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[ - ] Noticed lazy eye in our 2yo DD recently. Only a small pct of the time focusing on near objects. When to report to pediatrician or do something about it? Do these go away for a good pct of cases? 1 Reply [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:51 PM Flag
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Take her to a ped opthamologist. I had this, dd too. In my day they said wait and see if you grow out of it- I didn't and ended up with surgeries and patching. With dd we intervened early because I recognized it, was assertive and aggressive with treatment. Her vision was corrected with just glasses, nothing invasive. She doesn't even need glasses anymore but we still go in for a checkup every 6 months. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:54 PM Flag
[ - ] Moms, please teach your ds to put a new roll of toilet paper on when he uses one up, refill empty paper towel holders, and not put an empty brita pitcher back in the fridge. I wish my dh knew these things. 14 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:41 PM Flag
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Why did you marry someone who still needs parental guidance? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:30 PM Flag
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he's a great guy. Loves dc, has a good job, smart, kind. We didn't live together before we married and I just assumed most college educated adults knew how to do basic household things. I assumed incorrectly. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:44 PM Flag
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Well, you know what they say about the spelling of "assume". [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:36 PM Flag
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They don't say that about the spelling of the word. They say that about what happens when you assume. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 05:07 PM Flag
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lol are you married? - np [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:39 PM Flag
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Oh please. Everyone has quirks like this. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:52 PM Flag
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+1 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 05:06 PM Flag
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DH is pretty good about everything, but low, he still never changes out the toilet paper. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:43 PM Flag
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+1 My DH is by any standard quite conscientious about stuff around the house, but I don't know that he's put the TP on the roll even in our 11 year relationship. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 05:06 PM Flag
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(meant to say "even once") [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 05:06 PM Flag
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OP--ok good to know I'm not alone :) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:56 PM Flag
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Must be a guy thing - we had some exterminators in the apt, and when I come back, I see piss on the walls and all over the toilet in TWO bathrooms. WTF. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:38 PM Flag
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I assume this is an issue of skills vs performance deficit [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 05:15 PM Flag
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ummm no. your DD can do it for him [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 05:05 PM Flag
[ - ] Need UB help - dad is incapacitated and almost off life support. His personal secretary - whom we fired last week - has now disappeared without handing over much of Dad's personal papers and things like keys. Dad was stupid enough to give her blank checks and she is writing herself checks on mom's bank account with all the money she has left insisting that Dad hasn't fired her and we have no authority to do so. Do we call police? 20 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:36 PM Flag
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Yes [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:37 PM Flag
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um yup [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:26 PM Flag
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Yes [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:38 PM Flag
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call police and get a credit freeze [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:38 PM Flag
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also call bank [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:27 PM Flag
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Do we ask them to stop payment to her as a payee? We don't know what checks she had. He left her in control of everything. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:40 PM Flag
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Bank will give you advice on what is best, but I would freeze the account. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:42 PM Flag
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They will freeze while sorted out. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:52 PM Flag
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Also put a hold on the accounts. Call the banks [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:39 PM Flag
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Do you have power of attorney or other documentation allowing you to fire his employee? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:29 PM Flag
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Yes - she was rightfully fired both by us verbally and then formally by mom's attorney (and dad's former partner) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:56 PM Flag
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I would get advice from this attorney. Not UB. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:56 PM Flag
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OP. Sister who has POA just got off phone with the police. They can't do anything. They said it's a civil matter. Mom's lawyer is not in his office. We're calling the bank. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:31 PM Flag
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Does sister have access to the bank accounts since she has POA? Maybe take the money out and transfer it to another account to protect it from the thief. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:44 PM Flag
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Bank should be able to help. Also change locks! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:34 PM Flag
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On the phone with the bank now! thank you so much. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:43 PM Flag
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Did you have the broker stalking you last week as well? If so, I'm really sorry. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:43 PM Flag
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OP. Yes that was us. This summer has been one long nightmare. I'm also the one with the sister that stole all the jewelry including dad's camera equipment and tripped back off to Russia. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:51 PM Flag
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My one sister and I have been excluded from mom & dad's affairs for years. We had our worries about mom (who is actually the sicker one) but dad was an attorney and we had no rights to manage anything about mom while dad was alive. When we got too close they closed ranks and shut us out. We didn't even know Dad was going in for this surgery until we got the call that it went very badly. Now we are untangling a huge mess because mom was completely in the dark about everything. I have received invaluable advice here in response to my many questions and vents. Thank you. You guys are keeping me sane. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:42 PM Flag
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You are all able to think more clearly when it's very difficult here. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:43 PM Flag
[ - ] Any idea where I can get softshell crabs to cook tonight in Manhattan? Thank you! 9 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:32 PM Flag
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wf [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:21 PM Flag
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Out! At least TriBeCa is. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:36 PM Flag
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the lobster place [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:21 PM Flag
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Thank you! I called and they will even hold them for me! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:42 PM Flag
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There is a place on 74 and 2nd that should have them. forgot the name of the ace but get our seafood and beef there [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:34 PM Flag
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Sorry it's 75/2nd, called Leonard's [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:35 PM Flag
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Thanks [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:42 PM Flag
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I really like the quality there. I hope they have them. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:46 PM Flag
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OCEAN KILLER [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:38 PM Flag
[ - ] Your favorite Robin Williams role? 10 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:26 PM Flag
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Mrs Doubtfire [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:27 PM Flag
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+1 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:26 PM Flag
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+2 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:39 PM Flag
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+3 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 05:18 PM Flag
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good will hunting [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:17 PM Flag
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Dead Poet's Society [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:36 PM Flag
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+1 I cry every time [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:49 PM Flag
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Dead Again - Cozy Carlisle [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:24 PM Flag
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Dead Poet Society [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:38 PM Flag
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Not an interesting choice but I'm going to go with birdcage [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:57 PM Flag
[ - ] Just delivered a DS. Really happy except having an impossible time breastfeeding. He seems to get frustrated and only latches for a few minutes on one breast. Not sure what I am doing wrong. Any suggestions for resources on how to do this properly? Feeling awful that I am giving him so much formula to offset my incompetence. 11 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:21 PM Flag
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Ask the nurse for help with it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:25 PM Flag
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How old is he? Get a lactation consultant immediately if you want to bf. try pumping to maintain supply. Get help with how to syringe feed and even to use SNS. You want to work on your own supply while teaching baby how to nurse. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:42 PM Flag
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Listen to this. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:39 PM Flag
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Ask the nurse and/or ask for a lactation consultant to visit you. You may need a better hold so that DS can latch on. Mine liked the "football" hold when he was tiny and that's not one that most moms try unless someone shows them how. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:29 PM Flag
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Yes my second liked football hold and also needed me to flatten the breast (midwife said to imagine squeezing a too big sandwich to fit in your mouth-- baby has a small mouth and not much jaw strength). [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:32 PM Flag
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Also look at kellymom for bf information. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:33 PM Flag
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Ask hospital for lactation consultant if still there--if not, call one in nyc. We got numbers from Real Birth. It was absolutely necessary and so helpful for me! Good luck! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:35 PM Flag
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Football hold and lots and lots of patience. And if you are giving formula, pump! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:52 PM Flag
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While you're in the hospital, use the lactation consultants as much as possible. Seriously. It's hard to get a hold of one outside the hospital while your baby is screaming hungry. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:40 PM Flag
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Remember your body is just starting to make milk. Baby probably frustrated because it's a lot of work for a slow trickle of collostrum. (My milk took 9 days to come in.) See LCs but just keep at it. Don't worry about formula intake. It won't hurt him. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 05:16 PM Flag
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^and the fact that he's latching (even if just for a moment) is great. That is a stumbling block for many. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 05:17 PM Flag
[ - ] How many days would you stay at theOrlando Disney World Resort before one gets bored ? Bringing 2 DDs, 8 and 10. 7 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:20 PM Flag
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Sorry for double post. See below. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:33 PM Flag
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Oh week. A day for you to park, a day for universal, a day to chill at the pool. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:33 PM Flag
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^ for each park is what I meant. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:34 PM Flag
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:-) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:25 PM Flag
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+1 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:25 PM Flag
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Zero. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:39 PM Flag
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a week plus a day or 2 to relax would be good. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 05:06 PM Flag
[ - ] New dieter here. Lost 4lbs in 2 weeks but weighed myself this morning and I was up 1.5! Don't want to get frustrated but for those who had a slow start, can you describe? I need some inspiration please.... 3 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:17 PM Flag
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Just keep going. It took me 2 months to lose 5 pounds, but a month later I am down another 5. That's 10 lbs this summer! I still have 15 to go, but I am starting to notice the difference. Some people lose faster, but don't let that get you down. Also, maybe drink more coffee--it helped me to curb my appetite. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:27 PM Flag
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^when I complained to my Dr. he said--so if you lose 1 lb a month you will be down 12 pounds in a year. Kind of gave me perspective as I have been gaining 3-5 lbs a year for the last few. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:28 PM Flag
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Exactly me! Started with 19lb to lose. Lost 5lb in first week and then 1lb in second. Last week was back up 3lb (not a good weigh in!) and this week lost 2of the 3 I gained. Had a sneaky look this morning and I've lost another 1.5. I'm learning to just keep with it and try not to be hard on myself. You'll get there!! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:51 PM Flag
[ - ] Sorry if this is TMI; is there any way to delay onset of menstruation? I'm afraid heaviest day will be on day of my international flight and lately I cannot be away from bathroom for more than an hour......what am I gonna do, wear adult diapers..I'm only half kidding 22 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:12 PM Flag
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Get on a cycle control pill. If you don't have enough time to do that and your flight is in the next couple of weeks, then you use super-plus tampons backed up with a nighttime pad. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:03 PM Flag
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Tampax purple--hard to get in some areas--you can order online. Also it may delay if you can take ibuprofin the day before it starts. I think it slows muscle contractions. Sorry--I had this. It was fibroids--miserable times. GL! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:05 PM Flag
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Is that like OB ultra? unfortunately I am coming back from Europe, so options may be limited here. I'll try Ibuprofin. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:20 PM Flag
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np Where do you live? Where I live, the purple is the lightest tampon - is your purple the super plus (which is orange here) or is it a level above super plus? I would love it if purple "goes to eleven"! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:09 PM Flag
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It is the level about "super plus" [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:16 PM Flag
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Nice - off to search - thank - [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:18 PM Flag
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^^sorry "above" not about [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:30 PM Flag
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^^sorry "above" not about [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:30 PM Flag
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Get an aisle seat. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:05 PM Flag
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WTF?! This sounds like a medical issue if you can't go an hour without changing your pads or tampon. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:29 PM Flag
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When I got to this point (even after a Mirena and ablation) I had a hysterectomy. Fibroids and polyps do this [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:45 PM Flag
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I've been there--peri [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:35 PM Flag
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I understand your frustration. Mine is the same way and I cannot take the pill due to health issues. Ibuprofen delays and makes it lighter. Stock up on the the biggest tampons you can find. And honestly, I wouldn't rule out a diaper or massive pads. I would rather wear one than have to walk off the plane soaked with blood. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:21 PM Flag
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NP: Ibuprofen makes mine WAY heavier [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:27 PM Flag
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Post hoc ergo propter hoc much? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:31 PM Flag
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ily [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:44 PM Flag
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what? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:51 PM Flag
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OR - That is odd. My GYN explicitly told me to take it to make the first couple days lighter, since they're the worst for me. But different people can react to the same drugs in different ways based on their genetics. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:46 PM Flag
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NP--Ibuprofen is a blood thinner. Thinner blood = faster flow. I always soak through tampons faster when I take it. But everyone's body is different [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 05:04 PM Flag
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nnp Taking in advance of your period can make it lighter in some cases because the thinner blood causes the flow to start sooner than it would have. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 05:06 PM Flag
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+1 on the night pads. They are extra-absorbent and extra-long. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:27 PM Flag
[ - ] Hitting my mid-40s and my size C boobs are shrinking. Any bra advice? Under $80, please. Thanks! 1 Reply [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:07 PM Flag
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Go to some shops and try on bras. Go to a very good shop and get measured. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:45 PM Flag
[ - ] what to do with 4 kids age 6-16 that all will enjoy? 2 boys and 2 girls 6 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 03:59 PM Flag
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For how long? An hour, or a weekend, or something in between? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:01 PM Flag
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a whole day [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:02 PM Flag
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bowling [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:02 PM Flag
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+1 At a bowling center with lanes and with other activities. The older kids can have their own lane, and they can all alternate bowling with video games or whatever else is on offer. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:06 PM Flag
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ice skating! fun in the middle of the summer [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:17 PM Flag
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Go to the shore- swim, rides, boardwalk! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:34 PM Flag
[ - ] wow. interesting. http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2732556/Widow-Boston-Marathon-bombing-suspect-living-New-Jersey-Tamerlan-Dzhokhar-s-two-sisters.html 6 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 03:58 PM Flag
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So what? People have to live someplace. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:06 PM Flag
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This woman fascinates me. I wonder how often do young women convert to Islam in this way? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 03:54 PM Flag
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I have a neice (Jewish) who met a guy and converted to Islam. They later divorced and she no longer practices. Sometimes people do things because they really believe it, or they do it because it get them something. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:40 PM Flag
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Why are they stalking these woman who had nothing to do with the bombing? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:08 PM Flag
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Being related to the bombers related them to the bombing. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 03:59 PM Flag
[ - ] S/O DD is trying to decide between Bryn Mawr or Barnard for ED. Her grandmother went to Barnard (but hated it), still I know more about it than Bryn Mawr. Which is the better SS school? 5 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 03:58 PM Flag
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^^this is to apply, obviously. TIA. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 03:58 PM Flag
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She should not base her applications on the experiences of previous generations. She should visit the schools and talk to current students, professors, and recent graduates. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 03:53 PM Flag
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Both equally prestigious. Barnard is a college in the city. Bryn Mawr is adjacent to Philadelphia but with a rural feeling campus. Barnard is pretty tightly tied to Columbia, although at Bryn Mawr students can take classes at U Penn, Swarthmore and Haverford. For me it would depend on which city I would prefer to experience for four years and what type of campus, but they are both going to offer a wonderful education. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 03:57 PM Flag
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Visit the schools and decide from there. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:15 PM Flag
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She should visit! She needs to find out which she likes best. They offer such different experiences because of their locations (city vs. rural), but both are wonderful. (I was accepted to both but went to a state school because of a scholarship. I really fell in love with Bryn Mawr, though. That one was my favorite.) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:40 PM Flag
[ - ] OP of the struggling with divorce decision post here. DH and I are meeting to talk in 2 hours. Initially I said I needed a break and space. He took that as me giving up and asking for a divorce. I told him I'll see him next week at our therapy apppintment and he demanded that we talk today or else he won't show up at the appt. I really have no idea what to do. It's easier just to do what he wants but that only satisfies him momentarily. Should I just push for separation? He says he is ready to work on things but he's still being control and pushy. If he changes significantly for the better then I want to stay married, if he doesn't then I don't want him alone with dd half the time. 35 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 03:53 PM Flag
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You're going to have to reconcile yourself to the fact that he has the same parenting rights that you have, unless you can prove abuse or neglect (which it sounds like you cannot prove). [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 03:44 PM Flag
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I know. That's why I'm considering staying in the marriage rather than sharing custody. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:03 PM Flag
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It takes two, and it sounds like he's about had it with your back & forth emotions and with therapy and with your rules. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:01 PM Flag
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You're jumping to a lot of inaccurate conclusions. Not at all helpful. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:14 PM Flag
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I read your other post and this one, and you come off as just as controlling and selfish as he does. My advice is that you reconcile yourself to his having 50% custody and start planning a new future for yourself. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:04 PM Flag
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Np You might be the worst judge of character ever to post. Don't listen to her OP. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:17 PM Flag
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OP has only made very general statements about her husband being moody, losing his temper and saying some mean things, being an "asshole", and spanking their daughter but agreeing to let OP do the spanking in the future if its necessary. She has not, in either thread, given any details that indicate her husband is abusive or neglectful toward their daughter. She hasn't even given any concrete examples of how he is so "controlling". It sounds like she just doesn't like him anymore. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:21 PM Flag
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What species are you? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:43 PM Flag
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There is no way I would say this guy is entitled to 50% custody. My point about the spanking is that your verbally abusive dh, who frightens you, gets physical with your child. That is more than a red flag. He's trying to blackmail you into seeing him today. Do not. He will be at therapy, he isn't going to miss an opportunity to have an argument with you. OP you need to see this for what it is and get your own therapy. You need to realize you have an abusive, frightening husband and he does not deserve unsupervised access to your child. Whether he gets it is down to a court, but you will not have to share your dd 50% of the time. You have a record to say he went to therapy when your dd was 9mo because of his behavior. This can be played right if you want it to. He's an abuser and a manipulator. Do not let him manipulate you today. I guarantee he's going to therapy next week. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:06 PM Flag
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Spanking is considered acceptable by half the population and by the law. No court is going to take away his half of custody because he believes spanking is acceptable punishment. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:12 PM Flag
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It's nothing to do with the fact he's spanking, I've spanked my kids, so has dh. I'm not frightened of my dh and he doesn't put me down and call me names. She needs to seek some real advice on this. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:14 PM Flag
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OP my thought exactly. He is a good dad when he's in the mood to be. I don't want to deprive dd of that and as crazy as it sounds I think I can protect her from the worst parts of him better if we are all together. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:28 PM Flag
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I'm the above poster telling you to see a lawyer... I'm passionate about this because I was the DD in your situation. My mom stayed until I was 16... From my experience, I am telling you to leave. Seek the counsel of professionals. Get confident, get a plan. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:18 PM Flag
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Thank you. Was your dad ever physically abusive? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:42 PM Flag
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My mom & I left my dad when I was 16 because he became physically abusive to me. He would stop whatever he was saying when I was a child, as I grew into a teen he stopped recognizing me as the 'child' in the room and so I was a target for his verbal abuse, too. He was physical with me the week before we ran. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:48 PM Flag
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You might benefit from holding on for a while, whilst you see a therapist and get some confidence to come up with a plan. You need to do this properly and stack the deck to protect your child in a custody hearing. I honestly think you have a chance. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:13 PM Flag
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Thanks. As much as I'm yearning for some improvement in the situation I am at a loss and need to keep gathering information and getting help. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:28 PM Flag
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Thanks. He's so unpredictable but I want to believe you. I also keep this false hope that if I oblige he will calm down whereas I know if I don't do what he wants or ignore him, take my space etc, he will escalate and I'll have that to deal with. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:25 PM Flag
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Go to a divorce lawyer, tell them what you've told us and tell them that you are in fear of your life. (Side note: how much does he scare you?) this isn't clean cut. Start a diary, OP, record what he says to you. At the very least you need to see a therapist who will help you reconcile that this is mental abuse. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:16 PM Flag
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I wish I would've been keeping a diary this entire time. I started documenting everything just last week. Last year I would've said I'm not truly afraid of him but the way things have gone I think it's possible he could snap [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:30 PM Flag
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You wrote in your other post that he has not hit you and you don't think he would. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:27 PM Flag
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I don't... really. But I also can't say I don't think it's outside the realm of possibility. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:44 PM Flag
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She does not fear for her life, and lying to her lawyer is not going to help anything. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:22 PM Flag
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At first glance he sounds like a nasty, threatening control freak. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 03:54 PM Flag
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Bingo [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:06 PM Flag
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^if true, I don't see a bright future [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:04 PM Flag
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You don't have a bad marriage just a bad attitude. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 03:56 PM Flag
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Da fuq are you reading? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:18 PM Flag
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I am. OP sounds very stringent and closed to her husband. Understanding and openness is what a good marriage needs. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:16 PM Flag
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He's an abuser. She's surviving. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:31 PM Flag
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Oh please. If like to hear his side of the story. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:41 PM Flag
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I would humor him to get him into therapy. There is a possibility therapy could help. Make sure you like the therapist though. If the first one you go to doesn't suit both of your needs, find one that does. Just like any other relationship--whether in personal life or business--you have to "click" with the other party. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:50 PM Flag
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You need a counselor who will coach you on how to stop letting him be pushy. When he dmands stuff, say no. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 05:05 PM Flag
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Here's the thing, being unpredictable with a potentially explosive temper IS controlling- it controls the partner in terms of normal pushing back bc anything that displeases the temperamental one is potential for abuse either in front of, or of, the dc. The poster who sees no problem with the dh and calls this de controlling herself is both clueless and the reason women in this situation are so afraid in custody battles. A power tripping unstable dh is exactly the kind to use the dc as pawn for control and fight for custody despite being an unfit parent. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 05:13 PM Flag
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THIS. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 05:17 PM Flag
[ - ] Any good crock pot recipes? 14 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 03:52 PM Flag
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No. Everything comes out like nasty stew. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 03:58 PM Flag
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not true [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:00 PM Flag
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+1 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:01 PM Flag
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+2 crockpot stuff is yum. Chicken and dumplings, clam chowder with cod filets, potatoes and peas; roast with vegetables, brisket ... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:00 PM Flag
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any recipes that you can share? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:01 PM Flag
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Do you have stuff on hand you want to use or is there something you feel like making? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:02 PM Flag
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Brisket makes me hurl. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:02 PM Flag
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Then I highly recommend that you not eat it [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:08 PM Flag
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OK, what doesn't? (Soups don't count because they're soups) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:11 PM Flag
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Curry [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:00 PM Flag
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Chicken or beef? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 03:59 PM Flag
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Or pork.Great with pork. Quarter a 4-5 pound Boston Butt. Coat in brown sugar, mustard powder, cumin, chili powder and paprika over night. Maybe a little cayenne. Cook in a quarter cup of apple vinegar. Onions and garlic too. 5-10 hours later you will have some great pulled pork. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:07 PM Flag
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I am going to make some kick ass pasta sauce today with my crockpot. I have a ton of garden tomatoes to use up, a nice big green pepper, and some ground beef and sausage for some meatballs. Perfect recipe for a crockpot. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:10 PM Flag
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[ - ] starting to think I have raised a spoiled brat. DH and I recently bought a ski chalet which we are so excited about. Went up to see it this weekend for the first time and our older DD realized she would not have her own room (she will share with younger sister, younger brother will sleep on pullout couch in loft). She whined constantly last night, says that since she has her own room at our beach house, she expects one here too or she 'won't be joining us'…wtf?! 39 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 03:46 PM Flag
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What are you going to name it? Or are you just going to tell everyone you are going up to your "ski chalet" with the kids? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 03:50 PM Flag
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we'll probably just say 'ski house' [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 03:52 PM Flag
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same problem here. We didn't want to listen to her whine so we bought her a studio ski chalet. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 03:41 PM Flag
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LOL. It's probably the 2nd 2nd house of Mud Road Mom. If you're going to be pretentious enough to call it a ski chalet, get one big enough so that everyone has a room. Poseur! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 03:55 PM Flag
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what would you prefer me to call it? ski house? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:01 PM Flag
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Mountain shack? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:04 PM Flag
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It's a ski house. And a very small one. A chalet is a wooden house in the Alps--Switzerland or France. Your use of the term is an affectation. Yours sounds like a step up from a trailer, but if it's a "ski chalet" in your mind, well..... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:04 PM Flag
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it's a ski house. fine. it is in vermont fwiw [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:06 PM Flag
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How old are your kids? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 03:53 PM Flag
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DDs are 15 and 8, DS is 12 [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 03:43 PM Flag
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Tough age. However, I would tell her that you are going to help her to lower her expectations and that as of now she does not have her own room at the beach house - she gets to share with younger sister there too!! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:07 PM Flag
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Bwahaha. "Ski chalet" Is this chalet in Chamonix? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 03:54 PM Flag
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lol. i wish. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 03:44 PM Flag
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csb [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 03:57 PM Flag
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bhf [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:05 PM Flag
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vba [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 03:53 PM Flag
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You've raised a spoiled brat because- DUH. Look at your first sentence? Try again... "Dh and I bought a house..." Pretentious and wondering where your kids got it??? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:05 PM Flag
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Exactement! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:06 PM Flag
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This. I am guesssing all DH's money [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:47 PM Flag
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actually, NO. we both work. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:37 PM Flag
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Easy solution. She doesn't go. I don't see a problem here. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 03:54 PM Flag
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we're planning on flying up every other weekend during the season. i'd prefer for her not to be home alone... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:06 PM Flag
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Get her a nanny. Will this be worse than sharing a room with her sister? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:07 PM Flag
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This. Her choice. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:07 PM Flag
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+1. let her sit home with a stranger. if you don't want spoiled brats don't treat them like spoiled brats. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:09 PM Flag
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NOT her choice. She's 15 and goes with the family when they go. She will have to suffer through this horrid agony. OP - your problem began years ago. Who is driving the bus - you or a 15 yr old. Jeez... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:10 PM Flag
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she will make the trip miserable if she goes. i know she will…. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:03 PM Flag
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You've already lost the battle with that attitude. That girl is going to have you doped up in a senior housing signing amendments to your will inside of 20 yrs from now... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:16 PM Flag
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oooh. this is a threat that may work. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 03:57 PM Flag
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Couldn't you afford a ski chalet with enough bedrooms for everyone? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:10 PM Flag
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yes…but we loved this particular house (for the views). i didn't think it would be an issue, it's not like we're moving in there. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:12 PM Flag
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Clearly not. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:01 PM Flag
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np. taxes and airfare are expensive. no need to be unkind. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:16 PM Flag
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NOKD [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:11 PM Flag
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I was being sarcastic. I am a jealous bitch because I don't have a ski house. Or a beach house. Or any house. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 05:00 PM Flag
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Starting to think? This didn't happen overnight, you have raised a spoiled brat. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:26 PM Flag
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ita! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:37 PM Flag
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Teens do not like to go away every weekend. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:46 PM Flag
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Leave her with grandma next time you go skiing. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:36 PM Flag
[ - ] Anybody watching extreme couponing? 3 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 03:45 PM Flag
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I'd love to but I'm really busy cutting my coupons. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 03:41 PM Flag
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Me too! I have to organize all of my toilet rolls by brand name and number of sheets per roll. They're blocking the hallway. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:08 PM Flag
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I have it on now, but not closely watching [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 08.23.14, 04:24 PM Flag
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