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[ - ] I should drag myself to the gym, right? 2 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 02:10 AM Flag
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do it fatso [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 02:10 AM Flag
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waddle waddle [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 02:11 AM Flag
[ - ] AAHHH fuck, I wish the UB search function would work. I saw so many helpful Hunter posts last year and the year before, I wish I would have saved them. AARGH!! 6 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 02:04 AM Flag
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Start a new one! When is your DC going? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 02:05 AM Flag
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Jan 17th. The posts I'm looking for discuss the specific activities they do in R2. Why, UB, WHY must your search engine be a piece of crap when I actually need it? :) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 02:06 AM Flag
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Same for us. Morning? Good luck! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 02:08 AM Flag
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Yes. Haha, maybe I will see you at the library. GL! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 02:10 AM Flag
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At least 1st weekend so you've got a leg up. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 02:11 AM Flag
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I know. All I want to do is search for nursery school posts to get the real scoop on these places... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 02:07 AM Flag
[ - ] A really good friend recommended a therapist. I was seeing this therapist for about 3 months. I REALLY liked him and I have only been to therapy maybe 2-3 times in my life (and usually only for a few sessions). I really felt like I was getting somewhere. However, the therapist has not shown up to a session twice (he forgot he scheduled it) and this morning, I was supposed to see him at 8:00 am and he double booked. I showed up, then another woman and the therapist asked if we could reschedule. I have no desire to see the therapist again (and I am insanely pissed about this) but do I tell my friend? Or would that just put my friend in the middle. 2 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 02:03 AM Flag
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This isn't about your friend at all. She gave you the rec and she's done. But the therapist is bizarre and you should move on. But don't let that stop you from getting therapy if you need it. There are a lot of good therapists out there. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 02:07 AM Flag
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OP: the friend is the one that recommended I get therapy and recommended this therapist. I think I have a lot of problems opening up about a few portions of my life (abusive parents that I now have a fairly "normal" relationship with). I was so ready to talk today and was just amazed this happened. I agree it isn't the friend's responsibility but I sort of want to tell her why I am not seeing the therapist. Or should I just wait until it comes up, if it does? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 02:11 AM Flag
[ - ] Fireworks in NYC right now? 6 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 02:00 AM Flag
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Nope [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 02:03 AM Flag
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yes, I hear them in BK too [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 02:03 AM Flag
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Op- I'm in Bk too. They stopped but I just heard them again. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 02:04 AM Flag
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yes west village and it's fxing noisy!! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 02:04 AM Flag
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Yes. I'm on the LES [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 02:04 AM Flag
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Yes sure loud in BRooklyn, in BPC I think [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 02:06 AM Flag
[ - ] My dad takes $50K worth of medication a month. Without them or insurance (he ends up spending @$500) he'd be dead. Weird to think of it like that. 1 Reply [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 02:00 AM Flag
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we should count our blessings, not everyone has access to healthcare, i hope he's feeling well [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 02:06 AM Flag
[ - ] My 7 y/o just told me that she's bad because she doesn't listen. I tell her quite often that she doesn't listen. Mother of the year award here :/ 4 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 01:59 AM Flag
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Subtle but important distinction: please tell her that she is behaving badly, not that she is a bad kid and all is forgiven. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 02:02 AM Flag
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this. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 02:03 AM Flag
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ITA [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 02:08 AM Flag
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OP: she also said that she feels bad when I yell at her cause she doesn't listen. We pinky promised that I would try not to yell and she will try to be better listener. We hugged and kissed, but I still feel like crap. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 02:11 AM Flag
[ - ] S/O on WASP post. I grew up in a city called London, Ontario that was so WASPy Catholics stood out. WASP was an ethnicity and had nothing to do with social class. Most people in London were middle class, as were most WASPs. I've never understood the definition of it in NYC. Is it because there are so few of them and a native New Yorker who's a wasp would be old money almost by definition? 21 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 01:52 AM Flag
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The term in common American usage refers to upper class Protestants, the sort traditionally associated with the Episcopal Church, although other mainline denominations would count too. Think George H.W. and Barbara Bush. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 01:54 AM Flag
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It has a different connotation beyond just "White Anglo Saxon Protestant". Here it also historically refers to the influential upper class. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 01:55 AM Flag
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If you grew up in Ontario, then none of you were WASPs [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 01:55 AM Flag
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? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 01:56 AM Flag
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WASPs= Americans (not Canadians) per the traditional definition [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 01:58 AM Flag
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White Anglo Saxon Protestant. Don't see American in there [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 01:59 AM Flag
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you are bogged down in just the letters of the acronym. it means so much more than that. the true meaning involves the people who came to the us on the mayflower, founded the country, and were powerful, rich, and influential. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 02:01 AM Flag
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So basically the answer is "I've made up my own definition of what WASP should mean and will now expect everyone to agree with my definition of it." [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 02:02 AM Flag
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Op here. But this acronym is probably even more commonly used in Canada than in the US, from my experience. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 02:06 AM Flag
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Op. I'm not but everybody else was Anglo, Church of England, common to have English grandparents. They had many of the characteristics people talked about in the wasp post.....heavy drinking but total indifference to food, huge focus on appearances, ie nice living rooms but garbage furniture upstairs in the bedrooms. Witty banter but discomfort talking about anything 'real.' I don't get why in NY (or the US?) wasp wouldn't apply to all white Protestant Anglos... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 02:03 AM Flag
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I feel like it's just part of the general strive-y rubbernecking around here. They've over-romanticized this fantasy WASP world and want to talk about it all the time. It's like the Kate Middleton obsession. I know what you mean because half my family lives in the rural Midwest and are technically WASP's, being of mostly English Protestant descent but they have nothing in common with the people UB refer to as WASP's. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 01:55 AM Flag
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wasp is a cultural thing-if your relatives are midwestern hicks, then then have nothing to do with being wasps (technical definition means nothing) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 01:59 AM Flag
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But technically it means White Anglo Saxon Protestant - that IS the literal meaning - and OP is asking why you've added in this other layer of meaning. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 02:01 AM Flag
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The literal meaning means absolutely nothing in and of itself, is my point I guess. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 02:02 AM Flag
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Well, so as posted above, your answer is, "Because I've made up my own definition of what WASP means." [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 02:03 AM Flag
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I would say being wasp is a very north eastern thing, correct? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 02:05 AM Flag
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Yes, it is [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 02:06 AM Flag
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But you do realize that the word has a much broader meaning to many other people, and has been in use in that way for a very long time? I didn't think so. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 02:09 AM Flag
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Yes, but they are wrong. I dislike how frequently this word is tossed around when it's supposed to refer to a tiny minority of people. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 02:11 AM Flag
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My mother is beyond waspy but grew up LMC in the Midwest. Still has the same characteristics as wealthy WASPs [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 02:03 AM Flag
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My best friend is from London, Ontario. His family is so Catholic, it hurts (he is of Ukrainian & Irish descent). Canada is historically much more Anglo (English) Than the US--you didn't have the huge waves of immigrants from poor countries in previous centuries. Here, there is some weird underlying belief that somehow the original settlers are the "real" founders of American culture, and everyone else crashed the party. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 02:10 AM Flag
[ - ] It really annoys when when people speak about themselves in passive voice. Example: the most popular post where the woman "find herself in a situation" where she's dating a married man with kids. Um no, you PUT yourself in that situation. Take some responsibility. What other examples do you guys see in life or on UB of people reframing narratives in passive voice so as to make themselves seem like victims in situations they themselves created... 3 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 01:49 AM Flag
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+1 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 01:53 AM Flag
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Elon Musk's wife wrote an article trashing him and in it she talked about how they dated in college and then broke up and she was a bartender thinking about teaching English abroad and she said "I heard myself tell my sister, I think I may have missed something with Elon" and have him a call years after college. You know, after he had made bank and she realized she wanted in on it. I mean I'm not blaming her for her actions but the way she phrased it seemed manipulative. It's like, just be honest: you saw how rich he became and realized you wanted him back [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 01:53 AM Flag
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+100000 passive voice is used to conceal /avoid taking responsibility. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 02:03 AM Flag
[ - ] We are at in- law's house. My DH is constantly nagging about one or the other thing. Yesterday, I was sitting with in-laws and DH. DH told me that I cannot even dress baby properly. I lost it and walked away. I went straight to my room. DH returned after half an hr. He did not say a word and went to bed. I have a feeling that MIL is supporting and encouraging him. 6 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 01:49 AM Flag
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^^ otherwise he would have say something. We never go to sleep like this. We always talk.. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 01:50 AM Flag
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ugh, I just found out there is a 90% chance we are moving back to DH's hometown. Meaning we will be living within a 30 min drive from MIL. this is my worst nightmare. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 01:51 AM Flag
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OP: we live thousands of miles away. I will make sure that we never return. Also I won't be coming for this long for Holidays. Waiting for my SIL to arrive within few days.. It's gonna be much more worse. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 01:54 AM Flag
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*hug* hang in there. last time they visited, my friends told me to take a shot to take the edge off and it helped me tremendously. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 02:02 AM Flag
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did you tell him that you are upset he would criticize you like that, especially in front of people - let alone mother-in-law? tell him to just learn to zip it until you guys are no longer sleep deprived and also back to a "normal" routine at home rather than when traveling during the holidays [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 01:56 AM Flag
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This. And I wouldn't assume MIL is behind this either, I'm not saying she isn't but ultimately this is his fault. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 01:59 AM Flag
[ - ] Confession: We spent over 80K on dining out this year. 16 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 01:47 AM Flag
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Bull [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 01:49 AM Flag
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I kid you not [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 01:50 AM Flag
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My parents did this. There was not a whole lot left over when they passed but they enjoyed life I guess. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 01:50 AM Flag
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It is their money. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 01:52 AM Flag
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I don't even want to know how much I spend on dining out. I am going to retire in a card board box. I own absolutely nothing and going on a 30k vacation next week. Something is fundamentally wrong with me. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 01:50 AM Flag
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OP- I hear you. But you can't take it with you, right? :) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 01:52 AM Flag
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30k??? How many kids? Where? We are spending 5k, flying with miles. Two DCs. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 01:58 AM Flag
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wow, i would not be able to sleep and my stomach, could not imagine - do you have debt? or do you just spend it all? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 02:01 AM Flag
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where are you going? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 02:07 AM Flag
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200 dollars a day. It could happen. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 01:50 AM Flag
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It really couldn't. Describe a week in the life of people who do this.... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 01:59 AM Flag
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5 people who order every bite of food they eat? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 02:07 AM Flag
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I could do it pretty easily. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 02:03 AM Flag
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And? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 01:52 AM Flag
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Did you pay for other people besides your family on a regular basis? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 01:59 AM Flag
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Some, but not a lot. and it's just DH and me (no DCs) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 02:03 AM Flag
[ - ] Advise a 26 year old on love. How much should passion play into finding a good quality DH? I know putting passion above things like loyalty and stability is a bad idea, but where does passion rank overall? 8 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 01:46 AM Flag
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Pretty low. The passion fades within 1-3 years. but attraction should not be nonexistent. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 01:48 AM Flag
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op: Can you differentiate more between attraction and passion? I mean I'm physically attracted to my current bf. I'm also attracted to his sense of humor, his ambition, and his kind heart. But sometimes he does things I find to be turn offs like watching sports or playing video games and being messy, and I could see my attraction overall becoming more muted over time [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 01:56 AM Flag
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Focus on all of his positive attributes. No one is perfect. Not to be negative, but being too picky is the fast track to ending up alone, imo. Passion is very short-lived; attraction can last a lifetime, but it becomes more muted over time. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 02:05 AM Flag
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I used to play this game like - imagine this guy as your husband bending over your baby carriage and loving your baby. That made a lot of guys so much hotter picturing them in the future as dads. As opposed to the "hot guys" [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 01:52 AM Flag
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When I was 26 (I am 31 now), I said to myself enough. I will not let myself be treated like shit anymore. I met my DH 9 months after that affirmation. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 01:52 AM Flag
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common values and passion [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 01:52 AM Flag
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Very low. Compassion ranks much, much higher. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 01:56 AM Flag
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This! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 01:57 AM Flag
[ - ] Yay. Today was my last day of therapy. Excited, nervous and feeling accomplished in a subtle and hard to describe way! 3 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 01:45 AM Flag
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I can't even imagine the day! Congrats! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 01:48 AM Flag
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very good!! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 01:53 AM Flag
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Great! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 02:04 AM Flag
[ - ] 1st grader dc started piano lessons this September. Could someone with experience comment on what kind of progress should be expected by this point (4 months of weekly 30-min lessons plus homework)? Where was your dc by this point? 10 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 01:41 AM Flag
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nowhere. that is really the very beginning. should be starting to identify the notes and play them. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 01:43 AM Flag
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this [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 01:45 AM Flag
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TY I have no musical training so it's very hard for me to tell where dc is and where they should be. Dc can play very simple tunes, I mean VERY simple, maybe 12-15 notes total, only white keys, from memory. Dc can recognize most notes. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 01:47 AM Flag
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normal [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 01:53 AM Flag
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Too early to be concerned [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 01:46 AM Flag
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I'm not concerned at all. Dc loves music, and my only hope is that she continues to love music. I'm just curious, more than anything. There are benchmarks for "grade levels" for other subjects, is there anything like that for music? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 01:51 AM Flag
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How about after 2 years? My kid is now learning to read notes in beginning of Sept after 1 year of training. Before teacher colored in the notes and my kid memorized them that way. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 01:53 AM Flag
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That's not how I would do it, but maybe the teacher wants to make the dc feel more accomplished sooner by having them play songs that way. 2 years should be playing simple songs with two hands. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 01:55 AM Flag
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Can you define simple songs? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 02:01 AM Flag
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How old is dc? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 01:56 AM Flag
[ - ] I'm redoing my living room. I saw a rug for $13K. Is this ridiculous? It's 9 x 12. I would base the room around it and then need a couch, two chairs and a coffee table. Then one or two lamps/ceiling fixture and drapes. 9 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 01:41 AM Flag
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If it is a high quality rug that is going to last you over the years...totally worth it in my opinion. I've never spent that much for anything, but I'm a fan of pieces that will last. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 01:42 AM Flag
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It is a beautiful rug, but it's still something people will walk on! It's gorgeous and I love it, just not sure if the proportion of spending is off. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 01:44 AM Flag
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Ridiculous waste of money [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 01:47 AM Flag
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No. Buy what you love. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 01:54 AM Flag
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It really depends on your total budget. I decorated my living room for that much in total (minus a storage piece, coffee table, and one particular lamp) - but my space isn't huge and that's what we could reasonably afford. I shopped at places like Restoration Hardware and Serena & Lily (and lucked out on One Kings Lane) - so not high-end, but not Ikea either. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 01:57 AM Flag
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I'm sure it looks great. I don't really know how much the budget is. In my mind it's $25K for the whole room. I have no idea if that is the right amount of not since obv you can do it for way more or way less. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 02:01 AM Flag
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is it vintage excellent oriental ? if not, then what makes it worth that much? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 02:00 AM Flag
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It's not vintage but it looks like a distressed oriental, which gives it a modern twist. Background is grey/cream and design is charcoal and blues. Has some silk in it but mostly wool. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 02:04 AM Flag
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Eh. If it's not silk seems incredibly overpriced. From ABC? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 02:08 AM Flag
[ - ] I bought delicious jams for the teachers. They each cost $8. My kids made cards. Is this too cheap? 9 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 01:35 AM Flag
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I think those are very nice presents. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 01:37 AM Flag
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yes. don't give jam. seriously, no one likes that shit. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 01:37 AM Flag
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It's really delicious and I don't even like jam! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 01:38 AM Flag
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this. wtf. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 01:43 AM Flag
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Wonderful! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 01:42 AM Flag
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Better than some Pinterest craft project. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 01:43 AM Flag
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I think it's perfectly nice. I like food gifts. The only people who do not like food gifts seem to be people who are trying to watch their weight which makes sense. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 01:55 AM Flag
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Nope [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 01:55 AM Flag
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High school teacher here. I think that is really lovely and thoughtful, especially paired with a sincere note. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 12.19.14, 02:03 AM Flag
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