it as much as I did. Don't know why. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:52 PM Flag
»
we went to the open house that was led by new(ish) science and math AP who seemed like a very nice woman but was completely inarticulate. The tour was basically a walk through the hallway - all the classes were locked up and the library was off limits due to a staff meeting. I think the high school is absolutely solid academically but there was nothing for a 13 year old to get excited about. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 04:01 PM Flag
»
My kids are at the k-5. What are some pros and cons of the hs? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 04:03 PM Flag
»
3. what? 4. what? I think your chances should be pretty good regardless. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:58 PM Flag
»
right. A 3.8 is different than a 3.1 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 04:04 PM Flag
»
Is 97 dc's core average? The chances are good. Do you plan on ranking it first? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 04:01 PM Flag
[ - ] Allergy moms: are gingerbread houses (sold in stores) nut free? Was planning on doing this for kids entertainment tomorrow and one of our guests may be allergic to nuts 9 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:32 PM Flag
»
Even if it is nut free there is no way to guarantee there was no cross contamination. It would be safer to pick an activity that did not involve food. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:34 PM Flag
»
You're too kind. I would uninvited the invalid. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 04:23 PM Flag
»
Op: nothing in the ingredient list sounds like nuts to me, but I know sometimes these names can be deceiving (for someone not used to reading the labels) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:34 PM Flag
»
Read the package. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:34 PM Flag
»
This! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 04:06 PM Flag
»
the ones by wilton which are sold at michaels and acmoore are nut free, but I believe are made in a facility that processes nuts. some families dont mind if same facility and others do [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:34 PM Flag
»
I do not have the answer to this, but you might try calling Whole Foods and seeing if they carry this. Seems like something they would have. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:34 PM Flag
»
the one time my kid had a reaction in school was during a gingerbread house project (it was mild, but she was definitely reacting). I would err on the side of picking a different activity unless the kit is labelled with potential allergens and nuts aren't listed. if no label, I would not do this project. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:36 PM Flag
»
Call the mom and ask her. We do these every year with a child who is allergic to nuts, but the mom doesn't worry about the "made in a plant that processes nuts" stuff. Some moms have to worry about it. We also have made them with graham crackers for the gingerbread walls and roof and frosting and that works too, also nut free. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:37 PM Flag
[ - ] What are your plans for Thanksgiving? Me- parade, party, party. 13 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:30 PM Flag
»
Turkey trot then dinner [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:30 PM Flag
»
eat eat eat, meet up with friends at our local bar [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:33 PM Flag
»
lazy morning going to inlaws for 1 pm, eat too much, roll home, watch movies and sleep early [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:40 PM Flag
»
Do u help out at in-laws or think of it more as going to a restaurant? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:42 PM Flag
»
MIL does not like anyone in her kitchen, so all I do is set the table and kids pass the appetizers around, my daughter is allowed in the kitchen to observe only - kinda funny but we are used to it after all these years [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:49 PM Flag
»
No family, hanging & cooking & eating & drinking with friends, :-) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:45 PM Flag
»
Turkey Trot, movies, dinner. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:45 PM Flag
»
Turkey trot! Go you! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:47 PM Flag
»
early spin class, shower, watch parade with kids, drive to relatives for early dinner and lazy afternoon, drive home, put kids to bed early, watch movie with DH [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:57 PM Flag
»
Head to my dad's house 1 hour away at about 10, to hang out/eat appetizers for a couple of hours. Whole family going out to restaurant at 2PM (long story, unusual for us). Heading back home with DCs after that to just chill. I have to work on Friday. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:57 PM Flag
»
Cooking for my parents and DCs. Enjoying that college aged DD is home visiting. Having a minute of sadness that I don’t have a partner to share this with and a big family. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 04:12 PM Flag
»
Cooking and eating -- seven of us. Trying to prevent the guests from arriving before the appointed hour. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 04:23 PM Flag
»
ha! good luck [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 05:46 PM Flag
[ - ] I defaulted on my student loans 20ish years ago. Attempted to pay them back, but payments were too high, and I couldn't keep up. Anyways, I really never hear from them! Maybe once every 3-4 years with a threatening letter, but that's it. I do want to pay them back, but wondering what the best thing to do is. I owe (now) about 60K. Do I wait for an inheritance and pay back full amount (sometime in the next 5ish years)? Can I negogiate then what I owe (knock down the amount)? Any advice? Anyone btdt? 17 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:29 PM Flag
»
Have you pulled your credit report? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:30 PM Flag
»
no, but i'm sure it is bad. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:41 PM Flag
»
You need to know what is on there. In certain cases it is better to leave things alone. Opening a 20 year old item may make your credit worse if not handled properly [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 04:08 PM Flag
»
this is my worry. not sure if it will ever just 'go away'! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 07:17 PM Flag
»
Do you work? Own a home? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:30 PM Flag
»
i work PT (have 3 kids). own a home (in hubby's name). [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:41 PM Flag
»
Get a line of credit and pay loans off [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:45 PM Flag
»
Terrible idea [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 04:26 PM Flag
»
i think if you're in default you can negotiate. what infested rate are you paying? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:37 PM Flag
»
not sure. i honestly hate even looking at the mail (when it comes). i'd like to negotiate a lump sum when/if we get an inheritance. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:42 PM Flag
»
You should try to renegotiate and pay back your loan in full. As a society, we should pay back our debts. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 04:07 PM Flag
»
i agree. and have tried several times. but the minimum payments were ridiculous. i fully intend to pay back -- just don't want to get completely screwed in the process. i totally regret getting these loans! and will advise my kids the same! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 07:19 PM Flag
»
No no no. You need to see who owns the loan now. If not the original provider (as is extremely likely), today's owner bought it for 5-10 cents on the dollar. If you pay them 15 cents with a release of all liabilities, they ought to be happy. The companies that do this with credit card debt are public and openly say in SEC filings they buy for 8 cents and try to collect 16. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 04:18 PM Flag
»
Agree. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 05:26 PM Flag
»
Go to daveramsey dot com. He'll walk you through how to negotiate a settlement and make sure it is legally binding on them. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 04:24 PM Flag
»
This! He really knows what he's talking about. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 05:27 PM Flag
»
Negotiate now while you're poor [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 05:46 PM Flag
[ - ] If you had a health issue that made you vomit in the shower between daily and weekly, depending on activity level, how concerned would you be? 24 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:26 PM Flag
»
Do you know the health issue? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:27 PM Flag
»
Concussion - from 10 years ago [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:30 PM Flag
»
This. If it was a side effect of a particular issue that's under control, fine. If I'm throwing up for no reason then I'd see a doc asap. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:30 PM Flag
»
Do you smoke weed [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:28 PM Flag
»
Yes - but I vomit more frequently without it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:30 PM Flag
»
You should stop. Weed can actually cause this. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:31 PM Flag
»
Huh. I’ll look into that. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:33 PM Flag
»
Cause vomiting? No, the contrary is true. Np [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:43 PM Flag
»
Agree. I think people are naive to think weed is OK. It messes up your brain, just like all other psychoactive drugs and I include alcohol in this. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 05:28 PM Flag
»
This [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:57 PM Flag
»
Not that concerned because I would know it’s a flare up and that I have to get back on medication... btdt unfortunately [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:28 PM Flag
»
What issue is this? MS? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:28 PM Flag
»
Good response, thanks. Sorry for your troubles. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:31 PM Flag
»
No it’s autoimmune, similar to crohns [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:32 PM Flag
»
This thread is very interesting; I had the exact same symptoms and dr said brain tumor, then MS, but couldn't find anything. Went on for almost a year, then just went away. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 05:47 PM Flag
»
sounds like it's something in your head [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:30 PM Flag
»
No - it’s an issue with my C1C2. Just trying to gauge reaction as mine is normally not normal. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:32 PM Flag
»
you have an issue with your c1c2 vertebral bodies that only makes you vomit in the shower? makes zero sense [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:38 PM Flag
»
Yeah, it’s not stable so something happens in the shower that makes me more prone to vomiting. I get sick other times of the day, too, but this is the most consistent. Better if I don’t wash my hair. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:46 PM Flag
»
real vomit or is it just acid build up? I go thru phases with phlegm and acid build up and just know I have to start eating properly again [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:31 PM Flag
»
Real vomit, or dry heaves. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:32 PM Flag
»
Very much so. I'd get that checked out with a CT scan or MRI. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 04:05 PM Flag
»
just in the shower? what triggers it? getting wet? water too hot/cold? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 04:38 PM Flag
»
Interesting. When I was pregnant brushing my teeth made me throw up. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 05:30 PM Flag
[ - ] We live downtown and fortunately are zoned for a great public school, but I just checked the class sizes and it seems that there are around 30 kids per class. That seems like a lot. Maybe I am just remembering my own experience in suburban public that had more like 20 per class. Is 30 kids per class no big deal? DB is only 3 so we have time to consider private. 31 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:25 PM Flag
»
Different gradea have different caps [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:27 PM Flag
»
OP - Looks like it was 25 for K and then shot up to 30 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:29 PM Flag
»
32 for NYC public after K [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:33 PM Flag
»
thats what it is at all the popular manhattan publics [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 04:08 PM Flag
»
I pulled out my elementary school photo in suburban America in the 70s and we had around 30. Class size isn't a problem and can sometimes be a blessing. It's also been proven that size doesn't matter - teacher matters. Unless you have a child with particular needs - then it might be a factor. But don't give it too much attention [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:31 PM Flag
»
"It's also been proven that size doesn't matter"... that's what HE says [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:33 PM Flag
»
Hi, my kid has 33. DH went to NYC public like this, He skipped 7th grade and got into a great college. He says NBD. DC is doing great. I think its bad if your in a failing school, etc. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:42 PM Flag
»
Goggle you will find the study [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 04:03 PM Flag
»
This is a major reason why we spring for private school even though we're zoned for a top public. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:38 PM Flag
»
I decided against private based largely on class size and grade size being too small! Different strokes [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 04:04 PM Flag
»
I think it is a lot but my yds is in a class of 29 right now and it is fine. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:38 PM Flag
»
I'm pretty sure it was around 25-30 when I was a kid except for k which was half day and had more like 40. My kids had 26 kids in k and then about 30 after that and it was fine expect for one kid for one year where the teacher couldn't control the class. I think most teachers can handle this just fine. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:51 PM Flag
»
DS is in 5th and this is the first year we've had the max of 32. It's been fine. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:54 PM Flag
»
is it 234 or 89 ? there are tours coming up [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:57 PM Flag
»
OP - Thanks - Actually we are zoned for Spruce St., but in any event, they are not going to tell me if the size of their classes are a problem... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 04:18 PM Flag
»
heard great things about Spruce. More about UPK, but school is new. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 04:19 PM Flag
»
OP - This isn't rocket science. You have one teacher that must divide her time among students. If a class has 1/3 less students, obviously the teacher has more time to focus on your child. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 05:17 PM Flag
»
OP - Sorry - that was meant for the comments below yours. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 05:17 PM Flag
»
OP - Sorry - that was meant for the comments below yours. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 05:17 PM Flag
»
Why do you think there's a problem? What indicates that? Or, are you just a negative person who doesn't have enough real things to worry about? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 04:24 PM Flag
»
np. +1. My thoughts exactly when she mentioned Spruce. Maybe she's just neurotic. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 04:25 PM Flag
»
I'm a teacher and it matters. However, if your kid is from a middle class or upper income home and doesn't need a lot of individual attention or have any special needs at all, he will be fine. But for example, I have taught in rooms with 18 kids and rooms with 30. (kindergarten) I typically have 2-4 kids in each reading group. Right now, with 18 kids, I have 6 reading groups total and I see 4 reading groups per day. I see my lowest students in a reading group daily, my high kids 2x per week. But when I had 30, I had 8-9 reading groups and this meant my high kids didn't get seen more than 1-2x per month, and my on level kids didn't get seen more than 2x a week. All the time was taken by my students who were below level. It matters in Prek-3rd. A lot. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:57 PM Flag
»
You didn't have push in reading or SETTS support? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 04:01 PM Flag
»
Hahahaha. No. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 09:43 PM Flag
»
This, it pretty much sums it up. the more kids the teacher has the less attention for the kids performing above avg. Since time is limited it's usually mostly allocated to students who need help not on kids doing at level and especially not on kids doing above level work. This usually means the kids above grade level get very little attention and are not challenged and can get bored. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 04:35 PM Flag
»
Where did you go to school that you had 20 kids per class in a suburban public school? Mine were always 30 per class. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 04:04 PM Flag
»
THIS. I never had a public school class with fewer than 30 children. Didn't matter. I went to Stanford and Cambridge University, so I did OK. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 05:20 PM Flag
»
Evidence is clear cut that class size has no measurable effect on academic performance. If you think your child will need lots of hand holding, or you as the mother do, and the expense is no big deal then go ahead with private. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 04:18 PM Flag
»
That is intuitively illogical. What study(s) are you citing? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 04:47 PM Flag
»
Didn't Malcolm Gladwell do a report on this? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 05:45 PM Flag
»
It has an effect of SEL for sure. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 09:44 PM Flag
[ - ] How often do you vacuum? 8 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:23 PM Flag
»
I'm not a micro-manager! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:23 PM Flag
»
upstairs maybe once every 10 days (ideally once a week). Downstairs 2-3 times a week. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:25 PM Flag
»
at least once a week, sometimes more if it needs it [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:26 PM Flag
»
Once a week [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:27 PM Flag
»
Never but cleaner does it once a week [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:36 PM Flag
»
never, unless we're having friends for dinner. but my cleaning woman does it weekly. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:38 PM Flag
»
2-3 times per week in LR, Kitchen, DR, bathroom. bedrooms maybe once a week [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 04:09 PM Flag
»
Cleaning lady vacuums whole house and mops once a week. I use a cordless vacuum in the living room and kitchen 3-4 times a week. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 05:27 PM Flag
[ - ] I feel like this board skews older than it used to. How old are you? 33 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:18 PM Flag
»
It does. I'm 48. When I was on here a lot 10 yrs ago it seemed everyone was 30. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:19 PM Flag
»
+1 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:24 PM Flag
»
Np: so were you... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 06:18 PM Flag
»
38 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:20 PM Flag
»
I'm 33, but yes, I feel like most people are older. Though there are the random unmarried 20-somethings that seem to come around, for some odd reason. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:21 PM Flag
»
You sound old. I'm 28 and have a kid. I am unmarried. Am I allowed here? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:26 PM Flag
»
Calm down, (not-so-) young'un. I'm talking about the people who don't have kids but regular 20-sometihng drama. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:29 PM Flag
»
ew [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:30 PM Flag
»
wtf is your problem. Don't be bitter because you're in your 20s with a kid. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 04:12 PM Flag
»
Lol I've come since I was in college because an older sibling told me it was entertaining. Now I'm finally married and TTC and no one is talking about babies anymore! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:30 PM Flag
»
33yo OR above: haha I stumbled across this site when I wasn't married because of some article linking to the HHI thread of yore. But then didn't bother coming until TTC. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 04:14 PM Flag
»
there used to be SO much TTC stuff on here [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 05:59 PM Flag
»
44 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:21 PM Flag
»
31 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:21 PM Flag
»
People age. Funny that. Maybe the solution is to kick posters off when they reach a certain age..? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:24 PM Flag
»
41 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:26 PM Flag
»
+1 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:34 PM Flag
»
30 -Seems younger than YBM demographic ( and nicer and more helpful) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:28 PM Flag
»
34 - everyone seems a few years younger [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:30 PM Flag
»
How can you miss all the posts from moms with kids applying to college? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:33 PM Flag
»
32 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:31 PM Flag
»
54 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:32 PM Flag
»
41 ... maybe more older moms w/young kids. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:34 PM Flag
»
46 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:34 PM Flag
»
45. on since 2004. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:37 PM Flag
»
43 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:38 PM Flag
»
33 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:39 PM Flag
»
39 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 04:01 PM Flag
»
51 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 04:24 PM Flag
»
almost 60!!! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 04:40 PM Flag
»
I'm getting close to it myself. Been here waaaaaay too long. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 06:03 PM Flag
»
52 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 05:58 PM Flag
»
tommy lee mom? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 06:20 PM Flag
[ - ] I am at my in laws. Sil Ds (19 months) keeps hitting and biting my 2 yo. They ignore it so I obv stepped in. Mil flipped out and told me he doesn't know what he is doing bla bla. I replied well maybe you should tell him it's wrong so he learns. Wtfo they expect my dad be his chew toy? 42 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:15 PM Flag
»
^ds [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:16 PM Flag
»
You're doing the right thing. Don't expect or need them to support you. Your ds needs you to establish the boundary if no one else will. Good job! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:17 PM Flag
»
Your brother’s kid or your DH’s brother? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:17 PM Flag
»
Dhs sisters kid. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:18 PM Flag
»
Have DH deal [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:19 PM Flag
»
Where are all the men? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:17 PM Flag
»
Op: outside or watching stupid YouTube videos. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:19 PM Flag
»
Send DS outside with DH [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:19 PM Flag
»
How should I handle this until Monday? Sil and kids father are trainwrecks so can't go to them. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:17 PM Flag
»
Take your kid outside to play [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:18 PM Flag
»
No one is going to die. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:33 PM Flag
»
Take your kid in another room [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:18 PM Flag
»
Op: I think I'm going to be his bodyguard. Kid left bite marks. I told her human bites are bad and she just said he is just a baby. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:20 PM Flag
»
He is just a baby but you also do need to protect your kid. But, since you are at DH’s relatives...he should be watching his kid. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:21 PM Flag
»
Don't overplay your concern. Kids bite [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:34 PM Flag
»
Can you teach DD to shout "no biting!" how can they object to that. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:21 PM Flag
»
I told him to yell and if he doesn't stop push him off. I told DH and he said he will police. I'm mad because my son is only a months older. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:24 PM Flag
»
Get over it [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:28 PM Flag
»
This. Put mama bear back in the cage. This situation is a 2. Don't give it a 7 response [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:35 PM Flag
»
She said police as in watch them. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:45 PM Flag
»
I understand the use of the word. My response stands. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 04:06 PM Flag
»
If you can’t deal with this you better not have another child. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:22 PM Flag
»
I disagree, what kind of parent doesn't intervene when their kid bites someone? No matter what the age?? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:30 PM Flag
»
The biting is normal, but not doing anyting about it is not. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:31 PM Flag
»
After the 10th shove, bite, hair pull of the day...I start tuning out my DCs fighting. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:33 PM Flag
»
if the kids are in the same room, you or your dh need to be on the floor protecting your kid. otherwise keep the kids separated. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:23 PM Flag
»
Normal kid stuff. My 19mo is doing the same to the whole family right now. My sil brought her crying 8yo to me saying dd pulled her hair... I said something like- well I’m glad she didn’t maim your face like you did to other dd when you were that age! Let them lord of the flies it... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:25 PM Flag
»
It's the way you dealt with it. Think about what you can do differently next time. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:26 PM Flag
»
a 2 year old can start learning, but it's better to just distract [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:26 PM Flag
»
I think distraction is the worst technique [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:28 PM Flag
»
why? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:33 PM Flag
»
Get the biter a baby Hannibal Lechter mask [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:29 PM Flag
»
You have to watch the biter and see what their trigger is, and get your kid out of the way. How did you step in? The phase is developmental and there isn't much than can be done about it. Just FYI since this is clearly your first kid, it is a million times worse to be the mom of the biter than the bitee when it comes to nursery school or childcare. BTDT [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:30 PM Flag
»
I agree. If OP’s DS was crowding the kid it took something from him...triggers a bite. This is not one sided [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:35 PM Flag
»
Op: biters mom doesn't say anything. My kids ( I have 2) don't bite. Problem is the biters mom is a drug addicted loser who dumps her kid on anyone with a pulse. Also human bites are dangerous. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:43 PM Flag
»
Where is the Father? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:47 PM Flag
»
Stop with the "human bites are dangerous" mantra. You lose credibility [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 04:18 PM Flag
»
who is watching the kids? you cant just expect a 19 month old and 2 year old to play nicely [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:32 PM Flag
»
Tell your kid to bite him back :) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:33 PM Flag
»
When you ( you meaning anyone on this board) tell these stories are you ever worried that "SIL" or whoever it is your specific story is on this Board, too? Lol [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:34 PM Flag
»
Op: I wish. I have written about my sil before. Dui with kid in the car. Adopted so she thinks she gets a free pass for everything. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:44 PM Flag
»
You are correct. It's called parenting. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:36 PM Flag
[ - ] Should pumpkin pie be refrigerated before eating tomorrow? 3 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:13 PM Flag
»
Yes [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:19 PM Flag
»
yes! i have one in the oven now. recipe says let cool on wire rack for 2 hours then serve immediately or refrigerate. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:39 PM Flag
»
I prefer my pie cold. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 04:06 PM Flag
[ - ] NYC Public - please explain ICT to me. DC is in 6th grade and having a hard time. He cruised through elementary, never doing too well but always at grade level (which means nothing, my older dc was always grade level but much more advanced). DC mostly had difficulties with ELA, but also struggles to get work done in other classes. How does one get ICT? what does it mean in a practical sense? 5 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
New York City 11.22.17, 03:05 PM Flag
»
Do you mean an IEP? ICT is a type of mixed class with two teachers [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:25 PM Flag
»
Why do you want your child labeled deficient based on a little struggle in one subject? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:36 PM Flag
»
Why do you want your kid to struggle & possibly fail? Get your ego out of the way & do what's best for your kid. Idiot. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 04:39 PM Flag
»
Do you mean a spec ed seat in an ICT class? He won't get it just because he's struggling, he has to have an IEP that mandates it. On the flip side, they prefer to place well behaved kids with good grades on the gen ed side. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:55 PM Flag
»
OP: thanks. What would warrant an IEP? to be clear, not looking "to make things up", just trying to figure out how to help him. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 05:03 PM Flag
[ - ] I am ruminating over something I said and need help to stop. I was sitting next to a mom at a sporting event and she said "is my daughter the worst on the team?" I said "No, she is so great when she's paying attention." Why did I say that??? I always say the wrong thing. Then I tried to make it better by saying a few more comments about how great she is and I could tell the mom was tuning me out - in a nice way - that she didn't want to get into a conversation. I keep replaying the conversation and feel so stupid. 10 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:03 PM Flag
»
You sound like a good person, which is why this is bothering you. Try to let it go. If she was insecure enough about her daughter to ask that question, she's probably heard or thought worse. In time you'll just cringe a little when you think about it but you'll stop obsessing eventually. Try distraction. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:05 PM Flag
»
I think she was fishing for a different kind of compliment and you told the truth. She was also probably not tuning you out, more likely she heard what you said and immediately refocused on her own daughter to see if what you were saying was accurate. You didn't say anything terrible at all. You just gave constructive criticism when she wasn't expecting it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:06 PM Flag
»
I don't see anything wrong with what you said. It was honestly weird for the mom to ask you that and put you on the spot. Nothing you would have said would have changed her mind. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:07 PM Flag
»
I agree [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:08 PM Flag
»
+2 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:33 PM Flag
»
It sounds like you are beating yourself up unnecessarily. But what matters is how this exchange left you feeling and how it will make you feel going into the next one. Anxiety can make us feel like we are socially awkward. Maybe keep a few stock comments in your backpocket that you can pull out in situations like these. For some people, it helps to have scripts. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:08 PM Flag
»
Don’t worry about it! She put you in a very awkward position with that question. I always say too much too and need to work on it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:08 PM Flag
»
Me too! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:40 PM Flag
»
I am you, in that I obsess over every thing I say that could be perceived as the tiniest bit awkward. And as someone who obsesses I can assure you this is nothing to even think about. I don't think what you said is bad at all. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:16 PM Flag
»
What you said was fine! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 07:00 PM Flag
[ - ] If you were to make a big life change, leave NY and take less stressful, lower paying jobs where would You go? We are both from NYC but families have retired to FL, the one place we don’t really want to go (Naples and Boca). We would ideally like to be able to buy a house for cash which would mean 800k or under but aren’t looking for anything huge, would like a walkable neighborhood with cute restaurants. Don’t care too much about weather although I like seasons. Does this unicorn exist? 27 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:01 PM Flag
»
Milton MA [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:04 PM Flag
»
Are public schools important? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:04 PM Flag
»
yes, forgot to add that [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:05 PM Flag
»
DH and I are in the same boat, we're moving to Philadelphia [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:07 PM Flag
»
The city or the burbs [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:08 PM Flag
»
Plenty of places. Check out Burlington VT. Good public schools and houses within ez walk of the downtown are 700 k [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:08 PM Flag
»
So you want to move to a place you have zero ties to? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:08 PM Flag
»
We did this (to Boise Idaho). with DC in schools, We immediately met a lot of great people. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:09 PM Flag
»
NP Love love love Boise. My SIL & BIL live there. Great place to raise kids. Not realistic for dh's career though. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:17 PM Flag
»
Fascinating. Are people there relatively liberal minded, etc.? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:34 PM Flag
»
In Boise they are. Outside of Boise, definitely not. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 07:24 PM Flag
»
OP is thinking of a fresh start. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:09 PM Flag
»
We have zero ties here anymore. Even friends keep leaving. Having family visit is difficult, especially as get get older [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:11 PM Flag
»
Where do your siblings live? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:13 PM Flag
»
We each have one, one in CA and one in Europe. Both $$ so not ideal for us [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:16 PM Flag
»
weston ct [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:12 PM Flag
»
No way. CT is fucked and getting worse. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:31 PM Flag
»
can't be worse than NJ [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 05:48 PM Flag
»
charlotte nc and charlotte latin school [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:13 PM Flag
»
CHeck out Frederick, MD. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:17 PM Flag
»
the problem with outside NYC is the people. I think about this same question, but I am Asian and I don't want to feel like everyone's wondering what my Chinese restaurant's name is. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:24 PM Flag
»
This is a very good point. There is a cultural difference in different areas of the country. Are you very adaptable? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:26 PM Flag
»
I am adaptable, but sacrifices like being the representative of my race and not having any options outside of middle American cuisine/attitudes/etc is something I don't know I can make. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:33 PM Flag
»
Are you OP or PP? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 04:10 PM Flag
»
PP [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 04:15 PM Flag
»
Charleston, SC [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 04:18 PM Flag
»
Very hard to break into the social scene. I don't mean the "scene", just to make friends. Very insular. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 06:38 PM Flag
[ - ] jake tapper verbally bitch slapped a tweeter who accused him of not defending women - he was like 'yo I dated monica lewinsky, byotch!' You can only read about this stuff on the_Donald. 7 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 02:59 PM Flag
»
good guy. shitty reporter, but good guy. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 02:59 PM Flag
»
You know the Donald is watched by the Feds, right? They've doxxed all of those users. They know your IP address and everything. And Russia picked up all your details when you clicked on the DNC emails in Wikileaks last year. You are all suckers. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:04 PM Flag
»
yeah, that sounds really credible. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:05 PM Flag
»
It is frightening to think about the shit you must be involved with if you are frightened enough by a bunch of corn fed hicks talking about the president that you make up lies about this kind of shit. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:06 PM Flag
»
High five! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:10 PM Flag
»
That sort of confirms why the 'drain the swamp'/deep state stuff is credible, then. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:07 PM Flag
»
Sounds like an urban legend to keep people off Wikileaks... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 09:44 PM Flag
[ - ] DD 12yo has gone insane. Tantrums, crying her eyes out that she does not feel loved or like she "belongs." Screaming and crying that we do not make her feel special and that she gets less attention than her 2 siblings. When I asked for concrete examples, she was not able to give any. DH's initial reaction is to shower her with gifts and attention to make her feel loved. I am worried that we'll be encouraging more of the same behavior. How would you handle? I suggested a therapist, but DH does not think it is a good idea. 43 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 02:58 PM Flag
»
Is she the bigger sister to younger siblings? Or the younger sister two boys who are very involved in a lot of sports and she has nothing special of her own? Try doing things one on one with her, even if it's just quick errands or taking her to a movie or out to lunch by herself. Hormones are horrible at her age, she's probably just about to get her period, doesn't feel like anything in her life is going right. Be patient with her. Put yourself back in a 12 year old tradition it's not easy. Of course there could be something bad going on at school? Something with her peers, a teacher going hard on her for something that's difficult? Spending time alone with her is the only way to figure it out she's not going to talk to you when she's upset. Signed mom of 15 and 16 year old girls [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:00 PM Flag
»
She is the oldest and has 2 younger sisters, but they are all 2 years apart, so no babies. I try to talk to her, but she manages to turn every conversation into an argument or an accusation. She makes is so damn hard. Perhaps I'd be more excited and willing to do things with her if she did not make it so painful every single time. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:08 PM Flag
»
This has nothing to do with you being excited about it. This is about her needing some one-on-one time to feel comfortable about whatever she's going through. 12 can be ridiculously hard you're not a teenager but you're not a kid and of the oldest she probably feels a lot of pressure to be the best yet she isn't really treated that much differently than the others because she was not that much older. Seriously, be the mom, give her some time alone with you. Like I said it doesn't have to be anything big, and leave the other two home with Dad and take this one out to pick up the takeout food or whatever it is just try to be alone with her and listen more than you talk [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:17 PM Flag
»
showering with gifts is a band aid. You need long term discussions/plan of action. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:02 PM Flag
»
I recently watched The Edge of Seventeen with Hailey Steinfeld and was completely reminded of what a shit-show the teenage years are. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:03 PM Flag
»
family game night (everything night this week and then once a week regularly), family nature walks, and some alone special time -- with games or activities. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:05 PM Flag
»
^ if she is the oldest, she can run a turkey trot with either you or DH tomorrow. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:06 PM Flag
»
OMG. Yes! A turkey trot! This will help SO MUCH. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:10 PM Flag
»
you seem to think it was a bad suggestion. YMMV, but I think it would be a great activity for the 12 year to do alone with one of her parents -- gets to feel older than her siblings, gets one on one time with a parent and gets exercise, which helps with hormone swings. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:13 PM Flag
»
It's a great suggestion. One on one time, physical activity, fresh air. Works wonders [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:39 PM Flag
»
Unless 12yo is fit, this is kind of an insane suggestion. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 07:01 PM Flag
»
+1 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 07:25 PM Flag
»
lol [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:18 PM Flag
»
If the change was abrupt, I would wonder if something has happened to her, to be honest. Anything going on at school? Bullying? Isolation? A boy who might be trouble? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:06 PM Flag
»
Honestly I would spend time with her and try to connect and have a conversation about hormones and choices and changes like I wish someone had done for me. Would’ve been great to know that what we experience in largely due to hormones and that all these feelings pass, even the most intense ones. Self awareness and regulation of expression of emotion starts now! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:07 PM Flag
»
Very intelligent [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 09:45 PM Flag
»
Hormones. Normal. No gifts. Act normally. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:09 PM Flag
»
Sounds like her hormones are going crazy. I wouldn't do anything drastic one way or another. No extra gifts, no runs to the therapist but I would make an effort to make sure she gets one on one time with you and DH away from siblings [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:09 PM Flag
»
OP: Everyone is suggesting hormones. I was a very mellow teen. Can the hormones be responsible for this craziness? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:10 PM Flag
»
yes. I was a monster at that age. I was a nice kid and am a nice adult. But teens years were terrible. My family jokes about it now. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:19 PM Flag
»
YES!!! I would get her in to a therapist though, so she has a safe space to talk to someone because her drama is draining you and dh. She needs to talk but you don't have to the ones to listen, KWIM? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:20 PM Flag
»
Hormones, personify, and parenting style. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:41 PM Flag
»
Of course!! Just because it did not affect you that way doesn't mean that what dd is dealing with is unusual or that she is a bad kid -- she's struggling with hormonal changes and fluctuations, it is your job as her mom to ride this out with her. Stop measuring her behavior by yours and use some imagination, try to empathize and figures out what *she* needs now, not what you would have needed at that age. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 04:19 PM Flag
»
Yes. It was like a switch flipped in me when I was 13. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 05:30 PM Flag
»
She needs therapy. She will feel better, and your whole family will benefit. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:10 PM Flag
»
I'm going to weigh in that she doesn't NEED therapy. This is normal kid stuff that can be handled by parents. We over therapy kids today. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:42 PM Flag
»
you are being too much of a lawyer - consider what she is *trying* to say to you, rather than asking for "concrete examples" like you are cross-examining her, and don't fundamentally trust her. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:10 PM Flag
»
She is saying how she feels, but I guess I'd like to understand where these feelings come from. I treat everyone equally. If I buy a present, I buy one for everyone. If I take them out for lunch, I take out everyone. No special treatments. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:12 PM Flag
»
The feelings are probably irrational but nevertheless painful for her right now, probably hormonal [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:13 PM Flag
»
I get it that she is feeling it, but I am at a loss how to help her to rid of those feelings. I am a rational person and it is hard for me to deal with someone who is being so overly emotional and not rational AT ALL. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:16 PM Flag
»
Explain exactly that to her. When she’s calm and in a good, seemingly clear headed mood [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:26 PM Flag
»
You can't expect to "get rid of" feelings that are hormonally driven, you just need to ride this out with her. Don't try to change her while she is at the mercy of hormones, that's like trying to "change" someone with severe PMS. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 04:22 PM Flag
»
This! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 04:21 PM Flag
»
It's not good that you're being defensive IMO - it's not about you. Her complaints might as well be in Chinese - she is expressing an emotion - it isn't about the content of what she is saying, but that she feels whatever basic emotion (fear, anxiety, etc) she is feeling - don't minimize it or necessarily validate its rationale, just recognize it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:17 PM Flag
»
THIS [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:32 PM Flag
»
Quit doing that. Spend some time alone with her. They don't always have to be a sibling unit [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:29 PM Flag
»
This. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 04:21 PM Flag
»
There’s the probably! Give them all special individual treatment!!! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:33 PM Flag
»
If you are still here, my dad used to say if you treat all your children equally, you are by definition not treating them as you should. Each child is different and needs different things. Just good for thought. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:43 PM Flag
»
OP: yes, still here. I recognize their differences in terms of who needs what support with school work, who wants what activities, but when it comes to gifts, one-on-one time, I've always tried to be equal not to create jealousy. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 04:01 PM Flag
»
Read. Repeat. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 04:19 PM Flag
»
But she's not the same as the other kids, she is at a very different, very difficult developmental stage, and your effort to deal with it "rationally" and treat everyone the same clearly isn't working. As OR said, you are being too much of a lawyer. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 04:21 PM Flag
»
Does she get enough sleep? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 04:25 PM Flag
[ - ] Do you think sexual transgression that occured pre-death of Charlie Chaplin/fall of the Soviet Union should maybe be given a little less weight? 15 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 02:52 PM Flag
»
nope [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 02:54 PM Flag
»
I guess since I was born in the 80's it seems like a long time ago. But some of you are probably still using the same clock radio you used then. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 02:55 PM Flag
»
yes [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 02:56 PM Flag
»
I'm still using my iPods from like 10 years ago. They're thick as a deck of cards. My son's friends were looking at it like it was a museum piece. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:02 PM Flag
»
LOL [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:08 PM Flag
»
There actually is one in the MOMA. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:08 PM Flag
»
You can probably put mine there. At this point they still charge but don't show as charged (the battery icon looks empty). The one they were looking at probably does belong in a museum, it's like the biggest collection of mom music ever. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:14 PM Flag
»
you should look up how to replace the battery on youtube - sometimes these projects are not as hard as you think, and are kind of fun to do/cheap. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:15 PM Flag
»
Interesting! Thanks! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:34 PM Flag
»
We are looking at the end of sexual harassment. all women have iphones and can record it now [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 02:55 PM Flag
»
they will have to know how to edit out the part where they're like * I LOVEEEE JELL-O SHOTS BRODIE !! !! * [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 02:56 PM Flag
»
Nah. The iphone will separate out the real from the fake [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 02:57 PM Flag
»
Just let them poop in the sandbox. They're getting more random by the day. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 02:59 PM Flag
»
lol [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:09 PM Flag
»
As a matter of curiosity, why do you specifically bracket the death of Charlie Chaplin in 1977 and the fall of the USSR in 1990-1991? HM [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:39 PM Flag
[ - ] My sister has completely taken over my parents 50th wedding anniversary party which was supposed to be a joint effort (and was going to be our present to our parents...) I need to think of something else to give them - hoping for it to be special and thoughtful but cannot think of anything. Anyone have any good ideas? Budget is around $1000 15 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 02:52 PM Flag
»
a weekend trip somewhere. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 02:55 PM Flag
»
In addition to what you decide, a photo book made up with pictures from their lives or a video service that does this. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 02:57 PM Flag
»
All the albums are in Seattle, where they live (along with my sister) and she has informed me I can "send a few pictures" to add to it if I want. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 02:59 PM Flag
»
They aren't big travelers - they have a cat they don't like to leave. (I know, I know its just a cat....believe me I've tried...) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 02:58 PM Flag
»
Can you get top level lodgings for the cat? That might allow them to do it. Once of the fancy pet places. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:07 PM Flag
»
One of* [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:08 PM Flag
»
Make an album of photos/mementos [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:00 PM Flag
»
Its hard because they have spent a lifetime accumulating and probably don't need a thing. Are they into technology? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:08 PM Flag
»
Nope, technology confuses them. This is why I'm having such a hard time. (a) my sister has the photos/memento thing covered because I'm in NYC and don't have any access (b) they don't want to leave their cat (not even to come visit their grandchildren but I digress...) (c) they aren't into any tech (I bought them an iPad that still confuses them) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:19 PM Flag
»
so just put your name on the party and let your sister do it if she is the one that is in the same city, giver her a check and do what you can from afar and thank her profusely - done [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:24 PM Flag
»
THIS IS THE WINNING RESPONSE. OP, the party can be from both you. Makes sense for her to plan most of it since she is there and you aren't. Cut her a check and sign the card. DONE. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:33 PM Flag
»
Yes, this. And if you want to feel involved, ask if you can be in charge of the cake, and order a very fancy midi wedding cake. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 04:19 PM Flag
»
Make a photo book, like others have suggested, but make it 50 Reasons Why You're a Cute Couple (or however you'd describe them.) Then find pictures of them and caption them things like #27. You still make each other laugh. Or whatever. Even if you can't get your hands on a bunch of pictures, just use the ones you have and make it more text than photos. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:40 PM Flag
»
Theater or music subscription? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:41 PM Flag
»
I recommend a Disney cruise. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 04:26 PM Flag
[ - ] List of government officials or those elected office that are sexual harassers or pedophiles 15 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 02:50 PM Flag
»
Donald Trump - R [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 02:51 PM Flag
»
Roy Moore -R [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 02:51 PM Flag
»
Clarence Thomas - R [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 02:51 PM Flag
»
Al Franken - D [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 02:52 PM Flag
»
I don't believe the accusations against Al Franken, and fortunately, neither do most of his constituents. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 02:54 PM Flag
»
Because photos and corroborated reports mean nothing, of course. Brilliant! lol [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:21 PM Flag
»
Bill Clinton -D [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 02:52 PM Flag
»
Oh no let's not elect him [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 02:59 PM Flag
»
John Conyers - D [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 02:53 PM Flag
»
George Bush -R [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 02:53 PM Flag
»
An old old man grabbed a woman's butt. He's obviously not all there, anymore. No impulse control or filter. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:07 PM Flag
»
there is more to the bushes [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:20 PM Flag
»
Boy is this ever true [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 09:51 PM Flag
»
So..time to elect more women [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:16 PM Flag
»
meh [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 11.22.17, 03:23 PM Flag
Refresh » New Post »
close [X]

close [X]

Select a Category (only 1)

category
Stages
Regions