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[ - ] What would you think if your significant other was suddenly spending more time with his dc's (from marriage) at their home? More importantly, I am pg and don't like being left alone for long periods of time like this. Should I be worried, say something? 1 Reply [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 04:06 PM Flag
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I'd like to think that I'd be happy he was being a good dad (to his kids with me or with someone else). Could you suggest that he bring them back to your place more often? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 04:07 PM Flag
[ - ] Repost for the weekday crowd - if you have 2mm hhi, what "should" you be able to afford? 5 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 03:59 PM Flag
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A cup of coffee. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 04:05 PM Flag
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A pony. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 04:06 PM Flag
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nice vacations every six months. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 04:07 PM Flag
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+1 but i would think every 3-4 months, assuming no second home. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 04:02 PM Flag
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Link to the original post? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 04:07 PM Flag
[ - ] Trying to play it cool with a guy I met and not be too eager. How do I fight the urge to call him, etc. Don't want to scare him off by seeming desperate. 6 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 03:57 PM Flag
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Chill. To out with another guy [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 03:53 PM Flag
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Text him to show a little interest but don't go overboard [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 03:59 PM Flag
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no - wait for him to contact you. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 03:55 PM Flag
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+1 [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 04:04 PM Flag
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Go to You tube and google Amy Schumer one night stand skit. It's hysterical and really speaks to (in an exaggerated way) the difference between how men and women view dating. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 03:55 PM Flag
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p.s. not implying you had a one night stand, just the eagerness of it and the over thinking that we, as women do. Gl. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 03:56 PM Flag
[ - ] DD will be starting pre-k this fall, so we are gearing up for the K admissions process. DH went to a private coed school in NYC which is considered lower tier by UB standard. I would love to send DD to a more traditional SS school(Brearley, Chapin, Spence, CSH, MM, Nightingale), but DH already has his mind set on sending DD to the school he attended. I toured it with my SIL last year and don't like much about it at all and really don't see it as a good fit for DD. Hate the atmosphere of its high school, which even DH admits is not the best, but still says he had a great experience and wants DD to have the same. His family is still pretty active with the school, his parent are significant donors and have been for the last 30 years, nieces and nephews attend, ext. Anybody ever been in a similar situation or have any advice? I do not want DD to go to this school. 9 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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NY Schools 05.20.13, 03:57 PM Flag
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you can manage through it, but you will end up breaking glass w/ the family. you have to decide if it's worth it. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 03:59 PM Flag
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And possibly being shut out altogether, since Brearley, etc. are a crapshoot. Why don't you like this school? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 03:56 PM Flag
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Wouldn't judge anything based on the high school. Many kids decide to move elsewhere for high school, as their K - 12 class feels stagnating to them by then, moving on to Stuy, Laguardia, etc or other privates. Base your feelings on the elementary school. Seems to me you have a lot of reasons to look seriously at this one so make sure your reasons for pushing elsewhere, where you will not have as good a chance in a very tight environment, are stellar ones and not based on silly UB status. You can only first choice in one place, [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 03:54 PM Flag
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I don't mean the academics in the high school, the way the kids act in high school. Atmosphere is basically a bunch of rich teens partying on their parents money. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 03:57 PM Flag
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Np that is the case in many NYC high schools... [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 04:00 PM Flag
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It's pretty obvious you don't want DD at the school DH and his family seem to cherish so much. You need to really work it out with him. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 03:55 PM Flag
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Forget what schools you like and what school your husband likes: Where will your daughter do best? If your husband's school is a better fit for her, she should go there regardless of whether or not you like it. If she seems to take really well to, say, Chapin, then of course she should go there. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 04:01 PM Flag
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Can you be more specific about what you don't like? For example, "DD seems to need a lot of structure, and I dont see that here." Don't worry about the high school at this point, on the other hand. You can apply out if she wants to. Happens all the time. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 04:02 PM Flag
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You should apply to all of these schools first and then see where she ACTUALLY gets in before you make any decisions. Don't cross any schools off the list. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 04:01 PM Flag
[ - ] Anyone have a diet doctor in Manhattan to recommend? I am doing everything right - diet, exercise - but I can't shake the 15 lbs I need to lose. 7 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 03:53 PM Flag
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Diet docs are just quacks. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 03:47 PM Flag
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Weight Watchers. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 03:49 PM Flag
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How old are you op and has anything changed? High stress, post pregnancy? I've just been through this and it was a combination of post pregnancy at an older age and thyroid. You should probably begin with an endocrine checkup. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 03:58 PM Flag
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Try switching to Tab, wear the new Playtex girdle and smoke more? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 03:59 PM Flag
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Take speed. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 04:06 PM Flag
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Obviously, don't do this [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 04:01 PM Flag
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A little hijack here, but my doc recommended a nutritionist. Has anyone ever used one to lose weight? What kind of diets do they recommend? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 04:08 PM Flag
[ - ] What IS the appeal of the hipster look? Yes, call me old and out of touch, but just do me a favor and explain the appeal. Do men really go for this? 18 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 03:45 PM Flag
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Hipster men. I think the point is to not look like you. (No offense). You sound like my grandmother taking about hippies. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 03:47 PM Flag
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Agreed - except for the mustache [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 03:49 PM Flag
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None taken, but what does that mean? Not look mainstream? Conventionally attractive? No fashion tips from the current runways? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 03:56 PM Flag
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to look young and creative and current [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 03:53 PM Flag
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Not look cookie cutter. I think so many women starlets look exactly the same these days, some people want to look different. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 03:53 PM Flag
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And by the time a lot of trends make it to the runway they are over. It's like when grunge was in vogue, it was already over for most people by then. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 03:55 PM Flag
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+1. And you actually hear that sentiment from a lot of people on here - i.e., now that granite counter tops are in every single house, people on here don't like them. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 03:58 PM Flag
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It's funny that it doesn't translate to fashion here. I don't know anyone in real life who wears the stuff suggested on UB. It usually looks old or boring to me. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 04:01 PM Flag
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I thought hipster boys went for hipster girls. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 03:53 PM Flag
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Way specifically do you not like about it? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 03:48 PM Flag
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"What" [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 03:48 PM Flag
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Good question. I find hipsters insufferable. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 03:49 PM Flag
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+1 [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 04:02 PM Flag
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Me, too, and the whole "look" is so inauthentic and affected. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 03:56 PM Flag
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ita [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 04:00 PM Flag
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Hipsters, likewise, don't understand the appeal of your look. And people 200 years ago wouldn't have understood the appeal of either your look or the hipster look. Different people just like different stuff. Why so hard to understand? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 03:59 PM Flag
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+1 [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 04:03 PM Flag
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Can you describe what the hipster look is? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 03:55 PM Flag
[ - ] Only 4 1/2 pages of posts since I finished watching Mad Men last night. Based on what I see currently in the Most Popular Posts box, I'm not surprised at all. Keep doing what you're doing, ladies. You're doing well in driving everyone away. Then it'll be like the birds feasting on the carcasses, and won't that be fun? 4 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 03:44 PM Flag
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Que? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 03:40 PM Flag
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ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 03:40 PM Flag
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What's your point? Are you blaming people who posted about Mad Men for driving away the entire UB audience? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 03:44 PM Flag
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What? I've actually found it very nice the past few days. All the trolls have gone away so it's a good thing. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 04:05 PM Flag
[ - ] How often are you worried about your own health or a close family member's (i.e. you child, DH)? I feel like there is always something we're "keeping an eye on" and I hate living like this. Suggestions? 2 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 03:44 PM Flag
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Welcome to reality. I just spent the last 3 months visiting my mother in the hospital only to have to sign a dnr and have her taken off a ventilator because there was no hope. I think it is just life and sometimes it sucks. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 03:42 PM Flag
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Move NYC is a germ fest dump [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 03:42 PM Flag
[ - ] With all this talk of need for middle school in D3, can the new gen ed 452 go K to 8? 5 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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NY Schools 05.20.13, 03:43 PM Flag
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DOE does not like gen ed k-8s and generally does not approve them. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 03:44 PM Flag
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np: how good is Computer School? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 03:39 PM Flag
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why? the DOE would save so much $$ and resources if there were fewer admissions processes to go through. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 03:47 PM Flag
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the DOE doesn't do anything that makes sense or is cost-effective. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 03:43 PM Flag
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+1 and I really don't understand why the hell not? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 03:52 PM Flag
[ - ] Anyone's dc learned to ride a bike before 6yo? My DS seems ready physically, if that makes sense but I wonder if he'll be frustrated falling off in the beginning. He's quite sensitive and a bit of a baby to be honest. 12 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 03:43 PM Flag
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Oh Jesus let him fall a few times [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 03:38 PM Flag
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op--it isn't the physical part of falling that has me worried. i don't want to spend an afternoon with him crying and melting down. there's a difference. if he falls and can handle it, fun! if he spends the whole time whining, not fun. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 03:46 PM Flag
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I tell my kids that we will do it only if they hold it together. If they whine and cry a lot, then we stop. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 03:49 PM Flag
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If he spends the whole time whining then take the bike away and tell him he can try again when he's ready for it. I also have a whining 6yo and this is what I do and it works. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 03:58 PM Flag
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Everyone's frustrated when they fall off. I wouldn't let that stop you. However, my kids were 4 when they learned and they never fell off, so at 6, he may just start riding. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 03:45 PM Flag
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OP: interesting. I thought most children learn at around 6. will give it a go [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 03:46 PM Flag
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I learned at 5, my kids younger (balance bikes). 6 is actually a little on the old side IMO, at least in NYC. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 03:58 PM Flag
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um yes [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 03:46 PM Flag
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My son learned when he was 3. I don't really remember him falling, other than maybe when he stopped. And it took awhile for him to learn how to start by himself (maybe a couple of months), during which time we just gave him a little push to get him going. My daughter learned at 5 and never had any issues right from the start. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 03:48 PM Flag
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Daughter was about 4, but is a dancer and good with balance and she just figured it out. My son learned when he was about five but he needed lots of help learning. When I thought he was ready I took off his training wheels and practiced with him for a couple of afternoons. He fell a lot but was determined. When they are ready, the falling doesn't stop them. Mainly, it's just practice and patience. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 03:46 PM Flag
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Mine both did by 4 but we went the balance bike route. If I were you take the pedals off, lower the seat so that his feet are flat on the ground when he sits and just let him run around, he'll get there. Don't help him or even make a big deal of it, just let him go off and figure it out. For SURE don't play into his frustrations or 'giving up' [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 03:57 PM Flag
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Op ours all biked early but we don't live in NYC. My advice is skip training wheels, go on a soft surface like a track around a football field and just let them go. Of course they'll fall but if you're on soft ground it's ok. Have them wear a helmet. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 04:01 PM Flag
[ - ] how have you been touched by cancer? do you feel like more young people--late 30s, early 40s--are being diagnosed? any thoughts on why this is the case? i currently know at least 7 people under 45 with cancer and not just breast cancer either. throat. pancreatic. etc. so depressing. 12 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 03:42 PM Flag
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just diagnosed myself, and in shock. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 03:38 PM Flag
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OP: I am really sorry. Do you have a good support system? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 03:45 PM Flag
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It is a horrible disease [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 03:45 PM Flag
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maybe it is the environment you live in? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 03:45 PM Flag
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NYC [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 03:47 PM Flag
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NYC isn't a cancer cluster [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 03:42 PM Flag
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Lost my sister to cancer at 14. It seems like the healthiest people I know, who take great care of themselves, are getting diagnosed left and right. Doesn't make sense [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 03:48 PM Flag
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My sister died. We live in a toxic world. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 03:43 PM Flag
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My dad had brain cancer at 33. Died 18 months later. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 03:45 PM Flag
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Wow how did he find out? So sorry that sounds extra terrible. Sorry for all of you. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 04:01 PM Flag
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My aunt died of cancer when I was 3. I have known people with cancer all of my life. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 03:48 PM Flag
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Me too. I also know plenty of people who have survived. Even Michael Douglas who had stage 4 is ok. You need to always remain positive. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 04:02 PM Flag
[ - ] All this kerfluffle over the validity and fairness of the G and T. There is nothing about the G and T process that makes it stand out to me -- the entire public school system in NYC is set up in ways that are unfair to children and use invalid methods of measurement to make important decisions. But this is the only piece of it that parents really mobilize to change. 11 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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NY Schools 05.20.13, 03:41 PM Flag
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ita. because these parents who fight tooth and nail over g&t seats think they deserve better and have the resources to make sure they get what they supposedly deserve. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 03:45 PM Flag
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That's probably because the parents who go through the bother of researching the process and having their kids take the test and apply, are the ones who are more likely to complain. Parents who end up sending their kids to zoned schools are more likely to just go with the flow. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 03:49 PM Flag
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It's not just complaining -- they file lawsuits. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 03:45 PM Flag
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only 1 parent filed a lawsuit-or were there more? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 03:48 PM Flag
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one parent was enough to halt the process [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 03:59 PM Flag
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it happens every year and i shouldn't be surprised. but it's just so bizarre to me. a lawsuit? really? over a seat at a g&t? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 03:49 PM Flag
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We "ended up" sending dc to our zoned school after dc qualified for a citywide. And there are plenty of engaged, involved parents there who keep abreast of what's going on with the DOE, research all the options for ms, etc. Don't assume gen ed parents are clueless. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 03:52 PM Flag
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These people who filed the lawsuit think a supposed "perfect score" on the exam entitles them to a seat at BSI. There are hundreds of kids who are in this boat. Whether a 4 year old got one question wrong or two on the test should not be the deciding factor. What is this, China? It would be really easy to open a couple new schools. If only people could band together to demand more seats. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 03:54 PM Flag
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ITA but I wish the focus wasn't on G and T! All kids deserve a school like BSI. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 03:56 PM Flag
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Not so easy. The DOE has priorities other than mc families whose dcs will succeed at any school. And frankly, I agree with the DOE on this. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 03:56 PM Flag
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I agree that its all unfair. I also believe that if G&T went away completely parents would be mobilized to change the whole system. Because so man of the vocal (aka educated/money) parents have the G&T option they're not forced to try and really change local bad or mediocer gen eds. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 04:00 PM Flag
[ - ] I'm sure we won't be seeing "Dalton" in the name polls any time soon! 7 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 03:40 PM Flag
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Why not? What did I miss? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 03:46 PM Flag
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http://www.cnn.com/2013/05/19/us/new-york-student-killed/index.html?hpt=hp_t2 [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 03:58 PM Flag
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Did we ever? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 03:49 PM Flag
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Yes, it's a terrible place. Girls don't even think of applying your 4 year old there next year...Just horrible. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 04:04 PM Flag
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So you've got a three year old? [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 04:05 PM Flag
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no comment [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 04:06 PM Flag
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it is unbelievably selfish and solipsistic of you to think that in light of this tragedy. shame on you. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 04:01 PM Flag
[ - ] So annoyed right now. I am a freelancer, and I have 3 clients who have yet to pay me for projects that I submitted invoices for over 2 months ago. I am not some big company that can absorb these costs long term; if I don't get paid, I can't pay my bills. Has anyone else been in this situation? 2 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 03:35 PM Flag
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I feel for you, I had (operative word: had) a client like this and dumped them. It was theoretically a bureaucratic issue (it was a university) but it took about 9 months to get paid and that was just unacceptable. Can you ask for a retainer up front if there are additional projects? Or withhold materials until payment is made? The latter is what I ended up doing. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 03:44 PM Flag
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In the future I should probably ask for half to be paid at the start of the project (that's what we did when I worked for an agency). I can't really withhold anything, because a lot of the work I do is in real time - so not a specific deliverable I can withhold. [ Reply | More
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General Topics 05.20.13, 03:51 PM Flag
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