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[ - ] What's your favorite guilty pleasure tv show to watch? 4 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:52 PM Flag
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basketball wives....embarrassing!! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:42 PM Flag
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anything real housewives. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:42 PM Flag
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NP which is your fave? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:43 PM Flag
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Extreme Couponing on TLC [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:42 PM Flag
[ - ] That Kansas City poster is ridiculous. I bet the likelihood of having a fatal car accident on the drive is higher than contracting Ebola. I wish I could crunch the numbers and prove it. Statistics mom? 1 Reply [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:47 PM Flag
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I think that poster was messing around. They threw in a few details to make it sound more real but it's too fake to have an answer for absolutely every comment. Remember when everyone and their brother had an emergency escape plan in place to get out of the city after 9/11? Those sounded more reasonable than Kansas mom. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:53 PM Flag
[ - ] Can someone compare Miele and Gaggenau cooktops, oven, dishwasher, and fridge for me? Consider both brands for our new renov. 3 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:40 PM Flag
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Not what you asked but we have a Miele dishwasher and love it. But why would you do all of one brand? I think it's better to get the range you want, the fridge you want, etc. Mix and match - no one will know. If you go top of the line sub-zero is great for refrigerator. Wolf and other specialty brands for range, etc, etc [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:33 PM Flag
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I have Gaggenau and if I had to do over I would go with Miele. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:45 PM Flag
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Yale appliances has a good blog [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:45 PM Flag
[ - ] Please suggest a less expensive Carribean destination for a family of 4 during Presidents week. 3 and 5 year old children 2 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:38 PM Flag
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Not sure about hte price but we have gone to silver sands in jamaica before and loved it. you get a house with staff. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:49 PM Flag
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go to jetsetter.com and look at stuff. or tripadvisor [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:50 PM Flag
[ - ] I'm over NYC but I am coming to the realization that it may be the best fit for me. Where else could I live? I want intellectual stimulation, some refinement and culture, but mellow. I can't do northern or southern California b/c it's so not me. I don't want the South. Chicago isn't my favorite either. 33 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:30 PM Flag
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Boston [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:31 PM Flag
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Maybe. Good idea. Any particular area? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:32 PM Flag
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South End [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:24 PM Flag
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+1 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:47 PM Flag
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Newburyport [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:24 PM Flag
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I wouldnt live anywhere but Back Bay or maybe South End. I lived in Back Bay 10 yrs and loved it- clean, cultural, enough nightlife to suit me. On Boston overall, just ignore the townie/provincial element elsewhere in the city and minimize the sports noise if it doesn't suit you. But the intelligence and reasonableness of the educated crowd is a big plus. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:35 PM Flag
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TY! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:36 PM Flag
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I posted Newburyport above. there's actually a resurgent singles scene that's been there for several years. Seems to be the place on the North Shore to move after the divorce. Nice seaport town and some really good shopping and restaurants; charming architecture. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:31 PM Flag
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We have good friends who live near Rowes Wharf. They seem to really like it there. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:50 PM Flag
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Ugh. I really did not like Boston. It's one thing if you grew up there or went to school there and quite another if you move there as a working adult. Very, very difficult to meet people. Plus, it's expensive! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:26 PM Flag
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I am the above Back Bay poster- I had the exact opposite experience. Boston is quite cheap compared to NYC- what is expensive is the suburban housing. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:30 PM Flag
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What is rent in Back Bay these days? Just curious [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:33 PM Flag
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3500 for a 2BR in a brownstone, around 4000 for a newer building [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:49 PM Flag
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I agree with you. Either you buy into Boston or you hate it. It's not for everyone for sure. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:32 PM Flag
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I agree with you too. I lived in boston for 8 years after college. I wouldn't move back. Not intellectually stimulating enough. Urban area is small so you end up spending a lot of time in the car and the suburbs. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:36 PM Flag
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Maybe it's you? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:21 PM Flag
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Op - yes I think it is me! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:32 PM Flag
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what is so "not you" about San Francisco? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:32 PM Flag
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I like SF alot. But it's actually too intense in a granola-y way. Everyone i know there would never let their kid eat something non-organic. I just find it over the top. Much more than NYC. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:34 PM Flag
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and probably more expensive [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:35 PM Flag
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np. dh and i felt this way about sf. it is kind of too chill for us. we fit in in nyc better. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:51 PM Flag
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I know this will shock you, but there are smart culturally refined people in every city in the United States. Go visit a few places where you think you would like the climate and explore with an open mind. You will be very surprised what you find. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:38 PM Flag
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The climate things is a good idea, thanks. I agree there are great people everywhere. It's just finding a fit with a whole city can be more challenging than that. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:41 PM Flag
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How is your fit with wolf whistling construction workers, or gangbangers, or religious zealots, or homeless people, or smug hipsters in any city including NYC. People have a tendency to compare the best of one city with the worst of another. Compare the worst of NYC, the aspect of the city that is driving you away, with the worst of any other US city and other cities start to look much better. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:49 PM Flag
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Very good point. I've never thought about it that way. Thanks. The noise and homeless and crowded streets are really getting to me, I need to remember that. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:51 PM Flag
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This [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:31 PM Flag
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D.C. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:42 PM Flag
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this [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:51 PM Flag
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college towns, but it can be hard to find jobs. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:43 PM Flag
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OP - This might be the best idea. I work remotely so I can live anywhere. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:34 PM Flag
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so, ann arbor, athens, austin, ithaca, chapel hill, etc., etc. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:49 PM Flag
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charlottesville, durham [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:51 PM Flag
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Chapel Hill is the most overrated college town in the United States. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:41 PM Flag
[ - ] I am waiting for results of MaterniT21 (from last Monday) and blood test from first trimester screening (this Monday, nuchal measurements were normal). Not sure whether to call the doctor or assume no news is good news, until they call me. I am somewhat afraid to call and have the receptionist respond that the doctor will call me, which I'll probably interpret to mean there is a problem. Any advice? 4 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
Expecting 08.01.14, 03:27 PM Flag
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the receptionist is not permitted to give results so saying the doctor will call you is not indicative of anything being bad [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:18 PM Flag
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That's very helpful. Thanks. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:31 PM Flag
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Agree, it never hurts to call. Since it's a Friday in the summer call now vs. waiting later in the day when the doctor may have taken off. FWIW, I remember when DD was younger and we had to do a test for DD--didn't' hear when I was supposed to. Called the office and it turned out that they didn't get around to calling (had the results many hours before) as all was fine. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:24 PM Flag
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Did they say they would call you either way? My OB is no news is good news. If there is an issue, they call right away. I can also view all my results on their online portal (which I didn't realize they had until a few months in, ask if they have one). [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:33 PM Flag
[ - ] Looking for one syllable girl names. Feminine but not frilly. suggestions? 45 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:23 PM Flag
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Clare or Claire [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:14 PM Flag
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Any particular letters? What does last name start with? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:24 PM Flag
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Last name starts with a K. Son's name starts with a C so no C's, unfortunately [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:26 PM Flag
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Gotcha. Like the Jane suggestion. Rose, Skye, Sloane, Blake (don't love this but it's one syllable), Pearl, Blair, Joy, Tess [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:17 PM Flag
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Jane. I love this name. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:25 PM Flag
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I like Jane but i worry about 'plain jane' and 'jane doe' associations. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:15 PM Flag
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Oh please. Any name can be ridiculed. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:17 PM Flag
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+1 this is my DD :) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:17 PM Flag
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Too simple [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:26 PM Flag
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OK Hayden's mom! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:47 PM Flag
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Last name starts with a K. Son's name starts with a C so no C's, unfortunately. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:25 PM Flag
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Grace [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:16 PM Flag
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This is nice. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:16 PM Flag
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Eve? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:28 PM Flag
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op- love this one. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:18 PM Flag
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Chone [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:28 PM Flag
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clone? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:27 PM Flag
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nevermind, it's a joke for posters that are also on youbemom [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:41 PM Flag
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Jane, Leigh [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:18 PM Flag
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OP - what is this? lee? lay? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:36 PM Flag
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Lee [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:29 PM Flag
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Maude [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:28 PM Flag
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yuck [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:27 PM Flag
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Jill [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:20 PM Flag
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May [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:31 PM Flag
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like mae better [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:36 PM Flag
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or maeve [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:36 PM Flag
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Rose [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:31 PM Flag
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Dawn, Jill. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:33 PM Flag
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Anne [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:34 PM Flag
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Lee [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:24 PM Flag
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Bree [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:35 PM Flag
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whaaat? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:27 PM Flag
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Van de Kamp [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:46 PM Flag
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lol [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:38 PM Flag
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Chay [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:35 PM Flag
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Dale [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:27 PM Flag
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Fleur [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:28 PM Flag
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really? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:42 PM Flag
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elle [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:39 PM Flag
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Joy [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:28 PM Flag
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Reed [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:29 PM Flag
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Kate [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:41 PM Flag
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OP - Love Kate. would have to do Katherine nn Kate. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:43 PM Flag
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Brynn [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:41 PM Flag
[ - ] Awkward Hollywood couples. 8 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:20 PM Flag
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Op: Chad Kroeger and Avril Lavigne [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:32 PM Flag
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Courtney Stodden and the old guy from Lost [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:26 PM Flag
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Heidi and Spencer [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:26 PM Flag
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cameron diaz and that madden guy [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:39 PM Flag
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Bradley Cooper and Suki Waterhouse [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:29 PM Flag
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Jenny McCarthy and Donnie Wahlberg [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:44 PM Flag
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I never totally got Sarah Michelle Gellar and Freddie Prinze Jr. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:45 PM Flag
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Meg Ryan and John Mellencamp [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:48 PM Flag
[ - ] I'm a regular lady with a little knowledge in all areas. Ask me anything! 5 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:19 PM Flag
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Best tent to camp? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:32 PM Flag
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how many people? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:47 PM Flag
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IS it normal after having a DB to pee your pants a little when you cough? I'm 2 months PP and I have bronchitis. I'm peeing myself! Will this go away or permanent change? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:47 PM Flag
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np - totally normal. it often goes away on its own. if not, go to your doctor. there are various specialists who can help. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:39 PM Flag
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My 3 year old is so, so difficult. He doesn't listen at all. He is worse than other kids that I see. Is it his age and personality or do I suck as a parent? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:49 PM Flag
[ - ] My husband wants to do anal sex with me but he is so big 2 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:12 PM Flag
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lots of lube & go slow [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:13 PM Flag
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mine is pretty small and I still don't want to do it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:17 PM Flag
[ - ] Are you team Bieber or Bloom? 5 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:10 PM Flag
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Bloom, obv. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:12 PM Flag
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bloom duh [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:23 PM Flag
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is anyone over the age of 13 team bieber, other than his trashy mom and dad? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:17 PM Flag
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Leopold? Judy? Need more info, though either way I wouldn't be on team Bieber. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:31 PM Flag
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Bloooooom Booom! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:32 PM Flag
[ - ] SEEMA KALIA here--have some free time this weekend and am trying to organize an ass rimming and butt sucking party at my digs. Anyone interested get back to me. My tongue is twitching at the thought of penetrating a mans unwashed ripe and dirty anus 10 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 02:52 PM Flag
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Oink [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 02:55 PM Flag
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oh jesus she's back [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:11 PM Flag
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OP: Thats right, I have returned. I was released from Rikers on March 10th after 6 months in that place and I am finally on my feet again and just looking for other women in Manhattan who like to rim men. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:02 PM Flag
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I do, how do I get in contact with you? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:08 PM Flag
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OP: Meet me at the Plaza tomorrow morning at 9am--I will be wearing a brown exercise suit and white running shoes. I will have a pink scarf on my head so you can recognize me [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:35 PM Flag
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This is one strange post [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:12 PM Flag
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It's a serial poster [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:27 PM Flag
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OP:I am not a serial poster!!!!!. I am Seema Kalia and you will bow before me and beg forgiveness for being so insolent [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:32 PM Flag
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sure thing you british nutcase [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:47 PM Flag
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She's mentally ill. Smile and nod. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:37 PM Flag
[ - ] Any psychology moms on? Substance abuse experts? A long time ago, I became very good friends with a co-worker. We were waiting tables at a corporate dining room. He was waiting to learn if he had been accepted into the Police Academy in NY. He liked to smoke pot, but stayed clean so that he could pass the drug test. The PA rejected him. He started smoking pot again. Suddenly one morning he started giving me the silent treatment. Friends told me that he was furious at me, but that he wouldn't tell them (or me) what I had done, that I "knew exactly what I had done to piss him off." The anger escalated to the point where he became almost violent. I quit my job to get away from him. I still don't know what I did. I apologized over and over again, saying, I don't know what I did, but I am really sorry. I miss our friendship. Do you think the pot made him paranoid, or could he have been schizophrenic? A friend told me that he later became confrontational with another friend/coworker. TIA. 12 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 02:52 PM Flag
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Sounds like he has an anger management issue (with or without pot). [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:07 PM Flag
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Pot doesn't make you angry. SOmething else is wong with him. Does he think you ratted him out for smoking and caused him to lose the job? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:09 PM Flag
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OR: that was my first thought when I read OP's post. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:10 PM Flag
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OP: no, he still had a job there when I quit. Also, a lot of employees smoked pot, even one of the asst managers. Everyone knew about the use of pot and no one seemed to care. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:12 PM Flag
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I don't think its the weed. If anything that would make him more easygoing. Something else is going on. I'd either write him off or directly ask him what it is he thinks you did. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:18 PM Flag
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We are no longer in contact. I begged him to tell me what I did. He refused. I am just still curious to know if it was schizophrenia. I saw an episode of ER. This really nice guy (David krumholtz) flips out and stabs Lucy. They learned he was schiz, so I thought maybe my friend was, too. Wondering if a psych mom could confirm. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:34 PM Flag
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OP: At the beginning of our friendship, he was so easy-going, friendly, could laugh at himself. We made each other laugh constantly. He was someone who could calm everyone down when things became stressful. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:03 PM Flag
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He failed because he was nuts [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:11 PM Flag
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OP: hee, hee. Yes. There is good chance he did not pass the psych evaluation. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:19 PM Flag
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Sounds like you inflicted some narcissistic injury on him (not your fault, just how he perceived it). He sounds mentally disturbed and possibly dangerous (you say he "became almost violent"). I would stay away from him and not have any contact with him. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:41 PM Flag
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OP: thank you for responding. I googled narcissistic injury. Very interesting. Yeah, he had a big rack of silverware and slammed it down on the industrial metal counter where I was folding napkins. He was about 6'3" weighed about 250. I'm 5'8" and 130 He bent down and stick his face in mine, three inches from my nose and hissed, "You better watch it." [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:47 PM Flag
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^^^stuck, not stick. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:37 PM Flag
[ - ] Hamas is scary 2 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 02:51 PM Flag
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Not as scary as shopping at Whole Foods and seeing Seema Kalia coming towards you......I shudder at the thought of that [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 02:57 PM Flag
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It would be scarier if she is coming behind you [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:00 PM Flag
[ - ] Would you feel upset by this? DH rarely spends time with me and dd due to work (and his lack of interest). His brother invited him (and us but only discussed with dh) to spend weekend at his second home. I already had plans with dd so dh decides to just go without us b/c "what am I going to do all weekend. Wait around for you and dd to finish your activities." I told him "whatever. he can go." But I feel sad that he's leaving me and dd alone for the weekend when he so rarely spends time with us. Am I being sensitive? 40 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 02:49 PM Flag
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This is way bigger than a weekend away. Personally, I probably would have changed my plans and gone with DH. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 02:52 PM Flag
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It sounds like he's being an ass, and you both have communication issues if he thinks the activities are Yours and the kids. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 02:41 PM Flag
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Did you tell him about your plans with DD? Invite him to join? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 02:54 PM Flag
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Did you have plans with DD without him? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 02:54 PM Flag
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Why didn't you cancel your plans? Why were you expecting him to wait for you at home? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 02:46 PM Flag
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op: because it's what he does every weekend. He lounges around the apt all day while I'm running errands and taking dc for fun activities. He rarely wants to join so I'm not going to sit around waiting for him. I scoop up my kids and go. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:00 PM Flag
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Because he is tired, working all week is exhausting, Jesus, you sound like a needy housewife. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:18 PM Flag
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A placement test is not fun [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:22 PM Flag
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Hi dh [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:42 PM Flag
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what were the plans with DD? Could you have changed them? I understand though, you probably hoped he would try and beg you two to go, I would have hoped the same thing. I'm sorry. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 02:46 PM Flag
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op: I'm taking dd to take a placement test for an enrichment class that she's going to begin in Fall so it's not a fun thing, and I didn't want to cancel it since I'm really interested that she take this class and don't want to prolong it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 02:59 PM Flag
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I don't get it; you don't want to cancel it but you want DH to... what? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:00 PM Flag
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op: I want dh to WANT to stay home with us. I want him to WANT to do fun things with us. I want him to think "hey, my wife and kids can't come. Maybe I should skip this one." His brother is also married w/ kids, and I'm pretty sure that his brother wouldn't go if his wife and kids couldn't come. His brother would just skip it. Whereas, it's very easy for my dh to just say "oh, wife and kids can't come, but I'm there." [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:02 PM Flag
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NP- I totally understand this. At least act like he wants to stay with you. I don't think you're off base here at all. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 02:53 PM Flag
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Why don't you WANT to go with DH? He spent all week working, and taking DD to an "enrichment" class is NOT a fun activity and it's obviously something that is only important to you. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:04 PM Flag
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its a placement test, not an activity. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:08 PM Flag
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same difference [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:09 PM Flag
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I disagree. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:20 PM Flag
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Yeah I can see how you're totally reasonable and DH wants to spend time with you. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:22 PM Flag
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I'm not the OP. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:18 PM Flag
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Sorry, you should cancel and go. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:02 PM Flag
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No way. DH should say WE have an appointment that we can't change but my family would love to visit on another weekend when WE are all available. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:10 PM Flag
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NP. It's an effing placement test for an enrichment class which is an optional activity! I'm pretty sure OP could easily reschedule the appointment. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:07 PM Flag
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Do you work, too? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 02:58 PM Flag
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You know the answer [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:09 PM Flag
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I think a little - but you guys have issues it sounds like....why can't you go after the placement test? and have you checked to see if they have additional tests? Some how you have to get on the same page, pick a time when you are not upset, tired or pmsing and speak to him about how you would really enjoy having him around more on the weekends to do things with both you and dd [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:01 PM Flag
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How is he going spend time with you, if you are taking your dd to a test, do you mean having fun by himself at the house waiting for you to arrive? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:16 PM Flag
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He should go with them since he's their walking ATM [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:23 PM Flag
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Maybe you should work as well, so he would have more time to spend time with the kids. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:06 PM Flag
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That makes zero sense and you know it. Very few people have jobs they can just scale up or down by 20% on a whim. If her DH works long hours, he is also likely in an industry where the tradeoff for shorter hours is a job change and a massive paycut that he doesn't want to take either. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:14 PM Flag
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I'm sorry but zero sense? Not OR but DH did precisely did - turned down a promotion so he can spend more time with the DCs. I'm not saying every family is like this or even has to be like this, but it's certainly not beyond the realm of possibility that sole wage earners face more pressure to put in the hours. You might as well just say OP married a workaholic for his money if you want to make wild claims. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:27 PM Flag
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It is exceedingly rare job that pays well but allows you to turn down promotions with no consequences. Fine. Zero was the wrong number but it's not too far off. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:32 PM Flag
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I'm with you OP. Sounds like she has a test in the middle of the day Saturday that would preclude going anywhere for the weekend but that still leaves most of the weekend free for family time. Your DH sounds like a bit of a jerk. Only caveat would be if you could reschedule for next weekend and are trying to make a point. Sounds like the weekend with BIL family would be much more fun for everyone. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:12 PM Flag
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clearly there is much more to this than just this weekend. i think that you guys probably have let yourselves fall into these patterns of behavior that are not productive to the family unit. some of it is just how things played out. you probably didn't mind sitting around on the weekends so much when you were younger and didn't have dc. he resents how you just go do stuff that he's not interested in doing without him. you see that he is not interested so you don't push him to find things to do with dc that he would find interesting. Some parents are good at just doing stuff that the kids are interested in and maybe they enjoy it too or they just suck it up better. Some parents aren't good at that (me for instance). so, now there is this family dynamic that is unhealthy because it's you and dc versus dh. you need to break out of this cycle and engage with each other (maybe also therapy) but do it on common terms, not just yours or his or dc's. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:15 PM Flag
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You sound like you guys have some major issues. I think you are both in the wrong. You should have rescheduled that appointment (really, that's the best you do - a placement appointment for an enrichment class???) and he should have asked you to go with him to his brother's instead of telling you he'll go without you. How hard would it have been to schedule that appointment? You are giving up a chance to spend a weekend with family for 1 stupid appointment. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:32 PM Flag
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You sound like you guys have some major issues. I think you are both in the wrong. You should have rescheduled that appointment (really, that's the best you do - a placement appointment for an enrichment class???) and he should have asked you to go with him to his brother's instead of telling you he'll go without you. How hard would it have been to schedule that appointment? You are giving up a chance to spend a weekend with family for 1 stupid appointment. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:32 PM Flag
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You are, unfortunately, falling into the trap that lots of married people fall into. You think your husband should be your best friend, your soulmate, your confidant and supporter and there for you at all times. You think he should WANT to stay home with you, and do whatever it is that you have planned. That he should be sitting at work right now thinking "only a few more hours until I can get home and devote all my attention to my wonderful family!!!" That's bullshit. No one is like that. Just the same way that you're not sitting at home thinking "only a few more hours until I get to go to a vacation house with my husband! It will make him so happy to have relaxing time with his brother!" If you're being self-aware, you'll realize that the problem is that you want him to do what YOU want him to do, without hesitation. And he probably wants to make you happy, but doesn't really want to give up a fun weekend with his brother to take your kid to an enrichment test. (P.S. - your kid would rather go to a vacation house, too.) So what's he to do? If he says "oh, you know, why don't you just come with me?" he knows you'll make a stink and say "you never want to spend time with us!" If he acquiesces and does what you want him to do he'll be bored silly and pissed that he missed out on a fun weekend. The answer is for both of you to be up front about this - you say "hey, look, I know you want to spend time with your brother, and that would be fun, but this test has been scheduled for a while." And then he should say " How about if I take the initiative to reschedule the test - does that work for you?" We have this problem all the time in my house because my wife and I both have very busy and active families who regularly have competing "events" that we're supposed to attend. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:35 PM Flag
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OP, I hope you read that. The key to your marriage's future might be in this response. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:37 PM Flag
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Sorry, but I'm with DH on this one. I would reschedule the testing and enjoy a weekend together with my husband, daughter and family! That sounds much more fun and a way for you guys to get away and relax and be together. Why should he want to sit around and wait for you just because you had those plans first. Sounds like these new plans are much more fun for everyone and would make everyone happy. It's the summer! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:38 PM Flag
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My dh said your dh is a moron and go ahead and divorce him now. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.01.14, 03:41 PM Flag
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