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[ - ] A family member miscarried at 20w and delivered a stillborn. What is the best way to comfort her? 2 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 03:12 PM Flag
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Send her some food and go visit. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 03:08 PM Flag
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UGH I am so sorry for your relative's loss. I think that people are so clueless about what to say. Is she going to have any sort of ceremony? Did she name the baby? I think try to use the words she is using -- she lost a child. (I believe in fact it's not a miscarriage this far along, not that terminology matters).... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 03:17 PM Flag
[ - ] Favorite food to eat at Hampton chutney? 0 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 03:03 PM Flag
[ - ] I think having nanny take dc for interviews is a great idea. When ds applied to high schools, he aced all his interviews and got into most schools he applied to. All the admissions directors took ds into private room for interview and then told me he is so nice to talk to/sophisticated. The one interview where the lady left the door wide open for dh and I to hear (HM), ds seemed more reserved and awkward (he didn't get in). I know my kids feel so comfortable around the nannies, and in this situation I think it would be beneficial 9 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 03:01 PM Flag
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Agreed! All my DCs are so much more comfortable around their nanny than around DH and me! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 03:12 PM Flag
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Wow. That is crazy. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 03:08 PM Flag
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Not really. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 03:09 PM Flag
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Who has a nanny for a high school kid? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 03:07 PM Flag
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my thoughts exactly [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 03:14 PM Flag
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Op: I have 4 kids, youngest is almost 6 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 03:09 PM Flag
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You have to apply for High Schools??? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 03:15 PM Flag
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It was grueling. So many essays. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 03:10 PM Flag
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This issue has already been covered by the NY Post (yes, kids do better on interviews with nannies/subordinates than with their absentee parents): http://www.nypost.com/p/news/local/manhattan/poor_li_rich_kids_Lttwpt6HbYd4MKG9YxJEUJ [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 03:16 PM Flag
[ - ] Favorite easy vegetarian recipe? 7 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 03:01 PM Flag
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carrot [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:57 PM Flag
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lol [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 03:05 PM Flag
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Broccoli sauteed with tofu and teriyaki sauce (soy-vay is good). Serve with a side of either quinoa or brown rice. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 03:04 PM Flag
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Black bean and avocado taco recipe from Whole Foods. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 03:00 PM Flag
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Lentil salad with cucumber, basil, carrots, red pepper,scallion, olive oil, salt, pepper, balsamic vinegar, can add pine nuts too" [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 03:02 PM Flag
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Arepas but I add boiled lentils to the mixture and never fry, just pan sear with a little olive oil lentils increase the fiber content and use a condiment Ike salsa to dip. Kids love it [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 03:17 PM Flag
[ - ] How do you get into freelance magazine writing? 1 Reply [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 03:00 PM Flag
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Mgazins are all going bankrupt. Too many writers post on the web [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:58 PM Flag
[ - ] Finance moms ... I have a nest egg of about 300k in the bank that is earning 1%. I do not want to take any risks on it. I keep getting called by an "investment services" guy at my bank who wants to set up a meeting with me. What is he likely trying to sell me and should I just politely decline? Have a full 401k and other well-funded investment accounts, including 529. This is cash on the side that I have accumulated over 20 years. 2 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 03:00 PM Flag
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Don't touch it. Don't have a meeting. That kind of cash is not for a big return, it is for peace of mind. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 03:06 PM Flag
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i am an investment advisor - so buy bonds. blend muni's and corporates, even high yield is ok (not below B), keep the duration short - 3 years. You should be able to achieve a yield of 4%, some of which would be tax exempt. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 03:12 PM Flag
[ - ] Read that Maria Shriver is considering staying with Arnold. Does she have rocks in her head? 12 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:59 PM Flag
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Those Kennedy's are so dumb. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:54 PM Flag
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Not Kennedy's. Kennedies. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 03:01 PM Flag
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np: Lol no it's "Kennedys" [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 03:16 PM Flag
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Lol. Pot:kettle. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 03:01 PM Flag
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It was the fucking autocorrect. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 03:02 PM Flag
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Doesn't mean she will be banging him [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:55 PM Flag
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She's catholic, right? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 03:02 PM Flag
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I'm with my husband for the financial and social life he allows me to enjoy - why shouldn't she be able to as we'll? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:59 PM Flag
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Me, too. I stayed with my husband after his affair. It was not worth it to me to dismantle everything we had over it, neither did he want a divorce. So we didn't get divorced. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 03:04 PM Flag
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Does he still fuck around? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 03:07 PM Flag
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Maria Shriver is a Kennedy. She doesn't need Arnold's Terminator money or invitations to Sylvester Stallone's 4th of July party. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 03:15 PM Flag
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They have a long history of looking the other way while their husbands do whatever they want. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 03:02 PM Flag
[ - ] Can we stop with the maxi dresses??!! No matter how attractive a woman is, they just look tacky. This is the only fashion I've ever observed that actually makes me angry. Not sure why- I just find SO unflattering. 15 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:54 PM Flag
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Me too! But I think that's mostly because I'm too tall to find maxi dresses that fit me and that I wouldn't need to sell my firstborn to be able to afford. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:57 PM Flag
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i dont wear them b/c i'm too short. but i think they look great on the right body type. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:51 PM Flag
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Maybe on you, but I think they look great on other women, me included! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:57 PM Flag
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Disagree. Love 'em. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:58 PM Flag
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I don't like maxi dresses, those stupid knit caps that hipsters wear, or the MC Hammer pants with the saggy crotch. Those seem to be in this season as well. Small fedoras bother me as well. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:53 PM Flag
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oh the knit caps are the WORST!!! f#cking hipsters. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:54 PM Flag
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They're cute and even sexy on the right body. I don't see the problem. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:53 PM Flag
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they are so chic. You must live in the sticks and think that daisy dukes look good on fat arses. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 03:00 PM Flag
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ugh. NP living in NYC/E. Hampton and I think they are chic about .00001% of the time. Most people look like frumps in them. I did see someone wearing an old roberta freyman one at via quadronno yesterday and she looked great. You need to be all of the following to work it: tall, slender, tanned and accessorized [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 03:02 PM Flag
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Love [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 03:02 PM Flag
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nothing wrong with a maxi dress [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:56 PM Flag
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+1 - if you're allowed to choose your wardrobe, then go for it! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 03:01 PM Flag
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Inmate mom? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 03:07 PM Flag
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I think they're awesome. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 03:06 PM Flag
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Well, I'm PG and I'll be wearing them this summer. So no, we can't stop. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 03:02 PM Flag
[ - ] Just found out a co-worker announced her pregnancy...by surrogate! she is Jewish, white, physically healthy and in her early 30s. Why would she have a baby by surrogacy? The woman who will carry her baby will give birth in October. I just find it odd. Isnt this very costly? Why do people do this? 46 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:49 PM Flag
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How do you know that she's physically capable of carrying a child? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:51 PM Flag
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she told me..she works only 5 feet away from me! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 03:09 PM Flag
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None of you business, that's why. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:45 PM Flag
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right? where do you get off thinking you understand her life, OP. step off. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:48 PM Flag
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This is all of our business when it has to do with the exploitation of others. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 03:12 PM Flag
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A friend of mine did this. She just did not want to disrupt her career [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:45 PM Flag
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It is the best gift a dh can give his wife. Freedom from nine months of hell. Wish my dh did it [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:46 PM Flag
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Too bad you thought carrying your dc was hell....hope you don't tell them this [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:53 PM Flag
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Wow, you're a bitch! Too bad your kids are stuck with such a bitch for a caregiver :( [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:49 PM Flag
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No need to carry the embryo to be a great mom [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:57 PM Flag
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Maybe she's unab,emtomcarry a pregnancy to term? Or even get pg [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:51 PM Flag
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^^^unable to carry [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:52 PM Flag
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(A) What does her religion or race have to do with it? (B) How do you know she's physically healthy? (C) Why the hell do you think this is any of your business? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:52 PM Flag
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Has the op ever carried a baby.. It is hard [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:47 PM Flag
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NP: Certain religions have a position on surrogacy so it matters. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:58 PM Flag
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Why does it matter to YOU or to this post? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:59 PM Flag
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It's context - OP didn't have to post this, her coworker didn't have to announce this, and we didn't have to comment. It is interesting though and any additional context makes it more interesting. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 03:04 PM Flag
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Many women cannot carry their own babies. She may have had multiple miscarriages or have something wrong with her uterus. You'll never know the details. Be supportive of her and happy for her - she's probably been through a lot to get to this pregnancy. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:46 PM Flag
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or have been a cancer survivor, a CF or MS or lupus patient, or any one of a number of other conditions that made her unable to conceive or carry. How dare you speculate with judgment about such a thing. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 03:04 PM Flag
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Making it even a worse idea to pass those genes on. Plenty of unloved children in this world people. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 03:10 PM Flag
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I have a friend who did this because she had a chronic disease. Mind your own biz. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:52 PM Flag
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Most women who do this have disease. Some do it for convenience [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:47 PM Flag
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Isn't surrogacy illegal in NY? Is surrogate in another state? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:53 PM Flag
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damn lucky bitch....if I had 30k lying around i would do it [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:53 PM Flag
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This. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:59 PM Flag
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This describes my friend who had been with her DH since college and been TTC for @8years when they finally went w gestational surrogate. Most people don't discuss the trauma of repeated failed fertility treatment with anyone, let alone colleagues. I only knew he extent of it bc her brother accidentally told me about her multiple miscarriages bc he thought I knew. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:55 PM Flag
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Ditto - my cousin had many, many losses (the most recent at 31 weeks, I can't even imagine) before she went the surrogate route. She appears physically healthy, just like this girl, but you have no idea what's going on with anyone - especially a co-worker! Butt out. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:56 PM Flag
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Surrogacy is deplorable - hiring out someone's womb... And I mean in all situations. Adopt a baby. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:55 PM Flag
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This. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 03:04 PM Flag
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Honestly, I don't think it's your business why she did it, but I do find announcing it kind of weird. "Hey, guess what! Another woman is going to go through terrible physical stress and possible emotional pain on my behalf! Isn't that sooooo exciting!" If I were her, I'd wait and just announce the arrival of the baby. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:49 PM Flag
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Bc her employer and colleagues don't need to know in advance that she will be out for maternity leave for several months, right? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:57 PM Flag
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doesnt she get mat leave for 3 months anyway after the baby is born? So she basically gets the benefit of having a nice body AND a baby to cuddle with for 3 months, courtesy of the FMLA laws. And no, I am CF and am surprised since its the first time I have met anyone doing a pregnancy by surrogacy. One reason I dont want kids is because I cant fathom seeing my body change over 9 months. - OP [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 03:14 PM Flag
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Why should she be denied the happiness of the pregnancy and waiting for the baby to arrive? Whenever someone is pregnant at work you have to hear about it 24/7. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:59 PM Flag
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our office is very tight knit and pregnancy announcements are a big deal. We have to tailor our calendar to account for it because my bosses are women and give pregnant workers a lot of flexibility and almost a P/T schedule..so thats why she announced it. - OP [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 03:12 PM Flag
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What does Jewish law say about surrogacy? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:55 PM Flag
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It is ok [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:59 PM Flag
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Based on google the verdict is still out. Many rabbis have stated it is immoral. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 03:05 PM Flag
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np: and what about religion. The mother's religion defines the child's religion. So, I know, an adopted child or one born in a mixed house to a non-Jewish mother has to convert. What about here? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:54 PM Flag
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If the eggs are from jewish woman the babies are jewish [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:56 PM Flag
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A friend used a surrogate after she had breast cancer. Not many people knew about her cancer, so she probably appeared pretty healthy to everyone throughout. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:53 PM Flag
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My daughter froze her eggs. So gestational surrogacy is an easy next step. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 03:00 PM Flag
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If and when my daughter and her husband decide they want children her frozen eggs and his frozen sperm will be sent to the hospital where they are to be combined and implanted in surrogate [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:55 PM Flag
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Plenty of asian countries have surrogates that carry babies for americans. Cost is very reasonable [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:56 PM Flag
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Many married gay men have babies this way [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:57 PM Flag
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I think it is weird when they do it too. There are so many kids that need a good home. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 03:05 PM Flag
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Renting out wombs of the poor... Not only do we keep you at work in garment factories that collapse and kill you we also put our embryos into you as the ultimate insult to human dignity. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 03:07 PM Flag
[ - ] OH NEVER MIND 5 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:49 PM Flag
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Shouted, like a bratty 4 year old [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:45 PM Flag
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are you the entitled 25yo prima donna on my team? because he JUST did that. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:46 PM Flag
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Email him this post so he can see how childish he is [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:57 PM Flag
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he already knows everything. just ask him. he must know about this post already, wouldnt you think? ;-) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:53 PM Flag
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I was just going to snark on someone I don't even know and decided to go with the OH NEVER MIND instead. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:53 PM Flag
[ - ] Ask me for advice and I will give it. 24 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:46 PM Flag
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What time should I start drinking today and why? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:47 PM Flag
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Ask me for real advice. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:49 PM Flag
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Why isn't this real advice? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:44 PM Flag
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Because you want me to enable you to harm yourself or distract yourself from whatever feelings you're trying to avoid. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:51 PM Flag
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NP hahahahhaha oh man, you're the LAST person on earth I would want advice from. Hey Debbie Downer! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:55 PM Flag
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No, would like to meet a man this afternoon - figure a bar might be a good choice to relax as I have the afternoon off. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:49 PM Flag
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Ok, well that's an entirely different kind of question. Sure, go meet him in a bar. Do you already know this guy? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:56 PM Flag
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hi Mormon mom [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:51 PM Flag
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I'm happy with my balance of part time work and home life. My bills are paid, but I'd like to earn more money for savings. thoughts? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:57 PM Flag
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You need to sacrifice one or the other. Don't fall for some online scam to earn more money while at home. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:58 PM Flag
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How should I survive a year away from my DH? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:52 PM Flag
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Start by being accepting the situation sucks and you're working on finding solutions. If it were me I would try to spend more time with my kids, friends, and make sure to get as much hired help as I could afford to get some time off to myself when possible. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 03:00 PM Flag
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Ok, so my job is killing me. The hours are suffocating and not letting me see my 2 year old. I'm the primary earner and have a lot of pressure to maintain my salary, but I just can't take this anymore. My daughter keeps telling me to stay with her and to come home and my heart is broken. My husband is looking in earnest for a job, but has not found anything. It's been several years now and I'm afraid he'll never find anything. I can't afford to leave my job financially, but I can't afford to keep it emotionally. What do I do? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:54 PM Flag
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How do I deal with a SIL who was happy bc she thought we were having financial trouble but is now crying to my mil bc we are going to Europe and putting the kids in private school? Do I get my mil in trouble for telling me? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 03:02 PM Flag
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WTF is wrong with your SIL??? np. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 03:06 PM Flag
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Did you win the lottery or something? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 03:01 PM Flag
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No we were just always frugal, stayed in our starter home. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 03:09 PM Flag
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Ignore, don't let this effect you in any way and carry on happily with your life [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 03:02 PM Flag
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affect, for fuck's sake [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 03:10 PM Flag
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I'm trying to get gaudianship of my 14 year old grandson from the other grandma. My daughter was 14 when she had him. The other grandma is out of control and has been nasty and causing problems for me ever since my grandson asked to live with me. Thinking of dropping the case as she is ruthless and nuts. But I don't want to leave mt grandson there The courts say for is to get along for my grandsons sake. I do all the courts ask yet she lies about me over and over again. What would you do? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:58 PM Flag
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Where is his mother? Can she get involved? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 03:01 PM Flag
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She is involved and is part of the case asking that he live with me [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 03:03 PM Flag
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My daughter has anxiety due to the other grandmother or she would be asking for him back. I'm stronger then her and would allow her to be with her son as much as possible. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 03:05 PM Flag
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Would you give a cup of canola oil to your neighbor? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 03:06 PM Flag
[ - ] I am very angry over the emotional abuse I accepted from my ex. I am in therapy but it doesn't seem to be helping much and I know the anger is negatively affecting all other areas of my life. How can I be done with this forever? I feel like I am allowing him to continue to hurt me by not letting this go. 13 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:39 PM Flag
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Stop beating yourself up, that will only make you more upset. Bravo for recognizing this is an area you need to work on. Give yourself a chance to learn how. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:40 PM Flag
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Go to therapy. Do it for you. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:35 PM Flag
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Good for you to recognize it. Give it the time and attention it deserves. Stay focused on wanting to be rid of the negativity and you'll know when you're ready to let go. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:41 PM Flag
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I was raped by my dad before my fifth birthday. I became a very, very angry child and young adult. One day I woke up and I literally decided to be happy. The anger was tiring. I was TIRED. Two weeks later I met my future husband. He would never have started a relationship with the "cool, angry bitch". I am now married ten years and lead a very peaceful and happy life. I am HAPPY because in that second I decided to let go, everything was good. This anger will fester and infect all things beautiful in your life - just let go of it. Life is amazing and you deserve to experience it. Hugs. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:44 PM Flag
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I am so, so so sorry for this tragedy. Really. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:47 PM Flag
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Omg, that's a horrifying story. Hugs to you and to OP! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:42 PM Flag
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NP I am totally happy and lead a pretty interesting life. I just want people to know that you CAN leave behind anger and pain. You have to be ready to do it though. Life is a spectacular adventure, but with all this anger, you miss out on it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:52 PM Flag
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You are so right. And very inspiring [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:47 PM Flag
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Thank you :) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 03:04 PM Flag
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I am so sorry [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:46 PM Flag
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this is exactly what i needed to read today. thank you. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 03:13 PM Flag
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there is some part of you that believes you brought this on yourself. that somehow by allowing it to continue for as long as it did, you deserved it. and you're actually mad at yourself. work on THAT. because you TOTALLY didnt. assholes are assholes no matter who they date. you are a smart together woman and you never deserved what he gave you. you are better than that. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:45 PM Flag
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it is easier to be angry than sad. once you allow yourself to feel sad about that part of your life, you can move on. i am working on this, for a different situation. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 03:08 PM Flag
[ - ] I hate my dc's teacher. 26 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:35 PM Flag
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Lol...I was just goi g to post something similar [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:35 PM Flag
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This makes me feel better. ;) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:36 PM Flag
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This is my 2nd time with this teacher but a different gendered kid and I think she can't handle boys who don't conform to her extremely mellow ways. My dd was shy and did as she was told. My son is bored with her so she loses his attention. He's 4yr and she can't understand 4 yer olds don't all sit and say yes all day long. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:44 PM Flag
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^^^ he's also much older than most preschool teachers...she's about 70 and I k ow my 70 yr old mom wouldn't have the patience with a class of 18 4yer olds [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:45 PM Flag
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NP It also may be that some kids don't love school all the time. I have a friend whose youngest dd went to the same preschool as the older ones -- same teachers, same routine, same gender, but the kid was like, kicking and screaming before school each day. Not to defend a bad teacher but not every kid loves school [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:55 PM Flag
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upper east side preschool? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 03:14 PM Flag
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Not paying enough attention to your snowflake? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:30 PM Flag
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No, bristly and terrible with kids and adults. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:39 PM Flag
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Is she older? Most older teachers are pretty fed up with this generation of parents. I hear this all the time. I personally have nothing to compare you to so it doesn't annoy me as much. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:34 PM Flag
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And some older teachers should hang it up. I'm an older mom who has teens and preschoolers. Most small kids respond better too teachers who are fun and animated rather than dull and old school [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:49 PM Flag
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ITA. Dc teacher is older and boring [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 03:00 PM Flag
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That is really ageist. I disagree. I think parents should be more open to older teachers advice instead of assuming they are old and cranky. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:55 PM Flag
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your kid is probably a mess. you think they need to "toughen up" don't you? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:36 PM Flag
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No and most kids do. You don't need to cry all the time over everything, being resilient is an important skill. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:39 PM Flag
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Can you stop using that term, snowflake? You sound like a a$$hole. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:59 PM Flag
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^^an a$$hole. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:59 PM Flag
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it is almost the end of the year [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:36 PM Flag
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yes, for everyone [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:40 PM Flag
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Sorry to hear this. Better luck next school year! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:40 PM Flag
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Thank you! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:41 PM Flag
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Same here, she sucks! What a waste if a year. Old, lazy, and grouchy [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:43 PM Flag
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Hang in there. I hated my dc's teacher last year and this year dc has the best teacher ever. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:44 PM Flag
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It's end of May - get over it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:44 PM Flag
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u sound fun [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:46 PM Flag
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I know how you feel. I am sorry. A bad teacher can have negative effect for years to come. The most important thing is you stick up for your son. He will never forget that. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 03:00 PM Flag
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Get used to it. DC is in HS now, and there have been several that I disliked, but DC didn't seem to emerge with any lasting damage. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 03:02 PM Flag
[ - ] What are things in your life for which you thank your mom? 23 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:30 PM Flag
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little things? one hole per ear and no tattoos. bigger things? confidence. the belief that i could do anything if i set my mind to it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:31 PM Flag
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one hole per ear=amaze(balls) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:41 PM Flag
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Knowing how/when to write thank you notes. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:37 PM Flag
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+1 - her expression "you don't wear it, spend it, or play with it until that note goes out!" [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:41 PM Flag
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words to live by! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:42 PM Flag
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Absolutely! Another gem - "all in one you find in none." My mom's a wise old owl. ;) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:43 PM Flag
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For giving me a childhood just messed up enough to give me good stories and a sense of humor, but not so much so that Im permanently scarred. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:37 PM Flag
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I love this [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:51 PM Flag
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Nothing much beyond my childhood being a How Not to Parent primer. That's useful. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:37 PM Flag
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+1 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:49 PM Flag
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My sense of humor, my ability to speak my mind, my toughness, my take no bullshit attitude, my morals. She was an amazing woman who took NO shit. None. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:32 PM Flag
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My mom was a SAHM who drilled it into my head that I needed to be able to support myself. She made sure my sister and I learned to be strong independent women. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:40 PM Flag
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Interesting, why do you think she did that? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:51 PM Flag
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She had a good head on her shoulders ... and bequeathed her children a handsome lot. Thanks mom! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:45 PM Flag
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she mostly taught me to not be a whore and how to have good taste...that's about it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:46 PM Flag
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A strong work ethic, confidence and good genes. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:52 PM Flag
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My looks; demonstrating I should never marry a controlling man who will sacrifice his family's emotional well-being for his career; not caring about how she dresses. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:55 PM Flag
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I mean by watching our family suffer because of her decision to stand by my dad - I learned I never wanted this in my own life. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:55 PM Flag
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So your mom was beautiful but not well dressed? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 03:03 PM Flag
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Loving me for me rather than who she would've wanted me to be (we are opposites in many ways), modeling kindness to others/charitability, inculcating a love of travel, always knowing someone was proud of me and had my back, tons of family traditions that I hope to continue with my kids, that family means showing up, and BABYSITTING! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:57 PM Flag
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take no prisoners attitude [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:52 PM Flag
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Not a whole lot. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:54 PM Flag
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That she stuck up for me even when I was wrong. Privately she would tell me where I went wrong. It was nice knowing that no matter what she was there for me. She rocked and I miss her every day [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 03:01 PM Flag
[ - ] I have 3 children and work ft. I feel like I don't have enough time for each child. I really didn't understand how much more difficult it is to manage 3 vs 2 while working. I also don't feel like I could handle all 3 24x7 without a helper and if I stopped working we couldn't possibly afford help. PT is not an option for me. Anyone BTDT? Any suggestions? 16 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:29 PM Flag
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easy, have the older one watch over the younger ones. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:26 PM Flag
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He already does. This allows me to handle what I need to handle. I just don't feel like I am giving enough attention to each child especially the older child. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:33 PM Flag
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Do younger ones nap? Can you make their naptimes special activity time for older DC on weekends? Also, how about letting older DC make more decisions w you -- eg, pick what to have for dinner (w/in reason) so that there is a connection there even if you aren't always the one feeding dinner. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:37 PM Flag
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I always have dinner with them. Older dc's school work is slipping so its more that kind of attention. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:40 PM Flag
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Keep working until they are all school aged (ie, more manageable) and reevaluate? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:32 PM Flag
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I was thinking this. However when my db is in school my older dc will already be 15 yo and I am not able to give him or the middle child enough attention now. Is this just my own problem? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:34 PM Flag
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Is PT really not an option? Even if you could make $20/hr, you could get child care for that, and still keep a foot in the workforce, plus not have the burnout of taking care of 3 kids 24/7 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:30 PM Flag
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My income is 150 + benefits. I could make 60/hr+ but not for pt. I could get shot term contracts but I would work crazy hours and have breaks between contracts but I have BTDT and during breaks I ended up "working" for free searching for new contracts. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:39 PM Flag
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Posters on this board prioritize career a lot more than I do, but I would consider chucking it and finding an easier, much less lucrative career. I was always someone who didn't think I'd get married and have kids and I relish the intellectual stimulation of interesting work. But I am now mostly SAHM with a sickly toddler, doing occasional contract legal work, and while it is tough giving up something that I enjoyed (and frankly gave me some meaning), I feel strongly that I'm making the right decision. I had to come to terms with it before marrying DH, which has helped (he has to move every couple years for his job), but once he's done with his training, hopefully I can hang a shingle wherever we settle or find another meaningful job opportunity. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:57 PM Flag
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I think it's better to think about the global set of loving relationships that your DCs have - with each other, with you and your DH, with teachers, etc. - and how together, those things give your DCs a consistent sense of love and security, rather than focusing just on the one-to-one relationship between you and each DC. Also, can you and DH build little routines of one-on-one time with each DC? Maybe you and your oldest pick one weeknight a week where you go for a walk to get ice cream together or something? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:32 PM Flag
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Are you from a large family? Both dh and I aren't from large families so its a totally different dynamic than what we are used to. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:53 PM Flag
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I'm one of 3 DCs, and even though my mom was a SAHM, it wasn't like every day she had one-on-one time for each of us. I have some special memories of things that my mom and I did together, but day to day, my mom treated the three of us like a unit, and it was fine. I have really close relationships with both of my siblings now that I value so much and I think it's great that you're giving your kids that same opportunity. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 03:02 PM Flag
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Can you sell one? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:38 PM Flag
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Are you shopping around for one? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:53 PM Flag
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How much help do you have at home? I worked FT with three (cut down to four days/week earlier this year), and didn't find it to be too overwhelming. We have a great nanny who does cleaning, prepares dinner every night, does laundry, etc. I also insist on flexibility at my job (not vocally, but just start being flexible with the schedule), so I'll often leave in the middle of the day to pick up kids, then will go back to work. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:49 PM Flag
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My only suggestion is not to beat yourself up. I think if you're present for them when you can be and try to be loving and engaged with their lives, that is very meaningful. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:59 PM Flag
[ - ] What's the best exterminator in NYC for cockroaches? We seem to have an infestation, but I don't want to expose DD and DS to fumes. That said, living with cockroaches is disgusting. 3 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:27 PM Flag
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Big ones or little ones and how old are your kids? If they're not infants or toddlers, Borax is great. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:35 PM Flag
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Have them come weekly and put combat traps everywhere. Also have them spray the hinges of the cabinet be us they hide in there. My mothers neighbor is infested and is spreading everywhere to the other neighbors yuck [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:31 PM Flag
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21st Century Pest Elimination.... once voted best in NY by NY mag., Barry is the owner and got rid of the monster sized roaches from our building. The guys knows bugs like nobody else. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:42 PM Flag
[ - ] Skirts:I am tall, slender and fit and 45 My body has been the same for most of my life and I have maintained the same style over the years, more or less. My skirts fit well and look good, i think at knee length.I caught a glimpse of myself and wondered is this too short for a 45 year old? Whats the style for us old gals? 9 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:25 PM Flag
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Knee is fine. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:27 PM Flag
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i just had this revelation. i'm covering the girls more and lengthening the skirts slightly. i decided nobody wanted to see 42 yo thigh or get an accidental glimpse of a 42yo cleavage. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:28 PM Flag
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OP:i can't really understand how i got to be 45. it does not make sense. :) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:29 PM Flag
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ha. that's cute. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:38 PM Flag
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i've looked into it. i can't seem to find anyone to complain to. have you found the complaints department? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:47 PM Flag
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np - ditto. How did THAT happen? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:54 PM Flag
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Cleavages are alluring and fashionable for all ages. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:53 PM Flag
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a dh: You are wrong. It is your thigh and cleavage so do with it what you like but know that you are wrong. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:50 PM Flag
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As long as they aren't above my fingertips I will rock those skirts! Of course, work is a different story, but in any case knee length is the longest you should go unless you're wearing a maxi, ball gown or have joined some polygamous religious sect. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 05.22.13, 02:36 PM Flag
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