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[ - ] Can anyone recommend an app/spreadsheet/etc for tracking small business expenses and income? I will probably buy a formal program in the new year, but just want something very basic for right now. 3 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 01:48 PM Flag
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Quick books? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 01:37 PM Flag
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I thought quickbooks would be expensive and requires training? Happy to buy it in the new year, but want very simple for now. Income will be fairly low until next summer. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 01:54 PM Flag
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There's a basic excel from Microsoft that's free. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 01:37 PM Flag
[ - ] Kids are so god damn fuckable 0 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 01:43 PM Flag
[ - ] I just turned 50 and have to get a a colonoscopy. I am embarrassed at the thought of doctors looking at my anus. Argh. 14 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 01:31 PM Flag
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Oh, really? Is that the law? I always find it interesting what people say they "have to" do. I never had one and am older than you. ANd now here comes the scare mongerers. But before they begin (if they do) you don't have to have a colonoscopy. Or take HRT Or have a mammogram. They all carry risks. But the main thing they do is: make money for hospitals and doctors. Your choice. I keep my anus to myself. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 01:36 PM Flag
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Thank you. I am inclined to decline the so called mandate and continue without one. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 01:38 PM Flag
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You're welcome. There are risks one takes. But your body is your own. And our medical profession is obsessed with diagnosing things with their expensive (often harmful) machines. It makes me furious to always read in the papers: whoops. We shouldn't have done these tests, given this drug, advised this or that. That's my rant. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 01:33 PM Flag
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itttttta [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 01:33 PM Flag
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I'm not having a mammogram. The risks in my family are for stomach cancer and ALS. Mammies and colonoscopies aren't going to help me. Np [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 01:46 PM Flag
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Anyone else here who skips colonoscopies or mammograms? Are they really just a racket? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 01:34 PM Flag
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My friend was burned during a colonoscopy. Something about the cleaning fluid for the device. She now has a higher risk of Colon cancer than before the test. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 01:36 PM Flag
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That's awful. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 01:53 PM Flag
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I'm 42 so I don't know about colonoscopies but I haven't had a mammogram yet. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 01:56 PM Flag
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Such a weird position to have. Have you been through a cancer scare? It's fucking terrifying. The idea that I'd go into a doctor who says "you'll be dead in 9 months and there's not much we can do, because your cancer is so far along. But had we known about this two years ago...." is too much for me to bear. I can't fathom why you wouldn't want to give yourself every possible advantage to catch a disease as early as possible. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 01:39 PM Flag
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The radiation from mammograms will eventually give you cancer. I have two grandmothers and a mom who lives to their 90s, I'm not getting one. The people I know who died from breast cancer were late 30s and nothing could be done at Sloan. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 01:55 PM Flag
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I agree with you. To each her own, but I don't get this willingness to take serious health risks only to maintain comfort or modesty. Always amazed by people who think they're invincible. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 01:43 PM Flag
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The tests carry risks too. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 01:57 PM Flag
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Np. I don't believe in treating cancer because I don't believe in the cruelty that (other) animals endure to develop the drugs. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 01:57 PM Flag
[ - ] So annoyed. DH told me he thinks that the dress I picked out for his black tie work event is too low cut / revealing. I'm wearing it anyway. 4 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 01:28 PM Flag
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Disagree. His work event, his call. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 01:30 PM Flag
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BTDT: he is worried about how he will be perceived by colleagues as a result of your choice. I would honor his anxiety and wear something more conservative. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 01:30 PM Flag
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Your dh knows what his work culture is. You should listen to him. Also, he will remember that you didn't care about him or his career enough to honor this simple request to wear something else. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 01:44 PM Flag
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AGree to wear something else. Make him take you somewhere else another night so you can get your slut on. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 01:48 PM Flag
[ - ] God, my sister just called me. She is planning her wedding. Not that she wanted to, but she agreed to invite our SM's siblings (but not their kids -- her step-cousins). Not only is SM bitching, but now DAD says he doesn't want to sit with SM family. I feel so bad for her and my mom. I hope my sister does not have a destination wedding. 4 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 01:01 PM Flag
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I am confused by family relationships there. Need more background. How long has SM been in family. Why is she bitching if her sibs get to come? Why does dad not want to be with them? Weird. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 01:44 PM Flag
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She has been married to dad for 12 years, my sister and I lived with mom, not a close bond with SM. SM apparently thinks all cousins should be invited and her nephews and nieces are cousins. My sister and I know our real cousins, not so much SMs cousins. I think sister may have met them once or twice. I can only guess that Dad thinks SM is going nuts over wedding. He has now suggested a head table with bridesmaids, groomsmen and biological parents. I don't know if this is a negotiating ploy with SM or what, but my poor sister is going nuts. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 01:37 PM Flag
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^^^sister has tried to figure out seating chart AGAIN. SM's nephews/nieces are under 18, and my sister is adamant that any kids invited sit with their parents and not at a separate kids table, With number involved, she said she could put two of SM siblings with their kids and a third with dad/SM. Dad does not want any kids at his table. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 01:43 PM Flag
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Can't your sister put one or more of SMs siblings at a table other than with your Dad/SM? Sounds to me that she is not really trying to make this work. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 01:45 PM Flag
[ - ] DD'smouth guard for field hockey is pushing one of her front teeth in front of another. Neither of us are sure of what to do. We've contacted an orthodontist but any suggestions on mouth guards brands she should be using? TIA 3 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:58 PM Flag
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The ortho may be able to customize one for her [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:59 PM Flag
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We are waiting for him to get back to us. Right now we need something that won't cause any more damage in the meantime. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 01:04 PM Flag
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aren't there ones sold retail that mold to the mouth? you boil them or something then put them into the mouth while they set? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 01:44 PM Flag
[ - ] S/O of egg donor post. I have a friend who has had several failed IVF cycles. No kids yet. Now, they are trying a surrogate + donor eggs. At that point, honestly, why not adopt? We know many families who adopted newborns as well as older kids and are very happy. 26 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:43 PM Flag
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Adopting an older kid is such a gracious act [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:44 PM Flag
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Most adoptable kids have issues. Also, adoption is very complicated. Some wonderful friends of ours just got badly burned on a failed adoption. There's no such thing as "just" adopting. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:47 PM Flag
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Yes, but it has just as many hurdles and emotional entanglements as donor eggs. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:49 PM Flag
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I don't think so. A child will always wonder why his mother gave him up. I don't think anyone will wonder why she "gave up" an egg. And I don't believe egg donation is fraught with "emotional entanglements" for the woman donating. I really just don't see the issues people have with this. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:52 PM Flag
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Because your egg=your bio child [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 01:06 PM Flag
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Have you ever had genetic testing? I did, and my genes are full of garbage that absolutely NO ONE in my family has--everyone's in great health. The fact that you somehow "know" your biology or even have a connection to it is a fallacy. Most of your own genetic material comes from virtual strangers up and down your genetic line. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:57 PM Flag
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I am OP from the original post. So would you donate to a friend? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:56 PM Flag
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Yes, I would actually. I considered donating to a friend who had cancer when she was younger. I am too old, unfortunately. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:58 PM Flag
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I am leaning toward a yes but 1 mini cycle only. Don't want too many drugs. I never had any MC or fertility issues so I think 1 cycle is likely to work anyway [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 01:05 PM Flag
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I did regular IVF and the drugs were really not bad at all...only about 7 days of drugs (pretty high doses) no side effects. But I have heard that some women have a more difficult time. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 01:14 PM Flag
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You are clueless [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:55 PM Flag
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I think some people imagine they will get to experience the "miracle of birth" vicariously through the surrogate. Plus they feel they start of with the baby from day one, always theirs. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:50 PM Flag
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PP--Yes, bot this is important in reducing risk. Otherwise, you'd never know if the birth mother drank, etc. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:55 PM Flag
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they may feel a greater sense of control over the process and the "outcome" with donor eggs and surrogate [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:54 PM Flag
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I don't think it's a false sense [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:57 PM Flag
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I suspect that, but I don't know first hand, only from talking to friends who have made the decision. Despite this being an anonymous board, I could not say "they do" :) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 01:00 PM Flag
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If you believe, as many do, that intelligence is at least partially genetic, you may not want to adopt. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:59 PM Flag
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Intelligence and many other issues related to mental health [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 01:00 PM Flag
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OP: of the original post. I think this is why she asked me. I [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 01:06 PM Flag
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I can see why she wants it, I would be concerned that it is not best for a child I would regard as partially mine. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 01:28 PM Flag
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Oh please - you again. For a starter, there are other qualities than just intelligence that count. Second, if the poster is not very smart, she may well get a smarter kid from adoption. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 01:36 PM Flag
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I would only do egg donor for my sister. But that is just me. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 01:06 PM Flag
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I did not even want to do that. BIL is a moron, and I could not leave a child that I was the bio mom to, to be raised by him. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 01:38 PM Flag
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That is you. My sister and BIL are both smart and nice. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 01:45 PM Flag
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You would be surprised at the quality of donors. You can get high IQ, attractive, Ivy League, accomplished donors in good health with three generations of clean medical history on both sides. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 01:38 PM Flag
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Only if you pay a lot. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 01:46 PM Flag
[ - ] Is there a time construction and house works can start in NYC on the weekends? Neighbor's stonemason has been at work since 7.30 this morning...F**KING loud and a nuisance. 4 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:40 PM Flag
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If you live in a co-op, the co-op usually has rules about it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:30 PM Flag
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Not a building. Brooklyn residential street with two story homes. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:52 PM Flag
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I think 7:30 is too early for wknd rules, but not sure [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:33 PM Flag
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Very rude of your neighbor to allow that. Or at the least, to not apologize in advance to yhe neighbors. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 01:41 PM Flag
[ - ] You people ars distespectful. Eggs and sperm are not just "genetic material". 27 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:39 PM Flag
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You sound like a hypocrite [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:28 PM Flag
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um, yeah, that's actually exactly what they are. You do know your egg goes down the toilet every month when you menstruate, right? You don't exactly think of it as sacred then... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:37 PM Flag
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Oh be quiet. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:51 PM Flag
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?? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:52 PM Flag
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Reason is uncomfortable for you, eh? It's projection. When you want a baby, then any potential "baby" is a baby TO YOU. When you don't, it's not. No need to project your own feelings on others. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:53 PM Flag
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Just so sick of the fatalistic people on this board that believe everything has no meaning and nothing is sacred. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:44 PM Flag
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I didn't say it has no meaning, I said it has meaning TO YOU. That doesn't mean it has the same meaning to everyone. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:46 PM Flag
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Morality is not relative to individuals or loosey goosey. It is absolute. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:48 PM Flag
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NP: oh, my goodness. This is why we have religious wars, people. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:51 PM Flag
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Strawman, much? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:53 PM Flag
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Nope. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:58 PM Flag
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Oh yeah, murder depends on the circumstances that is why Casey Anthony and George Z. are out in the wild. Its all relative. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:54 PM Flag
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Says the creepy totalitarian religion of your choice. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:53 PM Flag
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Whoa. What are you doing on this board? Join one for fundamentalists. Not much is sacred to me. It's not a word I would choose. I'm willing to bet I'm more christian with a lower case "c" than most church goers. And I'd put my "morality" up against that of anyone's. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 01:29 PM Flag
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NP: I think you are the one being overly dramatic here. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:47 PM Flag
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And you sound like you accept anything. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 01:03 PM Flag
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In this case, it IS a potential baby. That's the whole point. She's not handing over some wet tee pee to be flushed down the toilet. A child very well could be born that is genetically the donor's child. If I was that kid and knew my bio mother handed an egg to a friend as a "gift" I'd hate both women. How screwed up. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:58 PM Flag
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+1 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:47 PM Flag
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Well then EVERY egg is a potential baby. Those eggs you flush are potential babies--however do you live with yourself?? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:48 PM Flag
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Dumb reasoning. A woman cannot help her menstral cycle. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:49 PM Flag
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She can help how many pregnancies she chooses to have. By your logic if you use birth control, you're disrespectfully disposing of potential human lives. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:53 PM Flag
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Well I am against birth control so this would not apply to me. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:56 PM Flag
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oh, geez. fundie wacko. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:59 PM Flag
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NP It's called sarcasm. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:55 PM Flag
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You make no sense. I would think you would have been grateful that your bio mom saw her egg as more than flushable matter and that her friend was willing to carry you to term. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:54 PM Flag
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Yeah, I don't get why these pro-life weirdos wouldn't think it's better for more eggs to become actual babies... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 01:46 PM Flag
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They are to me. To whom is that "disrespectful"? Are you anthropomorphizing the genetic material and claiming that I am disrespecting it? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 01:39 PM Flag
[ - ] When I was about 9 years old, I came home unexpectedly on an early release school day and walked into my house (front door was right off the front living room) to find my Dad having sex with my best friend's mother from behind. While this woman practically pulled the upholstery off our couch trying to cover herself, I tried to run, but my dad caught me, slapped me full across the face and told me that if I told my mom that he would get a divorce from her and take us kids away from mom forever. He couldn't, of course, but I was young and stupid and scared enough to believe him so I didn't tell my mom until many years later that Dad continued to sleep with my friend's mom every time we went over to her house for "a playdate." (That mom was single. Who knows why they were having sex in my house and I don't know where my mom was, I don't remember.) Later of course my parents inevitably divorced. On a whim I just looked that woman up. She's a fat older woman who was recently voted "Woman of the Year" in my hometown area in New York State and she holds a public office. This makes me unreasonably furious - I felt like punching her lying face right through the front page of the newspaper that is online. 16 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:39 PM Flag
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I am so sorry this happened to you. Your dad is an asshole. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:28 PM Flag
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How selfish of your father. What a total dick. Are you close to your mom? I hope you can take solafe in that rekationship. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:46 PM Flag
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Sorry for typos. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:35 PM Flag
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I am sorry. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:46 PM Flag
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Gross. Your father sounds like a huge jerk. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:36 PM Flag
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So she's a homewrecker, but why is she a liar or prevented from holding public office? We didn't want a philandering President not to lose his job for sending his stick for service in the Oval Office... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:51 PM Flag
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Sending his stick for service? Is that a common euphemism for BJ? Never heard that phrase before. I don't get the sending part; he was there. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 01:42 PM Flag
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Sucks. I would show up at a public event just to uber e her. Be all smiley face calm cool as a cucumber. Ask about her daughter and say I would love to get together, catch up, share stories about old times - smile smile [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:39 PM Flag
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Unnerve her [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:39 PM Flag
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I hate passive aggressive women. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 01:14 PM Flag
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wow so sorry. do not blame you for such anger. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:50 PM Flag
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Do you still have a relationship with your father? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 01:28 PM Flag
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Sally Draper is that you? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 01:31 PM Flag
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Why are you so angry at her? Sounds like you are displacing your feelings of rage at your dad. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 01:34 PM Flag
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Out her. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 01:35 PM Flag
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I bet you told your mom bitch [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 01:45 PM Flag
[ - ] Anybody else sick with the virus going around? 2 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:31 PM Flag
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Yes! Been over a week for dd [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:32 PM Flag
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My dd is sick. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:38 PM Flag
[ - ] http://totalhealthcleanseadvice.com/ 0 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 11:55 AM Flag
[ - ] Friend asked me to be an egg donor. She is single and has been trying to become a mom for over a year via IUI then IVF. I think she will be great mom but I am scared that I will someday have to help financially or otherwise and I have all the kids I can handle. However I want to help her. WWYD? 53 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 11:44 AM Flag
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Absolutely not. This has train wreck written all over it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:03 PM Flag
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+1. The process is a big burden. And it's expensive. If she has been paying for all of this, then surely she can pay some terrific young woman who needs the $ in return for the real trouble and who won't have these issues afterwards. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 11:53 AM Flag
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She cannot afford to pay 50+K + medical costs. If I agreed I could use my insurance for 1 cycle of retrieval. I would only agree to do 1 cycle (don't want all the meds). [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:05 PM Flag
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And if the one cycle is successful your destiny will be changed. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:20 PM Flag
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Do you think it has to be this way? Man often donate sperm to make pennies and never think about consequences. It's just genetic material and not my child I guess [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:10 PM Flag
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But they donate to a lab that then then it is given anonymously to a stranger. That is a world of difference [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:12 PM Flag
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So the difference is specific knowledge of child existing vs hypothetical knowledge? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:14 PM Flag
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I would never do any of it, but of course that's thr difference. You "know" she will be great. But what if she's not? What if you see her as intentionally for unintentionally neglectful, etc? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:17 PM Flag
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I wonder if it will be better to agree to stop being friends. Let her raise this child as her own and for me to be totally in the dark [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:20 PM Flag
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And thats a terrible thing. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:37 PM Flag
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+2. Can you help her pay for an egg donor if that's the issue? No way would I ever do this. It will be your child and you will always know it. Aside from what she might ask of you, what if she isn't a great mom or eventually marries someone that isn't a good step dad. the guilt could be crushing. Sorry to be melodramatic but just thinking about how I might feel. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:02 PM Flag
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I can't afford this much. If it was for us to have a child we could but we need these funds for our own dcs [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:07 PM Flag
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You don't have to pay for the whole thing. Can you give her something as a gesture? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:08 PM Flag
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So the issue is my knowledge of the child existing? How am I different from random donor? What if we agree that if I do this we don't see each other or talk ever again so that baby is 100% hers [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:13 PM Flag
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See above reply. It's your choice but I would never do it and I doubt you will be able to walk away entirely. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:14 PM Flag
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I am sure she will be good mom but I do worry I would have to raise this child for some reason [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:09 PM Flag
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NP Then say no. I don't see anything in your posts that suggest why you are even torn about this except you have a difficult time saying no. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:16 PM Flag
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I am leaning to yes actually but 1 cycle only and low stimulation [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:22 PM Flag
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That seems completely contrary to your saying you know she will be a great mom [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:19 PM Flag
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Anything can happen. She can become ill... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:21 PM Flag
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Absolutely do not do this. The financial issue is one thing, but how are you truly going to feel knowing her son or daughter is biologically yours? Is she resisting using an egg donor? If yes, why? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:10 PM Flag
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She can't afford it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:06 PM Flag
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np: it's not such a simple process. you will have to undergo hormone therapy, changes in order to get your eggs ready to harvest. there is a reason it's so expensive. i personally would not do this not even getting into the emotional aspect of it all. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:26 PM Flag
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I would ONLY agree to 1 mini cycle. Produce maybe 2 to 4 eggs only and only do it once. Will do 1/4 chlomid tops for 1 cycle. I will not do more than that [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:17 PM Flag
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If she is willing to raise a non-biological child as her own, why not adopt? What is the advantage of involving you? And even if you donate an egg, no guarantee she can carry it to term. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:13 PM Flag
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np: she probably wants to experience the whole pregnancy birth thing [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:27 PM Flag
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^^^but i agree, she should adopt [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:27 PM Flag
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Adoption is very difficult today. People talk about it as if its easy. Also lets face it, not every single mom is able to raise children who have issues which adoptive child is likely to have. I guess this way is as close as she can have to raising her own child. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:19 PM Flag
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We all can't get everything we want. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:23 PM Flag
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UBers often suggest asking a friend for sperm donation. This isn't different although much more invasive. I don't like the drugs and the retrieval aspect. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:26 PM Flag
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Right? People really seem to think adopting is nothing more than going down to the baby store & picking out a child. That is so far, far, far from the truth it is truly headshaking. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:55 PM Flag
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TY. I know so many married coupled wanting to adopt. Saying single mom. Should just adopt is saying she should take an older troubled child. Not everyone can handle this alone while working too [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:47 PM Flag
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Great point. Adopt. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:52 PM Flag
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I would say "I'd love to help you, but I can't. You would be a great mom. Have you considered adoption?" And I would have said that as soon as she asked me. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:18 PM Flag
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OP: do you think donor egg + close relatives sperm is different to your own egg + donor sperm? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:24 PM Flag
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Yes, very much so. In the first case neither egg nor sperm comes comes from the eventual parent. The mother is a surrogate. Not so in the example. The baby is genetically hers as much as if the sperm had come from a partner. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:36 PM Flag
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How is this different for a mom who had a donor egg and dh's sperm and perhaps is divorced or widowed etc [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:53 PM Flag
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^^ although close relatives sperm actually makes dc more genetically linked to the mother than dh's sperm [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:54 PM Flag
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You really see no difference? Ok. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 01:13 PM Flag
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Do you have other children already? If no, I would graciously decline. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:41 PM Flag
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Yes and I can not afford one more and will not have anymore [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:29 PM Flag
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So, what if she died? Would you allow that child to go to foster care? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:46 PM Flag
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No so that's my biggest concern frankly [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:59 PM Flag
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If you already have kids, I would do it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 01:11 PM Flag
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An egg is YOUR egg. That would be YOUR child. Do you want to see your eyes staring back at you? What if you don't like the way your friend raises this child? Donating eggs to strangers is one thing (I'd never do it but understand those that do). Donating an egg to someone you know? No way. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:50 PM Flag
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I can tell her that we will not see each other afterwords. She will understand and may prefer it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:51 PM Flag
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So you would give up her friendship? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 01:24 PM Flag
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Most people don't know what the hell is in their genes. Either way, you're passing on genetic material passed down from people in your background that you've never even met. They're basically strangers. genetic connection is a myth, and we believe there is some similarity between us and others who look like us. I really don't think you'd be on the hook financially or emotionally as the egg donor. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:45 PM Flag
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OP: I understand why she would ask. We have similar background so her baby would be similar. She would know health history as much as my own child and she has much reason to expect a similar child to her own knowing donor. Does this make sense? I get why she prefers to ask me than random donor [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 01:03 PM Flag
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Makes sense to me. It's like asking a good male friend to be a sperm donor--you know him, know he would have access to health history, etc. I'm pretty liberal about this stuff and don't really see the complicated issues of ethics and morality here--to me it's just science. But it does depend on your emotions too--if you would be bothered by another bio child of yours being out there, biologically related to your own kids, etc. then I can see how it would be complicated. I posted in thread above--I considered donating to a friend who had cancer, but was too old. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 01:08 PM Flag
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^The one thing I would worry about is if I passed down some horrible genetic issue. I would get genetic testing, just in case. Not saying everyone should, but this would be important to me... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 01:13 PM Flag
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This is BS. What she has gone through -- unless this is FAKE -- is already hugely expensive!! What's an extra -- what -- $7k? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 01:48 PM Flag
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It's way more than this. 5k-10k is just the compensation to the donor. Then there are medical expenses for the donor, admin fees, any additional genetic testing, embryo freezing fees, etc. Can easily go over 20k [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 01:52 PM Flag
[ - ] Going thru high school applications. DC is testing VERY well on the practice SHSATs (over Stuy cutoff), but doesn't want Stuy - would be happy with at least 4 of the specialized high schools. I know we are supposed to rank as many non-specializeds as possible, but what if we are nearly certain that a specialized will be the ultimate choice? We don't have time for all these tours what with homework and after schools. 3 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 11:39 AM Flag
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Put your first choice first. Your second choice second . Your third choice third etc. if you dont want sruy do t put it. but id put most of the others .Time to your is irrelevant - you don't have to accept the offer (but if your regular choices suck you just might be thrilled to do so. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:00 PM Flag
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Sorry for typos [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 12:01 PM Flag
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OP: Do you understand the process? You rank specialized and non-specialized schools separately. We know what our specialized preferences are and we are not sure whether to invest significant time in visiting and ranking non-specializeds. DC's practice tests are far above adequate to get into all but stuyvesant. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 09.20.14, 01:52 PM Flag
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