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[ - ] I have a little bird who keeps sttacking his reflection in the window. I hope he doesn't kill himself. I try to scare him off but he keeps returning. Sad :( 16 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:18 PM Flag
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Oh no! Poor little thing. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:19 PM Flag
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Put pictures of other birds in your window [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:22 PM Flag
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Or maybe cats are better [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:22 PM Flag
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Ok this is getting to be a Big Bang theory episode. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:28 PM Flag
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or a cat [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:23 PM Flag
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Or owl [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:25 PM Flag
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Stick a helium balloon out there [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:24 PM Flag
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I have a sun conure in my kitchen. A cardinal outside has apparently fallen in love with her. Every time I look I see him, so I finally lowered the storm window so he can roost there and they can stare at each other. Pretty funny. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:28 PM Flag
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Love blooms in unexpected places! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:33 PM Flag
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It's cute. I toss bird seed out for him, too, which is probably part of it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:42 PM Flag
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That's the way to a bird's heart, you know. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:51 PM Flag
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I won't tell my bird, I'll let her think it's because she's so awesome :) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:53 PM Flag
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I like you. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:59 PM Flag
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why I like you too! :) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 05:11 PM Flag
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Put decals on the windows. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:36 PM Flag
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Nokd [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 05:04 PM Flag
[ - ] Just got a jury duty notice. What are my chances of only missing one day of work? 8 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:18 PM Flag
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In Kings County you call in the night before. Sometimes you go, sometimes you don't. If you're actually in the pool, it might be two days if not selected. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:20 PM Flag
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Very high, they are much better now about trying to get people in and out. I served just one day, the judge thanked us for our time, that was it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:22 PM Flag
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good to know! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:22 PM Flag
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Just tell them you are racist or have been victim of crime. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:23 PM Flag
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Yup. Or don't believe in drug prosecutions no matter what. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:29 PM Flag
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Then you will sit in the jury pool room. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:31 PM Flag
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This won't work. I was put on a criminal case involving drugs. I told the judge my car was stolen by a drug dealer. He said "This is New York City. Everyone in this room has been the victim of a crime." [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:55 PM Flag
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BTDT, and the shortest time I was away from work was 2 days. What county? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 05:20 PM Flag
[ - ] Anyone have a rec for an attorney for a post-nup? This is not big money. Any experiences with post-nup? TIA. 4 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:15 PM Flag
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s/o going through a divorce. Thank goodness for the prenup. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:18 PM Flag
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op: Thanks. What happened? Dh wants another dc and I am on the fence due to finances. He has some separate premarital assets but his career tanked immediately after marriage. In the case of divorce he can walk out with his assets and potentially alimony/cs from me. I want his assets to be joint so I would not be left empty-handed. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:36 PM Flag
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You are smart. Has he agreed to sign one? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:49 PM Flag
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op: He agreed but then had a document drawn up where I am co-trustee on a joint trust but within that he has his own separate trust. Defeats the purpose. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 05:59 PM Flag
[ - ] Any btdt on who successfully survived parental abandonment? Once I served dh with papers he decided he will have nothing to do with our ds. Looking for some suggestions how to make it easier for ds who is 7. Thank you. 42 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:15 PM Flag
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What did the papers say? Does he pay cs? What is wrong with him? I am so so sorry. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:16 PM Flag
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I want sole custody due to dh's problems/issues. Visitation would be supervised. I didn't ask for cs. I just want us to be free to live a calm chaos-free life. Ds hasn't seen him since December despite my invitation for visits, including staying over at my house. DH just doesn't want anything to do with parenting. And yet he'll call me during the day to just chit-chat. It very confusing for me too. I don't understand how someone could cut off their child. I'm at a loss how to help ds other than lots of love, hugs, time together. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:24 PM Flag
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Quit chatting with him. Men do this often. Don't malign him but don't tell your DS what a great guy he is, b/c he is not. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:27 PM Flag
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I try to avoid contact with him, only when asking him to take a call from ds or to go to his sports event. Which he refuses. I don't bring up 'dad' to ds at all. When ds brings him up i'll listen, never say anything negative but don't gush about him either. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:34 PM Flag
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pp: Wth?? He wants to chat but doesn't want to see his kid? That is so horrible. Are you so loaded you can't use the cs? Put that in the 529 at least. So sorry. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:37 PM Flag
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^Did he have a relationship before? Is the ex on alcohol or drugs? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:38 PM Flag
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Yes, during our separation I would have him come to my house and spend the weekend. Yes to question #2. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:50 PM Flag
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pp: Aha. So alcohol or drugs. I suspected. That is a real shame. So sorry. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 06:01 PM Flag
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THIS. It isn't your money to refuse. It is your child's right. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:44 PM Flag
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relax she'll go for the money if it is there. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 05:13 PM Flag
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I'm so not loaded but getting by ok. It has been a complicated, chaotic, scary experience and I just need to make it easy and asking for cs would have been setting the stage for a drawn out experience with no real pay off in the end because I know he would simply refuse to pay. we've been separated for a couple of years and have had to beg for any $$. He has even referred to himself as a dead beat dad. He stole Christmas $$ from one of ds' cards. It makes me nauseous thinking about it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:49 PM Flag
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It's kind of rude for you to tell your husband you don't want him to see his kids and then complain that he doesn't want to see his kids, isnt it? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:59 PM Flag
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I think you missed something. He is not stable enough to trust with ds. He has poor judgment which has resulted in a lot of financial and judicial problems. I am happy to have him involved in ds life, and have a guest room for him to visit. this has worked well for the past couple of years but once I tried to finalize this, he decided to just check out. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 05:03 PM Flag
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YOU decided he isn't "stable" enough. Not a court. Don't you see the difference? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 05:08 PM Flag
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Did you see my sentence regarding judicial problems....that would be 'the court'. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 05:13 PM Flag
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YOU decided he isn't "stable" enough. Not a court. Don't you see the difference? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 05:08 PM Flag
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if he had his shit together he would fight her - i tried to push my ex out of the picture and ended up in court for 6 years. He would have none of it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 05:15 PM Flag
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Never knew my mom (or can't remember her). Lots of love from family helped me through. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:16 PM Flag
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Thank you, and I'm sorry. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:25 PM Flag
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Thank you, and I'm sorry. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:25 PM Flag
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Therapy. And, don't try to find another "father figure" by jumping back into dating and introducing your son to new men too quickly. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:20 PM Flag
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I'm so burnt out that no one would want me right now. Plus my only real interest is making sure ds is ok. And honestly he seems ok, he's doing well in school, has lots of friends, plays sports. It just at bed time occasionally he'll talk about missing his dad and being sad and not know what to do about the sadness. He doesn't bring it up a lot but a few times and I want to make sure he doesn't have life long issues from it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:30 PM Flag
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He is going to be sad. It is a sad thing. But don't let him see that his talking about it makes you sad, or he will stop bringing it up in order to protect your feelings. Acknowledge his feelings. You don't have to fix them. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:35 PM Flag
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I'm pretty stoic so I only let him see me sad when watching a tear jerker movie or something or when our dog got sick. I've mastered the engaged listening without showing my true emotions. I've told him it's totally normal to be sad. He talks, I listen...not sure what I can say to make it better which is something he has requested. In fact he told me maybe Grandma could help him since 'she's older and has more life experience' than me. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:41 PM Flag
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Ah. Got it. If he is asking for someone to help make him less sad, I'd consider a counselor at this point. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:45 PM Flag
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Ok, thanks. I collected a couple of names but have been putting it off hoping things would turn around - a phone call here, a visit there but I don't see it happening. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:54 PM Flag
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I'm pretty stoic so I only let him see me sad when watching a tear jerker movie or something or when our dog got sick. I've mastered the engaged listening without showing my true emotions. I've told him it's totally normal to be sad. He talks, I listen...not sure what I can say to make it better which is something he has requested. In fact he told me maybe Grandma could help him since 'she's older and has more life experience' than me. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:41 PM Flag
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++++ [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 07:14 PM Flag
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No, but do look for other family members and family friends who can spend time with him. And look into big brothers. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:30 PM Flag
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My brother who lives across the country started call ds every night, just for some guy talk. He did this without me asking which was really nice. DS looks forward to the 7:30 phone call. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:36 PM Flag
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Love this. What a great guy. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:38 PM Flag
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Yeah, I'm lucky. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:50 PM Flag
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That's great. I was going to suggest making sure you have a close male friend, brother, uncle, etc in his life. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:49 PM Flag
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Have them start doing Skype. And remember to tell your great brother how much it means to ds. So sorry both of you are going through this, but it's honestly better for some people to check out entirely vs trying with such limited capabilities. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:59 PM Flag
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Great idea. We have facetime, which I never think to use. I'll suggest it for tonight! Thank you. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 05:04 PM Flag
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We adopted our DS when he was 11 when he was essentially abandoned by his parents. Therapy and support helps. Also making sure he knows that you'll always be there for him. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 05:00 PM Flag
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Thanks. I'm going to call for an appointment. You sound like great parents to adopt an older child! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 05:06 PM Flag
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This is so sad. My father abandoned me before I was born, and DS's father did the same to him. It was perhaps easier on us because we didn't miss what we never had, but your DS has had 7 years with his father. Definitely get him into therapy and work on strengthening the relationships he has with his grandfather, uncle or other male figure. I'm sorry for your troubles. Your ex-DH sounds like a major dick. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 05:04 PM Flag
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Your last sentence made me laugh, so thank you! I'm pretty lucky because the men in my family are generally great guys, some are children of divorce themselves. I'm sorry for your situation, but it sounds like things have worked out well for you. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 05:12 PM Flag
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OP here. Thank you all for listening, support and the suggestions. I really appreciate it. It's difficult to talk about irl. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 05:21 PM Flag
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I am close friends with a man who's father committed suicide. Harvard grad, amazing father and very successful. He does have a really nice mom and he was part of the big brother's program in his town. GL, OP and sorry you're dealing with this. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 06:13 PM Flag
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This is good to hear. Thank you. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 06:24 PM Flag
[ - ] Planning a family trip to London and Paris (taking my mom and grandmother), and then DH and I will go one more location alone. Recommendations? Would probably have 4 nights. 9 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:06 PM Flag
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Also - will be using Marriott points, most likely, so any Marriott or SPG hotel recommendations would be appreciated. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:06 PM Flag
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We used points at the Marriott Champs-Elysées. Yes, it's like staying in Times Square but the hotel was nice, quiet and was an easy starting off point to other areas. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:26 PM Flag
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OP - I was looking at that one! I figure that'll be best to keep things easy for my mom + grandmom. Hoping to find something more off-the-beaten path for when DH and I go solo. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:33 PM Flag
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How much is it costing? lol. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:21 PM Flag
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OP: Mostly using points/miles [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:22 PM Flag
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Iceland as part of return home? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:53 PM Flag
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That's an idea, I've heard it's great [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 07:06 PM Flag
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Amsterdam is very romantic. You might also think of going to CInque Terre in Italy or Capri. If you are looking for a city- go to Barcelona. The beach is actually nice there too. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 05:51 PM Flag
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Do you think Cinque Terre or Capri would be warm in Oct? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 07:06 PM Flag
[ - ] Honest question here, I cannot ask friends IRL... I know many girls my age (28-30) who are dating MUCH older men. I'm talking 40- to 50-something guys with receding hairlines, teenage kids, and alimony payments. Why?!? Has it always been like this and I'm just now seeing it, or is this a new phenomenon? I could never do that, it would be like dating my father. Why choose to deal with ED and prostate problems in your 30s when there's a sea of hot young men out there? Is it money or what? 164 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:04 PM Flag
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Women, not girls. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:05 PM Flag
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OP - Okay fine. Please answer my question! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:06 PM Flag
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Daddy complex [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:06 PM Flag
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OP - So do American dads suck this bad that 3 out of every 10 girls want to date a middle-aged dude? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:07 PM Flag
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Yes. Haven't you kept up on all the posts where women complain about their DHs? Those men have daughters who grow up with daddy complexes. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.28.17, 12:50 AM Flag
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all about money [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:06 PM Flag
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OP - Not all are loaded though, but they ALL come with baggage [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:08 PM Flag
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Rich, established, daddy issues [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:06 PM Flag
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Would assume money. Roll the dice on a 28 yo guy who may or may not make it. Or take the retread with a known amount of $$$. Men father children into their 70s (and beyond) so no worries there. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:08 PM Flag
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OP - Old sperm have genetic issues [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:09 PM Flag
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link? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:12 PM Flag
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OP - You Google it, it's basic scientific fact now [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:31 PM Flag
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you made the original (incorrect) assertion [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:35 PM Flag
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OP - What I said is correct [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:37 PM Flag
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But you won't back it up. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:53 PM Flag
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OP - Google "old sperm genetic problems" and this is literally the first link that comes up http://genetics.thetech.org/older-dads%E2%80%99-kids-higher-risk-genetic-disease [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:56 PM Flag
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Yep. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 11:42 PM Flag
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40 - 50 is not "old" sperm sweetie. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:21 PM Flag
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OP - I meant mid 40s to mid 50s. 50+ is absolutely old sperm. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:22 PM Flag
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No. To high schoolers, yes. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 06:18 PM Flag
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Yep [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 11:04 PM Flag
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Yes it is. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 11:04 PM Flag
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You should ask them directly. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:08 PM Flag
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OP - I said I can't. Don't want to offend them, just been wondering [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:09 PM Flag
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Spend more time on self-improvement. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:09 PM Flag
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OP - I'm good, thanks [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:22 PM Flag
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"Hey, girlfriend... I've never dated a guy more than 5 years older than me. What's it like to date someone with that much of an age difference? Should I try it?" Will that offend them? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:22 PM Flag
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OP - To start, I'm married so they'd probably find it weird that I was looking for an old sugar daddy [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:27 PM Flag
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OMG, you can't find a way to ask this without offending your friends? It's not that big a deal. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:31 PM Flag
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OP - What's a nice way to say, why are you dating/engaged to someone so old? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:34 PM Flag
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"Hey, girlfriend, I'm so curious to know what it's like to date someone with more than a 5 year age difference. I never got the chance to try before I got married." Seriously, it's not that hard. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:43 PM Flag
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OP - Sounds like I'm asking about a type of food hah! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:47 PM Flag
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OP - "I never got to try filet before I became vegetarian, what's it taste like?" [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:48 PM Flag
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I give up. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:50 PM Flag
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This has to be the dumbest thread ever. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:31 PM Flag
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OP - I've seen dumber ones honestly [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:36 PM Flag
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Yeah, from the teen trolls. How does that feel? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 06:19 PM Flag
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And it just made MP. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:46 PM Flag
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What an accomplishment [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:54 PM Flag
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So glad dh is my age. Women I know Who married old farts ended up not getting much money and widowed ". Ick: [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 11:05 PM Flag
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I have friends that are married to guys 11+ years older than them. Neither are wealthy so it's not about the money. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:08 PM Flag
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This. DH is 14 years older. Been married 28 years and definitely not rich. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:08 PM Flag
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Married 15yrs. DH 19 yrs older. Not rich. No sex problems. DCs intelligent, healthy and no issues. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 06:02 PM Flag
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Married for...drumroll....love. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 06:02 PM Flag
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Same. OP is an immature dweeb who never advanced out of fifth grade. My kid is more worldly than her. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 06:18 PM Flag
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Not yet. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 11:07 PM Flag
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But you will be a widow forever. Don't come back with the anyone can die, anyone can get hit by a truck bullshit. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 11:07 PM Flag
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They were insecure. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 11:06 PM Flag
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Money and power. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:09 PM Flag
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I said this before kinky sex [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:09 PM Flag
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^knowing you're wanted badly, etc., power, money, etc. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:10 PM Flag
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^trophy gf [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:11 PM Flag
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huh? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:12 PM Flag
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yes, written by a guy troll [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:13 PM Flag
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OP - Nothing would dry me up faster at this point in my life than 50+ [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:30 PM Flag
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This. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 11:42 PM Flag
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I suspect this is fake. Probably written by a guy. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:11 PM Flag
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Yep. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:12 PM Flag
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OP - No, I'm a woman who's married to a man about my age. I just don't understand. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:23 PM Flag
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Lying. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 11:43 PM Flag
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ITA [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 07:44 PM Flag
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MRA troll. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 11:42 PM Flag
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I am older and I have seen this among younger women as well. I dont understand it at all. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:15 PM Flag
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OP - Okay, glad I'm not the only one. Have you noticed this trend for quite awhile, or only recently? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:24 PM Flag
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Being that you're only in your 20s, how can you talk about "a while?" [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:26 PM Flag
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OP - What? I asked this question to the OR who said that she is "older"? Please work on your reading comprehension. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:28 PM Flag
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No, you seem to have no grasp of anything outside of physical attraction. A simple mind, for sure. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:29 PM Flag
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OP - Which is the basis of romantic relationships. Absolutely other things are important, but why deprive youself when you're young?! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:32 PM Flag
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Eyeroll. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:33 PM Flag
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OP, you sound very young. Not age wise, I mean in terms of maturity. And I don't mean that as a criticism, just an observation. I hope you know this about yourself, self awareness is very important. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:48 PM Flag
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OP - How is what I'm saying immature? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:53 PM Flag
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The idea that physical attraction is the basis of romantic relationships is an immature approach. Relationships are complex, there are a myriad of factors that influence attraction. It's fine that you think that, but I suspect with age and experience you'll change your tune. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:57 PM Flag
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OP - Of romantic sexual relationships, yes it is. But there are other types of love, like companionate. Sex isn't what makes a married but it has an important role as the glue, so to speak. I don't understand how acknowleding that physical attraction is important makes me immature. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 05:01 PM Flag
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* makes a marriage [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 05:01 PM Flag
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Healthy children are a result of healthy parents. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 11:08 PM Flag
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Actually I am more fascinated by men who marry older women. I am only saying this here. I have 2 GF's who married younger (5-7 years) men and now the women are in their 59's and decidedly less attractive while the men still look good, even if they are less attractive than when they met. I would be a mess wondering when he would leave me for someone younger. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.28.17, 12:07 AM Flag
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In their 50's (mid) not 59's! DH's are mid- 40's and early 50's [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.28.17, 12:08 AM Flag
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Me too! Could not deal with that. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.28.17, 02:33 AM Flag
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I'm 29 and if something happened with DH, I'd look for an older, established man. Marrying for love is nice and all, but paying the bills is nicer. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:21 PM Flag
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OP - I get that perspective, but you can find both youth + success in a partner.. And what about the sexual attraction? I will be attracted to my DH when we're in our 50s, but I cannot imagine as a 25-30 yo women getting hot from a guy in his 50s. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:26 PM Flag
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Plenty of women do though. Look at Clooney and Amal. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:27 PM Flag
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He is a famous movie star and rich. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 11:30 PM Flag
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You sound pretty confident about being attracted to your DH when you're in your 50s. You sound young, that's all. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:28 PM Flag
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OP - He keeps himself fit and attactive is why. IF he let himself go, I would expect no so much [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:29 PM Flag
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*not so much [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:29 PM Flag
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There you go again with the physical attraction. You know nothing about love. Nothing. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:30 PM Flag
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OP - Because it's important in a relationship! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:33 PM Flag
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Collapsing this extremely idiotic post. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:34 PM Flag
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OP - If you think this is extremely idiotic you haven't been here long [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:51 PM Flag
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Just curious, OP... how long have you been coming here? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:58 PM Flag
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If she's 28 to 30, she's been here how many years? Since a teen? Since 25? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:59 PM Flag
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OP - Lord, too long [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 05:02 PM Flag
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Ugh. That's because we live in a patriarchy. Men run the world. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 11:08 PM Flag
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lilly [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:37 PM Flag
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This. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:37 PM Flag
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OP - Not Lilly. Our writing is very different. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:38 PM Flag
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lol [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:41 PM Flag
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But the inability to see outside your life is the same. Twinsies! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:41 PM Flag
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OP - Which is why I'm asking a question here... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:43 PM Flag
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go away lil [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:44 PM Flag
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OP - If I were Lilly I would have called people "low IQ" or "poor" about 10 times already, and would write "lolz" at the end of every sentence. Not Lilly. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:46 PM Flag
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You guys should definitely get together. Same mind, same immaturity. Twinsies! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:47 PM Flag
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OP - If Lilly is the girl y'all outed, at least her DH isn't 50+ She's got that in her favor. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:49 PM Flag
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Sounds like something a school kid would say on the playground. Listen to yourself. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:50 PM Flag
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OP - Kids insult each other for having old dads? Weird.. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:57 PM Flag
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You started this. You are responsible for your posts. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:59 PM Flag
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OP - You think people are "responsible" for anonymous posts on an anonymous internet forum. Hah, okay. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 05:03 PM Flag
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Yup. Lilly. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 05:07 PM Flag
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Yes. Again, a sign of your immaturity. Give it up. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 05:08 PM Flag
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annnnd the nonsensical insults begin... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:53 PM Flag
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She outed herself! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 11:44 PM Flag
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go away lil [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:47 PM Flag
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Lilly is such an asshole. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 11:30 PM Flag
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yup [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:42 PM Flag
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ITA [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 05:54 PM Flag
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OP, do you have kids? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 05:10 PM Flag
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I dated older guys and honestly I felt so desired and they are much more confident and relaxed. It was a turn on. So I get it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 05:28 PM Flag
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Hey, OP... This is how it works. In the case of this responder the confidence and relaxed nature of these men is more important than physical appearance. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 05:31 PM Flag
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OP - No I get that, I never said other attributes weren't important. What I am saying is that physical and sexual attraction is also important. And you can find all of that, minus the middle-aged American male physical problems, in younger men. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 06:55 PM Flag
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In my experience, the older the guy is the more easily he can express his desire for you (emotionally and physically) without feeling too vulnerable. This is often a problem for younger guys. -np [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 07:00 PM Flag
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Yes dear. No thanks. If my dh were 20 years older? He would be 75 right now!!!! Fuck that! My 55 year old dh is making dinner right now. Look ahead ladies! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 11:34 PM Flag
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So this! There are no younger men who would stay with a cougar for life. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 11:32 PM Flag
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OP - Okay fair point. I understand that. But can't you be just as desired by confident men who aren't 20+ years older than you? For myself, if personality and manner were held equal, I would much prefer the man in 20s & 30s. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 06:50 PM Flag
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A 45 year old man can achieve a completely different kind of confidence than a 25 or 30 year old man can achieve. It's just time and experience. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 06:55 PM Flag
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And he will he old. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 11:34 PM Flag
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Of course you were "desired". These guys were on their last legs. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 11:31 PM Flag
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Eh dating is different than sleeping with or marrying. My guess is that younger guys are more into hook-up culture while they establish their careers and older men are more likely to court the younger women (pay for things, take her to nice meals, live in a nice place) since he knows he has to do that to compete. 9/10 she's still seeing guys her age and usually the older men aren't looking for commitment since they already raised their kids and don't want more unlike the 35/45 yo. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 05:49 PM Flag
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Also in the NYC market late 20s guys finally start getting attention (unless they were really good looking) so it makes them less relationship oriented just when the girls their age are ready to settle down. Girls start freaking out drop their standards and start considering older men. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 06:02 PM Flag
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OP - Okay makes sense [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 06:51 PM Flag
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PP: I've heard from male friends that it's almost unnerving how much easier/more interest they got once they were in their 30s and had hit certain career milestones. No chance in psysical appearance (if anything less hair and a few more pounds). [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 07:44 PM Flag
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That's because some women are into money! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 11:35 PM Flag
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Doesn't mean they should date old farts. There is a middle ground people!! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 11:35 PM Flag
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Doesn't mean they should date old farts. There is a middle ground people!! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 11:35 PM Flag
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OP - Yes, something I wonder is if many still see hot younger guys on the side. But the women dating the middle-aged men seem to be very committed, almost marriage-lite, so IDK [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 06:53 PM Flag
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PP: Exactly! Do they live together? Is she pushing marriage/kids? Otherwise let them be. It will run its course. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 07:41 PM Flag
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i think that some of them are easily impressed with the perceived maturity of men in their 40s+ versus guys their own age. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 06:01 PM Flag
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Gold diggers. Plain and simple. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 07:44 PM Flag
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No, grandma. Most people see no issue with age differences or gay marriage because we aren't clinging to tradition over rationality. if your love is based on physical attraction above all else and that would disappear with an age difference then I feel sorry for you [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 08:09 PM Flag
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Wanting a DH without 6 figure debt is hardly gold digging. It's practical thinking. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 08:27 PM Flag
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I'm 28 and married to a DH my age but MANY of my friends and peers are dating older guys in their 40s and 50s. I think the answer is two pronged. 1) Student loans. Many educated guys in their 20s have hundreds of thousands in college and grad school debt. Not exactly marriage material. My DH got a full scholarship to undergrad and grad school, but most men in their 20s are not in that circumstance. Student loans are a turn off for many women. 2) Millennials don't see a stigma to age differences in a relationship. Love is love, and we accept gay marriage, polyamory, and age differences without having problems with it. They aren't hurting anyone so why it it anyone else's business? They should do what makes them happy. Dealing with a 45 year old DH who needs prostate exams is probably preferable to these young women as opposed to dealing with a DH their own age who has 350k in student loans on top of their own student loans as a young woman. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 08:03 PM Flag
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This, it's because of student loans. Men in their 20s just aren't marriable for the most part. This will have generational shifts in impact. These men who are past over in their 20s will marry at 40 once their loans are paid off and will mate with women who are 25. Every generation going forward will see more and more of the trend of older men marrying younger women. The stigma is already disappearing and will disappear even more in the next 20 years. Hold onto your DH's ladies. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 08:16 PM Flag
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So you are OK with your daughter being a widow for 20 or 30 years?! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 11:37 PM Flag
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Because on your planet there is no such thing as getting remarried after your spouse dies? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.28.17, 02:03 AM Flag
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They can only "mate" with 25 year olds if they have money. Don't be an idiot. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 11:39 PM Flag
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Don't be an idiot yourself. A middle age 40 year old making 70k with no debt is preferable to many millennial women than a 27 year old guy making 70k with 400k in student loans from college plus grad school. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.28.17, 02:05 AM Flag
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It's not Bout stigma. It's about whether a poor 40 year old can attraf a younger woman. There are only so many to go around. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 11:40 PM Flag
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Stop with this Millennial shit! Think long term. You will be 50 with a 70 Year old. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 11:36 PM Flag
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younger men are now used to free (literally free like they don't even have to take you to dinner) sex with multiple women. thank god for sex positive feminism. so now, younger men have no interest in settling down. i feel sorry for you younger women. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 08:52 PM Flag
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This is true in Manhattan. Yes. Not so true in flyover [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 09:01 PM Flag
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np - in flyover, the choices are not so great. and by 30, many are already married w kids and divorcing. bt dt. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 09:18 PM Flag
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You sound happy about that. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 11:40 PM Flag
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UB is always about making women feel shitty. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 11:41 PM Flag
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UB is always about making women feel shitty. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 11:41 PM Flag
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Student loans plus poor economy for young people [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 09:11 PM Flag
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Age is just a number [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 09:11 PM Flag
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No it isn't. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 11:38 PM Flag
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Who cares? Let them marry old dudes. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 09:12 PM Flag
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Fuck no. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 11:38 PM Flag
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At 30, I wouldn't call 40 "much older". [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 09:36 PM Flag
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I would. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.28.17, 12:10 AM Flag
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Different priorities I guess, want to be taken care of, provided for and perhaps the cache of being the youngest in the room- old person feels lick and somewhat indebted to her.. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 10:25 PM Flag
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I was with someone 15 years older for a few years in my 20's. I wasn't into binge drinking or clubbing and had finished college by 19 years old so I felt like I didn't quite fit in with my generation. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 10:55 PM Flag
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I'm 29, and I dated a guy in his forties when I was in my early twenties. I've always been mature for my age and felt that guy was a better match for me at the time than guys my age. We parted ways for reasons unrelated to his age, but I don't see the big deal wth dating older guys. Most important is finding someone who understands you and has shared interests. I don't know very many people who have hobbies specific to their age. Seems like a limited way to live life [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 11:14 PM Flag
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It could be because younger men treat women of their own age badly. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 11:32 PM Flag
[ - ] Devin Nunes. Did you know he is an agricultural major? He has no background to be suitable for being head of the Intelligence Committee except being a favorite of the Koch Bros. He ran opposed in 2016 yet received 1.6 million dollars in campaign contributions! Say what? No wonder his job seems to be to work hard to cover up for Trump instead of investigate. Pure corruption - those Republicans lack any sense of morality. 3 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:03 PM Flag
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Why would he have any qualifications. None of the rest of the GOP does. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:05 PM Flag
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...and the breaking news is? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:05 PM Flag
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Check the qualification of the guy in charge of developing the next generation of nuclear weapons. Under Obama it was a Nobel prize winner. Now... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:06 PM Flag
[ - ] Has Anderson school made decisions on 6th grade admission? If so, about what time did it make the decision? Just want to mark in my calendar for next year. Thanks! 8 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:00 PM Flag
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you know there are 7 seats correct? and they were only reading 25 or so essays? plus, few of the seats are for IEP kids [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:02 PM Flag
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I know it is hard but 7! Thanks! Guess the chance of those 7*2 parents on this board and reading this post is slim...... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:03 PM Flag
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and Anderson is still part of DOE. Would guess ALL public middle school info released same day. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:07 PM Flag
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Watching this for next year as well . Is preference given to D 3 ? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:26 PM Flag
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no, its a citywide school - any borough can apply [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:33 PM Flag
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i think you also needed to be invited to take test - from talking to friends sounds like you needed about 4.3 on ELA and slightly higher on math. we had 4.2 ela and did not qualify [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:36 PM Flag
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My DD is close but we'll see for next year . I thought that was the cut off for NEST. I know sounds impossible but one kid from our school got in recently . [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 06:02 PM Flag
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It's separate from the middle school admission process. I got an email in mid-May about the decision. My DD's year, you needed to score high enough on the onsite math test to get your essay read. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:49 PM Flag
[ - ] Does anyone know whether NEST+M has made the 6th grade admission decisions? According to this post, it seems that is the case. Does anyone know how it works? So NEST admission is separate from all other schools? http://www.urbanbaby.com/topics/55691436 4 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 03:59 PM Flag
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No that post is talking about opting out of state tests and Hunter admissions. NEST decisions at least until last year would come out around the time DOE decisions came out - sometime in mid - end April. I would not expect it to be different this year. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:08 PM Flag
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Middle school offers come from DOE. all schools notified same day. Nest is included in DOE general middle school app [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:12 PM Flag
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as of this year, it is not separate from the other middle schools. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:21 PM Flag
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What grades/state scores do you need for NEST? Have a third grader who's strong in math/science but don't know how realistic it is as an option. Thanks. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 08:05 PM Flag
[ - ] Have been reading "bolt hole" much more frequently lately. How long has this been a thing? 13 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 03:57 PM Flag
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I'd have to google that. Don't know what it is. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 03:59 PM Flag
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Used to describe an escape place or retreat [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:00 PM Flag
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^ possibly British? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:00 PM Flag
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Very British. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 07:16 PM Flag
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Thanks! I didn't know what it was but was afraid to google in case it was some disturbing sex thing. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:02 PM Flag
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That's what I thought. Then saw Maureen Dowd use the term. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:03 PM Flag
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It has become the go-to phrase since Trump was elected to characterize your escape locale when the apocalypse hits. The uber wealthy are buying bolt holds in NZ. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:09 PM Flag
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Not sure how I've missed it (I even read the Dowd piece.) Guess I had my head up my bolt hole. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:26 PM Flag
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Vanity Fair, not NYC [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:36 PM Flag
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*NYT [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:37 PM Flag
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Oh, haven't read the VF yet. I have 3 months just sitting on my coffee table unread. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:46 PM Flag
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I think I read the expression in English spy novels: the bolt hole was where the spy could run and hide if the enemy was about to grab him. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:12 PM Flag
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This is depressing. I refuse even to think about that [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 05:37 PM Flag
[ - ] Paypal refunded my money today. How many days will it take to show that refund to my credit card? 8 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 03:48 PM Flag
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Whatever you do, don't ask Paypal. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 03:54 PM Flag
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LOL [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:36 PM Flag
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32 days [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 03:55 PM Flag
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what? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 03:56 PM Flag
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32 days between processing the refund and the refund appearing on your credit card. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 03:59 PM Flag
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that long? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:02 PM Flag
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Ask PayPal [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:03 PM Flag
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You have to actually request the transfer to your linked account -- otherwise it will just sit in your PayPal account. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 10:07 PM Flag
[ - ] Need to buy outdoor furniture for a beach house. Furniture I don't need to pull in and out of rain/winter/inclement weather. TIA! 7 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 03:47 PM Flag
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costco seems to have ton on line [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 03:49 PM Flag
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this [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 03:54 PM Flag
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Front Gate [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 03:53 PM Flag
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+1 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:04 PM Flag
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if in ny/nj area - fortunoff has a backyard store with big selection [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:03 PM Flag
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what place has good, simple adirondak furniture? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:08 PM Flag
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If you're on the ocean, nothing lasts very long. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:26 PM Flag
[ - ] Working from home today, and just made myself an early lunch of a English muffin pizza. It was really good. This is why I can't work at home - I can't stop eating. 2 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 03:46 PM Flag
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CSB [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:06 PM Flag
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If it's all you're having until dinner, I wouldn't worry. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:14 PM Flag
[ - ] Thoughts on US Naval Academy? Do you know any grads/what was their experience? 94 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 03:45 PM Flag
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Thomas Magnum. He turned out alright, a nice oceanfront estate in Hawaii and Ferrari. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 03:47 PM Flag
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:) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 03:57 PM Flag
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love! But Robin owns the estate and Ferrari. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 03:59 PM Flag
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Higgins IS Robin! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:02 PM Flag
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Was that revealed at the end? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:06 PM Flag
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I'm re-watching the whole series. In the first season they actually show Robin and it isn't Higgins. In season 5 or 6 Higgy Baby and Thomas travel to London for some Robin Masters event at another one of his estates. The estate manager is a mess and Higgy Baby takes over. The British estate manager doesn't recognize Higgins as Robin. I haven't gotten to season 8, the final season yet. Obviously I have way too much time on my hands. But I find this show to be timely now, concerns over Russia and spies, veterans struggling, mental health, extreme wealth inequality. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:09 PM Flag
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Ok, UB is officially the most random, though sometimes thoughtful and witty, place in the Internet. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:15 PM Flag
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^ No, they (orchestrated by the mastermind Higgins) use Orson Welles for the voice, but do not show Robin on camera. Who is to say the British estate manager has ever seen Robin in the flesh? It WAS Higgins all along. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:17 PM Flag
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But I thought higgins said he wasn't! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:27 PM Flag
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occam's razor [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:45 PM Flag
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This [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:09 PM Flag
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better than the Air force academy [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 03:50 PM Flag
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Tailgate? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 03:55 PM Flag
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You're thinking of "Tailhook". [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 03:56 PM Flag
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Oops [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:37 PM Flag
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Which was Navy pilots; hello? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 10:13 PM Flag
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Yeah but not "tailgate". Hello. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 10:30 PM Flag
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I love tailgating! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:08 PM Flag
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Air Force Academy is a country club. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 10:10 PM Flag
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Yup. As is the Air Force. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 10:30 PM Flag
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Is this a serious question. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 03:54 PM Flag
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it is [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:01 PM Flag
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Why wouldn't it be? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:05 PM Flag
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Not a military person myself, but would be proud of a DC who graduated [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 03:55 PM Flag
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Probably the best all around, though more West Point guys seem to go to HBS [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 03:56 PM Flag
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HBS grad here. Plenty of grads from all all three service academies in my class. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 03:57 PM Flag
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What year? My year was mostly USMA [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 03:59 PM Flag
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I'm old! mid-90s [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:33 PM Flag
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Aren't there five? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:12 PM Flag
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Actually, four. Kings Point is similar but different - chartered differently and has a different obligation post-graduation. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:35 PM Flag
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Yes 5, also Coast Guard and Kings Point (Merchant Marines) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:13 PM Flag
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So West Point is worse [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:10 PM Flag
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Cousin went for a year. It was more something my aunt and uncle wanted than he wanted. Hated being out at sea. Went on to have a good career in IT. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 03:56 PM Flag
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Yeah...he wasn't underway much in the first year. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 03:58 PM Flag
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This was back in the early 70s. Were you there? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 03:59 PM Flag
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No but I have family who went and the program doesn't change. And they are not underway the first year, period. It's hard tho. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:02 PM Flag
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Your cousin likely flunked out. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:02 PM Flag
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+1 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:08 PM Flag
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No, but you can dream. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:10 PM Flag
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You don't go out to sea at all the first year. The second sophomore, as a rising sophomore, you'll probably do some kind of cruise where you're sort of like an intern. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:06 PM Flag
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This [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:07 PM Flag
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^^sorry, second *summer* [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:08 PM Flag
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Is there an out-to-sea reuirement during undergrad? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:53 PM Flag
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I'll call my cousin and have him give you the specs circa 1970. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 05:01 PM Flag
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The way it worked during my time there was the summer was divided into four blocks, about three weeks each. One block would be some sort of time in what I previously called an internship where you join an actual Navy ship, or aviation squadron, or Marine Corps unit, or submarine. Another block would typically be doing something with the Academy, either in Annapolis like helping to run the indoctrination for the new class, or one of the summer programs that someone linked to below, or maybe a sailing cruise. And then sometimes you got two blocks to go home on break, or maybe you got one block and wanted to take a summer school course during the other block. But that's how you fit in the "underway time." [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 05:18 PM Flag
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My BIL. Super successful, made tons of contacts, now retired and makes $$$$ working for a contractor. He's super smart and personable tho...other people's MMV [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 03:57 PM Flag
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Academically rigorous and physically demanding. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 03:59 PM Flag
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grads go in navy for five years/tuition is free otherwise correct? go they draw salary when in the navy? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:02 PM Flag
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yes [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:04 PM Flag
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about $3K/mo to start [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:05 PM Flag
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grad. that's what I made over a decade ago. It's got to be higher now. don't forget to include BAH/BAS [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:12 PM Flag
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They start drawing salary as soon as they go to school. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:05 PM Flag
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It is not much and a lot of it has to go to expenses. In the end there is nothing really left over. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 10:31 PM Flag
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It's more by senior year. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 10:33 PM Flag
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yes, you're paid. reasonably well, too. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:07 PM Flag
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5 years if you do anything except flying or medical school. Then it's 7+ years depending on which route you go. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:09 PM Flag
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what if you want to go on to grad/law school? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:13 PM Flag
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They will pay for it, you just owe more time, a couple more years typically. The military has their own programs for grad school (leadership, etc.), but I believe you have to go out of the Navy for law school. You do your time and then come back to finish your commitment. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:14 PM Flag
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They also receive a housing allowance, works out pretty well for young officers, especially in places like Hawaii where 4-5 of them can rent a mansion together. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:12 PM Flag
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You also receive an interest-free loan after you finish your junior year - many mids will buy a car, but the smart ones invest/save it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:16 PM Flag
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I'm a grad. Great experience that I wouldn't trade for anything. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:05 PM Flag
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OP: thank you - ds is only in 8th but we are interested in info now. Seems like an amazing opportunity and incredible education. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:06 PM Flag
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I think it was. It's certainly unique. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:07 PM Flag
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Posted below - check out Summer Seminar in a couple of years to get a taste of the experience - https://www.usna.edu/Admissions/Programs/NASS/ [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:10 PM Flag
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Another option for younger kids - https://www.usna.edu/Admissions/Programs/STEM/index.php [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:11 PM Flag
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You should visit one spring weekend! Annapolis is a great city, so much fun for families to see. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.28.17, 01:23 AM Flag
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Wow I just checked out the daily schedule - it's grueling. Congratulations on making it through that! You must be tough. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:53 PM Flag
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the first summer, and the first year, were tough. after that it was fun. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 05:19 PM Flag
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Very familiar with it, grew up in Annapolis and sponsored over 20 grads. I would says 90% absolutely love it. You usually know right away if it's right for you or not. I actually almost went, but decided last minute it would be a good fit. The grads I know have all gone on to be very successful, whether they stayed in the Navy or went to the private sector after their commitment. Companies loves USNA grads. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:08 PM Flag
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Love Annapolis [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.28.17, 01:18 AM Flag
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My daughter was interested in applying then ended up going elsewhere. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:09 PM Flag
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It's hard to get into [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 10:18 PM Flag
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You will receive an excellent academic education, excellent physical skills (i.e. sailing, sports, general fitness) and solid values for future leaders. But you have a serve after the degree. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:13 PM Flag
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But in the long run 5 years or so is nothing. And after that your options are almost endless with the degree and leadership experience you gain. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:15 PM Flag
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They're nothing unless you die at war. And I'm not kidding around with that! I had 3 friends from high school attend the USNA and 2 out of the 3 went on to become marines. One of those 2 died in Iraq, and another one has a few close friends that died in Iraq because they post touching memories of them every Memorial Day. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 06:47 PM Flag
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OP: I'd be scared for him to go into the Marines, but oddly not so if the Navy [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 06:51 PM Flag
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pp- I could see that. Even as I typed it, I was thinking that staying strictly in the Navy is surely a safer option, and definitely an option for a USNA grad (obviously) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.28.17, 01:12 AM Flag
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very sorry to hear this. so sad. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 06:52 PM Flag
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Grad. It is tragic, but extremely rare, statistically. I can think of only one classmate of mine, out of about 1,000, who has been killed in the "War on Terror" (a Marine, not surprisingly). [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 06:54 PM Flag
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OR - 1 of the mids we sponsored, who was a Marine pilot, died in Iraq. Everyone else has been on a ship or sub or specialty (like Dr.) and in the scheme of things very safe. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 07:20 PM Flag
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I think it is 6 years now. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 10:21 PM Flag
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my brother went. He was a pilot in the navy for years and is now an airline pilot. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 07:53 PM Flag
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if they survive [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 08:19 PM Flag
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My dad and brother. In watching my brother go through it (late 90s) I felt like it was a lot of Mickey Mouse BS (hazing, etc.). If you have options (which most people do, given financial aid, state schools, etc. - these are smart individuals), I don't know why anyone would choose that rather than a regular school where you have more freedom. My brother regretted his choice very much. I would NEVER want that for my children - I have all girls, so even moreso, but even for boys, I would not. I felt my brother was honestly better than that and a lot of it seemed like a huge waste of time. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 10:19 PM Flag
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Did he graduate? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 10:31 PM Flag
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Yes. He asked to be allowed to transfer, my parents said he had to first improve his grades so he could transfer to somewhere decent, and in the end he just stayed. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 10:32 PM Flag
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^ to me, for him to want to leave and humble himself to ask my parents, it had to be really bad. I should have said, they tried to talk him out of going there when he wanted to, because my dad pretty much hated it too. But my brother wanted to prove something. So to ask to leave was very significant. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 10:34 PM Flag
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Went to high school with a guy who was dead set on going to the naval academy. Worked for years to get in. Had a twin brother who went on to an ivy. Parents didn't plan on paying two tuitions so put all their money into the brothers ivy bill. Well he ended up not being able to handle it and dropped out his first semester. Ended up at he shitty state school down the road because there was no money for anything else and it was too late to get a scholarship anywhere competitive [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 11:59 PM Flag
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MY DH graduated about 20 years ago. He's still in the Navy. We live near Annapolis. We love it. The Navy has paid for his bachelor's, master's, we have the GI Bill transferred to our kids which will cover their tuition. Its been an awesome ride. He'll retire next year at 50% salary and health benefits for life. His USNA friends are his closest friends, 20+ years later. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.28.17, 01:15 AM Flag
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The only naval academy grads I know were officers in another country and are now arms dealers. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.28.17, 01:21 AM Flag
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Wtf does "officers in another country" mean. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.28.17, 01:24 AM Flag
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Free. It's free. No one mentions this, but it is the #1 consideration for almost everyone who considers it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.28.17, 01:32 AM Flag
[ - ] What do I get my sister who has it all. I dont want to break the bank so about 100 tops plus she can buy anything for herself as she is very wealthy. Thanks for your help! 24 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 03:44 PM Flag
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Peole like that, you treat them to dinner and make them a cake. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 03:47 PM Flag
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we dont live in the same city... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 03:49 PM Flag
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Go visit her for the weekend if you can. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 03:50 PM Flag
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doing that in a few months [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 03:56 PM Flag
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Why ask if you don't want suggestions? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:05 PM Flag
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Who said she doesn't want suggestions. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:12 PM Flag
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She just doesn't want your suggestions. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:22 PM Flag
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Is there something your city is known for? Preferably something consumable--a local food that can ship? a spice mix unique to your region? even artisan soaps or candles by a local artist? Anything like that? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:24 PM Flag
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maybe take her to a show? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 03:50 PM Flag
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Yuck [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:13 PM Flag
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maybe take her to a show? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 03:50 PM Flag
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she does not like shows [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 03:55 PM Flag
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A framed photo of the 2 of you as kids? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 03:51 PM Flag
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Oh I like this idea. Anything that is nostalgic is a good choice OP. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 03:54 PM Flag
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ive done this. take the time to scan it and print it a little larger. Then buy a nice silver frame. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:01 PM Flag
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Treat her to lunch or a fun night out. Doesn't have to be upscale or fancy, just something fun you both enjoy. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 03:52 PM Flag
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Bottle of champs [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 03:59 PM Flag
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Ewwww [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:13 PM Flag
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make it personal, not expensive. something you both liked as kids, A framed photo, book about something you've talked about. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:00 PM Flag
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This [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:13 PM Flag
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Totally this. Or even a Carvel ice cream cake or Mrs. Fields cookie cake if she'll appreciate that (or if her DCs will). [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:19 PM Flag
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Gift certificate to spa near her [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:08 PM Flag
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How about sending some nice flowers and calling her? I think everyone loves flowers [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:22 PM Flag
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birthday has passed - she was traveling. i called her. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:27 PM Flag
[ - ] Need opinion: will you ever pay for subscription service like how NetFlix work but for book exchange for kids similar to program out there for toy borrowing. Would you pay like $20 for 5 books you want and have it ship it to you monthly and you return it back. 6 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 03:44 PM Flag
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Um no. I have this thing called a library. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 03:48 PM Flag
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THIS! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:08 PM Flag
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This [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:13 PM Flag
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Uh...did you know that the library is free? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 03:49 PM Flag
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No. A library outing is entertainment. New books can be purchased through Scholastic for that price point. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 03:50 PM Flag
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Massive retard [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:14 PM Flag
[ - ] MY dd's friend, graduated in December 2015 and finally got a FT job. Is it that tough out there? 3 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 03:41 PM Flag
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What field? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 03:47 PM Flag
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I am assuming some sort of PR. She got a job downtown for a finance company as a media asst [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 03:49 PM Flag
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For some [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 04:14 PM Flag
[ - ] I'm assuming it was discussed at length but I wasn't around last week. Did we discuss the Trump supporter whose husband was deported? 5 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 03:41 PM Flag
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We must have, but I missed it. The entitled, but I didn't think it would happen to us, attitude was so telling. Everyone wants these sweeping policies but then they think their issues should be exceptions. Healthcare reforms, but not on the issues that are important to me. Cut government spending, but still fund the programs I like. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 03:44 PM Flag
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+1. So stupid to think he was only going after the "bad" ones. Guess what, they're ALL "bad." [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 03:53 PM Flag
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Nope. I don't feel bad for her either. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 03:44 PM Flag
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+1, but I do feel bad for her children [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 03:54 PM Flag
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I laughed. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.27.17, 03:55 PM Flag
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