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[ - ] Has anyone dated an I-banker who was actually looking for a serious relationship, or are they all just looking for sex? I ask bc I think I have found a good one but have heard terrible things about his profession. 5 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 04:23 AM Flag
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I'm married to one. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 04:24 AM Flag
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OP- How was dating him? how does he treat you now? W [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 04:29 AM Flag
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hat are his hours like? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 04:29 AM Flag
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He's sweet, I love him. He's home for dinner but I do not think that is normal. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 04:34 AM Flag
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DH was an I-banker when we first started dating. Moved into trading after a few yrs and has been doing that for a while now. He is an incredible DH. I'm very very lucky. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 04:49 AM Flag
[ - ] I have not told my daughter's father about her. It was a personal choice, one that I am at liberty to make. Today around three I get a call from a lawyer telling me that he was speaking on the father's behalf and that they would like to get 'in touch'. I can't exactly express my anger and rage through this keyboard, but I am flipping the hell out. 25 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 04:06 AM Flag
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*And please, for the love of God I don't want to hear a bunch of 'fakes' thrown around, nor am I looking to be flamed about the choices I have made in the past. Also, is this normal behavior for a lawyer? To call on a random day announcing this? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 04:18 AM Flag
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*And please, for the love of God I don't want to hear a bunch of 'fakes' thrown around, nor am I looking to be flamed about the choices I have made in the past. Also, is this normal behavior for a lawyer? To call on a random day announcing this? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 04:18 AM Flag
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As a lawyer (although I don't handle this sort of thing), in these types of cases it is normal for a lawyer to reach out to the mother/father as a 'first move'. If he is taking this seriously, I would watch out. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 04:09 AM Flag
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You're screwed. He was able to resist the urge to call you up screaming... the first thing he did was getting in contact with a lawyer. You have one calm, rational son of a bitch on your hands. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 04:22 AM Flag
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this. he is playing to win. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 04:22 AM Flag
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This [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 04:40 AM Flag
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Why didn't you tell him? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 04:22 AM Flag
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I didn't feel the need to. He told me a lot of things he never meant, made me feel special and then he just stopped contact and banned me from his building. I was hurt and I didn't want to be pressured into an abortion. Later I worried about him taking my baby away from me. I was a stupid little girl at the time and it was a really fucked up relationship. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 04:24 AM Flag
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how old were u [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 04:26 AM Flag
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I was nineteen and he was hitting thirty (no, I'm not joking). [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 04:26 AM Flag
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serves you right, maybe your dd will finally get a father [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 04:25 AM Flag
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how old is the child now? and how did he find out? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 04:16 AM Flag
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Eight. I honestly have no idea, it was a vague 'regarding your daughter, DD's name' message. He wasn't keeping tabs on me so it had to be somebody I know who reached out to him. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 04:30 AM Flag
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Is there something wrong with your daughter knowing and spending time with her father? Maybe he has matured, as you have matured from a "stupid little girl". [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 04:30 AM Flag
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You don't know that he wasn't keeping tabs on you... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 04:47 AM Flag
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One of your other personalities must have told the father. Either that, or you called him while in a meth induced haze? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 04:30 AM Flag
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I've been sober for years. I know it had to be somebody on my side, one of my sisters most likely. The oldest has always disapproved of my choice in this matter and the other is always looking for cash. It's very random, so probably my second sister. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 04:33 AM Flag
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How would they gain cash from your dd having a father around? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 04:48 AM Flag
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He has money. She would have dug around for a 'finder's fee'. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 04:53 AM Flag
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You are paranoid. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 04:44 AM Flag
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Deny the baby is his. Maybe they'll drop it and not force a paternity test. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 04:52 AM Flag
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Not going to happen - np [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 04:44 AM Flag
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Bad choices all around. You need to call a lawyer. Now. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 05:04 AM Flag
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I'm not sure about the "liberty to make part". In any event I'd expect some sort of visitation arrangement now -- voluntarily or not. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 04:55 AM Flag
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Yeah. since OP never told him, she can't claim abandonment. I'd be concerned. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 04:58 AM Flag
[ - ] What's the best weight loss tip you've ever received? Trying not to eat everything in my kitchen. 9 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 03:55 AM Flag
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Don't eat everything in the kitchen. A dietician friend swears by portion control by using a lean cuisine tray as a measure for all meals. If it doesn't fit in it, don't eat it. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 03:51 AM Flag
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I love this! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 04:24 AM Flag
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Not really a tip that I received, but something that seems to help keep me at a reasonable weight is coffee for breakfast, moderate portions at lunch/dinner, and sweets really are a once in a blue moon thing for me. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 04:11 AM Flag
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So nothing aside from coffee for breakfast? I do that often but I defintely eat more than that rest of day. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 04:25 AM Flag
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Yep, just coffee (with a splash of milk). I honestly am not really hungry in the morning anyways. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 04:17 AM Flag
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Meal , snack 3x a day. Don't ever let yourself get really "hungry". Log what you eat. Exercise. Water...8 glasses a day. Limit alcohol to 2 x per week. Always sit at the table for meals and snacks and be mindful of what you eat...no picking and eating on the fly. Prepare, prepare, prepare. Cut up and clean veggies so they are readily available for snacking, plan meals, have lots of fresh produce and proteins always available. Good luck. You can do it. I lost 40 ponds doing this. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 04:25 AM Flag
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Most logical weightloss advice I've ever seen :) [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 04:43 AM Flag
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every-other-day diet. totally revolutionized my eating [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 05:05 AM Flag
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A friend told me that you need to be a little hungry to lose weight.. the hunger is indicative of a calorie deficit.. and that deficit is the only way to lose weight. In one way this of course make sense however.. I haaate being hungry, so I live on Atkins. When I need to drop a few I count calories and stick to 1200, but doing it low carb means I don't feel hungry. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 05:00 AM Flag
[ - ] s/o Rumson post.. is there any place in Westchester/NJ that's known for having a lot of WOHMs? Nothing against SAHMs but I don't want to be the odd woman out. Seems like a lot of wealthy towns in Westchester that I've seen are full of SAHMs (I guess bc the commute deters a lot of people) but I would like to have more space and guaranteed good schools. Any suggestions? 4 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 03:45 AM Flag
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The New York Times had an article about companies/websites that are breaking down that data for potential homeowners. www.nytimes.com/2014/07/20/realestate/using-data-to-find-a-new-york-suburb-that-fits.html [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 03:52 AM Flag
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"So they turned to Suburban Jungle Realty Group, a personal relocation firm that works one-on-one with city dwellers looking to move to the “right” suburb.Though a licensed brokerage, Suburban Jungle acts more as a savvy guide, says the company founder, Alison Bernstein. Staff members interview clients in depth about their needs, values and lifestyle — liberal or conservative? Full-day or half-day kindergarten? Summers away or at home? Then it suggests some potentially appropriate towns." [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 03:53 AM Flag
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This. Use suburban jungle [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 05:04 AM Flag
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I would want to live in a place w people like me. Go for it [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 05:04 AM Flag
[ - ] Why would a single guy keep in pretty close contact with a married woman/friend after they had admitted strong mutual feelings, kissed and made the decision that they shouldn't go further? He has claimed he is just trying to be a good guy…. 2 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 03:30 AM Flag
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Are you that clueless? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 03:34 AM Flag
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this has extended over 4 years, if he wanted to just fuck me he could have at different points in time, after a few close calls we decided that we don't want to go there even though it would be amazing, it's not worth it. Why would he still want to remain friends and be in contact? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 03:38 AM Flag
[ - ] db born two weeks ago. we live abroad, and so the birth cetificate process is a bit different... dh and i going tomorrow to "register" him and get official birth cert. i'm having second thoughts on his name and now want to change it to our 2nd choice before making it official tomorrow.. prob is we've already "announced" him with the first name and i'd hate to come off like a flake about it. but when i see him, especially two weeks in now, i really think #2 name is it! WWYD?? 25 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 03:18 AM Flag
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^another prob is that we used FIL's name as his middle name, and if we change it to #2 choice, FIL's name goes out the window. i think he'd be hurt, as he was so pleasantly surprised we used it in the first place... grrrrr why can't i just shake this? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 03:19 AM Flag
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why can't you change it but keep FIL's name? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 03:10 AM Flag
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^ you definitely can't do that, you can't give someone that and then take it away [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 03:10 AM Flag
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op. damn, you're prob right. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 03:22 AM Flag
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because it doesn't go with #2 choice. sounds awkward [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 03:22 AM Flag
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Middle names don't matter. You'll rarely use it later in kid's life...and just use the initial. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 03:26 AM Flag
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This..who cares about middle names? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 03:32 AM Flag
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What are the names? We will tell you if it is awkward [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 03:16 AM Flag
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No one ever knows or says the middle name after like 3 months of the baby's life. Just keep the middle name. It seems like a huge deal when they are little but literally not a single person will think about the kid's middle name by next year. And you'll spare some heartbreak for your FIL. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 03:32 AM Flag
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Make it 3 names if you must keeping FIL's name in the mix...Robert Michael James Smith [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 03:18 AM Flag
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op. i've been considering this today... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 03:33 AM Flag
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op. thanks so far guys... but FIL's name aside... what about the flake factor? does it come off like we're weirdos/fools, changing db's name two weeks in, after everyone's written in their congratulations, FB comments, visited us, etc and use his current name? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 03:45 AM Flag
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Not at all, just say "we were fluctuating between two names, thought we'd picked the right one, and changed our minds." People will talk for a few weeks but that will be it. This is the problem with the facebook nation. 40 years ago this happened all the time and people probably didn't even know about it. My parents didn't pick my name till I was a week old. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 03:36 AM Flag
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this. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 05:04 AM Flag
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non-issue. People will forget very quickly. Your close friends will understand, the rest don't matter. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 03:47 AM Flag
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Don't worry about it. It will be a fun story to tell your db when he is older. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 03:48 AM Flag
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I know someone who changed her baby's name after a month. Yes, I and others thought it was flaky...but so what? Her kid is about to enter kindergarten now. We don't even think of it anymore and dealing with people thinking you are flaky is better than dealing with calling your child a name you don't like. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 03:39 AM Flag
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I have a friend who did that 20 yrs ago...she's flaky. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 03:40 AM Flag
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I might send out a second birth announcement, and even own the flakiness a bit. Have fun with it - Birth Announcement 2.0! -or something like that. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 03:58 AM Flag
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op. i didn't actually send out birth announcements... just fb/emails/instagram/phone conversations... [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 04:01 AM Flag
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yeah this.. own and laugh.. made a mistake everyone, his name is definitely xx! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 05:06 AM Flag
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I see no problem in this whatsoever.. guess what guys.. his name is actually xxx, I picked the wrong one but now I'm sure. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 05:05 AM Flag
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op. thanks so far guys... but FIL's name aside... what about the flake factor? does it come off like we're weirdos/fools, changing db's name two weeks in, after everyone's written in their congratulations, FB comments, visited us, etc and use his current name? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 03:45 AM Flag
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Well…I'm sorry to say that I have a friend who did this and while I no longer remember the baby's original name, I do recall that my friend is a complete flake. But here's the thing…she continues to be a huge flake about other things. What are you like? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 03:49 AM Flag
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Do it now. Laugh with your friends and family about the flake. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 03:51 AM Flag
[ - ] I am so down in the dumps. I am 31 and feel like everyone I know is ahead of me...all Married, with kids, their own apartments. We no longer have big get togethers on the weekends because everyone is so busy with other commitments. This weekend I literally have one thing planned. 17 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 03:14 AM Flag
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They're jealous of you. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 03:16 AM Flag
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Plan your own shit [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 03:17 AM Flag
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With who?? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 03:08 AM Flag
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Take some time to be on your own. Maybe you will meet a nice guy. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 03:18 AM Flag
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I have a boyfriend but he is working all weekend [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 03:09 AM Flag
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Ok - then just enjoy your own company. You don't always have to be with someone. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 03:21 AM Flag
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Yeah I know I need to work on that. Makes me a bit sad how much my life has changed over the last few years [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 03:12 AM Flag
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And it will continue to change. Nothing you can do about that! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 03:13 AM Flag
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Wanna trade? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 03:24 AM Flag
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+1 - I cherish my alone time. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 03:25 AM Flag
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Would also love to have a Boyfriend again!!! [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 03:27 AM Flag
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you have to be happy by yourself before you'll be happy with anyone else...otherwise you'll always be trying to get to "the next thing" in search of happiness [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 03:35 AM Flag
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I think this is wise advice. I just get embarrassed to say I am doing nothing on a Friday night. Should get over it [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 03:28 AM Flag
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say you're "relaxing" [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 03:29 AM Flag
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Yes and then plan something..try meet up.com, go to learn poker, sewing, mixology, rock climbing, whatever [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 03:31 AM Flag
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Hey I am 34 and divorced with two teens. Everyone's path is different. But enjoying your life is about enjoying your life, not comparing to someone else. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 04:13 AM Flag
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Don't worry. I'm 30 w DB and despite leading a happy and full life, look at my 30-32 YO friends and thinking they're having a blast. If you're not in NYC, move here. I promise there are a TON of single women of every age and you can totally go it alone and meet others. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 04:52 AM Flag
[ - ] Has anyone been following that story about that professor in Florida who was shot? Authorities in Florida think he was an not ended target. Thoughts? 10 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 03:07 AM Flag
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^an intended [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 03:10 AM Flag
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I am from Tallahassee, and my parents live in the neighborhood where it happened- typical nice Southern burbs where this sort of thing never happens. The police aren't saying anything except they think it was a targeted attack (and I think they only released that information to calm everyone down). There had been minor burglaries in the area over the past few weeks and people were terrified that it had escalated. I hope they find his killer soon. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 03:40 AM Flag
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Also following. Can't see how he was the intended victim [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 03:05 AM Flag
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They think possibly even a murder for hire [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 03:07 AM Flag
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huh? so he was an intended target, how does that make the story more interesting? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 03:20 AM Flag
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huh? so he was an intended target, how does that make the story more interesting? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 03:20 AM Flag
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+1. OP's post makes no sense. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 03:30 AM Flag
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He had recently gone through a bitter divorce, and the ex-wife had publicly complained about being stuck in Tallahassee due to joint custody. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 04:59 AM Flag
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I actually went to law school with him, but did not really know how. However, by all accounts he was a wonderful person - a great father to his 2 young sons, excellent colleague, huge contributor to the academic community. Such a tragedy. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 05:10 AM Flag
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>> did not really know him [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 05:10 AM Flag
[ - ] Looking for feedback on Rumson, NJ. What are the schools and community like? We are thinking of moving there, house budget approx $3 million. Our kids are currently in private school but am open to good public schools. 8 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 03:07 AM Flag
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What about colts neck? [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 03:08 AM Flag
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Don't know anything about it. We would be moving from out of the area with 3 kids. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 03:11 AM Flag
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Rumson much nicer these days. Colts Neck got McMansioned. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 03:16 AM Flag
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Yup. In the 80s Colts Neck was so nice big families, horse farms, big houses, but gracious not flashy. Now it is like all these Bensonhurst families made some cash and saw it was ther promised land. Yuck. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 03:14 AM Flag
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No one from Bensonhurst lives in Colts Neck. You have no idea what you're talking about. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 03:31 AM Flag
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We live in the town next door. Rumson is very nice, the schools are great, and it's a treat to be right near the beach. It's also a place that has a lot of SAHMs with live in nannies, and the pressure to be up to par with the neighbors is quite strong. [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 03:40 AM Flag
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Sahm with full time nanny? Sign me up [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 04:55 AM Flag
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Better marry right [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 04:55 AM Flag
[ - ] Interesting trivia - the UK has had TWO hit singles titled "Things Can Only Get Better" - the first released by Howard Jones from his 1985 album "Dream into Action" (also featuring the hits "No One is to Blame" and "Life in One Day"). Howard Jones's song reached #5 in the US and #6 in the UK. The second was released in 1993 by Britpop/dance-pop band "D:Ream." After the album version of the song struggled on the charts for a while, a "poppier" remixed version became a massive success in early 1994, holding the #1 spot in the UK for an entire month. It was later used in Labour ads for the 1997 General Election (Tony Blair's famous triumph), once more re-entering the charts, reaching #19 that year. Former D:Ream keyboard player Brian Cox is now a notable public figure, appearing on science shows in the UK and the US. 9 Replies [ Reply | Watch | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 03:02 AM Flag
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Howard Jones's hit: [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 03:04 AM Flag
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The D:Ream hit version: [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 03:04 AM Flag
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...and the famous Labour ad incorporating the D:Ream hit: [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 03:05 AM Flag
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This can't be right. The spice girls were huge for a year or two [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 03:08 AM Flag
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Oh wait. Not two hit singles overall. Two hit singles with the same title. OK … thanks for the factoid I'll use it tomorrow in conversation [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 03:10 AM Flag
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She's back with her music trivia! I have only heard of Howard Jones' No One is To Blame. Never heard of any of his other songs/ [ Reply | More ]
General Topics 07.25.14, 03:23 AM Flag
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