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[ - ] Yes, seems like he really has it down LOL- He also addressed his ego, “One of my biggest Achilles heels has been my ego. And if I, Kanye West, the very person, can remove my ego, I think there’s hope for everyone.” 5 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:51 PM Flag
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Thank you. Priceless! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:54 PM Flag
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I can barely stand to look at him and that self-consumed face. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:56 PM Flag
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+1 and the perpetual frown [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:57 PM Flag
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Yes, that too. Ugh. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:59 PM Flag
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Where can I read more? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:57 PM Flag
[ - ] DS has a late December birthday, in Kindergarten at NYC public school so he's 5y2m right now. I'm having a lot of regret about him being so young and dreading 1st grade. He has an older sister with a February birthday who always had the benefit of being among the oldest (and I still found K and 1st to be overly academic, even for her... an older girl). What are my options? Does NYC public ever let a kid repeat K? His birthday is 6 days before Dec 31 cut-off. 3 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
NY Schools 03.03.15, 02:49 PM Flag
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Parent teacher conferences are in a week. I would make sure this is what you want to do before asking. But if you're sure, I would ask the teachers what they think about holding him back for the year and asking them to support you in pushing for it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:52 PM Flag
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I don't know about NYC since I moved before dcs started school, but I had ds repeat K because he was one of the younger/smaller kids and seemed to be struggling. It was a good decision; he's been doing well ever since (now in 5th grade) and isn't the oldest kid in his class. 9yo dd did not repeat, and she is fine; I think boys have a tougher time. Get a recommendation from his teacher. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:54 PM Flag
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Talk to the teacher. My dd is the youngest kid in her class (and the whole grade, from what I hear). It isn't always easy but I think kids have challenges no matter what, and it might not be realistic to assume all their problems are due to age. My son is one of the oldest boys in his class (K) and I think has a trickier time than his buddy who is the youngest boy. I found that the kids who did full day daycare/preschool have an easier time in K than the kids (like my son) who just did half day or part of the week preschool [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 03:00 PM Flag
[ - ] All Souls or MAPCDS? Like both, torn about the decision. Both are walking distance. Help! 2 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
Preschool/Kids 03.03.15, 02:48 PM Flag
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You really can't go wrong. Flip a coin. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:51 PM Flag
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thx [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:53 PM Flag
[ - ] I'm on the merricats waitlist. I need to figure out if I accept at another school or wait it out. 4 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:44 PM Flag
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Why not wait it out? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:47 PM Flag
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wait it out assuming merricats > your accept. this is what the wait list is for. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:53 PM Flag
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I know a family that just released this morning, call merricats. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:55 PM Flag
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What is your accept? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:57 PM Flag
[ - ] I just put a rip in my moncler coat :-( Anyone know where I might be able to have this fixed? My tailor is telling me he doesn't have the fabric so can't sew it up. 6 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:41 PM Flag
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Serves you right for spending so much on a coat. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:43 PM Flag
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OP: I actually didn't I bought it secondhand and it kept me warm all winter - Thanks for judging [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:45 PM Flag
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Even dumber to cheap out and be branded. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:47 PM Flag
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chinatown [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:45 PM Flag
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what's a moncler coat [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:48 PM Flag
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step up from east face [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:52 PM Flag
[ - ] My conclusion after listening to DF's assessment of their DCs' high school experience: pressure cooker HS prepares DC for college (college workload is a breeze compared to HS and can enjoy college experience) vs regular HS and DC needs to work hard in college to keep up (kids have more fun in HS). Which did your DC do and his/her experience? 3 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:39 PM Flag
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I've seen a lot of kids from high-pressure HS who went to college and went wild (alcohol, drugs, sex, partying). No fun in HS is not ideal IMO. College is the time to get serious and feel some pressure. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:46 PM Flag
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You can have a range of students at each type of high school. Good students continue to do well; students who aren't as motivated tend to keep drifting in that direction. It's about the student and what they do with the school they attend. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:50 PM Flag
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Let kids be kids. HS is ages 14-18. Not adults yet. It's a time to pursue extra curricular activities too, family time, vacations, sports etc. Sure, work hard and challenge yourself but there's no need to be doing college level work in HS (including all the stress). Especially since most kids at pressure cooker HS need tutoring to keep up! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:51 PM Flag
[ - ] What's the ratio of your investment in mutual fund/stocks vs money in your saving account? 17 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:36 PM Flag
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10 to 1? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:39 PM Flag
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$1.3M in stock index funds. $5k in savings account. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:40 PM Flag
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That's pretty stupid. If the market melts down again --and it will-- you'll be forced to take a monster hit if you need cash. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:48 PM Flag
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Yes, oh, wise one. And how much money do you have? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:50 PM Flag
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More than you. You are being foolish. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:52 PM Flag
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Pretty sure you don't. Spill. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:54 PM Flag
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OR. That's not me. I couldn't care less how much you have. I'm not foolish. We're very well capitalized with a paid-off house, stable jobs, and low living expenses. Do whatever you want, but I'm fine with our situation. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:55 PM Flag
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I don't need this cash. If I do, I have dividends. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:50 PM Flag
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From stock funds? You don't automatically reinvest? That's stupid, too. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:56 PM Flag
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You're just trolling. I do automatically reinvest. If I needed the cash, I could change that selection. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:57 PM Flag
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19 to 1 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:44 PM Flag
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I beg of you not to take financial advice from UB! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:49 PM Flag
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Pro soy not any worse than your average investment advisor. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:55 PM Flag
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Damn autocorrect [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:57 PM Flag
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havent invested bonuses yet, but it's 1 : 1 : 2 - stocks : bonds : cash at the moment [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:56 PM Flag
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1 to 10. Am I being too conservative? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:57 PM Flag
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you have 10 times the amount in cash that you have in investments? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:59 PM Flag
[ - ] WWYD if your DF in her late 30s is having an affair with a married man (with young kids) and she is thinking about getting pregnant with him, knowing that he might not leave his wife for her, but she wants her own biological child before her clock stops ticking? 23 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:36 PM Flag
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I would let stupid people make stupid decisions. The only control you have in this situation is whether you are around to witness it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:38 PM Flag
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^^She said she would be willing to keep the baby secret from the wife and not even ask for CS as she can afford to raise the baby on her own. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:39 PM Flag
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Tell her if she really wants a baby to go about it the right way. Doesn't she want to be able to tell her child the real story of how he or she came to be? There are plenty of better options than bamboozling a married man with kids. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:42 PM Flag
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UB's favorite myth, I can afford to support a DB on my own and fathers are useless. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:44 PM Flag
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Does this guy have better genes than a young guy should could meet in a bar? Why does she want him in particular? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:42 PM Flag
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Right? It's probably because she isn't really willing to keep it a secret (nor should She plan to do thst to a child) and is hoping this guy comes around. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:49 PM Flag
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+1. She's going to try to use the pregnancy to pressure the guy to leave his wife; otherwise, she could just use a sperm bank. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:52 PM Flag
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When my single friends start messing around with married men I stop being friends with them. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:44 PM Flag
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Yes. Someone who is willing to wreck a family is willing to do a lot of other things, including against you. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:54 PM Flag
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She is running out of time, its this or sperm bank for her [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:48 PM Flag
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Oh and don't judge [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:49 PM Flag
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Sperm bank is clearly the better option. Ugh. She is gross [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:52 PM Flag
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Not cheap though. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:54 PM Flag
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If she can afford to raise a kid on her own she can afford the sperm. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:56 PM Flag
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I would advise her to go w a sleek bank. She will regret messing w a family. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:56 PM Flag
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I would advise her to go w a sleek bank. She will regret messing w a family. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:56 PM Flag
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Does he want to impregnate her or is she planning on tricking him? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:52 PM Flag
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OP: I think she is planning on not being very careful with her birth control and, honestly, I think she is half-hoping that her affair partner will leave his family for her. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:53 PM Flag
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She's getting old. He's more likely to leave her for a younger affair partner. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:57 PM Flag
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The baby will resent being the neglected child of a poor mother whose father is providing well for her step-siblings. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:53 PM Flag
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half-siblings. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:55 PM Flag
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yes, thanks. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:57 PM Flag
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I would tell her to stop being friends with internet trolls [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:56 PM Flag
[ - ] The teacher is stealing my 4 year old's lunch lady is hysterical. Do parents not realize little kids make up stories? 12 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:34 PM Flag
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The kid is probably throwing the food out [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:36 PM Flag
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Of course. She packs her adult good and she'd rather have ritz crackers and snacks [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:38 PM Flag
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Mine was trading all my healthy lunch items for crap -- candy, nutella, chocolate milk. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:38 PM Flag
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Smart. How'd he or she get kids to make those trades? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:42 PM Flag
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There was one kid in the class who came to the lunch table with a cornucopia of crap -- a lunchbox with sweets for way more than one. He was the dealer. I think that kid rather enjoyed the trading process -- I don't think he was eating all that he traded for. This was a bit older than preK -- I think it was first grade. I (and the rest of the moms in the class) found out in the spring. I think one mom called the dealer boy's mom and shut down the game. My DC (now in HS) remembers the Year of Nutella fondly. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:58 PM Flag
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I lived overseas as a young child and my very dedicated wohm made spectacular lunches for me and my kindergarten teacher did just that. Not sure this aide is doing the same but it's not unheard of in a country of 300mm people, probably. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:42 PM Flag
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Why are you all surprised? Some of the lowest lowlives I know are preschool teachers and aides. I wouldn't be surprised in the least. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:48 PM Flag
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And the vast majority of them are obsessive eaters. Seriously, most of them are obese slobs who can't control themselves around food. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:49 PM Flag
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You are nuts [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:50 PM Flag
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To be fair, it would be very surprising if not quite shock inducing . [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:51 PM Flag
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I had a friend who taught at a school that was attached to a hospital (the school was for long-term patients), and she would tell me stories about how the aides stole Christmas presents that had been donated for the patients, for their own kids. So, while it's not nice to think about, these things do happen. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:50 PM Flag
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+1 Who are you naive fools who think people don't steal? Stealing from kids is the easiest thing to do and some people have no qualms about doing so. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:54 PM Flag
[ - ] WOHM, how often do you go out after work with friends or for networking? I have plans twice this week and feel guilty. I work late often as well. 3 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:27 PM Flag
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rarely, but that's bc i'm the primary parent at home so i put kids down, feed them, etc. and i have a baby that i'm nursing... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:32 PM Flag
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As little as possible. I try to do it all my socializing and networking during lunch and I work late from home after kids are in bed. But I have to travel for work so I probably miss about 6 nights a month. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:46 PM Flag
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I have one weeknight that us for either going out of staying late to take care of personal stuff (this week, taxes) or catch up on work. Maybe every six weeks i'll have a networking event or birthday drinks or something in addition. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:59 PM Flag
[ - ] On average, my 12 month old is up for an hour or 2 screaming 3-4 nights/week. She sleeps 7pm-5am, and sadly, this is the best she's ever slept. Our pediatrician is at a loss - db cries and cries before each nap and bedtime, too, and wakes up crying. Then all day long is clingy and falling asleep in her high chair. I feel like I've tried everything (I have taken db to the big pediatric sleep center in our city, followed their advice to the letter) Rather than advice as to CIO/not CIO or scheduling (since I've already got expert advice on those topics), I'm just wondering if any of you had a similar db and if there was anything maybe underlying it (or when they outgrew it). She is the sweetest most loving baby - squeals with delight at the smallest thing. But she is just struggling so much to get sleep and it's killing me. She had horrible colic for 6 months but we ruled out reflux and allergies. Thanks. 17 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:27 PM Flag
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Sounds like ear infection (which I'm sure your dr ruled out) or more likely teething! My db was like this off and on around that age. Once the teeth erupt she will be fine. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:30 PM Flag
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I hope this current issue is teething related, but she has had these issues her whole life and only has 2 teeth so far! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:33 PM Flag
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Np teething takes several months and can be painful off and on for weeks at a time before you see new teeth. My dd had a horrendous time with teething, I was in your shoes, wondering what could be so wrong, and now that all her teeth are in and I broight her to the dentist and she saw how crowded her mouth is she told me- wow, teething must've been really tough with this one! She had eruption cysts with her molars which I had never heard of and was so freaked out. It's all fine now and I feel bad that I was so frustrated with her at times :( I always try to remember that everything is a phase and will be over so quickly and to just hold her while she still wants me to! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:38 PM Flag
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Thanks - I so hope you're right [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:40 PM Flag
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Other behaviors my ped said can be signs of extreme teething pain- pulling on ones own hair, ears and face, face/head hitting/banging. Have you given her Tylenol and does it help? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:45 PM Flag
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We've given tylenol when we've suspected teething but haven't noticed much of a change. I can try using it every night, and see if I notice any different pattern, though [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:50 PM Flag
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I gave my dd a half dose and it did the trick. Made me feel better about giving it frequently during the toughest weeks. Good luck!!!' [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:53 PM Flag
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She definitely sounds like she's in a cycle of being overtired at this point. Typical babies cry before sleeping when overtired and if they wake up crying, they still need more sleep. A well-rested baby wakes up happy. Will she go to sleep when given a bottle? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:39 PM Flag
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Not anymore [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:41 PM Flag
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^ But yes, she is definitely in an overtired cycle. She is averaging about 11 hours a day which is obviously way too little. She will eventually fall asleep in the car, but I have 3 yo, too, so we can't just spend the day driving around [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:47 PM Flag
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Right, that is too little. Does she have dedicated nap times or do you have to constantly wake her up to take the 3 year old somewhere? If so, can you get a morning or afternoon sitter so she does not have to leave the house? Car naps totally kill routines. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:55 PM Flag
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7pm-5am is what our baby sleeps too but I consider that a full night. Is the crying during this time or at 5am? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:45 PM Flag
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No, it's in between, but at totally random intervals (one night may be 9-10:30, another night may be 3am-4am) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:48 PM Flag
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What do you do with her during this time? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:58 PM Flag
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Is the baby warm enough? Socks on feet and soft blanket? How warm is the house? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:46 PM Flag
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Co-sleep, she needs mom [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:50 PM Flag
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I wish she would! She just crawls off the bed [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:54 PM Flag
[ - ] What is wrong with me? I think our 19 year old neighbor is so hot. I'm in my early 30's, married with 1 kid. I actually looked at his FB page! 37 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:22 PM Flag
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You have become a dirty old lady. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:24 PM Flag
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Old lady? WTF. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:25 PM Flag
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Yes, old lady. Pretty sure that if his mother knew, she would consider you a pervert and want you to stay far away from her son. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:27 PM Flag
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How old are you? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:28 PM Flag
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You seem very uptight. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:29 PM Flag
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I can appreciate beauty in any form. However, looking at his fb page sounds "off". She needs to focus on her dh and stop fantasizing about a 19 yo neighbor. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:34 PM Flag
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But if it were a 33 year old male dating a 19 or 20 year old, that's different, right? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:37 PM Flag
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Absolutely not. As a mother, I would be upset whether it is a dirty old man or lady. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:40 PM Flag
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^^if anything, most people on this board would be screaming about how sick you were if you were a man. Majority of these responses prove the double standard when it comes to acceptance of adults having sex with teen girls vs teen boys. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:44 PM Flag
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They're adults at 18. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:55 PM Flag
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Seriously? Like if that guy came on to her she'd turn him down? And like if that were your college son you wouldn't be pissed? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:34 PM Flag
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Pleae, what 19 year old boy would come on to a woman who's 32 or 33? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:36 PM Flag
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19 year old boys come on to ANYONE they think they can get sex from. They aren't the most discerning creatures. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:39 PM Flag
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I disagree. I don't think would go for someone in their 30's [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:44 PM Flag
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Do you have teen boys? They would stick it in any hole, no matter how wrinkled. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:45 PM Flag
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No way [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:55 PM Flag
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LOL maybe you were a "wrinkled hole" at 33, but speak for yourself. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 03:00 PM Flag
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When I was 33,I was getting hit on by 19yo. I was in a Master's program at Columbia and definitely got asked out by juniors and seniors. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:47 PM Flag
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As opposed to our 19 yo DDs, who we're supposed to just take as a fact will get hit on by guys in their 30s and 40s? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:59 PM Flag
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Nothing wrong with having a crush on a younger person, and FB is open to everyone. Just don't act on it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:24 PM Flag
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Of course I won't, but this is weird. He's just the type of guy I would date in high school and college. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:27 PM Flag
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Nothing weird about it: "the day we stop looking is the day we die." [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:37 PM Flag
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^^and at least your secret crush is a guy, LOL [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:43 PM Flag
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Hahaha [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:47 PM Flag
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Makes sense. You're clinging to your old identity by even thinking there's a possibility you could date this guy... it's a fantasy, nbd [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:39 PM Flag
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You're right. That's probably what it is. I can't believe I'm already 32. I know it's still young, but I don't know. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:48 PM Flag
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Cause it's weird! A few short years ago we were the people that guy was checking out and now we are invisible behind the strollers we push... Lol [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:50 PM Flag
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He probably is hot, that's why. I can tell when 6yo kids are going to be good looking. It's kind of funny. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:25 PM Flag
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LOL [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:27 PM Flag
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Wrong? This is a sign of your health and fertility, not to mention a healthy sex drive. What man wouldn't notice a hot 19 year old girl next door? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:39 PM Flag
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+1 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:45 PM Flag
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This [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 03:00 PM Flag
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They look good but they are so confused and immature, just accept that he's only dredging up memories of your youth. There's nothing else to see there. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:41 PM Flag
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True. Thank you. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:45 PM Flag
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Like she cares about confused or immature. She's looking at that hot, young, hard body. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:48 PM Flag
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Totally normal. I have a weird crush on a young guy in my office. It means you still have a sex drive and a life force. That is a good thing. Just don't do anything about it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:44 PM Flag
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Absolutely correct. Want to know how many days until I get to see my dental hygienist crush? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:47 PM Flag
[ - ] S/O- What is the median income of TT private schools? I ask median, since obviously there are some billionaire families in every class that throw off the mean. We can afford private (HHI $450), but I don't want DC to feel like he's the poorest kid there. Serious replies only. TIA. 33 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:19 PM Flag
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IDK but DF who teaches at a private told me a few years ago she guessed it was about $600K-$700K. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:22 PM Flag
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This sounds right to me. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:44 PM Flag
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You won't. We have a hhi of 200k - one kid in pvt and it's just fine. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:23 PM Flag
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Op. Are you on FA? We wouldn't qualify, which means after tuition and other costs, he wouldn't get a ton of "extras." [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:25 PM Flag
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Nope, no FA. Kid gets all she needs for extras. We are friendly with several other families - some very wealthy, some "Manhattan MC", like us. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:27 PM Flag
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Thanks that reassuring. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:30 PM Flag
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what are your housing expenses? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:25 PM Flag
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Fairly low - husb bought his apt yrs ago when in converted so we have only maintenance . We inherited a beach house, which is pricey to support and we rent it out a bit. We do just fine. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:29 PM Flag
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so you're kind of the equivalent of the grandparents paying. It's just that you inherited rental property. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:36 PM Flag
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Which, btw, is quite expensive to maintain...and a bit shabby at the moment. We are lucky with housing. Husb was smart to jump on this yrs ago. Not fancy but an ok 2 bedrm. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:38 PM Flag
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Same. Low housing costs though. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:28 PM Flag
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there's median income, and then there's median income of families who are not having Grandpa pay the tuition. The latter is much higher. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:23 PM Flag
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Do you mean that most parents have or do not have grandparents help? Because we would not. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:27 PM Flag
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at least half do [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:28 PM Flag
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FWIW, when I was a student at private HS (not on FA, but with 2 professional parents who were stretching to send me there), I actually found myself gravitating to quite a few kids who were attending with grandparent help. There may not be as big a cultural gap as you might think. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:41 PM Flag
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About 20% of families at most schools will have incomes under 250K (with some much lower than that). [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:24 PM Flag
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^^^ and almost all the staff and teachers will have incomes lower than yours [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:24 PM Flag
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that's why they're the staff. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:25 PM Flag
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no, it's the reverse. Teachers' incomes are low because that's what we pay teachers; they don't magically get assigned as staff/teachers because they have been magically assigned a certain salary (or because they "deserve" a lower salary). Sloppy thinking, but it's a lot to expect for someone to understand math and devote her time to acting as if she cares about her affluent husband. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:30 PM Flag
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LOL, ILY [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:32 PM Flag
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+1.TY for that. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:59 PM Flag
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You child may as well learn now that some people will always have less and some always more than they do. It'll be true throughout life. Get over it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:25 PM Flag
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OP. I'm over it, and I don't think DS, who's 3, has any clue. I'm asking bc I don't want him to feel left out if all the other kids have nicer clothes, nicer apts, nicer vacations, etc. That stuff becomes obvious to kids as they get older, and I'd rather DS be the middle of the pack rather than at the bottom in terms of that stuff. Just my preference. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:29 PM Flag
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I posted before about our lowish income. Your kid will be fine if you're fine. And, btw, some of the wealthier families live very unpretentious life styles. Same issues in umc suburbs. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:35 PM Flag
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np. I agree with you, and I wouldn't do private for this reason. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:37 PM Flag
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I wouldn't worry about it, especially with a boy. Just give him the best education possible. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:50 PM Flag
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I don't disagree with the underlying sentiment but it's ridiculous in this context. Her dc will learn that lesson by sheer virtue of growing up in nyc (or any non-homogenous area). OP doesn't need to "get over" anything, as there's no reason a parent needs to self-select into an even more skewed environment if doing so would make her (or dc) I'll at ease, and pay $45k/year for the privilege of doing so. Her question and concerns are reasonable. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:42 PM Flag
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^^^ I'll at ease [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:43 PM Flag
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A. 20% of kids at TT schools get some sort of financial aid; they all make less than you. B. Then there are the people whose HHI is $450 or less (which is a lot, in case you hadn't noticed) but whose tuition payment affects their overall lifestyle; that's your demographic group. C. Then there are the people whose tuition is paid by grandma or a trust fund; they are often in pro bono type fields and may have an overall patina of wealth but may not actually have as much disposable income as you. Then there are the two groups that you're worried about: D. the 7 figure HHI (almost all Wall Street or CEO-level businessman and law firm partners with SAHM's who spend a lot of time on UB) and E. the inherited wealth group (in which the adults may or may not work, but, if they do, they generally make less than you do). One could, of course, divide people up differently. There's the A. multi-generational NY society parental group who get a lot of press but is relatively small, B. the effortful from-out-of-town-but-at-the top-of-their-game group (whose members make the 7 figures if they chose those sorts of jobs but also make much less if they chose to be doctors, non-corporate lawyers, journalists, editors, etc), who don't get a lot of press; C. the obviously diverse kids who are often on FA but who can also be in any of the above groups (and if you don't think there's a group of rich African Americans in NYC, join Jack and Jill--and where do you think those kids go to school? It ain't Newark). D. and there's another group in which the kid is just really smart/talented, and the parents (who do not see themselves as especially awesome, unlike members in most of the other groups) scrape by to send them to the hardest school they can find (which is often a specialty public but includes the academic private schools as well). I'm sure I've left out subgroups and would also emphasize that people who look like landed gentry can be poor, people who drive a battered subaru may be worth $500m, and people who get generally vilified for being rich tycoons may be the ones who go out of their way to include children of color in their family's daily activities (I'm thinking of a single example but will leave it out of the discussion). Anyway, each school varies in their percentages of these parents, and there may be an ongoing trend that tends to be self perpetuating. But as to your question, class is a big deal in the US, and you are not going to be in the class of everyone else in a private school. Or a public school. And neither is anyone else. Some of the richest and most privileged people I have ever met were embarrassed that their name was instantly recognizable by anyone who finished junior high school, and they hated the fact that people assumed a silver spoon. And I've known insufferably snobbish people who were rich, and who were poor. And then beyond the overall school trend, there's the fact that every grade varies either a little or a lot. And who your child chooses to befriend is unpredictable. Etc. So my view is that the Social strata issue is HUGE but unpredictable. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:49 PM Flag
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OP. Hmm this is a thoughtful analysis. I agree with all your points. My question was basically to figure out if DS would feel poor or out of place, and I assume your terse response to this would be "no?" [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:56 PM Flag
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Our HHI is a little over $1m. I feel like we're around the middle. No grandparent support here. (We actually provide some support to grandparents.) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:39 PM Flag
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Thanks. Do you think you would be able to differentiate your lifestyle from those making half your income? Would the kids be able to differentiate this (at the middle school level or so)? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:50 PM Flag
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^^oh, and I've had a close friend with HHI of >$1m say he felt relatively poor at Dalton, and another good friend whose HHI is--I'd guess--350K say "there's a lot of money at Dalton but nobody talks about it, and it's really a non-issue." [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:54 PM Flag
[ - ] So is having dinner with a married man cheating? 11 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:17 PM Flag
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no [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:19 PM Flag
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Depends on whether the dinner is foreplay or simply dinner with a friend, etc. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:19 PM Flag
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Do the spouses know? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:23 PM Flag
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Don't know if she did. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:42 PM Flag
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+1 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:43 PM Flag
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I would not. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:25 PM Flag
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Depends what he ate for dinner. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:30 PM Flag
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OMG! Why don't we all lock ourselves away when we get married so that we will never be tempted to ever talk to the opposite sex. I have dinner with married men all the freaking time. Some business and some just friends. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:41 PM Flag
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If one of you isn't telling your spouse about the dinner, yes. Secretive meetings are the beginning of an affair. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:42 PM Flag
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No, just being stupid. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:50 PM Flag
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And neither is buying condoms on your way to the restaurant. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 03.03.15, 02:54 PM Flag
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