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[ - ] DH just bought a rowing machine for us to use. What kind of body changes can I expect? 5 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 01:24 PM Flag
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I'm guessing great arms. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 01:25 PM Flag
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Broken toes from tripping over it [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 01:27 PM Flag
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lol [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 01:32 PM Flag
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You'll turn into Claire Underwood with enough use. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 01:29 PM Flag
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Used properly, stronger legs, core and back. I adore a good rowing machine. Is it the kind with the big flywheel? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 01:30 PM Flag
[ - ] How old are you and how many children do you have? Do you wish you had more? If so, how many? 9 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 01:18 PM Flag
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34 and one child. I'm happy with one child. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 01:21 PM Flag
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50, 1, yes [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 01:21 PM Flag
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36/3. I would have had one more if I started earlier, but I am content with the 3 I have now. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 01:23 PM Flag
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51; 1; no. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 01:23 PM Flag
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+1, same age and thrilled to have an only. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 01:27 PM Flag
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39,2,yes. I would have one more if I were younger [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 01:25 PM Flag
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early 50s, 4, nope [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 01:29 PM Flag
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35, 1, yes: 1. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 01:31 PM Flag
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42, delighted with one child [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 01:36 PM Flag
[ - ] Any recommendations for digital watch for a 9 year old? Teacher thinks might help keep track of time during ELA. TIA! 4 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 01:17 PM Flag
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Teacher is stupid [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 01:22 PM Flag
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Isnt there a clock in room, cannot DC not tell time? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 01:23 PM Flag
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I'm old fashioned, I guess, but I still think clock faces are important. Digital when older, but the kid should be able to read time "manually." [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 01:25 PM Flag
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Why? So he can waste time by constantly looking at his watch. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 01:36 PM Flag
[ - ] No overnight spam? This is a first. 4 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 01:13 PM Flag
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Don't jinx it!! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 01:14 PM Flag
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Op: oops, just saw the post above mine...I think I did jinx it! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 01:15 PM Flag
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I think that person is playing with you, but there is never spam on sundays :) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 01:17 PM Flag
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like this every sunday morning! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 01:17 PM Flag
[ - ] At some point in the last year or two I think I managed to probably tear something in my shoulder, probably while pulling something. Since then it acts up when I'm pulling other things, such as pulling wet laundry out of the washer or lifting heavy grocery bags onto the counter. I am not an athlete and am not incapacitated, so don't think I need surgery, but I wondered if anyone else deals with something like this and what you do for it. Rest it? Do special exercises? Take an aleve or something? 2 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 01:09 PM Flag
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It's rotator cuff probably. Sometimes frozen shoulder. Mine was like yours for a while and one day I was pushing something in the closet and it hurt and I lost lots of mobility. I did not have surgery. I got steroid shot and pt. I know you hope it goes away - but it's probably not. Go to do a at NYU if it gets worse sorry [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 01:16 PM Flag
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Thanks, maybe I just need to start being left-handed when I can. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 01:36 PM Flag
[ - ] Just had a positive pregnancy test! But was recently on a ski trip where I drank quite a bit and went in the hot tub every day... How bad could that be?? 13 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 01:00 PM Flag
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Let us know [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 01:02 PM Flag
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it's fine [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 01:04 PM Flag
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Unlikely that it will affect the fetus, but it does not bode well for your future parenting skills. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 01:02 PM Flag
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Bitch alert. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 01:07 PM Flag
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NP: ahhh. Can't take it? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 01:12 PM Flag
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Welcome to parenting OP - stupid judgment everywhere [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 01:08 PM Flag
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Welcome to talking about parenting on UB...if you give your kid a juice box you're an idiot setting her up for obesity, and if you refuse to let him have one you're obsessive and setting her up to binge later. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 01:13 PM Flag
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^^congrats be, will be fine!! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 01:14 PM Flag
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Welcome to UB. Welcome to life. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 01:14 PM Flag
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Fine. Gl with your pregnancy and don't stress about what you did before you knew. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 01:06 PM Flag
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totally fine- so early [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 01:06 PM Flag
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You are good. Don't worry about it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 01:07 PM Flag
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There is nothing you can do but stress is not good for pregnancy. Resolve to live healthfully for the rest and move on [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 01:09 PM Flag
[ - ] Was there a sports finals last night? 3 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 12:56 PM Flag
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Cricket World Cup final; Australia beat New Zealand [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 12:58 PM Flag
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OI, OI, OI! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 01:02 PM Flag
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March madness game [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 01:00 PM Flag
[ - ] Has anyone's dh not been able to finish while TTC? Never happened until now. 8 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 12:55 PM Flag
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He's over the scheduled, unsexy sex? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 12:59 PM Flag
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Could be but I was really trying to make it nbd even though I am slightly nervous as well. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 01:05 PM Flag
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It's not about you. It's about TTC. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 01:09 PM Flag
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DH: it becomes a chore and not sexy. Yes. I had to take Viagra even though I'm off the charts virile with high libido. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 01:03 PM Flag
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And nothing to do with no longer finding wife sexy, right? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 01:04 PM Flag
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Self-diagnosed as 'off the charts' I presume? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 01:05 PM Flag
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I think it means "watches a lot of porn" [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 01:10 PM Flag
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Men don't respond well to repeated pressure to perform. In addition, the longer it takes the more they worry they are shooting blanks. Stop talking about. Seriously. No talking about it. Just do it whenever he can. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 01:19 PM Flag
[ - ] SAHMs with a side line business, what is it and how much do you earn with it? 14 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 12:45 PM Flag
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Not sure it really is a "side line business", but I run a small nonprofit part time and am otherwise a sahm. I make $75K. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 12:49 PM Flag
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Wow. that's great! How man hours? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 12:50 PM Flag
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Depends on the time of year and week, but between 10-30, I do a lot at night and on weekends while kids are sleeping. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 12:53 PM Flag
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what kind of a non profit? is 75k the cut you give yourself of the donations [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 01:03 PM Flag
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No. It's a foundation that is fully funded by a family (years ago). 75k is my salary. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 01:05 PM Flag
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very cool. your family? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 01:06 PM Flag
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No. Family friends of a sort. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 01:11 PM Flag
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so the rich get richer. Why bother responding to this post, most people do not have this opportunity. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 01:14 PM Flag
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Exactly. I run a not for profit and people like this annoy me. Because I make not a whole lot more than her to go to work every day and kiss the ass of dilletantes like her. Imagine having to take criticism from a person whose sole qualification is knowing rich people. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 01:25 PM Flag
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Yeah I'm sure she has no education or experience. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 01:28 PM Flag
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Wow, so bitter. Sounds like you need to change jobs. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 01:35 PM Flag
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seriously, shut up. get better contacts if you are jealous. i think this is an interesting response because i like to know how people make money, even if that specific opportunity is not available to me. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 01:35 PM Flag
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Huh? I never said I had money (I don't, other than my salary). I got the job because I had many years of experience in the field where they donate, and a few years of nfp experience working for a large organization. I had known the parents of the current trustees when I was a child - they were involved in a mentor ship program I attended. Their former director is someone I worked with early jn my career and she suggested me for the job when she retired. The post was asking for experiences of people who don't work ft. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 01:34 PM Flag
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ignore those jealous hens. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 01:35 PM Flag
[ - ] S/o Do many people speak to a hundred candidates on the phone her looking for a nanny/housekeeper? And then interview 10-15 in person? 3 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 12:38 PM Flag
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I talk to 5, interview 3 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 12:45 PM Flag
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No. I talked to maybe 10, interviewed 6-7. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 12:50 PM Flag
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i'm curious what kind of listing receives 100 responses [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 01:07 PM Flag
[ - ] I think DH may have been fired from his job. He has been coming home for long lunches with me everyday and comes home early every night. He has also been a lot more careful with money. He has never been this way in the past because we both have successful careers. 15 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 12:05 PM Flag
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If you have a successful career, how does he come home for long lunches with you everyday? Wouldn't you be at work too? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 12:08 PM Flag
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np. That's what I thought. OP why are you home to know when he's coming home early, and why are you home at lunch? Aren't you at your job. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 12:53 PM Flag
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Why wouldn't he just tell you? What is his job? Try asking him. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 12:09 PM Flag
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call him at the work office number [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 12:17 PM Flag
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Shut your mouth with your logical answer [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 12:54 PM Flag
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Right? Way to ruin a fake post. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 12:58 PM Flag
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:-) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 01:07 PM Flag
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I am guessing something has happened. Maybe his firm lost some work or a big client. Maybe he has been given x months to look. Be gentle, but get him to talk. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 12:18 PM Flag
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Why not ask him? If he has been fired he needs to let people know so he can network and get another job. Getting fired is not a big deal but if he cam't tell people -- that is problematic. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 12:25 PM Flag
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This. The problem is when he uses his severance or notice time to mope, instead of ramping up job search. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 12:45 PM Flag
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Where does his paycheck get deposited? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 12:58 PM Flag
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amen, sister [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 01:07 PM Flag
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so ask him why he is coming home so often...don't you guys speak to each other? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 12:59 PM Flag
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Btdt; GL, be supportive and calm, he needs you right now. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 01:02 PM Flag
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+1 and kudos to you that he is coming home for long lunches, not sitting at a bar or fluffing his ego up with some 25 year old thing. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 01:04 PM Flag
[ - ] RE people, I'm offered a one year renewal lease for 3,000 or two year lease for 3050....I do want to stay for 2 years. So I would be stupid not to take the two year lease, right? Or is the rent bubble going to burst one year from now? 12 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 11:57 AM Flag
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I do not see rent bubble bursting. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 12:02 PM Flag
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Not in the 3K per month range [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 12:16 PM Flag
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Tell us more about the apt -- size and general location. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 12:19 PM Flag
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one bedroom, westside, downtown [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 01:14 PM Flag
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about 700 sf [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 01:14 PM Flag
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doorman, gym [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 01:14 PM Flag
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I always just take the one. I have a December expiration -- they never raise it because it's so hard to get renters in December. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 12:28 PM Flag
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Interesting response, but totally non-responsive to OP. If she is being offered lease now, that means May or June lease. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 12:36 PM Flag
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NP. Totally responsive. Said differently, I always take the shorter lease, but here is something about my situation that influences this decision for your consideration. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 12:59 PM Flag
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np It's a good response. OP should offer an 18-month renewal at 3,000. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 12:59 PM Flag
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Landlords are not required to offer 18 month lease, and I doubt they will. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 01:02 PM Flag
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won't hurt for OP to ask [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 01:08 PM Flag
[ - ] My FIL had a disability that makes his walking unsteady. He also is a very proud and headstrong person who views himself very much the "patriarch". I will be out of town next month and he and MIL will be here with 8 month old dc. Nanny will still be here full time. I have major concerns about him carrying dc up and down our steep stairs. Thus far, I've been able to circumvent it by doing it myself or running over to "help" him when he starts to. It makes me angry he can't see how dangerous it is. What should I do? Tell him that he should not be carrying dc up and down stairs? Tell MIL (who is totally weak willed?) tell nanny? 26 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 11:45 AM Flag
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you need to make different child care arrangements. you are not comfortable with this one and con't control what happens when you are not there. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 11:48 AM Flag
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where is dh? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 11:49 AM Flag
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DH will be working. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 11:50 AM Flag
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does he share your same fears? if so, he needs to speak to his parents [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 11:56 AM Flag
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ffs - when you see him doing it, just say "please don't carry him up the stairs, you are too unsteady" [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 12:00 PM Flag
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You have to understand, this level of direct challenge would rock the world order of my fucked up inlaws. I bite my tongue on all levels of things, for the sake of family harmony, but this situation has me worried. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 12:04 PM Flag
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As I said, yo have to make other arrangements. Can MIL travel with you? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 12:05 PM Flag
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No. I have Childcare arrangements with the nanny. They are coming bc we have a terrible relationship and I try to be away when they are here. Everyone is happier. I want kids to know in laws, but I can't stand them [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 12:20 PM Flag
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get your dh behind you on this one if you feel that strongly about it, if you are not willing to speak up, then it must not be that important [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 12:07 PM Flag
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Op sounds as weak willed as her MIL... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 12:09 PM Flag
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Op sounds as weak willed as her MIL... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 12:09 PM Flag
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Np- Stop seeing this as some sort of soap opera story line and see it for what it is- a person with a disability that causes him to fall often WILL fall while holding your baby. Let him hold her while sitting on the couch. Hate to tell you this, but this is the easiest of problems you will likely encounter as a new mom. Good luck. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 12:09 PM Flag
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Np: I disagree, because this is a problem of family dynamics, not about being a new mom. OP has said she's worried about the time she's not there, not the time when she can set the baby in his lap. And that she is risking ww3 by challenging him on his ability to carry the baby. She knows that it's likely that he'll drop the baby, she's asking about how to manage this difficult family dynamic. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 12:16 PM Flag
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OP: Thank you, I really appreciate your understanding of the situation. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 12:24 PM Flag
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she is doing a disservice to everyone by keeping her mouth shut and scurrying around like a mouse to make sure fil does not carry baby up stairs - op needs to use words and communicate. How are people to know this upsets her? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 12:55 PM Flag
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This is my third dc [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 12:18 PM Flag
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Get DH to speak to him in private. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 12:18 PM Flag
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You either have to face him and tell him, have DH tell him (could backfire if DH wimps out) or have nanny on board with you to get DB up the stairs. Which sounds most plausible to you? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 12:19 PM Flag
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Agreed, this is one of those times you have to be an advocate for your kid. It's a tough one, but you can do it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 12:20 PM Flag
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OP: I think you are right and I will ask DH to say something. We just moved into this house, so wasn't a problem with older two dc [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 12:23 PM Flag
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Your DBs safety and wellbeing is more important than your FILs ego [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 12:31 PM Flag
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Np: THIS. My DH once told my mother (who had gotten unsteady) that she shouldn't be carrying our 2 year old downstairs, way too heavy for her. She didn't like it , but needed to be said. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 01:24 PM Flag
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Maybe tell nanny, but phrase it to your in laws as they are there to provide love and enrichment, and the nanny is being paid to make it easier for them to relax and enjoy their time with their grandchild. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 12:49 PM Flag
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That won't cut it [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 12:58 PM Flag
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Being a mom means sometimes having to do the hard things for your child's welfare. Say it early and as often as necessary. Signed, stepmom of child whose mom used him too much for help, and he accidentally tripped and dropped his little brother as an infant, resulting in broken bones. Very traumatic for poor stepson. He was only 11 at the time. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 12:56 PM Flag
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i'm sorry. that sounds very sad. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 01:11 PM Flag
[ - ] More nanny issues: Nanny is being paid FT wages. She works mostly part time, and is supposed to be available on snow days, sick/convalescent days, school holidays, etc. I ask her to come in at 8am one day then don't leave for work till 9:30 (after running an errand for sick DC), and she texts me that she is annoyed that I asked her to come in when I am still there, and I should have more respect for her time. Same nanny goes out of town for the weekend, returning just before she is supposed to pick DC up from school at 12:30 on Monday, frequently. Eventually I need her to be there one Monday morning bc of snow day, and she is not available, and I have to stay home from work bc she is out of town. I tell her this is unacceptable, and she fires back that she doesn't work Monday mornings. WDYT/D? 43 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 11:34 AM Flag
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Had same only nanny constantly made doctors appointments during after-school hours or school breaks...also was annoyed if I was home and just didn't care if kids at that point making it impossible for me to get anything done so I had to go to library to do our taxes for example. Long story shirt: I hire housekeeper nanny who works ft, makes $200 less a week than old nanny and does ALL housekeeping + always there to do childcare. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 11:39 AM Flag
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np: How did you find the housekeeper nanny? This is exactly what I need/want. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 11:43 AM Flag
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Posted an ad on care and sitter. Got a million responses, interview a 100 people over phone and maybe 15/20 in person. Did weekend trial. It was a pain but I made sure she could cook well, was quick and good enough with the kids + easy to manage. It was pain but worth it at the end. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 11:46 AM Flag
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Thanks, it is tough to weed through all the responses on care - but I did it for evening sitters and it was so worth it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 11:50 AM Flag
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^ is this same nanny who used your computer? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 11:47 AM Flag
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yes [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 11:52 AM Flag
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I tend to give nannies the benefit of the doubt but this one sounds like a problem. You should be better at managing her though. She is being paid for those hours, that is how you are respecting her time. What you are doing doesn't matter, etc. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 11:45 AM Flag
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This is exactly what i told her. She talks back like she is the manager, tells me what I am doing wrong. I am admittedly a non-confrontational person & bad manager, but have made these expectations clear, reminded her she IS being paid for her time, and taken exception to her attitude. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 11:50 AM Flag
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get a new nanny and set expectations up from the beginning - or if you think you can reset boundaries with this one go for it - but you have to speak up and remind her what the expectations are [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 11:47 AM Flag
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OP did set expectations. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 11:56 AM Flag
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does not sound like it if nanny thinks she gets monday mornings off [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 12:05 PM Flag
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most of the time it doesn't matter. Occasionally she will text me "oh, my bus is getting in late" then I have to keep him in after school for an hour or whatever. This time it was a full-on morning, and she was out of town. She says not her faulty bc her bus was delayed by snow, I maintain she knew storm was coming and should have planned to be home ahead of it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 12:09 PM Flag
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How is this even a question? fire yesterday. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 11:47 AM Flag
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T.H.I.S. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 11:49 AM Flag
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+10000 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 12:32 PM Flag
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Agreed [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 11:56 AM Flag
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OP: I did and feel so much better, just reality testing here. Have a temp replacement & now starting the whole process over gain, sigh. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 12:05 PM Flag
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What did nanny say? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 12:21 PM Flag
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Np* [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 12:21 PM Flag
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I told her we don't need someone FT any more and she offered to do us the favor of staying on PT until we find a replacement. No thanks. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 12:28 PM Flag
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Nanny with this schedule: Because I'm typically not required to work during the day, I schedule Dr/dentist/ad hoc appointments that aren't always easy to reschedule. I have been told to be available for certain things at the last minute. The one time there was a conflict I asked my boss if a readjustment was possible, her dh made it clear it was a huge burden for HIM (who I never see or hear from fwiw). This arrangement has its advantages but people have the expectation of owning your ass, even over trivially flexible things. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 12:01 PM Flag
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If someone works a schedule, they are expected to be there as needed unless they have requested vacation or are sick, etc. that doesn't really seem like ownership. If you must schedule appointments during what are work hours, make a leave request. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 12:04 PM Flag
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This. You are being paid to be "on call" - that is the arrangement. On call means that if you are needed during that time, you go in. Imagine an "on call" doctor who says, oh sorry, I can't make it to that emergency, I have something else planned because I'm not usually needed at that time? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 12:10 PM Flag
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Exactly! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 12:10 PM Flag
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"Can I finish the back nine first, I didn't think you would have patients at the hospital today" [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 12:13 PM Flag
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If they are paying you to be available FT and you are cashing the checks, they do own your ass for that time. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 12:06 PM Flag
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The job I took was billed as 'lots of paid free time'. The words 'on call' weren't spoken of nor are on my contract. They can think they own me if they want. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 12:22 PM Flag
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You don't deserve your salary with this attitude. You are taking advantage of the terms of your employment. You DO have lots of paid free time -- you don't get to control every aspect of it. I'm sure your employers would be happy to pay you PT for the hours you actually work and save s ton of $. Bitch. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 12:30 PM Flag
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This is one aspect of my attitude. The others are that I'm at work at 4am when and if they need me. And I leave whenever they get home, often with no notice of my finish time. Bitch yourself. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 12:34 PM Flag
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You seem to really love your job. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 12:41 PM Flag
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So find a corporate 9-5 job with 2 weeks of paid vacation and stop complaining. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 12:43 PM Flag
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oops, then she would have to pay taxes. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 12:43 PM Flag
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Who's up for more complications? A nanny who doesn't pay income tax or an employer who doesn't pay payroll tax? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 12:46 PM Flag
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Employer usually. However, that isn't the point of the post. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 12:48 PM Flag
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Perfect example of nanny attitude problem. The more you give, the more you take. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 12:13 PM Flag
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Please. Five years and one conflict equals attitude problem? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 12:29 PM Flag
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It is more than one conflict. It is constant conflict. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 12:41 PM Flag
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Fire my ass?! Constant conflict sounds unbearable. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 12:43 PM Flag
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You seem to be confused about who is the employee in your situation. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 12:34 PM Flag
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Where's the confusion? I'm moaning about a shitting incident to do with my bosses. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 12:37 PM Flag
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You mean your being a shit? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 01:17 PM Flag
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Your shitting me. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 01:30 PM Flag
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OK, hijacker [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 12:48 PM Flag
[ - ] Nanny has been told not to use by desktop computer to show DC movies. DH and I do use it for this but I have asked her not to. She still does, and when I confront her on it, launches into explanation of why it is ok bc we do it, and bc she only accesses netflix. I repeatedly tell her that the point is she has been asked not to, and is still doing it. She continues to argue. WWYT/D? 20 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 10:39 AM Flag
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^my desktop computer. has all my personal info on it, photos, everything. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 10:40 AM Flag
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Password protect it and don't share password with her. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 10:42 AM Flag
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this [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 11:10 AM Flag
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OP: I did this, but then sometime unlock it and forget to rechange [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 11:27 AM Flag
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just log out when you are done [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 11:29 AM Flag
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I replied below about replacing. Here is why: your nanny is showing your dcs that it is ok to disregard your wishes and to not do what you say. I am sure there are more examples of this than just the computer given your description. She thinks she knows best and your wishes are irrelevant [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 11:32 AM Flag
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Yup, see my second post above. SHe has this attitude that she is in charge even directly disregarding things I ask her to do, talking back, etc. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 11:35 AM Flag
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Licking computer etc is not the solution to this problem. You know what you need to do... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 11:40 AM Flag
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lol licking the computer solves so little these days. funny typo! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 11:45 AM Flag
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:) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 11:47 AM Flag
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I have similar issue and I am going to replace her [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 11:10 AM Flag
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Give the kids their own iPad or Kindle Fire to watch Netflix [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 11:28 AM Flag
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omg i don't have an iPad myself, not getting one for kids. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 11:36 AM Flag
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You sound like a PITA to work for. I would hate it if you were my mom. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 11:39 AM Flag
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OR from above: UB often advises moms to go to ridiculous lengths to accommodate shitty nannies and accusing moms of being PITAs, bad managers or not being able to afford nanny. When occupations like that start you know the posters are just out to flame and most likely never employed a ft nanny or are themselves a nanny [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 11:44 AM Flag
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^Accusations [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 11:48 AM Flag
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you sound spoiled. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 11:44 AM Flag
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any my DC is 4, does not need an iPad or any electronic gadget to entertain himself, thanks. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 11:44 AM Flag
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ok teenager. shouldn't you be studying? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 11:53 AM Flag
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this is not the right nanny for you guys [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 11:42 AM Flag
[ - ] Big fight with DH. We had awesome party tonight that was for kids and parents and had easter egg dyeing and ee hunt and ribs and tons appetizers. All was great but after they left DH was tired and in shitty mood and said i was a bad person because I never wanted more children. Granted we dated on and off since 2007 and could have had at least three but he proposed to me finally in sept of 2011 (while we were both 41) and got pregnant at first try dec 2011 had and emergency sect summer 2012. I told him immediately to do some research on harvesting eggs and surrogates because he was out of work at the time and I had to go back at 42 yrs old and 6 weeks complicated cset. He never did do any research so I assumed he was happy with the great little guy. If you wanted more you would do the leg work right? i assumed that meant he was happy with one. I just turned 45 last week and he is suddenly accusing me of not wanting more children and threatening divorce. wtf? I reminded him of my efforts 3 years ago. don't get it. 12 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 05:31 AM Flag
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OP: Immature guy who is also about 8 year behind where he should be in career. he wrote rec's for people who worked for him 8 years ago and now he is begging for a job from these same people because he took 5 years off. I think it is his midlife crisis of dealing with reality because he was big frat Ivy college athlete and planned to have money thrown at him and wife who could work and home and get paid and have 4 kids! Who would blame or threaten a 45 yr old woman that she can't have more children? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 05:47 AM Flag
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Typical. Those guys peak too early. Then they are pissed when their luck runs out. Sorry OP he sounds like an ass. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 11:24 AM Flag
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he's just tired and wants to be an ass. ignore. next time, tell him you'll start the proceedings yourself for mental exhaustion. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 05:57 AM Flag
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are you the one with the alcoholic mom too? tough gig [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 09:17 AM Flag
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He definitely sounds immature and a bit like he doesn't take responsibility for his life/actions. Have you been to therapy? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 10:44 AM Flag
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you guys don't seem to communicate well - but this outburst I would ignore for a few days and then bring it up when no one is tired or worried about other things [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 11:31 AM Flag
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wait, you told him to do the research on harvesting eggs? and now that's your "effort"? you two are in the passive aggressive club together. stop blaming each other. talk. don't blame. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 11:34 AM Flag
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This. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 11:41 AM Flag
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You two are pretty lousy communicators. I would start taking what he's saying seriously now. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 11:40 AM Flag
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Your husband is a major jerk. Are you happy being married to someone like this? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 11:51 AM Flag
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Sorry. I would not have married the guy who waited until I was 41 to marry me. He showed you who he was in those 4 dating years. I would agree to divorce so you can focus on more rewarding things. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 12:06 PM Flag
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i'm actually jealous that you did your EE hunt this weekend because mine is next weekend and it is supposed to rain on saturday. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.29.15, 01:21 PM Flag
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